The ULTRAMEGA Summer 2017 Transfers and Rumours Thread [featuring THE MIGHTY BLADES]

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He's not good enough to play in the middle.

[Waffdon]

He's better than Drinkwater, who they're going to buy.

[Yevrah]

Looks like Coutinho's going. The fee must be mahoosive.

Modelling all this craziness in FM is going to be a challenge for Miles and his sexy t-shirts.

[Gray Fox]

Barcelonas last bid was £114m or so. Though you'd imagine the fee will be similar to, if not more than the Dembele fee.

I wasn't too convinced he was going, but the sudden appearance of £65m to bid for Lemar has me assuming he's gone. I'm wondering if it's dependant on us signing someone before he goes.

Monaco have now signed Balde Keita and Jovetic so they might sanction the sale of Lemar. It could well be a very hectic last 2 days of the window.

[SincereTheRebel]

Chamberlain has rejected Chelsea as he thinks they'll play him as a Wing Back, apparently.

If thats true, oxlade needs to be applauded. He wants to play in a specific postition whereever that is and is rejectiing teams based on that.

[Baz]

He wants to play for Klopp.

[niko_cee]

Hopefully they make an insulting offer for him to generate some extra seethe, although I'm not quite sure what insulting is these days. £20m and 50p?

[SincereTheRebel]

Danny waterdrink has handed in a transfer request.

[CJay]

How many times in his career has Chamberlain actually played in the middle? This feels like Walcott wanting to play up front, and everyone bigging him up as a striker without him ever actually playing there.

[niko_cee]

He played there for Southampton in the dim and distant past. He could possibly function quite well in one of Liverpool's 'number 8' roles.

[Offshore Toon]

Rumours that Gayle fell out with Rafa and is off. The fees being touted are mad, so I hope something goes through.

[phonics]

West Brom have signed Kieran Gibbs permanently and, he of copy and paste, Grzegorz Krychowiak from PSG on loan.

If they keep hold of Evans they'll have had an excellent summer. Just need to find a decent striker now.

[Shindig]

Rumours that Gayle fell out with Rafa and is off. The fees being touted are mad, so I hope something goes through.

£20m. That might as well be two Cabayes.

[John Arne]

The Ox is a little unfortunate in that the recent hipster change to 532/433/4231 has kinda ruined him. He doesn't want to play wing-back, but he's not offensively good enough to play as a wide forward - he needs to find someone playing 442... give 'Arry a call, perhaps....

[niko_cee]

I thought that Krychowiak was meant to be the tits? What's he doing going to West Brom?

[SincereTheRebel]

The Ox is a little unfortunate in that the recent hipster change to 532/433/4231 has kinda ruined him. He doesn't want to play wing-back, but he's not offensively good enough to play as a wide forward - he needs to find someone playing 442... give 'Arry a call, perhaps....

he probably needs to take a step down, in order to make a step back up. I understand his pain. Seeing the likes of ozil and walcott ahead of him in the wide forward spot probably pisses him off if he wants to play there. Ozil isnt suited to play wide right in a front three and walcott isnt doing anything special for several years now. Both should have been sold already.

I dont see him starting in his preferred position in any of the teams who rival arsenal. Maybe going back to southampton or a team like everton or leicester would be beneficial for his career. Move overseas to monaco could also be an exciting move if possible.

[Magic]

£20m. That might as well be two Cabayes.

I think we were rumoured to have bid £15m? We need to keep that for big Vern ffs.

[phonics]

It must be so depressing to be Dwight Gayle, spending your career getting teams promoted only for them to dump you back to the Championship when you do so.

[Magic]

If you have a shit attitude it's all you're good for.

[GS]

Chamberlain is never good enough to be playing in the middle at a top six club.

[SincereTheRebel]

Chamberlain is never good enough to be playing in the middle at a top six club.

I dont think ive ever seen him play there but one of his biggest strengths is running with the ball. If he plays thorough the middle, that strength will be restricted. Now, unless he is secretly messi that is waiting to be unleashed to the world through the middle. Playing in the AMC does not sounds like the best option for him.

He is a right winger, who is as strong as an ox. I like his style, but he does not get goals or assists to match his ability.

[Mazuuurk]

He's just not a Central Midfielder at all in my opinion.

He's fast, explosive, can dribble, can cross,
He can't shoot, he can't tackle (or I've never really seen him try), he's not got the most exact passes or the smoothest touch.

He's a winger. A good, old-school winger. He'd be great for Manchester United about 15 years ago.

[phonics]

Frankly, he's a tremendous right wing back which is why I was terrified of him going to Chelsea. Imagine if Victor Moses was actually good.

Meanwhile a good summary of the last few days

902537133767974912

[Jimmy Floyd]

Oxlade's had a bit of a mare here as phonics says. Wingers have gone out of the game and he's not even slightly got the presence to be a central midfielder, other than as a total luxury alongside two blockers in a lesser side.

Right wing back is the vogue position and he's good at it.

[Magic]

There are still wingers in the Championship. :henn0rz:

[Waffdon]

Krychowiak was superb at Sevilla. That could be a very decent signing.

[niko_cee]

I'm fairly sure the Andy position on Chamberlain (which I take as authoritative) was that he was a central midfielder. Good engine, decent technical ability, a good all-rounder (Milner II!). That he's spent the last 5 years or whatever it is having that beaten out of him so he can play as a winger, which he isn't, and now a wingback, which he's even worse at has maybe wrecked that, but I'd be willing to take that chance for the right price (which is about half what Arsenal want for him now, or nothing next summer).

[phonics]

He's an excellent wingback. I have no idea where the idea that he's not good at it has come from. It's the first thing he's looked like excelling at in about 3 years.

[Magic]

Who the fuck is Andy. He's too busy going around enjoying himself and being successful to bother with us, so fuck him and his 'authoritative' opinion.

[John Arne]

He's an excellent wingback. I have no idea where the idea that he's not good at it has come from. It's the first thing he's looked like excelling at in about 3 years.

