The ULTRAMEGA Summer 2017 Transfers and Rumours Thread [featuring THE MIGHTY BLADES]

[Giggles]

I always presumed brand.

[Baz]

What's there to cover really? Their list of premier league transfers that keeps popping up at the side of the screen has like six players on it.

I will never get my head around why clubs leave so many important and expensive decisions to the very last minute. Do clubs not make plans for recruitment? Or is it good for 'the brand' to be chasing players on deadline day?You must have done it on FM.

My most recent deadline day panic buy was De Rossi to Liverpool for £16m. :lol:

[Giggles]

FM is going to be mental next time round with these fees. It should just be as simple as them doing a multiplier of 5 or 6 on existing code but you know they'll make a hash of it.

[Mazuuurk]

Babacar will turn out a bit like Okaka at Watford, I imagine. Okaka was an FM don too, right?

Anyway, I forgot to let everybody know about my incredible ITKledge from last week. During Brighton v Barnet you'll never guess which football legend turned up... Glenn Roeder! I thought he was a scout at West Ham, but Wikipedia says he's a "managerial assistant" Stevenage. Its difficult to say which of Barnet's stars he may have been looking at, but expect some action.


That's quite typical yeah. Usually, I think, these guys excel - for their age - at younger ages because they are so much more powerful that their peers. And so they look like better talents than what they are, and get hyped up on places like FM and in Goal.com toplists, etc.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We have some bloke called Davide Zappacosta having a medical. If the name being that of a late 80s F1 backmarker hadn't rung enough alarm bells, I've googled him and he looks like some Sicilian wine waiter.

[Mazuuurk]

FM is going to be mental next time round with these fees. It should just be as simple as them doing a multiplier of 5 or 6 on existing code but you know they'll make a hash of it.

Yeah but then the problem is some players are peacefully going for quite regular sums, all things considered, between the other leagues. It's just the Premier League and PSG really, and then to some extent the fallout of the teams they raid having more money than they "should".

[Baz]

We have some bloke called Davide Zappacosta having a medical. If the name being that of a late 80s F1 backmarker hadn't rung enough alarm bells, I've googled him and he looks like some Sicilian wine waiter.Nothing can stand in his way.

[Yevrah]

Sky have Given and Lescott on like it's Match of the Day. I'm out.

Why's that a problem?

[Giggles]

Why's that a problem?

It's not. I turned it off.

[Yevrah]

FM is going to be mental next time round with these fees. It should just be as simple as them doing a multiplier of 5 or 6 on existing code but you know they'll make a hash of it.

It should be easy enough to model the impact in the big leagues realistically, but I can see already that Dinamo Goat Herders are going to want £80m for any youngster with any sort of potential. So just an extension of FM17 really.

[Weaver]

Danny Drinkwater's at Chelsea's training ground, awaiting the thumbs up from Leicester for a medical. No fee has been agreed yet. Tick tock.

[niko_cee]

Apparently this Babacar fellow doesn't fancy a stint on the south downs.

Has anyone bought Niasse yet?

[Waffdon]

Mahrez doing his best Peter Odemwingie impression then hahahah

[niko_cee]

What is the deal with Tim Krul anyway? He was highly rated once upon a time. Did that bizarre penalty sub thing break him? Has he just fallen out with Rafa (surely not!) or is there something else there? My Brighton sources tell me he's going to be their 3rd choice, which seems rather :cab: seeing as their first choice is a midget Australian who has difficulties with the ball coming straight at him.

[Mike]

"You can't live in Liverpool all your life" Amazing from 'Merse'

[Waffdon]

That's Llorente, Chamberlain, Lukaku and now Barkley all turning down Chelsea.

[Giggles]

What's going on there that he knocked them back? He seemed desperate to leave Everton and wouldn't go to the league champions?

[Shindig]

What is the deal with Tim Krul anyway? He was highly rated once upon a time. Did that bizarre penalty sub thing break him? Has he just fallen out with Rafa (surely not!) or is there something else there? My Brighton sources tell me he's going to be their 3rd choice, which seems rather :cab: seeing as their first choice is a midget Australian who has difficulties with the ball coming straight at him.

