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View Poll Results: Do we need another one of these now?

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  • Absolutely

    1 14.29%
  • No

    2 28.57%
  • No, but it should be fun/the most personal ever

    4 57.14%
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Thread: WDYTOE 2021 - Pandemic Edition - The List?

  1. #101
    Senior Member CJay's Avatar
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    Giggles saying I’m English and Seven Om thinking I raise ducks. I need to review my post history, I think.

  2. #102
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It's ok, Baz enjoys my contribution to the beer thread despite me having no recollection of ever posting in there.

  3. #103
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Typical Disco, always drunk on beer.

  4. #104
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco View Post
    It's ok, Baz enjoys my contribution to the beer thread despite me having no recollection of ever posting in there.
    Mixing you up with niko_cee innit. Soz
    I'm a twit

  5. #105
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I always get Niko and Raoul Duke mixed up.

    Clearly Niko needs to differentiate himself. Maybe some kind of jaunty hat?

  6. #106
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    No more trannies, 7. Me and the missus been living together 2 years, have a house now, two pets. Not mental.

  7. #107
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    And she's robbed you from us. Get rid.

  8. #108
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Niko is infinitely better than Traul Puke.

  9. #109
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    -james- - Was about 11 when he joined iirc. If it wasn't for the avatar I wouldn't notice you tbh. Seems like a solid lad and for that, kudos.

    7om - Top poster these days. The fact its taken several big hitters fucking off to achieve this is a thing, but still. Absolute graft and commitment. Love ya. I generally agree with your Covid postings btw so I've got your back. Was it you who fucked off to China or something, or is my old brain fucked?

    Adamski - Not posted in 3 months. Fuck knows. Killer.

    Adramelch - Going off post history, absolutely fucking loves the football. Mad for it. Off his tits for young lads and balls.

    Alan Shearer The 2nd - See Adamski.

    Alex - Always liked this lad. Has a swagger to his posts.

    Andrew - Absolutely fuck all clue. Post history shows he's down with the corona.

    Andy - Bam with intelligence.

    AyDee - You're just making posters up now.

    Bam - Andy without intelligence. Top lad though. Been around forever, gotta be pushing 50 now. His wife was/is a cracker. I say was as he's probably living out the back of his van on a twenty year old mattress now still crying about West Ham selling Joe Cole. Man can't get over it. First kid, wanted to name him Joe, missus said no. "How about Cole??" he pleads. She tells him to fuck off. Other fans say Ferdinand was the bigger talent but he and his mates know the swazz young Joe could put on a Mitre. Gorgeous thighs he had. That grin. He wants to be Joe. Drinks a litre of Bells an evening and scrubs graffiti as a day job. Comes on here as we're all Joe Cole to him. Don't mention Carrick - fraud.

    Baz - Utter lunatic. Love him to death but also fucking terrifies me more than any complex I've had to deal with. Once sent pizza to DM's home address, and the anchovies spelt out 'You die tonight'. Seems a tiny bit more chill these days but probably a ruse.

    Bernanke - If he posts in one of the five threads I read, I'll focus on his posts. Apparently likes Loki, dickhead.

    Boydy - No Sudden Move around this lad. Has A Portrait of a Lady on Fire on his wall. Eyeballs women and they call him 'Pig'. Sound of Metal ringing in his ears as he enjoys the drudgery of life. Always game for Another Round. Black Bear of the family. Are you vegan now? If you are fuck off. Love ya.

    Browning - FM, football, wrestling. Another decent lad.

    bruhnaldo - Our own school shooter in waiting. Fucking cock.

    Byron - Not posted in five months. Likes cricket. Give a fuck.

    CJay - I actually enjoy his football posts. Haven't got much else to add.

    Clunge - Another who likes cricket.

    Cord - Mate just post more alright.

    Dan - NFL PIGSKIN CLUSTERFUCK SHOULDER PAD WANKER

    Danny - Absolute mad for the Fifa. Shows a commitment many can only dream off. Live your life bro.

    Dave. - Last post was a lazy Twitter rip off. