Yeah, it's on the south shore. Perhaps a five-minute walk from the beach, tower etc. 2 mins in car. Big car park too which will be handy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
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Yeah, it's on the south shore. Perhaps a five-minute walk from the beach, tower etc. 2 mins in car. Big car park too which will be handy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
If I go then I go with the benefit of a little experience but I don't see how it can go wrong. It either works or it doesn't, if it doesn't then at most I'll waste a few hundred quid and if it does, I'll gain valuable insight and experience whilst topping up the bank balance.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
I'm not exactly tied to anything serious so in my mind, it could be worth a go. I'm not just going to jump into it though.
I assumed he'd be having to buy produce. Didn't realise they'd con him into buying booze too though.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
The hiring people and spending loads up front on food and drink probably means a couple of grand not hundred.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
He doesn't need to hire anyone.
He and 'banana' will give it a once over.
Not to mention the doormen who work Pro bono.
TTH Meet 2019 will be banging.
Count me in!Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
What’s the name of it Tim?
As long as they're not pro Morrissey it'll be fine.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
That was being speculative, I don't actually intend on hiring staff unless it really took off. I think we're thinking different scales at present. I'm thinking fry ups, sandwiches, pic nics, packed lunches. Light meals for lunch, nothing extravagant, your basics like jack spuds and the like. Cheap and cheerful because the hotel/B&B/guesthouse/whatever is cheap to rent so it has to match.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Pies etc I can make and freeze. I'm convinced I can make it work, I wouldn't even need to be open all day. I'm thinking 6 til 6 opening hours, 6-11 breakfast, 12-4 lunch, that's pretty much that. Regardless, I'm surprised it's been ridiculed but then I can't imagine too many of us have experienced the day to day running of a B&B....this one certainly isn't one that requires complete attention, just someone to check guests in, be on site (which we would be due to working ourselves downstairs) and get the Mrs to give the rooms a clean. One of us could do that whilst the other did the rest to be entirely honest. The kitchen side of things given the size will be a walk in the park. I'm used to 150-200 covers a day, asking for 10-20 shouldn't be too difficult.
There's just no way I shall release that info until I'm physically there and in charge. The TripAdvisor comments tell me to run away but so did the Boot Inn.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike
Can't wait to see Smiffy rubbing his fry-up riches in phonics' cunt face.
As far as the breakfast goes, wouldn't it be better to chuck a load of shit on a hot plate and charge a tenner for all you can eat?
As far as I'm aware you can only hold the food for 90 minutes or two hours so it wouldn't be that wise. Also, who wants beans that have been under a light for ages? You can be cheap and cheerful whilst offering quality options and that's the benefit I feel we have on our side.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I'll offer up my plan of action in a more detailed way if I decide to take it on as it's mostly ideas at present but the pro's do sort of outweigh the cons if you look for them. Free digs, no rent, no bills, all maintenance for B&B/Hotel side comes from owners, guaranteed guests (albeit only between 10-20)...in return I manage the B&B/Hotel and keep it ticking over whilst receiving a decent sized kitchen and a small bar lounge to do as I please with. No meddling.
Cons are obviously no secure wage, no staff, bad reviews and owners who seemingly want to get rid of the place. I'm pretty sure that's why so many B&B's there are for sale as once summer ends, so does Blackpool, right?
I can't wait to hear the reviews of the place that 'doesn't actually intend on hiring staff unless it really took off.'
Why are you still commenting when you haven't got a clue what it is, phonics? It's clear as day you don't understand yet you persist in believing you know exactly what is best without even knowing what I have to work with?
Strange child.
The conclusion you should take from literally everyone saying it's a bad idea is to think I'm the weirdo. I just think its funny. Please give some of your 20k a month profit to the TTH fund please. We could run the place on your not officially declared wages alone.
I'll stick some in if you get me my old account back!
That would be work and therefore someone elses job.
Worth remembering that the last thing 'literally everyone [other than Lewis and Pepe]' thought was a bad idea was Mahow going to the Ukraine, and that was a right turn up.
If you're only going to give it a go for a few months to see how it goes, you probably won't lose that much even if it does go badly. Might as well try.
Yev too, as it would be almost impossible to get a blowjob out of it. Lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Oh and THE COLLECTIVE were right about Magic's wife.
Only one person really knew what was going on there: me
How many jobs you had in your life Smiffy?
Lots. I tend to get bored after 6-12 months.
Being self employed is probably not for you, then.
Is it just @phonics who is a designer or @SvN too?
Don’t suppose either of you fancy knocking out a freebie to make an app look pretty? :D
It’s a phone game where the player must guess if a name is that of a horse, or of a beer, called Ale Or Horse. There are a few versions of it in consideration:
Toggle Spoiler
If you have an account on rllmuk you can read about its creation here: https://www.rllmukforum.com/index.ph...make-this-app/
Fucking hell. Prophetic. What a manipulative bitch and just shows how warped my thinking was.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Tip of the cap in fairness, you'll try absolutely anything for a few bob :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Literally anything. :chinny:
Really tempting, but I'll let phonics take this one.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Remember @phonics, you owe me one.
Would it not be easier just to get a couple of nights a week as a takeaway delivery driver if you’re that desperate for extra cash?Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
I’d rather retire.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
@wullie is your only hope now.
And do actual work? :roflol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
Don’t worry lads, it’s all coming together. The designer of this little game has stepped up.
Toggle Spoiler
Can I trust you’ll all rate it five stars when it hits your phones App Store? Please?
Legit looks boss
Mine actually made a decent bit of money in the early days and it was a load of shite.
Link?
Decent start to the year. I've made £800 more than I would have on my old wage lol. After tax, that is.
https://play.google.com/apps/testing...t.ale_or_horseQuote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I meant to @Giggles app.
Mine's gone.
I have an iPhone so can’t test it.
G’wan.
I open all your links in an incognito window so I can't download it from there.
For a country that loves capitalism and supposed efficiency, Americans sure love to waste time pissing about.
Have you ever listened to an American podcast? They're all about 80 minutes longer than they need to be.
Most of their TV 'seasons' are 15 episodes longer than they need to be as well.
The things that Americans say they love and what they actually love are completely opposite of each other.
I've tried many American podcasts, the premise is always great but they're always crap.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
I do like Judge John Hodgman and My brother... though
My boss conveniently forgot to mention I'd be starting to cover at a different facility today, so I've driven approx. 120 miles so far today as my normal facility is approx. 50 miles north of my house and the facility I'm needed to cover at is approx. 30 miles south.
Get to the facility and I don't have access to any of the records for said facility, so I'm basically stuck in fuck off mode for the next 7 hours. There's truly not enough internet to surf.
Bumped into one of the other candidates from the Head of History job I went for back in Feb. Turns out they offered him the job but on about £3k less than what he was already on, so he told them where to go. Just confirms what I thought before about it being something of a blessing in disguise that I didn’t get it.
Or he’s lying to you because he’s heard about the toilet cubicle incident.
I've been sat at court since 10am, somehow my first hearing didn't go in until 11:45. My next one is meant to be at 2 but unless they make up time my - already hour long - commute home is going to hit rush hour square in the face.
Nobody turned up for this mornings and I'm not expecting anyone this afternoon, which makes my life very easy but I will have sat here for 4/5/6 hours for less than 10 minutes of actual work. Fucking hell. I could be with the lads drinking to Eazy.
What did you do?
Your mum :(
Sad.
I think you meant "Lad."
She is a bit but all the bits are in the right places.
I can't even begin to describe what the fuck happened today. Just know that it now involves a Monday morning of getting witness statements for a grievance case.
Fridays are class.
Usually my line manager is off; the gimpy woman who steals my work is off; and the girl who sits opposite me who likes to give me “projects” (her work which she can’t be arsed to do) is off. So the rest of us spend most of the day sitting around chatting.
However usually my bosses boss is usually in, and he sits next to me. But he’s now working his notice so, despite being laid back anyway (honestly he’s proper awesome) he bow clearly gives zero l fucks so Fridays are the ultra doss.
Had a job interview this evening. Bit weird but I'd had a skype interview with them on Friday and was meant to go to their office this afternoon but couldn't get off for it. So they asked if I could meet them for coffee this evening.
Anyway, pretty sure the CEO (it's a start up, I met with the CEO and the CTO) was on coke. He kept sniffing and touching/rubbing his nose loads. He was very animated - lots of gesticulation - and he did nearly all the talking for just over an hour when showing me their product.
Well, that grievance nonsense vanished quickly. Back to normal until he decides to lose his shit again.
I get Wednesday off because the Secret Service have basically asked us to close Portsmouth and nobody can be arsed to battle the traffic. #MAGA #TrumpTrain
Are you going to the RALLY then?
Hay fever? My nose is really itchy and runny of late. He might just be really enthusiastic?Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
The woman who steals my work has handed her notice in. :happycry:
Time to shine.
Probably off to a lovely promotion off the back of a CV filled with your achievements.
Took me twice as long to get into work today. Fuck him. #GreenNewDealQuote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
I considered this but surely if you had bad hayfever you'd have a tissue with you to blow your nose at some point? Or you'd sneeze at some point if your nose was that irritated. Or you'd rub your eyes because they'd be itchy.Quote:
Originally Posted by mo
More than likely a coke fiend. Be very careful about working for them - I've done so in the past and it was a fucking nightmare.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
"I've been awake for four days"
Yeah. They told me last night they'd be making me an offer and spoke to the recruiter today. He's obviously pressuring me towards them and then the coke fiend himself texted me today saying to come see their office today after work.Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
I had another final stage interview with another start-up today though and if they offer me the job (which I'm hoping they will, they were very enthusiastic after the first interview and today was just a chance to meet their CEO who was over from the states), I'll be taking it. The two guys who interviewed me there seemed far more wholesome, what they do is more interesting and I was even impressed by the CEO today (I thought he might be a bit of a gimp because he was American but he seemed really sound).
Also, the guy who I thought was on coke used to live in Sydney and lived and worked in Silicon Valley for a while too. So definitely the right background for it.
Bouldy turning in to the wolf of Ballymoney Street is an interesting and unexpected development.
Even him mentioning a 'CEO' without him wanting to turn in to the burning monk is quite something.
Taking about 'wholesomeness' too. Dem conservative values. :drool:
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Did you look that street name up?
One of them was an older guy in his fifties probably and he just seemed like he'd be a nice fatherly figure type.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
Whereas the other place, well, y'know, the cokehead.
Had the first of two difficult meetings today. Had to tell a long serving employee that they had to start bucking their ideas up. He was fairly agreeable and admitted he'd made some serious errors lately, which almost had me backracking and defending him. He seemed devestated by the fact that he'd cost the business more than he'd earned in revenue last year. I hope he starts improving, because he's a really good guy, and a talented developer. He's just had a bad year for some reason - perhaps it's my shit management.
Tomorrow I'm speaking to a member of staff that I think is completely useless. I'm handing them a bunch of new responsibilities - they don't know it, but it's their chance to save their job. They've been so poor at their actual job that other people have ended up taking on a lot of their responsibilies over the last few years, leaving them with very little to actually do. The problem is, she's the one member of staff that's been here longer than me. I have backing from the co-owner to get rid of her if needed, but I'd rather she just stop being so fucking lazy.
I did. :(Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Couple of opportunities have come up. Not good opportunities, just those inter-departmental ones that means the same money but a chance to add to your skills. Problem being that one of them means talking to the DWP regularly to sort shit out. Might be a nice way to see how the other half live but I've overheard too many conversations where the DWP staff simply hasn't got a clue how their job works. Still, there's very little left in this job for me to learn.
Does moving sideways, even as a means of improving your knowledge, skills, etc., hamper your chances of moving up? Or is there not much chance of that in the immediate future anyway?
At the very least, I hope to move to her desk. It’s by the window and nobody can see your screen.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
I've never really fancied progressing upwards there. We're a sister site and progression usually means working out of Teesside. We've not taken any new staff on for about four years and our contract has two years left. We've got plenty of work to do but head office really like to push for automation, even if it means claimants are inconvenienced. I might put in for this for the sake of doing something new-ish. I troubleshoot on most of the calls that come my way and this just focuses more on that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
In other news, the alcoholic came back to the office today. There was definitely a point where she smelt of hot sick.
I actually enjoy enterprise level stuff. There's much more opportunity to build trust and value. Fuck SMEs.
I find SMEs all to be quite desperate people living stressful lives. Sod that for a game of soldiers. I'll take the corporate dollar any day.
Bar the Civil Service there can't be much worse that working for a 'start up'.
"Wage: £50k*
*if we can afford it. Lol"
https://www.caterer.com/job/bar-mana...medium=organic
Just one snippet from this mesmerising train-wreck of a job ad:
Fuck off.Quote:
"Present; in the soul of house, in the action, happy moving from the RED Sky Bar alive with music, to the events areas and a book reading, over to the lobby where a group are looking for a restaurant recommendation. The phone rings reservation, you’ve got it and now you are flipping an omelette, catch it! This place is alive and you love it. Smile. Photo."
It's sad that the term curator has been lost to the abyss of modern bullshit.
Reads a bit like Allen Ginsberg, which is never a good thing.
Had a 2nd interview yesterday for a job much closer to home, on better pay. I'm feeling fairly positive about it, and it seems like a good opportunity.
Cuts a 100 mile round commute down to about 4 miles if all goes well.
That might be the worst thing I have ever read.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
-'We don't have cooks or busboys, we have CREATIVES!'
-'Our SOPs must be followed to the letter, no deviating from them EVER.'
Alright lads.
Every time I click on that it says it's no longer available so I can't see the actual ad.
It was Smiffy recruiting for his B&B.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Keep scrolling.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Imagine having Smiffy as a boss. You'd really be hit with motivation to turn your life around.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Webly seething because he knows he isn't cool enough for that bar. :harold:
He can't handle the mischief.
I don't need to take this sort of cheek from the mere 3rd best poster on the board.
I'm an awesome boss. I decided against taking the Blackpool offer anyway and gave myself a month off instead.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
Got the job at the 'wholesome' place. Had to ring the recruiter there and tell him I wasn't taking the other one. He was actually really sound about it.
A few years ago I turned down a job I was offered through a recruiter and they were livid. They acted as if I actually owed them something, the silly twats.
I've had the same. I told him the commute was too much for me (over the dartford crossings twice a day at rush hour). The hours advertised were the 'building hours' so I was under the impression the role was outside of rush hour, only to be told at the interview that it was 9-5. That can add an hour to the journey each way. No chance.
He sat on Google maps reading me the commute time (for 11am on a Tuesday) and gave me a roasting for it. Cunt.
Any reason you didn't just hang up?
I genuinely think that recruitment as an industry will largely die in the next decade. There'll be an Uber/Purple Bricks equivalent that employers will start using instead.
I spoke to a recruiter recently about hiring someone. They wanted 20% of their annual salary and if they worked for me for more than 4 weeks, I'd not get a penny back. It's an absolute con.
Recruiters are just salesmen under a different name, and if a salesman loses a sale he thought he had then he will a) seethe and b) claw desperately to recover it.
This won't work everywhere but the firm I work for currently push the refer a friend scheme really hard. They give you a grand if a referral pass probation, which is a good chunk, but is a hell of a lot less than they'd pay a recruiter. We must get things out every month or other month about referring people.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
How many TTHers have you referred?
There's already some places a bit like that.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
I just sent them a link to the members' list.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
I've got high hopes for Pharad.
He's clearly got experience in sales.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Yep, some industries need recruitment - my friend is a recruiter who works in a very specialist field, but there's no way you need a recruiter to find kitchen staff earning £17k per year.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
I wanted an interview for a different job.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
I'm drinking free pints on the company, for once work is not shit.
It will be in the morning.
Early bed as I'll be driving to a job first thing unfortunately. The boss would near be offended if I didn't have a few, so happy to oblige. He gave out to me on the phone one evening before because I wasn't going to charge a few.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
That's not ageless. You're aiming specifically for people of a certain age.Quote:
WE CONNECT WITH THAT AGELESS MILLENNIAL MINDSET
Classic Shindig.
Trying to download CV to laptop. MS Word trial has expired. Don't wish to pay. Any top tips?
Can you save it as a PDF? Way better format to send a CV in anyway.
https://www.libreoffice.org/Quote:
Originally Posted by Mellberg
Or google docs actually, I'd forgot that.
I'd still save and send as a pdf though.
Thanks, but I don't wish to come across as Jeremy Corbyn to any prospective employers.
@ Boyd
Edit: TBF I could save libre as pdf and send that. Thanks lads.
Open it in Google docs then save it as a PDF. Noone at my place bothers with word anymore.
What?Quote:
Originally Posted by Mellberg
Was working from home today. Got asked via IM by annoying manager if I would be willing to travel for work. I asked where to and for how long. She said that wasn't the question so I said well then the answer is 'it depends'.
Then she sent an email to everyone asking about their willingness and ability to travel and any reasons they have for not wanting to travel. She then sent me an IM saying to consider it and respond as per the email. I asked if we could talk about it tomorrow in person (intending to tell them I'd taken the job offer elsewhere) and she was like 'no - I need it today for X' so I was just like "I'm quittin', how'd'ya like them apples?".
Gotta discuss it in a meeting tomorrow morning though. Not looking forward to that.
What did you really say?
That's a pretty shitty attitude to give the place that offered you an entry to the industry, no?Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
I didn't actually say the last part. I just told her (politely) that I had accepted another job offer and would be leaving soon so it was probably best not to factor me into any travel for work.
Also let's not make out like they did me some kind of favour by giving me a job like I was some charity case. They weren't the only offer I had at the time.
There was only one shitty attitude in that and it wasn't from Boydy.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
Is it fuck. The only sensible answer to 'would you be willing to travel for work' is 'how far and for how long?'. If they get shitty about you wanting to base your decision on whether you're travelling to the next town or to fucking Australia then that's on them. Fuck 'em.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
It's a contingency thing, by the sounds of it. They asked us the same questions years back.