Sidelined with a long injury. When he returned, he had two established keepers ahead of him. Yet, we slapped a new contract on him last season before the Ajax loan. It's all been compounded by his lack of game time which... Brighton might not give him.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What's going on there that he knocked them back? He seemed desperate to leave Everton and wouldn't go to the league champions?

Turned us down during the medical they say. Did the doctor touch him up or something?

Doubt he'd get a game with us tbh.

[Mike]

He clearly heard the 'if you go a chippy in London it doesn't do gravy' and quickly left.

[Giggles]

Turned us down during the medical they say. Did the doctor touch him up or something?

Doubt he'd get a game with us tbh.

The Everton owner sounds gutted about it.

[Lewis]

Another moved killed by his shit decision-making.

[Waffdon]

He'll be after a bigger sell on fee when he leaves on the cheap in January.

[Lofty]

Presumably Youtube is about the best babysitter going.

Apparently not as they have a real problem with people making imposter videos that seem legit but are actually disturbing for kids, but still generate views and therefore money. Like Peppa Pig except Peppa goes to the dentist and scream whilst all her teeth get drilled out.

[Giggles]

Reg did Towell go on loan after? I don't see anything mentioned.

[Baz]

Apparently not as they have a real problem with people making imposter videos that seem legit but are actually disturbing for kids, but still generate views and therefore money. Like Peppa Pig except Peppa goes to the dentist and scream whilst all her teeth get drilled out.:lol: Trolling kids is a pretty dreadful waste of time.

[Boydy]

Apparently not as they have a real problem with people making imposter videos that seem legit but are actually disturbing for kids, but still generate views and therefore money. Like Peppa Pig except Peppa goes to the dentist and scream whilst all her teeth get drilled out.

:D

Probably really annoying if you actually have kids but that's hilarious.

[Baz]

Slammed shut

[Mike]

That countdown was underwhelming

[niko_cee]

Toddler crack, as it is known, is fairly ubiquitous on youtube and you don't really run into the bad stuff all that easily (there's just too much fucking mother goose club and disney collector out there). I'd say Amazon Instant Video is a better babysitter, although the tc makes it onto there increasingly as well, albeit slightly differently.

[SincereTheRebel]

Get the fuck outta here with these youtube talk.

Is walcott still at arsenal or did he also get sold?

[niko_cee]

They tried to sell him but the buying club rejected him.

[Shindig]

We're down. There's no way we can survive with Atsu at left back. Sterry, Laschaaf, Dummet. All knackered or sold. Jesus Gamez? Is he fit?

[niko_cee]

Brighton have got their season resting on a mysterious late extension and the hope that Vincent Jansson (who seems to be the rumoured player) isn't as shit as most of you think. Hmmm.

Makes sense with the various Spud connections and he's probably better than anything they have at the moment, even if he is dreadful.

[-james-]

Dortmund have actually given Jadon Sancho the number 7 shirt. Fucking hell. If he'd stayed in England there's no way he was ever getting below 25.

I don't understand how a 17 year old can "force a move". Just deal with the week long strop.

[Reg]

Reg did Towell go on loan after? I don't see anything mentioned.
Rotherham have just announced they've got him on loan.

Pretty happy with Krul. Hope we give Ryan a proper chance though.

I can't recall seeing Schelotto play. But he seems a high pedigree player for us to have on the bench.

[Lewis]

Is Jadon Sancho going to be good, or is he Ravel Morrison?

[Gray Fox]

This is the shittest #DeadlineDay I remember there being in a while.

[-james-]

Is Jadon Sancho going to be good, or is he Ravel Morrison?

He's pretty great in youth games, but fuck knows what that means. He's never played a senior game. Has a brilliant turn of pace which is obviously going to make you look good against Norway u17s but his end product is generally pretty swish as well.

Shrewd of him to move to the best club he could possibly be at, presuming he is good though.

[Reg]

Brighton have got their season resting on a mysterious late extension and the hope that Vincent Jansson (who seems to be the rumoured player) isn't as shit as most of you think. Hmmm.

Makes sense with the various Spud connections and he's probably better than anything they have at the moment, even if he is dreadful.
To continue the strangeness, it would have to be a permanent move because we've used up our two PL loans.

