Coronavirus Death Thread

[Boydy]

Heard about someone else going to a supermarket and it taking about three hours today.

This can't be sustainable, surely?

[Yevrah]

Heard about someone else going to a supermarket and it taking about three hours today.

This can't be sustainable, surely?

We'll run out of food before the end of people coping with that sort of shit arrives.

[Spikey M]

I went up the M&S Garage for some Coleslaw and washing up liquid. One in, one out. Took 20 minutes to get in. I might have to start going back to the corner shop. I stopped because they were trying to flog hand sanitiser for £20, but I think I value convenience over morals.

[Giggles]

I ordered a hundred euro of stuff from a meat shop last night and had it on the doorstep at 10am.

[Shindig]

Mine was just an extra half hour today. The queue was moving quicker and I only saw one person take the piss with five bags of shopping being dragged back to his van. Turns out the queue goes quicker if there's some oldies in it because they'll happily stand right next to each other. The benefits of village life, I guess.

[Don]

Unless supply chains are manned by asthmatic Doris', I think we'll be fine for food.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The food supply is fine but managing people at 2m in supermarkets to protect the staff (and customers) is a ballache.

[Yevrah]

There comes a time when all of those people in the supply chain are ill though. Maybe not all at once, but a significant proportion at any one time will be.

I've (finally) found a local butcher/cheesemonger that delivers. The happiest moment of my life that.

[Giggles]

There comes a time when all of those people in the supply chain are ill though. Maybe not all at once, but a significant proportion at any one time will be.

I've (finally) found a local butcher/cheesemonger that delivers. The happiest moment of my life that.

No there won’t be. You’re talking like it’s one supplier per product.

[Yevrah]

No there won’t be. You’re talking like it’s one supplier per product.

The world is about to all be sick at once. If you don't think that will have any impact on the food chain then I'd suggest you might be wrong.

[Don]

Yeah, by that logic absolutely every facet of society will collapse which is utter BS.

Also, can you fuckers start giving up meat, you disgusting cretins? You'll be first against the wall when this revolution comes.

[Magic]

That is a foul

I think a 30 year old man wearing the 90 series is worse.

[Giggles]

The world is about to all be sick at once. If you don't think that will have any impact on the food chain then I'd suggest you might be wrong.

When did you decide this doom?

[Yevrah]

Run out of food was sensationalist. I apologise.

Pretty sure there'll be shortages though.

[Yevrah]

When did you decide this doom?

I didn't. A virus going around did.

[Spikey M]

Whenever a veggie tries to pass judgement on me it makes we want to devour the nearest animal. There's a strong argument to be made that this whole mess was caused by a Chinaman eating a passing Pangolin to spite some Vegan twat.

[Giggles]

Whenever a veggie tries to pass judgement on me it makes we want to devour the nearest animal. There's a strong argument to be made that this whole mess was caused by a Chinaman eating a passing Pangolin to spite some Vegan twat.

Every time one of those cretins get preachy eat some extra meat.

[Don]

Solid line of argument. Wp both.

[Spikey M]

We've got ribs tonight. Looks like I'll be doing some chicken wings too.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Whenever a veggie tries to pass judgement on me it makes we want to devour the nearest animal. There's a strong argument to be made that this whole mess was caused by a Chinaman eating a passing Pangolin to spite some Vegan twat.

I saw someone on twitter saying they'd eaten meat their whole life but this has made them go vegetarian. If someone wants to go vegetarian then fine, please yourselves, but I don't really get why some Chinese backwater of a market would be the trigger.

[Spikey M]

I saw someone on twitter saying they'd eaten meat their whole life but this has made them go vegetarian. If someone wants to go vegetarian then fine, please yourselves, but I don't really get why some Chinese backwater of a market would be the trigger.

Wasn't it only a couple of years ago that half of Europe had E.coli because some cunt wasn't washing the lettuce?

Edit: 2011

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_Germany_E._coli_O104:H4_outbreak

[niko_cee]

It's sketchy, but I'm sure I saw an interview with an Italian doctor saying that once you're on one he hasn't seen anyone get off. That was a couple of weeks ago mind.

I thought I saw/heard something similar a while ago, but it must be rubbish - why would everyone be scrambling to build the things if that were the case?

[Giggles]

Veggies and vegans can never just go veggie or vegan and get on with it.

[Offshore Toon]

You lot complain about vegans/veggies way more than the other way around.

[Giggles]

You lot complain about vegans/veggies way more than the other way around.

Wrong. On the whole, far less.

[Shindig]

I thought I saw/heard something similar a while ago, but it must be rubbish - why would everyone be scrambling to build the things if that were the case?

Because ... they're currently .... in use?

[niko_cee]

Because ... they're currently .... in use?

Yeah, but if you don't come off them (other than in a box) it seems a bit pointless, no?

And veggie's are fine for the most part, the non-ethical ones anyway. Late-adopters in all fields are usually bellends.

[Baz]

Filled both cars up this morning, while petrol is only 102.9.

No doubt I’ll look back on this a a tremendous decision in a few months.

I wore gloves :dc:

[Giggles]

Because ... they're currently .... in use?

If they don’t work, and now we seem to know BEYOND DOUBT that they don’t, then they might as well be building screwdrivers then.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

On that ventilators point, there have been stories about old people beating the virus, surely they will have been on a ventilator.

