The Cricket Thread

[Ian]

We need rid of Pant here. I just assume he's going to rattle off a quick 150 before lunch.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If they get 400 I think we're done.

[Ian]

100%.

I'm worried enough about what we'd do in response to THIS score and they're definitely gonna add at least 50.

[Luke Emia]

15-0. It's going well so far.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This could be an innings yet.

[thommo]

Annoying that we've gifted two wickets to the most average bowler they play.

[Ian]

Hameed. :(

[Gray Fox]

Is it too much to ask for someone other than Root to do a bit of batting?

[Ian]

Yes, and you know it is.

[Ian]

Strauss just asked Mel Jones if she ever played at Lords. She said she did once, that Australia were looking to finish a 5-0 clean sweep of Ashes ODIs. She didn't get the chance to bat but she was excited to come out and field but then she was chasing one down the slope, pulled her hamstring and was out of the game.

Strauss: "Oh.... well, I'm sorry I brought it up." :D

[Gray Fox]

That felt annoyingly predictable.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Siraj is straight out of the Sreesanth mould isn't he? Made me hate him in record time.

[Max Power]

Really like Dinesh Khartik. Swear he’s been here since like early May as well covering all sorts on Sky.

[Ian]

Yeah Karthik's really good. Speaks well, seems to know what he's on about, balanced and does the chit chat with the other presenters well. I'd be interested to see how much he gets stuck into India if they were having a shocker but we won't be seeing that this series I fear.

Sky consistently pick people for their coverage really well.

[Max Power]

Yeah Mel Jones also an inspired pick.

God Root is so good, wonder how many more runs he’d have got in a more functioning batting line up in the last few years.

[Ian]

Yeah Mel Jones is good, did they not have another woman presenting as well as Ebony Rainford-Brent too at one point? Was Isa Guha on Sky or just TMS?


God Root is so good, wonder how many more runs he’d have got in a more functioning batting line up in the last few years.

And if he wasn't captaining this rabble, and if he hadn't been shuffled about the order, and...

[Ian]

Good innings but I feel like Bairstow's chucked that one away. At least it wasn't an LBW he refused to believe, I suppose.

Could really do with Buttler hanging about.

[Ian]

Rooooot. :cool:

[niko_cee]

Deep Dasgupta [Former India wicketkeeper on BBC Test Match Special]

I'm just thinking a little outside the box here. Do England take their small lead and declare and make India bat for five or six overs?

No mate, no they don't.

[Kikó]

Thinking outside the box here.

[niko_cee]

Very much hoping for a full on Anderson onslaught tomorrow.

You can't even really say rolling back the years, seeing as he's almost better now than ever before.

[Dquincy]

Very much hoping for a full on Anderson onslaught tomorrow.

You can't even really say rolling back the years, seeing as he's almost better now than ever before.

I wouldn't say he is better now than ever before, but he's still our best bowler, which is a worry.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think he's at least as good now as he has ever been.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bumrah can fuck off with his deliberate no balls trying to hurt Anderson, btw. Nasty cricketer and umpires weak for not doing him under 41.

[Queenslander]

Jimmy Anderson is such a legend. What are his chances of touring at the end of the year? I'd love to see him at the Gabba one last time.

[Queenslander]

Apparently the Brisbane showground will be upgraded for AFL and Cricket while they demolish and rebuild the Gabba.

The ground last hosted Australia v England in Test Cricket in 1928.

Quite possible the coolest temporary home in Australian sporting history.


Queensland's 1876 Intercolonial Exhibition


"Brisbane Showgrounds - Wikipedia" https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brisbane_Showgrounds

[Ian]

Jimmy Anderson is such a legend. What are his chances of touring at the end of the year? I'd love to see him at the Gabba one last time.

He'll bowl as long as he's fit. We certainly won't be choosing not to play him.

[Queenslander]

Good news for me.

[Ian]

And for us because Christ knows what happens when he retires. Nothing good.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've not seen anything in Anderson's quotes that suggests he doesn't want to play on for years yet.

[thommo]

Bumrah can fuck off with his deliberate no balls trying to hurt Anderson, btw. Nasty cricketer and umpires weak for not doing him under 41.

I wasn't able to watch at all yesterday and there's no mention of this in the media - what actually happened?

[igor_balis]

Yeah I'm bored of hearing about Andrew Strauss's dead wife now.

[Ian]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/58224847

That is a beaut' from Moeen in the video at the top.

[Luke Emia]

We’ve done well to still be in with a chance of winning this going in to day 5. If we do go to Australia let’s hope Root isn’t using up all his runs now as he’s going to need them.

[Ian]

We either need to get these out basically immediately (not that I trust us even to chase this) or start bowling underarm if it starts to get away from us.

Nice delivery from Robinson though and I loved the boundary from Pant where he just absolutely thrashed it.

EDIT: That shot from Sharma. :D He had no clue where that was going. Not sure he was even looking at it by the time he connected.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't trust us to chase anything over 200 here. Absolute wizardry from Root to have us in this position in the first place.

[Ian]

I love watching England trying to get tailenders out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Wouldn't mind seeing a couple of 'accidental' flat ones when Jasprit comes in.

[niko_cee]

I thought the same to myself the other day. Be a crying shame to nail him with a full bunger at 9 down.