What an odd life it must be as a footballer sometimes. Think you're the second choice striker for a title contender then suddenly you have a couple of hours to decide if you fancy committing the next few years of your life to a relegation favourite.

[Lewis]

He's pretty great in youth games, but fuck knows what that means. He's never played a senior game. Has a brilliant turn of pace which is obviously going to make you look good against Norway u17s but his end product is generally pretty swish as well.

Shrewd of him to move to the best club he could possibly be at, presuming he is good though.

I assumed his contract was up (or hadn't yet signed a proper one), but it's an actual transfer. As you said, how do you let a seventeen year old force a move?

[niko_cee]

Mugged off by Janssen I see. It's going to be a long old haul until January now.

[Weaver]

It looks like Drinkwater and Zappacosta were confirmed by Chelsea before the deadline, but nothing from Leicester about Adrian Silva coming.

Apparently the Spanish window is still open until midnight tonight, so Costa, Coutinho and a few others could still move yet.

[Raoul Duke]

Chelsea have completely shit the bed this window. Hilarious stuff.

[ScousePig]

Presumably Youtube is about the best babysitter going.

All the kids want to be 'youtubers' when they're older, but YouTube is banned/inaccessible in most schools.

[SincereTheRebel]

Wolves have bid £10m for Jurgen Locadia who plays for PSV. Anybody know anything about him. He is dutch, and at this particular time. Dutch football is terrible.

PSV decided they do not want to sell him in the end.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2017/08/33.png

'Who are you?'
'I'm a signing, mate.'

[SincereTheRebel]

Ravel Morrison has signed for some mexican team called atlas
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-4842546/Ravel-Morrison-leaves-Lazio-join-Mexican-Atlas.html

[John Arne]

That Chelsea training top looks exactly like the England away shirt.


https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PO5DOqTMYZ8/VurEOjDjCBI/AAAAAAAA01I/PmwHZjXfLM0WkQK833cdFHxJSRuyWXfWg/s1600/england-euro-2016-kit-3.jpg

[Kikó]

Good luck to Ravel. I do expect him to be as arrested crossing the border beck into the UK with a shipment of cocaine in his hand luggage.

[Adamski]

A guy I work with is related to Sancho bizarrely. Rejected a 30k contract at City.

[SincereTheRebel]

Getting into man city as a youngster via the youth system does sound difficult. Dortmund as a youth, sounds good from my perspective. Given the number he has been given, sounds like he could be used in the first team on the regular.

[Cheddar]

Barkley must have forgot that the medical consists of a drug and alcohol test. Must not of wanted to go through that off the back of a bank holiday weekend.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As some have pointed out, agreeing personal terms and then changing your mind during a medical is an odd thing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

lol at Virgil van Dijk, by the way. Southampton should make him train with the kids for the rest of his contract.

[SincereTheRebel]

I dont think ive seen a transfer window with so many players expected to leave, but either they were forced to stay or nobody came in for them worth talking about.

All the players involved, especially mahrez, van dijk and bartley need to be playing for their freedom.

[mugbull]

I'm fucking glad that clubs are taking control. It's good for the players themselves that they're not jumping ship every time a slightly better club comes sniffing. It's also good for the other clubs.

[mugbull]

Also, anyone know what Barkley's racial background is? He's definitely got some black in him but he looks way too white to be half-black. Quarter maybe? Ryan Giggs tier?

[Jimmy Floyd]

He has a Nigerian grandad or something like that.

[SincereTheRebel]

I'm fucking glad that clubs are taking control. It's good for the players themselves that they're not jumping ship every time a slightly better club comes sniffing. It's also good for the other clubs.

Its a gift and a curse.

I prefer players to move around all the time. especially to rival clubs. I dont feel players should be held at a club against their will. Selling and buying players is part of the game.

Clubs are in absolute control. I dont know how transfer work 100% but the club has to accept an offer for a player before he can leave. If a player is at a club, and a bid is accepted. It shows the club really does not give a fuck about the player in the first place. If they did, they offer wouldnt be accepted in the first place. The club need to be loyal, not the players.

[John Arne]

I prefer players to move around all the time. especially to rival clubs. I dont feel players should be held at a club against their will. Selling and buying players is part of the game.

