The little things in life that fuck you off

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I feel like Jackbox has kinda murdered the Cards Against Humanity crowd. I'd rather write some vicious robot battle raps than play some madlibs.

I'm not a fan of the robot rapping game. Mainly because I'm shit at rhyming.

I'm OUTRAGED that they didn't put a new Fibbage in.

[Pepe]

It's decent, but it's also meant for people half your age so i'm not sure how you got around to playing a game

Someone over a decade older than me suggested it and no one had the balls to say no.

[Kikó]

Jackbox is cool.

[phonics]

I know what you all think of my fashion choices but I'm currently reading an article telling me the new 'in' thing seems to be dressing like you're at a 80s themed halloween party?

https://i.imgur.com/yBwhGYn.jpg

The blokes outfit comes in at 500 quid not including the terrible shoes.

[Boydy]

Can't see his shoes.

[Boydy]

Oh great, my boiler's stopped working.

[Giggles]

Oh great, my boiler's stopped working.

Gas or oil?

[niko_cee]

Check the pressure.

[igor_balis]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=METbQ6mnWzI

there you go Boydy, mate

[Shindig]

When the left side of your headphones go. These have had a good run but all day the volume's felt off. Now I know why.

[Boydy]

Gas or oil?
Oil.

I don't think there is pressure on an oil one, niko_cee, that's a gas thing, isn't it?

[Giggles]

Oil.

I don't think there is pressure on an oil one, niko_cee, that's a gas thing, isn't it?

Some do. You'll see a water fill valve on it if it has.

Usual thing would be bleeding it in case air has got into the system. Even if it hasn't then you'd at least know if the pump is fucked or not.

[niko_cee]

My oil boiler has a pressure thing which you have to toggle two valves to adjust/get back to 1. It's always losing pressure as well so there's probably something fatally flawed with it (has been the case since some div came to service it last year and left one of those valves open).

Have you run out of oil?

[Lewis]

How does oil compare to gas cost-wise?

[Giggles]

How does oil compare to gas cost-wise?

I find it more expensive but in a lot of areas you've no choice.

[Boydy]

My oil boiler has a pressure thing which you have to toggle two valves to adjust/get back to 1. It's always losing pressure as well so there's probably something fatally flawed with it (has been the case since some div came to service it last year and left one of those valves open).

Have you run out of oil?

Nah, haven't run out of oil. Checked that already.

I'm not doing any bleeding shit or anything like that. I texted the landlord when I realised around seven (fucker still hasn't replied). He can sort it, it's what I pay rent for.

[niko_cee]

Oil is cheaper than gas here, I think, although that's probably because it's a bit less of a monopoly.

Both are probably off the charts in cost terms versus the UK.

[Baz]

My oil boiler has a pressure thing which you have to toggle two valves to adjust/get back to 1. It's always losing pressure as well so there's probably something fatally flawed with it (has been the case since some div came to service it last year and left one of those valves open).

Have you run out of oil?
Yeah ours needs “refilling” (that’s what I call it, no idea what the valve actually does) every month or so. Pain in the bum cos it’s in the loft.

[igor_balis]

My ability to put my foot in it strikes again.

My pal posted a photo of Mickey Rourke and Axl Rose looking rough in the group chat saying "mum's big night out", and I just assumed it was a photo of his mum with some celebrity I didn't recognise and said "who's she with", to much mirth from the lads who've met his mum. Oops.

[Mazuuurk]

Own up to it instead ya wuss.

[Giggles]

Got some oranges yesterday to eat in the morning to try avoid having to take the silver bullet to take a shit again. When did the bastards get so hard to peel? The skin must have came off in around 40 little pieces and there was still a horrible inner skin left on the bit you eat. Ended up fucking it across the hedge in the car park.

[niko_cee]

:D

Bet it as sold as an easy peeler as well.

Unless you're talking about a full size orange, which have never been easy to peel.

[Giggles]

Yeah it was a big one. Are the small ones easier?

[niko_cee]

Well, probably, although quite often they're little bastards too. Some are sold as easy peelers but whether they are or not is hit and miss.

Not sure I've ever encountered a big orange that wasn't both hard to peel and really pithy inside. Only suitable for quartering, half-time orange style.

[Giggles]

Never thought of cutting it up, though it'd be hard to spot pips then and even one of them means it would go across the hedge anyway.

[niko_cee]

https://d1ycl3zewbvuig.cloudfront.net/images/products/11/LN_603507_BP_11.jpg

[Giggles]

Going to grab these. They don't say seedless but I wouldn't trust that anyway. Every segment will be held up to the light.

https://www.tesco.ie/groceries/Product/Details/?id=266499399

[Baz]

Yeah oranges are bad.

Clementines, satsumas and tangerines are what you want.

[Queenslander]

What kind of third world country do you people live in? Oranges + thumb always works down under.

[Raoul Duke]

The true mark of a great is being able to peel it all off in one go, unbroken and make an orange cock and balls

[Jimmy Floyd]

Top tip with oranges, keep them in the fridge and then eat them half time style.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I prefer Chinese style.

