Coronavirus Death Thread

[Yevrah]

Italy rolling in with another 349 dead.

For the last two days it's killed someone in Italy every 4 minutes.

[Yevrah]

That retired nurse on youtube speculates that the Italian doctors tend to prescribe painkillers to reduce fever. I forget which ones are a no-no but there's non-steroid ones and steroid ones. One of which aggravates the infection. Might explain why younger patients are finding themselves in trouble.

My Mum was telling me go with paracetamol and avoid Ibuprofen. She has rabid OCD, so her whole life has been built in preparation for this.

[Lewis]

Let's say it kills a million people in Britain alone. Then what? Do we self-isolate forever after that? Do we all keep a cupboard full of emergency pasta and bog roll? How does it alter our way of life on an existential level in the long-term? It doesn't. The Cold War did. The War on Terror has. It's a temporary pain in the arse, not an existential crisis.

[Giggles]

I'm jumping out here. Too many people going full nutter it's just stressing me out.

Need to be definitely only done in dribs and drabs. Balls deep in this would make you find the nearest bridge.

[Yevrah]

I would say the impact, as far as I can see, to us in the West from the War on Terror has been minimal. Cold War is a fair shout though, but again and as Jim said, people still got on with their daily routine.

[phonics]

Let's say it kills a million people in Britain alone. Then what? Do we self-isolate forever after that? Do we all keep a cupboard full of emergency pasta and bog roll? How does it alter our way of life on an existential level in the long-term? It doesn't. The Cold War did. The War on Terror has. It's a temporary pain in the arse, not an existential crisis.

Did you see they've lifted the ban on having certain amounts of liquid when going through the airport? Almost like it was complete bollocks in the first place.

[Yevrah]

Did you see they've lifted the ban on having certain amounts of liquid when going through the airport? Almost like it was complete bollocks in the first place.

Have they really? Fuck me. What chumps. Either because it wasn't needed, or if it was, why lift it?

[phonics]

Have they really? Fuck me. What chumps. Either because it wasn't needed, or if it was, why lift it?

They don't make sanitizers at that ml amount or something. So as long as it's in a Purrell bottle, carry on as much explosive material as you'd like I guess?

[Kikó]

How does losing a million people change the way we live? Really? I mean that's fucking huge. That's 3x more than we lost in ww2 (soldiers).


By the way, watching this through the markets, like CNBC, is fascinating. Really incredible scenes every minute.

[Yevrah]

The FTSE did indeed bomb today and it's going to again tomorrow.

[Giggles]

There’s not one thing any of us can do about the markets so we may just deal with whatever is left when the dust settles.

[Giggles]

Then again we all watch sport and you could say the exact same about that.

[Lee]

https://twitter.com/alexwickham/status/1239627406215872522?s=21

Jesus fucking christ.

At least they’ve changed their minds, I suppose.

[Kikó]

So when is the UK government going to announce emergency measures for business like suspended business rates, tax breaks and other support measures? And also self employed/zero hours getting welfare payments to avoid going in? Not forcing pubs/clubs/theatres/etc to close is cowardly as well.

[Smjffy]

I wouldn't be surprised if the restaurant I work at isn't closed in the next week anyway based purely on the drop in numbers, Kiko.

[Lewis]

I would say the impact, as far as I can see, to us in the West from the War on Terror has been minimal. Cold War is a fair shout though, but again and as Jim said, people still got on with their daily routine.

Do you think people stockpiling hand sanitiser will outlast the lingering suspicion of Muslims harboured by a decent amount of the population? Will all of the concrete blocks littering city centres be removed before people stop washing their hands for twenty seconds? Will the ridiculous layers of security around government buildings be loosened before the old people are allowed clubbing again? All these minor pains in the arse (and societal shifts) are permanent, so much so that we've got used to them. Staying indoors won't be.


How does losing a million people change the way we live? Really? I mean that's fucking huge. That's 3x more than we lost in ww2 (soldiers).

It would be 1.5% of the population, which would put it roughly half-way between Second and First World War deaths. The English Civil War was more than double that. And we're a peaceful country. That sort of death and misery is routine in the shitter parts of the world.

[phonics]

The Spanish Flu infected 25% of the entire world population and killed 20 to 50 million people. Life moves on.

[mugbull]

The Spanish Flu infected 25% of the entire world population and killed 20 to 50 million people. Life moves on.

Modern society is way less accustomed to mass death and because of that the shock to the system would be enormous

[Giggles]

We’ve just been told that half of us will get it anyway. There’s no hope our medical system can treat 2.5m people so maybe it’s time to start licking door handles.

[Lewis]

It's not about death totals. I'm not playing that down (as such). My point is that for it to be an existential crisis our lives will have to be fundamentally altered in its wake, and I don't see how they could be.

[Yevrah]

https://twitter.com/alexwickham/status/1239627406215872522?s=21

Jesus fucking christ.

At least they’ve changed their minds, I suppose.

And if that's true, there it is.

Groupthink statistical modelling wank has cost us days/weeks.

[Shindig]

https://twitter.com/alexwickham/status/1239627406215872522?s=21

Jesus fucking christ.

At least they’ve changed their minds, I suppose.

And quickly. I'd imagine if I'm back at work in two weeks, it'll be part of a rotating skeleton crew.

[Lee]

And if that's true, there it is.

Groupthink statistical modelling wank has cost us days/weeks.

The same briefing is telling whoever is assembled that the only way out is a vaccine.

“To avoid a rebound in transmission these policies will need to be maintained until large stocks of vaccine are available to immunise the population - which could be 18 months or more.”