[niko_cee]

You probably need to be well into the target bracket to even think about needing a ventilator, so maybe that's why people seem to be on them for ages and then die.

[Offshore Toon]

Wrong. On the whole, far less.
Not on TTH.

Not even irl imo, but maybe that's just my experience. I've found most veggies/vegans to be very respectful, but I obviously try to keep away from with the militant lunatics.

[Boydy]

I've been veggie since doing veganuary this year but I might go back to eating meat now because getting to a big supermarket to get a decent range of meat-free products is going to be a fucking ballache.

[Don]

This 'veggies won't shut up about it' is so 2015. Even the cretins are on board with it now after that dogshit documentary got them thinking it's their bacon intake that's making them fail to satisfy their women in bed.

[Kikó]

Corner shop was absolutely fine again. Managed to get in and out within 5 minutes. £45 for a pint of milk and 2 tins of beans.

[Giggles]

I’m stocked on meat and stocked on beer but I need to get crisps. The local off licence delivers and I might just get them to send me down 10 tubes of green pringles.

[Boydy]

This 'veggies won't shut up about it' is so 2015. Even the cretins are on board with it now after that dogshit documentary got them thinking it's their bacon intake that's making them fail to satisfy their women in bed.

:D

Are you actually veggie these days?

[Pepe]

:D

Are you actually veggie these days?

After he saw the documentary.

[Don]

Don't be a dickhead, I've just drastically reduced my meat intake. I ain't spent the required 50 hours of going through peer-reviewed papers to back it up fully but I'm currently of the view you can't give up meat FT unless you're gonna start becoming one of those macro twats.

[Giggles]

He’s not even a veggie. Twat :face:

[John Arne]

Indian social distancing

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[Don]

The circles :D

[Shindig]

To be fair to them, Modi sprang the lockdown on them so they were going to protest and desperately scramble a way back home.

[Lewis]

Top, top memories of Boyd becoming a vegetarian all them years ago. TEG practically falling out with him over it, and then having to get his leather jacket and leave in disgrace once posting pictures of steaks at him stopped being absolutely hilarious.

[Boydy]

I wonder what he's up to these days.

[Disco]

I'm still plumping for India in the 'Who Is Most Fucked' sweepstake.

[Magic]

Watching the Golazzo documentary. :drool:

[Yevrah]

Nearly another 900 in Italy, taking them to over 10,000 deaths now.

[Spikey M]

They've been hovering around a 10% increase every day for ages now. How much longer can that possibly go on.

[Yevrah]

Given how long it takes to kill you and the people who were already ill before the lockdown started, my guess would be it takes 4-6 weeks after a lockdown to see any decline.

[Bernanke]

I'm still plumping for India in the 'Who Is Most Fucked' sweepstake.

Same honestly, they lost 5% of their population in 1918, and back then they were only 315 million. With a bug that spreads like this and a state that isn't anywhere near China's potential in shutting things down, adding a billion people to that mix makes them a prime candidate for ending up the worst affected. I guess they have a pretty young average age going for them...

[Magic]

I'm hearing bullshit now about kids with separated parents having to stay with one until this is over. Fuck off.

[Yevrah]

Well, yeah.

[Spikey M]

Isn't that what Gove got wrong and corrected earlier this week?

[Magic]

Don't give a fuck mates.

[Disco]

Isn't that what Gove got wrong and corrected earlier this week?

This. He clarified later that that would qualify as essential travel and that you can swap them over as usual.

[Magic]

Just seen some bullshit on twitter about that whore on Jeremy Vine saying they should pick a parent and stick for maybe 3 months.

[Spikey M]

Just seen some bullshit on twitter about that whore on Jeremy Vine saying they should pick a parent and stick for maybe 3 months.

I'm on a parent site on Facebook and there's loads of bitter hags saying that. The question of 'What if the rules change when Daddy has them?' Immediately exposes them.

As things stand, you are free to carry on with your normal arrangement.

[Lofty]

Regarding Italy it is hoped that their numbers will start reducing next week, according to Dr John Campbell and co anyway. Megafucked if they dont.

[Lee]

Given how long it takes to kill you and the people who were already ill before the lockdown started, my guess would be it takes 4-6 weeks after a lockdown to see any decline.

Looks like the number of new cases is starting to fall in Lombardy and leveling off in all of Italy. Deaths will carry on growing for another 2-3 weeks you'd think.

[Spikey M]

Looks like the number of new cases is starting to fall in Lombardy and leveling off in all of Italy. Deaths will carry on growing for another 2-3 weeks you'd think.

Oof.

[Lewis]

The Italian growth rate has been working its way down for weeks. I like to imagine it will hit zero and then everyone will stream out of their houses like in a gameshow.

[Spikey M]

Kisses and hugs all round.

*Second Wave Klaxon*

[Disco]

It'll be like that scene from Temple of Doom.

[Lee]

Kisses and hugs all round.

*Second Wave Klaxon*

Lockdown until June, open up for the duration of our holidays. Special dispensation from Croatia/Greece, just for us. Happy to lockdown again when I'm back. I'm sure Boris has it in hand.

[Lewis]

1243949242432937984

These China-bumming cunts want shutting down.

[Lee]

Should have just shut China down.

