Coronavirus Death Thread

[John]

Have you never tried clippers with no attachments on?

It's just razor burn/minor scratches similar to using a normal razor.

I shave my head with naked clippers all the time and have never once cut myself.

[Giggles]

I don’t think you could cut yourself with a clippers even if you tried? I normally cut mine with that and am haven’t done it once.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I shave my head with naked clippers all the time and have never once cut myself.

I guess I'm just shit at using them then.

[John]

I don’t think you could cut yourself with a clippers even if you tried? I normally cut mine with that and am haven’t done it once.

You'd need to be digging them into your scalp the wrong way round or catching yourself with the corners.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's one of these:

https://dealmaniauk.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/Pic-5-Remington-Quick-Cut-Mens-Hair-Clipper-Trimmer-Haircut-Deal-Mania.jpg

So it might be me getting caught by the corners.

[Spikey M]

Have you never tried clippers with no attachments on?

It's just razor burn/minor scratches similar to using a normal razor.

Only every morning for 5 months.

[Foe]

Must be easy policing right now. The streets are empty and the amount of absolute dodgers that just stand out like a sore thumb is unbelievable.

If you saw it on a Truman show esque camera you’d assume the whole world was corrupted with a drug rather than a virus.

Seems to be a real spike in petty theft too since the shops are closed and they’re resorting to thieving even more bikes and breaking into cars in supermarket car parks.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Only every morning for 5 months.

Sorry, didn't realise I was speaking to an expert.

[Vercetti]

Doing your whole head in three passes :drool:

[bruhnaldo]

How?

[ScousePig]

I managed a reasonably successful haircut a couple of weeks ago, where I shaved the back and sides but more or less left the top. It didn't blend well but other than that I was happy enough.

Unfortunately I tried to go over the top today and I've ended up having to shave it to 16mm again. That's more or less how I had it pre-lockdown, but I'd got used to the slightly longer on top version. I made a mess of one of the corners at the front too where it grows slightly odd, so there's a bit of a chunk cut out.

[Spikey M]

Doing your whole head in three passes :drool:

Why would I go over it more than once?

[bruhnaldo]

Nah man he's saying full coverage in 3 stripes like adidas.

[Spikey M]

Oh right cheers yeah

[Disco]

:D

[bruhnaldo]

Sigh.

[Waffdon]

That health minister Piers Morgan donned is quite decent looking, you know. Bet she’s a right dirty too

[Queenslander]

Poor buggers.
"The Ruby Princess, which has been responsible for hundreds of coronavirus infections and more than 20 deaths is set to depart Port Kembla in Illawarra."

The Ruby Princess contributed to 10% of cases nationally.

[Shindig]

But the virus is re-emerging in parts of the north, where the city of Harbin is under restrictions. One hospital there has closed after an 87-year-old man who had visited was diagnosed with the virus - he’d unknowingly infected 78 other people.

That's madness.

[Kikó]

Must be easy policing right now. The streets are empty and the amount of absolute dodgers that just stand out like a sore thumb is unbelievable.

If you saw it on a Truman show esque camera you’d assume the whole world was corrupted with a drug rather than a virus.

Seems to be a real spike in petty theft too since the shops are closed and they’re resorting to thieving even more bikes and breaking into cars in supermarket car parks.

:cab:

There are definitely more chancers about at the moment (or people are more emboldened). Police are too busy disrupting people in the park sat down than stop pick pocketing.

[Magic]

The pigs are really showing themselves to be absolute cunts up here anyway. Power hungry bully victims.

[Waffdon]

The pigs are really showing themselves to be absolute cunts up here anyway. Power hungry bully victims.

Stop running about doing your best Limmy impression then.

[John Arne]

Ate at a restaurant today :drool:

[Spikey M]

I hope it was dripping with Pangolin spunk.

[Waffdon]

Northern Ireland and Scotland to be out of lockdown before the English :drool:

[Queenslander]

The bloody teachers Union are carrying on as if they are being forced to work in a lepper colony.

[mo]

Yeah bloody coward teachers. Don't worry I'm sure your right wing journalists will join Joanna Williams in volunteering to get back in the classroom :thbup:

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/04/21/teachers-need-show-courage-get-back-classroom/?utm_content=telegraph&utm_medium=Social&utm_campaign=Echobox&utm_source=Twitter#Echobox=1587622854

[Jimmy Floyd]

If there's one profession that should be abolished, it's the columnist.

[Queenslander]

Yeah bloody coward teachers. Don't worry I'm sure your right wing journalists will join Joanna Williams in volunteering to get back in the classroom :thbup:

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/04/21/teachers-need-show-courage-get-back-classroom/?utm_content=telegraph&utm_medium=Social&utm_campaign=Echobox&utm_source=Twitter#Echobox=1587622854

It was tounge in cheek but their are a few here that have been caught saying outragous bullshit.

The State based Education system is really fucking over the teachers. Liberial WA Premier is sending them back while QLD Labor is carrying on with home learning, unless the children have parents who work, for the next 5 weeks then reasses. QLD Labor having been kicking goals this whole time working closely with the Teachers Union.

[Baz]

That health minister Piers Morgan donned is quite decent looking, you know. Bet she’s a right dirty too

Looks like she hasn't slept since 2008.

[Lofty]

A load of Arsenal players have been breaching coronavirus guidelines because of course they have.

[mo]

It was tounge in cheek but their are a few here that have been caught saying outragous bullshit.

Like what, out of interest?

[Queenslander]

Like what, out of interest?

Teachers in their 60s expected to work in the classroom. Lack of hand sanitizer and soap but that was Private Schools who are not going back anyway.

I am being unfair dickhead and these comments are in isolation and dont represent all Teachers obviously.

