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Thread: The All New, All Shit, Relationship Thread

  1. #5701
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    Pics

  2. #5702
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    1st norwich tinder date a resounding success tbh.

  3. #5703
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Pics looked good lad. Lots of blacks though.

    Also mine is going well too, she stayed over the other night.

  4. #5704
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    Ayee Magicccc.

  5. #5705
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Guys I'm happy. And I am myself again after a decade. I feel like I've lost that much of my life, in terms of my own personal development. My life begins again now. I spent a year recovering, and now I'm adding so much positivity.

    I am thrilled.

  6. #5706
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Great news Magic!

  7. #5707
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Good news but be careful.

  8. #5708
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Has it been a year since yous split already?

  9. #5709
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Someone ruin his life again for the good of the board.

  10. #5710
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by randomlegend View Post
    Someone ruin his life again for the good of the board.
    It’s a woman he’s talking about. Just give it time, it’s what they do.

  11. #5711
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    even Magic is happy ffs

  12. #5712
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Has it been a year since yous split already?
    Very nearly.

  13. #5713
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    Very nearly.
    Bloody hell. Time flies. Glad to hear you're doing well though.

  14. #5714
    Pretty Much Amazing Mike's Avatar
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    Magic being happy reminded me I never posted, after a year of single life I met a girl lads, she’s boss! First met in the summer and things are going well!
    I’m deffo punching too

  15. #5715
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Domestic violence is not cool.

  16. #5716
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Were you not married? You were probably the only person to describe a divorce as 'ace'.

  17. #5717
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    In relation to divorce. I didn't know the rate was so high. It is at 42% according to the BBC in England and Wales which fucked me right up. If you want to go deeper. Black people dont get married and brown people dont get divorced. That rate would be about 99% if it was just white people.

  18. #5718
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    Were you not married?
    I can't believe I wasn't invited.
    I'm a twit

  19. #5719
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Ah. Maybe it was you.

  20. #5720
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    It should have been The Reid.

  21. #5721
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    Ah. Maybe it was you.
    I am the one with a wife and child.
    Mike is the one who is happy.

    I'm a twit

  22. #5722
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    3 weeks in Norwich, 2 successful tinder dates navigated. She's really smart and cultured and shit, which i'm a big fan of. First date we had long discussions about the future of the union (UK), her Welsh independence arguments v interesting even if I didn't agree, she loves Father Ted and is similarly very disappointed with Linehan being a big transphobe weirdo. Mentioned in passing my recent chess OBSESSION, and rather than being weirded out she insisted on us playing chess on date #2. Aw.

    Date one ended with us pretty battered, snogging and being gross outside some random block of flats. I had my hand up her skirt and shit, like a hormonal teenager. When she was all hehe, but we're in PUBLIC, I laughed and said whatever, I don't live here. Some proper Norwich geezer poked his head out of his window and shouted "Yeah but I do, so FUCK OFF". We both immediately went "ah yeah fair point, sorry mate", or something along those lines.

    Date two I absolutely battered her at chess and had a game of scrabble, but she was being "sensible" and managed to nurse her pint for about 2 hours. Was a bit worried it was going a bit platonic, but probably just cus of how drunk and sloppy we'd been on date one. It ended a lot less depraved, with a quick snog and "thanks for a lovely evening". I'm pretty besotted tbh lads. She's exactly the kind of girl I always fantasised about meeting when I was a dorky teenager, and it turns out they do exist, just not in Rugby.

  23. #5723
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    Sounds great!

    What’s date 3?

  24. #5724
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    He forgot to mention she's a weeb.

  25. #5725
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    There's only 17 people in Norfolk so I probably know her.

  26. #5726
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I can't decide if it's more Partridge series 2 or Gavin and Stacey, but either way the middle paragraph there is a beautiful thing.

  27. #5727
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Modern day Romeo & Juliet.

  28. #5728
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    Well tha'ts nice.

  29. #5729
    I used to be funny.
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    So they're killing themselves after objections from the family? That'll make a good thread.

  30. #5730
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    I hope her name is Annie. Igor + Annie, that sounds nice.

  31. #5731
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    So they're killing themselves after objections from the family? That'll make a good thread.
    I could see it from Igor.

  32. #5732
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    I laughed and said whatever, I don't live here. Some proper Norwich geezer poked his head out of his window and shouted "Yeah but I do, so FUCK OFF".
    That's brilliant.

  33. #5733
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foe View Post
    Sounds great!