[Kikó]

It would be 1.5% of the population, which would put it roughly half-way between Second and First World War deaths. The English Civil War was more than double that. And we're a peaceful country. That sort of death and misery is routine in the shitter parts of the world.

But not this part of the world. It's going to impact the western world massively to collectively lose their parents and grand parents.

[mugbull]

Regardless, it's not going to happen. Every country will find a China-like equilibrium sooner or later

[mugbull]

Also wonder how much of a PR coup it's going to be for Xi knowing his country has donned the Europeans and Americans senseless

[Kikó]

Regardless, it's not going to happen. Every country will find a China-like equilibrium sooner or later

This doesn't exist.

[mugbull]

This doesn't exist.

Of course it does. Measures will get more stringent until deaths start dropping. Then the measures will be loosened bit by bit and re-tightened if necessary until the vaccine comes

[Shindig]

Also wonder how much of a PR coup it's going to be for Xi knowing his country has donned the Europeans and Americans senseless

It's their fault we're in this mess.

[Kikó]

https://news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-nhs-doctor-warns-we-are-already-at-breaking-point-11958542

This is great.

[Lewis]

But not this part of the world. It's going to impact the western world massively to collectively lose their parents and grand parents.

Not existentially. If your grandparents cark it are you going to work from home forever?

[phonics]

Guys, I've just gone all in on the panic being good. My dealer gave me 2 for 1 on the weed and a free gram of the white stuff 'in case they do a proper lockdown and I can't get over here for a bit'.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Not existentially. If your grandparents cark it are you going to work from home forever?

You're thinking far too much tides of history and not people's lived experiences. Collective Memory, I believe they call it at some institutions.

[Spikey M]

It's their fault we're in this mess.

That'll probably be the title of the manifesto.

[Magic]

Only my Gran is still alive, she'd be fucked if she got the common cold never mind anything else. Other than that, fuck the whole lot of them.

[Magic]

Actually fuck my Gran as well, she'd be far better off in the ground.

[Lewis]

You're thinking far too much tides of history and not people's lived experiences. Collective Memory, I believe they call it at some institutions.

And the practical results of everyone moping around, in terms of what we actually do day-to-day, are what?

[Jimmy Floyd]

And the practical results of everyone moping around, in terms of what we actually do day-to-day, are what?

Not results. What they go through while it happens. People literally aren't allowed to see each other.

[Lewis]

Which is an inconvenience.

[randomlegend]

A doctor friend has been put on indefinite paid leave because she's on immunosuppressants.

Not soon enough by the sounds of things. She's unwell, been swabbed and awaiting results. Really hope she's ok :(

[Magic]

I forgot my big step-sister is on immuno-suppressants.

:uhoh:

[Kikó]

Which is an inconvenience.

Super autistic again. This is a shared moment of public separation and grief.

[Kikó]

Similar to Diana dying.

:baz:

[Lewis]

Super autistic again. This is a shared moment of public separation and grief.

Until it stops being, and we all go back to our current (rather than new) normal.

[Offshore Toon]

We desperately need some new threads.

[Luca]

I don't have the answer(s), but curious to know if there were major societal shifts after the Spanish Flu - different context, to be sure, but could be a lens of analysis.

I think we will see a glut of funding into networking and conferencing technologies (AR/VR, 5G), and probably a large downsizing in office space as we realize that the massive fixed infrastructure investment is...not that necessary.

[Jimmy Floyd]

In this country at least, we'll end up with a universal basic income, and Labour will win the next four elections.

[Shindig]

Some kind of global pandemic response charter. Office space is a weird one because the open plan offices I have seem to give you the space between workers. Aviation's going to go through some changes. The use it or lose it EU slot rules will probably stay gone to allow flexibility. I've heard some chatter about them changing routines around how they clean planes but, to be honest, disease spread on planes is about proximity as much as it is about surfaces.

[The Merse]

In this country at least, we'll end up with a universal basic income, and Labour will win the next four elections.

The first part of that is my genuine hope as the longest lasting outcome.

[phonics]

I don't have the answer(s), but curious to know if there were major societal shifts after the Spanish Flu - different context, to be sure, but could be a lens of analysis.

Think that would be impossible with it occurring between the two wars.

[Spikey M]

1239622850505510913?s=19

[niko_cee]

That had better be a real name.

[Giggles]

Half an hour? Shit must be going down.

[Spikey M]

Half an hour? Shit must be going down.

What?

[Lewis]

Yevrah's buried under all his provisions like when Principal Skinner went missing.

[Spikey M]

What?

[Boydy]

1239669605586604032

Fucking hell

[Magic]

I'm on an hourly swing of fuck it I get sick I get sick and oh my god I am not leaving the house.

[Giggles]

I'm on an hourly swing of fuck it I get sick I get sick and oh my god I am not leaving the house.

You seem to bottom and peak ten times a day.

[Lewis]

That sounds like they have updated their models with the actual information gathered, having initially had to base them on certain assumptions (such as increased awareness, which would negate just chucking Chinese data into them) into account.

It has been pretty lol watching the professional know-it-all wanker class suddenly finding themselves as ignorant about something as the rest of us. They could just think about these things logically like some of us are attempting to, and admit where they lack understanding; but then they would just be another chump, so they're having to 1) blag fuck out of it; and/or 2) steer it round to their usual NARRATIVE frameworks and bullshit specialities ('specialities'), i.e. lolthegovernment. It's not unlike how Vote Leave gamed them to pieces feeding the Boris vs Dave angle when they would otherwise have ignored half of their stuff.

[Boydy]

Hope he sees this king

[Bernanke]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfkbv_WQtn0&feature=emb_title

Fucking hell this is grim.

[Giggles]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfkbv_WQtn0&feature=emb_title

Fucking hell this is grim.