Clubs are in absolute control. I dont know how transfer work 100% but the club has to accept an offer for a player before he can leave. If a player is at a club, and a bid is accepted. It shows the club really does not give a fuck about the player in the first place. If they did, they offer wouldnt be accepted in the first place. The club need to be loyal, not the players.

Whilst I understand the sentiment... players really shouldn't be signing 5 year contracts if they feel they may want to move on in a couple of years. Coutinho, for example, signed a 5 years contract just 6 odd months ago. It's a bit of a pisstake. That said, I'm not a fan a players being treated like assets by clubs - so I agree, that there needs to be some middle ground.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Most players will have literally zero control over their future, agents will do it all for them and make the decisions. Especially applies to the likes of Brazilians who have been lifted out of poverty.

Whoever is advising van Dijk has had an absolute nightmare.

[phonics]

Wazza has used his break from International Football well. He's been arrested for drink driving.

903580884359667713

[Foe]

It'll be hilarious is Everton just let Barkley run down his contract and train with the kids, scuppering any chance of him making the World Cup squad.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Wazza has used his break from International Football well. He's been arrested for drink driving.

903580884359667713

I never understand rich people getting done for drink driving. They've got enough money for a taxi or even to pay a driver to drive their car home.

[Baz]

Darron Gibson did it while also at Everton (crashed into a petrol station) and got a pay rise. :cab:

[Mazuuurk]

Meanwhile I'm just thinking that Mourinho was not involved in any of all this madness, and his comments about Lukakus fee going to end up being "cheap" or whatever now makes quite a lot of sense.

There's a strange pivot that's happened where Mourinho seems like one of the more normal ones in extreme situations.

[niko_cee]

Sounds like Arsenal have really played a blinder with their handling of Sanchez. Can't see how he'll really be bothered to play for them again. If you're going to strongarm someone into seeing out their contract you can't say they can go at the last minute and then pull the rug out from under their feet. Now they'll get substandard service for a few months, if he even bothers to come back from Chile, before selling him for a fraction of what they could have in January. Ingenious.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd have got rid, accepted a mid-table finish and played Iwobi/whoever's next off the conveyor belt.

[SincereTheRebel]

They may not even be able to sell him in January. In January, anyone from overseas can approach him to sign a contract and June them in June 2018. Teams can try and sign him for transfer in January but he could negotiate on a bosman also in January. He could agree to leave for free.

[niko_cee]

I doubt they'd be midtable, but they're also unlikely to get into the top 4 with or without Sanchez so I don't really understand what they're playing at. Particularly with the late shenanigans. You can't really fuck someone over like that, even if it seems the right/understandable thing to do. The likes of Coutinho and Van Dijk are in much weaker positions with regard to their clubs, and their clubs stayed consistent (well, I suppose Coutinho could still go but I doubt that will happen now).

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Charlie Adam said him staying was the best transfer deal this Summer. Lol.

He won't give a fuck if he plays, they won't finish top 4 and they'll get nothing for him.

TOP BUSINESS.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Arsenal made a nice £17 million profit this summer. That should get Arsene a nice new kitchen, or perhaps another vineyard in the Alsace.

[CJay]

I saw a rumour linking Ozil with Barcelona tonight. I have no idea where he will go next, but I'd say it's more likely to be Besiktas than Barca.

[Jimmy Floyd]

UEFA have opened an investigation into PSG - and so it begins. They'll miss several years of CL football when it's done.

[niko_cee]

I can't imagine the FFP rules will stand up to any serious legal scrutiny, so hopefully PSG go nuclear.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They'll get a heavy fine and a squad restriction though.

[Lofty]

Arsenal made a nice £17 million profit this summer. That should get Arsene a nice new kitchen, or perhaps another vineyard in the Alsace.

£30m profit and it's all going into the LA Rams new stadium.

[Lewis]

I thought the poor cunt taxpayers got lumped with the bill when a sports FRANCHISE moves town.

[Giggles]

Mad looking stadium they're building too. Presumably the Chargers are stumping up half though.

[John Arne]

Ryan Kent has joined SC Freiburg on loan for the season. Good move for him, that.

[-james-]

UEFA have opened an investigation into PSG - and so it begins. They'll miss several years of CL football when it's done.

