Nice. I'm sure you'll be on track in a year as it's a great role to progress in fairly quickly. Loads of jobs in NL too. I've been a PM/PO for about 10 years so gimme a shout if I can help.
They've just delayed upping the language level on the residency requirement so I'm tempted to try and go for the Dutch this year.
Yeah I'm pretty well set-up from a CV perspective already. Did 4 years of non-technical part-time QA work at Spotify in my early 20s so I'm very much brought up in agile work methods, and had a full year over 19/20 at the EMEA headquarters for one of the largest apparel companies, working as a business user towards an agile team developing an in-house tool to take over a load of Excel planning work.
What I'm mainly lacking is proper technical skills, since I come from a pure business education, so picking up some useful SQL tools as well as becoming better at understanding overall architecture is on the to do list for the coming year or two, and then I can make a pretty easy argument for making the move proper.
“Agile” is the biggest load of shit going.
I’m sure there some aspects of work that could benefit from it, but from my experience it’s become a buzzword and thrown at everything as a solution.
Cool - yeah I think if you can do Excel/SQL stuff to a decent level and also have a fair understanding of how APIs work you'll be golden.Originally Posted by Bernanke
The concept is fine (break work down into small, deliverable chunks so you can adapt over time, rather than plan everything in advance to great detail and find out the world has moved on whilst you've been doing that) but it's got a lot of buzzword/consultant types you have to ignore. I also think it doesn't really apply to every industry or certain types of projects
We're going full agile at scale at the bank. It really is a hammer for anything even if it isn't a nail. I think management at times doesn't understand why everything isn't suited for 'agile' so you have the performance of it when in reality, the organisation is too slow with certain decisions that slow deliveries away from a sprint cycle.
I don't get agile until about 11am. Might be my mattress.
Alright Shaggy.
I have no idea what that Kiko post means, unless he's made an agile switch into the blacksmith trade.
I've got a Court Hearing today for the first time ages. Dreading it. I've no idea how it all works in a Covid World and sufficient time has passed for my brain to purge all memory of what I used to do on a weekly basis.
This page has largely been less intelligible [and a bigger indictment of humanity] than the shit stick discussion in the 'rona thread.
Trust me, it's better that way. Never learn about ceremonies, burn down charts, velocity charts, story points, retrospectives or scrum master roles.
I had no idea Blacksmithery was so complex.
I've just gone onto the APM website (Association for Project Management) in an attempt to get a clearly defined idea of what agile means.
Nope. Absolutely useless.Agile is a framework and a working mind-set which helps respond to changing requirements. It focuses on delivering maximum value against business priorities in the time and budget allowed, especially when the drive to deliver is greater than the risk.
There are four principles of agile, and these are they:
In an agile environment, how a project is delivered is driven by a team working with end users, focus is on a core deliverable and iterating over time. Allowing the user to drive the design of a project can make a significant difference to project outcomes. Agile favours benefits and innovation through collaboration with a particular focus on customer satisfaction, quality, teamwork and effective management.Agile emphasises a shift from a control to consensus. Focus is on people achieving benefits through engaged, accountable, high performing teams with focus on sharing data, openness, team communication and learning from feedback. This often requires behaviour change; those playing management roles become in and of the team both serving and leading to create commitment and accountability to an end goal.The traditional ‘waterfall’ uses an agreed scope to create a time and resources plan. Agile establishes the resources and time which ultimately drive scope. There will be a number of time and cost delivery windows, sprints, through which the project will evolve.
An agile environment establishes a minimum viable product (MVP); the core project deliverable to trigger the start of a delivery. This is likely to change as the project team realises other opportunities or benefits that become available throughout each sprint.I'm a smart guy and I know what words mean. All of the above is absolute horse shit.The team owns the MVP working together to develop the product; what they will deliver and how they will deliver it. The delivery team is ‘cocooned’ to focus on the solution to the problem they are dealing with. The team will make constant adjustments to the scope of the product.
The business world runs on people being conned into thinking the above is anything substantive.
I am an Agile Worker. Basically it's working from home with a hotdesk available if I need one and I'm expected to be out and about occasionally. Simple. I'd love to know how many hours and pounds were wasted on churning out that guidance.
This is where it started: http://agilemanifesto.org - most of what Jimmy posted there is yogababble that consultant types try to peddle at Ł800 a day.
If there's anything I've learned through 4 years of business studies, it's that 90% of it is just learning a new language created to gatekeep people and make them think that all the project and cultural change managers are actually doing something profound. Just read through a couple of articles on Harvard Business Review and realize what a sham it all is.
