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Thread: The All New Jobs Thread

  1. #2101
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    A few years ago I turned down a job I was offered through a recruiter and they were livid. They acted as if I actually owed them something, the silly twats.

  2. #2102
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I've had the same. I told him the commute was too much for me (over the dartford crossings twice a day at rush hour). The hours advertised were the 'building hours' so I was under the impression the role was outside of rush hour, only to be told at the interview that it was 9-5. That can add an hour to the journey each way. No chance.

    He sat on Google maps reading me the commute time (for 11am on a Tuesday) and gave me a roasting for it. Cunt.

  3. #2103
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Any reason you didn't just hang up?

  4. #2104
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    I genuinely think that recruitment as an industry will largely die in the next decade. There'll be an Uber/Purple Bricks equivalent that employers will start using instead.

    I spoke to a recruiter recently about hiring someone. They wanted 20% of their annual salary and if they worked for me for more than 4 weeks, I'd not get a penny back. It's an absolute con.

  5. #2105
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Recruiters are just salesmen under a different name, and if a salesman loses a sale he thought he had then he will a) seethe and b) claw desperately to recover it.

  6. #2106
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SvN View Post
    I genuinely think that recruitment as an industry will largely die in the next decade. There'll be an Uber/Purple Bricks equivalent that employers will start using instead.

    I spoke to a recruiter recently about hiring someone. They wanted 20% of their annual salary and if they worked for me for more than 4 weeks, I'd not get a penny back. It's an absolute con.
    This won't work everywhere but the firm I work for currently push the refer a friend scheme really hard. They give you a grand if a referral pass probation, which is a good chunk, but is a hell of a lot less than they'd pay a recruiter. We must get things out every month or other month about referring people.

  7. #2107
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    How many TTHers have you referred?

  8. #2108
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SvN View Post
    I genuinely think that recruitment as an industry will largely die in the next decade. There'll be an Uber/Purple Bricks equivalent that employers will start using instead.

    I spoke to a recruiter recently about hiring someone. They wanted 20% of their annual salary and if they worked for me for more than 4 weeks, I'd not get a penny back. It's an absolute con.
    There's already some places a bit like that.

  9. #2109
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    How many TTHers have you referred?
    I just sent them a link to the members' list.

    I've got high hopes for Pharad.

  10. #2110
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    I just sent them a link to the members' list.

    I've got high hopes for Pharad.
    He's clearly got experience in sales.

  11. #2111
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    This won't work everywhere but the firm I work for currently push the refer a friend scheme really hard. They give you a grand if a referral pass probation, which is a good chunk, but is a hell of a lot less than they'd pay a recruiter. We must get things out every month or other month about referring people.
    Yep, some industries need recruitment - my friend is a recruiter who works in a very specialist field, but there's no way you need a recruiter to find kitchen staff earning £17k per year.

  12. #2112
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    Any reason you didn't just hang up?
    I wanted an interview for a different job.

  13. #2113
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I'm drinking free pints on the company, for once work is not shit.

  14. #2114
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    It will be in the morning.

  15. #2115
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Early bed as I'll be driving to a job first thing unfortunately. The boss would near be offended if I didn't have a few, so happy to oblige. He gave out to me on the phone one evening before because I wasn't going to charge a few.

  16. #2116
    I used to be funny.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    https://www.caterer.com/job/bar-mana...medium=organic

    Just one snippet from this mesmerising train-wreck of a job ad:


    Fuck off.
    WE CONNECT WITH THAT AGELESS MILLENNIAL MINDSET
    That's not ageless. You're aiming specifically for people of a certain age.

  17. #2117
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Classic Shindig.

  18. #2118
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    Trying to download CV to laptop. MS Word trial has expired. Don't wish to pay. Any top tips?

  19. #2119
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Can you save it as a PDF? Way better format to send a CV in anyway.