[Giggles]

My work is on the new published extensive list so thankfully still be working


https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/ (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/)





1. Agriculture and Fishing (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#agriculture-and-fishing)
2. Manufacturing (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#manufacturing)
3. Repair and installation of Machinery and Equipment (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#repair-and-installation-of-machinery-and-equipment)
4. Electricity, Gas and Water (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#electricity-gas-and-water)
5. Construction (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#construction)
6. Wholesale and Retail Trade (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#wholesale-and-retail-trade)
7. Transport Storage and Communication (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#transport-storage-and-communication)
8. Accommodation and Food Services (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#accommodation-and-food-services)




9. Information and Communications (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#information-and-communications)
10. Financial and legal activities (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#financial-and-legal-activities)
11. Professional, Scientific and Technical activities (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#professional-scientific-and-technical-activities)
12. Rental and Leasing Activities (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#rental-and-leasing-activities)
13. Administrative and Support Services (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#administrative-and-support-services)
14. Public Administration and Defence (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#public-administration-and-defence)
15. Human health and social work activities (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#human-health-and-social-work-activities)
16. Community/Voluntary Services (https://www.gov.ie/en/publication/dfeb8f-list-of-essential-service-providers-under-new-public-health-guidelin/#communityvoluntary-services)

[Spikey M]

Lockdown until June, open up for the duration of our holidays. Special dispensation from Croatia/Greece, just for us. Happy to lockdown again when I'm back. I'm sure Boris has it in hand.

I'd vote Tory for life.

[Waffdon]

Never taking Brighton/Burnley on Super Sunday for granted ever again.

[Magic]

Looks like Waff is 2 weeks behind the rest of the UK.

[niko_cee]

:D

I definitely thought there was some merit in the idea that if they ever do complete the season behind closed doors/during lockdown, it should be, as much as possible, a game every day for however long that would take. About three months I guess, so maybe have to smooth it slightly.

[Giggles]

As sure as Taz trying to buy a 4 year old off a tourist, here’s todays Irish figures in Tweet form.


1243964315587223554

[Boydy]

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/mar/28/fruit-and-veg-will-run-out-unless-britain-charters-planes-to-fly-in-farm-workers-from-easter

Maybe Yev was right about running out of food.

[Shindig]

Looks like Waff is 2 weeks behind the rest of the UK.

So he'll peak in a month?

[Giggles]

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/mar/28/fruit-and-veg-will-run-out-unless-britain-charters-planes-to-fly-in-farm-workers-from-easter

Maybe Yev was right about running out of food.

You may try that link again horse.

[Manc]

Just done a supermarket run and no one was about. Pure bliss.

[Magic]

Just done a supermarket run and no one was about. Pure bliss.

I thought they were shut from 2000?

[Boydy]

You may try that link again horse.
Ah, shit. Tried to copy it from the app.

This work?

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/mar/28/fruit-and-veg-will-run-out-unless-britain-charters-planes-to-fly-in-farm-workers-from-eastern-europe


Also, horse?

[Giggles]

Ah, shit. Tried to copy it from the app.

This work?

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/mar/28/fruit-and-veg-will-run-out-unless-britain-charters-planes-to-fly-in-farm-workers-from-eastern-europe

It does indeed.

Yev will cream his pants.

[Boydy]

I thought they were shut from 2000?
Tesco here is still open till 10.

[Don]

Get those fucking tragic cunts crying about not being able to support their oversized family out into the lettuce fields.

[Waffdon]

Looks like Waff is 2 weeks behind the rest of the UK.

Today has dawned on me how much the pub and football really makes the world go round. I slept 13 hours last night and it still feels like the longest day ever

[Yevrah]

It does indeed.

Yev will cream his pants.

I mean, I did fucking tell you all.

[Spikey M]

I love that only Eastern Europeans will do.

[Boydy]

It surely isn't a great idea to be importing a load of folk at the minute either.

[Shindig]

Do we not have people with free time to pick fruit and veg?

[Boydy]

1243998677863145473

[Shindig]

Iran following the China curve is an odd one. They looked in serious bother a couple of weeks back.

[Spikey M]

Take a load of those people that volunteered to help the NHS and stick them in the fields.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If I was in charge I'd be going out to whatever country in Africa/wherever and offering up 10,000 five year working visas, but the government today are more small-minded than that.

[Spikey M]

Iran following the China curve is an odd one. They looked in serious bother a couple of weeks back.

Authoritarians gonna Authoritarianise?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Iran's daily deaths graph looks like someone's sitting at the back of an office each day and picking a number that looks realistic but not too bad.

[Yevrah]

Iran's daily deaths graph looks like someone's sitting at the back of an office each day and picking a number that looks realistic but not too bad.

That's definitely the case. Sure I read somewhere that the actual figure is 5x what they're posting.

[phonics]

If I was in charge I'd be going out to whatever country in Africa/wherever and offering up 10,000 five year working visas, but the government today are more small-minded than that.

My dealer is from Gambia, it's massively spreading across that West African region but they don't have the facilities/testing to work out how bad the problem is or the governmental structure to act upon it.

He says it's absolutely raging across Senegal and the reason they don't have the death count others do is because they're saying people died of the underlying condition not the corona.

[Magic]

A sanctioned Iran dealing with this lol. No chance. Stubborn cunts.

[Don]

I mean the explanation for why we're with those elites is simple, our culture places more value on hygiene than you filthy caucasians. Plus we don't even need to hoard toilet roll so that frees up a lot of resources.