[Giggles]

I'll be attempting again in the morning so I'll post some photos.

[Shindig]

People who wait at a pedestrian crossing but don't press the button to cross until another person arrives. Suspect behaviour.

[Spikey M]

I have literally never seen that.

[Giggles]

I've seen enough cunts press it and walk across anyway, leaving you sitting at a red with no cunt there.

[SvN]

If the road becomes empty, why would you wait to cross?

[Giggles]

If the road becomes empty, why would you wait to cross?

Because the little man is red. If there's nobody crossing then I should be allowed to drive on a red too.

[-james-]

Most of mainland Europe does that in my experience. Nearly been flattened as a pedestrian a fair few times.

[SvN]

Because the little man is red. If there's nobody crossing then I should be allowed to drive on a red too.

What difference does it make to you either way? You're still having to stop at the red light.

[Giggles]

Most of mainland Europe does that in my experience. Nearly been flattened as a pedestrian a fair few times.

Yeah I was nearly mown down myself in an eastern European country a while back. Though they dry and manouevre the car between pedestrians rather than wait til there's nobody walking.

[Giggles]

What difference does it make to you either way? You're still having to stop at the red light.

That's what I'm saying. If pedestrians can cross when the man is red using their judgement that there's no cars coming, then cars should be able to go when the light is red using theirs when there's no pedestrians crossing.

[SincereTheRebel]

When the green man tells you to go. You should wait until all cars stop before attempting to cross unless it is completely clear.

[SvN]

That's what I'm saying. If pedestrians can cross when the man is red using their judgement that there's no cars coming, then cars should be able to go when the light is red using theirs when there's no pedestrians crossing.

I suppose the difference is the consequences of making a mistake.

If the pedestrian gets it wrong, they get hit. If the driver gets it wrong, the pedestrian still gets hit.

[Kikó]

Not all of those crossing buttons actually do anything and they're set on timers based on the lights. It's just to give the illusion you're doing something.

[Spikey M]

The only ones that do are the ones on busy roads with traffic all going in one direction. If it's a crossroad then it's all automated.

[phonics]

Not all of those crossing buttons actually do anything and they're set on timers based on the lights. It's just to give the illusion you're doing something.

Same with elevators, think the 'close door' button is only active in something like 1 in 3.

[igor_balis]

Not really the right thread but I just accidentally leaned into the emergency stop button on the train and it stopped for like two minutes at rush hour until the driver came to reset it. Oops. In my really obvious work uniform. If it was any more than a couple of minutes I'd be expecting to be fired cus of a Twitter storm before I got off the train.

[mugbull]

Same with elevators, think the 'close door' button is only active in something like 1 in 3.

In the US, any elevator that complies with the Americans With Disabilities Act is required to have the close door button non-functional by default

[Shindig]

The only ones that do are the ones on busy roads with traffic all going in one direction. If it's a crossroad then it's all automated.

Yup. Although the one I was at yesterday doesn't dish out the green man unless the button's been pressed. So either that lad had the sequence down or he was prepared to wait all day until someone else came along and pressed it.

[bruhnaldo]

If the road becomes empty, why would you wait to cross?

I got a ticket in Montreal for this.

International crime :drool:

[Spikey M]

The true mark of a great is being able to peel it all off in one go, unbroken and make an orange cock and balls

https://i.ibb.co/FbDFNr0/20190115-093628.jpg

[Disco]

Even Spikeys orange peel dick is embarrassingly narrow.

[bruhnaldo]

You guys don't just give it a little nibble to get the skin started peeling?

Source: I'm from Florida.

[Spikey M]

You can give my orange skinny cock a nibble anytime, sweetheart.

[bruhnaldo]

Don't you tempt me with a good time you fuckin tease.

[niko_cee]

I do, but only because I have virtually no nails.

Excellent effort on getting the jap's eye on the peeling.

I'm not sure I've ever used, or considered the racist connotations of, that colloquialism before.

[Baz]

It’s not discrimination if everyone does it.

[Spikey M]

Do you reckon they call it an Eskimo/Stewart Lee eye in Japan?

[Giggles]

Like, for fuck sake. Easy peel my bollix.


http://i66.tinypic.com/149o6zc.png

[Queenslander]

Start near the stem surely?

[wullie]

With proper easy peelers you can dig in anywhere and it comes clean off, you've been had there.

[Giggles]

Start near the stem surely?

The pith should still come off though.

[Queenslander]

We dont have fancy oranges.

[Baz]

You need to give it a good roll around in your hands first to loosen the skin, when it's tight like that.

Out of context this post is bad.

[bruhnaldo]

Giggles having a decently started peel going to stop mid-sesh for a quick pic is absolutely APPALLING to my good Floridian nature.

[Giggles]

Giggles having a decently started peel going to stop mid-sesh for a quick pic is absolutely APPALLING to my good Floridian nature.

A decently started peel? That bit came off in about six different pieces.

[bruhnaldo]

You telling me you can't dig a nail in under what you're showing and finish that off?

The state of this.

[Giggles]

You telling me you can't dig a nail in under what you're showing and finish that off?

The state of this.