Got rid of my fuel benefit today, so that should save me about 250 quid a month in tax. I have to pay for my own fuel now but don't do that much personal mileage.
1) The reply was based on something he now says he made up.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
2) Even in that scenario. It's the way you say how far and how long.
Jesus christ, do you want me to post a transcript
I'm convinced Phonics is autistic.
I thought it would be obvious the last line wasn't what I actually said. I'm a big fanny, I hate confrontation.
Travel as in part of the job or travel as in we're re-locating to China.
I got offered the job I interviewed for last week. Chuffed all around, cuts out 2 hours of driving every day and the role seems fairly interesting.
Now for the awkward part of handing my notice in at my current place.
Binning off a shit commute. :drool:
That's the dream.
The adrenaline from that is hard to match. :drool:Quote:
Originally Posted by thommo
:drool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
I've done about 50,000 miles in just under 2 years driving up and down that same stretch of M4. My car will be glad of the respite too.
You weren't wrong there. Heart was racing! I feel a little bad, as I like the guys I work with here but the job move is a no-brainer really.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
When moving from my last job to this one was the only time I've put in my notice (a few years before that I'd had a shit job where a fixed-term contract was ending and they wanted me to sign a new one but refusing to do so wasn't quite the same) but the place had gone to shit so it was a good feeling and I couldn't wait to have the new one confirmed so I could do it.
As an added bonus our idiot hag of a senior manager never spoke to me for basically any of my last month after that so it was a win on all fronts.
Good stuff. I fucking live for the bullshit pettiness. What kind of mega-spaz expects you to volunteer for travel when you don't know where/how long for?Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
btw - she was obviously trying to shaft you - probably getting you to ship out to India/Kiev and train up some outsource people who'd replace your entire team :nodd:
@mahow job for you mate.Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
Officially resigned now. Got the offer letter from the new place yesterday and felt a bit sad about leaving and that. But then spoke to one of the guys who started around the same time as me (he's been looking out too) and he said he was getting shit from that same manager about not wanting to travel so definitely feel I'm making the right move again now.
I fucking hate printers. There's no one job full of more gatekeeping and more incompetentcy, I swear.
I'm being told that they won't print my flyer because one of the circles is RGB. I sent them this screenshot.
https://i.imgur.com/A8CILeg.png
Still RGB according to this idiot. I haven't had this issue with any printer in my 4 years here. I hate them all.
Turns out some people think switching their monitor off counts as locking their computer when they’re away from their desk.
Daily Mash: Science less than a decade away from fully operational printerQuote:
Originally Posted by phonics
I'm talking about an actual human being here. Fucking useless. I sent exactly the same pdf back to her and now it's CMYK. Fucking bitch. They live to annoy designers.
Why did it matter that it was supposedly RGB? Shouldn't they still be able to print it?
Once the job is complete you need to email back and tell her you sent the same file again. Office pettiness :drool:
I already did after thanking her for her quick reply that took an hour. I have no patience for these people.
That's a pretty shitty attitude to give the place that offered you an entry to the industry, no?
Oh. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by phonics
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Lol
The machines are dickheads as well tbf.
Go all Office Space on it/her/everything in the office, I'm sure you could get your hands on a baseball bat.
I don’t work for a printers.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Alright, Pavel.
Anyone able to go through my CV for me lads?
I mean I've read enough to know the ones I personally don't like but that doesn't necessarily mean I know what an actual good one is.
My top tip is don't have Word Art as your header.
No pay rise this month it seems. Union's rejected their offer. Hope this doesn't drag of for six months like the last one.
*Removes Word Art*Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
'There's a few months here that need filling in...'
I'm sure he did some sort of job while in there, no?
*Hygiene technician*
:D
Looking back it was quite nice not having to graft.
Was that making sure the soap didn't touch the floor?Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
I'll defer to the expert.
I’ve been doing this ‘House Leader’ role for the past year - it’s not much, assembly every half term, school/charity event organisation etc and paid about £500 for the year. Had a meeting with the Co-Heads yesterday where they told me that the job is now going to be done by a sixth former (unpaid of course). Stings a bit to be told that they think a 16/17 year old can do the same job (especially as they’ve been fucking useless this year) but whatever.
They’ve also just gone from 5 to 3 heads of year (so no opportunity there for me) and will probably scrap the second in department role as well. Still, at least we’ve got a huge senior leadership team and that will definitely improve pupil progress.
Gonna have my fucking hands full next week. :moop:
:face: I called the job I agreed to take in Surrey this morning and opted against it. It's been a couple of weeks now and I really don't know what I want to do.
:moop:
So a couple more interviews the last two days and I think I'm set on the south coast again. I have to share this though because it boggles the mind how it even gets responses but sure enough, I've had more than a few this last week.
My CV.
https://i.imgur.com/4BoaXr4.png
Personally I think it's a masterpiece.
:cab:
I am also surprised you've been getting responses.
It gets worse, Baz.
The remainder.
https://i.imgur.com/zu2Cfws.png
Fucking hell :D
That bit under your latest job reads like a post on here.
Guernsey really is an island of Front-Line Security Officer.
If you haven't created that for comedy effect to post on here then I don't know what to say.
I've seen a lot of CVs and honestly, I'd probably recommend this one for interview just so I could meet the nutter who wrote it.
I'm 100% serious.
Fact is this, if I kept the properCV then it's just going to get lost among the rest but if I get so much as phone call or an interview then I've pretty much got the job. I thought it would stand out and although I was only have assing the applications, it's the one that keeps getting the replies.
Perhaps that's what potential employers think. I then use the gift of the gab to talk about pretty much anything other than the job I've applied for.
I'm basically Boris Johnson right now.
Where's my wine box...
Jesus.
Why are people not instantly shredding that?
The honest nature of the applicant screams off the page? I even masked my weaknesses which is basically all of it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
Things like 'pizza's' is probably more likely to get it binned. Good work Smiff.
Job above in Dundalk got cancelled at about 3pm today which was a real bonus seeing as I was in west Cork for 9am. Time for a brown bottle :cool:
Pizza can get fucked tbh. I've got more scars on my arms from being burnt by that pizza oven than I have scars from being a prick.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Got paid 5k this month. :cool:
*£2.5k, she'll get half.
*£2k He'll spend £500 on dating apps
I can’t see Smiffy’s CV on mobile. Need to see how justified the reactions are.
"I didn't even like cars." :D
:cry:
I started my holiday 20th of this month and the next time I’m back in is January 13th.
Life is great 😎
What??
Is that what they call being sacked in Finland?
That doesn't even count as a job.
Holiday, holiday extra pay I swapped for more holiday and paternity leave.
I’ll be home with the boy as the missus goes back to work. We do have quite a bit of holiday as a whole family though.
That’s six months though.
Almost seven. A part of it is not paternity leave, but I don’t know the term for the leave either parent can use until the child is three.
We call it the dole.
We have that too, but it’s not the same as I actually have a job. The dole would pay better for the last two months though.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
It's called a decent welfare state. We don't have that.
We fund them though. #Brexit
I am moving to Norwich.
They already have a random legend.
One of the best places in England, that.Quote:
Originally Posted by igor_balis
Sama is pretty great, it's true.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
13 hours travelling on buses isn't my idea of fun in today's heat. Jesus.
I arrived in Dorset for my new job and wow, it's beautiful. Durdle Door just a couple of miles down the road. I definitely prefer this beach to Talacre which is nearest to mine. Hopefully I'll stay here now until November, take December off and then January 2020 I'm going it alone. Not Blackpool but I'm going to have somewhere.
Monthly pay is gonna be a bitch though, it's been a while. :moop:
Just finished at my job there. Start the new one on the 16th. Feel quite sad. :(
Where are you? Weymouth?Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
Swanage but I'm leaving today to go back to Oxford. It's a nice cushy job, 8-2, 6-9.30 with weekends off but this entire week has been so slow that I think I'll go out my mind. I like to keep busy and you can't do that after breakfast in the place I'm currently at.
I used to go to Swanage loads as a kid. Is it still a nice seaside town, or is it a druggy toilet now?
It's very nice to be honest, nice and clean which is pleasant. Hard to gauge in a week when the weather has been spot on though.
I had intended to message you at some point as I saw on that map you were near ish. I was going to get us both out for an evening just to break TTH if anything. Alas it's not to be!
We could both make the end of summer kickabout.
Next meet I'll make a conscious effort to attend. It's well overdue.
When my till was over two of my colleagues were saying I needed to withdraw to fix it, to which I was like "nah if you're over, you need to pay IN, cus, like, the till is telling me there's 500 quid more than should be there - if i pay that into an account it accounts for it", and they were not having it. Eventually it got to the point where they were doing Lineker re: Gazza "he's fucking lost it" looks at each other as I tried to insist, correctly, that if your till is over you need to pay in not withdraw. The only way I managed to convince them was to withdraw like they said, run a balance, then show I was even more over. At which point they just went like "oh yeah". FFs
I'm sure you've said this before but which bank?
The bank I use in my town only has one manned till and 3 self service and there's still way too much shit that needs to be done by an actual person so there's always a queue. They always have someone asking everyone in the queue what their business is to potentially shift them to the machines but I've never seen someone get moved over.
Just in the door after a whore of a week. Haven't seen the gaff since last Monday morning.
Haven't been in NI in ages and have two days booked in for this week, of all fucking weeks. Two of the worst places to be going too.
Why of all weeks? Is this marching season?
Marching season is about 4 months up there but this Thursday to Saturday are the big ones. They're extra militant this time of year.Quote:
Originally Posted by niko_cee
You might want to leave the buckle hat and shillelagh in the passenger footwell.
I'll be stopping for nothing. Come across Glenanne Snake and the lads doing a fake checkpoint and you'd end up as kindling on Thursday.
Might just pull a dose and let someone else go.
.
Whereabouts are you meant to be going?
Portadown tomorrow and Ballymena Wednesday.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Get your checkpoint clobbber out Boydy.
I didn't get sacked today which was nice.
I did wonder that. Was sure that's who you said you were working for.
What's the atmosphere like? We did a raft of redundancies the last few years but they were with months of warning. This seems very abrup, or has it been rumoured?
Glad you weren't sacked though. Obvs. :thbup:
I think it's been a different story over in that part of the business where poor market conditions has been prevalent for a while. The press have been reporting these rumours for a while and I imagine if you were in those businesses, you'd probably have feared the worst.
I wasn't really over there so can't tell you anything you haven't read in the press. I think I'm okay but this sort of transformation is painful.
You work for DB? :nono:
Lol not so smug now are you. Looking forward to asking you to open my account in a local building society.
Yeah it's hideous when this sort of thing is going on.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Have a glass of vinho verde to relax mate.
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Fuck that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Leave Igor alone.
I know. Will need an offshore account soon with my comish levels.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
I'd imagine redundancies of that size don't feel out of the blue. My two banking ones had years of wind up.
When you live in an independent Scotland, you can open an offshore one in the free city of Bristol.
Quoting for prophecy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Enjoy Bristol.
Your teller job in Gateshead is not the same as a global private banking/"wealth management" business being outed as the biggest crooks in a game full of crooks. They're dismantling before the cops come through the door. They'll have completed the shredding process so now time to sack anyone that didn't know enough and pay-off anyone that did.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
Lol nice assessment from the black and white reactionary tin man.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
That's not really what's happened and the description is incorrect. It's DB's equity trading desks that are being wound up which has nothing to do with private banking or wealth management (two areas which are part of the core business).
The problem is lack of profitability and they're not the only European bank struggling e.g. Credit Suisse and a whole raft here . The trade wars between US and China have had an impact as have negative interest rates in Europe.
I'm going off what happened at HSBC when my then room-mate was working there. Cops went to the wrong building (they've got two) and it was shredders a gogo.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Yeah I'm sure the huge swathes of money laundering have nothing to do with it. You can only get away with doing it in the US for so long before you fall out of favour, look at UBS and our 'Americans hide your money here' scheme.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Didn't the Germans just postpone the reckoning up that London/New York had ten years ago by killing Greece?
HSBC are the dirtiest I reckon. There's the obvious reason why, then there's also what I know from working there.
If Tronald puts some big banks out of business I might even vote for him next time. :drool:
Having Donald as a customer probably hasn't helped.
Are you sure your room mate didn't get arrested for being a nonce.
How was your adventure smoke?Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
You won't get a vote where you're going, mate.:(Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
France?
Deporting Mexico to France is the sort of thing Trump might try as an election promise, to be fair.
From what I've seen here. It's similar to Liverpool/City, these two are in a league of their own imo. UBS are shady but they're just copying off the big boys. BNP Paribas are a similar type of arsehole to the rest of them but they're feeding off crumbs in comparison.Quote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
JPMorgan seem to fly under the radar here but considering their size they must be as knees deep in it as the top 2. They're very minimal though, you wouldn't know their office if you didn't work there.
Terrible. I snuck round the back and listened to gangster rap with my headphones only to find out later my daughter had been crying. #fathers4justiceQuote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
Yeah, that is pretty bad. Should have got Waff to come round and babysit whilst you got the bus somewhere quiet.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Barclays is* the worst.Quote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
Toggle Spoiler
*In 2011.
That lad looks like James.
Paying 1% is something to be proud of these days. Nowadays you just move any profit to Ireland and declare a loss.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Signed contract today for old position. I was hourly last time but now salaried, it won't make too much difference but a few more benefits with salary than hourly as last time I'd get sent home early if quiet and holidays were less I think.
£21K a year which isn't too bad considering my level, I think an experienced CDP would get around £22-23 so I can't complain.
Booked a four hour course in Marylebone at the end of the month which looked handy. Knife skills and different cuts, the mother sauces and filleting fish. £150! Ouch.
Pay review came in today. 0.75% :moop:
Submitted my request to move desks. :drool:
Would anyone like to take a wild swing at which bank was involved in bankrolling the paedo?
Spent half the day on a remote fault finding session on the phone to two middling English speakers in Katowice. Christ, I'd rather dig holes for 12 hours straight.
:D I'm not actually senior enough to open accounts. I could book you an appointment though, @Magic.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Ever since I started there’s been talk of my team moving to the old banged up building that used to be the library in the town centre, but closed as a library due to it being unsafe. The office I currently work in is pretty swish and I was happy seeing it was just office gossip.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
We’ve now been given a moving date. :moop:
And it’s when I’m on holiday so I’ll get the worst spec. :moop:
The building is horrific, doesn’t have a lift (I’ll be on the 2nd floor), everywhere’s damp and it smells like school trips to a museum.
Ah well, hopefully I will at least get to enjoy the best desk in the current place for four weeks.
Following on from that. The stupid fat lesbian who doesn’t actually have a job role has moved to the desk I wanted. :moop:
And just now my bosses boss just rang up to speak to my boss but she’s out. “do you have access to <a certain contract> to tell me how much we contribute?”
YES. THAT IS MY JOB. I LOOK AFTER THE CONTRACTS. OF COURSE I DO. :mad:
I swear everyone thinks I’m just an apprentice, here to make brews and print stuff.
It's just a nicer, less direct way of telling you to do something.
Finished my first week at the new job. Really like it so far. Small team of five (including me, a sixth is joining in September) in our office and everyone's really nice. The work's a lot more interesting than my last job too.
Startup tier?
Yeah.Quote:
Originally Posted by mugbull
Did you take the job with the geezer that's going to stick all his profits up his nose or a different one?
Different one.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I just enjoyed two glorious days off and then went in expecting a long week. Off tomorrow and Tuesday too. Banging. :cool:
I spent four hours cleaning a walk in fridge, stripped it bare and went to town before joining in service for the evening whereby I did pretty much sod all. As much as I like the days off, it bugs me that when I go back in I have to rearrange my section back to as it was and having to use what has been prepared by one of the other chefs. It's only little things but I do julienne cuts for my duck salads as it tangles in amongst the watercress better but this prat just shaves it with a peeler so it's wafer thin slices of carrot and mooli which looks shit. Leaving the tiniest bit of whatever in a container being another. Why would you wrap it up and pack it up when there's not even enough for a portion?
I've tried talking to him but his English isn't the best and he clearly doesn't understand my accent. Rabbit in headlights look but it's pissing me off.
I just found out the office drunk got so pissed last week she came back into work at 7:45pm thinking it was the next day. Wow.
Last day in work until September.
I always feel jealous of teachers at this time of year but then I remember what they have to do for the rest of it.
My wife is off until April. Holiday then maternity leave starts just before she's due back.
That's seriously short holidays for a teacher.
I think a new career change is in order ha. FML it's beyond roasting.
I remember when I did work experience in a kitchen during secondary school. I keep volunteering to get anything from the walk in fridge/freezer.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
I deep cleaned that fucker on Sunday. A nice four hours but it was nowhere near as hot. I just got absolutely slammed for lunch service too.
Tomorrow scares the life out of me as we're due a hotter one and I already know we've got a lot of tables booked. I honestly don't know how people can eat meals in this weather, just a nice easy bite surely?
Glad I’m not the only one - most of the country seemed to break up on Friday!
Had a meeting today and the guy was wearing a three piece suit. I was wearing shorts and t-shirt.
Was he an employee, because that's ridiculously unprofessional if not.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
It was a client. I work at a creative agency, not a bank.
Fair play to him taking it seriously, then.
That was honestly one of the hardest days works I've ever had, I found cementing driveways in Canada easier and it was even hotter then.
I am most definitely not looking forward to tomorrow. It's the hottest day out the lot, isn't it? On the plus side, I smashed it throughout although evening became a little wobbly as I was jumping on starters and mains, it's the mains section that I'm trying to learn but it's difficult when you're only doing it in dribs and drabs, I'd rather have a few straight shifts on it.
Which are the best languages to learn when it comes to coding? I've been pissing about with HTML but I'd like to get proper stuck in since I've got a lot of free time at work.