Excellent? Is he though? I read earlier that he has only ever played 8 games as a wing-back... 3 of them this season - seems a tad too soon to judge, no?....

[Magic]

Excellent? Is he though? I read earlier that he has only ever played 8 games as a wing-back... 3 of them this season - seems a tad too soon to judge, no?....

:D

oh phonics, m8

[SincereTheRebel]

198 games for arsenal
10.461 minutes completed
20 goals
32 assists

52.8 minutes completed per game
9.9 games per goal
6.1 games per assist

[Lewis]

The Chelsea move made a bit of sense for various reasons, but if Liverpool are promising him games in his preferred position[s] then it is a crap signing for them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Looks like we're going for Drinkwater instead.

[John]

Chelsea signing Drinkwater makes more sense if Conte is so pissed off that he's planning to leave and he wants to salt as much of the earth as he can on the way out the door.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Leicester don't need to sell apparently.

*enters hardware store*

I'd like four candles, please. How much?

'Not for sale at any price.'

[phonics]

TBF the exact same midfield partnership won the league 2 years ago.

[niko_cee]

Well, Keiran Rowe from Brighton (but a Chelsea fan) has certainly upped the Oxlade-ante on the bbc transfer feed thing:


I'd love The Ox at Chelsea. Would fit in well as a wing back, centre midfield or maybe even a back up centre back. I think his style suits Conte's football down to a T.

?!?!?!?!

Drinkwater seems an odd one, but then he did form a good partnership with Kante at Leicester.

[Lewis]

If you chose to sign Danny Drinkwater you would merely be underwhelmed. If you had to sign him because you let Nemanja Matic go to your rivals you would be seething.

[Mazuuurk]

Wasn't this Bakayoko meant to be the Matic "replacement" anyway?

Seems a little odd, all of it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If you chose to sign Danny Drinkwater you would merely be underwhelmed. If you had to sign him because you let Nemanja Matic go to your rivals you would be seething.

Apparently Bob Putin signed that one off himself behind the club's back, much like he did with Cech a couple of years back.

[Lewis]

His outlook on these things is a bit strange. It's almost like he's more organised criminal than businessman.

[SincereTheRebel]

The image SSN are using for sanchez in the transfer center

http://i.imgur.com/Hc3iUaL.png

[Lewis]

The best DEADLINE DAY story I've seen all day is United offering Chris Smalling and thirty million for 'Alexis'. They should do it just for the MELTDOWN.

[randomlegend]

Left to right that looks like the progression of someone given a sedative for a psychotic episode.

[randomlegend]

Wasn't this Bakayoko meant to be the Matic "replacement" anyway?

Seems a little odd, all of it.

From what I understand Bakayoko's meant to be more of a box to box playing than a holding midfielder like Matic.

Chelsea really were seriously daft to let Matic go, especially to United.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Our entire transfer policy this summer has been seriously daft, but that's what you get when it's run by an unholy coalition of Michael Emenalo and the KGB.

[niko_cee]

Krychowiak to West Brom and now Renato Sanches to Swansea?

:cab:

[Lewis]

That Swansea one is mental. If he is out on loan for his Bayern/Big Club future, donning it at somewhere like Everton would be alright, but even being the best player at Swansea by a mile hardly does anything to help that.

[niko_cee]

£40m agreed for Oxlade-Chamberlain to Liverpool.

Mental.

Makes Coutinho look a snip at £150m or whatever it is.

[Mike]

Does he not know I've backed Swansea to come last this season! He better not mess that up.

[niko_cee]

Liverpool getting themselves well set for a post-Brexit reintroduction of the foreigners rules though. Could at least field a team within the old rules, what was it, 3 fgns and 2 assms?

[phonics]

That Swansea one is mental. If he is out on loan for his Bayern/Big Club future, donning it at somewhere like Everton would be alright, but even being the best player at Swansea by a mile hardly does anything to help that.

Paul Clement was Ancelottis assistant.

[John]

People aren't going to take more notice of a good season for Swansea just because their manager has Ancelotti's phone number.

[Lewis]

I see why it happened. The point is that he is selling himself short.

EDIT: As above.

[randomlegend]

Well Ancelotti might take notice of his former assistant's opinion, which could be quite useful seeing as he's manager of Bayern.

[niko_cee]

I suppose, short of sending him to Juve as part of their unholy alliance, no one half decent is going to be interested in developing him for a year without the option to buy him, so if they do want to keep him (maybe) he has to drop to a club that'll just be happy to have him in the short term. And, I guess, where he'll be reasonably guaranteed games.

Most exciting youth in Europe to loaned to Swansea in less than a year. Take heed Kylian.

Cue Liverpool taking him on loan with no option to buy . . .

[Waffdon]

£40m agreed for Oxlade-Chamberlain to Liverpool.

Mental.

Makes Coutinho look a snip at £150m or whatever it is.

Not really. Maybe if it was Mane that was being sold.

[niko_cee]

That'll be next year.

Along with Firmino.

:moop:

[Boydy]

£40m agreed for Oxlade-Chamberlain to Liverpool.

Mental.

Makes Coutinho look a snip at £150m or whatever it is.

Oh ffs.

[niko_cee]

I can't help but think that Liverpool would have been better off signing Howedes (just gone to Juve for £3.5m rising to £13.5m if they want to keep him) and Krychowiak (loan to WBA) instead of spaffing quite so much on The Ox, but what do I know?

[niko_cee]

That said, I bet neither of them were boyhood Liverpool fans, so there is that.

[phonics]

He's twice the player lallana is but without the good decision making. If klopp can get that into him he'll boss it.

[Lewis]

Spoiler: He won't.

[John]

He's twice the player lallana is but without the good decision making. If klopp can get that into him he'll boss it.

You should make a custom FM database. I bet it'd be very accurate.

