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Thread: The House Thread

  1. #1301
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Is that Phil Neville's new gaff?

  2. #1302
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luke Emia View Post
    Not to supplement the property deposit but you can use it to pay the stamp duty.
    What's stopping me from doing the former? Can't I move money from the credit card to mybank account to pay the deposit?

    Along the lines of Kiko's new pad:


  3. #1303
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Good for those who want to watch people having a piss.

  4. #1304
    I used to be funny.
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    "I'm trying to watch Coronation Street but someone's in the shower."

  5. #1305
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    Quote Originally Posted by Don View Post
    What's stopping me from doing the former? Can't I move money from the credit card to mybank account to pay the deposit?

    Along the lines of Kiko's new pad:

    No the banks get pissy about it. A family member could and could gift you the money as long as the lender is ok with a gifted deposit. But you can’t do it yourself.

    Only bank that will let you borrow money for the deposit is Santander.

  6. #1306
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    I see, I can't recall the order of the steps but I presume they'll be able to spot how I've paidthe deposit before approving the mortgage then. Fair. Anyone got any cash-in-hand jobs going?

  7. #1307
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Don View Post
    What's stopping me from doing the former? Can't I move money from the credit card to mybank account to pay the deposit?

    Along the lines of Kiko's new pad:

    Did you see this one doing the rounds a few weeks ago? It's about as big as a disabled toilet.

  8. #1308
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    It's the idea of someone attempting lockdown in them that really makes it for me. Probably why they're available on the market again.

  9. #1309
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Would you hang yourself off the bed or the shower frame?

  10. #1310
    I used to be funny.
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    I wouldn't trust anything to hold a person's weight. Your best bet is to find a staircase to fall down.

  11. #1311
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    I've got some brown interior wooden doors I wanted to paint but ive been told by multiple people that it isnt as straight forward as painting walls. Ive been told to use wood oil, but even then it may not work.

  12. #1312
    Senior Member Andy's Avatar
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    It's easy enough you just need the right paint.

    You'll need to sand them back first to get a key for the paint, then q coat of oil based undercoat and then one or two coats of satin or gloss. Get a mini roller kit and they dont take long.

  13. #1313
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    *eggshell > satin/gloss
    I'm a twit

  14. #1314
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Am I a dickhead buying a flat now? I can convince myself RATIONALLY that I'm not (both generally and in reference to this quite excellent flat), but there is this little part of me that wants to hold off. That said, it could just be that the most expensive thing I've ever bought is a laptop, so hooking myself onto something like this is a bit unusual.

  15. #1315
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Never ever buy a flat.

  16. #1316
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Houses are a bit expensive around here.

  17. #1317
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Given the admittedly limited amount I can glean about your personality from this forum I feel like a flat would be incompatible with your personality, neighbourwise.

  18. #1318
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    A proper man needs some sort of a yard and you seem like a proper man. Penthouses and instagram window box herbs is Keeks territory.

  19. #1319
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Am I a dickhead buying a flat now? I can convince myself RATIONALLY that I'm not (both generally and in reference to this quite excellent flat), but there is this little part of me that wants to hold off. That said, it could just be that the most expensive thing I've ever bought is a laptop, so hooking myself onto something like this is a bit unusual.
    I take it you've got a job nowadays then? Did your thesis on Random McRandom cold war nuclear bomb geez open up lots of doors for you or have you ended up working in a call centre?

    I think flats depend on how lucky you get. Lived in one for a couple of years and it was great. Personally id never actually buy a place where i don't own the freehold.

  20. #1320
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I post here professionally.

  21. #1321
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I'd wait a while. Can see pirces falling a fair bit when loads of people lose their jobs after furlough ends/their employers decide they don't want to reduce their hours and pay them for work they're not doing under that new scheme.

    Also, let's see the gaff?

  22. #1322
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Also wait for the impact of Brexit on the economy. Next year's gonna be a shitstorm.

  23. #1323
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    My thinking is that flats can only really go so low around here (most crowded city in the country) before nobody is selling or lending (and the person I'm buying off is another civil servant, so they won't be desperate any time soon), so, whilst I could maybe wait and save another five per cent, why risk it?

  24. #1324
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    If the covid brexit spitroast of the economy is a tenth as bad as forecasted a lot of landlords will be holding firesales shortly, never mind those who are mortgaged to the hilt.

  25. #1325
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Possibly, but who is going to be offering mortgages under those conditions?

  26. #1326
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    My purchase is still being dragged out too and normally I'd be pissed but I really don't think it's wise to move till January at least. The only thing pressing us to act is the stamp duty issue and even then, give it till last couple of months to see if everyone goes in some mad frenzy or what. If we don't see signs of the apocalypse in Jan, we'll purchase. If not, you imagine a considerable crash worthy of waiting for. The lending issue is the point. If you've got the cushion, fine, if you're on the edge of the LTV limits, go.

  27. #1327
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Possibly, but who is going to be offering mortgages under those conditions?
    Presumably you've got 15% at the minute if you're considering buying now and if you can save another 5%, I don't think it'd be that difficult to get a mortgage with 20% deposit in 6 months time.