[niko_cee]

Jimmy effectively fielding at long stop, not something you often see in professional cricket.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Concussion test, ah, what a shame.

[Ian]

Masterful stuff, this.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What I'm really looking forward to is when the target is about 241 and we decline the invitation to have a go at it.

[Ian]

I'm sure Sibley will crank up the pace in response and try to get one, maybe two runs per session.

[Max Power]

This is destined for them to go off for bad light at 5:45. England require 40 and India 3 wickets.

[Ian]

India presumably not bothered about winning either unless they're just assuming we'll collapse in a heap which isn't entirely unlikely.

But they can't possibly think we're going to try and chase down 250+ between lunch and home time.

[Jimmy Floyd]

India's best chance of winning was to get bowled out half an hour ago.

[Gray Fox]

I look forward to England batting for the draw and still losing because only Root can really bat.

[Ian]

100%.

EDIT: This was meant in response to Jimmy but works for Fox as well.

[Luke Emia]

Cracking start. Just read on the Beeb that is Burns 5th duck this calendar year, they said that is tied for the most in a year. Its only August and there hasn't been much cricket this year that's a hell of an effort.

[Ian]

I haven't checked to see if this feeling is correct but I feel like Burns either gets a decent score or bugger all.

Getting the full experience today though aren't we? Brief positivity, big wicket, getting taken round the ground by two proper tailenders, openers shit their pants. England.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Numbers 9 and 10 both getting their Test best scores, following by our openers both out for ducks, is peak Shit England.

I say Shit England because it's a very different proposition from England, and hasn't been seen properly in the wild since about 2001.

[Ian]

Ah, piss. I really want Hameed to do well. :(

[thommo]

Decision felt very harsh. Ishant Sharma, one lanky bugger, hitting him above the knee roll outside the crease? Very surprised it was given and even moreso that it had it clipping the top of the stumps.

[Ian]

Yeah as with an Umpire's Call it never feels fun when it goes against you. At first glance I did just think "Oh that's close." It's a shame, I thought after a nervy start he looked like he was starting to get to grips with things a bit even if he hadn't turned it into many scoring shops yet.

[Gray Fox]

I, for one, am shocked that anyone would dare give Bairstow out LBW.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There is a very plausible chance that India could win this without having dismissed Joe Root in the match, and if so, he should drop all ten of the others and replace them with new players for the next game.

[Ian]

I, for one, am shocked that anyone would dare give Bairstow out LBW.

It is astonishing, though the whole thing isn't quite the same when the other team reviews to overturn an on-field not out.

[Ian]

Bumrah getting right up to Root for some fist-pumping there. Has he always been this chippy and I've just never noticed or is it everybody being arsey because of the business with him and Anderson?

[Kikó]

Are there many worse at test cricket than England?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yep. France, Russia, Japan. Ghana. The list goes on.

lol Virat.

[Ian]

You say that but we don't play Russia very often. How would Bairsy get on with a rock hard wicket in the steppes?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I sometimes wonder what the cricket characteristics would be of various non cricket playing nations, if they played. Germany would have loads of Stuart Broad-esque tall blond quicks, and win all the time. Spain would have a stylish middle order batsman nicknamed 'El Matador' and all shout 'vamos' when they took a wicket.

Egypt would have loads of bastard spinners and travel poorly. Italy would have a cheat wicketkeeper who would go andiamo, andiamo ragazzi into the stump mic ad infinitum.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We may be losing this but there is nothing like a Test match fifth day finish with a crowd in.

[Ian]

"Root denied that England's tactics were a response to Bumrah peppering James Anderson with short-pitched bowling on the third evening."

It might not have affected our tactics but I felt it played into the bowling in that Shami / Bumrah partnership. I think they thought if they roughed them up with some short stuff they'd crumble and get out. When that didn't happen it looked like it took the wind out of our bowlers a little which then combined with Root's odd decisions let that pair get away from us.

[Luke Emia]

It might not have affected our tactics but I felt it played into the bowling in that Shami / Bumrah partnership. I think they thought if they roughed them up with some short stuff they'd crumble and get out. When that didn't happen it looked like it took the wind out of our bowlers a little which then combined with Root's odd decisions let that pair get away from us.

That's probably the biggest reason why he shouldn't be captain. Whilst he has been how many times have we been twatted about for 70/80 runs by a couple of tail-enders at the end of an innings?

[Ian]

I saw that he's got our joint-most wins as England captain with Vaughan however he's also got our third-most defeats (he's captained one more test than Vaughan and lost eight more games) and days like yesterday where we can't bat through two sessions are part of the reason, plus the aforementioned inability to reign in fucking Shami and Bumrah.

Of course he's not helped by having dreadful batsmen around him but it feels like the wins under root have come when the stars align and a handful of players manage to have a good game at the same time rather than through how the match is managed or by design.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's not a thinking captain. Only in the job because he's our best player. He does do the statesman stuff very well, but I don't think he really thinks about the game like the best captains do.

You could say the same about Kohli, as it happens.

[Ian]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/aug/17/england-short-of-options-to-bolster-their-brittle-batting-lineup

Among top- and middle-order batsmen across the past 12 months of all Test-playing nations only Zimbabwe and Afghanistan average more ducks per match than England. While Root is in the batting form of his life, averaging 65.30 across 21 innings over the past year, the rest of England’s top seven are collectively averaging only 20.40, less than half of New Zealand’s 42.42 and by a margin the worst record in the world.