That white shit between the skin and the orange should be coming too and it wasn't. It also says "Easy Peeler" on the pack, so fuck that. Bin.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Giggles clearly has problems.

[bruhnaldo]

He's wasted an orange cause he's afraid of the white bits holy shit i'm incensed.

"The pith of the orange — the white part between the skin and fruit — can be sour or bitter but actually contains just as much vitamin C as the fruit itself, with a good deal of fiber," said someone on google.

[Giggles]

He's wasted an orange cause he's afraid of the white bits holy shit i'm incensed.

"The pith of the orange — the white part between the skin and fruit — can be sour or bitter but actually contains just as much vitamin C as the fruit itself, with a good deal of fiber," said someone on google.

That's grand, but it tastes fucking shite.

[Spikey M]

Bruh, you've been much improved lately, but don't start digging out Giggles. I will swarm on man.

[Giggles]

He could at least offer to send me some proper oranges.

[bruhnaldo]

Mans want to just toss delicious citrus into the garbage because it wasn't EASY PEEL™ enough but reckon I ought to rush to send him PROPER oranges.

[Giggles]

Mans want to just toss delicious citrus into the garbage because it wasn't EASY PEEL™ enough but reckon I ought to rush to send him PROPER oranges.

Ones where the horrible white crap comes off with the skin. Sound.

[Boydy]

Mobile sites that pester you about downloading their app. Reddit is hell for it. I don't want your fucking app, leave me alone.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Reddit really needs a 'remember' option for that, it's seriously annoying.

[bruhnaldo]

Am I the only one who'll watch a video on facebook and then when the mid-vid ad starts just move on to the next post?

[Spikey M]

Yes. Nobody else does that.

[bruhnaldo]

Be nice.

[Spikey M]

I have a cold, so fuck you. Fuck me. Fuck sake. I'd fucking stab Giggles for one of his shitty oranges right now. Pith me up.

[Disco]

Avin a pith?

[Spikey M]

Pith my face.

[Queenslander]

Pith in my mouth...

[Baz]

That's right, abuse me, kick me, pith me, stab me, axe me
Knife me, fork me, fuck me, suck me, beat me, pith me
Blow me, eat me, stab me, abuse my pith, abuse my body

[Queenslander]

That's right, abuse me, kick me, pith me, stab me, axe me
Knife me, fork me, fuck me, suck me, beat me, pith me
Blow me, eat me, stab me, abuse my pith, abuse my body

You are a bloke I want to have a beer with!

[Spikey M]

Blue Moon. Slice of Orange. Lots of pith.

[Ian]

Swirl and slam dunk.

[Queenslander]

Blue Moon. Slice of Orange. Lots of pith.

X

[Baz]

You are a bloke I want to have a beer with!:confused:

[Disco]

People who phone you up to tell you they've sent you an email. Thanks a lot, how would I ever have noticed otherwise.

[bruhnaldo]

Good to see the international sign of "answer my fucking e-mail, dickhead" is indeed international. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

People who phone you up to tell you they've sent you an email. Thanks a lot, how would I ever have noticed otherwise.

One of my French customers takes this a step further and faxes me to tell me he's sent an email.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fax machines are still used?

[bruhnaldo]

I use our fax machine literally every day unfortunately.

(I do some work in medical billing).

[Lewis]

Yeah, they are good for sending private stuff quickly. Apparently the Army loves them.

[Disco]

You can easily set up a fax-email doodad as well so you can receive faxes without needing a machine from the 1950's sat on a desk somewhere.

[bruhnaldo]

I had no idea you could fax things to e-mail addresses until yesterday and boy am I excited about that.

[Baz]

There are two urinals in the toilets at work and one of them notoriously filled up if you had a big wee, and took ages to drain. The other one was better, and if you had a big enough wee it would just about flow back up over the grate and you felt a great sense of achievement. This achievement was easily done on the first one, but an actual accomplishment if you managed it on the latter.

Went in the other day and there was a sign on the broken one: DO NOT USE! HAS BEEN REPORTED. I Snapchatted this to Mike who instructed me to wee on the sign. I did not.

Went in this morning and the sign has gone. Has it been repaired? I tested it. It’s been repaired. I had a massive wee, and not only did it not fill up like it used to, but I couldn’t even get back above the grate. Someone had really gone to town fixing it.

Just been for another wee now – another really long one too – and decided to use the old faithful urinal. To my absolutely dismay, I couldn’t get my wee back above the grate. Clearly repairing the drainage of the other one had cleared this one too. No accomplishment, no feat, no sense of achievement.

I’m devastated.

[Kikó]

What the fuck.

[Ian]

We were told that another faxes are still used is that if you fax a legal document what comes out the other side is still a legal document.

[phonics]

Yeah, they are good for sending private stuff quickly. Apparently the Army loves them.


Fax machines are still used?

It's because faxes are considered the most secure form of digital technology. There's a quite interesting piece in The Atlantic about it here: https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2018/11/why-people-still-use-fax-machines/576070/

[Giggles]

There are two urinals in the toilets at work and one of them notoriously filled up if you had a big wee, and took ages to drain. The other one was better, and if you had a big enough wee it would just about flow back up over the grate and you felt a great sense of achievement. This achievement was easily done on the first one, but an actual accomplishment if you managed it on the latter.