[Waffdon]

Looks like she hasn't slept since 2008.

She’s quite cute. Definitely takes it up the arse, the wee Tory slapper

[Don]

Thought Queenslander was calling Mo a dickhead then for a second and got excited.

Oi Giggles, i'll give ya three camels for your missus.

[Lewis]

1253300028636114944

:lol:

[Disco]

Gone.

[Yevrah]

What was it?

[Baz]

What was it?

Probably this (https://twitter.com/baz9torres/status/1211325504340410368?s=21).

[bruhnaldo]

I'm not watching a 2 minute video of your mom trying to kill a cockroach but thanks, fam.

[Spikey M]

He has a name, cuntchops.

[Ian]

Who, Baz or Gavin?

[Smjffy]

And Super Hans.

I've just finished season one of the Peep Show. It makes more sense now but still wrong. According to Google it's 17 years old...I really gotta watch TV more, I always thought it was some quiz show like HIGNFY sort of rubbish. Mark reminds me of the brief case wanker from Inbetweeners.

[bruhnaldo]

Peep Show is fuckin hilarious.*

* - at least up until the seasons I watched on netflix but I don't think I've seen the latest season(s).

[Giggles]

Thought Queenslander was calling Mo a dickhead then for a second and got excited.

Oi Giggles, i'll give ya three camels for your missus.

Sorry, she’s not 7.

[Don]

:drool:

Peep Show maintains its quality enough to warrant ensuring everyone has watched it all.

Get some of this: https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/global-development/2020/apr/23/pandemic-could-turn-back-the-clock-20-years-on-malaria-deaths-warns-who

That's almost 400K extra deaths because of the lockdown by my reckoning :D How many African deaths equate to one Caucasian death? Stick that in your fucking Zoom Pub Quizzes.

On a more personal note, I'm forgetting the old normality and am feeling supremely serene. It's hard to say until it's over and I see if I revert back to the mean or not, but this could potentially have a life changing impact on me and one that was most definitely needed. Still don't reckon I'd cope once the weather turns though.

[Spoonsky]

I'm not watching a 2 minute video of your mom trying to kill a cockroach but thanks, fam.

What if it was Irreverant, Obnoxious, Contrary and Awesome?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I once performed an intensive study on the race/deaths thing a while back and calculated that in London, and in national media terms, a white kid getting stabbed is around 50 times more tragic than a black kid getting stabbed.

Only Stephen Lawrence and Damilola Taylor have ever managed to defy this equation. I'm not really sure why, either.

[Waffdon]

Person two doors down from me apparently tested positive. She’s a carer but has been going for walks and chilling in her garden like nothing is wrong.

Madre is fuming. It’s quite funny.

Edit: though she was cutting my hair at the time of finding out and now I look like a monk. Karma for Brother Shane at laughing

[Spoonsky]

https://thehill.com/opinion/healthcare/494034-the-data-are-in-stop-the-panic-and-end-the-total-isolation

Written by Scott "Taz" Atlas, MD. He makes a pretty good case.

[Jimmy Floyd]

President Donald J. Trump says we all need to go outside because you only get infected indoors. My president.

[Shindig]

IHME have revised our total deaths projection down from 60,000 to a much more reasonable 33,000.

[Yevrah]

There seems to be general confusion over what suppressing the peak actually meant. It was designed entirely to prevent NHS capacity from being swamped and as far as I understand it we're nowhere near that - the death camp at the excel is closer to empty than it is to full.

So the peak, for now, is almost an irrelevance and we have to think about what to do next, but being mindful that whatever we do should keep us away from fucking the NHS.

Given the above and some of the points made in Spoon's article, I question why we're still in 'full' lockdown, let alone the idea that we extend it until the end of May.

[Yevrah]

IHME have revised our total deaths projection down from 60,000 to a much more reasonable 33,000.

Over what time period? It'll be higher than that before we're done.

[Shindig]

Their numbers seems to stop around August when we'll be putting up no or a single death a day.

[Spikey M]

Over what time period? It'll be higher than that before we're done.

I can only assume that's the prediction with us avoiding a second peak and having a vaccine.

[Yevrah]

I can only assume that's the prediction with us avoiding a second peak and having a vaccine.

By August? Another one to file straight in the bin then.

The care home deaths missing currently will take us a fair way towards that number alone.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What we're heading for, in this country at least, is a proxy arena of the Brexit culture wars, with the golf club tie + white van coalition wanting to come off lockdown tomorrow, and the skinny jeans + shrieking mum coalition wanting to keep it fully locked down until the year 3000.

[Shindig]

By August? Another one to file straight in the bin then.

We are trying other treatments, you know? Plasma seems to be getting some positive results.

[Ian]

What we're heading for, in this country at least, is a proxy arena of the Brexit culture wars, with the golf club tie + white van coalition wanting to come off lockdown tomorrow, and the skinny jeans + shrieking mum coalition wanting to keep it fully locked down until the year 3000.

We'll all be living underwater by then anyway.

[Spikey M]

And noncing our great, great, great Granddaughters by all accounts.

[Ian]

Ah, I didn't realise you'd read the same study I have.

[ScousePig]

It's a pretty fine study.

[Don]

There seems to be general confusion over what suppressing the peak actually meant. It was designed entirely to prevent NHS capacity from being swamped and as far as I understand it we're nowhere near that - the death camp at the excel is closer to empty than it is to full.

So the peak, for now, is almost an irrelevance and we have to think about what to do next, but being mindful that whatever we do should keep us away from fucking the NHS.

Given the above and some of the points made in Spoon's article, I question why we're still in 'full' lockdown, let alone the idea that we extend it until the end of May.