It’s Channel 4. They make grim.

[Magic]

Looool Suppression being heavily advised to Govt. Looks like they've killed potentially hundreds of thousands with that initial approach.

[Giggles]

Is she living in the shed now and if not, why can she not broadcast from a room in the house?


1239685503227695104

[Pepe]

Preparing online courses sucks arse. Bring all the cunts back, rather get sick.

[Pepe]

Everything closing over here tomorrow too. Cunt garage cancelled my appointment to get my inspection. I better not get any tickets in the next couple of weeks or I will go on a rampage that will make the virus look like nothing.

[Luca]

PA State Police are twats of the highest order, so good luck with that.

[Pepe]

I have been driving with an expired MO registration for over a year without issues, so I am hoping for the best.

[Luca]

Preparing online courses sucks arse. Bring all the cunts back, rather get sick.

Does your uni have facilities to record lectures, or do you have to build and post slides?

[Pepe]

Does your uni have facilities to record lectures, or do you have to build and post slides?

I'll be working from home. Planning to record some videos and stuff.

[Queenslander]

Tom Hanks is out of hospital but still in isolation.

[phonics]

I'll be working from home. Planning to record some videos and stuff.

I could teach you how to livestream your class so you could just do your traditional version.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tormund has it :(

Good thing is that he'll lol it off pronto though.

[Yevrah]

I genuinely cannot believe what's transpired today. Attitudes of blindly following the experts should never EVER prevail again.

[Queenslander]

Boris is off his head.

[Yevrah]

Watching Newsnight now and from this point onward there should be no two bit politicians invited to gob off on these programmes. They can't answer a question directly as they've been trained not to for their entire careers - this health minister woman can't even answer the question directly of whether a wedding should be held under the new guidelines.

People need clear and concise direction in these times, not wank. The two scientists, Boris and Hancock (we're stuck with them due to their position for the foreseeable whatever you think of them) + maybe a couple of others should be it. No one else says anything. It's simply not needed.

[Queenslander]

Facebook needs to be blocked down here for a month.

Qantas and Virgin reckon they will offer travel credits in return for cancelled flights.

[Baz]

I could teach you how to livestream your class so you could just do your traditional version.

Zoom?

[Jimmy Floyd]

My intial survey of Chertsey at 7.30 in the morning tells me that no one gives a fuck about 'avoiding unnecessary social contact' or going into confined spaces. Costa Coffee looked to be buzzing.

Boris and co have simply got to realise that white van man doesn't read the news and if he does, doesn't give a shit about it.

[Andy]

Boris and co have simply got to realise that white van man doesn't read the news and if he does, doesn't give a shit about it.

Maybe think about what you're saying. Most of the "white van" men youre on about are going to be self employed people who work really hard to provide for their families now stuck in incredibly uncertain times with jobs getting cancelled left, right and centre with no help from the government.

But yeah White van builder idiots dont give a fuck about the news.

[Giggles]

Maybe think about what you're saying. Most of the "white van" men youre on about are going to be self employed people who work really hard to provide for their families now stuck in incredibly uncertain times with jobs getting cancelled left, right and centre with no help from the government.

But yeah White van builder idiots dont give a fuck about the news.

I’m surprised that attitude even surprised you.

[mugbull]

What is a “white van man” in British parlance?

[Magic]

What is a “white van man” in British parlance?

AR15 wielding BBQer?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Maybe think about what you're saying. Most of the "white van" men youre on about are going to be self employed people who work really hard to provide for their families now stuck in incredibly uncertain times with jobs getting cancelled left, right and centre with no help from the government.

But yeah White van builder idiots dont give a fuck about the news.

It's just a convenient catch all phrase. And yes of course they have to carry on working. But what the fuck are they doing piled up in coffee shops and cafs like normal.

These people are my customers so it's not like I'm some ivory tower cunt with no stake in it.

[Mellberg]

What is a “white van man” in British parlance?

Working class male. Plumbers/electricians etc.

Basically, Jim has his head up his arse.

[Giggles]

AR15 wielding BBQer?

Jimmy sees all white van men as the way I see all English men. Neither of us is right.

[Magic]

Anyone else taking their kids to school? It feels like sending them to a death camp, where they aren't going to be victims but train to become murderers.

Literally every single kid was talking about death. Who's going to die, who has it, who's relatives are going to die, who should they shun, discussing if coughing at teachers they don't like will float.

Absolutely mental. And they were all coughing and sneezing and sniffling. Fucking nightmarish.

[Giggles]

I wouldn't have them anywhere near school.

[niko_cee]

That sentence is three words longer than it needs to be.

[Giggles]

Also true.

[Magic]

We've both got the cold (NOT Corona).

I think I might keep her off tomorrow.

[Giggles]

We've both got the cold (NOT Corona).

I think I might keep her off tomorrow.

Act like you both have it.

[Lee]

My intial survey of Chertsey at 7.30 in the morning tells me that no one gives a fuck about 'avoiding unnecessary social contact' or going into confined spaces. Costa Coffee looked to be buzzing.

Boris and co have simply got to realise that white van man doesn't read the news and if he does, doesn't give a shit about it.

It's not 'white van man'. Or at least not only. Suited public sector director prick also fits the criteria. I just sat in a meeting for an update on the virus which instead became a room full of people performing mental gymnastics around how we might interpret the latest government advice. We are a corporate department, lads. We basically don't exist any longer. Get the fuck home.

I can see four elderly people in a ward from where I'm typing this. They are the people who will die if we carry on fucking about. As for me, I'm off. I've got plenty to get on with that doesn't need to be done in this building.