  20. #2120
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mellberg View Post
    Trying to download CV to laptop. MS Word trial has expired. Don't wish to pay. Any top tips?
    https://www.libreoffice.org/

  21. #2121
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Or google docs actually, I'd forgot that.

    I'd still save and send as a pdf though.

  22. #2122
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    Thanks, but I don't wish to come across as Jeremy Corbyn to any prospective employers.

    @ Boyd

    Edit: TBF I could save libre as pdf and send that. Thanks lads.
    Last edited by Mellberg; 06-06-2019 at 08:27 PM.

  23. #2123
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    Open it in Google docs then save it as a PDF. Noone at my place bothers with word anymore.

  24. #2124
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mellberg View Post
    Thanks, but I don't wish to come across as Jeremy Corbyn to any prospective employers.

    @ Boyd

    Edit: TBF I could save libre as pdf and send that. Thanks lads.
    What?

  25. #2125
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Was working from home today. Got asked via IM by annoying manager if I would be willing to travel for work. I asked where to and for how long. She said that wasn't the question so I said well then the answer is 'it depends'.

    Then she sent an email to everyone asking about their willingness and ability to travel and any reasons they have for not wanting to travel. She then sent me an IM saying to consider it and respond as per the email. I asked if we could talk about it tomorrow in person (intending to tell them I'd taken the job offer elsewhere) and she was like 'no - I need it today for X' so I was just like "I'm quittin', how'd'ya like them apples?".

    Gotta discuss it in a meeting tomorrow morning though. Not looking forward to that.

  26. #2126
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    What did you really say?
    I'm a twit

  27. #2127
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Was working from home today. Got asked via IM by annoying manager if I would be willing to travel for work. I asked where to and for how long. She said that wasn't the question so I said well then the answer is 'it depends'.

    Then she sent an email to everyone asking about their willingness and ability to travel and any reasons they have for not wanting to travel. She then sent me an IM saying to consider it and respond as per the email. I asked if we could talk about it tomorrow in person (intending to tell them I'd taken the job offer elsewhere) and she was like 'no - I need it today for X' so I was just like "I'm quittin', how'd'ya like them apples?".

    Gotta discuss it in a meeting tomorrow morning though. Not looking forward to that.
    That's a pretty shitty attitude to give the place that offered you an entry to the industry, no?

  28. #2128
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I didn't actually say the last part. I just told her (politely) that I had accepted another job offer and would be leaving soon so it was probably best not to factor me into any travel for work.

    Also let's not make out like they did me some kind of favour by giving me a job like I was some charity case. They weren't the only offer I had at the time.

  29. #2129
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    That's a pretty shitty attitude to give the place that offered you an entry to the industry, no?
    There was only one shitty attitude in that and it wasn't from Boydy.

  30. #2130
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    That's a pretty shitty attitude to give the place that offered you an entry to the industry, no?
    Is it fuck. The only sensible answer to 'would you be willing to travel for work' is 'how far and for how long?'. If they get shitty about you wanting to base your decision on whether you're travelling to the next town or to fucking Australia then that's on them. Fuck 'em.

  31. #2131
    I used to be funny.
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    It's a contingency thing, by the sounds of it. They asked us the same questions years back.

  32. #2132
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Got rid of my fuel benefit today, so that should save me about 250 quid a month in tax. I have to pay for my own fuel now but don't do that much personal mileage.

  33. #2133
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    Is it fuck. The only sensible answer to 'would you be willing to travel for work' is 'how far and for how long?'. If they get shitty about you wanting to base your decision on whether you're travelling to the next town or to fucking Australia then that's on them. Fuck 'em.
    1) The reply was based on something he now says he made up.

    2) Even in that scenario. It's the way you say how far and how long.

  34. #2134
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Jesus christ, do you want me to post a transcript

  35. #2135
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I'm convinced Phonics is autistic.

  36. #2136
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I thought it would be obvious the last line wasn't what I actually said. I'm a big fanny, I hate confrontation.

