The Cricket Thread

[ItalAussie]

Out of the batch of talented young batsmen coming though (Smith, Root, Kohli, etc.), I think Kane Williamson may be the most talented of them all. He's lovely to watch, and a class above anyone else in his side.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I watched him last night between 55 and about 110, and he was just bloody wonderful to watch. A couple of the cover drives were of the Cowdrey variety.

Here's a question, who bats 3-6 in the current World XI? A golden era for those sorts of players. Not many openers around, conversely. Or keepers.

[Danny]

Anyone watching the "All Stars" game?

Think I will wait until after and download it from ESPN as I missed the start.

[Davgooner]

I gave up when I saw where it was being played.

[niko_cee]

I watched 1 ball with Ponting needing 7 off 17 and Sachin chucking down some pies.

Looked a disgrace.

Meanwhile I see Pietersen has been going ballistic in the Biltong Bash

[Davgooner]

:face: :face: :face:

[Danny]

Normal service resumed in OD then

[Jimmy Floyd]

Apparently such days are the price we pay for the exciting brand of cricket that England now play. Give me Trott grinding us to 234 any day.

[Davgooner]

We'll still make 350.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We do actually bat to 10 here. Willey to Topley is probably the biggest 10 to 11 dropoff in cricket history.

Also Pakistan are the worst chasers of a target going. And we have Woakes. We can't fail.

[ItalAussie]

We do actually bat to 10 here. Willey to Topley is probably the biggest 10 to 11 dropoff in cricket history.
I started doing some digging, and I think if you take the metric to be average when coming in at 10/11 (6+ innings), the biggest drop off might be Brett Lee (39) down to Glenn McGrath (7).

I realise this is answering a question nobody asked, but that's what cricket statistics are for.

[Jimmy Floyd]

With all due respect to Brett Lee, which is a lot, how on earth did he average 39 over that long a career?

[niko_cee]

Mind blown.

http://www.espncricinfo.com/australia/content/player/6278.html


Oh wait, he didn't. And did he even bat at 10?

Computer also says no to that (majority seems to be 8/9)

[ItalAussie]

Yeah, I wasn't sure how to filter it, so I went with "average when batting at 10", and made the cutoff to be more than five matches. Maybe I should have put it much higher in retrospect. He batted there eight times. It's not the perfect metric, but I wasn't in the mood to pore through scorecards from the 1950's, either.

[Max Power]

Pretty good recovery. Taylor and his biceps are the future.

[ItalAussie]

In terms of long-term 10s, it looks like it might be Peter Pollock (averaged 21 at 10, where he batted in 20 of his 41 test innings) backing onto someone named Pat Trimborn (averaged 6.5 in his four tests, unsurprisingly batting at 11).

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pretty good recovery. Taylor and his biceps are the future.
Literally can't believe we've just had 3 largely shit years without him just because he is short. It's shit like this where Kevin really falls down.

[niko_cee]

Wouldn't this 10 to 11 debate be settled by whoever batted at 10 when Chris Martin was playing for New Zealand?

Or, non-professionally, whoever batted 10 when I used to tinker around at the bottom of the order.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Topley is not very far off Chris Martin I reckon, having seen him flail a couple of times.

This is golden from these two.

[ItalAussie]

Wouldn't this 10 to 11 debate be settled by whoever batted at 10 when Chris Martin was playing for New Zealand?

Or, non-professionally, whoever batted 10 when I used to tinker around at the bottom of the order.
The full list of NZ players who batted at 10 ahead of Chris Martin. I've ordered it by their average at 10, because I'm not sure how to get at their career average.

http://stats.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/stats/index.html?batting_positionmax1=10;batting_positio nmin1=10;batting_positionval1=batting_position;cla ss=1;filter=advanced;orderby=batting_average;playe r_involve=9711;spanmax1=01+Jan+2014;spanmin1=01+Ja n+2000;spanval1=span;team=5;template=results;type= batting

When it was Iain O'Brien, the difference wasn't actually that marked. :D

There's a few occasions where Tim Southee came in at 10 before Chris Martin at 11. Or James Franklin, who only came in at 10 once (0* off one ball faced, if you were interested), but has 21 first-class hundreds, including a double. Has a test century to go with that, too.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That one partnership got 133. The other six partnerships combined, 28.

[niko_cee]

Are they the two shortest players in the team?

[Jimmy Floyd]

You have to say the batting was woefully poor from all concerned there. Never mind, next time we'll get 400.

[ItalAussie]

It's a bit ridiculous to say this when he's sitting on 215 off 245, but Warner has matured incredibly as a batsman. He's more watchful, and is always alert for ones and twos - 77 singles so far in the innings. He's definitely not the slogger he was early in his career.

[Davgooner]

England-esque from the Kiwis. Waking up with the same two batsmen at the crease as when you went to sleep six hours earlier. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I thought New Zealand were meant to have something approaching a fucking clue?

I suppose they did lose to us in a one day series, that takes some real bollocks.

[niko_cee]

To have any chance New Zealand would have had to have played this on a Hobart GREENTOP, and be under the impression they were playing someone other than Australia.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Stone cold classic Jason Roy knock there. 50 and out.

Get him in the Test side just for shits and giggles. Bat him at 9 or something and he can get 34 off 7 balls when the oppo are least expecting it.

[niko_cee]

Didn't even realise we were playing.

[Davgooner]

Hales. :checkit:

270ao from here.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Our inability to hit boundaries borders on the embarrassing. Gone absolutely nowhere since Hales started approaching his ton.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Run rate exactly the same in 49th over as it was in 25th, just four down. Seriously poor stuff.

[Davgooner]

56 off the last ten having had eight/nine wickets in hand is pretty fucking superb.

[niko_cee]

31-3 off 13.

:drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pile on Pakistan.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Or not. Chris Woakes just too good for yet another nation of 300 million.

[Ian]

Did I see earlier that before today's century Alex 'The Next Saviour of England's Test Opening Partnership' Hales had only got two 50s in a load of ODIs?

[niko_cee]

Yeah, I was a bit taken aback by seeing that was his maiden ODI hundred.