[Yevrah]

An infant has died from it in the US.

[phonics]

Germany pretending they’re doing better than everyone else by counting the statistics differently than literally every country in the world is ridiculous.

[Yevrah]

Germany pretending they’re doing better than everyone else by counting the statistics differently than literally every country in the world is ridiculous.

What is it that they're doing/not doing?

[Yevrah]

Germany pretending they’re doing better than everyone else by counting the statistics differently than literally every country in the world is ridiculous.

What is it that they're doing/not doing?

[Magic]

The bairns mum is an admin worker in our local hospital. They're being re-deployed as '?'. They find out on Monday. I have my daughter all next week, so this could be a fucking grim scenario unfolding for us.

[ScousePig]

https://news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-why-germany-has-such-a-low-covid-19-death-rate-11964051

This explains Germany's data a bit more.

[Waffdon]

The bairns mum is an admin worker in our local hospital. They're being re-deployed as '?'. They find out on Monday. I have my daughter all next week, so this could be a fucking grim scenario unfolding for us.

SHE’S TURNED THE WEAN AGAINST ME

xxx

[phonics]

What is it that they're doing/not doing?

They’re saying they died of the underlying issue not corona. So if you had lung cancer you died of that not corona. Meaning they have 200 deaths to the UKs 1000 despite having more than twice as many confirmed cases.

[Yevrah]

That is naughty.

[Spikey M]

They’re saying they died of the underlying issue not corona. So if you had lung cancer you died of that not corona. Meaning they have 200 deaths to the UKs 1000 despite having more than twice as many confirmed cases.

Spikey Murkel.


On the 2nd point, what else are they meant to do?

Cause of Death: MURDER... but, look at those cholesterol levels. Stick it down as heart disease.

[Magic]

https://youtu.be/n3v_aUQa6NU

For you Yevrah

[Don]

Yo, serious props to our boy John Arne, that league table ting has got traction on my whatsapp, get it live on a dedicated Twitter account and let's flood this gaff with nurses.

[bruhnaldo]

Did i miss the latest update? Fuck I know we are in the Corona League places by now

[niko_cee]

They’re saying they died of the underlying issue not corona. So if you had lung cancer you died of that not corona. Meaning they have 200 deaths to the UKs 1000 despite having more than twice as many confirmed cases.

We, on the other hand, count people who are receiving palliative end of life care as having been done in by the virus.

There's probably a sane middle ground to be worked out when the dealin's done.

[Bernanke]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EUIid4IXkAEpGdE?format=jpg&name=4096x4096

[Pepe]

Went to Walmart tonight. Found an 18 pack of toilet paper. :cool:

[phonics]

I've already had to deal with this as this DeSanctis asshole has contributed to Florida becoming a worldwide HIV hotspot. Genuinely one of the biggest 'being a complete dumbass/amount of power' combination in American politics. He's going to get so many people killed.

1243990179557359616

[John Arne]

Yo, serious props to our boy John Arne, that league table ting has got traction on my whatsapp, get it live on a dedicated Twitter account and let's flood this gaff with nurses.

On it....

[Giggles]

The Mail is some operation.


1244079595823026176

[niko_cee]

It would be unlike Barnier to give anything without some sort of quid pro quo.

[niko_cee]

All this talk of Lombardy
It's getting me down my love
Like a man in a gown, waiting to drown
Covid is going round

And I hope you're thinking of him
As they ventilate his lungs
'Cos intervention works
It don't make him worse
At least fifty percent of the time (https://www.icnarc.org/About/Latest-News/2020/03/27/Report-On-775-Patients-Critically-Ill-With-Covid-19)

[Magic]

600 deaths for America?

[Jimmy Floyd]

America is going down in flames.

[Magic]

They've ran out of ventilators already in NYC.

[Magic]

2 days from now that will be 1000 per day. That shits on the most negative outcome in that link video I posted that said we're looking at 3k deaths a day by 2 weeks. That may even be 6-8k per day in 2 weeks time. FUCK.

[Spikey M]

Not quarentining New York is insanity.

[Bernanke]

The US is easily gonna reach a 9/11 per day in dead.

[Yevrah]

They'll start frigging the figures soon I should imagine.

[Foe]

How does it relate to other deaths in America?

What’s the number of homicide deaths per day/year across America?

Big metropolis are fucked if strong action isn’t taken. As much as I hate this lockdown, and think it’s a tad OTT for rural populations it’s definitely the way forward for urban populations.

[Shindig]

Not quarentining New York is insanity.

They should do it but the amount of gun-owning FREEDOM nuts would turn it into a massacre. Increased murder rate + Covid deaths would be erm .... terrible.

Foe - The first number I can pull up is 7,452 a day. So that plus Covid could be three 9/11s a day.

[niko_cee]

New York's not really the native habitat of the gun-owning freedom nut, is it?

[Shindig]

Technically, America as a whole isn't. But the one that REALLY BELIEVES IN FREEDOM will have an AR-16 and a sidearm.

[bruhnaldo]

I've already had to deal with this as this DeSanctis asshole has contributed to Florida becoming a worldwide HIV hotspot. Genuinely one of the biggest 'being a complete dumbass/amount of power' combination in American politics. He's going to get so many people killed.

1243990179557359616

Wait a fuckin minute you live here ?