    What’s date 3?
    She said it's her turn to pick an activity, so I'm awaiting her decision. I'll be honest, I'm hoping for something involving booze so we can do some tipsy touchy feely but if she wants to go play settlers of Catan or go to some feminist book reading or some shit I'll be happy enough cus like, she's cute.

    And fuck off @Boydy you grass, but not a weeb (that was bumble girl), she's into d&d and scifi and shit, rather than anime.

  34. #5734
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Slippery slope.

  35. #5735
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    Oh, she's one of those.

  36. #5736
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    Oh, she's one of those.
    Aye, but i'm basically one of those as well. I moaned about Rugby being full of normie square girls who didn't know anything, and was desperate to find someone smart and cultured and a bit nerdy. I spend the vast majority of my time when I'm not eating, sleeping or working playing fucking boardgames with my wiener mates, playing online chess and watching pretentious films and TV shows, so it would be a bit much to find this girl and be like "yeah, I wanted exactly THIS, just errr, slightly less of it".

    I like it. I find it cute that for once it's the other person who's slowly revealing their dorky tendencies as trust increases and fear of the other person running a mile slowly subsides.

  37. #5737
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    I so hope she reveals her complete weebness in the next date.

  38. #5738
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    igor had to leave Rugby because the older people at work found out he never invented 'cockwomble'.

  39. #5739
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    igor had to leave Rugby because the older people at work found out he neverinvented 'cockwomble'.
    I feel like I successfully left #teamsensitive (ish) once I learned to take your bantz in the spirit they were intended but you fucking take that back. Honestly not sure I hate anything more than those cutesy compound swearwords. Was always a big fan of Charlie Brooker circa-early screenwipe, but he couldn't go more than 10 minutes without calling some tv producer a twatwank or something. Hideous. I also had a mate at school who tried to steal his whole shtick, but didn't manage anything except making up his own horrible swearwords and wearing a t shirt with a blazer.

    I remember one the best ever E-Victories i saw was my mate making a fairly tongue-in-cheek insult on this fit girl's profile picture on facebook, to which she responded "ah, [my mate's name], like charlie brooker without the humour or the charm". Especially funny cus it was clearly said without a shred of cheeky bantz, it was fucking brutal. Either way, fuck you mate.

  40. #5740
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry View Post
    I so hope she reveals her complete weebness in the next date.
    I feel like she's too obsessed with Welsh culture to have time for Japanese culture.

  41. #5741
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Rumbled by a Stephen Fry meme of a quote he never even said going round the office chat. Somebody a bit smoother would have just slowly switched to 'shitgibbon', but you I heard you cracked like a mess.

  42. #5742
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Stop putting him on the ropes, he's found happiness.

  43. #5743
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Stop triggering me

  44. #5744
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Text your lass a picture of some shit basic cheese on toast and tell her you're having their national dish.

  45. #5745
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Vegetable munge is the national dish of Wales.

  46. #5746
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Text your lass a picture of some shit basic cheese on toast and tell her you're having their national dish.
    I had rarebit in the cafe attached to the Dylan Thomas museum in Laugharne, the tiny village where he wrote a lot of his stuff. I don't disagree with you.

  47. #5747
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    Aye, but i'm basically one of those as well.
    To be honest I expected you to reply "What do you mean" and then I was gonna say "I was honestly just shitposting I meant nothing by it whatsoever" but I'm very happy for you it sounds wonderful

  48. #5748
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    To be honest I expected you to reply "What do you mean" and then I was gonna say "I was honestly just shitposting I meant nothing by it whatsoever" but I'm very happy for you it sounds wonderful
    thanks, friend.

    definitely trying to temper my excitement, cus it's so early days. she could deffo just be like "actually, nah mate", at any point and it would be absolutely fair enough, but i'm not usually like this. think there was a couple of times i expressed enthusiasm for tinder girls on here, but deep down it was just momentary surprise a girl fancied me, and wanting there to be something. feels like there actually is something this time. okay i'll shut up now, sorry gang.

  49. #5749
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    You're in the entirely right place to go on about it don't apologize.

    If it wasn't for living vicariously through everyone else's happiness I'd have none at all

    But hey Igor really you're a good lad and you deserve to be happy so don't go ballsing it up on some "Aw man I can't believe this!" type of stuff because you're gonna get in your own head and start acting out of sorts.

    Remember you're a catch yourself and she should be thrilled to have met YOU just the same.

  50. #5750
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Yeah, if she's as much of a geek as you make out then you should be alright.

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