The government have now shat themselves over the incessant accusations and blame game they've lost. All thought and logic seems to have been sacrificed and the order of the day now is to chase Turkish fabrics and refute all accusations of herd immunity rather than make sensible decisions and craft a logical solution. Although in all fairness if PPE and nursing is short then I guess that's why they can't be as bold as we're wanting.

I wouldn't yet go as far as to say a full lockdown was completely unnecessary as it serves a good purpose to make sure people take this shit seriously enough for the isolation of at-risk groups to be succesful but the length and extent of this has already entered into excessive territory and shows no sign of ending any time soon.

[Yevrah]

I'm not saying full lockdown, or our version of it anyway, should end now, we just need a cohesive plan, which at some point in the not too distant future a loosening of it has to be part of.

I thought strongly that the lockdown should have happened even earlier than it did, but it's not a long term solution and we all have to accept the fact that a shitload more lives will be lost either directly or indirectly from this before we're done, whatever we choose to do.

As for the government, I don't think they've shat themselves, they just know the only way out of this until we get a vaccine applied across Britain (which will not be by September or whatever other ludicrous dates are being chucked around) is testing and tracing and we're woefully ll equipped to that at the moment.

[Andy]

Feels like they're already starting to loosen things. House building is winding back up and B&Q started to open its branches a few days ago.

Itll just be a gradual process behind the scenes rather than some huge announcement.

[Yevrah]

That's just businesses (that were entitled to be open anyway under the rules) working out how to open up safely. Mine is in the same boat.

[Don]

We discussed this weeks back but I'm still unclear. It seems more and more like the normality of old is really not going to be seen in 2020 with the stench of social distancing remaining around, I can imagine pubs and bars trying to police some fucking bizzare capacity/social distancing rules but surely that's the end for dancefloors unless they somehow get on top of testing and contact tracing sufficiently, right?

[Lewis]

I've noticed people being a bit less anal about distancing over the past couple of weeks. The queues outside shops are inching closer together, and once you're inside you might as well be shopping as normal.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It will come back, it will just take time. This next bit will be the worst as the immediate threat will be less but the stultifying boredom will be dragging on.

People ultimately need to be close to each other or else we might as well all go Jonestown and abandon the species.

[Magic]

I've completely given up on the distancing front.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There'll be no social distancing at the 2 million turnout in the streets for the behavioural scientists' open top bus parade, that's for sure.

[Waffdon]

I’m away to Asda for the first time to buy a few crates of beer and whatever else will get me twatted. Shall be fun.

[bruhnaldo]

What if it was Irreverant, Obnoxious, Contrary and Awesome?

I like this response, +1 to Utah

[Baz]

I like this response, +1 to Utah
Why?

[bruhnaldo]

It was a callback to my most recent meltdown

[Baz]

It was a callback to my most recent meltdown:confused:

It’s my “tag line” thingy on Twitter.

[bruhnaldo]

Oh damn I've had another 'mare then I thought he was doing a bit from when I listed a bunch of emotions for no fuckin reason other than to be an obnoxious dipshit.

So ANYWAYS whoops.

[Waffdon]

I’m away to Asda for the first time to buy a few crates of beer and whatever else will get me twatted. Shall be fun.

Easy peasy. Since when was it £20 for Smirnoff?

[bruhnaldo]

What did you buy for yourself?

[John]

I've noticed people being a bit less anal about distancing over the past couple of weeks. The queues outside shops are inching closer together, and once you're inside you might as well be shopping as normal.

Tesco near me is going with a full one way system, staggered checkouts, and aisles in the process of being restocked being closed completely.

[Boydy]

Tesco near me is going with a full one way system, staggered checkouts, and aisles in the process of being restocked being closed completely.

They should keep the one way system even after this is all over. And also introduce someone going round with a big stick to beat people round the backs of the legs with if they stop for too long.

[Magic]

Tesco near me is going with a full one way system, staggered checkouts, and aisles in the process of being restocked being closed completely.

And who sticks to it? Subservients and nazis.

[John]

And who sticks to it? Subservients and nazis.

The three times I've been in, just about everyone.

[Smjffy]

The small co-op where I'm at is the same. One way, marked floors and only two at a time. Everyone else lines up outside and keeps their distance but in fairness it's very smooth running. You could go there now and get much of what you need which isn't bad given it's the only shop for miles on end.

[Don]

Why is my local Waitrose out of eggs? Like surely that's just piss-poor management at this stage, no? Same with trying to buy my parents yeast for the past fortnight at every fucking store.

[Shindig]

I go against the grain. I'm not going to long way round for some frozen veg. Plus you cut in front of the queuing aisle which is a much bigger sin, apparently.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why is my local Waitrose out of eggs? Like surely that's just piss-poor management at this stage, no? Same with trying to buy my parents yeast for the past fortnight at every fucking store.

I've heard that eggs and flour are the only things running out now because everyone is baking. I mean, fuck knows why, but apparently they are. I have enough stress as it is without believing that the way out is to attempt to make my own biscuits.

[ScousePig]

It seems to be a staple activity for those with children.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why is my local Waitrose out of eggs? Like surely that's just piss-poor management at this stage, no? Same with trying to buy my parents yeast for the past fortnight at every fucking store.

I go 1-2 times a week to Sainsburys and today was the first time they had any eggs (quite a lot) and flour (a couple of small bags of self-raising).

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've heard that eggs and flour are the only things running out now because everyone is baking. I mean, fuck knows why, but apparently they are. I have enough stress as it is without believing that the way out is to attempt to make my own biscuits.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-52212760

Alex Waugh, director general of Nabim, says the issue isn't being able to mill enough flour - but the lack of capacity to pack it into small bags for retailers.