[niko_cee]

They'll all be gleefully ensconced in their re-purposed nuclear silos (http://survivalcondo.com/).

[Shindig]

Actually, scrap the idea of a quarantined NYC becoming a murder universe. Everyone would be indoors. Shut it down, Trump.

[Yevrah]

That Penthouse condo looks amazing.

[Magic]

How does it relate to other deaths in America?

What’s the number of homicide deaths per day/year across America?

Big metropolis are fucked if strong action isn’t taken. As much as I hate this lockdown, and think it’s a tad OTT for rural populations it’s definitely the way forward for urban populations.

Heart disease kills around 1.8k per day.

[Boydy]

My cousins' nan (i.e. not the one that we have in common) died this morning. She was in a nursing home after a recent fall at home and spell in hospital. She was taken to hospital last night with pneumonia. Test has been done but no results yet.

Shit's getting real.

[Yevrah]

A doctor was just on Sky News saying she's seeing more and more 30 to 40 year olds being admitted, which could be a move to get people to stay at home, but assuming it's true, we're all at risk too.

Lovely stuff.

[Magic]

A doctor was just on Sky News saying she's seeing more and more 30 to 40 year olds being admitted, which could be a move to get people to stay at home, but assuming it's true, we're all at risk too.

Lovely stuff.

But they'll have UNDERLYING HEALTH CONDITIONS so we can still do what we want.

[Yevrah]

But they'll have UNDERLYING HEALTH CONDITIONS so we can still do what we want.

Apparently they didn't. Missed that vital bit of information. Whoops.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It seems to ravage old/ill people and then for others it's a lucky dip. Tremendous.

Maybe now would be the time to explain the concept of call forwarding to my boss. Oh wait, I already did that a week ago. But they charge the company to do it per call, so I'm still going in to the office tomorrow.

[Magic]

Apparently they didn't. Missed that vital bit of information. Whoops.

I bet there's loads of strains of it, and it's fuck all to do with your immune system or health.

[Giggles]

A doctor was just on Sky News saying she's seeing more and more 30 to 40 year olds being admitted, which could be a move to get people to stay at home, but assuming it's true, we're all at risk too.

Lovely stuff.

Opinions and stories are all pointless at this stage. There could easily be someone on BBC in an hour saying very few 30 and 40 year olds are being admitted. Too many people desperate for the 5 minutes of being heard.

[Spikey M]

They should do it but the amount of gun-owning FREEDOM nuts would turn it into a massacre. Increased murder rate + Covid deaths would be erm .... terrible.

Foe - The first number I can pull up is 7,452 a day. So that plus Covid could be three 9/11s a day.

The gun nuts aren't in New York. Not really, anyway. New York would take to a lockdown no worse than London would. Incestville, Alabama - you're gonna have a problem.

[Kikó]

I really hope this country doesn't forget the 4-6 weeks of complete inaction by the government when this is all done.

I also hope someone is scrutinising these Dyson deals who conveniently is a party donar. Absolute money grab as usual.

[Vercetti]

I think it was last week, possibly the week before, that I read about flights still landing here from Rome, Beijing and God knows where else. Just seems insane, to me.

Magic can't go out dogging, but someone can waltz through Heathrow having just devoured a side order of bat arseholes.

[Shindig]

It's all been a bit 'Why worry about something that's not going to happen?'. China ignored it, Europe left it as a Chinese problem, etc.

[John Arne]

Covid Death per 1m Population Top 2 Divisions

Premier League: Italy death rate x4.4 of 3rd place Netherlands. Western EU nations continue to dominate, Asia countries keep dropping.
Championship: Panama NE straight into 6th, Japan drop 5. Giants Russia, India and Pakistan looming large. Pepe's Mexico make their debut in 18th. Don

https://gyazo.com/2d43527633b0eb6efa54826f0a78da2b.jpeg

https://gyazo.com/d66fa5329c1fc585617430cc346ec24c.jpeg

[Don]

Top work. Someone get the TTH sponsored twitter account up with these.

[Giggles]

You’d imagine any right thinking person would tear it apart for having the soccer league colour codings to lol at the body count.

[Don]

We're not looking to attract the Twitter lefties, we're here for irreverent bishes. Big booty ones.

[Lewis]

It's only 209 today, so we're still on for Sports Direct tomorrow.

[Lofty]

Big booty bishes and statistical league tables, together at last.

[Disco]

I must have missed how those are put together, what dictates who is in which 'division'?

[Don]

Total cases.

[Don]

Return flights to Stockholm are about £100 for next weekend if anyone fancies some normality and a sesh.

[Lewis]

John Arne is a total case.

[Pepe]

I live in 'gun toting US', we even get second amendment rallies and shit, and when the governor suggested that all non-essential businesses close, they all went ahead and did. I don't think that the LOCKDOWN would be nearly as bad as many claim it would be. I mean, of course you would find some communities TAKING A STAND or whatever, but most people would just get on with it.

I just hope New Yorkers don't decide to flee this way, I'm only three hours away. Lock them in, the cunts.

[Spikey M]

Kate McCann telling people to stay home is top value.

[niko_cee]

The BBC live reporting thing is in full-on pisstake mode today:


15:19

Plane crashes in the Philippines

We're not sure if this is coronavirus related or not yet, but a plane has crashed at Manila's main airport in the Philippines.