[Shindig]

Civil service plugs away which, given how many claimants we have claims about to run out, is a necessary action.

[Mellberg]

This is the problem:

Some LAD on Facebook has just posted that he has some symptoms, so doesn't want to stay at home at risk of infecting his elderly mother (he's at least 35, lol). He's asking if anyone has a room for a couple of weeks. Then some daft bint replies with this:

"Pointless moving out this is not just gonna go away in a few weeks so long as you all maintain good hygiene keep areas clean she should be ok x"

Sound. You might be about to inadvertently kill your mom, but just crack on kid. The fucking ignorance and stupidity...and to share that in the form of advice :lol:

I'd be in a hotel tonight.

[Ian]

On the plus side she'll probably be offered a government job based on that advice.

[Lewis]

There ought to be some sort of escalating response to drip-feed the seriousness of it to these sort of people on a longer-term basis.

[Shindig]

Well, with the travel ban all valid ESTA's for EU, Irish and UK citizens have now been voided by the US government.

[Mellberg]

I've had to wade in. Silly cunt.

[Lewis]

Not sure that shouting out the back of your Rolls-Royce helps.

[Disco]

Two gone from our place this morning, the only response so far is a flippant remark from our MD. You have to wonder what needs to happen for them to take it seriously.

[Giggles]

Worst Paddys Day ever. I'd have worked if I could.

[Mellberg]

Not sure that shouting out the back of your Rolls-Royce helps.

:D

I'll give you a lift round to Sean's gaff some time.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Two gone from our place this morning, the only response so far is a flippant remark from our MD. You have to wonder what needs to happen for them to take it seriously.

Our MD is now considering a rotational system so you could be last man standing.

Meanwhile my golf group is now discussing which courses we should play next week to replace the Portugal trip, I don't know which part of 'unnecessary social contact' they are struggling with.

[Lewis]

:D

I'll give you a lift round to Sean's gaff some time.

It's the boomin' little one.

[Lewis]

Meanwhile my golf group is now discussing which courses we should play next week to replace the Portugal trip, I don't know which part of 'unnecessary social contact' they are struggling with.

The bit where they normally book holidays around it.

[Boydy]

I knocked on my elderly neighbours door yesterday (he and his wife must be in their 80s) to see if they have anyone to go to the shops for them or if they needed anything. He said they were okay for now and I told him to just knock on my door if they do need anything. Just watched them head out somewhere in the car.

[Giggles]

I knocked on my elderly neighbours door yesterday (he and his wife must be in their 80s) to see if they have anyone to go to the shops for them or if they needed anything. He said they were okay for now and I told him to just knock on my door if they do need anything. Just watched them head out somewhere in the car.

You probably messed up their isolation and infected them so they're away to get tested.

[Boydy]

You probably messed up their isolation and infected them so they're away to get tested.
:D

I stood quite far back.

[John Arne]

https://gyazo.com/2c385327653ceb6824810196e9f2b835.jpeg

[Magic]

You can't make everyone walk about in masks forever. This really will be survival of the fittest.

[Giggles]

You can't make everyone walk about in masks forever. This really will be survival of the fittest.

Says yer man who was bawling into his keyboard this time yesterday.

[Magic]

Says yer man who was bawling into his keyboard this time yesterday.

Just an observation. I don't think I'll be putting the wean to school tomorrow though.

[Ian]

Seemingly Johnson's dad has just been on TV saying if he HAS to go to the pub then he jolly well will.

People can definitely be trusted to decide what they think is necessary.

[Magic]

Moronavirus.

[Magic]

Although I did find 'Operation Last Gasp' an absolutely amazing quip. :D

[Yevrah]

Have any countries stopped people going to work full stop?

[mugbull]

Have any countries stopped people going to work full stop?

That would result in the complete breakdown of society, so I’d say no

[Lewis]

I'm in a relatively busy Irish bar eating a breakfast. There is literally a bloke with a fiddle. All together now.

'Sure it's a cold and it is infectful...'

[Shindig]

Seemingly Johnson's dad has just been on TV saying if he HAS to go to the pub then he jolly well will.

People can definitely be trusted to decide what they think is necessary.

It's the elderly that's the most stubborn as well. Just got some more shopping in as I was out of chips, butter and veg. I got all of these and a few more ready meals. Meat is all cleared out and the cheaper options for the three things I were after are gone. Not quite chaos.

[Giggles]

I'm in a relatively busy Irish bar eating a breakfast. There is literally a bloke with a fiddle. All together now.

'Sure it's a cold and it is infectful...'

I would have thought you’d have needed disinfected after going into an Irish bar, let alone eat in one.

[Lewis]

Well exactly. In for a penny...

[Giggles]

That said, I can only imagine what it’s like. I’d probably need hosed down myself.

[Waffdon]

Horse racing suspended altogether from tomorrow until at least end of April. Fuck sake

[Jimmy Floyd]

The biggest challenge around all this is that all significant fun is basically banned until further notice. Within a few weeks people will be up the fucking wall, even if they aren't ill.

[Giggles]

Horse racing suspended altogether from tomorrow until at least end of April. Fuck sake

Hopefully one thing that never returns.

[Waffdon]

What’s wrong with it?

[Giggles]

There’s Euro 2020 gone.

[Giggles]

What’s wrong with it?

It exists purely for gambling.

[Waffdon]

Again: what’s wrong with it?

[Offshore Toon]

If Michael Owen loves it, it's probably crap.

[niko_cee]

The biggest challenge around all this is that all significant fun is basically banned until further notice. Within a few weeks people will be up the fucking wall, even if they aren't ill.

There's definitely something dystopian about the society we are seemingly lurching towards.

The cull might be preferable.

