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Thread: Mahow's all new, all new, all new food thread

  1. #3701
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    That actually looks like Spoonsky through one of them fat filters.

  2. #3702
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    he's alive but has been confined to a wheelchair since his stroke 3 years ago, and has spent the whole time since writing his absolutely insane philosophy book/memoirs. i have to be really nice about it whenever i see him because i'm worried he'd top himself if he realised what he's dedicated three years of his life to possibly won't "totally shake up western civilisation" as he claimed it would.

    i might put a couple of screenshots on here.

  3. #3703
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    There's no might about it.

    It's that kind of depressing hilarity that the board has been crying out for. My dead parents have been carrying us for too long.

  4. #3704
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Alright, so the first bit is pretty good, just some anecdotes about the old days at west brom:

    Toggle Spoiler






    This bit though, er, yeah:

    Toggle Spoiler

  5. #3705
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I can see where you get it from.

  6. #3706
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Enoch Powell was not the MP for Smethwick. I would wind the visits down if I were you.

  7. #3707
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I can see where you get it from.
    100%

  8. #3708
    I used to be funny.
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    15 minutes. That's all it took to find this stuff, bring it to our attention and then willingly post it. In the fucking food thread.

  9. #3709
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    The only problem here is that this doesn't have it's own thread with the whole 'book' in it.
    Last edited by Spikey M; 04-03-2019 at 07:43 AM.

  10. #3710
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    You can buy it. As my dad says, 'once it gets a cult following on the kindle the publishers will come to me'

  11. #3711
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I guy I used to work with has "books" on Amazon. They're theoretically about his depression and depression in general but in practice they're just a tedious stream of consciousness about his life. But, like, the yawnsome minutiae. "Our shift patterns at the time were 8-4 or 10-6 (or was it 11-7??)" Grim stuff.

    Also, to deviate onto the tangent of food for a moment, just had leftover spring rolls. Breakfast of champions.

  12. #3712
    Senior Member Mazuuurk's Avatar
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    It reminds me of those old letters that Jack the Ripper wrote, somehow.

  13. #3713
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    My grandad wrote a book about his "war days" when I was a kid. He was obsessed with it for years, and from what I remember, it was total shite. He'd bring the 200 page manuscript around and sit there expecting family members to read the entire thing there and then in front of him.

    He didn't speak to me for about 6 months because he gave it me to read one day and I had football training, and left without finishing it. I was about 12.

  14. #3714
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Sounds like you were being pretty selfish, to be fair.

  15. #3715
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Are you now a "professional footballer"? No.
    Could you have been "grandson of esteemed wartime author"? Yes, if you didn't have delusions of grandeur making you such a selfish child.
    I'm a twit

  16. #3716
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Shameful, that man fought a war for you.

  17. #3717
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    Well he's dead now, so needless to say, I had the last laugh.

  18. #3718
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    My friend's mum said my book was 'boring', and now she's got cancer, so...

  19. #3719
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    My friend's mum said my book was 'boring', and now she's got cancer, so...
    It gave her cancer? Not quite the cover quote you want.

  20. #3720
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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  21. #3721
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    This page has been a corker.
    I'm a twit

  22. #3722
    Senior Member Alan Shearer The 2nd's Avatar
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    Anyone got a sous vide machine?

    I've only just found out you get smaller ones to sit in a pot as opposed to the large ones that have the built-in water bath. Not cheap but seem very convenient and you'd never overcook a piece of meat again-

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/...ec3e7b34ccdd27

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01MZ6Q4...0-85c3a5c63f09

  23. #3723
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Wouldn't you need a vacpac machine/device to sit alongside that?

    Although I guess that would apply to a water bath one as well.

    They've always seemed to be to be things that, whilst it would be nice to have, are a bit of a pointless/unnecessary faff. In a similar vein to a deep fat fryer.

  24. #3724
    Senior Member Alan Shearer The 2nd's Avatar
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    I wouldn't say it was a faff, just fill a pot with water, heat it with the machine, chuck your meat in a bag and done. You can just use normal zip-lock bags too.

    Deep fat fryer definitely a bit of a faff to keep around though I'd agree. Although I would love to make my own fish and chips.

  25. #3725
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    What I mean is, by and large, successfully cooking a bit of meat by conventional means isn't that hard. Perhaps the result might not be quite as good (as with the fryer making fried things better) but it seems a big outlay for a marginal gain (I have no idea what difference one of these devices might make).

    Unless you eat 3 steaks a day and are very particular about exactly how you like them.

  26. #3726
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    This was so much nicer than it looks


  27. #3727
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Not saying much given it looks like the aftermath of a children's home having burned to the ground.

  28. #3728
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Not the analogy I'd use for something that looks great, but we can't all be children people.

  29. #3729
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    That does look great. Chips look perfect.

    Why is it in a pizza box?

  30. #3730
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Not sure. One place does it in a box like a snackbox but it's definitely nicer spread out like that in the pizza one.

  31. #3731
    Senior Member Adamski's Avatar
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    That’s the game

  32. #3732
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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  33. #3733
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Seen that floating about Facebook the last while. Is it fake? I find it hard to believe nobody figured that out until 2019.

  34. #3734
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I saw that the other day. But then I saw them trying it on Sunday Brunch today and it didn't seem as easy as that video makes out.

  35. #3735
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    It would have to be incredibly ripe surely.

  36. #3736
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    And you need two sets of arms.

  37. #3737
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Apparently pulling at the leaves is a good way to know ripeness in a shop.

    Then again, they come tinned so there's very little need for any faff.

  38. #3738
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It works but the riper it is the better.

  39. #3739
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Filthy hangover casserole time




  40. #3740
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Holy shit that looks immense

  41. #3741
    Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuno Reg's Avatar
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    That looks good. Casseroles are pretty great. You get the enjoyable part of cooking (preparation IMO, so chopping and that) without having to faff about or stress over timings etc.

    Is that a tomatoey sauce, Giggles?

  42. #3742
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reg View Post
    That looks good. Casseroles are pretty great. You get the enjoyable part of cooking (preparation IMO, so chopping and that) without having to faff about or stress over timings etc.

    Is that a tomatoey sauce, Giggles?
    No, just a couple of tablespoons of tomato puree when I was frying off the chicken and onions. The main sauce is water, chicken stock, and a thick base I always have at hand that's made with onions, garlic, peppers, courgettes, and carrots. Saves using anything else to thicken it.

  43. #3743
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    It looks good but I'd need something greasier if I was hungover.

  44. #3744
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    It looks good but I'd need something greasier if I was hungover.
    I had the grease while I was still drunk last night.

  45. #3745
    Senior Member Samadini's Avatar
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    Looks class that, Giggs.

  46. #3746
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I trust you had 3 or 4 slices of bread and butter to mop up afterwards?

  47. #3747
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I wish. Only have some porridge and yogurt loaf and wouldn't fancy it.

  48. #3748
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Aye that looks grand, Giggles, so it does.

  49. #3749
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I bought a jar of pickled chillies today and I am bang in trouble. I have no idea what type of chillies they are but I can't feel my fucking face. And yet, I can't stop eating them.

  50. #3750
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Oh my God.

    Make it stop.

    Make me stop.

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