Only around 4% of UK flour is sold through shops and supermarkets, according to the association. The majority is produced in bulk and delivered in tankers or bags of more than 16kg to bakeries or other food manufacturers.

The millers can't bag it fast enough to meet demand right now.

[John]

I go against the grain. I'm not going to long way round for some frozen veg. Plus you cut in front of the queuing aisle which is a much bigger sin, apparently.

You're an almighty bellend.

[Shindig]

No, the veg aisle is literally next to the queuing aisle. The arrows tell you to cut across but the cunt watching the line fucking halts you. They've botched it, basically. And if the aisle's empty, I'll do it.

[Manc]

M&S was serene.

[Andy]

M&S was serene.

I'm full time shopping at M&S now.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The M&S near me seems to have the longest queues of angry old people outside, but that's just Surrey for you I think.

[Shindig]

You have space to breathe in Poundland. You still get crocked by three people fingering through the CDs and DVDs. Or Jimmy 8 Kids clogging the place up looking for egg cups but at least there's less people in general.

[Lewis]

This Dominic Cummings story is a good one. He's got these mongoloids on strings.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Knobhead centrist columnist twitter exploding with THIS IS BIG fury whenever he does anything is class. It ain't your world, boys and girls.

[Lewis]

It's the tension between him being an unqualified interloper and his apparent ability to sway the opinions of a room full of world-renowned eggheads that makes it, as if he's Yuri from Command & Conquer.

[Queenslander]

Thanks to Covid we had 100s of half assed last post attempts on driveways all around Australia at 6am this morning. Trust Australians to make this day about themselves and their social media mentions... One cunt in my brothers street actually set up a PA system so he could belt out his own shit house trumpet noise for for everyone in every direction. My brother was seething.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-52399385

Laura McLellan says she has never felt so humbled as when she and her team of checkout operators were told they were key workers.

The Tesco supermarket worker felt so proud that she wanted to go back in time to tell her school headmaster about the important job she was now doing during the coronavirus pandemic.

:harold:

[Boydy]

What are you :harold:ing about?

[Spikey M]

He appears to be a long time lay about lolling at someone with a job.

[Byron]

Typical benefit scrounger.

[Queenslander]

Yeah that would get your beer knocked over in Brisbane.

[Lofty]

I mean he is right to laugh in a way because they are key workers right now but this will simply facilitate their descent into obsolescence with employers of low skilled key workers contemplating how much easier automation would've made it.

[Shindig]

Someone in management will be pushing for more self-service as a way to curve infections.

[Spikey M]

There's very few jobs that couldn't be automated.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't spit on shelf-stackers as I walk past them anymore, for hygiene reasons. We all have to do our bit at a time like this.

[Smjffy]

There's very few jobs that couldn't be automated.

It's all going to go the way of the film Surrogates.

[Lofty]

There's very few jobs that couldn't be automated.

Thankfully my job relies on such illogical agreements and convoluted rules that they have an program they wheel out now and again to do work but it needs loads of manual interventions because it's shite.

[Shindig]

My job relies on the DWP's inherent distrust of machines.

[Spikey M]

In my last job we had an Excel macro we ran every week that told us what offenders were in receipt of benefits. It wasn't ideal, as it would throw up a 'management check' every 100 searches, but it converted about a weeks worth of work into a 2 hour macro process. That was done on the DWP's portal.

Embrace your machine overlords, Shinners.

[Shindig]

Hey, our management fucking loves machine learning. They just haven't managed to do it in a very DWP-approved way.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This suggestion by the Mail that we will soon be allowed to pick other 10 people we are allowed to see is worse than lockdown. Far worse.

[Yevrah]

This suggestion by the Mail that we will soon be allowed to pick other 10 people we are allowed to see is worse than lockdown. Far worse.

I've only just seen it from your post, but it sounds retarded and unworkable too.

[Spikey M]

I don't think I could name 10 people I want to see.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The main strategy for government policy formation at the moment seems to be running wacky ideas up the Twitter flagpole and seeing if they make people throb through the temple or the trousers.

It would be nice to have some actual decision-making.

[John Arne]

Good day today... Coffee at the small coffee shop first thing, then off outside the city for work. Back in the afternoon for some lunch at a Japanese place. Then met the missus at the mall where we spunked an inordinate amount of money on a new washing machine. Stopped for some Pho on the way home. Off to the pub for a cold beer tomorrow night
#NoMoreLockdown

[Shindig]

I err ... thought our death numbers usually went down on a weekend. :|

[Adramelch]

I err ... thought our death numbers usually went down on a weekend. :|

It's Sunday and Monday reports that are lagging.

[John]

Good day today... Coffee at the small coffee shop first thing, then off outside the city for work. Back in the afternoon for some lunch at a Japanese place. Then met the missus at the mall where we spunked an inordinate amount of money on a new washing machine. Stopped for some Pho on the way home. Off to the pub for a cold beer tomorrow night
#NoMoreLockdown

I know it goes against your essential nature, but stop being a smug twat.

[Lee]

I err ... thought our death numbers usually went down on a weekend. :|

Today is the lowest Saturday toll for at least three weeks. And quite a few of the deaths were old ones. It’s on the way down now and has been for nearly three weeks.

[Mellberg]

All I need to hear. Open up the beer gardens.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's not often I say this, but I could really do with the sun fucking off behind some clouds/rain. It's demoralising.

[niko_cee]

Weather's going to be shit(ter) next week I believe.

[Giggles]

I want something to keep the little scrotes from playing football outside my house. Rain would be great.

[Foe]

One of my pals in the highlands has been posting pictures and videos of him pissing about with a football in his back garden and it’s thoroughly peeved me. It’s been shit weather here, I have no garden and it’s been bloody 17c up there.