Local media reports say the plane was heading for Japan and was carrying medical personnel and a patient.

Richard Gordon, chairman of the Philippine Red Cross, confirmed his fire and medic teams had been dispatched to the scene.

He said the plane exploded as it was taking off from the runway.

The plane was carrying eight passengers including medical staff, flight crew and a patient along with their companion, he added.

We'll bring you more updates as we get them.

:cab:

8 more for the death toll.

[Giggles]

We're not sure if this is coronavirus related or not yet

What? Do they think patients explode now?

[SincereTheRebel]

Covid Death per 1m Population Top 2 Divisions

Premier League: Italy death rate x4.4 of 3rd place Netherlands. Western EU nations continue to dominate, Asia countries keep dropping.
Championship: Panama NE straight into 6th, Japan drop 5. Giants Russia, India and Pakistan looming large. Pepe's Mexico make their debut in 18th. Don

https://gyazo.com/2d43527633b0eb6efa54826f0a78da2b.jpeg

https://gyazo.com/d66fa5329c1fc585617430cc346ec24c.jpeg

How are teams determined if they make the prem or the championship?

When is relegation and promotion sorted?

[Mellberg]

Division by total cases. Position in division by deaths by 1m population. Stops Vatican City or wherever from topping the table.

[Adramelch]

A doctor was just on Sky News saying she's seeing more and more 30 to 40 year olds being admitted, which could be a move to get people to stay at home, but assuming it's true, we're all at risk too.

Lovely stuff.

You'd think that would be something that we'd have already learned from China, Italy, Spain and the likes right?

[Shindig]

Cuomo's bar chart party is cool. ICU admissions, discharges, etc.

[Adramelch]

Hospital and ICU admissions are the key here. They are the metric that really shows how the virus is progressing and how well the quarantine works. New case numbers are "contaminated" (for lack of a much much better word) by increased testing and death numbers just show the past in a sense.

[phonics]

Wait a fuckin minute you live here ?

No I work in HIV.

[bruhnaldo]

No I work in HIV.

oh fuck yea i know South Florida is one of the major hot spots for infections unfortunately.

DeSantis sucks.

[bruhnaldo]

I'd like to suggest mybe we do promotion relegation every Friday, that could be interesting mybe?

[Don]

Bruh, don't start meddling with a winning formula. I got gash absolutely frothing wanting to taste JA's piece here.

Also, i've just woke up from a four hour nap (cause I'd had brekkie so my day was over innit) in that foul mood to see us being dripfed the likelihood of a six month lockdown? Fuck all of you.

[Lewis]

'He's cracking up, he's cracking up, he's cracking...'

[Yevrah]

Look Don, you'd cancelled the season ticket, so don't shit the bed just because someone's given you a dose of real talk.

[John]

The first hint of that was about a week ago, with the announcement that MOTs were having six months added to their validity.

[Don]

I really would be absolutely balls-deep in the David Icke material and theories, lolling my face off at all you abiding sheep if it wasn't for the loss of smell/taste business. I might be able to keep a lid on things if that shit sorts itself out soon but currently, I've had too many of my passions and pursuits taken away from me at once to cope.

[Manc]

"Don't be fooled by the stats that I got, I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the self isolated block".

[Yevrah]

You're posting on a Championship Manager forum for fuck's sake. Pissing time away indoors is something that comes naturally - we've all been preparing ourselves for this moment for decades without realising it.

You'll cope.

[Lewis]

Sorting the men from the 'Ooo I'm an introvert me' cunt boys.

[Alex]

The first hint of that was about a week ago, with the announcement that MOTs were having six months added to their validity.

Mine was due today. You qualify for the exemption from tomorrow onwards. :moop:

It hasn't been done either. I'm usually vaguely aware of when it's due, but I forgot all about it in the midst of this shit. I might just declare the fucker off-road for a bit. I can't see myself needing it for a while.

[phonics]

Sorting the men from the 'Ooo I'm an introvert me' cunt boys.

This whole things been an eye opener for me. Always thought I was anti-social, turns out I'm social and just hate alot of people.

[Don]

Anti-social :D we're not fucking unhinged, we're just a bunch of introverts and that doesn't mean we go against the grain of nature and can go without human contact.

[Giggles]

Do what you’re told and stay in and shut the fuck up.

[Shindig]

If Boris said that, we'd be sorted.

[Giggles]

Nice.

1244346535036571651

[Shindig]

He had a lot of drink taken at the time and told gardaí afterwards that it was a big joke. The case will come before the court for mention on April 1st.

Because you do, don't you. :D

[Mike]

Work have had to change the plan of everyone doing a day a week to doing a week in, a week from home and two off. I’m in all next week, 11-5. Sucks.

[Giggles]

Should be a law passed so they can knock the absolute bollocks out of him and leave him up the mountains.

[Raoul Duke]

Harsh on Mike there

[Giggles]

Either or.

[Mike]

I’ve suggested I try teach my cat her times tables when working from home, they haven’t gone for it, so it’s a bunch of online training.
The two weeks is to cover for the Easter holidays which should start tomorrow.

[Bob Sacamano]

https://i.imgur.com/YnQeT8p.jpg

1243916027932614660

:facepalm:

[Shindig]

What an eejit. Out of interest, I decided to see what flights are departing from Newcastle nowadays. KLM seem to operate the only flight out to Amsterdam at 10:30am. All the domestic ones are cancelled for the time being.