Ace.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They need to basically rip this team apart and start again, possibly by including a couple of old greybeards from the county circuit as bridging players, although they won't do this because it would mean admitting everything they've done for the last two years has been a waste of time.

[Ian]

I assume what they'll actually do is just keep on absorbing the punishment because we need "continuity" for the Ashes, at which pointed we'll continue getting fucked to death.

What further tests do we have between India and Dahn Undah?

[Jimmy Floyd]

None. We have the World T20.

[Ian]

Wonderful.

Is there much red-ball cricket in that time for those not involved in the T20? I've no idea when the county championship runs these days.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There is another run of red ball games at the end of the season, yes. 4 more rounds plus the final. If anyone stacks them up in those games they will be in position for a berth to have a miserable 4 month tour of Australia.

[Ian]

Is there anybody you expect to be in the running? Or people you'd particularly like to see?

I'll be interested to see what, if anything, they do for the next test. Hameed up to open for a test or two (for Sibley I'd guess?) and somebody in at 3?

[Jimmy Floyd]

My guess would be Malan in for Sibley and Hameed to open, but I have a feeling that James Vince might be in the frame too. Curran probably out for Overton, which makes us more racist but probably doesn't improve much on the field.

I'd like to see Saqib Mahmood play but I'm not sure he will.

[Ian]

I've heard the doom-klaxon that is the name 'James Vince' mentioned in a few places and am not happy about it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This sounds just great: https://www.espncricinfo.com/story/azeem-rafiq-calls-on-ecb-politicians-to-intervene-after-yorkshire-delay-publication-of-racism-report-1273989


ESPNcricinfo has seen much of the evidence and is aware of some of the conclusions. Among the witness statements are reports of multiple Asian players claiming they were called 'smelly Paki' and a Yorkshire captain routinely using the word 'nigger.' More than one age-group coach also reports they were told not to select too many Asian youngsters in their side.

[Ian]

So is this delay just them trying to work out who's expendable that they can get rid of to cover the arses of everybody else?

EDIT: Hang on:


Yorkshire's issue is that the enquiry - which they claim was independent, but was actually paid for by the club and carried out by individuals chosen by the club

What?

I love when organisations investigate themselves for wrongdoing.

[Ian]

Sibley and Crawley oot, Malan in so I suspect your top-order prediction was right, Jimmy. And no James Vince yet, thank the lord.
Cord pointed out to me yesterday that cricket's most memorable man, Barry Gallance, has England's highest average from players capped after Joe Root with over 37. 37! And yet he wasn't good enough apparently. What a time that must have been.

[Ian]

Also I like old articles: Hobbs finally breaks WG Grace’s record for first-class hundreds – archive, 1925 (https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/aug/19/hobbs-breaks-wg-grace-record-for-first-class-hundreds-cricket-1925)

[Jimmy Floyd]

In an interview at Taunton last night Hobbs said :— “I want to pay a tribute to Sandham, who played a wonderfully unselfish game and nursed me with great skill. But for him I should not have been near a century when Surrey obtained the required number of runs.”

Between that and the keeper 'failing to whip the bails off' when he was on 97, all sounds totally legit.

[niko_cee]

I recently made an incursion into the east sussex/kent border region and was staying near Newenden, which had a great little cricket pitch. It was pretty tiny and bordered on 3 sides variously by a river with plentiful amounts of pleasure craft, paddle boarders and other aquatic targets, a row of houses with their cars parked out front and a busy road with frequently queued traffic due to the presence of a narrow bridge. No more than a 50 metre hit to get involved with any of the above. Their insurance policy probably takes up 90% of their annual budget. I was particularly taken by this sign:

https://i.ibb.co/0n53ZzW/Cricket-Sign.jpg (https://ibb.co/Twy5RNn)

I never new 'heads' was an internationally recognised warning cry [of course I have heard/used it] in the style of golf's 'fore' but I like it.

Ever made it down that way Jimmy?

[Ian]

Mark Wood to miss the third test.

Wonderful. I'd like to see Mahmood get a go.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I recently made an incursion into the east sussex/kent border region and was staying near Newenden, which had a great little cricket pitch. It was pretty tiny and bordered on 3 sides variously by a river with plentiful amounts of pleasure craft, paddle boarders and other aquatic targets, a row of houses with their cars parked out front and a busy road with frequently queued traffic due to the presence of a narrow bridge. No more than a 50 metre hit to get involved with any of the above. Their insurance policy probably takes up 90% of their annual budget. I was particularly taken by this sign:

https://i.ibb.co/0n53ZzW/Cricket-Sign.jpg (https://ibb.co/Twy5RNn)

I never new 'heads' was an internationally recognised warning cry [of course I have heard/used it] in the style of golf's 'fore' but I like it.

Ever made it down that way Jimmy?

Never been down there, or at least not for cricket purposes. Too busy being sent into the arse end of south Croydon. Balls flying out of grounds are a bit of a problem for rec cricket these days, as far more sixes are hit than there ever used to be (even by shit players), and also there is the scourge of homeowners moving into places next to cricket grounds and then crying foul that balls end up flying into their back gardens. There is no force in the universe so powerful as the British homeowner.