[Smjffy]

Problem gambling might at least reduce by time it's all over when people realise they've got more money than they had when they were betting.

[Pepe]

I could teach you how to livestream your class so you could just do your traditional version.

I know how to do it, but having to watch an hour long online lecture sounds awful. I will just do short, bantastic videos instead.

[Waffdon]

Problem gambling might at least reduce by time it's all over when people realise they've got more money than they had when they were betting.

Dogs still on the go hopefully. Virtual betting too!

[Yevrah]

The biggest challenge around all this is that all significant fun is basically banned until further notice. Within a few weeks people will be up the fucking wall, even if they aren't ill.

Which let's be fair, we're probably all quite good at. We will rise up from the flames when everyone is a vegetable from lack of stimulating their brains.

[Shindig]

If you're a problem gambler, you'll just bet on current events.

[Yevrah]

Boris Johnson yesterday urged everyone to "avoid pubs, clubs, theatres and other such social venues", saying it was particularly important for people over 70.

But Stanley Johnson, 79, said: "Of course I'll go to a pub if I need to go to a pub." Speaking on ITV's This Morning, he said landlords "don't want people to be not in the pub at all".

:facepalm: We ultimately might have to let them all die.

[Ian]

Stanley Johnson in Turkeys Don't Vote For Christmas bombshell.

[Disco]

Have any countries stopped people going to work full stop?

Not sure about full stop but Holland, Germany, Poland have been told to use 50% of their workforce and their manufacturing sector is about to be closed for two weeks.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Poland was buzzing this morning. Spain and France a little more subdued, but business still exists. Northern Ireland positively hopping.

[niko_cee]

I don't know how many of you really remember the 2008 financial crisis, but I recall at the time how there felt like a massive groundswell of opinion in favour of the business of stuff, I'll call it. Digging stuff out of the ground, making stuff, tangible things were good, and high finance and services were bad. I wonder if that will reverse in this crisis, where the business of stuff is massively impacted whilst the business of services and the like can carry on much less hindered by working remotely etc?

I still reckon, when you look at what has happened to the prices for the big US tech companies, there has to be a point when buying them becomes a no-brainer. They can weather any storm and if google run out of cash, well, then society will have collapsed and money probably lost all meaning by that point.

[bruhnaldo]

Just got a work from home survey oh boy

[Magic]

Loads of pointless, ego-massaging events have been cancelled. And all those mongos that float around 'having coffees', now people will really start to question the point of them. And the life coaches. Corona. :drool:

[bruhnaldo]

All the death and depression is gonna suck BUT I tell ya if it does radically change the world in the sense people stop "going through the motions" with so many of the bullshit, mundane social cues we do from time to time that would be nice.

Like fuck off gender reveal parties for example. Fuck are you idiots talking about?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't know how many of you really remember the 2008 financial crisis, but I recall at the time how there felt like a massive groundswell of opinion in favour of the business of stuff, I'll call it. Digging stuff out of the ground, making stuff, tangible things were good, and high finance and services were bad. I wonder if that will reverse in this crisis, where the business of stuff is massively impacted whilst the business of services and the like can carry on much less hindered by working remotely etc?

I still reckon, when you look at what has happened to the prices for the big US tech companies, there has to be a point when buying them becomes a no-brainer. They can weather any storm and if google run out of cash, well, then society will have collapsed and money probably lost all meaning by that point.

Speaking from the business of stuff, whilst what you say is true operationally, people will continue to need stuff, so that offsets it a bit. Will they continue to need consultants?

[niko_cee]

No one needs consultatnts, but OUR NHS needs the service sector to fund it.

[Lewis]

Magic, sitting in his car outside his wife's house, arguing with two hazmat suited soldiers that actually this is self-isolating and anyway we're still paying road tax aren't we?

[Magic]

Things Corona has delayed/ruined:

My divorce
My career
My holidays
My life

xxx

[niko_cee]

We're going full Madagascar, no one's coming in without 14 day isolation.

No active cases, no evidence of community transmission.

[Magic]

2nd death confirmed in Scotland.

[niko_cee]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-51923334


It's been more than a month since the majority of Germany's Big Brother contestants entered the house.

In early February the first cases of coronavirus outside of Wuhan were just being reported.

Now Germany has close to 7,000 confirmed infections, with 14 deaths - but the housemates have no idea a global pandemic has been declared.

They'll finally be informed on Tuesday night in a live TV special, after "consultation with relatives".

Should be interesting.

[Ian]

Sounds like it's time for a rewatch of Dead Set.

[Yevrah]

I'd probably stay there...

[Magic]

Another 14 today.

[randomlegend]

So glad I'm having to stay on paeds for my next rotation. If I'd gone to urology I'd be one of the first in line to get drafted into front line adult medicine which is going to be fucking grim.

[Manc]

Second day of the job and after 40% of my team were sent home with symptoms the office has closed for the foreseeable. My chest is tightening and my throat has gone gippy. :drool:

[Disco]

I only caught the beginning but this would seem a fairly substantial package for businesses, hopefully that is going to include the self employed and more temporary workers in some way.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Given the shelves of local supermarkets now seem to be empty of soap, toilet roll and paracetemol by the time I swing by them after work, I feel it will only be a matter of time before I have to go at some ridiculous hour just to get essentials, appearing like a mentalist in the process.

[Boydy]

I picked up a click and collect order from Tesco this morning and even though I fixed anything that was unavailable at like 10pm last night there was still some stuff that wasn't fulfilled and other stuff that was substituted.

The guy giving me my stuff also said they'll probably be stopping click and collect soon.