  28. #1328
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Buy a house with Manc Sean.

  29. #1329
    Senior Member Andy's Avatar
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    On one hand it's a good time to buy and lock in the low rates and stamp duty savings but on the other hand everything is taking an absolute age at the moment.

    Buying a house in the current situation is a complete nightmare, way more stressful than when I bought my first house.

    As for price rises and falls, who knows really. It's such an unknown with Brexit. I've never really known house prices to fall at all around here. We are planning on staying in the house we are buying for hopefully 20+ years so any drops shouldn't be too much of an issue.
    Last edited by Andy; 26-09-2020 at 07:04 AM.

  30. #1330
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    The downstairs flat is now for sale.

    Here is what the whole house looked like before:

    https://www.rightmove.co.uk/property...-74933369.html

    And the bottom flat now:

    https://www.rightmove.co.uk/property...-98017304.html

  31. #1331
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Do we get buddy price? Heard that Lewis is looking for a place.

  32. #1332
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    And I thought Portsmouth was expensive.

  33. #1333
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    And I thought Portsmouth was expensive.
    Hitchin is crazy expensive as so many Londoners have moved here. 30 minute trains to King Cross and a nice area has seen it shoot up.

  34. #1334
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I don't recall it being 'lovingly re-furbished', but then 'repeatedly donned by the builders over' might not sell.

  35. #1335
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Woke up this morning to find the door to my gas meter open, definitely wasn't open yesterday. It is under my car port, can't see it having been blown open by the wind last night. Not sure what gain there would be for anyone to open it though? Wouldn't even be able to see it from the street when the car is parked on the drive.

  36. #1336
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Gongrats on your ghost bro.

  37. #1337
    I used to be funny.
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    Jeremy Beadle still likes to fuck with people, even in death.

  38. #1338
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    Quote Originally Posted by niko_cee View Post
    Buy a house with Manc Sean.
    Bizarrely I got the keys to my rented southsea apartment on Thursday.

    About to put my house in manc on the market for sale or rent to see what comes back.

  39. #1339
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Still trying to wade through the shite that is step 1 (repayment of my H2B equity loan) and inshallah it will be done by next month but just had a surveyor come in to do the mandated valuation inspection.

    Shines his laser measure once in each room pretending to note the result down and he's off on his way in under 5 minutes with £160 of my hard-earned cash. I remember once having a crafty crackhead slip a £20 out my wallet whilst sucking me off in a doorway and I reckon I felt more fulfilled with that transaction even though I didn't ejaculate.

    What a gig though. Fatima needs awareness of it.

  40. #1340
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    It's a good gig but my mate who was a surveyor has surpassed that in becoming a construction adjudicator which basically means working at home for 5 times the salary.

  41. #1341
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    In September I agreed to buy a flat off some woman. I was going to wait until about now to save more deposit for myself, but she messaged me inviting me to bid so that she could move on another property, so I just thought whatever, I don't want to miss out on that flat, and across however many days we came up with a price. I did notice at the time that as soon as we did that moving on this other property became her looking for one, but I didn't think much of it because money talks. I got my formal mortgage offer today and she said she wasn't willing to proceed with it until she found somewhere else, and that this was going to be complicated by the lockdown etc., so she didn't mind if I wanted to pull out. I said I still want the flat, but that I'm not willing to wait for her to find somewhere and have to rent for potentially months on end. She said I knew that these were always her terms, so I sent her the screenshot of her September message where she asked me to make a bid because 'I cannot proceed on the property in Southampton until I am under offer', and she hasn't replied since.

    I figure she is just sitting on my offer and waiting for prices to come down; but, if you think they're going to come down, why would you risk having to sell your own flat then for less to avoid having to rent for a few months? What else could her game be?

  42. #1342
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Are you dealing with her directly?

  43. #1343
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Women usually say the opposite of what they mean, so when she says 'I don't mind if you want to pull out,' what she means is 'Please please please don't pull out, and keep your offer in for the next 5 years until I get the universal price drop my bullshit calculations were expecting a lot sooner'.

  44. #1344
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Are you dealing with her directly?
    Yeah, it's through Doorsteps or something. I will give it a day or so and then say my offer stands but I want it doing now.

  45. #1345
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Never leave it to the pull-out game.

  46. #1346
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Prices already are dropping. Especially on Flats. I'd message her offering £5k less than what you agreed. She can't expect you to wait for the market to drop for her without expecting the same treatment in return. Well, obviously she can, but fuck that.

  47. #1347
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    The new year sell-off bonanza only for Rishi the don to extend the SDLT holiday as a desperate last resort to appear as though the economy isn't going to hell in a handcart

  48. #1348
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    The real insult was thinking I wouldn't remember old messages. Do you know who I am sweetheart?

  49. #1349
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    I’ve had that. People trying to screw you over without realising you’re an autistic robot. You lose, cupcake, cos here’s that text message from eight months ago where you said no matter what I don’t have to work weekends. Suck on it, Anne-Marie.
    I'm a twit

  50. #1350
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    You should send her a PDF portfolio of your e-victories, Lewis.

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