[elth]

New Zealand really don't have the bowling when the ball isn't moving through the air. Their young quicks are decent, but reliant on swing. No swing on a hot clear day in Australia, lads...

Warner's just unfair on flat, even Australian pitches.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Fucking hell, Immy T has dropped a proper goober at square leg against India.

South Africa vs spin is evidence that we should just bin off the likes of Jimmy and instead take Fat Sam, Zafar, Mason Crane and possibly Shaun Udal down there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Watching the Aus v NZ highlights now, and Kane Williamson is looking sexual as fuck. My goodness, the timing.

[ItalAussie]

I love Steve Smith, and if I needed a current player to bat for my life under pressure, I'd probably pick him. But Williamson is the most talented young player going around at the moment, no question.

If we remove the age qualification, it might just be Amla/De Villiers ahead of him, to be perfectly honest.

[ItalAussie]

Taylor/Williamson is New Zealand's most prolific ever partnership (in terms of total runs scored), for any wicket. :cab:

Went ahead of Astle/Fleming in this match.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Amla seems to have gone off the boil somewhat (still very good), but obviously AB is a freak show.

I'm on the verge of putting that Test team together.

Cook
Warner
Williamson
Smith*
Root
de Villiers+
Kohli
Ashwin
Wahab Riaz
Steyn
Anderson

I'm still not entirely happy with it, but I really just want to see the look on Virat's face when he's told he's batting seven.

[ItalAussie]

I'd largely agree. Certainly on the batting.

Anderson wouldn't be in my lineup, although I'm not immediately sure who I'd put there instead - maybe Trent Boult, who has actually bowled generally pretty well on this tour, and has generally been New Zealand's best bowler. Actually, I'd probably go Herath and enjoy watching the two spinners play together.

Riaz would be great just for the windup, but I'm not sure I'd trust him in tests to carry a side. Exciting to watch though.


EDIT: I suppose Anderson would have to be in there if it's a three fast bowler lineup though. But that's more of an indictment of the global fast bowling stocks than anything else. Also, give Starc a year or two.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I thought about Rangy but only as an alternative to Trashwin, there's no way I could leave out any of those three seamers. Jimmy doesn't get the rep in some countries but the guy's a bloody colossus. Wahab is just a complete geezer.

I was trying to think of an all-rounder to allow me to leave Virat out but I don't think there is one apart from Angelo Mathews.

[Davgooner]

Anderson has to be in it, no question. He's consistently a beast in almost any conditions these days.

[Max Power]

A world XI without Rangy Herath is invalid, what a man. Him and Angelo for Kohli and Ashwin. Fuck India. I'd probably take Yasir Shah over Ashwin as well at this moment, interested to see how he would go outside Asia.

[Ian]

Not sure that beats this XI, Jim:

This is the side I'd like to see for the Oval:

cord (c + wk)
Martin
Trott
niko
Chinny
Kiko
Max
Dave
Floyd
Swann
Ian

[Danny]

Hurts to this day that I didn't make the squad :(

[Cord]

I'll talk with the selectors when next we meet, but I can't promise anything. You're not short are you?

[Danny]

Taller than JT :moop:

I bowl(ed) filthy leg spin so the selectors will never trust me.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Swann has since retired, so you're in.

[Danny]

:cool:

[niko_cee]

They obviously fancied a 5 day test in Perth for a change.

[Mr. Malik]

In a new low for the Ch.9 commentary team, Ian Healy wanted Ross Taylor to perform an "impromptu haka" upon reaching his century, "a bit of kamate kamate".

[ItalAussie]

They're terrible, and I'll not make any excuses for them.

I've got time for Mike Hussey and Mark Taylor. The rest can go jump.

[Blitz]

In an ideal world, I'd have Bumble, Michael Holding, Robin Jackman and maybe a couple more of the poms commentating every minute of every game.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Loving the Ram Slam. The combination of a few world class players with complete club level turds is what T20 cricket is all about.

There's a bloke here bowling with a double hop off his back foot ffs.

[elth]

Healy was OK for a couple of years after he first started commentating, when he would actually talk about the cricket rather than just letting his mind wander around endless nonsense, but he must have used up whatever brain cells he had left.

Shame, because that Warne/Healy masterclass from the Ashes shows he's still got a brain on him. He just doesn't use it any more.

Ian Chappell's about the best of them left now. I can just about tolerate him and Mark Taylor (depending on who else is in the box with Taylor - he's much worse if it's "Heals" and "Slats".) Alas, ABC Grandstand no longer have the rights to streaming audio in Australia so I can't even listen to some proper commentators.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Commentary is very much our best area in cricket. Bumble is possibly losing his marbles (if he ever had them) but Atherton and Hussain are both just silly good. We have also somehow managed to sell Mark Nicholas to Australia. We must be amazing.

What I'd really like to see though is a 24 hour permanent loop of Nick Knight and Pommie Mbangwa on commentary.

[Max Power]

Got some decent depth as well. The likes of Rob Key and Mark Butcher are itching to make the step up from the county circuit.

[Blitz]

What I'd really like to see though is a 24 hour permanent loop of Nick Knight and Pommie Mbangwa on commentary.

This would drive me to do unthinkable things...

Ian Chappell is also a good call. And I agree with you about commentary being England's best area of cricket.

I actually need to get myself down to a double header at Centurion and give myself a chance at the R1 000 000.

[ItalAussie]

Commentary is very much our best area in cricket. Bumble is possibly losing his marbles (if he ever had them) but Atherton and Hussain are both just silly good. We have also somehow managed to sell Mark Nicholas to Australia. We must be amazing.

What I'd really like to see though is a 24 hour permanent loop of Nick Knight and Pommie Mbangwa on commentary.I don't remember who's who, but I found Sky unbearable during the Ashes when I was over there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The only person you could reasonably find unbearable would be Sir Loin, and even then it's just because he doesn't care how biased he is.

Well, that other than your own contribution in the form of Shane Warne.

[ItalAussie]

Warne wasn't good, but I remember most of the lineup being cringeworthily bad.