Probably gonna have to do my next shop at like 3am on a Tuesday.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sunak absolutely donned that, and Lewis will be seething. Made Boris look like a floundering turnip as well.

They need to somehow work out help for renters and a few other groups (homeless?) but it's a great start.

[Andy]

From my experience the small shops still have everything.

I've been buying little and often over the last week since things started to ramp up a bit and I've not really struggled with much.

I've got more than enough to last the two of us for a month at least now. I am going to stop shopping now unless it's an essential to prevent contact outside of work.

[Shindig]

Yeah, beggars can't be choosers so If Tesco runs out, I've got a corner shop or two and a Lidl. Anything to avoid going into Durham which the students will have knackered. And then there's the takeaway places.

[Boydy]

Sunak absolutely donned that, and Lewis will be seething. Made Boris look like a floundering turnip as well.

They need to somehow work out help for renters and a few other groups (homeless?) but it's a great start.

I'm not entirely convinced by this so far but it sounds like he'll go a fair bit further. Not sure how keen businesses will be to take out loans, also worrying that there doesn't seem to be anything about wnsuring they pay their workers also what about people on zero hours or low minimum hours contracts who actually work a lot more hours?

Agree something needs to be done for renters.

But overall, yeah, felt much more reassured listening to Sunak than Johnson.

Also though Boris looked like he was just bored with it all and sure enough a minute later he was saying 'wrap it up'.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Early Mayor Boris would be donning this. Today's Boris looks tired, distracted and shit.

You have to think he'll get onto the other stuff soon. You probably can't work out how to help renters, self employed etc in 1-2 days.

Zero hour contracts as a thing will not survive this pandemic.

[Shindig]

Of course he does. No politician these days is ready for this.

[Lewis]

Good job we cut spending a bit when we did.

[phonics]

You can pause your Sky Sports subscription now.

https://www.sky.com/shop/covid19-customer-update?irct=CHP-tile#section-12

[Giggles]

Hopefully we’ll start to ramp up from tomorrow.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://twitter.com/matt_dathan/status/1239976875423924226

Love this sort of thing as well. Takes a crisis sometimes.

[Magic]

From my experience the small shops still have everything.

I've been buying little and often over the last week since things started to ramp up a bit and I've not really struggled with much.

I've got more than enough to last the two of us for a month at least now. I am going to stop shopping now unless it's an essential to prevent contact outside of work.

Not the case now.

[bruhnaldo]

1239976875423924226

[Andy]

But overall, yeah, felt much more reassured listening to Sunak than Johnson.

Also though Boris looked like he was just bored with it all and sure enough a minute later he was saying 'wrap it up'.

Mad seeing Rishi donning things on TV. He grew up two minutes away from my house, seems a bit surreal.

[Kikó]

One of the fun things (maybe this should be the work thread) is realising how the office infrastructure is really not set up for multiple work from home workers. Our ability to video call each other for example is shambolic. I've had to invent ways for us to be able to do face to face meetings because the approved method is just not fit for purpose.

[Raoul Duke]

One of the fun things (maybe this should be the work thread) is realising how the office infrastructure is really not set up for multiple work from home workers. Our ability to video call each other for example is shambolic. I've had to invent ways for us to be able to do face to face meetings because the approved method is just not fit for purpose.

Mine has been setup really well - Slack + Zoom is a winning combo

[Jimmy Floyd]

Our situation is a disgrace. The MD came in at 9am today and was talking about drafting up a plan for rotational wfh (this would be a good start) and he'd send an email round. He was then nowhere to be seen for the rest of the day and we still haven't heard anything, at a time when government advice is all possible should wfh.

We have all sorts of delivery men coming in and to make matters worse, someone's retirement card passed around the whole building, you couldn't make it up.

My guess is that El Presidente is crying his octogenarian ducts out in frustration because it wasn't like this in his day, he doesn't like being outranked by the PM, and you can't have business without everyone at the office.

[Disco]

My boss was still making plans today for a job to do with the Chelsea Flower Show, I was lolled at when I said it almost certainly wouldn't be happening.

https://www.itv.com/news/london/2020-03-17/chelsea-flower-show-cancelled-for-the-first-time-since-the-second-world-war/

:harold:

[mo]

The two big secondaries in my town are closed now due to staff shortages. We’re partially closed, years 10 and 12 have been asked to stay home. Which initially freed up two of my teaching periods tomorrow, but you know anyone freed up will get taken for cover.

[Kikó]

Mine has been setup really well - Slack + Zoom is a winning combo

Lol at your futuristic toolset. We've got Skype which sounds like people are drowning if you call through network and nothing really works video enabled. Had to just use Zoom and Whatsapp to make it possible.

[Boydy]

We're using Microsoft Teams which seems to be holding up pretty well.

Do you really need video calls?

[phonics]

We've got Teams (Microsoft Slack) + Zoom and I set-up a Discord for when Teams is crashing from too many people using it.

[Kikó]

We're using Microsoft Teams which seems to be holding up pretty well.

Do you really need video calls?

We're doing a few interviews so it's more human. And if we're all not seeing each other for ages, it's probably best to check in now and again.

[Giggles]

One of the fun things (maybe this should be the work thread) is realising how the office infrastructure is really not set up for multiple work from home workers. Our ability to video call each other for example is shambolic. I've had to invent ways for us to be able to do face to face meetings because the approved method is just not fit for purpose.

I’d say what it’ll end up showing a lot of companies is that 5 people will do where they had 20 before.

[Lewis]

I am in Brighton and places look only marginally less busy than they usually would. There is probably a case for locking anyone currently celebrating St. Patrick's Day in the pubs to starve to death.

[Kikó]

Depends how deadly this virus is....

[Shindig]

They deliver food now. They'll live.