[Shindig]

The sun's made my walks home from work feel really good, to be fair.

[Revolution]

I always took the virus seriously but I can now safely say you dont want this shit.

My neighbour started feeling rough two days ago. Took a turn for worse last night and woke up gasping for air.

Then randomly passed out. Then lost feeling in his legs. Now in ICU fighting for his life.

[Baz]

I always took the virus seriously but I can now safely say you dont want this shit.

My neighbour started feeling rough two days ago. Took a turn for worse last night and woke up gasping for air.

Then randomly passed out. Then lost feeling in his legs. Now in ICU fighting for his life.
How olds he? Has he ever smoked? Is he overweight? Does he have diabetes?

[Foe]

Age sex location?

[Foe]

Answer baz’s questions first then let us know your details as per my request.

[Revolution]

How olds he? Has he ever smoked? Is he overweight? Does he have diabetes?

Mid 50's. Quit at 30 ish. A little bit but not alarmingly. No.

[Baz]

Okay. I still consider myself very safe then.

Sorry for your loss.

[Revolution]

I'm practically fucked I think. Well no doubt I'm going to catch it now.

[Foe]

If you did, what’s your odds on beating it?

You got any underlying issues that would put you in trouble?

[Magic]

If you did, what’s your odds on beating it?

You got any underlying issues that would put you in trouble?

Lol. This is LR remember.

[Revolution]

I think I might probably get it because I went round to help him. But I washed my hands after and shit and he didn't have a cough. Chucked all my clothes in the bin.

If I get it, I'm pretty sure I'd be fine but I do have underlying health conditions.

[Pepe]

Got my Tronald bucks today. :drool:

I thought that as a foreigner I couldn't get anything, yet here we are. How sending someone that still has his job a check for $2400 is a good idea, I do not know, but I will take it. Free monies. :drool:

[Spikey M]

Lend us a tenner la

[Revolution]

Virus attacking his spine. Emergency operation at 9am to remove part of his spine. Wow.

[Bam]

I do have underlying health conditions.

Being mental isn't a underlying health condition, you'll be fine.

[niko_cee]

Did I read rightly the other day that there have only been 150 odd deaths of people under 40 from this in the UK? Out of presumably hundreds of thousands of cases/infections.

[Spikey M]

If the answer is yes then operation Herd Immunity should begin immediately.

[Shindig]

Up to the 10th of April, 50 females and 76 males under 45 years of age died to Covid. England and Wales only.

[Spikey M]

Trump has it right.

[Yevrah]

That is of course because we locked down and were able to give everyone a bed who needed one.

[Spikey M]

I'll take the risk. I want a Bigmac.

[Yevrah]

As I said on the last couple of pages, we need to be looking at and doing next steps now.

[Spikey M]

Fuck steps. I'm going pub with Waff.

[Smjffy]

I still don't see where you're expecting these pubs to be.

[Giggles]

As I said on the last couple of pages, we need to be looking at and doing next steps now.

Not sure what you’re like there but here things are nearly back to normal, everyone is just ignoring the restrictions altogether and the authorities have given up on it. Knew it was going to happen the first sign of numbers going down because idiots can’t see that numbers are lower than predicted because of the restrictions.

[Yevrah]

Not sure what you’re like there but here things are nearly back to normal, everyone is just ignoring the restrictions altogether and the authorities have given up on it. Knew it was going to happen the first sign of numbers going down because idiots can’t see that numbers are lower than predicted because of the restrictions.

I don't go out much and only then a few metres down my road, so it's hard to know how well it's being observed. Job was done though, we didn't breach NHS capacity, so we need to look at other options now.

[Giggles]

You haven’t yet anyway. Relax it all and it’s bound to happen, the virus hasn’t gone away.

[Don]

Having said that, there's no sign of any camel humped new cases charts for any country, is there? At best I'm looking at Japan and Singapore who seem to be keeping a degree of momentum but where them juicy second waves at?

[mugbull]

Having said that, there's no sign of any camel humped new cases charts for any country, is there? At best I'm looking at Japan and Singapore who seem to be keeping a degree of momentum but where them juicy second waves at?

It's too early to see, but the hump will be here in a couple weeks. Gonna go full Bactrian on this one. For once I agree with the potato man.

[Yevrah]

You haven’t yet anyway. Relax it all and it’s bound to happen, the virus hasn’t gone away.

What do you think should happen now then?

[Giggles]

Harder restrictions.

[Yevrah]

Having said that, there's no sign of any camel humped new cases charts for any country, is there? At best I'm looking at Japan and Singapore who seem to be keeping a degree of momentum but where them juicy second waves at?

Japan are lying about their numbers anyway. No way their system is struggling with only 200 deaths.

[Yevrah]

Harder restrictions.

For how long? Until a vaccine is found?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can imagine my mate Kido going around hospitals doing that sneer thing and then ordering anyone in ICU shot so they didn't die of the virus.

[Giggles]

For how long? Until a vaccine is found?

Keep going in stages and decide at each point.

At the very least the current ones need to be extended with a big focus on enforcement this time round.

[Yevrah]

Keep going in stages and decide at each point.

At the very least the current ones need to be extended with a big focus on enforcement this time round.

How long are the stages? Decide based on what?

[Manc]

Flouting is on the rise.

[Giggles]

How long are the stages? Decide based on what?

I’m not the one to make those decisions. Thinking you can open up because the hospitals haven’t been crowded so far is lunacy though.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Living in a flat that looks out over a park, I haven't seen any change in flouting all month other than the odd person sunbathing on their own (the horror!)