I don’t know the correct answer but if I had time to learn, the one I’d aim for is React.
If it's web stuff you're interested in, javascript is your best bet. You can do other stuff with it too but it's primarily a frontend (making shit move around and respond to the user on the page) web language.Quote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
You can use it on the backend (server stuff that dictates what you see when you go to a url/click on a link etc) too with NodeJs.
Freecodecamp is good and should be easily enough accessed from your work.
Java (completely different from javascript) or python are good shouts too if you're looking for a career in it.
React isn't a language on its own, it's a framework for javascript. It'd be best to learn javascript first.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Cheers. I'll give javascript a go then. At what point did you end up applying for a developer role? I'm not sure if it's something I want to solely pursue, but I figure it's probably the best use of my spare time at the moment. Is it common for people to design as well as develop?
I did a masters conversion course so about a year after starting that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
A mate of mine taught himself python and got a job with it after about a year though. Depends how much time you've got to dedicate to it, I suppose.
I don't think it's all that common for people to do design and development but I could be wrong. @SvN would know more about that than me.
There was some boring email went round work this morning about a reward scheme, and then one an hour later saying it was malicious and if you’d clicked on the link you had to turn your computer off immediately and report it to IT.
So I went back to the original email, clicked on the link and then shut my PC down. :baz:
@Offshore Toon
If you're serious about going into web stuff, HTML and CSS are a must before you start moving onto anything else. You don't need to be an expert, but you need to fully understand the basic principles of how the web works - especially if you want to learn something like React.
Vanilla JS is a good starting point before you move onto frameworks, as Boydy said.
10 or so years ago, you were expected to code if you were a designer. Since then, "development" has branched off into so many different subsets that it's no longer that common for someone to do both. It's also quite rare that someone can be creative and a competent coder - most people are either one or the other.
The scenes when they figure out you clicked the link after the email came out :drool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Okay, cool. Appreciate the advice. I'll just see how I get on for now then.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
What kind of personality are you Toon?
I'd reccomend following SvN's advice with the HTML/CSS. Get yourself a pirated copy of Photoshop/Illustrator and put together a couple of projects with/for mates and see which things kept your attention more. The only way you get anywhere with either field is through repetition. If you're just pissing about and want a side-thing to learn I'd recommend pissing about with Ableton and plugins as that's already your scene.
My boss won't let me wear shorts in the same office out IT guys are wearing NFL tops and World of Warcraft t-shirts.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
Came offshore on Monday after a week of annual leave. Was due off on Thursday. Flight cancelled. Was due off on Friday. Flight cancelled.
So here I am, at 8am on a Saturday awaiting a helicopter to take me home to salvage my weekend.
Fog is now my least favourite form of weather.
And Helicopters might be my least favourite form of transport.
And now she’s been signed off sick for four weeks :panda:Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
I do not disagree there. I am contractually obliged to come 4 times a year, so I plan on being on one 8 times a year until I find a new job.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
Piss all over it and mark your territory while she's away.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
On the way to being replaced by artificial intelligence. Sweet.
Not here though mate. :console:
Who on here works with taxes and financial affairs?
Last day today then off for two weeks, which coincides nicely with the bank holiday, so my next day in is 27th August. :drool:
Interesting day today. Easy enough time on the phones but there was one claimant I skipped calling on the grounds that his Islamophobia would become a nightmare to organise an appointment around.
I had my mid-year review today. I told them I'm bored and that the shitty salary was beginning to annoy me (they were threatening to upgrade us six months ago, to contextualise that a bit), and they just said 'Well yeah...' and told me I'm too young to settle there anyway. Sorted.
I have an interview somewhere else next week, and me leaving will probably end up forcing the salary upgrade. Go Team.
What's it for?
Lewis donning it. :cool:
Policy analysis stuff, which is probably the best path for me because 1) I don't have a scientific background; and 2) I don't want to live/work in London.
I need to find something else in London. My boss is ridiculously lazy and has incredibly poor decision making skills. I was excited by the prospect of a blank canvas, but now I realise that some canvases are blank for a reason.
I fancy making good money again so may have to go corporate.
'What do you think are the main defence challenges facing the country?'Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
*don't say it*
'OUR PRIORITIES ARE WRONG AND HAVE BEEN FOR SIXTY YEARS!'
It would have been good working there as well.
Just write to you know who, make it about 50,000 words and say you refuse to work in London. He'll start you ten minutes later.
What should our priorities be?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Not that I even know what our defence priorities have been for the past 60 years.
Invade everywhere I'd imagine.
Basically not pretending to be a global power. I don't think the answer was necessarily a shit one. The problem was that their follow-up question was, knowing what I know about them, what can they do about it? Had I given a n00b answer like Iran or 'hybrid warfare' I could have said something that sounded clever; but as a follow-up answer to mine you're stuck with 'You tell me mate not a lot I imagine'.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
That's a fair assessment. We might be top of the European pile (or second to Switzerland) but we don't have the sway without the colonies.
You're welcome :)
Still going strong in current job but I think I might just give it until the New Year then look for something a little better. It's a difficult place to judge as it can be mad busy one minute, dead the next and the area is starting to grind on me. £15 taxi single fare to the nearest town, nearest shop a good thirty minute walk away, bus stop a good twenty. It bugs me that if I have a day off then I either stay in or have to make a day of it and not having anywhere to gatecrash after work is slightly annoying.
This week I've been on the main pass more which is good but I really lack the 'bounce' that I have on my own section and actively have to think about the dishes I'm playing due to being unfamiliar with them. It doesn't help that I don't actually like too much of what we serve but menu change in a few weeks so it'll get interesting again, I hope.
£2.5k wage rise for merely existing.
Of all the countries I look after, ze Germans are really beginning to piss me off. One thing I didn't quite have nailed about their national character is that because they live by ze rules and don't have a jot of creativity in them, it also causes them to cry like little girls, proper bawling, in the event that anything goes wrong. Even the French are mature enough to realise that shit happens (particularly when dealing with spare parts) but if the same thing happens in Germany they get a 20,000 word expert report from independent expert Dr Helmut von Frankenstein and expect full costs, then send empty threats about court action when we lol them off.
Poland is the best country to deal with. Those guys know the score.
Saw the automation do its thing today. Very odd setup where we have to confirm it's doing the right thing. I had no problems so I reckon by December they'll be pitching that to our overlords. Some of the old guard are moaning and refusing to work with it. :D
4 days off now. Pool filling up in the back garden as we speak. Everything needed for a barbecue in. :drool:
What sort of automation?Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
Confirming it's doing the right thing is you training it to replace you.
Capacity release mate. Totally different. Can reallocate him to do high value activity.
Current job has hired a couple of people from my old place, but that was alright because they're all decent sorts. Thought they were about to hire an absolute cretin we know without having bothered to ask any of us what he's like but thankfully he doesn't seem to have got it.
It's genuinely made my Friday.
Basically, our main job is keying information from one form to another. It's dumb but DWP would very much like to keep their data and not hand it off to any third party. Hence, 120 or so of us are copy and pasting our way through most of the day. The AI they've set up wants to do that. It's currently a 1 to 1 situation where a desktop effectively covers one operator. If it was going solo, it'd probably equate to five or six people working 12 hour shifts with no breaks. So, yeah, not gonna wipe us out. There's also the added complication of our contract with DWP being up in two years. And DWP have to approve this.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
As for other shit, we've already transitioned into working the phones. I don't think that's got much more scope but who knows what the DWP will decide to do with our contract and workloads. And whether our company decides to secure work elsewhere.
Oh shit, I'd have automated that ages ago. Perfect candidate for RPA. You don't need ai for that from your description.
You wonder how they manage to fuck up these IT projects despite spending a bajillion pounds while taking longer than your average government lasts and then you find out they're paying hundreds of people to manually edit the DWP database in 2019. My word.
We're on Windows 7.
And our special printer has been bust for six months.
I had a cunt with Windows 95 a couple of weeks ago.
Actually, RPA does sound like what's going on.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
@Lewis I'm on Windows 10 now. And our printers are also terrible. A case can be made for not printing at all, really.Quote:
These tools also automate interactions with the GUI, and often do so by repeating a set of demonstration actions performed by a user.
We are in the middle of doing this for some of our more 'brainless' activities as a toe in the water for future development. Unfortunately we kept it in house (read cheap) and the dev process has almost been going on a year. This is only for some report running and formatting too.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
I wanted to laugh at this corporate wank but I think I have said pretty much all of this when talking about it. :face:Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
:cool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Best version.
I made the upgrade on my desktop as support is ending soon :(Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
Probably better, no? No more updates to deal with.
It's why we're moving to 10. That's a lot of new equipment in such a short space of time, too.
Finally had my classroom computer upgraded to Win10 (last one done I think) but annoyingly when I want to switch to project what’s on my screen it displays fine on the board but my screen goes to like 800x600 res and hides the bar at the bottom. Nothing’s ever straightforward.
Yeah, I have to say this to most of the teams to get them to work with us. "It's not about replacing your job, it's about giving you more time to do the core activity"Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny
In reality, we are hiring X number of people to download files, do a bit of formatting then start the work. The first bit takes 90% of the time which means we need more people doing mechanical stuff and waiting for systems to load.
Who knows what will happen when we actually are able to add some intelligence on top. At the moment, it's only the brainless, rule based stuff that can be automated but the potential is limitless.
We haven't hired anybody new in over three years so it's clear which way the wind's heading with this place. Plus every company bulletin contains something about supercomputers or AI learning.
From my experience, unless you're in a FAANG company, that's not reality for most companies. AI and supercomputers are miles away.
I'm off today but as of next Monday I am being moved onto the sauce section for two weeks so I'll get to do some actual proper cooking during a service. :drool: This is the part I've been waiting for as I'm convinced I can do it. I can do the simple stuff like burgers and fish etc but steaks are a weakness as I've only really cooked them for myself. It seems like it'll be easy but steak nights on Thursday's get slammed so doing so many should be interesting.
Something is definitely happening behind the scenes that I'm unaware of, old head chef returned off his travels, new head chef about to go on his hols after two other chefs come back, one of whom has an op so will be out of action for two months which has opened the door for me somewhat. I reckon I could potentially get to Jnr Sous by January and I have a slight hunch that that's what work think too as they seem to be asking me to do more and more.
This weekend was carnage though and the heat just kills you.
Back to work today. 90 minutes of being told results were crap, you've got to do better and we're going to be keeping a closer eye on you now, a break, an hour of being patronised and then an 'ice breaker' activity with new staff in department. I did at least get some time to get some work done for myself. More of this shit tomorrow.
I spent the whole day sat next to someone who smelled of sick. Count your blessings.
We had a new lad start today and it’s not busy enough for him so I informed the higher-ups that I’m not training a potential replacement and they can rethink that idea. Interview Wednesday anyway so hopefully that’ll be that issue solved.
My new consultant is baller. She apologised to me today because she's not managed to let me go home early many days yet :drool:
My last post said it was my day off before I got called in. Today was also meant to be my day off until I got called again in to make it 13 on the spin. I am absolutely broken physically.
I haven't started on the sauce section as planned but Wednesday I will be so that should be fun
I do feel like I'm learning more and getting better but not as fast as I would like. I still need to work in a cleaner manner whilst maintaining my current speed during service but it's hard. I also need to stop overlooking little things. We don't run a lunch menu on Sunday for example so I didn't need to unwrap a certain gastro, today I got caught short finding out I didn't make Tzatziki which goes on one of the dishes.
Is there a reason why you can't say "no"?
I currently have a desktop PC but was recently told I had a choice between a Surface Pro Tablet or Surface Laptop. Obviously I’m gonna choose a laptop cos I’m at a desk 99% of the time and I’m not a child. Was on holiday when the choice was made and my line manager “isn’t sure” which she picked. :moop:
The tablet will have a keyboard attachment.
It does, I’ve seen them cos lots of people have them already but they seem like floppy pieces of rubbish that always fall down. Plus you can’t have it on your lap and type, should the need arise.
Surface pro tablet is shite as a work pc. More problems than it's worth. Better just having a laptop.
Or even better, a PC like a normal person.
You won’t put a PC on your knee.
Not if you are a normal person.
See that's America right there. Have a desktop so it's a 9-5 attitude.
Over here it's laptop central so we can work from home. Aye. Good one.
Are you only allowed to have one computer or what? Also, lol at the US having a 9-5 attitude. I wish.
What’s wrong with the Surface Pro as a work laptop anyway? It has Windows 10 and from looking at specs you can get exactly the same numbers as the Surface Laptop. Is the detachable keyboard really bad or is it just too small?
It doesn’t stay open if it’s on your knee. You need it on a table.
And yeah it’s with a view to working from home, which I don’t mind cos I can skive more easily.
I think they gave us an early version and it's a sack of shit.
Had to restart it twice today after taking it to a meeting.
The little box connector you need is a pain too. The tablet only has one USB.
For light email use it'd be fine. If you're ramming a load of software and digital security stuff on there it's horrid.
Ah yes that makes sense. When I was looking at specs I hadn’t thought of ports.
If its a Pro 6 it should be fine as long they invest in a dock for you.
I have the 15in Book 2 set up with the dock and two monitors on it and really like it.
I've got a surface book 2 and it's superb. Only downside is having three monitors seriously impacts performance so I've reduced down to two.
It does? Although I suppose you will tax it more for work than I do sat at home with occasional gaming on it!Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
I use mine with two monitors + the book screen but was contemplating upgrading to a 3rd actual monitor. I have the one with the 1060 in it if it makes any difference.
Does your machine handle games ok with the 1060? Mine’s a complete shit heap even without an external monitor.Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny
I have never been a PC gamer but yeah I would say it does ok.
I have played PUBG with a few people on here and handled that pretty well, it has been a while though. Recently I have tried Siege, CSGO and Rocket League and they all ran well. It is just fiddly to ensure its using the Nvidia GPU.
The SurfaceGaming subreddit has people testing games on various machines and has some tips.
https://www.reddit.com/r/SurfaceGaming/
Mine’s an XPS but has the same graphics card. Which is, as you say, if it’s actually using it at all. It’s a fiddly piece of crap so I just bought an Xbox instead.Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny
I run 2 external monitors and the built in screen. However, mine are all running in 4K mode - perhaps that's why? It seems to be more of a power issue than anything, as everything is powered by the single power cable.Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny
Yeah I think there is issues with running two external 4K monitors at 60hz.
There is a guy on the surface subreddit who sells docks and he wrote up a decent guide on it. I likely wont get a 4k monitor for a little while yet so will likely be something to worry about if/when they bring out the Book 3.
https://dancharblog.wordpress.com/20...iple-monitors/
Have any of you done PRINCE2? Or have any opinions on it.
I think Kiko and/or Adamski have. It's pretty well known and respected across the tech industry.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
They're stepping up their efforts on the automated stuff now. Should deal with about a third of the stuff coming in. Thank fuck I'm trained on other things.
Absolutely haven't done Prince 2. Fuck project managers.
Thanks pal.
I’ve done it, yeah. I guess it’s something employers look for but I’ve never applied anything I learned from it in any job.
It’s not flexible at all so when you come across something a little out of the ordinary it falls on its arse as a methodology IMO.
All those things are impractical and just another line for the CV.
I did a Prince2 foundation thing about a decade ago and had entirely forgotten about it until reading it there.
Thats my sole intention.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Work are either stopping being involved with everything I do, or giving it to other people to work on. So before they realise I am surplus, I figured I’d use some of their budget to make my CV look a bit better.
Not quite as bad as the bloke who left in July who authorised payment for himself to attend a “well-being at work” course, while working his notice period, who then left to become Head Of Wellbeing (or something as equally hippie) at some big utility company.
Personally, I think it's great we have a booking system that allows two or more people to reserve the same appointment slot. :moop:
We have a right dick head of a manager at work. She's about 97 and she enjoys belittling people. Well, on Wednesday she did it to one of the team for asking 'have we sorted lunch breaks out?'. It's a fair question, we've always been told to sort them out to ensure we don't all go at the same time. Anyway, for no reason at all she huffed and puffed before saying 'well it's pretty obvious who is going when. Why do you always have to panic about it?'.
No idea what her problem is, but it pissed the whole team off,. So in an act of defiance we deliberately didn't sort out lunch breaks yesterday, ignored her in beautiful, blistering silence when she asked if it had been sorted, and all went to lunch the second she got back from hers.
The proper manager is in today, so we'll pay for it, but it's the first revolt I've ever been involved in. :drool:
One of my colleagues lost Germany to me a few months ago and has been a bit resentful ever since, as he only got puny Holland in return and so often has nothing to do when the UK is quiet. After several weeks of quiet seething, he went in to see the big boss about it. In response the big boss has given him a new task which is to go out into the warehouse when it's quiet and work on the photography catalogue of every single item in our range.
I tried not to laugh when he was complaining about that as well.
I didn't get the policy job, and here is the lol feedback:
The opinion stuff annoys me given that 1) they specifically asked for my opinion[s]; and 2) I kept referring back to actual published academic work that I've done all by myself, which obviously met logical and 'evidence-based' standards otherwise it wouldn't exist and they wouldn't have greeted me as 'Dr Betts'. The rest of it though get fucked it's not Love Island.Quote:
Lewis expressed some interesting views around challenges facing Defence, showing that he could provide challenge. However, the board felt that his views would have been more persuasive if they had been better supported by a logical or evidence-based argument - his points came across as opinion-based, even when given the opportunity to expand his views. Lewis may wish to consider ways to demonstrate competencies and interpersonal skills, both through good interview preparation, but potentially through other means such as involvement in non-work related activities for example voluntary work, sports or other hobbies.
Maybe switch it up from milk to orange juice at the bar to show off your spontaneous side.
The second bit is lol. People always love the cricket stuff on my CV. I added 'ECB qualified umpire' to it recently and had a sudden vision of bathing in gold coins as employers will finally have real evidence of my decision-making skills under pressure.