[Boydy]

He's twice the player lallana is but without the good decision making. If klopp can get that into him he'll boss it.
:lol:

[Waffdon]

Aye, decent signings for Liverpool - especially if they sign Lemar as it looks - but I'm not sure why they aren't ploughing money into a decent 'keeper or centre half. Seems far too obvious.

Coutinho must be gone otherwise they've got ridiculous depth in midfield

[Shindig]

Leeds, Norwich and Fulham going in for Gayle. I had a brain fart and thought £15m might be close to our record sale. Then I remembered Andy. You'd get your £35m back for him in this bollocks climate.

[phonics]

:lol:

Lallana at 25m seemed a complete rip off but wasn't. This will end the same.

[SincereTheRebel]

Should have brought back jordan ibe

[Magic]

Leeds, Norwich and Fulham going in for Gayle. I had a brain fart and thought £15m might be close to our record sale. Then I remembered Andy. You'd get your £35m back for him in this bollocks climate.

Norwich were in for 18m I heard.

[Shindig]

Well, we better be spending that money now because Mitrovic has a three match ban. :moop:

Remember when £18m was the kind of crazy money Villa spent?

[GS]

£40m on Oxlade-Chamberlain.

Madness. Absolute madness.

[SincereTheRebel]

He is a direct replacement for coutinhodinho

[GS]

If they signed Oxlade-Chamberlain and Lemar, and sold Coutinho, then fine. I have no idea how they envisage all of these players fitting into the squad without selling him, frankly.

It's like when I used to sign a load of players on free transfers on FM only to realise that I'd somehow ended up with seven strikers by mistake.

[Foe]

If they signed Oxlade-Chamberlain and Lemar, and sold Coutinho, then fine. I have no idea how they envisage all of these players fitting into the squad without selling him, frankly.

It's like when I used to sign a load of players on free transfers on FM only to realise that I'd somehow ended up with seven strikers by mistake.

Sign Eidur Gudjonhnson on a free transfer. Sell a week later for £20million. Classic.

[Raoul Duke]

Ox-Cham could become a Herrera-like midfielder apart from the fact that Liverpool only have a bunch of flanges running about there instead of Ogba/Fellainimania and Matic.

[Yevrah]

Given that Wenger hasn't developed a player successfully for God knows how long now it's hard to tell whether 'the Ox' is a good signing or not.

The fee is all but irrelevant.

[Magic]

Definitely not in for Gayle now confirmed.

[niko_cee]

If they signed Oxlade-Chamberlain and Lemar, and sold Coutinho, then fine. I have no idea how they envisage all of these players fitting into the squad without selling him, frankly.

It's like when I used to sign a load of players on free transfers on FM only to realise that I'd somehow ended up with seven strikers by mistake.

If they sign Lemar it would presumably mean Coutinho is off, but otherwise it seems fairly workable.

Front 3 from : Mane, Salah, Firmino, Sturridge and Coutinho (youths to supplement in lesser comps)
Midfield 3 from: Can, Henderson, Wijnaldum, Milner, Oxlade-Chamberlain and Lallana, with the latter two perhaps able to fill in further forward as necessary, and Coutinho could come back into the midfield to break down the defensive wall which is bound to manifest itself quite often.

Basically 2 players for every position so they aren't completely bollocksed by the inevitable injuries which will come.

Stick a top, top centre half in the mix and you might almost be able to forget about the travails in nets.

[Adamski]

I'm not sure if anyone else has noticed but I reckon phonics has very quietly had one of the worst days posting I've ever seen on here.

Congrats.

[Magic]

I'm not sure if anyone else has noticed but I reckon phonics has very quietly had one of the worst days posting I've ever seen on here.

Congrats.

Yesterday was pretty bad for him. And Monday.

[Lofty]

The Ox is Reyes' English regen, good on the ball, shits himself in the tackle. Possibly the first ever transfer that is bad for both teams.

[Reg]

He's twice the player lallana is but without the good decision making. If klopp can get that into him he'll boss it.
That's a bit like saying 'this is twice the Formula 1 car but without the good speed'.

[mugbull]

If Celtic MoussaDem joins Tottenham MoussaDem as they're saying might happen I'll shit myself

[Raoul Duke]

If they sign Lemar it would presumably mean Coutinho is off, but otherwise it seems fairly workable.

Front 3 from : Mane, Salah, Firmino, Sturridge and Coutinho (youths to supplement in lesser comps)
Midfield 3 from: Can, Henderson, Wijnaldum, Milner, Oxlade-Chamberlain and Lallana, with the latter two perhaps able to fill in further forward as necessary, and Coutinho could come back into the midfield to break down the defensive wall which is bound to manifest itself quite often.

Basically 2 players for every position so they aren't completely bollocksed by the inevitable injuries which will come.

Stick a top, top centre half in the mix and you might almost be able to forget about the travails in nets.

You forgot Ings, la.

Your defence is still bobbins and both goalkeepers seem to only play until they make some ridiculous fuck up and then the cycle repeats.

[Lewis]

There should be a rule or maxim for intelligence-related caveats. 'Welbeck's razor' or something.

[Waffdon]

Barcelona have bid over £100m for Dybala now hahahah. It's not their attach they should be worrying about. Their midfield is past it and their defence is...yeah.

[Waffdon]

Mahrez is finialising a deal according to Alergia's NT Twitter but no idea where. Assume Chelsea is where he's headed.

[randomlegend]

There's been rumours of United for the last couple of days.

[Lewis]

I don't see the point of another wide player. If Bareth Gale (or even 'Alexis') was available then go for it, but anyone less than top, top drawer is a bit of a waste of time at the moment. The two getting minutes there need them, and there is enough depth for rotation.

[randomlegend]

He'd be good on the right, but it'd mean binning Mata off for the most part.

[Waffdon]

It's either Barcelona or Chelsea he's signing for according to Twitter.

[Lewis]

He seems quite important to the shape at the moment, but I suppose it wouldn't be a terrible option there.

[niko_cee]

You forgot Ings, la.