[Max Power]

Botham is unbearable but the rest are decent to very good.

[ItalAussie]

Atherton's great, mind.

[Davgooner]

He's a boring twat. Nasser and Bumble. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Atherton is a bloody doyen, although his typical snide northern hatred for Surrey does get on my nerves.

Butcher needs promoting to the full team when Botham, Bumble and Holding hang up their opinions. He's an absolute geezer.

[Luke Emia]

Botham is unbearable but the rest are decent to very good.

Beefy can do whatever he likes.

[Luke Emia]

Personally I love Atherton and Hussain. When Nasser gets going it's a thing of beauty. He doesn't commentate anymore but watching Bob Willis run amok on the verdict has to be one of the best things about cricket.

[Max Power]

Obviously he's an unimpeachable legend of English sport, but he's also the Daily Express in human form and an insufferable bore.

Should never have gone into media. Just do your walks Beef mate, raise some money for some spastics and stop annoying me when I'm trying to watch cricket.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I can put up with Botham because he's that rarest of beasts, a genuine folk hero. He's the national legend that 'Warney' wishes he was.

The other piece of evidence in his favour is that he's lifelong bezzies with IVA Richards, who is probably the greatest man ever to play the game (and not far off greatest player either).

If you were going to put together a desert island commentary sextet for an English Test series you'd have Benaud obviously, Hussain and Atherton, Bumble for light relief, and I'm willing to pay Tony Cozier's air fare. I'd also have Boycott who for my money remains the shrewdest pundit in the game.

The Australians don't really have much going for them now Richie and Greig have gone and they've ushered Bill Lawry into his armchair to make way for the matey banter.

[Max Power]

Why couldn't Botham have gone the Viv route though. Keep it quiet and lowkey post retirement (maybe fuck Allen Stanford off though).

Oh God, now I'm going to watch a shedload of Viv Richards videos on YouTube aren't I?

[Jimmy Floyd]

You should just watch this instead and ruin your youth: http://www.espncricinfo.com/cricket-all-stars-series-2015-16/content/story/941277.html

[Ian]

No Blowers talking about pigeon plumage and succulent buses? :nono:

[Max Power]

You should just watch this instead and ruin your youth: http://www.espncricinfo.com/cricket-all-stars-series-2015-16/content/story/941277.html

Simon Taufel looked dead behind the eyes signalling that six

[Danny]

Shoaib Akhtar in this legends series is reminding me of a pakistani version of Rik Mayall in Bottom to look at.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The aggregate scores in this match are 1,441 for 21. That means 360 for 5 every day. Bowlers taking a pasting. Far too much dick waving for my taste.

[niko_cee]

Producing a properly competitive 5 day pitch must be nigh on impossible these days. Give the bowlers anything and you get 2.5 days of aggressive brand wafting. Give them nothing and you get 4 or 5. It's the run rate as much as anything in that Perth match. Waste of everyone's time. Cue final day collapse, such is the regularity of collapsing these days.

[Davgooner]

Warner gently leaning on a forward defensive and the ball flying straight down the ground to the boundary on the first morning was a sign of things to come. Everything I've listened to since seemed to be pretty tame; boundaries every over.

Set them 350 in a session and a half tomorrow and wait for the ABOC.

[Jimmy Floyd]

In fairness I just think these two teams have gone into a macho singularity. Australia got bummed three times by a deeply ordinary England team because they just couldn't keep their erections down even for brief passages of play. I'm pretty sure Steve Smith actually nicked off with his cock at Trent Bridge, which was one of the poorest team displays in history I would have thought.

Pakistan going there next 'summer', God I hope the great man is still around to sigh at them like a disappointed uncle.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As if to prove my point, Ross Taylor says they'll have a go at any target.

YOU'VE GOT TO BE PREPARED TO LOSE, TO WIN

[ItalAussie]

In fairness I just think these two teams have gone into a macho singularity. Australia got bummed three times by a deeply ordinary England team because they just couldn't keep their erections down even for brief passages of play. I'm pretty sure Steve Smith actually nicked off with his cock at Trent Bridge, which was one of the poorest team displays in history I would have thought.

Pakistan going there next 'summer', God I hope the great man is still around to sigh at them like a disappointed uncle.

So I'm not rising to the obvious baiting here, but I literally have no idea what you're actually going on about.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That's because you're Australian. You need to watch a good few loops of every ball of Alastair Cook's cowardly, negative brand of 28 Test hundreds to get you back to reality.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Actually, I think the World Cup group stage encounter was peak willy waving. My memory of it is every bowler trying to bowl at 150mph and every batsman trying to hit every ball for six, resulting in a total collapse by Australia and then subsequently almost one of the great collapses of all time by New Zealand in a game lacking any sort of finesse or composure.

[Max Power]

I am prepared to draw, to win. But I'll take a draw tbh

[ItalAussie]

There's an objection to aggressive cricket?

I mean, we all know how the World Cup ended.

[ItalAussie]

The more I think about it, the weirder the complaint seems, since it's more based on a stereotype than any reflection of our side at the moment.

As an example, Warner scored a ridiculously high percentage of his first 150 runs in ones, twos and threes. I wouldn't exactly call Smith an imposing batsman, either. Nor Burns. Nor Voges. Nor Khawaja or Nevill. Warner aside, we really don't have any "imposing" batsmen who try and dominate the bowlers.

We have three quicks, two of whom are very physical. But nobody's getting intimidated by Hazelwood or Lyon either, so I'm a little confused really.


EDIT: The same is true of New Zealand. McCullum's the only devastatingly imposing batsman. Taylor and Williamson are incredibly talented. Watling and Guptil are patient stalwarts, and Latham's not intimidating anyone.

For Hazelwood, put in Bracewell. For Lyon, Craig. Southee and Bolt have the intimidating fast bowler thing going on, but like Australia, a pair of fast bowlers and one imposing batsman is as far as it goes.

New Zealand are also basically the nicest team in cricket. What a really baffling objection.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's not an objection. It's an observation.