You seem to have an awful lot of faith in UEFA.

[mugbull]

You seem to have an awful lot of faith in UEFA.

It's not 'faith' man, it's reasoning about the motivations of the powers at be. Level 2 thinking, let's say. Level 1 thinking being the typical John "i am well-read and it has happened this way in the past; therefore, it will happen this way again" and then Level 2 as "i understand why things happened the way they did in the past, and i can apply this to my worldview in the present."

[niko_cee]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41134630

:D

[GS]

It must be devastating for them that other clubs didn't just hand their players over for free.

[Ian]

Did I read that they threatened to not bid for him any more at one point?

"We'll let you keep your best player and see how fucking like that, you cunts!"

[Giggles]

€200m :D

Not even the most hardened tinfoil hatter could argue he's worth that in any era of transfer madness.

[GS]

Well, obviously. It was clearly designed to either a) not lead to his sale or b) if it led to his sale, it was at a value that nobody could argue the point.

Of course, the far more likely scenario is that Barcelona are spinning their failure to sign the player for a domestic audience.

[niko_cee]

It's clearly made-up.

[Lewis]

Did anyone else miss Chelsea spending two-hundred million quid? Half of it seems to be on rubbish as well.

[Waffdon]

They could have done with a few extra players, but after their initial three signings everyone they were buying are clearly squad players. Probably why everyone rejected them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

You seem to have an awful lot of faith in UEFA.

I have faith in 'The Big Clubs'.

[phonics]

I love when Bruno de Carvalho gets in the news, it's always good.

Sporting and West Ham are in a bit of a spat over the William Carvalho transfer that didn't happen. Here's his quote:

"Where is it? Proof? Now, approaches, for sure. I’ve had them for almost the whole squad: West Ham supporters call Mr. David Sullivan and his brother, the Dildo Brothers…

“These messengers, these offended virgins, the president of West Ham… We must tell the truth!”

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41118927

Fifa has rejected Leicester City's application to register midfielder Adrien Silva after the club missed the deadline by 14 seconds.

lol

[randomlegend]

It seems ridiculous to me that clubs cut it so fine. Could they really not come to an agreement and get things going 1 day earlier? It's not like it was some mega £200m drawn out SAGA.

Although they are obviously crooked nobends, I kind of agree with Fifa sticking to the deadline. Of course you can lol at it being '17 seconds' but if you start making exceptions then you're definitely on a SLIPPERY SLOPE.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Probably not, as Drinkwater was happening similarly late.

[SincereTheRebel]

I remember arshavin being outside the emirates stadium at 2am waiting for the transfer to arsenal to be completed. Funny business.

[Adramelch]

I just discovered via FM that Rodrigo Possebon of United fame is now playing in non-league of Brazil at the age of 28.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41188235

Reckon that's a decent move for all concerned, except agents and the press.

[phonics]

Jannssen has gone to Fenerbache on loan. He looked like Soldado 2.0 from day one so no surprise really.

[Reg]

There's talk that Spurs were trying to force him out. Can't blame him for going there after turning us down.

[Lewis]

I missed that closing the transfer window stuff. It's a good idea, but a bit daft to just do it unilaterally. The big clubs should be alright, but everyone else is just going to be held to ransom (as with everything I suppose).

[mugbull]

What do you mean?

[Lewis]

If the dirty foreign clubs know our sides have to get their business done earlier than everybody else they have more leverage. The big clubs won't care and will just pay whatever (like they do anyway), but Arsenal and newly-promoted sides might be less happy to pay any further premiums.

[Lewis]

Or maybe they will be less likely to piss about knowing English sides can't wait around for some idiot to force a move. Whatevs.

[mugbull]

I was thinking the latter tbh, it just means other leagues will have to operate to such an extent on the English schedule, since British transfers are such a big proportion of money spent, that nothing will really change that much, except that the squads will all be decided before the season starts, which is good.

You can see this with places like France (who feed most of their players to the UK anyway) already going for the window shift themselves.

[John Arne]

I heard some interesting news today.... Cristiano Ronaldo would apparently be up for moving to the MLS in 2019, but would also want some club equity, similar to the Beckham deal at Miami.

[Yevrah]

Given he'll likely still be a monster in 18 months time it sounds like bullshit.