Your defence is still bobbins and both goalkeepers seem to only play until they make some ridiculous fuck up and then the cycle repeats.

Poor Danny.

Someone should really take him on loan *COUGH* Brighton.

As has been suggested elsewhere, I don't think there's a particularly feasible personnel based solution to the defence. Without being able to call on defensive titans like Valencia, Jones and Blind there's only so much you can do. I think the problem is more systemic so it's going to have to be full steam ahead on the we'll score more train. Still hoping for Van Dijk (no idea why, but he's the only one they want) but they'll just sign another €100m attacker instead (if wee Phil goes).

[Raoul Duke]

Mata/Micky Targaryen are more effective than Mahrez. Valencia could still cover there if needed too.

[Mazuuurk]

Mahrez, wouldn't he go to Arsenal? Seems like they have been interested for ages.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I have an acquaintance on my twitter who is a srs bizness Arsenal fan, and he spent the whole of last night retweeting stuff about the club having no money and no one else will be coming in, in a hail of fury. You have to laugh.

[niko_cee]

Tell him not to worry, a bank busting bid for Jonny Evans is in the pipeline . . .

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Mahrez thing sounds silly - he wants a move but no one has made an offer, so he's sat in Paris airport waiting and hoping, while Algeria - who need a win in Lusaka tomorrow to stay in any realistic contention for the World Cup - get on their jollies.

Classy bloke.

[SincereTheRebel]

This Mahrez thing sounds silly - he wants a move but no one has made an offer, so he's sat in Paris airport waiting and hoping, while Algeria - who need a win in Lusaka tomorrow to stay in any realistic contention for the World Cup - get on their jollies.

Classy bloke.

That cant be true. He isnt really in the airport waiting on whatsapp...

[phonics]

Arsenal aren't signing anyone today because they can't afford to due to the massive wages gimps like Matthieu Debuchy and friends are on and the rules about wages in proportion to income. Arsenal, the only team who manage to be poor with 150 mil in the bank. Well run my arse.

[niko_cee]

Llorente to Spurs to further shit on Chelsea's chips?

No idea.

I guess this means Janssen is available. He might be quite handy for a lower/mid-table side. Google says £23m to West Brom.

[phonics]

'This Vincent Janssen blokes a bit immobile, let's get Fernando on the phone'

[Jimmy Floyd]

Do we have a buyback clause on Patrick Bamford I wonder.

[niko_cee]

I'm sure whoever has him now will willingly return him.

[Max Power]

Arsenal asking £27m for Calum Chambers. What's he done to more than double his value since he signed? Insane.

[niko_cee]

Footballers are the new London houses.

They escalate in value regardless of objective reality.

[SincereTheRebel]

English premium ay it.

I liked how arsenal had quite a few english players who get game time. Most of them were average but they got chances in the first team. Looks like they are all getting thrown away now as just not good enough, rightfully so.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Arsenal fans deserve better.

Ipswich fans don't obviously because they all drive tractors, and don't get me started on Peterborough fans.

[phonics]

I'm at the point of apathy where I'm down for selling everyone and we go back to Jack Wilshere putting 6/10 balls through to Giroud. At least I knew why we were shit then.

[John Arne]

https://gyazo.com/12a8464bd929a00e9a21a803baabf32e.png

[Weaver]

Has there been any mention of a Southampton sell on clause for Chamberlain? They've not really been linked with anyone specific but it could help them buy another player even at 20%

[niko_cee]

Most of their sell-on clauses got Jewed out of them when they were in the shit, didn't they?

[Lewis]

Are the Arsenal owners trying to do what the Glazers did, just without a good enough manager to make it work?

[John Arne]

Really surprised that Danny Ings is still hanging around. He would be ideal for the likes of Burnley, Brighton, Huddersfield or Swansea.

[niko_cee]

£35m seems to be the official (BBC) price for Oxlade-Chamberlain.

:harold:

[Lewis]

If they spend some/most of that on Ross Barkley then, instead of just lolling, we should support the resident Arsenal fans in choosing their new club.

[John Arne]

Who thought it would be a good idea for the last day of the window to coincide with a round of international fixtures? Genius.

[niko_cee]

In a hopefully not prophetic move Brighton are signing the captain of the Costa Concordia from Sporting Lisbon.

[phonics]

If they spend some/most of that on Ross Barkley then, instead of just lolling, we should support the resident Arsenal fans in choosing their new club.

http://i.imgur.com/G0P3T6E.jpg

[Gray Fox]

It's not a wow signing, but it's one I like. Some help at centre back should be the next thing on the list.

[mugbull]

http://i.imgur.com/G0P3T6E.jpg

See? This shit's funny.

[phonics]

Could do with a better picture of Pulis but having that up in as people walk by my office was getting dicey.

[Lewis]

That will do.

[Gray Fox]

https://i.gyazo.com/c8d4474cf2a359d64e02b35b4c64e3c8.png

[Giggles]

£35m is a pittance these days.

[niko_cee]

Is Aurier allowed in the country these days?

[Mike]

Yeah, Centre back next and someone to coach them in the art of defending corners.

[phonics]

Is Aurier allowed in the country these days?

Yeah his court case was yesterday and got cleared.

[mugbull]

In the top 5 craziest things of this transfer window is Janssen potentially moving to West Brom for 25 million. We bought him for 17, he's shown himself to be completely incapable of playing Premier League football in any game he's played, and now a Premier League team is about to buy him at a nearly 10 million profit. Wondrous.

[niko_cee]

And all that profit and more is going on 32 year old Fernando Llorente.

Troubling times.

[Giggles]

I thought Llorente was at least 36. Seems like he's been around forever.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bamford's not for sale at any price apparently, so we've had to go back in for Leon Knight.

[niko_cee]

I'm sure Persib Bandung (?) would be willing to let Carlton Cole go, for the right price, natch.

Christ! Even better. He's recently had his contract terminated with them.

