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Thread: Mahow's all new, all new, all new food thread

  1. #4601
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I'm not a huge fan of brownies. They're too dense.

  2. #4602
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Maybe you're too dense.

  3. #4603
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Oh snap.

  4. #4604
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    There is a shop in Hull that does mega brownies like that and they've had to make them smaller (and cheaper fair play lad) because people were bealing that they were 'too much'. No Surrender.

  5. #4605
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I didn't know that 'bealing' was used anywhere other than Scotland.

  6. #4606
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    I used to make super dense brownies and eat them with custard, probably shortened my life considerably but they were damn good.

  7. #4607
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I didn't know it was used beyond Yorkshire, so brownies have brought the Union closer together here. lol at Boyd.

  8. #4608
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Brownies have brought the Union closer together, and now Brexit babies want to end that. Shameful

  9. #4609
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Nigel Slater's brownie recipe on the guardian website is transcendental.

  10. #4610
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    "Transcendental"

    GTFO

  11. #4611
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I don't want it to be transcendental. I want it to be a delicious little heap of chocolatey stodge.

  12. #4612
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    I'm not a huge fan of brownies. They're too dense.
    Then you're getting the wrong ones.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    Maybe you're too dense.
    Or that.

  13. #4613
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    I don't want it to be transcendental. I want it to be a delicious little heap of chocolatey stodge.
    Same thing.

  14. #4614
    Pretty Much Amazing Mike's Avatar
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    Brownies are amazing and @Baz brings shame on the whole family whenever his wrong opinion comes up.

  15. #4615
    Senior Member -james-'s Avatar
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    My girlfriend makes vegan brownies using chia seeds as a replacement for the egg. It sounds like fucking nonsense but they are really pretty special. Incredibly gooey.

  16. #4616
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Surely it's just the amount of chocolate you use and the length of time you bake them for that determines 'gooey-ness'?

  17. #4617
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by niko_cee View Post
    Surely it's just the amount of chocolate you use and the length of time you bake them for that determines 'gooey-ness'?
    I found the way you make the actual mixture makes the difference, the bits of solid chocolate just get lobbed in at the end.

  18. #4618
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    A good brownie needs a decent amount of salt in it too, to offset the sweetness

  19. #4619
    Fuck like you cook.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smjffy View Post
    Any suggestions for a starter special that involves swordfish, chaps?

    Today I'm making marinaded chicken satay skewers with a peanut butter dipping sauce.
    I sold out within two hours.

    Downsides though, I ordered 9cm skewers off Amazon for them and turns out they were much smaller than I anticipated and the one comment that I did get back was that they felt it was a little too salty which I put down to the Soy. I made the marinade then I made the dipping sauce which used the exact same ingredients as the marinade plus the peanut butter. In hindsight I should have coated them in the dip as opposed to serving it in a little pot whilst just char-grilling the skewers as it would have taken away some of the saltiness.

    I didn't find anything for the swordfish and it got thrown out eventually, not too much, thankfully.

  20. #4620
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Surely if push comes to shove you don't do anything fancy with it so much as you just fry it up as a steak or do it in a parcel or something with some seasoning and herbs?

    Just binning it seems a waste.

  21. #4621
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smjffy View Post
    I ordered 9cm skewers off Amazon for them and turns out they were much smaller than I anticipated
    Its a shame there was no way to tell how big they were, before you got them.
    I'm a twit

  22. #4622
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Smiff is famous for over estimating length.

  23. #4623
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    9cm?



    That can't be much bigger than a toothpick.

  24. #4624
    Fuck like you cook.
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    I thought they were 9inch you cunt lol

  25. #4625
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Misty Ricardos Rogan Josh with the topping (didn’t have cherry tomatoes)






  26. #4626
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    There is one round the corner that does impossibly cheap, good quality breakfasts, so I've decided to try their non-breakfast things to see whether it extends to the rest of the menu. The omelette was a disgrace, but their homemade pie and chips was spectacular for six quid or whatever it was.
    I went for cheeseburger and chips today ('All of our burgers are gourmet' - doesn't say what), and it's another winner. If it had been on a board in a pub with some wank salad and a flag stuck in it you would have been paying twelve quid; but because they just dump it on a plate you can have it for six fifty.