[Lewis]

What virus?

[Giggles]

Lord Castleknock will address at 9pm. Either he’s trying to jump on the presidents usual Paddy’s Day speech or I’m not going in to work, or anywhere, for the foreseeable.

1240003872657231874

[Magic]

Teams here too, plus our cloud VoIP.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Some of the Churchill impressions are pretty crap. Boris's earlier was terrible.

[Foe]

Anything but Microsoft teams.

Good thing they turned off Skype. :moop:

[Giggles]

We do most remote stuff via Duo and Drive. Not big enough to need more and Duo is the only video service that isn’t complete dirt.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

I'm in the planning (office) side of a repair workshop for oil rig equipment. We'll be pretty limited in what we can do if we have to work from home given we usually need to be in the workshop a lot of the time.

There's still only the 2 off with symptoms (out of 8 of us) but their roles are more indirect. If a couple of the remaining 6 were to go for 2 weeks it wouldn't take long to turn into a clusterfuck.

[SvN]

We're working from home from tomorrow onwards. If this lasts 3-4 months, the lack of new business is going to end up in redundancies, and based on how happy people seemed to be told they're working from home, I don't think they realise that.

[Lewis]

I can't work from home so I'll just get to doss about on full pay. :humb:

[Mike]

I can't work from home so I'll just get to doss about on full pay. :humb:

That’s the dream.

Was a lot of getting work and stuff ready to send home should we need to today, I made up a few weeks of stuff for the two SEN children I work with, but it’s all hush hush and officially we aren’t doing it.
Can’t see us lasting to the end of next week, if only cos staff are dropping like flies, three more off today.

[Giggles]

Nothing new in that. More of a national address for the day that was in it.

[bruhnaldo]

We're working from home from tomorrow onwards. If this lasts 3-4 months, the lack of new business is going to end up in redundancies, and based on how happy people seemed to be told they're working from home, I don't think they realise that.

Told a girl i work with who works in a similar but diff dept about my WFH survey I received and she was so confused by my lack of enthusiasm.

I said honey there's literally already a call center that does what my job would entail if I went to WFH and then she realized there was one for her too lol

[Lewis]

I'm watching The 6th Day on something called 'Sony Movies Action'. If the Johnson regime want everyone inside then they want to be leaning on terrestrial channels to stick a decent film on every night.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I started off worried about redundancy, but on reflection there are two useless corpses beside me who could go first, and I churn through work and speak languages.

Not going to make any progress against the mortgage for a long time now, though.

[Luke Emia]

I’m working from home from tomorrow, missus is from Thursday.

The biggest annoyance for me is her brother. Her parents are 67 and look after the kids two days a week and also do the school run on those days. Her brother doesn’t seem to think it’s an issue for them to pick his kids up from school and look after them as normal. They might not be 70 but is it really worth the risk?

[Boydy]

https://thehill.com/policy/technology/488037-amazon-suspending-shipments-of-non-essential-items-to-warehouses

Amazon suspending shipment of 'non-essentials' to its warehouses in the US and UK. And hiring more staff.

[Luke Emia]

I started off worried about redundancy, but on reflection there are two useless corpses beside me who could go first, and I churn through work and speak languages.

Not going to make any progress against the mortgage for a long time now, though.

The amount of people I’ve had asking about payments etcetera is mind boggling. People aren’t even not working yet. In addition the three months the interest will still roll up. It’s going to be one of them situations I see where people just take the payment holiday even if they don’t need it.

[Boydy]

I picked up a click and collect order from Tesco this morning and even though I fixed anything that was unavailable at like 10pm last night there was still some stuff that wasn't fulfilled and other stuff that was substituted.

The guy giving me my stuff also said they'll probably be stopping click and collect soon.

Probably gonna have to do my next shop at like 3am on a Tuesday.

1240019184840593408

I guess not.

[Jimmy Floyd]

For all our government response has been a bit confused (I don't fucking blame them in many respects), I am glad I am not subject to Donaldinho or the American state.

[Disco]

1239534336996761609

[bruhnaldo]

Kevin Durant has it. Which is basically the NBA equivalent to like Paul Pogba.

[Giggles]

Kevin Durant has it. Which is basically the NBA equivalent to like Paul Pogba.
Lazy and useless?

[mugbull]

1239534336996761609

The English language if you replaced every full stop with "Now"

[Giggles]

1240020328119705600

[Boydy]

Yev's been very quiet today.

[Giggles]

Yev's been very quiet today.

Was there a drop in deaths?

[ScousePig]

As others have said, schools seem to be gearing up for an announcement soon, most likely Friday. This allows two weeks until the fortnight Easter break for most. What nobody seems to have a clue about is whether we're looking at four weeks or closer to 12.

Our head has outlined the different stages (five in total) our school will go through, mainly through lack of staffing. My year group will be the last to go, and I'm officially 7th in line to be running the school if necessary :D I've drawn up a timetable and plans that can keep the children busy for weeks if necessary.

[Magic]

The GF is potentially moving in, given her sole trader business is about to fold, and her other employment at the local college probably won't be paying her wage shortly.

[Giggles]

The GF is potentially moving in, given her sole trader business is about to fold, and her other employment at the local college probably won't be paying her wage shortly.

Happy enough?

[Spikey M]

Working from home as much as possible from Monday. Will have to go in to prep for court hearings and evictions but otherwise I'll be at home.

[Jimmy Floyd]

My jury service hasn't been cancelled yet, speaking of courts. Love to see how they're going to contrive to make that happen.

[Queenslander]

Scomo has banned us from travelling overseas.

[Spikey M]

My jury service hasn't been cancelled yet, speaking of courts. Love to see how they're going to contrive to make that happen.