I don't put any personal stuff on my CV. Partly because I'm supremely boring and "I had a really nice saison the other day" isn't going to help matters and the only interviews I've done where I've ever thought to use that stuff from other people's CVs is where they're giving me so little while not seeming like a dickhead that I'm just trying to get them talking about something to find out if they're going to be any good or not.
Lewis getting done by the bureaucracy is pretty lol. I do love the 'be evidence-based' shit on one side, and 'be a better lad' on the other.
I've got too fat to get away with 'going to the gym' as my stock answer to the hobbies question, so I can never apply for a job again.
The only personal stuff they asked me was what I did to 'keep going' during my unemployment (which is shorter on my CV than it was in reality), and I basically said that I was unemployed not ill so I just cracked on with life because I'm not a mimsy cunt. Whatever. I think my face just didn't fit, which I thought might have been the case. But I'm old enough to hear that. I don't need two out of seven for 'delivering at pace' after I told you I'm nine months ahead of my current annual targets just so you can give me a crap overall score.
Did I read that right? On your feedback, they rated you as a candidate to be a 2/7?
I think the only time I've put personal stuff on my CV is when I was applying for moderator jobs with Tombola. Even had DM as a reference. Thank fuck I found some proper work.
No, I got two out of seven for that specific competency. I also got one out of seven for teamwork, which is wank because 1) I'm a one man band in my current role (and obviously was in academic terms); and 2) they then gave me six out of seven for 'experience', even though those two things form part of the overall experience criteria along with general subject knowledge and that. It's a bit nonsensical overall I think.Quote:
Originally Posted by Panda Bear
What shithole scores out of 7?
Jesus
Head up though wee man. You’ll get the next one.
lolled at "wee man".
I'd rather hear about the make-up of Lewis' office. The ex-civil service lot in our place are the biggest whoppers by miles. This week off couldn't have come at a better time.
It's half ex-services doing it as a semi-retirement doss job, half civil servants re-deployed from elsewhere working around them, and then a couple of wallies creating problems out of thin air and calling it management.
Sounds about right. It's always odd how the worst ones survive because the decent managers simply don't want to deal with them. So they put them with a manager equally inept. Seniority should count for nowt when you're down to 40% productivity and loudly trying to rearrange your smear test.
Yeah, that's how my week went. :moop:
They'll have known who was getting the job ahead of time.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
When I was working for the MOJ the 'A Band' used to straight up tell people to apply for specific jobs, and coincidentally that person always ended up getting the role. It's how I got my promotion.
'Fair and open competition is a load of bollocks when the interview panel have been told the result ahead of time.
So I did the evening on the Wednesday and it was quiet so not much doing, I was then meant to do it the following day but that got switched up much to my annoyance which I then expressed by my mood suddenly changing. Weird. Anyhow, chef fixed it and had me back on a few days later and then shit hit the fan. At first I was told it would me just me and another working the Sunday, which in my mind was way too much too soon but thankfully a few tweaks meant that isn't happening, instead it happened today. It was myself and two others with me running sauce section (that's the daddy section) after just two previous efforts entirely on my own. GM put on a reduced menu for lunch which was appreciated but then we agreed to put full one on for evening service. Today I did 124 covers. It might sound wank to you lot but I am so proud of myself right now. Last night I was nervous as fuck because I just didn't know if I had it in me but I've got to be honest, I've smashed it out the park tonight.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
Buzzing. :D
Well done Tim.
So my gay manager sent me an unsolicited, sexually led message on Facebook last night, which has freaked me out a little.
Weird as fuck.
Take the compliment, report him to HR. You won't be the first.
He'll gauge your reaction tomorrow and then decide to act accordingly.
There have been rumours I've heard about him sending things to other, not with the business anymore colleagues. There's a reason his nickname is 'Snapchat'. This time its been done on Facebook though so screenshot done.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
Nice one. It’s not particularly about your opinion on it because I think you’re a pretty strong personality but whatever hole you stick it in, hitting on your employees is proper wrongun stuff.
I would have thought he has a screw very loose if he's doing that to people under him at work who he knows to be straight.
To put context to it:
There's another bloke, about 50, on our team. Openly gay, genuinely lovely, a good laugh etc. We were talking about how/when he came out the other day, and I mentioned my experience, as ya all know, with trans when younger and how after that it wasn't my bag, but I tried it out. The manager did overhear this so my guess is he's gone full lol in his head and gone gung-ho, despite knowing I'm straight and been with my missus for over a year.
All the guys he's allegedly done it to in the past have been both straight and in relationships, however.
Even if you were of the same orientation as him, a senior approaching someone below them at work like that is an HR issue.
1) Straight men swing tooQuote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
2) The sentence should stop after the world 'work'.
He should be sacked.
Time to negotiate a massive payout :drool:
Or thumb it in, either way you're onto a winner
Yeah, I was commenting on his mental state rather than his professionalism, which is a fairly open and shut case.
I've been covering at various hospitals recently and while at one of them met this tall brunette who I was immediately smitten by.
At the time it was unclear if I was going to be staying at said facility so I didn't give it a go because of the old rule "never shit where you eat", but once it was obvious I was going back to my old facility I never actually saw her again.
So I thought about doing a half court shot on facebook to see if I could climb aboard this fuckin amazon goddess but decided against it because I didn't want to become a meme if I missed and ever had to come back.
LONG STORY SHORT, looks like I'm gonna be coming to that facility full time, so I'm pretty fucking pleased I didn't give it a shot because that could've ended poorly either way.
The worse she can say is no. Give it a go.
Update on sex pest manager:
I raised it. Three others he's done it to said I could give their names, so I did. They told me they're taking it seriously, and will keep me updated.
Five days later (we're open 7 days a week) - Those who came forward with me have now decided to not actually say owt when questioned, and as I gave their names on their okay, makes me seem like a bit of a bullshitter. Work's done fuck all so far apart from make me switch teams (which hasn't happened yet but apparently will, he's still my manager and I'm still sat a couple of seats over from him).
Think I'm looking elsewhere now, absolute joke.
Escalate it further. You have evidence.
They've got until Friday to actually do something, if they don't I will be.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I’ve applied for another job, that was advertised as INTERNAL ONLY so at least there’s less people to be better than. It would be for £500 a month more. Sign me up!
Also did I mention I’m 99% sure I might one day go to a meeting with @DC? :baz:
If you had a fanny he'd have been sacked within the hour.
Release it publicly if they fail to do anything.
Aye that's my argument and I basically said the same to them when I raised it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
What did the others say when you confronted them about selling you out?
I'll find that out tomorrow as only found out once I'd left work. Gonna be fun :DQuote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
There’s a new person at work to “do admin.”
What?
Besides, I don’t trust anyone to do a job better than me. I’d rather put aside 5 minutes to book my own room/ticket/whatever or process my own invoice than spend undoubtedly longer explaining how to do it and then fixing it when it’s done incorrectly.
'I don't trust anyone to do a better job than me' sounds unnecessarily ballsy when it turns out you're talking about booking a hotel room.
*meeting room
Well yeah I mean I trust the surgeon made a better job of my circumcision than I could have ever managed, but why would I waste time creating more work for myself, just to give the new person something to do?
If it's easier / quicker for you to do it will anybody even notice or care if you're doing it for yourself?
Someone just noticed I’d processed two invoices. “Oh Lucy could have done that.” Sure. She couldn’t though, unless I spent 10 mins explaining the process to her. Besides, it’s part of my job.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Side note: it’s one of the few parts of my job I’ve not had taken off me, so I think I’m just being cranky and protective over menial tasks because I need to chat to Yevrah.
So they want to pay you the same amount to do less.
Baz if you like doing your own pointless admin and menial tasks that take up the majority of your life, you could always go into teaching.
We're getting an admin at my place because we're all getting the work piled on. It's going to be a life saver.
I got brought in as a temp to do admin at a small office to lessen the workload a few years ago and spent my 9 months there doing about 20 minutes of work a day and spending the rest on here, pretty much.
Working my 7th straight day today and tomorrow is Monday, and can't get one ounce of help off anyone. If I hadn't the wife to think about I'd be about ten minutes away from walking.
lol someone has been suspended at work for fiddling their flex-time. Seeing as everybody does it, and seeing as nobody usually cares, you can only imagine the lengths they were going to to take the piss.
One of my mates just started a job with the government and was telling me about their flexitime, and how there are always meant to be x number of people in their office on a Saturday but in practice you just build up enough hours to write the shift off.
There is something about only being able to have so many 'flexi-days' off per four week period, but I don't think we bother enforcing that either. It's probably going to end up causing a bit of a stink, since there are people who will clock in and out on time but have however many breaks that don't get factored in, which again makes us think it must have been some serious piss-taking for them to have moved on it.
Is it liable to cause the sort of fuss where they'll start being stricter on everybody or just "Don't be like that dickhead, okay?"
They probably won't say anything, which is another lol aspect of it, because the unit itself barely follows any rules.
I could do with some time off. Had my first suicide call and the whole experience shook me to my core. Not least because the procedures we're supposed to have were put on the backburner.
See, we used to get rotas for who to pass these calls on to. Our overlords haven't given them out in months. So I had to gently close the call out (whilst she was... by the sounds of it, already taking an overdose) and then immediately get to work. This involved asking the substitute TL what the fuck to do before he left inside five minutes. He came back with a name he got from the proper TL who was on leave. This person did not answer their phone :moop:
So we grabbed an old rota from January and grabbed a name out of the hat. Rang her up, asked who was on the rota this week and then I made the call to her.
As far as I know, the claimant's not been called back. I'm absolutely done in and fed up. I don't care how rare those calls are, they fucking stay with you. :|
Some of my friends did 101 calls in Vodafone and although they're obviously not the fucking outlet for that those sort of calls would occasionally come through.
They'd been given about as much training as you'd expect.
It's my last ever week at rugby after 3 years and for 3 days this week I've been, quite literally, sent to Coventry.
Annoying I'm missing valuable time to have emotional farewells with my wonderful customers but I got to go to the quality noodle bar for dinner so it evens out.
It's fight or flight shit but it pisses me off how our main site doesn't keep us in the loop. It was an absolute shitshow trying to find out who was on that duty. It's how quick the call turned that was the worst.
And it's only fucking Tuesday.
Are you staying with the same bank when moving to Norwich?Quote:
Originally Posted by igor_balis
Aye, seemed by far the easiest way to facilitate the move.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
You should learn to code. :)
@Shindig what is it you do again? Sorry I'm sure probably postd a few times before.
I work for the government dealing with disability benefits. Most of the time, it's not a phone job, except when it is.
Christ, I knew it was something along those lines but not that specifically. Must be bloody bleak. Considering that I'm happy to almost entirely exonerate you for the 6 months or so you kept calling me a cunt.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
I dunno, I'm really careless and illogical but good at interacting with people so I feel like it would be pretty much the opposite of a job that would best suit my skills.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
I'd say you'd hear some chancing wasters in that job too.
I feel like it would be bleak for both reasons. Similar at our place, ish.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
I rarely needed to ring customers during my bank days. The only ones that got under my skin were the ones who thought they knew your job better. In the current work, I don't tend to get many shit phone calls but they always carry the risk. Usually it just manifests in someone wanting to vent.
So I've come to said facility full time and have been back here about a week. Didn't see her literally one time so I assumed she moved onto a different facility given her title.Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
Then today I was walking passed the little closet where they put a computer in to do online modules and there she was :wub:
I would never ask out a co-worker/peer/girl at my job but I'd still like to imagine doing scandalous things like holding her hand and going on a nice walk on the beach :wub:
Turns out from next month I'll be getting a payrise of about 7 or 8 percent that it sounds like I should have known I was getting but was apparently not paying attention at some point and was completely oblivious.
Not bad given I'm nearly a year in here and still feel like I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I guess this is just me reaping the rich rewards of finally making it to #TeamEngineer.
Sales conference today in one of those country hotels that exist solely for that purpose. For some reason, for the two hour lunch they decided to seat me with 6 Chinese people and an Indonesian. The former kept to themselves, but the latter told me at length just how shit his country is. It sounds like a 'best of' of shit dictatorships lumped into one sprawling mess of an archipelago.
Rewards? I’m in the wrong section.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
2.75% to look forward to soon. Better than improvement on 2% last time at least.
I had to tell a kid to wash his hands at lunch as he'd covered them in about 200g of butter and was trying to get it on other people. Took five minutes of asking the same thing, over and over. Always good to have those moments that really make you appreciate working with young people.
I had to explain to a kid today that having red pen on his hands, that he had put on himself, wasn’t the same as bleeding and that he didn’t, in fact, need to go to the hospital. Little idiots! :lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by mo
Guys so today I went to go make a cup of coffee in the breakroom which is directly adjacent to the little computer closet where she's doing those little classes I mentioned before right...Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
so the coffee thing was empty and made a loud like "ahhh i'm out of coffee" noise (cause it's one of those industrial size ones with like a pump) and I, mumbling to myself, was all "oh no oh God why" and all of a sudden she like loudly laughed from said closet.
Me, not being a creep, decided to keep minding my own business and assume she was laughing at something on her computer, but then she said "Oh that's the worst thing ever", and I turned around fake surprised like someone was noticing my antics and said "oh what being out of coffee??" and she's like oh yea and i was all "Oh deffff top 5 at least aha"
Then proceeded to make a new pot of coffee and offer her a cup to which she politely declined but
IDK fam it seemed kinda like way out of the way to me!
There may be hope just yet. I may have to throw out my old rules for this one, lads.
There's a distinct whiff of pens and donuts about all this.
Just propose now m8.
what dis meansQuote:
Originally Posted by John
I've thought about it :wub:Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Couple of new girls starting working at the work recently. Both attractive.
I’m going to get sacked for being inappropriate. :(
G’wan lads. :cool:
The promotion long list closes tomorrow and then I should know whether I've not got it by December. Fingers crossed because it should lead to a good payrise.
Going to start stealing a pen a day to sell on eBay when it all goes wrong. Smart.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Looks like we’re finally moving offices (after the person who robbed the desk I wanted in the current office said ‘it’s only for 3 weeks’ nearly four months ago. :moop:
To avoid disappointment I made a point of scoping out the new one, drew up a table plan and assigned everyone seats under the guise of ‘people who work together on stuff’ but it’s really I’m sat with people I like and I’m out the way in a corner so nobody can see me on TTH/Reddit. Sent it to the PA of the big director hoping it just gets circulated as ‘this is where everyone is sitting’ but really I’ll probably get told off for wasting time drawing it, it’ll be a free-for-all and I’ll be sit with people I don’t want to sit with and my screen in full view to everyone, just like it is now. :moop:
Hi Baz coworkers.
:D He's going to think you're a right jumped up little shitQuote:
Originally Posted by Baz
It’s okay, I’ve a job interview for a different department on 1st November. :)
Anyone know how to do text boxes on PDF?
https://i.imgur.com/lMJ4mjr.png
I make all my stuff in inDesign and can't find this functionality.
You could screen shot it, move it to like Paint 3D, text into it, then save it and reformat it back to pdf
But that's just some shit I would do because my work computer is very limited and annoying.
Yeah that’s a dogshit idea to keep quality. It would be mad pixels. I learnt how to do it in inDesign.
Lol so I managed to increase my wage by 50%, not quite the doubling I'd hoped for. Still working on it, though.
You're not wrong but to be fair the example you've provided doesn't look like it needs (whatever equivalent measurement insinuates a good pixel ratio).Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
Hence why I'm remaking it.Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
I've been offered voluntary redundancy at work and I'm taking it. All signed off and leave on 20th Dec. Number's way too good to turn down. Not ruling out going abroad. Do we still have a few expats on here? I'd probably be looking at management of processes/people of anything up to 100 people, but am flexible. Any advice on best places to look? Presuming there are websites which cater for this?
Works Christmas Do has been "planned" since January (let's go get drunk all day in Liverpool on December 13th) but now the tee-total god-botherer in the team has declared it as Christmas jumper day and is trying to find somewhere to go for "lunch."
I've politely explained I'll be in Liverpool from 12:30 onwards with the colleagues I like, getting obliterated, and she's welcome to join us.
:mad:
Also this went south, FAST.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Double :mad:
What happened?
Went for an assessment today, with a follow-up interview on Friday. They may as well cancel the interview now. :moop:
First of all, when I saw the job advertised (internal only!) I read it and thought it sounded a lot like the job one of my mates at work does, and something I’d be really interested in. Plus it was quite a significant pay rise. When my initial application was successful, I asked my mate if he had any advice. He rang me to say he’s also going for the job. Great! :cab: Turns out he isn’t on as much money as I presumed, so this new job would also be a step up for him. He also said it was bad timing because someone else has told him another post is about to become available and it’s probably as good as his if he applies for it. Problem is, the role isn’t 100% gonna come up, so he didn’t wanna sit around and wait only for it not to come up and miss out on this job I’m going for in the process.
Anyway, we went to the assessment today along with some woman who he knew cos he knows everyone. I was out my depth, to be honest.
Actually, let me tell you more about my mate from work who’s going for this job. He’s about 50 and for most of his life has considered himself an “artist.” He started his own business in the 80s or 90s selling his own artwork, usually painted onto old furniture or bits of wood he salvaged. Since then he’s done a lot of spoken word gigs and has a fairly big following for his poetry. He also makes really weird music with his mates that I recommended to @igor_balis once. He doesn’t sound like it, but he is a really funny guy and going for a drink with him is always entertaining. He’s great. But remember all this about him, okay?
Right, first part of the assessment was a spreadsheet with numbers on. We had to make a line graph to show these figures, then project the data for the rest of the year and also plot this on the same graph. Boring job stuff. My graph looked mega – not gonna lie – but I didn’t know what I was doing for the projection part. I use excel for accounting purposes mostly, in my current role, whereas my mate does exactly what was being asked on the assessment in his current job. The job is basically his, only somehow for more money. If he doesn’t get the job, it’d be very sus.