[mugbull]

And all that profit and more is going on 32 year old Fernando Llorente.

Troubling times.

Totally worth it, Llorente is perfect for what he's being signed for.

[John Arne]

I'm sure Persib Bandung (?) would be willing to let Carlton Cole go, for the right price, natch.

I'm pretty such he was sacked last week for being outrageously unfit.

[Disco]

John Spencer could probably still do a job.

[Yevrah]

In the top 5 craziest things of this transfer window is Janssen potentially moving to West Brom for 25 million. We bought him for 17, he's shown himself to be completely incapable of playing Premier League football in any game he's played, and now a Premier League team is about to buy him at a nearly 10 million profit. Wondrous.

Buying provably crap players from other Premier League clubs is one of my footballing bugbears.

What do West Brom's scouts do all day?

[phonics]

All West Broms signings this year have been pretty good?

[Byron]

So in news from the shittest club in the league;

1. We've been told to do one after asking about a loan for Mirallas. Ignoring the fact that we need some defenders, we've decided to go for yet another fucking striker.
2. Sakho was initially told he could go to Rennes but we've then cancelled the transfer at the last minute, saying the striker (who wants to leave and didn't show up for training this week) will apparently be a vital part of our plans.
3. Apparently the Carvalho deal won't go through because the owners don't want to pay the extra £2m that Sporting are asking. I don't think there's enough lol's to cover than in a world where 'The Ox' moved for £35m in the last year of his contract.
4. No other deals in the pipeline, because we're fucking shit and our owners are shit.

[Reg]

In a hopefully not prophetic move Brighton are signing the captain of the Costa Concordia from Sporting Lisbon.
Seems it's all going on now: along with Schelotto we're after Denswil (some defender from Brugge), there's talk of Krul from Newcastle, and we've rejected a bid from Reading for Hemed (I'm glad we're sticking by him). And we're still after a striker.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sullivan and Gold are fucking quality. They'll probably take West Ham into League One and beyond.

They'll end up using Dagenham & Redbridge as an outground for when there's monster truck racing in the Olympic Stadium.

[Byron]

I for one look forward to our gutsy Quarter Final exit to Oldham in the Johnstone Paint trophy or whatever it's called these days.

[John]

All West Broms signings this year have been pretty good?

Other than Burke and Krychowiak, both of whom will be new to the league so may well be toss, it's been nothing but punts. Jay Rodriguez missed two full years and was poor last year, Gareth Barry has probably outlived his usefulness in the Premier League, and Kieran Gibbs is rubbish. Hegazy looked alright in his debut, but you're talking about a bloke who's in his mid twenties and has one full season of football in the Egyptian league behind him.

[wullie]

Renato Sanches:


His arrival further bolsters Clement’s options in midfield, which has been boosted by the recent signing of Sam Clucas from Hull City.

That's how you hype a proper star.

[John Arne]

Jordan Sancho off to Dortmund is perhaps one of the more bizarre transfers of the day.

[-james-]

Buying provably crap players from other Premier League clubs is one of my footballing bugbears.

What do West Brom's scouts do all day?

I think it's more likely that that rumour was total nonsense than their transfer dept. is useless. As phonics said, they've done some of the best business in the league.

Renato Sanches to Swansea is one of my favourite transfers ever.

Leverkusen have bought a 19 year old defender with 15 league starts to his name from Olympiakos for £20 odd million. That's got to be a Greek transfer record by some distance.

[Giggles]

How did that Renato Sanches thing happen? I know he never lived up to it but is he gone that far downhill?

[John]

Jordan Sancho off to Dortmund is perhaps one of the more bizarre transfers of the day.

Dortmund signing a fictional man is a bit odd.

There probably aren't many better places to be as a young player than Dortmund.

[-james-]

How did that Renato Sanches thing happen? I know he never lived up to it but is he gone that far downhill?

Paul Clement is Ancelotti's mate. It's a hell of an upgrade from Sigurdsson.

[Giggles]

Forgot about the Clement factor. They'd have been at Bayern at the same time wouldn't they?

[John]

He's been Ancelotti's assistant at a few different clubs, Bayern included.

[-james-]

Wikipedia reliably informs me that he was his assistant at Chelsea, PSG, Madrid and Munich .

"Carlo m8, got any CMs lying about?"

[phonics]

There's a lot of things in the air so how much of it is bollocks I don't know.

Mirror are claiming we've accepted 60 million for Sanchez which has freed up enough profit/wage bill to bring 3 in. The likely candidates being Lemar, Draxler and... Ross Barkley.

[Adramelch]

I think it's more likely that that rumour was total nonsense than their transfer dept. is useless. As phonics said, they've done some of the best business in the league.

Renato Sanches to Swansea is one of my favourite transfers ever.

Leverkusen have bought a 19 year old defender with 15 league starts to his name from Olympiakos for £20 odd million. That's got to be a Greek transfer record by some distance.

Mitroglou to Fulham was the previous one I believe and that one was 12 million or so?

EDIT: Manolas was 15 million euros apparently. Still quite the difference, especially for a 19year old, but he was a target of several big teams iirc.

[phonics]

PSG have realised how massively corrupt the loan for MBappe looked and have made it a straight transfer, hence the need to get Draxler out of the door before UEFA's FFP crew get a look at the books.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Have PSG thought all this through, or do they just reckon they can get away with anything? European royalty will ensure they get a lengthy European ban.

[John]

Draxler going out the door for forty million isn't going to fill much of the three hundred and fifty million quid hole they'll have made this summer if that Mbappe deal goes through under the new terms. They'll need another hundred million in corrupt sponsorship on top of that.

[phonics]

Draxler going out the door for forty million isn't going to fill much of the three hundred and fifty million quid hole they'll have made this summer if that Mbappe deal goes through under the new terms. They'll need another hundred million in corrupt sponsorship on top of that.

They've got that coming in from Nike due to the Neymar deal as well as a host of Brazillian sponsors (apparently).