[Lewis]

If his Twitter is anything to go by he seems to have significantly upped his brand/cashing-in stuff over the past year, so it wouldn't be all that surprising if he went over there whilst he could still kill it (and command an equity share) rather than turning up shit and looking like Mickey Rourke.

[Spikey M]

Yeah, that's horse shit. For all his faults he seems more interested in winning shit and being the best than being a big fish in a puddle of diarrhoea.

[Lewis]

Yeah, but if his winningism is just egomania (which it is) then going out on his own terms and building/establishing a new club around himself sounds right up his street.

[John Arne]

It came direct from his representatives... but of course, they could have just been talking balls (to big him up).

[Shindig]

To do it right, they need to also name the location of the franchise after him.

[John Arne]

They were talking to LAFC representatives, but apparently they wouldn't commit to anywhere. It's obviously never going to be Phoenix, Seattle or somewhere shit like that - LA Galaxy perhaps - Miami you would think is a little too Beckham-centric.

I can't see him going to somewhere like China... the only options you'd think are retire at Real, rejoin Man Utd or head to the US.

[Shindig]

Option 4: Return to Sporting and grab all of Jardel's records.

[John Arne]

Do Madeira have a team?

[Shindig]

Maritimo, Uniao, Nacional. He started at the latter.

[John Arne]

I had no idea that Maritimo were from Madeira.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He'll go to America soonish, as he will want a long-lasting media presence and America is where all the revenues are for that.

[Lewis]

Wikipedia informs me that David Beckham 'had received an option to buy an expansion franchise for $25 million as part of the contract he signed with the league when he joined the Los Angeles Galaxy'. That is some serious foresight from somebody whose supposed thickness was a national joke at the time. :cool:

[John Arne]

I think he struggled early on to get a site for the stadium in Miami - but I think they may have recently secured something. Inter Miami :drool:

[Spikey M]

To do it right, they need to also name the location of the franchise after him.

The Cleveland Cristiano's? Rhode Island Ronaldo's?

[mugbull]

The dumbest England player of recent times was definitely Rio Ferdinand. If you read his twitter feed for long enough you'll go blind.

[Spikey M]

The dumbest England player of recent times was definitely Rio Ferdinand. If you read his twitter feed for long enough you'll go blind.

That's a bold claim in such a competitive field.

[Boydy]

Let's not forget Steven Gerrard once said his favourite type of cheese was 'melted'.

[Spikey M]

Let's not forget Jamie Redknapp exists.

[mugbull]

It looks like Rio's twitter got taken over by agents now, sadly. Used to be a goldmine.

[mugbull]

Let's not forget Steven Gerrard once said his favourite type of cheese was 'melted'.

Honestly sounds like something I'd say

[Shindig]

The Cleveland Cristiano's? Rhode Island Ronaldo's?

No, I'm talking you literally rename an American town or state after Cristiano Ronaldo and then base the team there. The Cristiano Ronaldo Ronaldo's.

[Boydy]

Aren't you basically American now though? They don't know shit about cheese.

[mugbull]

Aren't you basically American now though? They don't know shit about cheese.

We like cheese, Julia Child did us wonders.

[Spikey M]

Monterey Jack isn't cheese. Plastic shite.

[niko_cee]

"Cheese food"

:sick:

[Disco]

Wisconsin is famous for cheese isn't it? Some of it must be passable.

[mugbull]

American cheeses are solid of course, but Spikey and squad can't pass up an opportunity to shit on America for whatever it gets brought up in relation to.

[Spikey M]

Your food is generally great, but the cheese I have encountered has been utter shit.

[Boydy]

American cheeses are solid of course, but Spikey and squad can't pass up an opportunity to shit on America for whatever it gets brought up in relation to.

Solid? I thought they were usually whipped in an aerosol can?

[igor_balis]

I think America approach cheese in the way we approach coffee (or at least how less middle-class people of the previous generation did) - badly. I remember my dad's slightly batty ex-girlfriend (no, not my mum) making us a big flask of coffee for a day delivering catalogues, and she put about half a tea-spoon of Nescafe Gold in it. Madness.

[niko_cee]

Well, I suppose that's better than approaching cheese in the way they approach coffee.

