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Thread: The All New Jobs Thread

  1. #801
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    No one should ever get off Windows 7.

  2. #802
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    One of my French customers always faxes me his purchase orders, scrawled on lined paper. It really is a confusing way of doing things.

  3. #803
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry View Post
    No one should ever get off Windows 7.
    My PC is on 7. I wish my laptop was, such a superior product.

  4. #804
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    My PC is on 7. I wish my laptop was, such a superior product.
    Same for me.

    7 is so much better.

  5. #805
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    We receive faxes too. Can never understand why in this day and age.

  6. #806
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Not a thing wrong with Windows 10 either.

  7. #807
    I used to be funny.
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    We had handy instructions on our fax machines. Very, very rarely used them.

  8. #808
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Windows 10 is far superior if you actually know how to use it.

  9. #809
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    A new guy has started today in another department; we've just had the manager come round and warn us that because he's a practising Muslim, he won't shake hands with women.

    Top bombing.

  10. #810
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Literally.

  11. #811
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    That’s not being a Muslim, that’s just being a prick.

  12. #812
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    New Illustrator update crashes everytime you lock your computer. Good update. Adobe knocking it out of the park as usual.

  13. #813
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    Just had to come home due to my back being fucked. Asked for painkillers but couldn't give me any due to potential allergies. Cheers, lads, I've got none ya cunts.

  14. #814
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Anyone in here live in Birmingham fancy a pint on Tuesday?

  15. #815
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I'm normally just heading out now but holidays begin today

  16. #816
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    I'm two nights into a 14 night offshore trip and I'm currently 1 pair of boxers down. Put them in to get washed with the rest of my clothes, they did not return.

    Ffs. What kind of shit is that.

  17. #817
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    First sentence had me assuming you'd shat yourself.

  18. #818
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I can't think of anything worse than having to do 14 day stints on an oil rig, even for £850,000 or whatever your salary is.

  19. #819
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I can't think of anything worse than having to do 14 day stints on an oil rig, even for £850,000 or whatever your salary is.
    The ironic thing is that coming to the oil rig is the least profitable part of my job. It's effectively underpaid overtime. Mental.

  20. #820
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    5 interviews and nowhere further forward. Reposting the job advert today. What a fucking pain in the arse.

  21. #821
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Did you not offer the decent pair the job to fight it out? If so, did they see through your plan and reject?

  22. #822
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    They both fell through for different reasons. The one who is relocating has since revealed that her boyfriend (that she's moving with) has found a job 60 miles away, which is where they're going to relocate to. And she also revealed she has an interview in the same city next week. So there's no way I'm hiring her - she'll clearly be looking to get a job closer to home ASAP, so I'm not going to waste my time.

    The other one is just being difficult. I wanted her to do a trial day with us (paid, of course) so she can get an idea of the commute (she lives about an hour away) and we can see how she fits in. She agreed to do it, but couldn't do any of the 8 dates I suggested. She was also taking 2 days to reply to any email, which tells me she's just not that bothered. In the end I just told her to get fucked (in nicer words).

  23. #823
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I thought I was working in a pretty happy, laid-back workplace (although I am insulated from much of it), but a few people have been filling me in on the 'poisonous' atmosphere between the management tiers these past couple of days and lol how have people even got the energy?

  24. #824
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    It really is amazing what wankers worry about.

  25. #825
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    It really is amazing what wankers worry about.
    .

  26. #826
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    I thought I was working in a pretty happy, laid-back workplace (although I am insulated from much of it), but a few people have been filling me in on the 'poisonous' atmosphere between the management tiers these past couple of days and lol how have people even got the energy?
    Every workplace ends up like that. After a while people get bored so you end up having office politics for something to do.

  27. #827
    I used to be funny.
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    I love the savagery of it. Office politics are the best.

  28. #828
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Every workplace ends up like that. After a while people get bored so you end up having office politics for something to do.
    I can see why it happens in normal workplaces, but there is literally no prospect of promotion for anybody here, so it's not like anyone is getting ahead of anyone else. Why would you do it just for its own sake?

  29. #829
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    They're a group of people who spend a lot of time around each other. Factions and grudges are going to develop.

  30. #830
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    I can see why it happens in normal workplaces, but there is literally no prospect of promotion for anybody here, so it's not like anyone is getting ahead of anyone else. Why would you do it just for its own sake?
    Your brother isn't trying to get a promotion either, doesn't stop him being a wank. A large majority of humans are shit. As part of the workforce, get used to it.

  31. #831
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    His life and work are basically the same playing field, so it is 'understandable' with him. Plus I don't think these people are necessarily twats away from work. I find it weird anyway.

  32. #832
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Just wait till someone steals your milk from the fridge.

  33. #833
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    His life and work are basically the same playing field, so it is 'understandable' with him. Plus I don't think these people are necessarily twats away from work. I find it weird anyway.
    You've supremely overestimated humanity. Welcome to the workforce.

  34. #834
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    I've just applied to be a postman.
    I'm a twit

  35. #835
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    office politics are hilarious at my place, everyone is insane. one of my colleagues went behind my managers back and cornered our manger's manager when she was visiting and told her that one of our colleagues was "fucking incompetent" and that she should have her job instead. incredible. said big boss basically just went wtf and immediately told our manager. ace.

  36. #836
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    I've just applied to be a postman.
    There are worse jobs. I was a postie when I was 19 (13 years ago) and it was a pretty sweet gig. You delivered your round as fast as you could, the rest of the day was yours - if someone was sick you might take out another half a round but get paid overtime for a full round. They've stopped that since and you have a fixed finishing time now (2pm I think) but if you live near your round, nothing to stop you going home for a bit to kill some time (not that I need to tell you how to work as little as possible).

    Plus you could pick up extra money by doing collections in the afternoon.

  37. #837
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Pro tip: fill out your ‘you weren’t in’ cards in advance so you don’t have to bother knocking and waiting. My local Postie must save about a week a year pulling that shit.

  38. #838
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    En route to Ipswich and there’s some disgusting fuckers about. How is it possible to be dripping with sweat and stinking of BO at 8:30am. Should have gone by car.

  39. #839
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    First day. Done nothing so far.

  40. #840
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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  41. #841
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I really am fed up with my Irish customers now. It's just a daily Ted and Ralph sketch.

    'Are you ever going to pay for this stuff?'
    'Oi wouldn't know about daht, sir.'

  42. #842
    I used to be funny.
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    Well, the trinity of staying put is complete.

    - Not doing the thing I don't like.
    - More favourable hours next week.
    - Payrise worth over a grand.

    Unions are great.

  43. #843
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Jesus Christ someone who I worked with has topped themselves. Mid 30s two little girls.

  44. #844
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    ^Me in six years if I’m still doing this job.
    I'm a twit

  45. #845
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    After my 5% raise for taking on a new role and 1.5% raise due next month, they’re now offering a 3% raise every year for the next 3 years. BUT anyone accepting it will need to sign a new contract. I expect this is an attempt to get at the Pension / reduce holiday / get rid of sick pay / reduce redundancy amounts / all of the above. We shall see.

  46. #846
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    My last day today before I fly out to the US for a wedding. Absolute mayhem, so much left to get done, phone is ringing off the hook. I doubt I'll actually get any sleep before my flight at 9am tomorrow.

  47. #847
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Where's the wedding?

  48. #848
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    In the US.

  49. #849
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Ah ok sorry, should have picked up on that.

    It's a small country too.

  50. #850
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    It's on the East Coast

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