Doesn't stop me from being good at it and getting paid well for it though.
Last edited by Bernanke; 16-08-2021 at 10:44 AM.
The problem is in places like mine, traditionally you'd sign up to a multi year, multi million project to deliver a piece of technology but then because it's so slow to deliver, you lead to long, obsolete expenses that sometimes you just abandon. So the idea is to break projects down into bite size smaller projects and deliver the technology quicker with 'mvp' (a small part that starts to be used). It is supposed to reduce project risk but also allow you to make changes and kill things earlier.
I realise that might all still be Bollocks so sorry.
It's not bollocks, but I'm certain that farming, cleaning, building etc all use similar process changes without having to dress it up in all that wank.
It turns out what my employer calls "Agile Working" is a completely different beast to what Kiko is going on about. Just sounds like they've repackaged "Lean" to be honest.
Lean is more operational effectiveness and reducing waste (kaizen).
Which is what this sounds like really, it's just applying similar principles to a different area of the business and slapping a fashionable name badge on it.
There's definitely a wheel being reinvented here.
This seems to confirm it to me. There's minor differences, but it's basically the same thing in more modern clothing.
In fact, practitioners of both methods often use the terms synonymously when describing common practices. To make things even more complicated, many companies adopt a Lean framework when trying to scale Agile across the organization. Are you confused yet?
The problem for me is I’m not part of a project, I support two oil platform so where the major problem to solve changes on a daily, sometimes hourly, basis.
And yet, we are still encouraged to be agile and spouted the above drivel as if it’s revolutionary.
Ultimately my swim lane in the kan ban is a to do list that I look at after my physical post it note version is complete so I can shuffle the cards to match. Crock of shit.
Fixed.
As a consultant who is sometimes asked to talk about Agile in the context of organizational structures/ways of working, I will say that the methodology is (in and of itself) fine and highly applicable to things like shipping out software.
However, the way the word is thrown around to mean everything (and thus nothing) renders it as good as technobabble.
Last edited by Luca; 16-08-2021 at 06:16 PM.
Working in the office is shit and will remain shit until everybody's back.
It must be annoying having to use the toilet brush rather than pissing it off later.
Why would that annoy me?
Oh come on.
Stop talking in riddles Keeks.
There's a woman at work that keeps committing the same offence that Jimmy's cricket mate does (not the MegaCuck).
Everytime I email her, even if it's just an FYI, she calls me to discuss it. To make matters worse, she's one of those people that thinks they're making a difference in the world. Love, shut the fuck up. We're all playing at this shit. None of it matters and nothing would change if you stopped doing your job tomorrow. Nobody would notice.
Yeah the people at work that insist on having to have a verbal conversation/MEETING for anything are annoying, but in my personal life it's generally the opposite which is probably more annoying.
About half my mates just refuse to answer when you call them, and instead let it ring out and text instead, because they shit themselves at the prospect of talking on the phone. Usually it's logistics about when/where we're meeting, which pub etc, which takes ten times longer over text. I'd say they just hate speaking to ME but a group discussion revealed that they just don't like telephone conversations. It isn't that bad.
I’ll normally text someone within 2 minutes of them ringing me asking what they want.
It makes sense for people like you though cus it's only gonna be your missus moaning about something or someone trying to sell you something, it's people doing it to their mates which I find incomprehensible.
Yeah, I never understand those types. The ones that do want to climb the ladder just shut up and get on with it.
My Mrs would never be ringing me to moan about something. She’s the only one I’d answer anyway.
Does anyone text people trying to sell them something asking what they want? You’re an odd fish.
I don't even think she's one of them, she's just a chatty bollocks.
Today I emailed her to say I had sent a bit of paperwork over to the court and she should be receiving confirmation of hearing date soon. She was on the phone within minutes to tell me about her last meeting with her and blah blah blah. 15 minutes of me going "oh yeah?... nightmare... I know, I know... yeah, we shouldn't have to put up with it but it is what it is...". It was like "Now That's Disinterested Platitudes 104" for fuck sake.
That's annoying. You can't outright tell her to do one but feigned interest means you're going to be hearing it until she croaks. You can't set up out of office replies aimed at specific people, can you?
Ask her what she thinks of Mark Noble the next time she calls.
I can't work this morning.
The problem for me is when that happens it just means I have to work the weekend to make a deadline
Fixed
We had people complaining that they couldn't access the VPN but could get on Google and normal sites. Best of both worlds surely, you can't do work but you can fuck about
Didn't get the Senior Admin role but our gaffer has rung round to give detailed feedback. I wasn't far off.
Would that not be just to keep you happy after getting knocked back?
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