[phonics]

There's some truly thrilling opinions and takes out there

903260789154488322

[Mazuuurk]

The guy knows his math :cool:

[phonics]

Can't imagine the equation he had to put into Excel to get that one out. 6 super computers working in tandem for a year to produce that take.

[Lewis]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6cIMlKtfE0

He's sick of it.

[Mazuuurk]

That guy is excellence of eloquence personified :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Does 'Robbie' actually manage to carve a living on the back of those people? It's a bit sadistic.

[Yevrah]

There's a lot of things in the air so how much of it is bollocks I don't know.

Mirror are claiming we've accepted 60 million for Sanchez which has freed up enough profit/wage bill to bring 3 in. The likely candidates being Lemar, Draxler and... Ross Barkley.

What's this freeing up profit/wage bill business about? Has that come straight from Wenger's box of bullshit?

[phonics]

Does 'Robbie' actually manage to carve a living on the back of those people? It's a bit sadistic.

About 40k a month I think it worked out at. Here's the car he just bought:

https://www.thickaccent.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/C59PjRGWMAApdgQ.jpg


What's this freeing up profit/wage bill business about? Has that come straight from Wenger's box of bullshit?

You can only increase your wage bill a certain amount every year as a percentage of revenue or whatever, it's in FM.

[Yevrah]

You can only increase your wage bill a certain amount every year as a percentage of revenue or whatever, it's in FM.

I'm gonna need to see the workings that show Arsenal need to do this before they can buy anyone before my bullshit detector calms down.

[Lewis]

I figured he would make a living from it, but ten grand a week. Fucking hell.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That can't all come from clicks. Do they have mega sponsorship deals or something?

Plus he must have to pay for the equipment/production and presumably pay the contributors.

[Lewis]

Making the videos can't be that expensive, and the contributors all claim not to make anything from it (although a few of them have their own 'brands' on the side of it). What a genius.

[SvN]

500,000+ subscribers on YouTube. 10 videos with over 1 million views. It's lucrative stuff.

[Yevrah]

Honestly gents, we're missing a trick.

My niece is hooked on Ryan's Toys, which started with a kid opening toys and is now videos of him doing any old shit.

Here he is shopping for school stuff, posted 10 days ago.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QMcWL9v9ak

4.3m views and counting.

[Lewis]

TTHTV: Magic's Marriage (Angry Rant)

[SvN]

We can get our man involved


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMcxUZfcv9Y

[Mazuuurk]

Those videos are fucking insane.

Kids videos on YouTube in general are insane. Any old shit will get 5 or 10 million views (my son is happily contributing, and since I let him I suppose I shouldn't complain about it).

[Yevrah]

Presumably Youtube is about the best babysitter going.

[SincereTheRebel]

I dont want to jump in with your werido's but arsenal have bid £92m for lemar according to SSN

France are playing the dutch this evening. This is all mental.

[Waffdon]

YouTube is serious stuff. They're all faking "beef" right now on it and releasing "diss tracks". Half them must own at least one Supercar alone. I'm surprised Arsenal TV is making that amount just off 500k Subscriptions right enough.

Lol at Arsenal bidding £90m for Lemar - they've got the worst of the lot at double the price for leaving it so late.

[Disco]

YT ad revenues have tumbled fairly recently so he's probably not making as much these days. Plus having people swearing throughout tends to get you flagged and that means even less from advertisers.

[John]

Pretty much anything can get millions of views on YouTube now if it's packaged right. If it's aimed at children you're looking at billions of views.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xqqj9o7TgA

Four hundred and eighty million views.

[Yevrah]

Isn't the biggest lol about that that Arsenal are supposedly attempting to spunk £90m+ (it's probably bullshit) on a player they don't need?

[SvN]

If they buy him it means Sanchez is off.

[phonics]

903274272826814464

That's that deal dead then.

[Waffdon]

Isn't the biggest lol about that that Arsenal are supposedly attempting to spunk £90m+ (it's probably bullshit) on a player they don't need?

They do need him now Sanchez and Chamberlain are offski, but the fee is bonkers, even taking the inflation into account.

[Yevrah]

Pretty much anything can get millions of views on YouTube now if it's packaged right. If it's aimed at children you're looking at billions of views.

Having just looked at the top 20, they all appear to be music videos.

With this absolutely dreadful effort at number 1.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=56&v=kJQP7kiw5Fk

Number of views equivalent to half the globe.

What are the highest views for things that aren't professional music related?

[phonics]

I've never seen him play but I just got Lemar tatooed across my back. If anything goes tits up now, I can just claim it's dedicated to the GOAT.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/29/Lemar_-_It%27s_Not_That_Easy_CD1.jpg

[phonics]

Having just looked at the top 20, they all appear to be music videos.

With this absolutely dreadful effort at number 1.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=56&v=kJQP7kiw5Fk

Number of views equivalent to half the globe.

What are the highest views for things that aren't professional music related?

It was probably PewDiePie. Despacito is a truly awful song enjoyed by terrible people, very popular in football dressing rooms.

[Yevrah]

If they buy him it means Sanchez is off.

Are there still not areas they should be strengthening in first?

[John]

What are the highest views for things that aren't professional music related?

No idea, but the user with most subscribers, almost twice as many as second place, is some twonk who plays games and shouts over them.

[phonics]

I had a quick check of Wikipedia, there are only 3 non-music videos in the top 50.

One is a Russian cartoon about a bear (not the one Challenger liked) the next is an animated video of 'Wheels on the bus' and rounding it out is an indian nursery rhyme.

[Danny]

Sanches in my Prem FUT team next season then :drool:

[Waffdon]

Video games, or folk who started as such, are probably the biggest Youtubers. Pewdiepie, who John mentioned, will be a multi millionaire. Easily.

Just search "FaZe" on YouTube and look at the houses they're living in.

Edit: views wise, popular music songs will always have the most views, obviously.