[Ian]

Senior ECB executives to share £2.1m bonus despite Covid job cuts
(https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/aug/23/senior-ecb-executives-to-share-21m-bonus-despite-covid-job-cuts)

Always a good look, this sort of thing.

You gots to have them retention tools for key senior leaders though.

[Ian]

Apparently England only need 16 more ducks from our remaining 6 tests this year to break our record for test ducks in a calendar year.

Easy. :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

My spies tell me all is not well at the ECB, but then they've been saying that for years and look where we are.

[Ian]

Not well in any new / interesting ways or just the ways in which you'd expect?

[Jimmy Floyd]

The verdict is that the Hundred is going to completely bollocks the equilibrium of the domestic game, due to Hundred-hosting counties having a massive cash influx from matchdays and being able to use it to hoover up basically anyone good from non Hundred counties. That will create an environment in which strong cricket centres like Essex, Somerset, Sussex, Kent wither away over time as they won't be able to keep their good players or crowds. ECB's relentless focus on marketing to large cities / focusing on the Asian population (who are basically on board as it is) will end up shrinking the game but because they are run mainly by ex IMG people who judge themselves solely on the size of TV deals, they won't care.

It's a proper mess waiting to happen. You can already see in the state of the England Test team how much ECB care about that (barely at all). Coming out with that line about key leader retention in the current climate is a signal of a complete tin ear.

Meanwhile if my club registers a child under the ECB All Stars programme (starting kids in cricket), from the child's £40 fee for our trained volunteers providing the coaching, £5 is kept by us and £35 goes to the ECB coffers. Their priorities are completely screwed because they know nothing.

Grass roots cricket here is amazingly strong but ECB is currently run by very bad people.

[Ian]

*run by key senior leaders.

[Max Power]

Overton over Mahmoud. A victory for racism and mediocrity.

[Jimmy Floyd]

And how fitting at a ground that is very much the home of cricket racism.

[Ian]

I assume they're hoping his gammony tendencies will fire him up because he'll want the pesky Asians to go back where they came from.

EDIT: "From Emerald Headingly." :sick:


And how fitting at a ground that is very much the home of cricket racism.

Overton: "The REAL home of cricket."

[Max Power]

Jimmy you absolute beauty.

[Ian]

Obligatory "when he retires we may as well give up" post #1376.

[Ian]

:cool:

[Max Power]

Ha! Virat! Stick that up your dojo.

Anderson running riot on a sunny morning - the greatest.

[Jimmy Floyd]

629. Could he get to Murali? 171 more. It's an ask. 77 to match Warne.

[Ian]

Warne feels doable. Murali would be some going.

[Danny]

Going be great watching us let this last pair put on 50 before surrendering a first innings lead.

[Jimmy Floyd]

India well on top here.

[Ian]

Yeah I'm a bit worried about the 30 run lead they'll have when they come back in to bat their second innings.

[Max Power]

130 all out, Root 78*

[Ian]

Bold prediction to assume we'll get 40 extras, Max.

[Gray Fox]

My eyes are seeing the score here and my brain is refusing to process this information.

A good opening, being built on well, Root not having to come out 10 overs in. Someone other than him with a 50. What madness is this?

[Max Power]

Century opening partnership does truly signal end times. Great day.

[niko_cee]

I love that even given the state of the game we have a night watchman ready to go.

[niko_cee]

I've not seen any of this today, what were conditions like early? I'm not sure there's another ground in the world where it can go from 78 all out to serene batting conditions in such a short space of time. I still have bad memories of us being rolled by South Africa in the morning gloom, only for the sun to come out for 2 days whilst they compiled a massive total, before rolling us again for not a lot when the gloom duly returned.

[Jimmy Floyd]

India have us right where they want us.

[Luke Emia]

Fucking hell! That’s all.

[niko_cee]

I loved this bit of the BBC livetext:


39 overs
Eng 108-0
Lead by 30

India and Mohammed Siraj are unhappy as a little pink ball works its way onto the outfield. They complain to Richard Kettleborough at square leg who just kicks it back into the boundary rope.

Siraj walks down to the Western Terrace and signals 1-0 with his fingers.


:D

How daft do you have to be to do that?

[thommo]

I've not seen any of this today, what were conditions like early? I'm not sure there's another ground in the world where it can go from 78 all out to serene batting conditions in such a short space of time. I still have bad memories of us being rolled by South Africa in the morning gloom, only for the sun to come out for 2 days whilst they compiled a massive total, before rolling us again for not a lot when the gloom duly returned.

Conditions were fine, a little bit of cloud but the sun was peeking through in the opening overs. We just bowled very disciplined lines to tie them down. Pant played a particularly stupid shot (classic Pant, I'm still not sold on him being the 2nd coming of Gilchrist), but Jimmy was the key to it all with a truly brilliant opening spell.

Very much shades of Melbourne 2010 today. Trent Bridge 2015 also very similar but we had lost wickets by the close of play in that match. Bloody hell, we were actually 274-4 at the end of Day 1 in that one, that'd be a decent day's work even if we hadn't bowled them out for 60.

[Ian]

Not that Siraj was being chippy about it.


I've not seen any of this today, what were conditions like early?