Went in the other day and there was a sign on the broken one: DO NOT USE! HAS BEEN REPORTED. I Snapchatted this to Mike who instructed me to wee on the sign. I did not.

Went in this morning and the sign has gone. Has it been repaired? I tested it. It’s been repaired. I had a massive wee, and not only did it not fill up like it used to, but I couldn’t even get back above the grate. Someone had really gone to town fixing it.

Just been for another wee now – another really long one too – and decided to use the old faithful urinal. To my absolutely dismay, I couldn’t get my wee back above the grate. Clearly repairing the drainage of the other one had cleared this one too. No accomplishment, no feat, no sense of achievement.

I’m devastated.

And I thought I was pulling the piss with the oranges.

[Spikey M]

*Pith.

[Foe]

I still think the person who decided to print a "target" sign on the inside of a toilet is a genius.

Turning having a piss into a game is what makes work worthwhile. Also lunch. Lunch is good.

[bruhnaldo]

That this guy wrote an essay about him being excited to drink a lot of fluids.

[bruhnaldo]

holy shit when people come up to your area and just stand there and wait for you to acknowledge them instead of saying "excuse me" or "pardon me" or literally anything

they just walk up and stare.

small caveat: i'm working in a cubicle that looks out into a waiting room so there's reason for people to just be standing there and not an obvious cue for me to do something

[bruhnaldo]

Idk where else to put this but

Nurse asks patient who has nose pain: "I'm not trying to be mean but do you pick your nose?"

She says "No."

Wait a minute... do people not pick their nose for real? Doesn't everybody ?

Is it literally only me?!

[Spikey M]

Do you eat it Bruh?

[mugbull]

Why not? No worse than anchovies.

[bruhnaldo]

Listen if I'm the only one who enjoys the sensation of removing one of them big ol' boogers out that's fine I'll be the freak show of the group.

[bruhnaldo]

Obviously not in public btw

[Giggles]

That's half the fun, especially when you've one of those hipster 'people watching' cunts eyeballing you.

[Spikey M]

Listen if I'm the only one who enjoys the sensation of removing one of them big ol' boogers out that's fine I'll be the freak show of the group.

Do. You. Eat. It?

Do you prefer crusty ones or slimy ones?

[Lewis]

Eating bogies to own the hipsters.

[Giggles]

I snorted one up the other morning that was like a big lump of dried silicone. Weird fucking thing, a good 10mm across.

[bruhnaldo]

Do. You. Eat. It?

Do you prefer crusty ones or slimy ones?

No way you spaz I have SOME self-respect.

As far as the picking the crusty ones are by far the best. I don't really like the slimy ones if i'm fair.

[Baz]

Why not just blow your nose? Fair enough scrape out any stragglers but I wouldn’t call that picking your nose.

[Yevrah]

In other examples of 'things we finished a long time ago, but people won't leave alone', traffic lights.

What was wrong with a circular completely visible light and how is that improved by sticking it behind a grate?

[phonics]

In other examples of 'things we finished a long time ago, but people won't leave alone', traffic lights.

What was wrong with a circular completely visible light and how is that improved by sticking it behind a grate?

The grates are for when there's multiple lights in one set, the grates are directed towards the lane said light influences. Also prevents sunlight from dulling them.

[Baz]

Bought a so-called silent mouse. The button click is noticeably quieter than any mouse I've ever used before, albeit definitely not silent.

The scroll wheel, however, makes a right bloody racket.

[Spikey M]

Baz embracing the true intent of this thread. :cool:

[bruhnaldo]

i've been watching rugby for the past 20 minutes and still can't work out the rules to save my life

[Giggles]

i've been watching rugby for the past 20 minutes and still can't work out the rules to save my life

I wouldn't worry about it, it's shit.

[Spikey M]

i've been watching rugby for the past 20 minutes and still can't work out the rules to save my life

In very basic terms, you can only pass the ball sideways or behind you (unless you kick it).

Punching is ok, but being rude isn't.

All referees have to be Welsh by law.

[bruhnaldo]

See the sideways/backwards/or kick thing I caught but it's all the other bits like.... one they do the "scrum" it just seems as if one guy just rolls the ball under his teammates.

Then the bit where they throw it in and then launch one of their own guys up in the air to catch it... that shit seems entirely pointless to say the least.

I'm not asking for clarification for whatever it's worth it just fucks me off that I can't pick up on the intricacies in a lifetime of the random watching of 20 minutes intervals.

[Disco]

Nobody really understands the rules.

Scrums are very silly these days so the blatant feeding of the ball to your own side is ignored in favour of getting the damn thing done without it falling to bits. So the shoving is a contest but the actual putting in of the ball is not. Yes we know it doesn't make sense but there are idiots making the rules.

Line outs are fine though.

[Spikey M]

Disco has it right.