  37. #2137
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    Travel as in part of the job or travel as in we're re-locating to China.

  38. #2138
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    I got offered the job I interviewed for last week. Chuffed all around, cuts out 2 hours of driving every day and the role seems fairly interesting.

    Now for the awkward part of handing my notice in at my current place.

  39. #2139
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Binning off a shit commute.

    That's the dream.

  40. #2140
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thommo View Post
    Now for the awkward part of handing my notice in at my current place.
    The adrenaline from that is hard to match.
    I'm a twit

  41. #2141
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    Binning off a shit commute.

    That's the dream.


    I've done about 50,000 miles in just under 2 years driving up and down that same stretch of M4. My car will be glad of the respite too.

    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    The adrenaline from that is hard to match.
    You weren't wrong there. Heart was racing! I feel a little bad, as I like the guys I work with here but the job move is a no-brainer really.

  42. #2142
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    When moving from my last job to this one was the only time I've put in my notice (a few years before that I'd had a shit job where a fixed-term contract was ending and they wanted me to sign a new one but refusing to do so wasn't quite the same) but the place had gone to shit so it was a good feeling and I couldn't wait to have the new one confirmed so I could do it.

    As an added bonus our idiot hag of a senior manager never spoke to me for basically any of my last month after that so it was a win on all fronts.

  43. #2143
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Was working from home today. Got asked via IM by annoying manager if I would be willing to travel for work. I asked where to and for how long. She said that wasn't the question so I said well then the answer is 'it depends'.

    Then she sent an email to everyone asking about their willingness and ability to travel and any reasons they have for not wanting to travel. She then sent me an IM saying to consider it and respond as per the email. I asked if we could talk about it tomorrow in person (intending to tell them I'd taken the job offer elsewhere) and she was like 'no - I need it today for X' so I was just like "I'm quittin', how'd'ya like them apples?".

    Gotta discuss it in a meeting tomorrow morning though. Not looking forward to that.
    Good stuff. I fucking live for the bullshit pettiness. What kind of mega-spaz expects you to volunteer for travel when you don't know where/how long for?

    btw - she was obviously trying to shaft you - probably getting you to ship out to India/Kiev and train up some outsource people who'd replace your entire team

  44. #2144
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    Quote Originally Posted by Raoul Duke View Post
    Good stuff. I fucking live for the bullshit pettiness. What kind of mega-spaz expects you to volunteer for travel when you don't know where/how long for?

    btw - she was obviously trying to shaft you - probably getting you to ship out to India/Kiev and train up some outsource people who'd replace your entire team
    @mahow job for you mate.

  45. #2145
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Officially resigned now. Got the offer letter from the new place yesterday and felt a bit sad about leaving and that. But then spoke to one of the guys who started around the same time as me (he's been looking out too) and he said he was getting shit from that same manager about not wanting to travel so definitely feel I'm making the right move again now.

  46. #2146
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    I fucking hate printers. There's no one job full of more gatekeeping and more incompetentcy, I swear.

    I'm being told that they won't print my flyer because one of the circles is RGB. I sent them this screenshot.



    Still RGB according to this idiot. I haven't had this issue with any printer in my 4 years here. I hate them all.

  47. #2147
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Turns out some people think switching their monitor off counts as locking their computer when they’re away from their desk.
    I'm a twit

  48. #2148
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    I fucking hate printers. There's no one job full of more gatekeeping and more incompetentcy, I swear.

    I'm being told that they won't print my flyer because one of the circles is RGB. I sent them this screenshot.



    Still RGB according to this idiot. I haven't had this issue with any printer in my 4 years here. I hate them all.
    Daily Mash: Science less than a decade away from fully operational printer

  49. #2149
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    I'm talking about an actual human being here. Fucking useless. I sent exactly the same pdf back to her and now it's CMYK. Fucking bitch. They live to annoy designers.

  50. #2150
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Why did it matter that it was supposedly RGB? Shouldn't they still be able to print it?

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