It was swinging nicely. Not round corners or anything but doing enough to keep our bowlers very happy. And as Thommo said, much more disciplined bowling than we normally do helps.

Also:

I'm not sure there's another ground in the world where it can go from 78 all out to serene batting conditions in such a short space of time.

The reverse of this happens all the time in our games it's just usually England making it look that way not our opposition.

[Ian]

Neesham fending off angry asians (they seem to be the only people who Tweet him) and anti-vaxxers today.

Fighting the good fight.

[Dquincy]

Overton over Mahmoud. A victory for racism and mediocrity.

A decent decision, evidently. :harold:

[Max Power]

Getting rid of India’s tail clearly sufficient to cancel out unrepentant racism.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't really want anything out of today except a Hameed hundred.

[Ian]

Yeah I was genuinely delighted when he got to 50 and would love him to get to a century.

But of course he and Burns will both be out by 11.04.

[Dquincy]

Getting rid of India’s tail clearly sufficient to cancel out unrepentant racism.

https://img.memecdn.com/chip-on-the-shoulder_o_2138721.jpg

[Luke Emia]

I think it's just a delight for Joe Root not to be coming in at 30/3 after 15 overs. In other news today could be the perfect day where the stars align for the Bairstow/Buttler/Moeen counter-attack.

[Jimmy Floyd]

630/3 dec, bowl them out for 100 again with the seamers, Moeen tfc.

[Max Power]

Ted Dexter gone. From what I read I feel he would have been my favourite player if I were a youngster in the early 60s.

[Ian]

I see Kohli's batting average last year and this (so 11 tests, I think) is pretty shit.

I assume even if that continues he's basically untouchable if the results keep coming?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I remember once listening to a fascinating passage of radio commentary from the 60s (with John Arlott etc) in which I think it was the first ever one day final at Lord's, and Dexter's Sussex team were playing. The concept of, say, a bowler having a limited number of overs he could bowl, or the batsmen needing to get on with it because they only had so many balls/overs left and there was no draw available, were completely new things and had blown the commentators' minds. Obviously Dexter had it all worked out and his mob took the win.

It felt like a bigger shift for them than anything like T20/Hundred has been for us.

[Ian]

So am I reading too much into this / coming to a nonsensical conclusion or did Burns really benefit from having somebody at the other end trying to also get some runs on the board? I feel like normally he either finds his way into the match and starts getting runs early or just gets out having done nothing but with Hameed there doing a bit (rather than Sibley just blocking everything) it allowed him to feel his way into the innings a bit more and get his eye in. At one point he was 15 runs off 55 or something which I feel he perhaps doesn't get the luxury of a slow start because he knew Sibley was unlikely to pick up the slack and felt the pressure to score.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There might be something in that, as long as we don't follow it down the 'logical' path which led them to think Jason Roy would be a good choice to open our 2019 Ashes batting.

[Ian]

Roy and Hales. Both freeing each other up to really go for it, 350-0 by tea every day, Ashes secured.

[Max Power]

Root is batting on a different planet atm. Imperious.

[niko_cee]

In a nice intersection of topics I enjoyed some heads have gone viewing today seeing the [lady] camera operator 100ft up in the air on the crane, on her own, wearing a face mask.

[Ian]

. In other news today could be the perfect day where the stars align for the Bairstow/Buttler/Moeen counter-attack.

:rosebud:

[niko_cee]

Got to be worth 30 minutes at them here.

[Luke Emia]

:rosebud:

Yep… if they didn’t manage it today they are never going to. I think Buttler needs a rest. Bairsy to wicket keep as well surely at this point.

[Ian]

Fooooooakes.

[Gray Fox]

Root looked knackered by the end. Ironic that it's his back after carrying the team recently. Get Jimmy on ice and see how much further it can build tomorrow. India starting 350 down with 3 days to go should be fine if the weather report is clear.

[Clunge]

Somerset vs Lancs was a classic tonight. Off to finals day again.

[Ian]

It's a shame Karthik has to bugger off and train for the IPL. He's been really good this series, comes across well and has good rapport with the other pundits.

[Luke Emia]

I’m thinking we could end up chasing 200 or so here and completely fucking it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

India well on top here.

I knew.

[Max Power]

Will need a cheeky 56* from Lord Joseph Root chasing 143 on day 4.

[niko_cee]

All a carefully laid plan to swell the Yorkshire coffers over the weekend.

[Gray Fox]

At last. Now get into them.

[Gray Fox]

This has been excellent so far.

EDIT: And that's a corker from Moeen.

[Ian]

Mo. :cool:

[Ian]

Given he's such a seething, chippy bastard on the field Kohli does speak well and graciously whenever I hear him.

I suppose it's what you want from your captain to an extent.

Great result though. And for a test that finished before lunch on the 4th day I thought it was quite a fun one with both teams having periods where they were on top.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I was trying to find the clip of Kohli talking about Sachin after the 11 World Cup final (the 'carry him on our shoulders' line) and couldn't do so but in the process I found this four ball run of Sachin playing Brett Lee in an ODI in Australia.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUQPLAlU0Sw

The scenes shown in the Indian fans there are unreal, especially for cricket. Proper going off, in a way I'm not sure they do even for their current heroes.

[Dquincy]

Root has surpassed Michael Vaughan as England's most successful test captain; 27 test wins.