But forgetting how good he is at interpreting datasets and presenting information, because the second part of the assessment is where things got weird: write 400 words about this painting. My mate has since informed me it’s Guernica by Picasso. Of course he knew the name of it. Of course a job assessment about looking at data included a section on writing a critique of a goddamn painting. I mean, why wouldn’t it? :rolleyes:
So not only is my mate perfect for the job, based off the job description, but the seemingly complete curveball of an assessment is even more up his street. :wtf:
At the very least, I guess his current post will become vacant and I can apply for that. And probably fail to get it because I forgot how to do rudimentary trend calculations I probably learned when I was 13 and haven’t used since then. Curses.
Also one question on the first part was something like ‘explain why there may have been a decrease this year?’ and I’m staring at my graph that’s basically
thinking DECREASED? Ehhhh… so just wrote two lines of made up stuff explaining what may have caused a decrease, despite my projections showing a definite increase. :lol: Couldn’t have messed it up more, tbh.
And then for the painting thing I just described how loads of people are scrambling around in a small room, screaming and stuff cos flames are beating at the door and they’re all gonna die. And then they all died.
Giz that job then? :baz:
First the seating plan, now this. I'd hand in your notice if I were you.
Don’t even get me started. I’ve ended up with the WORST POSSIBLE SEAT. :moop:Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
Instead of the Guernica task, they probably asked him to design a seating plan.
"How did your interview go?"
*presents 11 paragraph analysis complete with graph*
and I'm gonna go back and read it, too. Pathetic.
I looked at the graph.
Wouldn't the answer have been something like "Based solely on the data from year prior had we continued our downward trend from 2017 to 2018 we would've experienced a loss, but if patterns continued over the period of data available we potentially should see an uptick from year prior to date for the year of 2019 given the up and down nature of the data on file." but worded in better, less remedial terms?
Though Baz I'd imagine your interpretation of the painting would win you points in the data world. If I were hiring someone to create graphs and numbers I'd want someone who sticks strictly to what's in front of them and not try to interpret things that aren't actually there?
Or maybe it's the opposite, and they need someone creative to push out graphs and data that reflect what they want them to reflect in creative ways.
I'm actually pretty intrigued with the entire art thing in the interview that's kinda wild.
What do you do Baz?
Annoy everyone else in the office by the sound of it.
The lack of labels pissed me off.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Process invoices, mostly.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
The actual one had labels. This was a rushed reconstruction.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
Along with an extra large portion of fuck all.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Had a disciplinary today with someone who's been at the company even longer than me. Gave them a copywriting task to do that was due today, and I was given a 30% completed document with a bunch of excuses about it taking longer then they expected - and they needed more time.
What they didn't realise was that it was a Google Doc, so I could see the entire edit history since the document inception, including the two days it wasn't touched at all. I was really pissed off going into it, but seeing them stumble over their words when I showed my hand almost made me laugh out loud.
There's something very odd going on in our office this week. The structure in our department is this:
Sales director
Sales manager (Russian)
Slightly more junior sales manager (Indian)
3 sales execs, one of whom is me
The director has an office away from the rest of us. The Russian and the Indian have little offices just offset from the open plan area where the rest of us sit.
On Monday night, as he was leaving the Russian (who was then off on leave for the rest of the week) went and shook hands with the Indian guy, which I found odd, as they are fairly close colleagues as you would expect, speak every day and don't normally go around shaking hands with each other.
Next, some random person from the warehouse is walking past his office and says jovially to the Indian guy 'Make sure you come back soon xxx, it won't be the same without you.' He laughs, and says something back to her which I can't really hear but includes the phrase 'starting on the 1st'.
Obviously both these incidents have made me think that the Indian guy is offski at the end of this week, but he hasn't told us so, nor has anyone else, and given that we all work together on things every day, and he is very good at his job, and has been here for 7 years, I would find it highly unusual if he was just off and nothing was made of it. I haven't got round to asking my other colleagues about it as we're all going pretty hard on our own work most of the day.
Then this afternoon, I was in the kitchen and in walks the Indian guy. Normally the kitchen is where any such secrets would be broken, as you're away from everyone else's earshot. He walks in, says how are you, I say great how are you, and he just starts going on about what a great day he's had, cracked some big deal in Mongolia and loads of orders have come in.
What's the betting on this? I reckon he's off and management have for some reason asked him to keep it hush hush until the bitter end, although that wouldn't explain how a random warehouse person seemingly knew about it. If he isn't off, why is the Russian going and shaking hands with him when he would otherwise see him on Monday? It's all very odd.
Sex change.
Throw a :sherlock: in there.
Do people not shake hands over there? Seems like a pretty common thing to do.
It is, but not on a daily basis with someone you work with.
I would feel absolutely ridiculous shaking hands with a coworker in the middle of the day. The only time that happens is if they've announced a big event (marriage/child) or it's their last day.
Not the middle of the day, as he was leaving. Common thing to do in Mexico, but who knows what you weirdos might or might not do.
Shaking hands with a co-worker every day? Yeah, we're the weirdos. :uhoh:
If he was leaving the job then fine but if someone is going around looking handshakes because they're going home for the day then they need a good slap so it only happens the once.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
I understand that the French go around shaking hands with all their co-workers at the start and end of each day, but no, it isn't done here.
I’ve met some Poles that go for that craic too. You can gauge how long they’re here based on whether they still do it or not.
A few years ago we had a Romanian that did it at the start of every day, shaking hands with everyone in the office. After about a fortnight he stopped.
Being in the French part of Switzerland I do the handshake/kisses thing but only outside work. However, I've worked in mostly International places.
We have a family friend who is notionally English but married a Frenchwoman and kind of 'became' French, the story goes that when he worked in London after 20 years in France he came in on the first day, shook everyone's hands, they all stood up and said nice to meet you. In second day, goes around, shakes everyone's hands, everyone's like erm... OK, I guess. Third day, eyebrows raised. Fourth day, listen, old chap, we need to have a little talk about this.
My time in my new branch has been absolutely the same as at my previous one. Absolutely nailing the customer interaction stuff, to the extent that I've overheard my new manager say a few times to my colleagues how shit hot I am, and even asked someone to keep an eye on how I talk to customers and see if they can learn anything from it (somehow this hasn't caused my new colleagues to massively resent me, thank christ). Similarly I'm absolutely shitting the bed on everything procedural and practical. My till was a GRAND short on Monday, to the extent that it had to be shut for 3 hours while my manager and AM tried to find it.
AM was going through all my transactions and asking my colleague if she recognised any of the names, as a last resort to see if anything seemed out of character.
AM: "do you know Miss X, [insert my colleague's name]?"
Me: "oh! I remember serving her, deposited 1400 quid into her account"
AM: "...Igor, the receipt says 2400..."
Me "...shit."
We even have a box that comes up that gets you to manually input exactly what notes were paid in, to avoid fuck-ups like that, and I'd still managed to input that she'd paid in 2 grand in twenties, when it was only 1 grand. Fucking hell. Management's policy in this branch is to get all of us cashier plebs to do all the different jobs so everyone can do a bit of everything, but I think they might make an exception and keep me the fuck away from the tills.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
My man got sacked. Gutted.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Was he shit at his job and that was just a reason to get rid?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
In Mexico it was easy. Shake all men's hands, kiss all women's cheeks. Since I moved over here I never know what to do, the whole thing is weird as fuck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
He was more pointless than shit, but you can't just go around sacking people for that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
My boss invited us for a drink last night and was half cryptic/half coherent on the future of our wider team and what appeared to be a "do you fancy joining me elsewhere" spiel. Probably would tbh if the pay improved and it was with the other guys.
Managed to get on a conference as well in Amsterdam for a week in December which is cool.
The figures were cumulative and I didn't realise. :cab: So I added up all four quarters, instead of just taking the figure from Q4. :face:Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Job interview didn't feel like a complete waste of time, even though all three of us knew it was. Ah well, find out before 4.
They were dipping into the reserve list from the last application process today to replace sack man, and the best reserve was discarded for 1) 'having a good degree' (meaning she would be gone in a year from the crappy position); and 2) being too good looking. No wonder it took me ages to find something.
Sounds about right.
You are just way too sexy.
Did her CV have a photo on? :cab:
She brought her face to the interview.
Didn't get that job. :violin:
Handshakegate has taken a curious turn. Both of them are back in the office and nothing has happened... except today we seem to have randomly hired a new starter in the department, and there isn't a desk for him so he's been sent into the warehouse for a week to 'learn the ropes' (we all did this but only for 1 or 2 days).
Maybe someone is going to get the bullet.
Got to work Christmas day. Boooooo.
I'm on call Christmas day and Boxing day (and then that weekend) but apparently in 9 years they've had one call over that period and I'll be getting the better part of £400 for it even if I don't take a call.
Also my sister's in-laws are really annoying so if they start to hack me off I'll just pretend I've got a call and go and get some peace for half an hour.
That's Halloween.
EDIT: Out of the way.
You would think there would be enough Asian in a hospital to not need white people in on Christmas Day. Unless you have to keep an eye on them.
Bro what
:roflol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Lots of people in the medical profession are Asian English people, who don’t celebrate Christmas.Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
IME even the ones who are of a religion which doesn't celebrate Christmas, they still mostly kinda do celebrate Christmas.
Don't worry, he means the brown ones.Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
New office sucks. My seat is dreadful and it’s stiflingly hot.
Only saving grace is it’s a pokestop on Pokemon Go.
Also the stupid fat lesbian who i moaned about stealing my seat in the last office, has stolen someone else’s seat in the new place. I loudly told everyone it’s because all she does is go on the internet all day and doesn’t want anyone to see her screen.
Soooo literally what you wanted it for? Respek.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Donned.
So the lad that left for Japan on sabbatical has now been given the boot. You can't really ask for an extension twice when you've married a lass over there, really. He's also changed his name to something Japanese which just makes me think this is all very suspicious.
King long dong?
How brexity is Southampton?
You'd be lynched within a week.
Grand, I'll only be 2 nights.
Giggles is off to Peppa Pig world. :cool:
Well now I am.
We'll need footage of you turning up with your bib and two pronged fork.
He's got one of those in the back of his van.
I'll have the van and all, 200 miles down from Fishguard. If it's really dodge I'll make arrangements and fly though.
.
SvN let's all meet.
Okay, the lad that left for Japan has no photos of his wedding to share because, "It's not the done thing over here." Definite nonce.
Did you immediately, as I did, google Japanese weddings and ask many, many questions?
Cause shiiiiit.
Yes. Yes, I did. In other news, Customer services want to borrow some of us because Monday's their busiest day of the week. Guess what our busiest day of the week is?
It’s 500 notes for the boat for a van. I’m going to have to fly now :nono:
Lol my Dec 23rd pay packet comes with a 11K commission. :)
5.5k.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Yes after tax it may be even less.
This spending freeze is taking the piss now. "Guys, we can't spend frivolously on the bags we need for deliveries. By the way, there's money in the rewards kitty to spend and there's a Christmas event coming up! Oh, we shut the canteen because it wasn't viable but here's a sandwich van!"
I escaped Barrow to live my own professional dream of sitting on my arse in a office in Manchester, no more shift work, massive flexibility and no weekends. It's a spreadsheet marathon but better than speaking to the general public.
Barrow's loss is the Pacer train's gain.
There’s so much angel delight offshore. It’s fucking brilliant.
:drool:
Butterscotch or gtfo.
Lofty :cool:
I'm currently bracing myself for a month of hell. Christmas parties. :moop:
People slate the pacers but their reliability is top notch, it's just the comfort that is lacking. Although if you've ever sat across from a bustier passenger on one you soon appreciate the merits.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Yeah, you get people moaning like fuck about them every week on the local news back home, as if their twenty minutes from Doncaster to Wankton justifies doubling ticket prices for a fleet of new toys.
Someone in the office has decided to start eating oranges all the time. It smells fucking rank.
Oranges smell nice.
Oh and I bet they’re not oranges.
Clementines, Oranges. Shame foul smelling shite.
:cab:
[CAPS]Who the fuck doesn't like the smell of oranges?! God I hate this fucking guy![/CAPS]
Got bumped from my helicopter today so stuck offshore another night.
Platform went into meltdown in that time also. Nightmare.
People who fuckin whistle should be drug out into the street and shot with several nerf guns.
I'm sorry, how should they be taken to the street?
Under a heavy dose of Lemsip.
:D
This reminds me of the time I thought "warsh" was a word because my country ass family used to say they were going to "warsh" the dishes and "warsh" the clothes and "warsh" the car.
Are your country ass family hostile Scots?
Just picked up the post at work. Two envelopes were identical and both had been redirected from some mail place - the original envelopes they'd been sent in were inside and they'd been intended for two of the top-boys. Anyway, someone had scrawled the name of my department on them, hence me getting them. They contained about 20 pages of printed "questionable" tweets (about 3 per page) of someone I work with quite a lot, who is quite high up.
I've just given them to the director.
Writing that as if you weren't the source, gutsy.
Grats on your promotion.
Baz really thrives off being the office snitch and it's kinda disgusting.
Knowledge is power tbf.
So either Baz is the one who is stitching up his co-worker or everyone in the office knows for a fact Baz will go straight to the feds and has "accidentally" sent it to him as to not have a paper trail back to them.
In both scenario Baz is more than excited to comply.
Is this all because you didn't get the chair you wanted or have you always been this way?
This is the content for my PRESENTATION to the sales team on Wed:
1) Tag team presentation by IAM and BDM [both must play a part]
2) Mandatory Info
a) Performance Last Month
i) Number of Hosted Seats
ii) Number of Ethernet
iii) Track both of these against your forecast for that month
b) Performance to target FY to date for both Hosted and Ethernet
c) Your Conversion Rate FY to date
d) Forecast for the Rolling 3 months
i) Seats forecast in current month and for the rolling 3 months [show forecast for each of the 3 months]
ii) Ethernet forecast in current month and for the rolling 3 months [show forecast for each of the 3 months]
e) Partner Performance
i) FY to date Hosted Seats Won by Partner
ii) FY to date Ethernet Won by Partner
iii) FY to date Opportunities per Partner
3) Bonus Info
a) Performance
i) One off and Recurring Revenues for each month of FY to date
ii) Total One off and Recurring Revenues for FY to date
iii) Lost Seats and Ethernet opportunities last month
iv) Total qty of lost seats and Lost Ethernet FY to date
b) Partner
i) FY to date Opportunities won / lost / open by Partner
ii) FY to date Total One Off revenues by Partner
iii) FY to date Total Recurring revenues by Partner
PMSL. Surely all of this should be at hand in a proper sales platform? Fucking shite our systems are.
That sounds absolutely dreadful.
Stay strong when you get to 'E'.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Luckily I think he already has a powerpoint template for that if i recall.
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
I hate my desk soooo much it’s not even funny. Literally ever other desk is better positioned.
Do you not stop and think MAN... there MUST be a reason I was given the worst possible desk possible... despite the fact I wrote a very specific seating plan !
If Baz is anything like I think he is, he'd be great to work with. Nothing passes the time like chatting shit. Plus, he'd do most of the talking so you'd never get called up for it.
A more socially accepted version of Gareth from The Office is how I imagine Baz in work.
Got a promotion. Woo.
Hell ya phonics.
Can I borrow a tenner?
I got sent home today for calling out the sous chef. :moop: In the politest manner possible I simply told him that if he's going to be a dickhead then just shut the fuck up and cook some food. He decided to throw his toys out the pram and ensure it was a difficult service then boss texts me telling me to take evening off.
Man City match it is. :cool:
Was "shut the fuck up and cook some food" how you phrased it to him or the paraphrased version you're telling us? Just in case you need clarification for the future of what "politest possible manner" means.
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
Word for word tbh. I'm not even sure what actually happened. I covered a shift last night as someone had to go home and at some point he mentioned how I was pissing him off, at first I thought he was joking but then I realised he was being serious so I just kept quiet for remainder of the shift. This morning he completely blanked me then started throwing petty preppy shit at me, I didn't bite, I merely peeled and scored a shit load of sprouts and cracked on.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Then he carried on. And on. And on. So I told him to if he wants to be a dickhead then to shut the fuck up and just cook some food. We actually get on better than any other pairing in the kitchen so I'm a little bewildered to be honest but fuck it.
:sorry:
On the lookout for a new job. Even looked through an advert for a private school earlier, but I'm not quite desperate enough to compromise my ideals just yet.
Imagine the little cretins in one of those. And the parents :sick:
Fuck private schools.
Having been through one, I'm pretty sure private school teaching is a one way ticket to acceptably-paid misery. There always seemed to be something, you know, wrong with them all.
The best ones were the handful of serious academic sorts who were probably a bit better than school level, had other things in their lives, and didn't give a fuck.
As opposed to poorly paid misery in the public sector.
I reckon, knowing a couple of state school teachers these days as well as reading mo's experiences on here, that even though they get hammered into the ground for fuck all reward, their souls and dignity remain intact. I'm not sure the bloke who used to teach me Economics, spent every day of every holiday in 'Thighland' as he called the south east Asian kingdom, and then eventually moved to teach at the UAE branch of Repton School could say that.
That probably sounds really patronising as per from me, but you know what I'm getting at.
Every holiday in Thailand?
Definite nonce.
I really hope there is a UAE branch of Repton School (is it not College)?
Seems not.
Played them at hockey once, on a fucking grass pitch, the backwards northern fuckers.
Radley is the college, I mix them up too. And yes there is: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Repton_School_Dubai
I thought Radley was a bag manufacturer.
Dignity. That's a stretch.
How many days of annual leave does everyone get?
I get 25, plus 4 floating bank holidays. I can carryover 5 from the previous year. I work a 9 day fortnight so I get every second Friday off AND I can use salary sacrifice to buy another TEN. Seems mental.