[Max Power]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGm5BTkUQH0

[ItalAussie]

It's not an objection. It's an observation.

I don't see how it's an observation based on the Australian or New Zealand cricket teams.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Mitchell J is about to retire, they say. In the middle of a series :cool:

[Danny]

He's retired

http://www.espncricinfo.com/australia-v-new-zealand-2015-16/content/story/941569.html

[ItalAussie]

Fairplay to him. He came back, dominated an Ashes, locked down his spot with consistent performance, and won a World Cup. Credit to him for developing into a consistently good bowler, rather than a sporadically amazing/terrible one. We'll miss him, although our stocks in the fast bowling cupboard are pretty good, so it shouldn't be a crisis stations situation.

I'm not sure I'll ever see a series-long bowling performance to rival his in the 13-14 Ashes, and his performance in the South Africa series was almost as good.

[ItalAussie]

This test could still go all three ways. :cab:

[Luke Emia]

He bowls to the left.... Let's remember 10-11 when we talk about him.

[ItalAussie]

http://static.sportskeeda.com/card_images/twitter-reacts-to-mitchell-johnsons-retirement/496185960_1447732770.jpg

I love the guy, and even I didn't expect him to retire on his own terms. He had "playing until he's dropped" written all over him.


http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02758/johnson-reuters_2758739b.jpg

What a series that was. I'll likely never see another series-long fast bowling performance like it.

[Luke Emia]

Someone get the video of him chirping up to Jimmy about taking wickets. Or the first ball golden duck.

In all seriousness though he molested us like a Jimmy Saville victim a couple of winters ago and it was horrific to see. I will be a lot happier that he isn't there when we go back. What's he like? Is he made for TV commentating? Could he replace Warne as the token Aussie for our coverage?

[Max Power]

He is quite an interesting character. Demon fast bowler but also quite fragile and flaky.

The contrast between his best series and his worst are probably the greatest ever seen.

[ItalAussie]

He is quite an interesting character. Demon fast bowler but also quite fragile and flaky.

The contrast between his best series and his worst are probably the greatest ever seen.
His greatest career achievement was probably ironing that out of his game, and turning into a consistently strong performer, rather than a mercurial wildcard.

[niko_cee]

Australia will miss his ability to bowl a horror over (I recall that one in the summer where he took two wickets with balls out of nowhere) more than his tendency to go the other way. Surprised he's chucked it in really, when is the next Ashes series? Is it 2 winters away?

[niko_cee]

That really was an impressive collapse from Pakistan. They just went mental for about 10 overs after being in a reasonably strong position with (almost) 30 gone.

[Max Power]

There's defintely potential for a classic Pakistani heist/insipid England collapse here.

[niko_cee]

Aye, one more any time soon and we'll lose by 100.

[niko_cee]

On a scale of one to Inzamam.

:D

[Jimmy Floyd]

If they get us 5 down for under 150, it's goodnight Rawalpindi.

[Max Power]

This is made for Taylor, if everyone at the other end doesn't get out before he can bustle his way to 70*

[Davgooner]

What a beast. Commentators were fucking seething as those two took the piss.

[Ian]

Wood and Finn both out of the Saffer tour. What happens now? Keep it up with the spinners? Chris Jordan? Woakes? Try out Footitt? The long-awaited introduction of my nondescript-pace filth to the England setup?

[Max Power]

No Bressie, No party

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hold off on Footitt, Surrey haven't had the chance to ruin him yet.

Jade was genuinely immense the last time I saw him bowl. Get him in.

[Davgooner]

Is Tremlett still about? :baz:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Compdog and B to the G earn recalls for South Africa, while Ronald is dropped :(

Plunkett also left out which I find a poor decision. Rashid out, Footitt in, and Jordan in. And Fat Sam lives :cool:

[Max Power]

R.I.P Ronald.

No Plunkett is weird, espeicially at the expense of Woakes who is unbelievably average right down to his stupid regen face. If he plays we are in (more) trouble.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can definitely see them picking Woakes in an inspirational piece of side-balancing selection theatre.

Cook
Hales
Dawg
Root
Taylor
Stokes
Bairstow
Moeen
Woakes
Broad
Anderson

I would actually not be at all surprised if they went with the above. I'd play Gallance ahead of Compton though.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.espncricinfo.com/india/content/story/942247.html

For all their talk and money, they really are a complete joke of a country. The idea that Pakistan or Sri Lanka can't play in certain cities (still a lot of opposition to Pakistan being allowed in at all, apparently) should automatically lose them the hosting rights. And the idea that 4 months from the tournament they are openly still some way from organising a schedule is also absolutely ridiculous.

[Max Power]

There was something about Aleem Dar maybe not umpiring as well. If Pakistan win the thing :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

The Sri Lanka thing is almost more baffling. I didn't know that Angelo Mathews wasn't allowed into Chennai during the last IPL. Absolutely mental.

Maybe we should extend this to our own cricket, and not allow David Warner into Northampton or something.

[Max Power]

Why wouldn't you want Angelo Mathews to play cricket in your city? Bunch of nonces.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Jason Roy is having the career Ali Brown should have had.

Once went to watch Surrey v Glamorgan in the 2nd XI championship and for a time the only four spectators were me, my mate, Ali Brown and Geoff Arnold. Magical sport.

[Davgooner]

Wheels coming off. :cool:

[Davgooner]

Enough wheels stayed on to allow us to accelerate somewhat rapidly.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Is that a series win? Good heavens.

I was trying to think of our great ODI series wins and I can't think of any, not because we haven't had any, but because it just isn't a memorable format. I liked the tri-series format but that seems to have died of late. I remember a 3-3 draw in India about ten years ago which was quite good.

[niko_cee]

Mugging off the Aussies in the "Commonwealth Bank Series" finals 2-0 after being whitewashed in the test series (first time) was quite good.

But yeah, no one really cares about the format outside of the major competitions. Should that be competition?

[niko_cee]

That Buttler innings was a bit mad. He reached 50 off 30 balls, saw off a dot, and then went to 104 in the following 15.

:cab:

[Max Power]

Three fastest ODI centuries by an Englishman are all his!