Not sure how many test matches each have captained, but fair play to the fella. A special player.

[Ian]

What was the gist of the Kohli quote, Jimmy? Was it going to totally disprove my point? :D

Dquincy by chance I posted above this the other day.

I saw that he's got our joint-most wins as England captain with Vaughan however he's also got our third-most defeats (he's captained one more test than Vaughan and lost eight more games) and days like yesterday where we can't bat through two sessions are part of the reason, plus the aforementioned inability to reign in fucking Shami and Bumrah.

Of course he's not helped by having dreadful batsmen around him but it feels like the wins under root have come when the stars align and a handful of players manage to have a good game at the same time rather than through how the match is managed or by design.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What was the gist of the Kohli quote, Jimmy? Was it going to totally disprove my point ? :D

No it was going to prove it. Basically just after they won the 2011 World Cup at the Wankhede, Tendulkar was hoisted onto players' shoulders for a lap of honour around the stadium. While this was going on, a fairly young Kohli was pulled aside to do a pitchside interview with I think Nasser Hussain, and came out with the line: 'Well, he has carried the hopes of a nation for twenty years, it's about time we carried him on our shoulders'. I thought it was lovely and respectful and spoke of Sachin in human terms rather than the deification he usually gets/got.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Then there is also this kind of dignity (from yesterday)...

1431681113169149957

:D

[Ian]

:D

Excellent.

[Max Power]

:D

Love that. He could do with showing some of that incredible self control outside his off stump…

[Ian]

Waaaaay.

[Dquincy]

What was the gist of the Kohli quote, Jimmy? Was it going to totally disprove my point? :D

Dquincy by chance I posted above this the other day.

Nice one. :)

[Ian]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/sep/01/pants-attacking-style-is-priceless-but-india-need-him-to-be-more-thoughtful

It was 50 years ago that India won a historic Test at the Oval to seal their first series win on English soil. The hero then was the leg-spinner Bhagwat Chandrasekhar, who took six for 38 in the second innings, leaving India with a target of 173, which they chased down with four wickets to spare, thanks to a team batting effort in which no batsman reached a half century but everyone chipped in.

In the course of that Test match, Indian supporters borrowed Bella the elephant from Chessington Zoo and brought her to the Oval.

https://p.imgci.com/db/PICTURES/CMS/98500/98507.jpg

wat

[Jimmy Floyd]

That shot of the Vauxhall End gives me such childhood nostalgia for my dad taking me to watch Surrey at what was, then, a shithole of a ground. Nowadays you have that glorious stand with full on restaurant facilities, a roof terrace and so on, and about 10x the capacity.

But no loose elephants.

[Ian]

Pope and Woakes in.

Rory Burns, Haseeb Hameed, Dawid Malan, Joe Root, Ollie Pope, Jonny Bairstow, Moeen Ali, Chris Woakes, Craig Overton, Ollie Robinson, James Anderson.

I feel a bit for Curran. He's had an up and down series (second test was poor) but he never seems to get much of a run in the team.

[Jimmy Floyd]

At the moment he's just that sort of player, suits some conditions / availabilities but not others. I feel his career has been a bit stymied by playing loads of white ball, with its prosaic demands. I can't remember the last time he played a Championship game for Surrey. He's still absurdly young, mind, for the experience he has.

I can't get excited about this Overton/Robinson axis of racism, unfortunately. Is that my problem or theirs? I don't know. Woakes, though. Love Woakes.

Pope, yeah, hmm. I fear for him here. Love him, with all my heart, but fear for him.

[Ian]

I can't get excited about this Overton/Robinson axis of racism, unfortunately. Is that my problem or theirs? I don't know.

I don't have an answer but I know what you mean.

[niko_cee]

Since when do you win the toss and bowl at the oval? Has anyone made the right decision on the toss so far in this series?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Winning the toss and bowling at the Oval? Might as well just get them all to swan dive off one of those stupid towers in Nine Elms.

[Max Power]

Bowled beautifully since Woakes came into the attack.

[Jimmy Floyd]

First recorded lunch watchman in Test cricket?

[Max Power]

I figured he’d come in and start playing shots but he’s been very sedate. So yeah, maybe? Strange one.

[Ian]

Yeah I was trying to figure that one out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Maybe a left hander to neutralise the lavish away movement? I dunno. If you're jinks you have to be taking these situations on, surely.

[thommo]

:lol:

Rishabh Pant really is braindead.

[Dquincy]

What the fuck are England doing with this Indian tail? Frustrating.

[Gray Fox]

Great runout there but the catching has been woeful.

[Danny]

Not a ball call to bowl in the end.

[thommo]

In fairness there, we bowled line and length and Thakur got very lucky with some of those mishits.

It wasn't like Lords where we bowled utter tripe at the tailenders.

[Gray Fox]

Not a ball call to bowl in the end.

You've done it now.

All out for 120. Root 73*

[Kikó]

Great start.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It is never a good call to bowl at the Oval. Ever.

[Ian]

I left and we were getting mullered by some bowler, came back to twentysomething-2.

England.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm sorry but nightwatchmen really have to stop. It's absolutely nonsensical and all it does is prove that batsmen are all cowards.

[Kikó]

5 down... desperately need someone to be able to get them to 130.