[Mazuuurk]

A weird thing in all this crazyness is meanwhile, Real Madrid has sort of become one of the more sensible clubs in Europe with this new mentality to bet on their own academy and young, spanish talents like Asensio, Carvajal, Isco, etc

[John]

PewDiePie, that's the one. From what I've seen his videos should be used to torture captured ISIS soldiers.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuIcBPm90aM

Twenty one million views. See how long you can last.

[Weaver]

We can get our man involved


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMcxUZfcv9Y

Forgot all about this - superb :D

[Lewis]

I am pretty sure that next summer some players with only half his (Paulp Ogba's) quality probably will cost the same money or more, so I am waiting for that moment to release him from the scrutiny... I think the next summer can bring a few surprises at this level and probably Paul will lose his status as the world's most expensive player, which is probably a good thing.

How do you MIND GAME the entire transfer market?

[phonics]

PewDiePie, that's the one. From what I've seen his videos should be used to torture captured ISIS soldiers.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuIcBPm90aM

Twenty one million views. See how long you can last.

He's since lost all his sponsorship deals due to complaints from people in his neighbourhood blew up.


Next week, neighbors are holding a meeting with city leaders, police and code enforcement officials to consider whether or not to file a class-action public nuisance lawsuit against Paul and the homeowner.

“It’s terrible, it’s a bad situation and I feel bad for them, but there’s nothing we can do,” Paul responds. “Jake Paulers are the strongest army out there.

“Dab,” he adds, before dabbing onscreen.

Before signing off the newscast, Paul also turns his camera on the KTLA reporter. He points at his shoes and yells, “What are thoooose? (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2015/08/05/what-are-those-a-subversive-sneaker-meme-explained-for-the-olds/)” before running away with his friends.

[John]

That could not conceivably be less interesting.

[SincereTheRebel]

Wolves have bid £10m for Jurgen Locadia who plays for PSV. Anybody know anything about him. He is dutch, and at this particular time. Dutch football is terrible.

[John]

Wolves have bid £10m for Jurgen Locadia who plays for PSV. Anybody know anything about him. He is dutch, and at this particular time. Dutch football is terrible.

He was supposed to be Kluivert, Van Nistelrooy, Makaay, and Van Basten all rolled into one player when he first broke through.

[SincereTheRebel]

You man too busy talking about youtube videos of man wearing makeup. Keep this thread for transfer. Take the weirdo talk to the relationship thread.

Chelski have agreed a deal to sign David Zappacost from torino according to SSN who is an italian right back.

[phonics]

903274272826814464

That's that deal dead then.

Call me ITK

[John]

The bloke on SSN now has been talking and gesticulating wildy for maybe three minutes now and he's made up at least fifteen words in the process, as well as mangling several phrases. Sanchez spent last season 'throning it in', apparently.

Presumably he's killed a couple of youngsters to force a move through.

[Dark Soldier]

We can get our man involved


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMcxUZfcv9Y

Fucking hell who paid for that? :lol:

[John]

'There are only eleven positions in the starting eleven', says our man on SSN. Vital insight.

[Ian]

The bloke on SSN now has been talking and gesticulating wildy for maybe three minutes now and he's made up at least fifteen words in the process, as well as mangling several phrases. Sanchez spent last season 'throning it in', apparently.

Presumably he's killed a couple of youngsters to force a move through.

Is Jim White working himself into a froth?

[phonics]

Fucking hell who paid for that? :lol:

Svn paid someone on fiverr

[SvN]

It came out of the TTH Marketing Budget.

[John]

Is Jim White working himself into a froth?

He hasn't appeared yet. They'll get the Imperial March out and show him arriving like he's Stone Cold for about sevenish I imagine.

The man talking condensed bullshit at the moment is Simon Jordan.

[Ian]

Ah, I forgot that Jim White only came in for the last stretch these days.

[John]

Steve Evans has turned up with a terrific little centre parting come combover.

[igor_balis]

Other than Burke and Krychowiak, both of whom will be new to the league so may well be toss, it's been nothing but punts. Jay Rodriguez missed two full years and was poor last year, Gareth Barry has probably outlived his usefulness in the Premier League, and Kieran Gibbs is rubbish. Hegazy looked alright in his debut, but you're talking about a bloke who's in his mid twenties and has one full season of football in the Egyptian league behind him.

It's only one game in fairness, but I thought Barry looked excellent last weekend, and that kind of tidy, composed midfield performance is definitely one I probably wouldn't have picked up as much had I been watching on the telly. Plus I dunno how much it's worth, but most Everton fans on their message board were actually really disappointed to lose him.

I'm unsure on Rodriguez, but he's looked decent so far. Considering he'll mainly be competition for Rondon up top and for the wingers, he's definitely a useful signing.

Gibbs might be meh, but he's an actual left back, so almost certainly an upgrade on Brunt.

I'm very excited about Krychowiak. I think him and Barry as the CMs (DMs really) could be really excellent in our attritional 4-5-1. I can't believe he won't be an upgrade on Livermore.

[Dark Soldier]

You beautiful bastard SVN

[-james-]

Other than Burke and Krychowiak, both of whom will be new to the league so may well be toss, it's been nothing but punts. Jay Rodriguez missed two full years and was poor last year, Gareth Barry has probably outlived his usefulness in the Premier League, and Kieran Gibbs is rubbish. Hegazy looked alright in his debut, but you're talking about a bloke who's in his mid twenties and has one full season of football in the Egyptian league behind him.

I'll give you Rodriguez, but he'll be worth it if his knees can stop imploding.

You could probably paint most signings as punts if you label anyone from a foreign league as one. These have all been pretty cheap, apart from Burke, and even there it's not a bad price given the his potential. Gibbs is a prime age England international for the price of an egg sandwich.

[phonics]

The excitement on my old mans face as I told him who the Pole that I'm not typing on an iPhone is. He's a WBA forum lurker and immediately jumped for his iPad as I described his time at Sevilla.