I was a fairly late comer to Rugby, I've probably been watching it - only internationals, and not the League shite - for about 10 years now. Yet, I still don't know what's going on half the time. You just have to leave the intricacies to one side and enjoy a load of men smashing each other in the heads. Plus, you get to pretend to be posh. Yah.

I've been to 2 games at Twickenham. There was a Royal at both. A fly over at one. AND a streaker got on the pitch, avoided all the security, and kissed Billy Twelvetrees. Posh.

Solihull posh.

[Lewis]

Meanwhile, in league... (https://twitter.com/CTRLFC/status/1091386367169490945)

[Vercetti]

You'd never see that tweet from a football club.

The likes of Joey Barton or Lee Cattermole would have set it on fire for a laugh.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Rugby is probably the sport where if you watch games from about 1990 it looks like a completely different sport to what's played now. Contested scrums, no lifting at lineouts, players who are under 17 stone able to compete at international level, and so on.

Everyone must be on roids, realistically.

[Kikó]

They're all doped up 100%.

[Spikey M]

Outside of non-sports like Darts and Snooker, I doubt there's a single Sportsman left that isn't a human pin cushion that rattles when they walk.

[bruhnaldo]

I was really confused when everyone went dead silent for the conversion attempt and the banners around the stadium read out "RESPECT THE KICKER" like I was watching golf.

Minutes later man had a 3 inch gash on his forehead in a scene reminiscent of Stone Cold v Bret Hart.

[Spikey M]

Bruh, we had someone copyright - or attempt to - the way they held their hands in the run up to kick a while back. It's serious business.

https://s.telegraph.co.uk/graphics/TimelineGenerator/bin/img/1426842813061/jonny-wilkinson_pa_2083491b.jpg

[bruhnaldo]

You know I was sorta getting that feeling about them being fairly serious cause one guy (may have been the same lad since it was England, mind) was doing this weirdo bounce thing before kicking it... like I know Cristiano does that big breath thing before freekicks so I don't reckon that's too far off but still I had a sensible chuckle at the whole debacle.

[igor_balis]

Overly officious moderation of facebook pages. A list of like 20 rules and being made to answer a few questions before being approved to join a page dedicated to funny bad wedding photos is unnecessary.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why is the new version of MS Paint (or Paint 3D as they call it) so unrelentingly shite? We're not all latte-sipping graphic designers (and as if they would use Paint anyway), for most of the world it's an in-out-bosh piece of functionality. It now takes me an hour to get screenshots through it.

[Boydy]

Use snip instead. Shift + Windows + s, I think.

[mo]

Snipping tool changed my life.

[Ian]

Snipping tool is the best, though I didn't know about that shortcut.

Mind blown.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pos rep for that isn't enough, so I've arranged for a thousand solid gold pianos to be dispatched to Ballymena.

[Baz]

Pos rep for that isn't enough, so I've arranged for a thousand solid gold pianos to be dispatched to Ballymena.Good to hear, else he might have knocked me out of the Top 10 (https://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/memberlist.php?order=desc&sort=reputation&pp=20).

[Ian]

At a glance I think I must be the only winner of my tournament group to not also have the most rep of the people in my group.

And Giggles is ahead of me by a mile on that front.

[Baz]

Probably because of all the negs you got for trying to defend your voice in the last WDYTOE.

[Danny]

Snipping tool was a life changer back in the day. I only recently learned about the shortcut Boydy posted. I had set one up manually to open shipping tool with ctrl alt S.

Still haven’t been able to retrain myself.

[Boydy]

https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/021/807/4d7.png

[Ian]

Probably because of all the negs you got for trying to defend your voice in the last WDYTOE.

Literally the only negative rep I have is from you.

[Baz]

:D

That's because only I use rep.

[bruhnaldo]

Holy shit what the fuck is this snip tool omg

[Ian]

:D

[phonics]

I live and die by the snipping tool. IMGUR making you upload a photo before being able to ctrl+v an upload means I've uploaded this gif from Tekken like 300 times.

https://i.imgur.com/jyddwo9.gif

[bruhnaldo]

That does seem easier than pasting into paint and making a new file every single time.

WOW I'm learning a lot today.

[igor_balis]

I use rep a lot.

[-james-]

Always felt that knowledge of Snipping Tool whilst others pissed about in mspaint was like being a god amongst men, but Boyd's ctrl + win + s trick has blown my puny mind.

[Boydy]

You're only allowed to use it if you voted for me against Mahow.

[Ian]

I'll take it into account for the 2020 Super Tournament.

[Baz]

I'll take it into account for the 2020 Super Tournament.

:cool:

[Vercetti]

Next year I'd like to see six or seven preliminary qualifying rounds before the group stage starts.

Each voting stage lasting a week.

[SincereTheRebel]

A head to head league would be good. Pass the torch too me and ill sort it out. It would be full of errors but still.

[niko_cee]

Straight knock-out no seeding!

[SincereTheRebel]

I agree, seeding is pussy.

[Vercetti]

Lewis vs Jimmy in the first round :drool:

[SincereTheRebel]

We do the league, we do cups as champions league and europa. The whole ting .

[Disco]

I want to hear what the terms are before I agree to join a breakaway league.