The main increase has been in the sheer volume of incompetent cyclists on the roads. I swear I'll never slate the normal lot again.

[Don]

The Guardian had a predictable piece saying how restaurants can't economically carry out social distancing and same will no doubt go for bars and clubs. These govts need to simply work on increasing hospital capacity and testing because this can't carry on. The rebellion will occur.

[Shindig]

We'll probably carry on the lockdown 2-3 weeks longer than everyone else because that feels like the most British response. We pussyfooted over the lockdown, we'll pussyfoot the exit. We're talking about a second wave whilst we're still very much in the first, as well. Germany, Spain and Italy have eased when their cases are at the 2-3000 range. We're still wobbling around 5,000. Given how we've been locked down for a month, where are these cases coming from? Are they clusters within the hospital system itself, care homes, workplaces?

And we still don't comprehensively understand this virus. Italian science twats found genes related to the coronavirus in air pollution. If this disease is that airborne and can travel that far, we're into some weird territory.

[Andy]

The Guardian had a predictable piece saying how restaurants can't economically carry out social distancing and same will no doubt go for bars and clubs. These govts need to simply work on increasing hospital capacity and testing because this can't carry on. The rebellion will occur.

Lots of places were struggling before, if they have to operate at 50% occupancy for long they will die.

[Spikey M]

It's probably better for the economy to open the bars and restaurants and subsidise them at half capacity than to Furlough everyone.

[Smjffy]

It's probably better for the economy to open the bars and restaurants and subsidise them at half capacity than to Furlough everyone.

So many of those bars and restaurants need more support to even be open after this as many aren't eligible for the scheme. So many need the £25k grant threshold to be increased from £51k to £150k. Retail, leisure and hospitality accounts for north of £600BN to the economy.

If people are expecting to leg it to the pubs they are going to be disappointed.

https://raisethebarcampaign.com/

[phonics]

McDonalds and Hairdressers open up tomorrow. It's a big day :drool:

[Bam]

If people are expecting to leg it to the pubs they are going to be disappointed.

https://raisethebarcampaign.com/

I don’t think anybody expects to be going to the pub for along time tbh.

[phonics]

I'm going on June 8th. Suckers.

[Lewis]

There must be enough pent up demand to keep places going once they re-open at half capacity, because it will just spread out across the week rather than places doing most of their business over two nights.

[Waffdon]

McDonalds and Hairdressers open up tomorrow. It's a big day :drool:

Watch, John will get offended.

[phonics]

But that would be so out of character of him.

[Yevrah]

There must be enough pent up demand to keep places going once they re-open at half capacity, because it will just spread out across the week rather than places doing most of their business over two nights.

The demand isn't the issue, it's the drinking culture in this country being thoroughly unsuited to stopping this spreading like wildfire again.

[phonics]

Social distance punch ups outside Oceana:drool:

[Lewis]

The demand isn't the issue, it's the drinking culture in this country being thoroughly unsuited to stopping this spreading like wildfire again.

Yeah, so bars and nightclubs aren't opening any time soon. But restaurants and table pubs can crack on half-full.

[John Arne]

The demand isn't the issue, it's the drinking culture in this country being thoroughly unsuited to stopping this spreading like wildfire again.

I'm guessing the idea is that lockdown is dissipating and eventually removing the virus from everybody in the population. So, when you reopen, there is no virus left to spread. Obviously that relies heavily on the virus having totally gone.

[Giggles]

I'm guessing the idea is that lockdown is dissipating and eventually removing the virus from everybody in the population. So, when you reopen, there is no virus left to spread. Obviously that relies heavily on the virus having totally gone.

Once there’s an airport open you could only guarantee that for about an hour anyway.

[John Arne]

Once there’s an airport open you could only guarantee that for about an hour anyway.

Yup.

[Yevrah]

Beating it by locking down alone (particularly with our version of lockdown) would be impossible.

I can only assume they're waiting to get their shit together with the testing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I went for a walk along the Thames this afternoon, and the water was so clear.

[Giggles]

What does testing accomplish really though? Numbers for the news?

[Yevrah]

What does testing accomplish really though? Numbers for the news?

If you get it to a manageable level from the lockdown you could in theory eradicate it with testing and tracing afterwards. We're not very good with that at the moment though, and our airports are still open and we're not stopping anyone, so until Wallance make their next move I've no idea what our actual strategy is.

[7om]

What does testing accomplish really though? Numbers for the news?

This is where I’m at with it. We don’t know if antibodies confer protection against reinfection and we don’t know how long the antibody persists in the blood. These are two massive unknowns that really need answering before we start creaming ourselves over testing and ending a lockdown.

[-james-]

Prison Planet absolutely losing his shit at Piers Morgan is very lol

[Giggles]

Is Prison Planet a person? They should be in Johns names bracket.

[phonics]

One of my favourite tweets.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C5rmg9wXMAADmch.jpg

[Don]

This is where I’m at with it. We don’t know if antibodies confer protection against reinfection and we don’t know how long the antibody persists in the blood. These are two massive unknowns that really need answering before we start creaming ourselves over testing and ending a lockdown.

The antibody testing/immunity passport idea is separate to the antigen testing/contact-tracing idea, no? The former as you say is just theory atm but the latter is the South Korea model of beating the virus and what every country should be looking to pour its resources into.

[Smjffy]

One of my favourite tweets.

img

I don't even know who this flange is but he's cropped up a lot today. He's an idiot.

[Disco]

Surely you've seen phonics before.

[phonics]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EWjNCLDXgAUGzAh.jpg

[Giggles]

How has nobody put a bullet in that thing yet.

[John]

Looks like he's close to learning how to spell 'hamburger', so at least he's making progress.