[mo]

Just checking Mike but you know they can't direct you to work in the Easter hols? It's a volunteer basis only. Props if you did volunteer. Also that rota system makes waaaay more sense. Our school adopted that policy after extensive research and modelling provided by a teacher, and now they've gone back to people doing odd days here and there (therefore risking infecting a greater proportion of the staff body in a shorter time frame.

[Don]

Seems primed for that Man Utd move, the fucking dirty cunt :harold:

[Giggles]

Yeah, you can have him.

[Mike]

Just checking Mike but you know they can't direct you to work in the Easter hols? It's a volunteer basis only. Props if you did volunteer. Also that rota system makes waaaay more sense. Our school adopted that policy after extensive research and modelling provided by a teacher, and now they've gone back to people doing odd days here and there (therefore risking infecting a greater proportion of the staff body in a shorter time frame.
Ooh, I didn’t know that, just got an email saying we had been told to stay open by the council. I enjoyed being in Friday, and don’t mind going in next week, just not pleased with the 5pm finish, half the staff in are doing 8-2 rather than 11-5 and I’d much rather start early. Means I can have a beer with a film tonight though.

[Giggles]

Long way off the 15000 predicted confirmed cases by the end of March. Seems to be a big mistake saying that number.

1244361232808804352

[Mellberg]

Hopefully done himself out of a move there :eyemouth:

[Giggles]

Mike or the Lord?

[ScousePig]

I think any rotas that are made for school staff are subject to change. I'm not in next week except briefly tomorrow morning, but if anyone has to stay home it will change. We've also gone from 30 odd kids last Monday to teen figures, and we might not even make double figures next week.

[Mellberg]

Mike or the Lord?

Jack Grealish

[Giggles]

Jaysus there was a story on the news there about a man that died from this there. A healthy enough looking 78 year old with some complications. No horrific death (sorry Yev) but just the daughter saying that her and the mother had to sit 6 foot away as he died, his sons had to say goodbye over FaceTime, masks and gloves in a ten minute funeral they all couldn’t go to, and none of them have been allowed see each other since. Be bad enough to lose a husband/father but it must be absolutely be mental to wrap the head around all that too

[Lofty]

Jack Grealish

Supposedly had a big party too so might not be moving but might not be playing either when the dust settles.

[Lewis]

That hearing aid beige Range Rover is the worst thing about it. The party and the drink driving sounds like the sort of Character Old Trafford has been lacking these past few years.

[niko_cee]

Speaking of shitey coloured cars (https://uk.motor1.com/news/406382/roy-keane-aston-martin-up-for-grabs/)

Maybe you're onto something.

[Don]

This NHS surgeon that died was an ENT specialist. I ain't read the specifics so I'll just go right ahead and assume it's more evidence against my trademarked theory that this shit is trapped and accumulates in your sinus like shit in a straw and is dislodged/released at some stage to varying degrees. I won't be taking questions on this matter.

Rainman on now. Let's do this.

[Lewis]

Speaking of shitey coloured cars (https://uk.motor1.com/news/406382/roy-keane-aston-martin-up-for-grabs/)

Maybe you're onto something.

Jewish racing gold, the crap engine, the crap gearbox... If it's 1998 as well he presumably bought it off a lot somewhere like that, rather than speccing it that badly himself. It shows a distinct lack of Quality and Character.

'A gold Aston Martin? Do me a favour.'

[Bernanke]

https://i.imgur.com/EFknw5f.jpg

The US is such a fucking mess.

[Shindig]

You could pull similar graphs for half a dozen places right now. We just had 500 deaths in a week.

[phonics]

1244554527602282496
https://i1.wp.com/metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/RunDomRun-aaf4.gif

[Jimmy Floyd]

All my uncles/aunts/cousins that live in London have it or have had. I haven't heard that any friends there do but god knows if they'd tell me. London is just a plague pit and every large city will be the same.

[Spikey M]

I feel really fucking low today. All I have done for a week is work, deal with 2 bored children, and stare at these fucking walls. No holiday, no day trips, even a walk to the shop risks a stop and search for non-essentials. Week 1. WEEK FUCKING 1 has done me in. Potentially 6 months of this shit.

[SvN]

I've been doing two walks per day with the family (inc dog), just 10 minutes around the block. It's been fairly quiet, and everyone we encounter is taking it seriously enough to cross the road if they end up on the same side of the pavement as someone. I can't imagine just not going out at all.

[Mike]

Got ready for work, was about to set off and my boss phoned, only 8 kids today, so didn’t need me in. Said he’ll sort out what days I’m in and see me later in the week.
Was all ready for going out so had my government approved hour of outside time with a walk around the park, was really quiet. Nipped the shop on the way back and they had no meat, asked someone if they knew when it was in “we just got it delivered, give me 5 mins”
Only wanted chicken for tea, for two packs!

Bumped in my my elderly neighbour in my building (he was safely behind the door to his floor). He told me how much he missed the pub and listed all the ones he goes, poor guy.

[Mike]

What an exciting post eh! You’re welcome lads.

[SincereTheRebel]

What was it like during the war? Has anyone been part of one?

[Spikey M]

Not a good one.

[Offshore Toon]

Lockdown's alright tbh.

[Jimmy Floyd]

In the office today to answer the phones. The phone has rung once.