[Foe]

Let's not forget Steven Gerrard once said his favourite type of cheese was 'melted'.

Melted cheese is the only good cheese.

Sounds like he was bang on.

[Boydy]

I think America approach cheese in the way we approach coffee (or at least how less middle-class people of the previous generation did) - badly. I remember my dad's slightly batty ex-girlfriend (no, not my mum) making us a big flask of coffee for a day delivering catalogues, and she put about half a tea-spoon of Nescafe Gold in it. Madness.

I'm intrigued about people's coffee habits now.

[mugbull]

Solid? I thought they were usually whipped in an aerosol can?

I'll say I've encountered way more junk food in London than I'd ever find in anywhere i've lived in the states. Now, no one can compete with the American South, and they probably raise our overall numbers by a lot on their own, but it was interesting anyway.

[Adamski]

Melted cheese is the only good cheese.

Sounds like he was bang on.

Melted cheese isn't a type of cheese though you melt.

[Foe]

Melted cheese isn't a type of cheese though you melt.

Sorry, I should've been more specific.

Melted orange cheese.

[igor_balis]

Melted orange cheese.

Enough about Mahow's foreskin.

[SincereTheRebel]

Benzema signs a new four year deal. He is 30 this year. I dont know what the plan is with him, but given the influx of attacking youngsters they have, I would have though benzema would have been moved on. C.Ronaldo would take up the CF postion in his old age and fill in the blanks. He has been there nine years now.

http://www.skysports.com/football/news/11835/11044781/karim-benzema-signs-four-year-contract-at-real-madrid

[Reg]

So we had Tim Krul on loan for the current season. And we've now signed him on a permanent contract ... lasting the current season. The only two possible reasons: so that he can play against Newcastle on Sunday, and/or so we can loan another Premier League player. It seems strange but maybe it's not costing much.

[Shindig]

The fuck? We made such a big deal about him signing a new contract before last year's loan to Ajax. I'm sure it was a three-year extension.

EDIT: Nah, out of contract in the summer. Probably the only way we'd get anything out of him.

[Adamski]

What happened with him? He was fairly decent before the latest relegation.

[Spikey M]

Has he done anything since the World Cup penalty lolfest?

[phonics]

What happened with him? He was fairly decent before the latest relegation.

He did his cruciate at one point I think.

[Weaver]

What happened with him? He was fairly decent before the latest relegation.

I think his injury record has played against him, as well as other goalkeeper's doing well in his absence (Elliot, Darlow, and we've high hopes for Freddie Woodman)

Because Krul has tenure, he's on quite big money, and Benitez seems to trust Elliot, leaving Krul kicking about doing nothing.

[Waffdon]

Costa deal been agreed to Atletico. Him under Simeone again :drool:

[Lewis]

The Chelsea transfer crooks look to have struck again.

[Giggles]

£58m for a lad you don't even want in the building is good going.

[niko_cee]

£58m for a 28 year old top, top striker is probably a bit of a bargain these days.

[Jimmy Floyd]

'Atleti' have been conned there.

[Spikey M]

£58m for a 28 year old top, top striker is probably a bit of a bargain these days.

He can only play once a week because his hip is made of marbles or some bollocks. Who knows how long he has left at the top.

[SincereTheRebel]

Its smells of torres to chelsea.

[Shindig]

Should've went to China and disabled some poor Chinese internationals.

[-james-]

He's never going to play for Chelsea again and is presumably on mental money. Atletico could have offered half of what they did and Chelsea would have been pleased to have got rid of him.

[John Arne]

Ozil off to the MLS next summer....

Seems a tad early for him - but given he's a bit of bottler - doesn't really surprise me.

[John Arne]

How the fuck have Chelsea got that much for Costa???? Baffling.

[Max Power]

Sir Nigel Pearson apparently taking over at Belgian second tier side OH Leuven.

Maybe not so surprising as they are a Leicester City feeder club but he was sacked (twice) so still a bit odd.

[phonics]

While I do think he'd be mega for them. I don't think Evertons issues with pace are going to be solved by signing Olivier Giroud.

[niko_cee]

For £40m.

[phonics]

A picture of the man in his underpants is worth that alone. Needs to lose the beard though.