  27. #4627
    Senior Member Adamski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    Misty Ricardos Rogan Josh with the topping (didn’t have cherry tomatoes)




    Looks cracking. I did the Bhuna tonight, absolute piece of piss with the base and onion paste already made.

  28. #4628
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    It’s so handy with everything ready. I love that bhuna too, the green pepper comes through so much more than you’d think.

  29. #4629
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    It took me years to appreciate capsicum as a flavour, whether it's completely mild or searing hot. The Mexicans seemed to grasp it centuries ago.

  30. #4630
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Got bored of only having a microwave (fuck the slow cooker) so bought a George Foreman grill as well as a dual electric hob.

    Haven't used the hob yet (need to get pans from the storage locker or just buy another) but it was so good to grill a bit of pork and veg.

  31. #4631
    I used to be funny.
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    What's odder: Only having a microwave or not having a microwave? Because I get some questionable remarks for the latter.

  32. #4632
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Why would you not have a microwave? Admittedly ours gets more use as a makeshift breadbin than as a tool for cooking, but they cost fuck all and they serve a purpose.

  33. #4633
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    What's odder: Only having a microwave or not having a microwave? Because I get some questionable remarks for the latter.
    I only have a microwave because our kitchen isn't done (or any room for that matter) and will be one of the last rooms done in the house.

  34. #4634
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Someone refusing to have a microwave is just being massively pretentious.

  35. #4635
    I used to be funny.
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    The oven was there when I moved in and the stuff I buy has instructions for both. It's not a refusal if I don't necessarily need one.

  36. #4636
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    I don't have one but it's not some lifestyle choice, I never use them so why would I buy one.

  37. #4637
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Oh yeah that's normal enough, no point in going out for something you've never wanted. I meant the twats who SIMPLY COULDN'T have one near them at all.

  38. #4638
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I had one, then it broke, and realized that we didn't really need it, so didn't have one for a few years. Our new apartment has one, so now we have one again, but we have yet to use it.

  39. #4639
    Senior Member -james-'s Avatar
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    My parents are oddballs so the first time I used a microwave was at university. I have one now and I think the only time I use it is to heat up rice.

  40. #4640
    I used to be funny.
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    My parents used theirs religiously. Microwaved bacon is awful. And chicken, too.

  41. #4641
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    They cook bacon and chicken in the microwave?

  42. #4642
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    That can't be serious?

    I only ever used mine for three things:

    1. Rice
    2. Porridge
    3. Chocolate nesquick

  43. #4643
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    Since I moved a couple of months ago, I've coped well enough with a microwave. But they're handy for defrosting, reheating, the odd ready meal, etc. I'm not one for treating it like a replacement for a traditional oven, hobs, and so on. After watching my mum microwave bacon for years and it just looking like flabby er=urghrhrhness, I found that if you microwave streaky bacon and give it a good 3-4 mins, it will crisp up.

  44. #4644
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Stop microwaving bacon you fucking 'spergers.

  45. #4645
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Bacon in the microwave

    Fucking asylum-dwellers.

  46. #4646
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    It actually doesn't do it too badly if you want it quickly. Upside down bowl and drape the rashers across it.

  47. #4647
    I used to be funny.
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    That's the thing. I like bacon with a little crisp to it. The microwave just turns it into a soaked mess. As for chicken, I never got why my parents did that. They did have microwave cookbooks which probably explains it. It doesn't even save time to do it that way. Fucking boomers.

  48. #4648
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Oh yeah, it’s only if you need a quick bit to fire into a omelette or something where it doesn’t matter how it’s cooked. I’m grilling it if I want to eat it as bacon (or frying it if I’ve beans).

    Chicken? No.

  49. #4649
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I had no idea this was even a thing. My whole world view is crumbling.

  50. #4650
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    I tried microwave bacon once.

    It will go crispy if given enough time but it just doesn't taste quite right.

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