[SincereTheRebel]

Its already being settled. The next round are the heavy hitters. European elites.

[Spikey M]

A head to head league would be good. Pass the torch too me and ill sort it out. It would be full of errors but still.

How would you weight the games so that there is a home advantage?

[Shindig]

Do we need fourth officials?

[Mike]

I live and die by the snipping tool. IMGUR making you upload a photo before being able to ctrl+v an upload means I've uploaded this gif from Tekken like 300 times.

https://i.imgur.com/jyddwo9.gif

I use ShareX (https://getsharex.com/), it's the same but I have it set to auto upload to IMGUR.

[igor_balis]

i tend to just send photos as messages to myself on facebook then copy and paste the file link from there. sometimes upload it on my profile with privacy set to "just me" if i want it saved for posterity

[SincereTheRebel]

How would you weight the games so that there is a home advantage?

Away goals rule

[Offshore Toon]

Lewis vs Jimmy in the first round :drool:
Is this still the accepted 1st v 2nd? Since coming back for my most recent spell I wouldn't say there are particular posters that really stand out from the crowd. People seem to be voting based on historical reputation more than anything so its basically pre-determined. If we knew the routes to the final we'd be able to predict with Xavi-like accuracy.

[Vercetti]

I'm very much working from six/seven year old opinions.

I'd still chuck Davgooner into my top five, even though he probably gave Emmanuel Eboue HIV. It's no longer the death sentence it once was, I hear. Good news for MJ, it would seem.

[igor_balis]

Is this still the accepted 1st v 2nd? Since coming back for my most recent spell I wouldn't say there are particular posters that really stand out from the crowd. People seem to be voting based on historical reputation more than anything so its basically pre-determined. If we knew the routes to the final we'd be able to predict with Xavi-like accuracy.

hey man i'm doing alright and i've only been here a couple of years. showing my sisters you can smash through that glass ceiling x

i'd have lewis and jimmy as my #1 and #2 based on current form as well as anything historic.

[Baz]

Is this still the accepted 1st v 2nd? Since coming back for my most recent spell I wouldn't say there are particular posters that really stand out from the crowd. People seem to be voting based on historical reputation more than anything so its basically pre-determined. If we knew the routes to the final we'd be able to predict with Xavi-like accuracy.You shall see them on Friday when the brackets are released.

[Ian]

Straight knock-out no seeding!

Like in the more exciting Proper Football Man's Cup you mean? :cool:

[Giggles]

ShareX for the screenshots :cool:

[Vercetti]

People turning up mob-handed for appointments.

The particular bunch that irked me all had their Costa cups in hand, as they proceeded to make a fucking racket while sorting out their seating plan as they took up five chairs in a waiting room.

[Shindig]

The Fire and Ice Festival. For the amount of people it seems to bring into town, it's not even good.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Hi, do you have these shoes in size 11?
*Checks* No, sorry
How about these?
Nope
These ones?
No

He then brought out the only 2 pairs they had in size 11 and both were shit. Fuck Footlocker, they never have the shoes I want in my size.

[Lewis]

Isn't Footlocker for kids and minorities?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You can go in if you pretend to like basketball.

[Baz]

Going to a shoe shop in 2019. Haven’t you got the internet?

[phonics]

Going to a shoe shop in 2019. Haven’t you got the internet?

I largely refuse to shoe shop on the internet. You can get pretty much anything, even the rare stuff from a shop and the difference between photos and life is so big.

[Shindig]

Kinda agree. You need to try them on, break them in, etc.

[John]

How long do you spend walking around in the shop if you're breaking your shoes in before buying them?

[Shindig]

Not much. Just enough to feel if anything's digging in or uncomfortable.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Going to a shoe shop in 2019. Haven’t you got the internet?

I ordered a pair and they were narrow as fuck (I went to a petrol station for some stuff whilst wearing them and had to take off my left shoe to drive back as my toes went numb) and I'm going on holiday on Thursday.

Sent the ones back and went in store. I've ordered a pair that I wanted but it's highly doubtful I'll get them before I leave.

[phonics]

By the way Baz

50% of Jordans here: https://www.sepsport.com/product/16

[Disco]

Wear are the rest?

[Baz]

By the way Baz

50% of Jordans here: https://www.sepsport.com/product/16

Are they real or "reps"? Cos you can get reps cheaper than that on dhgate. (Not that I would.)

If they're real though...

https://www.sepsport.com/uploads/Nike_Air_Jordan_Shoes/Air_Jordan_XXX_30_Shoes/Air_Jordan_XXX/Nike_Air_Jordan_XXX_Black_Cat_Galaxy_Anthracite_Ba sketball_Shoes_811006_010_P4.jpg

There's too much choice for them to be real.

[Boydy]

The guy in my work who eats with his mouth open. And he eats an apple every fucking day. It's horrendous to listen to.

[Offshore Toon]

Why don't you say something?

[Danny]

Broken TV's

We have done some reorganizing in the house over the last few weeks leading to me finally having a proper desk space in the game room (game room because its where the pool table is and PS4 was until we got a better TV in the living room :lol: ). We decided we would go ahead and get a new TV for that room to hang on the wall. It came today, heavy thing, took me a while to get it into the house, legs on it and when I went for the big reveal the fucker is cracked.