My team of three is on an AABCC rotation to cover the week (I'm A). B, on Teams, is telling us he's frightened to leave his home for any reason (hasn't even shopped for a week, eking out his remaining tins). I reckon he's going to go rogue and refuse to do his shift in. That will be good.

[SvN]

If you're literally just answering phones, why aren't they set up to divert to your mobile so you can work from home? That's insanity.

[Boydy]

My cousins' nan (i.e. not the one that we have in common) died this morning. She was in a nursing home after a recent fall at home and spell in hospital. She was taken to hospital last night with pneumonia. Test has been done but no results yet.

Shit's getting real.
Test was negative so at least they get to have a small funeral.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If you're literally just answering phones, why aren't they set up to divert to your mobile so you can work from home? That's insanity.

I suggested this to MD a week ago. The answer was no because there's a charge for call diversion. I said you can even put my mobile on the company website if you really have to, or change the switchboard message to read it out. Nothing.

[Yevrah]

Is there an official line or something that this shit can be reported to?

[Magic]

I suggested this to MD a week ago. The answer was no because there's a charge for call diversion. I said you can even put my mobile on the company website if you really have to, or change the switchboard message to read it out. Nothing.

That is true if you've got the old PSTN fixed line.

Do you want a hosted offering? Oh no wait I can't sell anything because I'm furloughed lolol.

[Spikey M]

Go back to the Koreans Jim. Fucking hell.

[Lee]

So many employers are being unbelievably backwards. It’s unreal.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I reckon the grim reaper will soon be along with his furlough notice so I can't really be bothered doing anything more, I've tried my best.

[Boydy]

Unionise, Jimmy.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Two guys who came into work today car shared. :D

One the most grippit man on the planet, the other a pure nihilist.

[Boydy]

What the hell is 'grippit'?

[ScousePig]

Got ready for work, was about to set off and my boss phoned, only 8 kids today, so didn’t need me in. Said he’ll sort out what days I’m in and see me later in the week.
Was all ready for going out so had my government approved hour of outside time with a walk around the park, was really quiet. Nipped the shop on the way back and they had no meat, asked someone if they knew when it was in “we just got it delivered, give me 5 mins”
Only wanted chicken for tea, for two packs!

Bumped in my my elderly neighbour in my building (he was safely behind the door to his floor). He told me how much he missed the pub and listed all the ones he goes, poor guy.

Being in all week, whilst logical in a sense, never really seemed realistic to me.

I've been in this morning to meet with the head about remote learning, and we had 11 kids in school.

As for the remote learning, Google Classroom is a no go at the moment as it requires all kids to have a school domain email address, so we're going to trial Seesaw instead.

[Spikey M]

What the hell is 'grippit'?

Google has a few interpretations, but going from context I'm assuming it means religious.

[Lewis]

The people who thought Boris Johnson was faking his diagnosis are in bits over Deadly Dom. Has he got it? Is he faking it too? It's like Bash at the Beach 2000.

[Lewis]

Fuck. The Montreal Flujob.

[Shindig]

Jab :dc:

[Lewis]

This is what community solidarity looks like.

[Disco]

Chris 'The Whit-Man' Whitty.

[Spikey M]

Dom 'The Stratman' Cummings doesn't work, but we'll roll with it.

Although he'd have to be the Strat-Make Kid, really.

[Disco]

The Dom-dertaker.

[Waffdon]

Google has a few interpretations, but going from context I'm assuming it means religious.

I’ve only heard it meaning that you’re a tight bastard

[Spikey M]

Then I have no idea why that anecdote was, well, an anecdote?

[Serj]

From Wednesday onwards, wearing a mask will be mandatory in Austrian supermarkets. John Arne would be proud.

[John Arne]

From Wednesday onwards, wearing a mask will be mandatory in Austrian supermarkets. John Arne would be proud.

https://gyazo.com/220b131cfe109d51a9759e7d4cca9fa0.jpeg

[Spikey M]

From Wednesday onwards, wearing a mask will be mandatory in Austrian supermarkets. John Arne would be proud.

Are you calling him ugly?

[Serj]

:D Basically.

I was more referring to the Asiatisation of our measures.

I've heard so much conflicting information about the effectiveness of medical masks that I find it hard to have an opinion either way. Shopping will be quite a bizarre experience in any case.

[Manc]

A casual 159 today.

[Spikey M]

Cases are dropping. Deaths are dropping. Normal life by next week I reckon.

[Manc]

Next week? Don't be so pessimistic.

[Spikey M]

Cautiously pessimistic.

[Don]

Just at my local Waitrose, last shopping trip was last week (real nice in and out at Lidl jobbie) and Jesus, it's literally 28 Days Later scenes. How the fuck have all these MK dwellers got so many face masks and the social dostancing's got the queue round the car park. It's movin quick, report about stock levels to come. Just seen thw tickest ting in existence in the MK postcode though. White essex looking ting too. Fuuuuuck arrrf. Reporting out, Don.

[Disco]

It was the same here on Saturday, the queue looked biblical but there was only about 20 people in it and I was in within 10/15 minutes.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Google has a few interpretations, but going from context I'm assuming it means religious.

Not that much on google but it means tight-fisted.

[phonics]

A mate is organizing social distancing beers in the local park :drool:

My first piece of human contact in nearly a month.