Relative cost of the extra day of leave isn’t that bad either... works out about 14 quid a month after tax per month per extra day.
I’m not even sure, 26 or something but I work up that many hours to take off that I never need to take most of them and just get paid for them in the December pay.
25. I can carry 5 from the previous year but can buy as much as 10.
I’m debating buying ten and just not working Fridays.
Career limiting perhaps?
17 plus three at Christmas. In this respect even the Koreans have the edge over my current mob, run, it must be said, by an 80 year old Israeli. People who built their business empire 50 years ago and likely fled the Holocaust as young children give no fucks for time off.
24 but you rarely get to use them when you want them and the company doesn't allow you to carry them over which I find a bit rich given the reason you can't take them when you want to is due to staffing issues. I lost 5 days when October ended and now you've got to accrue them again hence why I can't have two weeks off end of January to go away.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
In short, meh.
Is that excluding bank holidays?Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Yes. It's 20 all in all (the legal minimum) but 3 of them are fixed so we have 17 to deploy ourselves.
I get 20 days holidays, 4 floating days of my choice and then 6 fixed company days off over the year. Make out pretty well compared to a lot of people in the US.
I get 30 with a mandatory 2 week stint. I've had 60 this year because I skirted the rules as a temp and they'd get sued into oblivion if they tried to take it away from me.
I'm currently on 20 plus 8 or 9 bank holidays plus three extras the company just gives specifically for use around Christmas and new year. Next year I'll get an extra 2 for length of service, and if I'm still here the year after that it'll be 25 before the extras.
Okay, mine's more like 30-ish with the bank holidays. If I get to ten years, I'll have an extra day.
23 plus the 8 bank holidays. After 1 year, you get an extra" duvet day", which allows you to call in on the morning one day per year and tell us you're not coming in. The only caveat is you're not approaching a deadline and don't have any meetings scheduled that day.
My mum works at one of the poshest schools in the country and the teachers there are pretty sound though will randomly turn up at houses (yeah I know) with a load of their mates and expect to be fed dinner, despite the fact the catering is all subcontracted out and the firm running it has the strictest itemized budgets per student. Usually it means she either gets a bollocking from the school for not being accommodating or from the catering firm for going over budget. Her war stories have essentially convinced me that everything everywhere should be run in-house, efficiency my ass.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
I don't know if this is the same at state schools, but one time in upper sixth a few of us got invited up to the staff canteen, and... fucking hell, it was like going from economy to first class.
27 I think + bank holidays (or days in lieu if I have to work one because I'm on-call or whatever). Because my jobs are 4 month rotations I have to take 9 days during each 4 month block or I lose them.
13 weeks :henn0rz:
I couldn't do your job for 12 days a year in fairness.
Our seating plan is out for next year. I am miles away from bother. Chuffed.
You’ll have to give some tips to Baz.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
Not much to say, to be honest. I get on with most of the people in the office and changing teams every year keeps it fresh.
I like that he actually tried to find advice to give.
:(
Fuck me. J-Corbz might be on to something.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
I get 25 + Bank Holidays and a bonus day over Christmas that they decide on (Usually Christmas Eve, but it's the day after Boxing Day this year), and thay still doesn't feel enough.
Although 17+3 is fuck all, it actually feels right within the context of the job, any less and the holiday cover would be a nightmare. I guess that means we are understaffed and the owner is a tight bastard.
28 plus bank holidays and then Christmas thrown in on top for nothing. Loving life.
Got called a ‘mong’ today. I swear to God the weeks running up to Christmas are the fucking worst.
You'd expect a head teacher to have a better vocabulary.
It’s easily my least favourite half term.Quote:
Originally Posted by mo
Understandable. We all have three months of dark misery behind us, and there is no end in sight.
:DQuote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I was trying to find a way to snide this in as some sort of job application feedback.
Just had my (late) mid year review and I'm getting a Christmas Brucey. :cool:
2nd best performance in the team and I've not even been here a year.
How much is the bonus?
To be confirmed. Won't get anywhere near the numbers posted in here. Couple of hundred probably.
I got £500 last year and since then have worked my arse off and seen our French sales rise by 102%, so if it isn't in four figures this year I'll do a proper diva flounce and smear Brie all over the walls.
The review/bonus/salary review is proper mob style at this company, you know it'll be in December but don't know when, and then Netanyahu will just randomly phone you up and summon you to his office. Terrifying stuff.
I mocked a FOCUS GROUP the Chairman was leading on YAMMER. Wasn't a direct dig at him, just a dig at the already failed focus group with a hint of comedy.
Anyway that was 2 weeks ago and now I've been told to go up to Inverness and bring all my company equipment, so presumably I'm about to get fired after 6 years of service for a sarcastic comment I made on a public forum. After my best month of making them an absolute fortune as well.
Not even a disciplinary or something, just a straight up firing?
I mean I know companies can use that sort of shit as grounds for gross misconduct or whatever if they want to but normally only if they already wanted rid of somebody I'd have thought, where it sounds like you've been doing well since your role was changed.
Yammer is a festering bag of shit.
If it was a disciplinary why bother asking me to bring all my stuff? And why disrupt all the big deals I'm working on? They are fully aware of the stuff I've got in my pipeline. So 2 weeks leave or whatever would just be insanity.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
They are all ex-military so this is probably seen as UNFORGIVABLE and is a case in point of cutting your nose to spite your face, egos etc. I want to walk in and say fucking ram your job you bunch of cunts but I'm kind of upset really especially just before Christmas. I have no car or phone or laptop or anything that's personal and it's already difficult enough for me as a single parent with all my outgoings for maintenance, mortgage etc.
This will kill me.
I left my job on Friday and went home. GM and I spoke about the incident with the sous chef and why he lashed out but truth be told, it's not my issue. I think I sort of used it as an excuse to leave if I'm honest. Friday I went into work at 9am, by midday I had told the head chef that that's it, I'm done. I went upstairs, packed my shit and an hour later I was on the NX returning to Wales.
I'm still going to stick with cooking because I genuinely enjoy it and I am getting better all the time at it but I think some home comforts instead of a live in job is for the best. I also get to be back with Ellie so win/win. I plan on taking this month off then see what 2020 brings. Every year I find life gets easier to manage so I take things as they come. I don't think I'm ever going to be a settled individual but I'd rather be me now than the me of yesteryear.
Surely there’s a disciplinary procedure they have to follow. Have you prior warnings, improvement plans, etc?Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
They could well be trying to strong-arm you into taking it but unless it’s a total cowboy operation they are unlikely to be able to fire straight off like that without you flexing them for it. Engage a solicitor.
Dunno, they could probably find a string of OFFENCES (speeding on the tracker, christ I dunno, a whole host of little things) but no I've never had a prior talking to as it isn't that sort of company. I have really smashed one of my targets but I'm under performing on the other more so since having them increased as we haven't replaced a sales person that left. And our other 'new' sales person hasn't sold a fucking thing in 5 months of being here. So if they let me go they'd have two sales people basically.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Could be a public bravado thing to humiliate me and put me in my place, and give me due cause and concern. From a sales perspective though it's really really really easy to fire someone for not hitting target, as it's quite simple, you're either doing it or not. Whether that's the real reason or not is irrelevant really.
'Gross misconduct' covers a multitude of sins. I'd check and see how that stuff is covered in your contract.
Yeah, it sounds a bit mad.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Are you and the other sales guys paid the same before commission?
Myself and the other ex-engineer are paid £25,000 basic, but we get double commission.
The most experienced sales guy at our company (who has less target because he's a fucking snake cunt) is paid £31,000 (we think).
The most experienced sales guy in general (newest one, has same target as me and other ex-engineer) is paid probably upwards of £50,000 as a basic.
Hmm.
Is it today you've to go up?
No tomorrow for 11AM.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Oh, so 24 hours of stewing on it into the bargain as well.
Arseholes.
What was the post and what was your actual comment?
48, as it was sent to me yesterday, when I was on annual leave.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
I got fed up of suggesting things and being told 'it's on the roadmap' so I asked them to share this mystical roadmap, and queried if they were just adding things to it every time someone suggested something.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
You can't get the kick for that, surely.
It wasn't in response to the Chairman either, just a close friend/colleague who posted the roadmap reply.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I don't think it matters who it was to really. People should be allowed to ask questions, even if they are word in a passive aggressive way. All you've actually asked for is an update on the direction the company is taking. Unless you're working for Kim Jong-Un any kind of disciplinary would be a joke.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Looking forward to the 'lol was just PAT testing' response from Magic, while he secretly cries and has a conference call with his new missus to discuss the pros and cons of topping himself.
Morning AJ
Its time that we had a face to face meeting.
I want you in Inverness on Wednesday 11th December at 11am. I have checked your diary and its clear .Bring your equipment with you.
Dave
----------
It isn't PAT testing.
You're building a roadmap.
Where does your missus live, @Magic? I was amused by the coincidence ("coincidence"?) of the girl sat opposite me on the train talking to somebody saying they were "taking it too personally" and about "getting banned from Yammer."
I never fucking hear anything about Yammer and now twice in one day.
I never heard of Yammer before Magic said it today.
Is this like WebEx or Skype or some shit
No. It's basically Facebook but for businesses.
It’s a crock of shit that I avoid entirely.
No good can come of it.
If you’re going to get sacked, get sacked for smashing the receptionist over her desk or smacking the dirty bitch who stole your desk rather than a condescending comment on a shitty forum.
Tempted to apply for a new job at work. It’s also shit and similar to what I do currently, but it’s a promotion so more money. Unlikely to get it but id be stupid not to apply right?
Stop giving Baz advice, Foe.Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
Yer Maw more like.
Dundee. She has no idea this is going on.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Well now me slipping that laminated TTH card into her handbag when she wasn't looking just feels kinda weird.
That was me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
I'd email him and ask what he wants to chat about. Probably a bit late now if it's tomorrow morning though.
Isn't that LinkedIn?Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
LinkedIn is basically just generic Facebook now.
LinkedIn is more external facing as I understand it. People use it to find jobs, no? Yammer is literally Facebook, but limited to you and the people you work with. It's Internal only and used by organisations (or mine at least) as an opportunity to shove the company line down everyone's throat a few times a day.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
I've never had a LinkedIn account.
I'm due for a trial on Friday at a local brasserie but I'm so tempted to fuck it off and take the whole month to myself. The part that puts me off is I think January would be a shitty month to try and find a new job. I'm thinking I'll stay put in NW for a while now as although I like the live in positions, I do sort of miss the home comforts.
Well?Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Also intrigued.
Isn't it like 3pm over there ffs
Yeah but it was 4 hours ago he had his meeting. And we're sitting at our own jobs bored and impatient.
Well he's either still working or lying in a ditch somewhere.
Trying to find out which bus goes home?
Dude I'm right with you that's what I'm saying !Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
Oh I see. :D
I thought you were telling us to back up and give him some time.
Power of Positivity tells me MJ will come back with good news. :nodd:
'Good news, lads. I can sleep in tomorrow.'
@Ian man fuck no I want answers now now now!
Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead Please don't be dead
Should have slipped a phonics is a cunt into the middle of that.Quote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
I'm sure he read that from beyond the grave.
it came to mind tbf. Still sorry to @phonics for being the cunt in that situation tho.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
One of our students died last night, so today has had an odd, subdued atmosphere. He was a sixth former so most of them have been a wreck all day and eventually went home early. Students in lower years reportedly in floods of tears but unable to articulate why. Think I've mostly been in shock all day - he was in Y7 when I started at the school and although I didn't know him that well it still hits home. I don't really think of the children I teach as mortal; they're children, with long lives ahead of them.
What happened?
No idea. If anyone in school knows they're keeping it tightly under wraps. I wouldn't like to speculate.
Means that this year, all three secondaries in the town have lost students. One in a road accident on his bike, another murdered (you might have read about Ellie Gould) and now this lad. A rotten year for the young people and families affected.
Mo works in a school? :|
He’s a head of something (I don’t know how your secondary schools work).Quote:
Originally Posted by Bam
I really hope Magic is okay. Anyone got him on facebook or whatever to check in on him?
I’d suspect he still has a job (because a company can’t be that stupid) and he knows everyone is dying to know what happened.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Hopefully. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
I had intended to take the month off but some half-hearted searching has led to an informal interview on Friday for a place right on my door step. It's so easy to find work as a chef though so I'll take it with a pinch of salt. I'm always confident when I get the interviews, the gift of the gab ensures I get it nine times out of ten.
If I do then I might try stay in NW for the first time in many years. It's time to stamp down some roots, I feel.
No news on MJ?
Not happy with the level of interest when you told us all of that this morning?Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
:D So I did.
I looked and thought he was on the thread at 5 this evening but I don’t think that active users thing works properly anyway.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Fucks sake Bam you absolute whopper. That's why the 'nonce' comments (which, hilarious by the way everyone, loving your work) are funny.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bam
I'm just a bog standard classroom teacher. No 'head of' anything.
I don't want to tell you you how to do your job, mate, but I reckon half them sixth formers were just angling for the day off.
If your TV has taught me anything, sixth form is basically just one long day off.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
It was pretty great looking back. We got that EMA doss money for doing nothing as well. :lewis:
Our sixth form is more akin to a gulag. You've got to work pretty hard to bunk off.
we talking about 11-12 years olds?
16-17
Hot facebook chat gossip: MJ is fine.
Don’t be screenshotting private conversations and sharing them you letch.
That's my usual policy but I think it's alright considering the content, or lack thereof.
Yo. :D
Tell the pussy 'ole to get on here and spill.
I'm telling you, he's building a yellow brick roadmap.
Yo? Is MJ the 46th member of So Solid Crew?
Nah, you're thinking of Blazin' Squad.
https://www.thepoke.co.uk/wp-content...solid-crew.pngQuote:
Originally Posted by bruhnaldo
Never forget.
There's too many good ones in that list and a few pisstakes. EDIT: It's mostly pisstakes. Someone had a fun night on that edit.
I'm ok guys. I'm ok.
Yesterdays news m8.
Yo Magic, don't milk it. Details of why they were cunting you about or gtfo.
How's the roadmap?
Had my annual review and a 2% payrise (it sounds like everyone is receiving the same). Given they gave me only positive feedback in the review, the 17+3 holiday allowance, the fact I do significant legwork for them and that I now have a mortgage, I think that is no good and I need to be doing better. I shall cast the net out in the new year.
Do you enjoy the job? If so, give them chance to increase their offer before you hand your notice in.
If I actually receive a job offer elsewhere at a higher salary I'll give them the chance to better it. But in the context of the annual review, resistance is futile. They gave me a good hike last year but in hindsight I think that was because someone had just left and they didn't want to risk losing me as well.
The sales director is a good boss and knows my value, but in the review it's all about the 80 year old Israeli patriarch chairman, and the sales director just sits there like Smithers.
I was informed today that I got the job I went to on Friday. I didn't have to do a great deal other than a little bit of prep and answer a few questions.
The only downside if you can call it that is they don't need me over the festive period but I start on January 2nd. I'll use the next couple of weeks to relax then get back on it for the start of 2020. It probably couldn't have worked out much better and I'm pleased I get to stay in and around my hometown for the first time in a few years.
Happy Smiff.
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be promoted this year so upping the corporate title. Not sure what it means on the pay side but hopefully something reasonable considering I had a freeze last year.
I'm going to bring the tone down by informing you I spent the morning next to a massively hungover alcoholic. She had a carrier bag ready in case she needed to be sick into it. She felt the need to tell me that.
You mean FUNCTIONING alcoholic. I mean she brought her own carrier bag after all.
Functioning but not productive. I barely saw her for the first hour. And when she did turn up, all I got was the whiff of sick.
2% is actually a pay decrease. It's below inflation.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
I've been offered a job in Amsterdam, so it looks like I'll be moving there next year. Still got the financial stuff to sort out and relocation logistics, but I reckon I'm about 75% good to go. It's a lovely city and culturally loads going on. Pretty excited although it doesn't quite seem real yet.
I thought it was 1.75%. Either way, it's dogshit.
Just finished work for Christmas. Not back in until the 6th. :drool:
Ditto to this. Glorious.Quote:
Originally Posted by thommo
Pricks.
I finished last week. Back on the 13th.
Snap!Quote:
Originally Posted by thommo
Finished yesterday but I am back on the 2nd.
Emails have already stacked up but I just can’t be arsed checking.
Unsuccessfully interviewed for a promotion the other day.
To be honest I'm desperate to gtfo of here, but thought better to earn a bit more while I looked and figured it would look better on the CV if I'd managed to get beyond being a cashier in 4 years. Ah well. The job itself sounded pretty gash (expected to work ALL Saturdays, and the potential line manager is notorious for being SALES SALES SALES), and I suppose this means I'll be more motivated to actually find something else. Shame I still haven't got much of an idea what I want to do.
I'm on about 18.5, and now I actually have to pay rent, it isn't great. Even an entry level admin bitch job would probably be better.
I'm sure I've asked you this before, but how do banks of all places get away with paying people 18.5 for full time employment including weekend work?
The same way they get away with closing branches down because 'they cost too much'.
Got paid £7,500 after tax. That'll cover some of my December debt (£1000) and the rest is have fun money.
What are the plans big man?
£18,5 is madness.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Retail banking isn't that profitable (compared to wealth management or investment Banking) and usually has lower entry points.
And they're never short of takers, assuming they haven't automated or booted those jobs offshore. For reference, my back office jobs have been £10k (full time, 2009) and £16k (2014). That money goes further in the North-East, mind. I'd imagine branch and customer services land on less.
I started off on £16k in my first admin job, then £18k, Now £30k (plus expenses). I thought I'd be loaded when I took it but it barely makes ends meet really.
Aye, as soon as I get into houses, cars and kids, any spare money will vanish.