He's a special talent thats for sure. Way better than that oik Bairstow.

[Danny]

Is that a series win? Good heavens.

I was trying to think of our great ODI series wins and I can't think of any, not because we haven't had any, but because it just isn't a memorable format. I liked the tri-series format but that seems to have died of late. I remember a 3-3 draw in India about ten years ago which was quite good.

Is that the one with Freddie swinging shirt around like a nutter?

[Jimmy Floyd]

One of his shots was like what AB de Villiers does, but better. Absolutely ridiculous. The switch hit thing where he didn't move his feet.

Jroy's straight drive still shot of the day though :cool:

[niko_cee]

Aye, that reverse whatever it was was almost surreal. He barely moved.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As curious scorecards go, this has got to be up there.

http://www.espncricinfo.com/wicb-regional-4-day-2015-16/engine/match/929329.html

My best guess is the boat containing the final three batsmen sank somewhere off Anguilla, but they swam ashore in time to have a bowl.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/content/story/942809.html

Awful stuff. I saw him play numerous times and he was a very handy player, the best such a nation could realistically hope for over the next ten years.

[niko_cee]

What happened to him?

[Jimmy Floyd]

He seemingly had a stroke while batting in extreme heat, fell into a coma for a week and then died. I haven't seen anything more detailed than that.

[ItalAussie]

Is that a series win? Good heavens.

I was trying to think of our great ODI series wins and I can't think of any, not because we haven't had any, but because it just isn't a memorable format. I liked the tri-series format but that seems to have died of late. I remember a 3-3 draw in India about ten years ago which was quite good.

Tri-series were fantastic, but they've been binned because attendance at matches between the two away teams wasn't as high.

The problem now is that the competition is pointless and unmemorable. I swear that cricket is run by late-80s attempts at artificial intelligence.

[Ian]

The Joy of Six does Mitchell Johnson.
http://www.theguardian.com/sport/blog/2015/nov/18/joy-of-six-fearsome-mitchell-johnson-bowling-spells

[Jimmy Floyd]

That spell at Adelaide was proper hide behind the sofa stuff. It all came flooding back on that clip when after the sixth wicket I suddenly saw 'Aus 9/570d' in the corner of the screen.

Their stupid backwards scoring systems just make the rogerings even more brutal.

[Ian]

I'm glad I wasn't watching live during that over in the past series where every ball appeared to be a thing of nightmares. Horrible.

[Danny]

As curious scorecards go, this has got to be up there.

http://www.espncricinfo.com/wicb-regional-4-day-2015-16/engine/match/929329.html

My best guess is the boat containing the final three batsmen sank somewhere off Anguilla, but they swam ashore in time to have a bowl.

http://www.espncricinfo.com/wicb-regional-4-day-2015-16/engine/match/929329.html

Whatever they were trying didn't work.

[niko_cee]

Quite like the sound of this no-toss plan they are bringing in to Div 2. With the way modern pitches are produced (particularly at test level) a bit of leveling (giving the away side the choice of bat, bowl or have a toss) might make for more interesting series.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It smacks of bullshit to me, although Michael Vaughan thinks it'a bad idea, so that might win me round.

The spinner thing is absolute garbage. We've had three good spinners since the war, and another will be along at some point. It's no CRISIS.

Mason Crane is getting big rep. I've not seen him yet but 18 is probably 15 years away from a spinner's peak, so...

[niko_cee]

Yeah, I didn't get why it would improve spin, and it's probably a waste of time at county level, but in international cricket it might have a beneficial effect on pitch preparation (if the home side knew they were going to be on the end of it if they produced a stinker). A future without the spectre of scoreboard pressure on a flat pitch.

:drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can't see it ever happening in internationals, as it would mean India and Australia never batting first at home again. I've never seen conditions in either of those where you'd want to bowl, save Hobart and the odd random green one when the subcontinent teams tour (but remember Australia never doctor pitches).

[niko_cee]

Oh, absolutely.

They'd just have to back themselves to execute their skills in the middle innings.

[Davgooner]

Meanwhile India posted the highest total of their series today: 215.

[Jimmy Floyd]

South Africa with a sterling start to their reply too. I'm starting to get some misplaced confidence about our tour there.

[Max Power]

Some outrageously poor cricket in this India/SA series. Seek out Faf Du Plessis' dismissal if you can.

[Davgooner]

They were 12-5 at one point. :D

[Jimmy Floyd]

Imran Tahir's attempt at nightwatchman yesterday was tears in your eyes hilarious. Got off the mark with a full blooded sweep for four, seemed to be out stumped but wasn't given, and was then bowled missing a straight Jadeja delivery by about two yards, all in the space of 12 balls.

[Davgooner]

Shittest nightwatchman ever.

[Jimmy Floyd]

8 off 7 this time :D

What a tit.

[Davgooner]

That sounds like the greatest run-out of all time.

[Max Power]

Pakistan gave a 39 year old opener his international debut. Classic Pakistan :D

Good to see Billings come to the party, great talent.

[Ian]

There's a Scottish-Pakistani guy at work who just thinks Pakistan doing stuff like that (didn't they start an aged spinner for the first time recently as well?) is the best thing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pakistan gave a 39 year old opener his international debut. Classic Pakistan :D

Between that, Imran Tahir's nightwatchmanship, and the comedy run out to end all comedy run outs, it's been a superb 24 hours for Pakistan comedy.

http://94.23.103.63/GIFs/105199106013076174032018063052248245178196244030/LQ/063181205058030214031022139138120023155223049119.g if

[Max Power]

Both of them racing to the same end so the other one is out. Great scenes.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Time to whip out one of Youtube's greatest videos.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQh70VV-RaY

[Danny]

Tea and Dinner being the sessions in this day night test :D

[ItalAussie]

Time to whip out one of Youtube's greatest videos.

The gift that keeps on giving.

[niko_cee]

Going well for New Zealand again by the looks of things.

[Blitz]

He just doesn't care :D

What are your opinions on the day/night test? I quite like it, and would love to watch one one day.