[phonics]

Just remembered this moment again

https://media.newyorker.com/photos/5c3e10b2f92c694343cc71b9/master/pass/Rosner-Fast-Food-Trump.jpg

[Giggles]

Serious amount of hambergers.

[Lewis]

One of the all-time great photographs that.

[phonics]

One of the all-time great photographs that.

Kubrick came back from the dead to capture this exact moment.

[John]

Serious amount of hambergers.

It was still 'hamberders' at that point.

[Smjffy]

I really want to get off this planet. FML.

We need to figure out at what point in time it all went wrong.

[phonics]

I really want to get off this planet. FML.

We need to figure out at what point in time it all went wrong.

Our refusal to reckon with the financial crisis and the subsequent can-kicking from there on in.

[Magic]

I went up to Inverness to return my company stuff (inc car) today. I got a 1 way hire car back down the road. Some sort of Vauhall spastic mobile with sliding doors. Fucking cunts.

[Lee]

The Italians are planning to open bars, restaurants and hotels on 1st June.

Probably best wait and see how that goes before we fancy a crack at it.

[Smjffy]

Again, most of these bars, restaurants and hotels aren't eligible for the scheme and won't make it that far and even if some did, their suppliers might not etc. Thousands of them especially in my industry.

[Waffdon]

Back training in Italy from 18th May. Always fancied a holiday to Italy.

[Offshore Toon]

The government should subsidise takeaways to support the hospitality industry with 50% off and free delivery until further notice.

[Boydy]

1252021771919712256

[Spikey M]

https://media.giphy.com/media/C9iYu7faFZloyZtqgy/giphy.gif

[Giggles]

https://media.giphy.com/media/C9iYu7faFZloyZtqgy/giphy.gif

A live view inside Yev’s brain.

[Yevrah]

Why mine?

[Lewis]

Every twat in that room (and every similar scene) will have been nursing their drink so they could throw it in the air like a wanker. I would rather watch the match in a room full of vuvuzela users.

[Spikey M]

Why mine?

Because you're a filthy fucking deviant cunt.

Or

Because you seem to get a strange enjoyment (probably not the right word) out of how pervasive this thing is.

[Spikey M]

Every twat in that room (and every similar scene) will have been nursing their drink so they could throw it in the air like a wanker. I would rather watch the match in a room full of vuvuzela users.

That's basically American Waterboarding vs Chinese Water Torture

[Yevrah]

Because you're a filthy fucking deviant cunt.

Or

Because you seem to get a strange enjoyment (probably not the right word) out of how pervasive this thing is.

Fair point. The whole thing has been very interesting though. Are people who don't find it such just a bit brain dead?

[Lewis]

It's absolutely wild isn't it. I still say its long-term effects will amount to not a lot, but we'll always remember the thing/period itself. Remember when we couldn't do fuck all for three months [plus] because some Chinaman shoved a bat up his arse? Mental.

[Smjffy]

I'm not so optimistic. I reckon it will come back with vengeance and people will be assed going through all this shit again.

[Spikey M]

Fair point. The whole thing has been very interesting though. Are people who don't find it such just a bit brain dead?

I see both sides of it. It's interesting watching it, how different countries (and communities within) deal with it and we are living through history right now.

This is the next generations 9/11. We're keeping little trinkets at the moment, just drawings, hand prints, the letter from No. 10, etc for our son and daughter. One is 4, the other is 18 months. Our 4 year old will probably remember 'the bug' and not being allowed to go out, but beyond that, they'll have no idea about any of this in 10 years time. They'll have no idea how it changed the world (and it will) unless we tell them.

But...

I really do want that BigMac.

[Shindig]

The reports of it jumping to animals with relative ease has me worried. All it takes it for that to go avian and we're all fucked. EDIT: Also I'm keeping the No. 10 letter. I really wish I'd held on to the leaflet the Labour government gave out about terror attacks in the wake of 7/7.

[Spikey M]

The reports of it jumping to animals with relative ease has me worried. All it takes it for that to go avian and we're all fucked.

Why? It's already everywhere.

[Lewis]

The reports of it jumping to animals with relative ease has me worried. All it takes it for that to go avian and we're all fucked.

That dog you used to boot will be licking all your stuff.

[Shindig]

He won't. He's dead.

[Spikey M]

He won't. He's dead.

Covid Z.

[Giggles]

I’ve heard it knows how to hide in your shopping bags now, especially click & collect. Jumps out on your face in the drive home.

[Spikey M]

I’ve heard it knows how to hide in your shopping bags now, especially click & collect. Jumps out on your face in the drive home.

It only respects Online Deliveries and those that only go out for exercise in their local area.

[Don]

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/apr/26/virologist-christian-drosten-germany-coronavirus-expert-interview

Good clean scientific insights.

Also some 1 year old and 3 year old stabbed up and murdered by parents in Ilford. I wonder to what extent COVID-related.

[Giggles]

It only respects Online Deliveries and those that only go out for exercise in their local area.

I don’t go out and exercise at all :cool:

[Smjffy]

Fair point. The whole thing has been very interesting though. Are people who don't find it such just a bit brain dead?

One for you.



https://i.imgur.com/htShOIf.png

[Magic]

DM'd Jase to see what the underlying condish was.

[Queenslander]

Bledisloe is a draw this year though...


Coronavirus: New Zealand claims no community cases as lockdown eases
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-52436658?at_campaign=64&at_medium=custom7&at_custom1=%5Bpost+type%5D&at_custom3=BBC+News&at_custom4=FAB0F5D2-884E-11EA-B8A8-DDFB39982C1E&at_custom2=facebook_page&fbclid=IwAR3b0dfrDUcB9XDp1Ua_xOosT4woiaYOHQULOj-Rtsdg3j-HNS1Q1dNyaLU

New Zealand > England

[Smjffy]

Boris and his bluster is back but that was pretty pointless. Kay Burley needs to fuck off, mind. Repulsive woman.