I was on £22K in my last position which is about £4-6K more a year than I got working in care. Bizarrely the position I start at the beginning of January beats that as I'll be on £24K. If I can learn enough and gain enough experience to make a sous chef then I think that's roughly £28K and then in years to come a head chef position if I continue being interested and capable. It's nice to earn decent money for a change (by my standards) but at the same time it is a little galling that you get paid more to cook food than you do taking care of people with challenging behaviours and complex minds.
I’ve gone from around 17k to with this promotion 70k over the last 4 years.
Pretty impressive to be fair. TTH's highest earner? I wonder who's the lowest and what region their from.
I'd imagine one of the older bastards like Yev will be on the most.
Yeah but factor in that my standard of living costs are 2-3x of the UK.
SvN must do pretty well.
My base is £61k, but I also take dividends that vary depending on how successful we were. This year I took £10k (which was wiped out by paying stamp duty on the new house), last year was £25k.
My pay won't increase for a good few years now, though.
I'm on 27.5k, which given my markets closed on £1.4 million of sales at a 46% margin this year I think represents a fairly shite deal (only my manager gets any kind of commission).
I can pay a mortgage on it and don't have an extravagant lifestyle, so meh. I am also going into full time cricket umpiring next year which will be a quiet extra 1.5k on the side, tax free, for basically standing in a field enjoying myself.
I’m in the 50’s but it’s Euros and it doesn’t go far here at all. The free car and all associated costs adds on a bit too.
Given I've made pay progression every year (met the targets I was set in order to move up a pay point) for the five and a bit years I've been teaching, I'm now on £35k, which is the top of the main pay scale for teachers outside London. If I want to move on further (to the Upper Pay Scale) I have to provide two years worth of evidence of my "wider contribution to school life", like running in-house training sessions.
Edit: Factor in child care after mortgage, bills etc and there's not a lot left over.
Im on a base of 60ishk but there's normally a pretty decent bonus, flexible allowances and some quality share schemes. I work in a pretty lucrative industry tbf (though less so that it used to be, if I start 2-3 years earlier I'd be loaded). Aberdeen is way cheaper to live in these days too.
Considering my platform churns out $2million of oil a day I don't feel too bad about that. My living expenses these days are basically council tax and tv sport subscription so it just doesn't matter too much.
I'm on £43k pro rata for next four month. Probably a bit more for the four months after that, and less for the final four months of the year.
Then I'll be locuming for 8 months and rolling in it.
I'm on £92k + up to 10% bonus, working in tech in London with around 10 years experience.
I live in one of the most expensive areas of the UK though.
Not sure mate. Going to take wean on holiday next year. Might get a TV that actually works and doesn't have a shadow on it. Need a new boiler. Some home improvements. Maybe some city breaks with the dating partner, but the wage disparity is real so...Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
I've been paid £43,000 this FY, with another 3 months to go. So worst I can get is £50,000.
Don’t get her used to too much if you’re in for the long haul.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
Ooft. :thbup:
Even living in an expensive area, that’s class. If your partner works as well, golden.
What’s most impressive is that he’s so humble you’d never know...
Are we doing highest earnings? :D
Don't forget (until June) I lived in the Bay Area
£19k. If I was on the DWP side of things, I'd probably be on an extra £5k. Otherwise, gaining £5k in 4 years has been a decent result. Largely due to that one year the union got lucky. I could push it to £20k if I really gave a shit about overtime. It's always on and it's all double-time.
TTH Financials would be a decent thread. We can see who was born with a silver spoon and who went the hard route.
Didn't Jimmy go to a private school?
TTH Sob Story.
That's the Play Your Heart Out thread, no?
I did.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
Someone in my year killed himself, so at least I'm one up on him.
It wasn't a stab, I just thought £27.5K is on the low scale for someone with an education is all and you live down south.
If we're giving me an xSalary at my age based on education and region then I'm well under it, but life is more complicated than that, and is also not a race.
Aren't you in your mid 30's? :cab:
Thirty-one, but like I said, not a race.
I'm just glad he's not having a dig.
Smiffy can’t help but be a tool, but his xTool is also quite high so it’s expected
And if Jimmy has a go back, he'll end up messaging the admins demanding that we help him.
Then he'll leave and come back as Sm1ff7, rather than just resume posting under his old account.
£40k. Down from £70k in 2017 though lel.
In the pocket that is.
How does that happen? Made redundant?Quote:
Originally Posted by dino
Different perceptions and all that. I hit 35 next month and I feel I have so much lost time to make up as in the grand scheme of things I've done fuck all compared to others I know my age. It doesn't help there's a huge gap of a few years whereby life got the better of me. I do feel like a failure sometimes but then I also think of my history and how I keep bouncing back and trying harder. I feel it's a race now because I don't think I have more than 20 years left. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Time to go chill for the remainder of the day though as I already know how this evening will pan out once the lynch mob emerge. Have a good evening all.
He's a professional gambler.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Starts of calling someone a failure for not earning more than they do, ends up declaring himself the victim for being called on it. Who do you support again Smiff?
You have to be able to take the pressure off yourself. If I sat around worrying that people I was at school with take home six times my wage I would be a wreck. I actually was a wreck from the ages of about 16-26 whilst beating myself up about the various reasons I did not fit in with many such people. Once you start viewing life on your own terms it becomes an awful lot easier.
Ah right. Wasn’t that Simon goon one too?Quote:
Originally Posted by John
Impressive money to be pulling all the same for something like that.
One of the most successful people I know was working minimum wage at John Lewis into his thirties. He's mid 40s now and recently sold his stake in a company for £9million.
Jimmy is absolutely spot on when he says it's not a race. Smiffy is just too thick to understand what that actually means.
Honestly you’re a lot better a person than 7 years ago or so, from my perspective at least. You used to be Lewis crossed with John in terms of personality but you seem now like someone who’d be easy to get along withQuote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
You unbelievable arsehole. You kicked off in this thread giving Jimmy grief about not earning more than he does because he went to private school, and now that someone has correctly called you on it, and correctly predicted exactly what you'd do, you're trying to claim victimhood and flouncing off for the night to prevent some imaginary dogpile. You do get more shit than most, but that's because you dish out more shit than most and it's nobody's problem but your own if you're too thick to know what you're doing. You're always claiming you don't want special treatment, but the minute someone calls you a twat you invoke your mental struggles and start bleating as though this whole board is nothing more than a support group that's failing in its duty of care to you. And the irony is you have been given more latitude than anyone else in the history of this board because there was clearly an underlying reason for all the dickery, but you're too big an entitled shithouse to realise it and no amount of help or leeway is ever enough.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
Just prior to your old account being banned you told us that you'd reported the board as a whole and the mods individually to the police, complete with screenshots, as well as reporting us to vBulletin for running on a less than legit version of the software at the time. Now I suspect you were full of shit and did none of that, but you never admitted as much and yet here you are, posting away with a clean slate and claiming to be hard done by. You can fuck right off with that.
Where have I called Jimmy a failure? Stop being silly.
Where did I call Jimmy a failure? I just naturally assumed a well educated individual living down south would be earning more than 27K.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
How odd that the general consensus is that I was attacking Floyd.
Yes, how odd that everyone apart from you sees it that way. I wonder what that means.
Yup. If I got worried about the chase for income, I'd be caning the overtime each week. All I want is to be comfortable and I've been comfy for the past six years.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
[QUOTE=John;371198blah blah.[/QUOTE]
You don't have chat some rubbish. You're the worst on here and have been for years. You're a sad bitter person but you've been like that for donkeys years. Strange post.
I understand that and I can see how it ends up being a form of self sabotage. I also think it's partly why I've got more of a handle on things. Most my brothers and sisters are so far ahead of where I am and so it's like even big steps for me over the years were viewed as nothing but to me they were. That's what I mean about being a race, I feel now I've got to grips with my mental state more that I need to make up for lost time.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Of course it's not about earnings as I'd rather earn little and be happy in what I do with a nice balce of work/personal life. I'd also never assume you were a wreck as you've always seemed on the ball to me.
I suppose it shows you don't know someone other than their username.
For the record, I don't think it was grief. I read it as Smiffy making a daft connection between public schooling and income. Daft, not malicious.
Well clearly it means I worded it poorly but as I said, I just assumed Jimmy was someone who's had his shit together for years. Like I said, it's nothing to do with what he earns so if it came across like that then I can only apologise to Jimmy as it wasn't intended that way.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
Not even that. I just assumed Jimmy was one of those who had a high level job, well educated and living down south. Kind of like Kiko minus the manc and private schooling.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
'Can you give us that name again, please, Mr Smith?'
'It's just "John", but if it helps he lives in Glasgow in real life.'
Yep, clearly nothing to do with what he earns.Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
John you can assume whatever you please. I know I didn't intend for it to come across as an attack. More tongue in cheek than anything but whatever.
Jimmy's had big employers (The Met, Korean Electronic Giant of Mystery, Tinker Tractors) but his roles have been relatively modest.
For what it's worth, I'm earning more than I ever have and I'm the most miserable I've ever been (professionaly). Jimmy has his head screwed on.
You’re not supposed to like work though. That’s why it’s work.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I think you can find a job that makes you content. I do like my job but it helps that my colleagues are good people.
Fair. But detesting it is a step too far. I'll be changing jobs again as soon as I get my new holiday allowance so that I can go to interviews.
I’ve came to terms with the fact I’ll hate anything in my field so all I can do is get a working pattern that suits and work as alone as possible. I’ll jump around every few years to achieve that as required.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
I haven’t mad long left working anyway so it’s not that bad.
This is it. The management team at my place are a disgrace. Far from being the motivational types, they seem to relish the opportunity to call people on minor matters. Usually publicly. I can't abide the place or it's toxic atmosphere.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
My wife left her last place for that reason. Horrible, toxic and bullying. And she wasn't paid that much to make it worth the aggro.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
This is why I've just left my last place of employment tbh. I'm all for being called out if you've made a mistake but there's a manner in which to go about it. I can ignore the bitching behaviours of colleagues until they start bitching about me because I'll always respond.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
It's both a good and bad trait though depending on hierarchy.
Getting old is :drool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Apart from having to listen to the 'artsci' crew once in a while, my job is easy as fuck.
EDIT: I reckon that when/if I get tenure and don't have to pretend to do research anymore, it will even be enjoyable.
He can have my spreadsheet for 10% of Raoul Duke’s salary.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
My wife commutes in from Southampton 3 days a week and works from home twice. It's a nice mix as house prices and cost of living is more lower here and the commute isn't too terrible. I think on our combined earnings we would struggle to buy a house in London, where as here we are looking at 4 bed detached in the nicest areas.Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
I think we may end up moving somewhere closer to London in the next few years though, not sure where exactly but possibly Reading or Guildford. Luckily I can work more or less anywhere and potentially earn more as I get closer to London.
Winchester is lovely and only 58 minutes to Waterloo.
Oh yeah I'm only paying for me. So I'm just holding back. However I've inspired her to get a better paid job which she starts in Jan so good times ahead. So she's got her own beauty business and teaches now too. How cool is that. I didn't ready inspire her but fair fucks to her for going for it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Consultants at work bought all the juniors a £15 Amazon gift card each, which was pretty nice of them. There's like 20+ of us.
On the last page, I've gone from just over 50k on Friday to a grand total of £0 as of yesterday. Offered voluntary redundancy and took it. Free money. On the job hunt from 2nd Jan.
In Switzerland we get 75% of our monthly wage for 18 months after being laid off.
Voluntary. If you're still elligible for that after chosing to leave then we should all move to Switzerland.
Nah. They don't have a Greggs.
Yeah, you get it whether you quit or get sacked. We just don’t have an ongoing unemployment benefit so after 18 months if you still want money you have to join the jobs program and they put you to work doing community service earning around 1.5k a month.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mellberg
It is compulsory for all employees in Switzerland to pay into an unemployment fund: thus you will have enough money to tide you over if you unexpectedly find yourself out of work.
You won’t only receive unemployment benefits if you have completely lost your job. If you’ve had a significant reduction of hours, you could also be entitled to a little bit of extra help.
You can expect to receive roughly 70% of your original salary from unemployment benefits, up to a maximum of 10,500 CHF per month.
Decent.
Ah well. 30k will have to do.
Job interview tommorrow. Far from hyped.
:cab: who interviews two days before Christmas?
Business does not stop.
I'm led to believe they'll be interviewing on Christmas eve also. I'm hoping to capitalise on such desperation.
It's a corner shop.
We closed for business from Friday until the 6th but we're still going in on four of those days to help move stock around. True and complete misery and probably a tactical error as I hear there is widespread unhappiness about this year's crap payrises and bitching will take place in dark corners. We even had the big boss come into the office the other day and go on the defensive about pay being linked to company results, which is thoroughly unprecedented.
This shift is fucking dragging.
I feel like I've been here at least 17 hours so far.
At least one of the managers brought in doughnuts from Tantrum. The creme brulee one. :drool:
Dare I ask how it went?Quote:
Originally Posted by Manc
I think we're gonna go to the pub at around 1pm for a pint and then finish for the day. I've got shit I need to get done at home, so that is partially motivating the early finish.
The boss gave everyone today off after a good few at the Christmas party apparently so that’s saved me a days holidays.
I've been guiding one of the India guys on how to do the routine stuff I'm handing over for the past two hours and now I'm done until boxing day. Be half logging in then really - mainly watch football and be fat all day.
I'm in 1-9 today and 8-1 tomorrow. Whoo.
My boss went to Tel Aviv for, well, presumably not for Christmas as such, so we got let out at 12. Would never happen if he was here.
He sent us all an email to tell us all about his upcoming safari holiday just after universal 2% payrises have sent morale crashing from high to rock bottom. At 80 he is too old and needs to go.
Job I was in about six years ago when morale was at its lowest ebb our MD emailed is what was effectively him saying "Have you tried being more motivated?"
Thanks gaffer, never thought of that.
It is utterly pointless being here today. There's only 3 of us in and we're still sat twiddling with our thumbs.
Leaving at 3 thankfully.
At least you're having a thumb war competition to pass the time. :thbup:
Can imagine working these sorts of days and the time between Xmas and new year in an office job being extremely cushy. The guy in my team told me he'd turn up for half the day then "work from home" so he could drink and play Xbox. Nobody will be about to be able to know or care.
Better than anticipated.Quote:
Originally Posted by mo
Easy peasy. Barely any work in and I was out by 3.
I got approached by one of the Senior Housing Officers today, telling me they've a vacancy coming out in the new year and my application would be looked upon favourably. In an ideal world I want out of the organisation all together, but I'd take a move out of my current office for now. I might even like it.
That said, a guy that has been at my place for 7 years over heard and said he was going to apply, so his experience will probably blow me out of the water anyway.
The fact he had to overhear it and wasn’t told directly hopefully means they think he’s a dickhead.
He's a good (Irish, actually) lad. He's just had enough of the same shit I have. I wouldn't begrudge him it if he got it. I think they probably just think he can't be poached because he's never applied for any of the previous vacancies in there.
You're fucking joking aren't you? Transport links to the southwest - especially trains - are shite.Quote:
Originally Posted by Andy
2 hours from Portsmouth to London - I can do Manc-London in that time.
There are ninety minute trains every hour, and twenty minutes of that seems to be trundling through London, so the trains aren't too bad. The roads are worse, especially going North via the Midlands and getting bottle-necked on the shithouse A34.
Can we all just take a minute to lol at RL being at work?
I think we can let him off for that. The NHS can't really stop.
:lol:
I love the meltdown people have about shops opening tomorrow. Twitter is great entertainment on the 26th.
I'm getting paid for morning drinking just now.
Unless some twat actually phones up later but let's cross that bridge when I drunkenly come to it.
Look at these mentalists already queuing. :cab:Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
:lol:
:rosebud:
Oh Lewis ffs.
Oh my God :D you terrible manQuote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Not one person appears to have tweeted that joke to him. I could be a big noise on Twitter me, and then I could challenge James Felton and 'Technically Ron' to a charity scrap and annihilate them both.
Got sent home early and asked not to get pissed til the time my shift finished in case there was a train crash.
Imagine if there was one now and he got the Christopher Jefferies treatment.
Yes, all the transport links are shite. I used to think the a34 was the moody bit but it's all a shitfest apart from the m40 in my experience. Now the arseholes have naused the m27 for 10 miles with an average speed check zone which is another kick in the bollocks.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
The only decent train they have is the direct one from the harbour into gatwick airport for when I've got to travel. Otherwise the train to london is slow, the first class is wank if you want to work and it then drops you at Waterloo and who the fuck wants to be at Waterloo?
The A27 and A3 going the other way are wholly inadequate as well. I think they all like it like that though, the insular island monkey weirdos.
I was caught in a fucker of a backlog on the A3 last week.
EDIT: Actually it was the M3. Near Winchester.
I floated a meet when you were over, so thanks for letting me know. :nono:
:lol: that would be tidy.
SvN was going to stick it on his expenses as well.
It's an hour and 10 minutes from Southampton.Quote:
Originally Posted by Manc sean
Reading is less than 30 mins to Waterloo on the train, I imagine that will be even quicker once the Elizabeth line opens.
Are you two near there? I thought you were in Hull.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
It was Andover I was in. A place that I would have said was in Holland or Germany going on it’s name.
I'm in Portsmouth these days unfortunately. What a missed opportunity.
Where abouts? I've spent the bulk of the last 3 and a bit years living in southsea through the week.
I'm in Southsea, near Highland Road cemetery. You work on the base as well don't you?
You can have a rumble then at least.
Yeah I work on the base. I had a top gaff on south parade until recently. Will probs rent a new place in the new year. Who you working for on the base? BAE? DIO?
I work for Defence Business Services reviewing old rubbish for sensitivities before it goes out for public consumption. South Parade is a decent area. Do you drive in?
I'd walk a few times in the summer but generally yes I drive.
Are you working on the tender docs for the new facilities management gig that's on the horizon?