[John Arne]

I don't get why they are using a pink ball.... why not just use white? Pink isn't actually that easy to see when there is a crowd background, especially, when it's moving fast.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I had a cricket ball manufacturer bore me shitless about different coloured balls on Tuesday night so I can explain all. The red ball is the only colour of ball that retains its shine over a long form innings because it's the only dye which is light enough to see, but dark enough to allow use of the lachre which makes it stay shiny and hard for longer.

The pink ball can probably get closer than the white ball to the above, but still nowhere near the red. I've used orange balls before which are similar to the pink.

Basically, day/night Tests won't work unless you are willing to use a shit ball.

[elth]

I don't get why they are using a pink ball.... why not just use white? Pink isn't actually that easy to see when there is a crowd background, especially, when it's moving fast.

Because 1) they wear white and 2) the white ball might as well be entirely cork after about 40 overs.

They can't get a white ball to last 50 overs, let alone 80. Heck, they switched to 25 overs a ball in ODI cricket and they're still shithouse by over 40.

[elth]

Basically, day/night Tests won't work unless you are willing to use a shit ball.

There's not been anything shit about the ball so far in this game to be fair. It's actually lasting better than the red Kookaburra, although that's probably just because there's actually some grass on the pitch this game.

It's certainly great for visibility on TV. Very easy to spot. So far seems to move as much as the Duke when it's new and the conditions are favourable, but it doesn't have the late innings legs that the Duke does - once the lacquer goes and you start knocking off the paint, you need to be able to seam or spin it. No problem there as long as the seam lasts, which it seems to be so far.

[ItalAussie]

I didn't think I'd be in favour, but I've come around to the idea of day/night tests. I got home from work and had a chance to watch some test cricket. That alone basically won me over.

Also, the Australian physio did some substitute fielding in the afternoon. That's a thing that happened.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think we need to be very resistant to doing it in England, a) because we don't need to, b) because it's cold as fuck and c) because Michael Vaughan loves it.

Well up for them trying it elsewhere although the old pink ball on shit pitches like the Caribbean could lead to some truly dreadful cricket.

[Blitz]

I'd love to see it happen over here. The vibe in the evening would be pretty epic.

Would also work well climate wise.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Woakes to Afridi at the death :cool:

[Danny]

Great big choke from Woakes.

Edit: thank god he did his usual.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I love Woakes but come on mates, there must be 200 better death bowlers in England, many of whom aren't even professionals.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Darren Lehmann's son currently 184* for South Australia.

The Big Bash must be coming around soon. Groan. I mean, it's great fun, but too many lurid green snapbacks at 7am can make a man ill.

[Danny]

It is. The positive spin on not picking Rashid for SA is hes going to the Big Bash.

[elth]

The pink ball is probably going to get the blame for this test being over in three days, but the braindead batting has been the actual culprit.

Captain charging the spinner 5 down for less than 100 :moop:

[niko_cee]

Getting spannered by New Zealand ought to put pay to this as a format. Come on Kiwi!

[niko_cee]

That's an absolutely abysmal shot by Latham. Lyth-esque.

[hfswjyr]

Might as well skip 4 day tests and go straight for the 3 day format.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's that testosterone I was on about.

[niko_cee]

Just seen that Lyon DRS 'controversy'.

:D

Did they not have real time snicko or whatever it is called? Aw mate, that hotspot could have come from anywhere . . .

Probably fairly pivotal in the match.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've been too busy seething at India bringing up 'greentops' that they have to bat on worldwide as justification for the series of minefields they have wheeled out to welcome the admittedly inept South Africans.

That Ravi Shastri is now apparently in charge of all things India just makes it worse. The bad news for us is that we're going there next winter, and this time we don't have Swann and Panesar. Getting whitewashed by Shastri and his tracer bullets might be the end of times.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Oh, it was bloody Nigel Llong being a twat. No surprise. Everyone in county cricket absolutely hates him.

[ItalAussie]

The Guardian had a change of heart over the course of the afternoon:


NOT OUT! Lyon survives

That was Lyon’s third sweep in almost as many balls and he definitely didn’t hit it but geez, calm down Lyono. Where’s the fire? Also, any danger that decision could have taken a little less time than the Godfather trilogy? Absurd.
... Fast forward to the end of play ...


There will be plenty of focus on Nigel Llong’s inexplicable decision to reprieve Nathan Lyon.

Wankers. :D

[elth]

Just seen that Lyon DRS 'controversy'.

:D

Did they not have real time snicko or whatever it is called? Aw mate, that hotspot could have come from anywhere . . .

Probably fairly pivotal in the match.

They did, but it didn't show anything, which was the whole point.

Didn't we have an issue in the Ashes of a pretty clear wrong decision not being overturned because two technologies couldn't agree, so there wasn't incontrovertible evidence that the decision was wrong? I remember talking about something like that.

The funniest part was probably the ball tracking review that they checked obviously being from the ball before, but nobody noticing. Played, umpire.

[niko_cee]

Yeah, was Root out LBW having looked like he hit it? I can't quite recall.

I've only seen the Lyon one once, so don't know if it's right or not. I just thought the 3rd umpires reaction, although I may have been paraphrasing, was quite funny.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Boult nicking off Voges has just made this slightly more interesting.

[elth]

Finish. Kinda surprised Starc didn't just look at Siddle and go "you fucking what, mate?" when he called for the second run there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why did they send Starc in? For bantz?

The Channel 9 crew was in constant orgasm for the last 90 minutes or so.

[elth]

Why did they send Starc in? For bantz?

I think they rated him as a much, much better chance of not getting out than the other two.

[niko_cee]

The only thing that Pakistani super over was missing was a run out. In the era of hyper-professionalism their commitment to shambolic amateurism really is a breath of fresh air. Even borking the (simple) chance to run Buttler out right at the end.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was so fucking Pakistan. Needed 9 off 5, stupidly let the tailender on strike, he hits a six, 3 off 4, then 2 off 2 with the senior set batsman 75* on strike, then he completely bottles it and then in the super over they got bat to ball what, once?