[Ian]

Hameed's wicket yesterday was pretty ugly. :(

But yeah, it really does seem to all fail without Root. Maybe Bairsy will be inspired by disdain and smash some runs out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E-XMnizVgAIWpXL?format=jpg&name=large

No need to ask who incredulously reviewed this.

[thommo]

With Tests (still) giving you 3 reviews an innings, he almost feels obliged to do so every time he's given out.

[Max Power]

He reviewed it straight away as well!

Such a cracking test match on the cards here, so tight. These two + Woakes could be the difference - get a decent lead and can dictate terms to an extent.

[Ian]

I am literally only here to lol at Bairstow doing the same thing he does every time having checked the score on my phone.

[Kikó]

Two good partnerships today though - I was thinking 50 would be a good lead but if they can stay in for an hour or so more, we might be able to get to 100.

Apologies for the inevitable collapse.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pope, yeah, hmm. I fear for him here. Love him, with all my heart, but fear for him.

72 is enough to declare that love always triumphs over fear.

[Danny]

3.41pm Well, another fascinating session. It was mostly England until Moeen's late aberration

As is traditon. I love Mo but christ he is infuriating.

[Max Power]

So annoying when it’s such a nothing shot - played some absolutely sumptuous strokes beforehand though.

Lead of 100 and we are in the box seat. Any less and I’m worried.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Woakes has batted on long enough for Bumrah to do a calf, now that's proper Test batting.

Anderson hopefully lolling over his grave.

[Max Power]

Woakes at home is a cheat code. Richard Hadlee/Imran Khan eat your heart out

[Gray Fox]

Lead of 100 and we are in the box seat. Any less and I’m worried.

How about 99?


Honestly a lot better than I expected when Root fell. Those 99 should account for the runs the Indian tail gets when we get there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Is this the first home Test with Butcher on the Sky team? He should get the permanent promotion, he's a don.

[Ian]

Is this the first home Test with Butcher on the Sky team? He should get the permanent promotion, he's a don.

He's ace. Was always good on the neutered Verdict too. Get him in, get Dinesh back, bin off... I dunno, Nick Knight?

[niko_cee]

'Finely poised'.

Has there ever been a more certain portent of crushing defeat?

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's ace. Was always good on the neutered Verdict too. Get him in, get Dinesh back, bin off... I dunno, Nick Knight?

I wouldn't be against pensioning off Bumble, tbh, and revoking Shane Warne's UK entry visa.

[niko_cee]

Thereby leaving him stateless? Or does he have a Bangladeshi great great grandparent?

[Max Power]

Burns ever catch any in the slips for Surrey Jimmy?

[igor_balis]

I'm on a train from Waterloo to Kingston, saw some fella in Surrey training gear on the platform at New Malden who I think was Laurie Evans based on a quick look at photos of their squad. I'm not gonna look up whether or not he's playing a game right now cus I don't want to ruin the most exciting moment of my year.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm on a train from Waterloo to Kingston, saw some fella in Surrey training gear on the platform at New Malden who I think was Laurie Evans based on a quick look at photos of their squad. I'm not gonna look up whether or not he's playing a game right now cus I don't want to ruin the most exciting moment of my year.

It would have been him, he is from there. Probably back at his old club for the last day of the season.

And yes, Max, he does.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Great decision from Wharf on Jadeja, but the subsequent one on Rahane was dogshit. Those ones where batsmen shoulder arms outside off stump are out far, far less often than umpires think they are, it's always peeved me. I almost never give them out.

[Max Power]

This test is just the absolute essence of “perfectly poised”. At so many points in the first 4 days you feel one side is on top and then the next session the balance tips the other way.

[niko_cee]

There's that word again.

[Max Power]

We are cooked here.

[niko_cee]

Still finely poised?

Day 5 ticket holders throwing themselves into the river on Wednesday night, dreaming of one of the great days now.

This has probably been one of the best series for a long time but it hasn't really felt like it for long periods.

[Max Power]

Poised level: nicely

[Kikó]

Not now run out. Not now.

[Max Power]

Getting Root in might not be such a bad thing for the slim hopes of winning the match. Would love us to be 2 or 3 down at tea and have a real dart at it as I feel Kohli might lose the plot a bit in the field.

[Kikó]

Middle order collapse yay.

[igor_balis]

fuck off bairstow

[Max Power]

Bumrah is quality.

[Kikó]

Fucking Nora.

[Gray Fox]

Winning the toss and bowling at the Oval? Might as well just get them all to swan dive off one of those stupid towers in Nine Elms.


It is never a good call to bowl at the Oval. Ever.

:nod:

[Max Power]

India are a better side, but we have had multiple opportunities to win every single Test and let nearly all of them slip. Very disappointing.

[niko_cee]

Toggle Poised Level: OFF

Toggle Defeat Level: CRUSHING

[Kikó]

:moop:

[Gray Fox]

Trying to get out in time for tea. Good on them.