He hasn't looked at WBA like that since Kieron Richardson was lifted aloft at the Hawthorns.

Although we all know how it worked out for Borja Valero. He couldn't believe it when I told him what he's up to these days.

[-james-]

Mbappe is done. Mental.

[Mazuuurk]

This Sanchez / Lemar thing seems to be off.

[Yevrah]

Mbappe on loan with the option to buy sounds like the dodgiest deal ever.

PSG are literally pissing in the face of UEFA and FFP.

[Foe]

He hasn't appeared yet. They'll get the Imperial March out and show him arriving like he's Stone Cold for about sevenish I imagine.

The man talking condensed bullshit at the moment is Simon Jordan.

Is he not working on Talksport for this?

[Weaver]

Liverpool and Palace have agreed a £26m fee for Mama Sakho, and he's on the way for a medical.

I suspect van Dijk still isn't joining, but there's some extra money to play with at least.

[Giggles]

£26m for Sakho has just replaced the Johnny Evans rumoured fees as peak current transfer window madness.

[niko_cee]

Will Sanchez be cup tied for the Champions League or can you play in both European competitions in one season? If he's not cup tied I would imagine he'll go to City in January when Arsenal have found someone willing to sign for them to "replace" him.

[Max Power]

Adrien Silva incoming to replace Chelsea bound Drinkwater. Mahrez still whereabouts unknown.

[Mazuuurk]

That will depend on how well they do in the league until then, surely.

After all, they already have Aguero, Jesus, Sane, Sterling, Bernardo Silva, David Silva, Kevin de Bruyne - all who are some sort of attacking players (with the latter two being more midfielders these days I suppose).

[John]

PSG should be back to pissing that league by thirty points. Neymar and Mbappe ought to get ninety goals between them, assuming Mbappe isn't just the greatest ever one season wonder.

[Ian]

Mahrez still whereabouts unknown.

I imagine I'll be disappointed at the last minute but it would be wonderful if he ended up going nowhere.

[phonics]

Will Sanchez be cup tied for the Champions League or can you play in both European competitions in one season? If he's not cup tied I would imagine he'll go to City in January when Arsenal have found someone willing to sign for them to "replace" him.

You can swap Europa League for Champions League but not the other way round.

[John]

Watford have signed 'Molla Wague', who absolutely cannot be a real person.

[Ian]

So have Liverpool not given Southampton any money yet?

[John]

Not unless there was still an active sell on clause on Chamberlain.

It's not for want of trying though.

[Shindig]

Our activity over the summer makes shocking reading. We have no second string.

[Baz]

You man too busy talking about youtube videos of man wearing makeup. Keep this thread for transfer. Take the weirdo talk to the relationship thread.

Chelski have agreed a deal to sign David Zappacost from torino according to SSN who is an italian right back.:D

[Samadini]

Our activity over the summer makes shocking reading. We have no second string.

Don't even have a first choice left back for a couple of months. This season is going to be a proper struggle.

[Weaver]

Our activity over the summer makes shocking reading. We have no second string.

The Sky Sports guy, who's been at Newcastle all day, has upped sticks to Sunderland for the final few hours :D

Surely we're going to sign at least one? Shefki Kuqi on a free?

[Baz]

Is he not working on Talksport for this?He was on 10am til 1pm and was loving every second of it.

[niko_cee]

Not unless there was still an active sell on clause on Chamberlain.

It's not for want of trying though.

About £2.5m I believe.

[Pen]

The Sky Sports guy, who's been at Newcastle all day, has upped sticks to Sunderland for the final few hours :D

Surely we're going to sign at least one? Shefki Kuqi on a free?

You joke, but maybe he'll replace Rafa now that he's been sacked once again.

[niko_cee]

Having thought he was off Sanchez is surely going to be phoning it in to new levels until he's allowed to leave. Whatever happened to that Webster ruling or whatever it was where you could buy yourself out of your contract?

Brighton may have signed a forward, huzzah! Some dude called Babacar or some such from Fiorentina. Nope, me neither. £16m.

[SincereTheRebel]

Someone on here (insert your name for credit) mentioned players have figured out its much better for them to earn 100% of £20m and leave on a free than earn 30% of £70m for the transfer fee. Something like that.

[Yevrah]

Good young freebie in FM, but a quick Wiki shows he's now 24 and has never done anything of note in a top flight league.

[niko_cee]

Sounds great.

My racial prejudice assumes he's going to be quite athletic, which is something I think they are looking for/need.

You have to wonder about City. If they genuinely wanted Sanchez, and were willing to offer £60m for him, why would they fuck about until now and have it go tits up on the basis of Arsenal being bilge?

[Lewis]

It sounds more like just nobbling him to establish their interest for when he can talk to other clubs.

[Adamski]

Someone on here (insert your name for credit) mentioned players have figured out its much better for them to earn 100% of £20m and leave on a free than earn 30% of £70m for the transfer fee. Something like that.

It's better to earn £20m than it is to earn £21m? Nice.

[Offshore Toon]

Babacar will turn out a bit like Okaka at Watford, I imagine. Okaka was an FM don too, right?

Anyway, I forgot to let everybody know about my incredible ITKledge from last week. During Brighton v Barnet you'll never guess which football legend turned up... Glenn Roeder! I thought he was a scout at West Ham, but Wikipedia says he's a "managerial assistant" Stevenage. Its difficult to say which of Barnet's stars he may have been looking at, but expect some action.

[Giggles]

Sky have Given and Lescott on like it's Match of the Day. I'm out.

[Offshore Toon]

SSN has always been shit. Why do people watch it?

[Giggles]

SSN has always been shit. Why do people watch it?

Nobody else covers it.

[CJay]

What's there to cover really? Their list of premier league transfers that keeps popping up at the side of the screen has like six players on it.

I will never get my head around why clubs leave so many important and expensive decisions to the very last minute. Do clubs not make plans for recruitment? Or is it good for 'the brand' to be chasing players on deadline day?