Our lot now want one mental health first aider for every ten members of staff.
I know a guy...
We had a new guy start in August as a designer. He's got plenty of experience, but his work was very "good, not great". But there was enough there to suggest he could become very good with the right guidence.
3 months later he's absolutely hopeless. His work is abysmal, and he works at a snail's pace. He's also got a really wierd habbit of sending instant messages over Discord as if they were an email - including a "Kind regards" sign off on every message. After a few days of seeing how the rest of us communicate, I thought he would've realised by now. What makes it worse is that he seems to spend between 5 and 10 minutes typing these messages out every time you ask him a simple question.
He had his review 2 weeks ago where I outlined all of the ways he was underperforming, but he's getting worse, if anything. He's somehow managed to get even slower, to the point where a client has complained to me this morning. Sadly, he's going to have to go.
He's a nice enough guy, but the sort of personality that I couldn't be around socially for more than 5 minutes. Think Ned Flanders with a Brummie accent.
Yeah, he sounds like a right nightmare.
I don't get people doing unconventional things over work communication mediums, there are established norms for this shit that make all our lives easier and whether it's sending every email high importance or removing the 're:' from every email you reply to, just stop it.
Is he old? He sounds old. You shouldn't employ the old. Age discrimination laws be damned.
We've a lady going on maternity leave that has sent out the obligatory "thank you for my pressies!" Email. Fine.
Less fine are the 4 people that decided "reply all" was the correct way to respond with "Enjoy " and "get some sleep while you can!!!!".
These are the worst people in the world.
At the same time I do think "reply to all" should be "hidden" a bit more, just so the simpletons don't have immediate access to it.
"Birmingham Screwdrivers"
There should be a way of removing yourself as a CC. Maybe some clients can, but I've never been able to in Outlook.
I've just stumbled upon a pretty major fuck up by one of my colleagues. I can't ignore it, because it will be obvious I've seen it when it comes to light. But I really don't want to get him in trouble because he's a good bloke and normally a good worker too. That said, he's cost the company 8 grand and it's not even fixable.
Eugh.
We have a new-ish person who you can see in real time trying not to do what he is meant to be doing because he regrets taking the job but can't just leave. It's pretty impressive in its own way. I didn't know there were that many staff dial-ins and interview volunteer opportunities, but he seems to fill half the week with those, and then a large part of what remains can be filled eating and doing 'admin'.
Hard to say, it's a pretty major fuck up. He's been sitting on a load of paperwork, not turned up to atleast 1 court hearing and not updated his calendar so no cunt even knew anything was happening.
I've dropped it in his lap for now in the hope that he comes clean and I don't have to get involved.
Yeah, when stuff like that happens with the guy who sits next to me (which it does reasonably often) I just go over and say listen, old boy, thing is, I've just noticed... and that seems to do the trick.
Baz would send a polite heads up email, and BCC in the company owner.
Should go full Lee and burn him in the hope of getting up a rung.
If he has a brain (currently in some doubt) he will go straight to the Head of Department, which will;
A) Make it look like he's taking it really seriously,
B) Make him look properly sorry
C) Rob our manager of the opportunity to go nuclear, flap about, call a load of meetings and guarantee the worst possible outcome for all.
Our Head of Department is most likely to just pull a face, invite him to close the door and just give him a bit of a telling off if she can.
Always best to confess than digging. We've had the shitstorm recently and rather than point fingers (like the other side), went with the timeline of events and tried to be objective. Better to just figure out how the fuck up happened rather than hide it so you can actually learn.
Yeah, we have accountability like that in our place. Although you still get plenty of people who baulk at the idea of telling them. People need to know when and how they are fucking up.
The thrill of fucking up.
I've yet to trip up in my new career. Back in the Banking days I probably had a clanger/near miss each quarter.
Genuinely the same. I thought he posted it about 4 weeks ago.
Equally someone shouldn't be little scouse grass when they're up to their elbows in shit they could do time for.
What's your Glassdoor rating?
Glassdoor rating? We're a company of 10 people that hires someone new about once every 18 months.
To be fair 2 of the last 4 have been awful. It's a lot harder than you think, I absolutely hate recruitment.
It's like dating. Most of the non-useless people are already taken.
How many of the other nine are you sleeping with?
We're the same. The last 3 hires have been complete mongs, 4 if you include me.
It must be a nightmare to be fair. It doesn't help that the honest and hard working people you want are also usually the least likely to sell themselves at an interview.
Where as useless and unscrupulous cunts will say whatever it takes to get the job. Sadly, it works all the way up to Prime Minister.
I should be in recruitment really, I can see through all the cunts. Beware anyone with either really good or really bad social skills.
It's all either Liverpool or Manchester round there.
After the pregnant woman couldn't take the job at our place, they offered it to somebody who asked if he could work under a false name. He threatened to write to Buckingham Palace unless we let him, so presumably somebody there is having to go through the motions of responding to that.
Still enjoying my current role and finding it much easier to get up so early, I do tend to finish earlier than I expected too as I just fly through my prep and so I've agreed to do six days a week instead so I don't lose too many hours. Chef is a fan which is nice, he likes the fact I always ask my team mates if they need any help before I do sod off but there is a small part of me that misses actually cooking. He did offer me to do the odd evening here and there to see how things run once I'm gone but tbh I'm feeling heavy eyed by time 1pm arrives so I want to shoot home for my powernap and mixing hours to that extent will screw my body up, I feel.
I don't like the fact it is monthly pay but I'm sure when I get it next week that'll change and I can move my outgoings etc to one particular day, I love the amount of free time I get, home by 1.30/2pm the latest so can chill for 7/8 hours before trying to crash. It doesn't always work and sometimes find myself up gone midnight (damn FM!) but easy enough to catch up on lost sleep the following day, I guess.
I'm thinking this might just be suitable for the next six months or so, get Christmas out the way, power through until May/June then launch myself into a busier environment having used the time to push ahead on a personal level. Not that I am doing that all too much lately, in fact its been work, home, FM, make tea, watch film/doc then crash but given last summer, I can't say I don't need it. Mentally I didn't realise how it was getting to me, physically I feel like a new man but I think that's due to the routine of having a decent-ish sleep pattern. Job before this I'd be rolling in gone 10/11pm, still switched on thinking I forgot things, crash by 2/3am then back in at 8am to repeat. It was just no life.
If we have (not sure if likely or not) another lockdown of sorts then I'm definitely going to pursue a different career so I think it makes sense to use the next few months as an opportunity to lay the blueprint down for whatever that may be. Problem is, other than working with vulnerable adults which is rewarding and something I loved, it does meddle with my own mental health and cooking is something I didn't realise I was 'good' at, or less so good and more passionate, less so passionate more so competent? I dunno. Just feel like there is something I should be doing that I'm not doing. The campaigning last year for example opened myself up to things I would never have dreamed of doing and without sounding arrogant or big headed, I absolutely smashed it and surprised myself.
I didn't follow through with joining Plaid Cymru as once I returned to work the political side of things sort of got put on the back burner but I do feel like something is missing. How do I find out what that is?
Tranny alley in Amsterdam.
If I wanted dick, I'd probably quote you more often but as it is, that sort of shit can wait until one hits rock bottom as you just never know what turn I'll take in life. Ha!
You're giving off major Spacey in American Beauty vibes recently.