[Dquincy]

I can feel a draw coming on. :drool:

[Dquincy]

Want to know how I can feel it? My erection.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I know Bumrah bowled well but come on. Dropping Curran to remove the rough for our spinner, picking Overton to create a bit more for theirs, then winning the toss and bowling first AT THE OVAL.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFqktHNMmkk&t=01m10s

[Gray Fox]

Amazing :happycry:

[Kikó]

One for Jim.
1435223973403447296?t=pVk1ENCysdvwLR4taK4n8w&s=19

[Danny]

That’s great :lol:

[Jimmy Floyd]

The tone of the commentary is such a recognisable club cricket tone. Absolutely SEETHING, but very heavily disguised as good natured banter, to save face.

[Queenslander]

The heroes at Cricket Australia have cancelled the Afgan test due to the Taliban's treatment of women.

speechless

[Jimmy Floyd]

CA are proper villains these days, possibly more so than the English and Indians, which is some going.

They haven't played an away Test since the 2019 Ashes. Two years and counting.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We've named only Mo and Rash as spinners in our T20 World Cup squad for the UAE (+ 6 seamers). India have named 5 spinners, and 3 seamers.

One of us must be right, eh!!!

[niko_cee]

I have absolutely no idea how accurate this is [as I barely read the article I saw on it] but I like the idea of India trying to have the 5th test cancelled due to covid now that they are ahead in the series.

[Queenslander]

CA are proper villains these days, possibly more so than the English and Indians, which is some going.

They haven't played an away Test since the 2019 Ashes. Two years and counting.

Between them and Warner I just cant be bothered outside of the Ashes the moment. Fleeing the IPL has definitely hurt their image down here as well.


The Ashes is set to be the first major sporting even to require a double jab vaccine passport.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Fifth Test cancelled and India forfeit :cab:

I guess that makes it 2-2.

[Gray Fox]

Finally dropping Bairstow has evidently lead to heads going.

What a win.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Now seems like they haven't forfeited, just cried off and still win 2-1. I have quite a lot of money on them winning the series, so cool, but also, fuck India.

[niko_cee]

Good to see India still can't help themselves when it comes to shithouse behaviour. Lol if they think they can walk away without consequence in terms of the result. Shame as its been a good series and they're a bit more likeable than they have been historically.

[Ian]

Meanwhile Yorkshire have decided to use everybody talking about the test to slip out their report on the racism stuff which I'm sure is just coincidence and they're not trying to bury bad news.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Good to see India still can't help themselves when it comes to shithouse behaviour. Lol if they think they can walk away without consequence in terms of the result. Shame as its been a good series and they're a bit more likeable than they have been historically.

They were trying to get the 5th Test cancelled pre-series to help with IPL preparation, it's an obvious lie. There is no covid outbreak.

[thommo]

All the Indian players tested negative yesterday. How on earth is it possible to get the Test cancelled simply down to "fears" of coronavirus? Oh, and by the way you win the series 2-1. Complete farce, and like Jimmy says, no surprise as the IPL is due to restart in 9 days.

If this is the protocol, we should have cancelled the last 3 Tests in India because we had "fears". 1-0 win away, cracking job chaps.

[Ian]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/sep/15/former-west-indies-bowler-michael-holding-retiring-as-tv-commentator

:(

[Jimmy Floyd]

Shame, but was probably coming as it's said he basically hates modern cricket, and if it makes more room for Butcher in the A team then so be it.

Edged and gone.

[Ian]

Does that apply to test cricket as well, Jimmy? Or just generally the direction the game is heading in?

I'll miss him either way. A voice like a warm bath.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This (and its subsequent parts) is a good watch if you didn't see it at the time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8oMbsglKG0

I once walked past him on the stairs at Trent Bridge and fuck me, you know he's there.

[Ian]

Yeah I saw those and they were great.

Has A Presence, does he?

[niko_cee]

What are the rules here then?

Never seen that before.

[niko_cee]

This Cox chap is having some sort of evening in the field.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What are the rules here then?

Never seen that before.

That flummoxed me as well (I was in the ground so dunno what they said on TV). My best guess was they somehow deemed DBD to be part of taking the catch, even though as far as I could see he was but an entertaining sideshow.

[niko_cee]

Bumble thought they got it wrong, and I think on balance they did. I think that sort of daisy-chain effect is possible in terms of turning a catch into a 6, but they seemed to be suggesting that the person touching the fence had to be doing so whilst in some way assisting the catch, rather than trying to slide tackle the catcher.

[Danny]

1439319551565447168

I didnt see it live so figured I would post it.

Thats out for me.

[Mellberg]

Catch is safe as houses miles before any contact. Daft really.

[niko_cee]

I understand why they've done it, and I don't have a better solution myself, but I really hate the term 'batter'.

Also, as a somewhat casual observer, what the fuck has happened to the County Championship and how long has this current format been in existence?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Since covid, and not for much/any longer.

I hate 'batter' too, don't see why 'batsman' couldn't be gender neutral, but if they have to insist I'd rather 'bat'.

'England bat Heather Knight'. Yeah, I think it works. Ship long since sailed though as it marries up with anodyne coach-speak.

[Giggles]

Batter is for fish and sausages.

What the fuck is wrong with batsman in men’s cricket and batswoman in women’s cricket? Fucking spastics.

[niko_cee]

Having been denied by a team doing the same to them a few years back [Middelsex and Essex?] it'll be interesting if Somerset are good sports and go for [read: try to lose] whatever target they are set by Warwickshire tomorrow.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They probably will. No one likes northerners.

[Dquincy]

1439548982053715969