[Jimmy Floyd]

An absolutely tremendous Cricinfo piece on Surrey's season here, which obviously is of greater interest to me but there are some brilliant anecdotes in it about various players including Sangakkara, Pietersen and Dernbach. Jade actually I'm getting the first good vibes out of for his whole career in the last six months, should we take him to the World T20?

http://www.thecricketmonthly.com/story/938759/to-hell-and-back


As ever with Sangakkara, there is the quantifiable - seven hundreds (five Championship, two List A) contributing to a luscious lorryload of runs. And then there is the intangible: the acts of goodwill that warrant filing next to Chuck Norris' ability to kill two stones with one bird. Only, with Sangakkara, a fair few of these are true.

Like, when out for dinner with his team-mates, Sangakkara would make an excuse to go to the bathroom or take a call and return having settled the bill. Or that on the eve of the Royal London Cup final, sensing that the bowlers needed rest, he ran in and bowled seam-up till each remaining batsman was satisfied.

[Davgooner]

http://i.imgur.com/JHhV7UZ.jpg

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's bloody brilliant. Peak South Africa. They must have put AB on ketamine before he went out there.

[Max Power]

Partnership between two of the best players in all formats of the modern era is ticking along at 0.78 rpo. Great stuff.

De Villiers has form for this though? Didn't he absolutely crawl to 30 off like 20,000 balls against Australia. Got to love a sport (and a man) where someone can play like that when the situation dictates and also reel off a 33 ball century

[hfswjyr]

I guess they knew the middle/tail didn't have it in them to last out.

[ItalAussie]

I really hoped South Africa could hold out all day.

So, the Indian pitches. Taking the piss? Or reasonable leverage of home ground advantage?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Andy Zaltzman did a piece in which he showed that they were statistically the worst for batting ever produced for a series in India by an absolute mile, i.e. a total outlier (and Ravi Shastri defending them is kind of a giveaway) but South Africa didn't exactly help themselves.

[Max Power]

It can't be helping India though can it? Yeah they beat everyone at home (except England in 2012 of course) but they are a total embrassment away from home. Maybe the worst touring side in the world and that has to improve for a nation of their size and resource.

I'm not saying greentops at Eden Gardens or anything. Just maybe some middle ground might help them adapt better on the road.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The 2012 England tour was proper comedy capers from the outset, perhaps my favourite away England tour ever. I think there's something with Indians in not only talking in clumsy clichés but also viewing the sport entirely through them, when in fact it's a subtle game that is won and lost on little moments. So we came over with a reputation of not being able to play spin, and as I recall they then fielded some sort of warm-up side with no spinners in it (http://www.espncricinfo.com/india-v-england-2012/engine/match/565801.html), which is a bit like inviting someone to a party at your house and then offering them a glass of your own urine.

They won the first Test in Ahmedabad (http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/current/match/565806.html), and then convinced themselves it was because England couldn't play spin, rather than the fact that we inexplicably picked Bresnan on a flat dead one and then flogged ourselves in the field for two days. Dhoni then ordered a raging turner for the second Test at Mumbai, with hilarious consequences (http://www.espncricinfo.com/india-v-england-2012/engine/match/565807.html) as their batting lineup was duly spun out twice by our far superior pair, and Pietersen scored that ridiculous ton. On to Calcutta and by now they were so obsessed with pitches that didn't they end up sacking the local groundsmen or something when he refused their demands to create another rank turner? Anyway, we won that too (http://www.espncricinfo.com/india-v-england-2012/engine/match/565808.html) and they were so cooked pitch-wise that for the fourth Test, needing a win, Nagpur rolled out the flattest, deadest pitch in Test history, and I think that was actually Joe Root's debut as well.

I can't really understand that mindset. Just find whatever pitch is there and play good cricket on it. The fact that they convince themselves that England, Australia and South Africa roll out green seamers for them whenever they tour is hilarious as well. No, chaps, you're just shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://stats.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/stats/index.html?class=1;home_or_away=2;orderby=win_loss _ratio;template=results;type=team

I mean, just look at that. They've been mugged by Sri Lanka already.

[Mr. Malik]

Sri Lanka had Murali taking 16 wicket hauls at The Oval, India have never had anybody like that in their attack. Winning away just comes down to taking wickets, something India have rarely been consistently good at.

With Murali long gone I expect to see India overtake Sri Lanka in the near future.

[Max Power]

Sri Lanka beat England a couple of years ago with Eranga and Dhamika Prasad running riot. They are a more resourceful team than India.

May well struggle without Sanga and Mahela now though of course

[Jimmy Floyd]

NZ v SL about to start on Sky Sports 3 if anyone fancies a glorious scene from Dunedin. It's like a drug to me. It's dark, cold and wet outside, bring on the blue southern sky.

Sri Lanka won the toss and are bowling with a crack attack of Dushmantha Chameera, Suranga Lakmal, Nuwan Pradeep and of course Rangana 'Rangy' Herath.

[Jimmy Floyd]

World T20 draw is finally done. It's fabulously shit. I'm 100% certain the draw is rigged.

Group A
England
Sri Lanka
South Africa
West Indies
Qualifier B

Group B
India
Pakistan
Australia
New Zealand
Qualifier A

Qualifier A
Bangladesh
Ireland
Netherlands
Oman

Qualifier B
Zimbabwe
Scotland
Afghanistan
Hong Kong

Despite this moronic format, the ICC claims today that the tournament 'globalises the sport'.

[hfswjyr]

I read that from the top and thought, shit Group A is stacked, until I got to Group B and realised there were only two groups. What kind of disgraceful format is that?

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's the same one they used last time and as far as I can see its main purpose is to keep associates out. I mean it's T20, would 4x4 and a quarter-final etc really hurt?

This is the seventh consecutive ICC tournament in which India and Pakistan have been drawn into the same group. Absolutely no chance it isn't rigged.

[niko_cee]

Neil Wagner has just nutmegged Angelo Mathews. Not sure I've ever seen something like that before.

[Ian]

How did he do that?