They'll be closing soon. With the schools probably.

[Magic]

Happy enough?

Yeah, for sure. I offered, I was worried this was for the wrong reasons (save money etc) but on reflection it's absolutely for the right reasons (looking out for one another, mutual support, hard times, catastrophic circumstances).

[Baz]

Hoping tomorrow is my last day in work for a long time. :drool:

[Spikey M]

My wife has had a massive barney with her manager tonight. Some bloke she works with said in their WhatsApp group chat that he had 'the Flu' last week but then came back into work on monday. He skated through his back to work without issue.

She's pulled her manager up on it and he's basically said that it's no issue because 'he said he had the Flu, not CoronaVirus.' He also said the rules about self isolation weren't until Monday evening.

She spoke to another manager afterwards who has obviously seen what a potentially major fuck up this is, and the bloke in question is being told first thing to get himself tested. Its possible a major Supermarket in Southend could be shut down as it's put both staff and customers at risk.

Someone's getting sacked in the morning.

[Queenslander]

Scomo has told the massive amount scum in this country to stop hoarding and stop abusing service staff especially at testing facilities. We need a fucking purge!

[Yevrah]

Only 16 deaths today, maybe we are a bit behind.

[Spikey M]

Aaaand my cousin has it.

She's a teacher. Has all the symptoms. Locked down for 14 days. I had 5 people on the phone to me today also claiming to be locked down (the job I do, at least 3 of them are liars). This shit is amping up .

[Yevrah]

Yev's been very quiet today.

Had to do a load of work and then had a nap this evening. Only a day in and my sleeping patters are already fucked.

[Luca]

WFH naps :drool:

Truly one of the revelations of this crisis.

[Boydy]

Aggressive testing helps Italian town cut new coronavirus cases to zero (https://www.irishtimes.com/news/world/aggressive-testing-helps-italian-town-cut-new-coronavirus-cases-to-zero-1.4205354?mode=amp)

[Queenslander]

Woolworths are now limiting 2 of each item per person.

[SincereTheRebel]

Any signs of this evolving?

[Yevrah]

Just a few....

[Queenslander]

Secruity now at the entrance and patrolling the local Coles and Woolworths...

Aussie aussie aussie...

[John Arne]

In the Deaths per Population league table (nations over 550 cases only), Italy continue to lead the way, over 3.5x more than second placed Iran.
Iran aside (2nd), European nations dominate the Top 6.

https://gyazo.com/7daf0519b7e739ebc899b26b5f6c986b.jpeg

[Queenslander]

We are going jump ten spots within a week/fortnight. A person in WA went straight back to work at an age care after returning from overseas only to be tested positive.

[randomlegend]

That immunosuppressed friend of mine tested positive. Really worried about her but she seems to be doing okay so far.

[Yevrah]

Anecdotal admittedly, but in my circle of friends I'm hearing some shocking stories of people they know (seemingly both young or very old) who're behaving like this isn't happening.

"I don't need to isolate as I'm in a low risk group and am only socialising with people who've made the same choice" is one common one I keep hearing.

I suspect we'll be moving up the league table very quickly with that approach.

[SvN]

"We're all going to get it anyway, may as well get it over with" is another one I keep hearing.

[Andy]

Anecdotal admittedly, but in my circle of friends I'm hearing some shocking stories of people they know (seemingly both young or very old) who're behaving like this isn't happening.

"I don't need to isolate as I'm in a low risk group and am only socialising with people who've made the same choice" is one common one I keep hearing.

I suspect we'll be moving up the league table very quickly with that approach.

We area country full of selfish fucks.

[Ian]

My sister's work there are a bunch of people who could be working from home (including my sister, who is also asthmatic and therefore I assume more at risk of serious illness if she does get this) but they won't let them because it wouldn't be "fair" on the people (i.e. people who take inbound calls) for whom nothing's been set up to WFH yet. So rather than do what they can to reduce the odds for everybody they're just making everybody go in.

[Spikey M]

I'd just fake a cough and a temperature and self isolate for 2 weeks if I were her.

[Smjffy]

We've had so many cancellations for people staying in the hotel that I didn't even need to go in and do breakfast this morning. If I look at on the balcony though the only people I see walking around are oldies.

I would much rather we just got closed but then I'd be losing hundreds a week as SSP is less than a £100 a week isn't it?

[Andy]

We've had so many cancellations for people staying in the hotel that I didn't even need to go in and do breakfast this morning. If I look at on the balcony though the only people I see walking around are oldies.

I would much rather we just got closed but then I'd be losing hundreds a week as SSP is less than a £100 a week isn't it?

£95 a week SSP.

Luckily I get £220 if I'm off ill, it's a CIJC working rule which seems more sensible and fair. £95 a week is a joke.

My friend is a chef and his whole team have been made temporarily redundant.

[Magic]

If your work closes would you qualify for SSP as you aren't sick?

[Spikey M]

If your work closes would you qualify for SSP as you aren't sick?

No. Only if you're self isolating

[Andy]

If your work closes would you qualify for SSP as you aren't sick?

Depends if the government tells them to close I think.

[Spikey M]

Depends if the government tells them to close I think.

I BELIEVE It's UC if your work closes. It's only SSP/ESA if you can't go into work due to self isolating.

[Magic]

See all these cunts that are going to 'fold' to keep money then re-open, they can fuck off if they think they'll be getting any business when this blows over. :thbup:

[Andy]

I BELIEVE It's UC if your work closes. It's only SSP/ESA if you can't go into work due to self isolating.

What's UC? Universal credit?

[Magic]

Unified Communications. Teams, Zoom, Slack etc.