Already sorted the replacement and shipping back but that was a right ball ache.

[bruhnaldo]

Fuck that one hurt my soul tbh. Sorry bro.

[Queenslander]

Murdoch media out in force today defending convicted pedo George Pell. The right in this country love protecting their pedo mates.

[bruhnaldo]

I'm not Catholic so I apologize if this offends anyone but I'd almost die to see the Vatican get raided and all of those secrets they keep come out to the light.

I'd likely be disappointed but FUCK I wanna know.

[Queenslander]

I'm not Catholic so I apologize if this offends anyone but I'd almost die to see the Vatican get raided and all of those secrets they keep come out to the light.

I'd likely be disappointed but FUCK I wanna know.

They run a world wide child fucking racket that overlaps with conservative, catholic politicans, celebrities and billionares who have done the best to protect them.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't understand why there are so many fiddlers in the Catholic ranks.

Do they turn to God because they like kids but know it's wrong and then realise it's free game? Do they know it's free game so join for easy access? Are other religions this rife (but then why don't we hear more)?

It almost seems like the normal ones are a minority.

[bruhnaldo]

They run a world wide child fucking racket that overlaps with conservative, catholic politicans, celebrities and billionares who have done the best to protect them.

Aye but surely they have a ton of other type of shit, too.

It can't be ALL child fucking. Shit actually it probably is.

[Queenslander]

The IPA have set up a fund to pay for his legal fees.

https://www.perthnow.com.au/news/wa/special-fund-set-up-to-pay-for-cardinal-george-pells-legal-fees-ng-febbed62ed2353028d55650bd9cc7232

IPA

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Institute_of_Public_Affairs

Edit: Rupert Murdoch is a notable IPA bloke.

[Queenslander]

Aye but surely they have a ton of other type of shit, too.

It can't be ALL child fucking. Shit actually it probably is.

Wealth and power as well, probably.

[Boydy]

Why don't you say something?

You can't just tell someone you don't know that well that they make disgusting noises when they eat.

[Lewis]

Wouldn't they want to know so that they can alter their ways?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mimic him for a while.

He'll either get really conscious about it or tell you to shut up and you can tell him about his habits.

[phonics]

Wouldn't they want to know so that they can alter their ways?

No-one is changing their ways past the age of 28.

[Spikey M]

I don't understand why there are so many fiddlers in the Catholic ranks.

Do they turn to God because they like kids but know it's wrong and then realise it's free game? Do they know it's free game so join for easy access? Are other religions this rife (but then why don't we hear more)?

It almost seems like the normal ones are a minority.

If you want to nonce kids, you become a Catholic. If you want to be violent, you convert to Islam.

That's not to say that the majority of either religion are that way, but they have become so linked to noncing and violence that those so inclined jump on board and make the issue worse.

[niko_cee]

It's not as if the Muslims aren't also partial to a bit of noncing, albeit of a different style.

[SincereTheRebel]

It wasnt the smartest idea to ask man to become celibate and put them around children all day. Fuck religion.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Noncing happens in any closed-off environment. Boarding schools, football academies, the Catholic church, you name it. Subject matter not important, you just need an available supply of kids and a position of trust or a lack of scrutiny.

[Queenslander]

Foster homes as well. That also happens a fair bit down here.

Sky News have gone on the front foot all day claiming some lefty conspiracy. John Howard put his name to some bullshit character thingy as some sort of good bloke gesture. Between this and the billions of dollars worth of kickbacks to donors and former MPs that has surfaced the Liberals are going to be in opposition for 10+ years...

[Giggles]

Foster homes as well. That also happens a fair bit down here.

Sky News have gone on the front foot all day claiming some lefty conspiracy. John Howard put his name to some bullshit character thingy as some sort of good bloke gesture. Between this and the billions of dollars worth of kickbacks to donors and former MPs that has surfaced the Liberals are going to be in opposition for 10+ years...

Tom and Pippa would never bugger anyone!



.

[Queenslander]

Tom and Pippa would never bugger anyone!



.

:D

[Offshore Toon]

You can't just tell someone you don't know that well that they make disgusting noises when they eat.
You definitely can. Would you tell somebody if they had a bogey hanging out their nose? It might be a bit awkward, but it's best for all involved to get this kind of thing out there.

[Shindig]

I hope he makes it worse by going, "Om, nom, nom, nom." like a true mouthbreather. Or he laughs heartily and spits it out.

[SincereTheRebel]

Im now getting these adds on Youtube. My search history must be suprising.



https://i.imgur.com/gvM26hp.jpg

[Disco]

Why yes elderly neighbours, I am aware that I'm my washing car in the rain and no, I do not need you to sidle up and deliver your carefully crafted little quip about 'never getting it dry in this'. It's called: This is the time I have free in which to do this so this is when it's happening.

[Giggles]

I hope they said "you can do mine next". It's always hilarious when people say that.

[Spikey M]

'Atleast you'll save money on your water bill'.

[igor_balis]

Working in a bank I must have this exchange at least once a week:

"hi, can i help?"
"YOU GOT ANY FREE SAMPLES ?? AHAH"

It doesn't annoy me though, there's something about those shit predictable jokes that's quite...I dunno, reassuring and comforting. Like a blanket.

[Danny]

You should print a bunch of fivers with your face on them and start giving them out as samples.

[Shindig]

Tell him you'll consult your manager, put them on hold for 30 minutes and then disconnect.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://youtu.be/Af86I5Er_Mc

Make them saucy, Igor.

[igor_balis]

All decent suggestions lads, but I think I'm pretty good at bringing the bantz professionally as it is.

FOUR TIMES I've managed to input the correct sort code and account number but an incorrect reference for a customer paying a bill! First three times it was a non existent reference so was easily retrieved from holding accounts from the respective companies with a smallish phone call, but the fourth time I managed to get the credit card number for somebody else entirely! How we laughed.

Management could barely contain their mirth after I had to spend most of two days on the phone to the random recipient of my error and the credit card company, and after they had to pay comp to both the original person who i failed to pay the bill for, and the person i accidentally paid.

[Giggles]

You should print a bunch of fivers with your face on them and start giving them out as samples.

Get that on a note.

https://i.imgur.com/0JVI0wo.jpg

[Giggles]

Snow is starting to burst across the country now and I've a fucking flight tomorrow :moop:

[bruhnaldo]

one of the facebook pages I follow is basically a Orlando based Man United supporters group. It's a decent trip on a Saturday morning to one of the pubs downtown to watch the game with fellow Utd folk blah blah blah.

Anyways, today someone posted a video of them walking into OT and it opening up to the pitch or what have you.... Shit I could only dream of at the moment.

Go down to the comments someone posts

"Ah fuck I love that they were playing Tears for Fears lad... GIGGS WILL TEAR YOU APART AGAIN!"

And I think wait... what? Grab the headphones and sure enough it's the Smiths.

Sigh.

[Shindig]

Go down to the comments someone posts

"Ah fuck I love that they were playing Tears for Fears lad... GIGGS WILL TEAR YOU APART AGAIN!"

And I think wait... what? Grab the headphones and sure enough it's the Smiths.

Sigh.

This is the kind of post I wish manc sean was around to violently react to.

[Baz]

one of the facebook pages I follow is basically a Orlando based Man United supporters group. It's a decent trip on a Saturday morning to one of the pubs downtown to watch the game with fellow Utd folk blah blah blah.

Anyways, today someone posted a video of them walking into OT and it opening up to the pitch or what have you.... Shit I could only dream of at the moment.

Go down to the comments someone posts

"Ah fuck I love that they were playing Tears for Fears lad... GIGGS WILL TEAR YOU APART AGAIN!"

And I think wait... what? Grab the headphones and sure enough it's the Smiths.

Sigh.So close. :happycry:

[Spikey M]

:lol:

[mugbull]

Think that might be one of those elusive triple-tiered jokes

[bruhnaldo]

:p

[Lewis]

Think that might be one of those elusive triple-tiered jokes

I thought that, so I decided to sleep on it in case it was.

[Shindig]

Life would be so much better if Morrissey and Ian Curtis swapped bands.

[bruhnaldo]

why the FUCK isn't Year 3000 by Busted not on Apple Music

this is bullshit

[Spikey M]

Man Utd bought the rights to it when they used it for 'Ryan Giggs Running Down The Wing'.

[Jimmy Floyd]

In about 6-7 years when the Nostalgia Wheel hits Busted, I might have to leave the country.

[bruhnaldo]

Apparently they just released an album not too long ago ironically.

[Spikey M]

In about 6-7 years when the Nostalgia Wheel hits Busted, I might have to leave the country.

Did you miss the McBusted tour Jimmy?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Does that add extra time to the nostalgia wheel or is it irrelevant and we'll just celebrate the classics?

[Baz]

I heart busted.

New album is good.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Did you miss the McBusted tour Jimmy?

I have one llama ffs, not 100.

[phonics]

They seemed more popular with 11 year old children than llamas tbf. I think Westlife was more their scene.

[Spikey M]

I have one llama ffs, not 100.

My mrs went to see them and it's one of the few times I've firmly put my foot down.

'Have you heard Busted and McFly are touring toge...'
TAKE YOUR FUCKING SISTER.

[phonics]

My mrs went to see them and it's one of the few times I've firmly put my foot down.

'Have you heard Busted and McFly are touring toge...'
TAKE YOUR FUCKING SISTER.

I did the same but it was sitting seats for Avril Lavigne about 3 albums past her peak.

[Pepe]

Word is that GS still have the Sk8er Boi single in his car.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Avril Lavigne is amazing.

[bruhnaldo]

She was by far the worst one out of all of them.

[igor_balis]

Busted and McFly were perfectly serviceable for school girls with their non threatening boys charisma, but the songs were fucking shit.

The only pop band I really like from that era is Girls Aloud. Xenomania (the song writing team) are great. Biology is possibly the best pop song of the entire noughties.