[niko_cee]

He bowled the ball straight, and it went through Mathews' legs (after some injudicious footwork), and bowled him. Just looked really bizarre. I think he must have thought, well, if I miss this, it's pitching outside leg so I can't be out LBW . . .

[Ian]

Hah. :D

I love the weird ones like that.

[niko_cee]

It's being termed a 'miracle ball' apparently.

Meanwhile I hadn't noticed that the Windies have had all their pie-chuckers banned.

[Jimmy Floyd]

West Indies are absolutely septic and I can't see any way back.

I always look around for young/teenage players in underage and domestic cricket and currently there is a lot coming through in England, a lot in Australia, a lot in Pakistan (although half of them will never be picked). India is slightly bare by their standards but there are a few (remember Ishan Kishan). South Africa has one or two as does New Zealand. The 'desh are going to come on strong I think although Sri Lanka are struggling a touch.

But West Indies have absolutely fuck all in the tank. Afghanistan would probably overtake them given the chance.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Monster runs for Taylor and Stokes in the first nonsense 100-a-side warm-up against the Durban Disabled XI. Two single figure efforts for Hales, but a fifty for Compton.

I would guess they're planning on this:

Cook
Hales
Compdog
Root
Taylor
Stokes
Bairstow
Moeen
Woakes
Broad
Anderson

Just look at that batting depth. It's like a Craze side.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Right, India, THIS, in the NZ v SL match, is a greentop.

Brilliantly Sri Lanka have responded by taking everything on like it's going out of fashion and Chandimal is 41* off 39 at time of going to press, just wafting the bat at everything even though it's hooping a yard.

[Danny]

I saw the wicket early on their inning mad how green it was :D

[Mr. Malik]

If NZ make a pitch like that for Australia :drool:

[Ian]

Sri Lanka going from 71-0 to 133 all out. :face:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Concluding session (surely) of a very good Test is underway on SS3. Kane 'fap fap fap' Williamson is 82 not out. New Zealand are 5 down and need 43 to win.

This bloke Chameera has come from absolutely nowhere to take (so far) 9 for 96 in the match, almost all of it with short balls.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Williamson to his 13th Test hundred, batting with his willy out. He might be the best player in the world, you know.

[Davgooner]

Sorry?

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's just a saying.

[hfswjyr]

Didn't realise he was averaging 90 this year.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Cook's hundred today was his 51st in first class cricket. Wonder if he has an outside shot at 100 if he gives the one day shit up. Not 31 until Friday. The highest number by an active player is 73 by Rogers, who he should piss past.

Root also tonning like the don he is.

[hfswjyr]

Sri Lanka were 27-5 at one stage. Might still make over 100.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://cricketpredictionlive.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Chris-Woakes-Profile-Cricinfo-Biography-Family-Pics-Video-News-Today.jpg

If he were a Gladiator, what would his stage name be? I reckon Sparrow.

That said, if my daughter brought him home I'd shed the sweetest tears of joy.

[Max Power]

Rockstar Woakes unfortunately doesnt get an early bowl as Amla wins the toss. How many is Hales going to get on a cloudy morning with Dale Steyn back in the team? I'm going with 8.

[Ian]

Right then, Joe, might be down to you to stop this getting too ugly.

[Max Power]

Hales actually looking pretty good early doors. Steyn right back on it though. Ominous.

[Ian]

They've given Hales a few balls to work with and he's off to a solid start. It'll be if they don't look too threatening but aren't giving him a sniff I'll worry.

[Luke Emia]

It had completely escaped my mind that the mighty Ronald wasn't there. A sad day for everyone.

[John Arne]

Er.. why have they gone off for thunder?

[Max Power]

It's raining.

[John Arne]

Not according to The Guardian.

Regardless, the covers are off.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can see us getting a fighting 214 all out off quite a lot of overs.

[John Arne]

97 all out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was such a shit waft.

[Max Power]

Collapse incoming but I do like the look of this batting lineup in theory. Compton a solid citizen at 3, Root and then Taylor before the counter attacking 6,7,8

[Jimmy Floyd]

It bats all the way down, just needs a couple of them to stand up as major players. I'm backing Taylor and Stokes. And Moeen, always Moeen.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Taylor whipping out the Ponting pull shot to the first short ball from Steyn which he's too short to have a chance against. Hope that's a sign of things to come.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Re the South African selection during the series, by the way, remember italicised players can only be replaced by other italicised players, and bold players by bold:

Elgar
van Zyl
Amla
de Villiers
du Plessis
Duminy
Bavuma
Abbott
Morkel
Piedt
Steyn

Harmer
Roussouw
Rabada
Imran Tahir
etc
etc

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sorry to say that Amla looked like a hapless tail ender in that innings.

[Byron]

Reading the BBC comments you'd think Compton had murdered the Queen. I think even Swann was complaining about him being a bit safe, when the exact fucking thing we needed was someone who could just stay in and stabilise a deteriorating innings.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think 303 is well above par on this tacky wicket and nobody will EVER score at four an over on it. Absolutely no idea what all the negativity is about. Compton and Taylor's partnership yesterday was superb.

I also think South Africa are actually quite a weak side.

[Davgooner]

Steyn's celebrations. :face:

Knighthood for anyone who just lamps him.

[Mr. Malik]

Yasir Shah's been popped for doping. What a fucking blow. I always liked to pretend cricket was relatively immune from it, but evidently that's not the case.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Absolutely ridiculous piece of umpiring. Clearly out and not even a slight debating point to be had.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Looks like it could cost us the Test match at this rate too.


Graeme Smith
Ex-South Africa captain on BBC Test Match Special

"When I was involved with South Africa, we developed a crop of players who were part of a very successful unit: Amla, De Villiers, Du Plessis, Duminy, Morkel, Steyn. But some of the players who have come in, and some of the tactical decisions that have been made, have been found wanting."

That's it Graam, your absence as wonderful cricketer and wonderful man is definitely what's lacking.

[Max Power]

Wasn't he floating the idea of a comeback lol

Broad bowling beautifully

[Max Power]

Grim knock from "Faf". In a really good position now