We don't get anything that contemporary. I'm tentatively looking at flats around Southsea as part of my 'do something in 2020' thinking and parking is the problem. You can get something reasonably decent for not ridiculous money, but you're either battling to park on the street or not at all, and I'm fucked if I'm living in Cosham.
I got a parking permit from the council and parked in the pay and display spaces opposite the pyramids. Was a piece of piss.
I was paying £800 (CT and bills on top) for a 2 bed furnished apartment, 3rd floor with massive bay windows overlooking the solent. Top gaff. It was just me in there but pals would use it at the w/e if they brought their families down.
If you're getting somewhere you want to be overlooking the common and the sea. Although depends what you can afford I s'pose.
Why don’t you live together?
I support City now and I like to have posters up.
Being in for one day between Christmas and then being properly off next week is a proper pain in the hole.
Aye, I can't be arsed with today. The office will be mostly empty but that just means most of the calls will go to me. :moop:
FWIW I improved the tag on this thread.
Woke up at 9:30 so I guess I'll just skip work today.
Our last shift of the year is moved forward an hour because there is the sum of fuck all in the queue. It's a nice gesture but if I'm still in the office at 7pm, I'll be fuming.
Only two more days of freedom left :( :boydy:
Are you a) getting married or b) getting sentenced for something?
He's going back to work.
Got 9 days off, then 4 nights, then another 6 days off :drool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Only uses like 4 days of annual leave :drool: :drool: :drool:
I'm off until Monday. I go back to London on Thursday evening but wanted to give myself a few days to get out of the habit of eating everything in sight.
What Niko said. I never really liked it but it’s just pure hate now. Dreading the thoughts of even getting stuff ready for it tomorrow.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
Fuck. This. Shite.
I hate post holidays small talk.
I just got handed an absolute monster of a brisket :drool:
First set of nights start tonight. Eek.
The new team is alright but I don't think the conversation's going to be as good. It's just something that happens when you're surrounded by women.
I need to get out of this place pronto. No wonder everyone tops themselves after Christmas.
I'm sure you're not that bad.
In might current mood I might be.
And I've just found out one of my tenants is involved in County Lines. There's currently a 'cuckoo' 20 years her junior (2 years older than her daughter) living there. Good stuff.
At my work, we have a team of four people in my team and a Director.
A - left just before Xmas
B - leaves next week
C - is going on maternity leave in two months
D - is me, and I have a job offer but am just negotiating salary. Once that's done I think I'm going to bail
E - (a cover replacement for C) started on Monday
The Director told us today that he's leaving :henn0rz:
Feel so sorry for E, but overall it's MEGALOLZ
I'll take all of the jobz you have going.
I thought you'd sorted your new job already? The Amsterdam one, right?Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
Whys everyone leaving/left?
Ok, you start Monday.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spikey M
It got held up by Xmas. Just waiting for their salary offer to come through - assuming that's good then will go ahead. But yeah, Amsterdam.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
A + B had been there a while and kinda reached the end of a cycle. It just so happened that they both are leaving within a short timeframe. Kinda the same for the Director too really.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
I've just got an interesting offer, so will likely take it up. Have been there for a year and a half.
What's the current place and what's the new place?
Current place is a cosmetics company and the new place is a travel company.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Booking.com? :eyemouth:
:sherlock:
God nights are fucking awful.
The first one wasn't too bad, but by about 5am on the second I was absolutely dead on my feet. I'm on 3 of 4 currently and feeling not too bad, courtesy of ten hours drug-cocktail induced sleep during the day.
I nominated myself for an in-year reward before Christmas, and my line manager tried pushing it today, but apparently our overall manager blocked it because of how I 'conduct myself'. There is nothing work-related to complain about, because I do my work and then all of the shit that other departments send me; but apparently things like glazing over in meetings and then lolling out loud at 'e-mail-free Fridays' counts as not buying into the departmental way of doing things. This is Mark and Faggotgate all over again.
How does a mechanism exist where you can nominate yourself for a reward?
I had almost exactly that at Vodafone. After a year where I'd scarcely taken a break, done my own work plus whatever managers shovelled at me and either done most of the training or trained folk on the job after they'd had an idiot doing it I was graded lower on my annual review for not "showing willing" which I took to mean "being corporate."
One exists to nominate people you consider worthy. If nobody has thought to nominate themselves before then lol at them.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
How does email free Fridays work? Do you send people Morse code printouts instead?
Nominating yourself for an award. :harold:
Look upon my initiative, ye mighty, and despair.
I had "you could act like you're happy to be here" in an otherwise exceptional review. I assume HR demands that managers must provide some form of negative feedback to help you continue your "development".
I must've made £80 from awards at work by now. Training people means you're always a point of contact for some bombscare.
This the 'energise' system Lewis?
We've got that at my place and in the two years it's been about I must've seen about £2.5k worth of amazon vouchers.
On the jobs front, Im definitely moving roles this year. I did however spot a new job available this week which I'd heard rumoured. Near identical to the job I'm doing just for a bigger platform and it turns out it's a grade higher.
Told my boss I'd be an idiot not to apply for it and he is now shitting himself at the prospect of his entire team leaving at the same time.
Definitely won't get it, but I'm applying for it regardless.
Been doing some recon of people who might apply... there's not a lot of potential applicants. Might actually get an interview.
Colleague overheard my boss discussing it with the head of my discipline in the region after I'd left also, saying he was "surprised I'd come out the woodwork for it". Telling him to "fuck engineering" at last years Xmas party working well. :cool:
I don't know what it is. I got five-hundred quid onto my wages out of them last year, but it seemed like half of it went in tax and student loan costs, so I would rather have had the vouchers.Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
Nights have fucked me up good and proper. They are awful.
The girlfriend of the lad at my school who died just before Christmas died this week. I'm rather grateful I don't know the 'how' for either; knowing they took their own lives is sobering enough.
'Kinell. :|
Boss told me today I’d be wasting my time applying. Seemingly they are looking to hire an external candidate with a bit more experience. Legally that seems a bit shaky for me for an internally advertised job. I’ve printed off the job description and marked up that I meet the requirements bar charter ship, which I have ignored for the last few years because it’s not been important (might be now :moop:).Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
Going to apply tomorrow anyway. Fuck it.
Signed my promotional contract today. I'm making an extra 12-13 grand a year not including pension etc. Genuinely life changing amount, time to plan out something savings wise long term.
You’re going to snort it aren’t you?Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
Nah, even in those months when I was massively over-doing it I came out with a balance at the end of the month.
Which goes on trainers.
Congrats Phonics :thbup:
I'm getting sent up to the arse-arse-end of Scotland in mid-February, and in return for flying up on the Sunday I get two days extra leave(!). Unfortunately, I have loads of leave left over as it is, so I would rather have had the Sunday. Thank you for your service.
Applied on Tuesday (which is what I thought the deadline was) as it expires 15th (I assumed at midnight on the 14th).Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
Today my boss gave me an absolute bollocking for “applying without permission” and that he was pissed off. His tone was pretty aggressive too. He was absolutely raging. Accused me of applying and effectively lying on the form “ticking that I had line manager approval to apply”. I bit my tongue, apologised and left. I was absolutely raging, didn’t think he was right and I didn’t need approval as I’d been in role more than two years (he told me I was wrong, it was three).
Checked when I got home:
1. My contract, signed 2.5 years ago. States I will not considered for other roles without line manager consent within 2 years.
2. The application process asks whether I have “informed my line manager of this application”, not got permission to apply. (Which I did, as above).
Going to speak to a senior engineer in another area of the business on how to approach a conversation with my boss and then talk to him about. Basically he abused the shit out of me with no substance. Concerned he will either hold it against me, factor it wrongly in my performance review scoring or complain (wrongly) to others in the business - his temp boss is a senior leader in the job I’ve applied for.
I want it to be a calm, sensible discussion where I can show that I didn’t intent to disrespect him and haven’t done anything wrong.
If he gives me any grief at all, I’m leaving the office and going home but speaking to HR on the way out. He’s clearly stressed but he can’t flip out on me like that (he did it before Xmas too and actually apologies as he realised he was stressed and took it out on me).
Thoughts?
Bring someone with you.
I'll come with you if you can wait a month. I'm not shaving my head though.
Been offered a job with the Panama papers people. Less money, risk of getting car bombed but could be fun.
Do you drive? Problem solved.
It’s like buying two.
:lol: fucking hell.
Whys that in the jobs thread?
Congratulations on your job at B&Q, Mahow.
Started my new job at the beginning of the year and have hammered the hours where I can but I've made an absolute cock up in that way more stuff is store bought or frozen than I am happy with so I figured I'd give it two months to get myself settled locally then look for something else. I don't mind the chaps that I work with but there's so little passion or interest from any of them that it's really frustrating. I expected way much more after my trial but unfortunately it's all a bit shit. Sad times.
I'm toying with the idea of finding a new career but given my lack of skills I'm unsure as to what so perhaps working part time and finding something I can work towards are the way forward, I think. It's so demoralising though as I thought I found a good place where I would be able to progress and learn more but how much can one learn when you bang so much stuff in a microwave. :cry:
Because I'm a mong who can't read.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Retirement watch will be fun this year. 3 are definitely going with a 4th trying for medical retirement and a couple on long-term sick leave.
Wasn't your new job something where you had a bit more control over the output? Why not stick around and steer things in the direction you'd prefer rather than just looking for the door because things aren't exactly to your liking right away?Quote:
Originally Posted by Smjffy
If you like working in a kitchen and want to learn more then go part time where you are if possible and go to college for a food prep course or something. If the interest is there on your end you'll get there, and better that than bouncing around different fields until the perfect job falls in your lap.
Mostly because it's soul destroying. I've only been there two weeks and it genuinely feels like I've been there a life time already. 12-10pm isn't all too bad in chefs world but it drags and drags until maybe 6pm when you get people coming in after work and that's where it goes to shit too. I'm no food snob but I do think if people are paying decent money for it then the least you can do is put some heart into what you're doing. Other examples being I went to make a tomato sauce for pizza's only to discover it's bought in, I went to find peas so I could let them soak for the day so I could make mushy's only to discover they are tinned and bought in. I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say in the two weeks I've been there I've probably made a carbonara sauce and that's about it. I'm going to give it another two weeks and then I think I'll be forced to find something more fitting or seek a different line of work.
I was tempted to go to a cooking school as it happens but then I was getting told by chefs that it would be pretty pointless now as although I'd gain certain skills, it's quite expensive given I'll learn much more on the job. My other idea was sticking it out for as long as I can to get some funds behind me then try and create my own product and go the e-commerce route whereby I try to package it and sell it but I'm a dumb fuck at the best of times so that'll probably lead to delusions of grandeur.
You might as well walk tbh.
A kitchen set in their ways like that is only going to bring you down.
Considering going for a job at a school I used to work at before I was a teacher. They've been through heaps of change and were part of a town-wide lambasting from Ofsted a few years ago, but the names on the staff list look pretty familiar, which is unusual given it's been nearly ten years and all the upheaval. There's also another role potentially attached to it which would be pretty interesting, overseeing the trainees and NQTs. Going to message a few people who are still there and get their take on it.
I did exactly this last night. I think as much as it would be nice to stay local, I'm going to take a week off then look for what's around down south again, save up and go to a culinary school then start again maybe unless I can stumble across something else that appeals in a different line of work.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
I find it's more important for me to be happy with what I'm doing as opposed to just working for the sake of working.
I've seen less transient Pikeys than you.
There's nothing wrong with putting morale before a wage. I'd much rather be like myself than to be some poor sap stuck in a job they loathe as they have no alternative.
You're meant to be on JSA full time if you're going to be chucking lines like that about.
I'd usually tell Smiffy just to stick with it but chef work is probably a shitshow if I you don't like the staff you work with.
It's one of the worst thing, I can put up with a lazy chef as you can always take on the work load but instilling a bit of passion or pride in someone is much harder.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
I've had two chats thus far, one is in a nice rural area in Shropshire which comes with it's own flat, the other was in Barnet but it was with the intention of training me to be a Sous Chef and so I told the head chef straight off that that is a bit beyond me at this moment in time. I could learn on the job but that's half of my problem at the moment in that I'm still inexperienced in my mind and there's plenty that I don't know or can't do to a level I'm satisfied with.
The search goes on!
Rejected without an interview. Think I was the only internal applicant too. Asked for feedback on why I was rejected.Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
Not unexpected that I didn’t get the job given when I was told by my line manager but to not even get an interview despite already doing the job on a near identical platform is a bit demoralising.
Anything further happen with the boss man who was going mad about it?Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
I talked with him at the end of the following day after spending the entire day pissed off. Told him he had crossed the line with his tone and false accusations but reassured him that my intent was not to disrespect him nor leave his team ASAP. All sorted. Bit of a misunderstanding even if he did act the knob.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
I told him I was worried he was stressed and overworked and that he needed to push back and/or ask for help because it was affecting his temperament.
Does anyone have the option of “remote working” aka working from home? I do now, since getting a work laptop rather than desktop PC. How do you motivate yourself to do work and not, well, anything else? :uhoh:
I’ve done like 45 mins work in about 3 hours. Meanwhile I’ve played WoW and had loads of tea.
Then you don't have enough to do and/or enough urgency about the things you do need to do. If something has to be done tomorrow, you'll do it.
It's not for everyone. I struggled for about a month and then got used to it, and managed to become productive.Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz
I only do it when I need good WiFi but I live 5 minutes from the office anyway.
I can work from home but don't like it at all for the very reason Baz mentions. And in turn because of the reason Maz mentions, I don't have enough to do.
But I didn't like.it at my old job when I was stupidly busy either.
I could do without the DWP giving our number out to claimants. Again.
I wouldn't want to work from home, at least not at my current stage of life. I like getting up and heading out into the world, even if in my case 'the world' is always Chertsey.
If I was sat at home all day I'd end up making myself a futon of rice, or using Shreddies to remove the sleep from my eyelids, and end up fired or mad or both.
I tried to work from home first Friday of January. A mixture of very productive when you actually work because there’s no distraction of meetings and people, but very unproductive when you realise nobody is watching you in your trackers and a football shirt cleaning and watching Netflix.
Wanking and watching porn*
There must be some people that get dressed for a day working from home. Or at least half dressed for a conference call.
My old work used to have it in our contracts that we could do it two days a week. My current place doesn't have anything in the contract about it but we can do it now and again.
I'm still productive at home as I'm always paranoid they'll think I'm slacking off.
But I agree with Jim, I like getting up and heading out into the world. Living on my own now, I'd probably not speak to anyone all day when working from home. Plus everyone in my office now is sound and I like my work so I don't feel tired of the few dickheads like in the last place and want to avoid them for a day.
One of my wife's friends works for a cruise line. She had a Skype interview with them at stupid o'clock because they're based in America.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
So, she got ready for bed from the waist down and ready for an interview from the waist up. Cue them asking her to stand to demonstrate something.
Hilarity ensues, she gets the job, I've heard the story 60 times and I hope the fucking boat sinks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co_DNpTMKXkQuote:
Originally Posted by Baz
Promotion confirmed today. Find out any monetary change in March but hopefully it'll be a payrise.
Nice one. Congrats keeks.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Good start to the weekend.
How can you be offered a promotion and not agree terms first?
Says the guy that changed careers and then got a pay cut lol.
They're sort of independent (?) - so the corporate title has changed and then your boss will put in to try and get the most money from you. I heard there were a few promotions in other years which didn't have a pay rise associated with it...
That's a bloody good job there m8.
In fairness I'd say if he tripped and fell in shite there'd be a winning lottery ticked stuck in it, so he'll get a rise.
How do you reckon THE GROUP are re-acting to this joyous news?Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
GS has had his first wank.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
Promotion and brexit day? It's pretty joyous for him.
This is a strange one, do you perceive me as some lucky sort?Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
I’d imagine so anyway. Not that I’d begrudge you whatever luck you get though. Fair play to anyone shit is going well for.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
True enough. His balls are probably like raisins at this stage.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Red white and blue.
Black and blue at least.
There ain't no black in the Union Jack mate.
I'll be moving to Amsterdam in a few months to start a new job :holland:
Our boss came in today very grumpy but did drop the bombshell that we may be in this for the long haul. I was looking forward to redundancy.
Nice one. Congrats! Be quite an interesting place to life as a foreigner as imagine the language barrier isn’t really there much.Quote:
Originally Posted by Raoul Duke
Thanks. Yeah you don't really need it but I can get Dutch lessons though work. I'll try it a bit and see how it takes.Quote:
Originally Posted by Foe
I hear Dutch grammar is mad bullshit.
Big companies, Championsleague, Apple, Amazon, I thought that one of them we would draw. And it is *wherever you now work*
Work has set us all up with LinkedIn Learning accounts and requested that we start with "Outlook 2016: Efficient Email Management."
All three hours and six minutes of it.
It's everything you'd expect it to be and less.
EDIT: The only thing to come from this video is that the person has pronounced the 'p' in 'excerpt', which I always thought was a silent p.
However upon Googling it to prove to myself how magnificently right I am pronunciation clips (including English ones) also pronounce the p and some linguistics forum that Google brought up had a thread full of people saying they don't treat it as a silent p.
Have I been living a lie?? I was going to moar fredz it but I thought that would be a bit dull even for me.
Next you'll be saying you can't believe there's no 'x' in 'expresso'.
Of course you're supposed to pronounce the p but the Scottish are so different that I'd expect them to not pronounce the r or the t and replace the whole cluster with an oi
https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/excerpt
You'll see in the pronunciation audio clip the speaker pronounces it so much he breaks the microphone
I'm not Scottish and had heard the word before I moved here.
More to the point, how the fuck can they drag 3 hours out of email management?Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian
By rather than just going "Here's the screen where you filter some emails, the options are all pretty self explanatory" actually explaining what every sodding button does.
"Now, the SORT BY button...."