[Spikey M]

There are other News Channels.

[Smjffy]

Meh. All equally as bullshit as the rest I'm sure. I just watched the live stream on Twitter. I don't have a preferred station.

I don't even have a preferred media outlet. Guardian mostly but fuck knows which outlets are left/right leaning, they all seem pretty bollocks.

[Queenslander]

BBC is the only channel for me.

[Yevrah]

If anyone is attempting to compare the problem we had with New Zealand then they need to give their head a wobble.

Not having a go at you Queens, more that I heard it in the news this morning. The population of London alone dwarfs their entire country and we have far more international travel. That isn't to say we've done well, but any comparison can be filed in the bin.

[Queenslander]

I am because this is a sport me... Queensland is bigger in every possible way compared to New Zealand.

I was having fun Yevrah

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've realised this morning that the foreseeable future for everyone, once the gradual lockdown begins to ease, will basically be what I happen to have been experiencing up until this point: a semi-permanent state of work all week, nothing to look forward to at the weekend.

It's fucking awful and will leave us with collective PTSD for years.

[Yevrah]

I've realised this morning that the foreseeable future for everyone, once the gradual lockdown begins to ease, will basically be what I happen to have been experiencing up until this point: a semi-permanent state of work all week, nothing to look forward to at the weekend.

It's fucking awful and will leave us with collective PTSD for years.

We'll be fine Jim. If we're allowed to go back to work it's likely we'll be allowed to have people round to our houses (at least those not in risk groups), which will be huge for keeping the PTSD at bay.

[Smjffy]

Will you enforcing social distancing at home in the house the same way you would be forced to implement it in your job? Unlikely.

[Giggles]

we'll be fine jim. If we're allowed to go back to work it's likely we'll be allowed to have people round to our houses (at least those not in risk groups), which will be huge for keeping the ptsd at bay.

YOU DON'T KNOW MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE.


small

[Jimmy Floyd]

We'll be fine Jim. If we're allowed to go back to work it's likely we'll be allowed to have people round to our houses (at least those not in risk groups), which will be huge for keeping the PTSD at bay.

I doubt we'll be 'allowed' to go back to work (I mean, I'm typing this from an office, but you know what I mean) for months. New Zealand PM explicitly said this morning as they declared victory over community spread of the virus: 'We're opening up the economy, but not people's social lives'.

It's fucking bleak. I don't know if this is just me thinking this as I enter the fifth week since I last saw anyone other than my MD and the shipping manager, and the seventh since I saw any friend or family member. But the whole thing to me has a distinct whiff of 'This will be over by Christmas' when of course it will not.

[Yevrah]

I doubt we'll be 'allowed' to go back to work (I mean, I'm typing this from an office, but you know what I mean) for months. New Zealand PM explicitly said this morning as they declared victory over community spread of the virus: 'We're opening up the economy, but not people's social lives'.

It's fucking bleak. I don't know if this is just me thinking this as I enter the fifth week since I last saw anyone other than my MD and the shipping manager, and the seventh since I saw any friend or family member. But the whole thing to me has a distinct whiff of 'This will be over by Christmas' when of course it will not.

Oh, I think it's going to take ages too. But that's the crumb of comfort for next steps, whenever it may be.

I haven't seen anyone I like in the flesh for 7 weeks either. It sucks, but I'm ok with it as for that period at least it was for the greater good.

[Ian]

I've realised this morning that the foreseeable future for everyone, once the gradual lockdown begins to ease, will basically be what I happen to have been experiencing up until this point: a semi-permanent state of work all week, nothing to look forward to at the weekend.

It's fucking awful and will leave us with collective PTSD for years.

At least WFH comes with the benefit of saving money and Sunday Night Blues no longer being a thing because every day is exactly the same so there's no use dreading one in particular.

Having to still go into work but also having the numbing boredom must be pretty dire.

[Smjffy]

The only person in flesh I have seen is whoever serves at the co-op otherwise I am 300 miles away from home, stuck in a tiny room in St Mawes wondering how on earth I am going to get past this week as my funds run out, going home costs £200 on train which obviously I can't afford, National Express no longer running otherwise I would have used that. If I knew now that I wasn't going to be able to be furloughed because of a RTI date then I would have went home once the lock down was announced so I could have at least helped my own family whereas now I'm pretty stranded.

I had four boiled eggs for tea yesterday. I am legit having to ration what little I have left in the hope I get a Universal Credit payment sometime in May.

It's so fucked up but hey ho. Life.

[Andy]

It must be really shit for you guys living alone. I think I'd be struggling if I didnt have my wife around, even our cats help a lot.

I've had a chat with my parents a couple of times from a distance when I've dropped things off to them, they live two minutes away from me.

Also just getting out for a walk is nice and feels like things are normal-ish.

It's the fear of the unknown that I'm trying to ignore - will we get to go on holiday this year? What will it it be like when I'm back at work and going in people houses? Will there still be a job for me to go back to after this?

[Jimmy Floyd]

At least WFH comes with the benefit of saving money and Sunday Night Blues no longer being a thing because every day is exactly the same so there's no use dreading one in particular.

Having to still go into work but also having the numbing boredom must be pretty dire.

I think that might be what it is. For me the routine is still the same and yet the good things - company of colleagues during the day, things to go out and do on evenings and the weekend, seeing family, following sport, etc - are all gone.

The three days I did working from home were OK as I was kind of in control of what I did, the environment was relaxed and I didn't have to drive to it at a certain time.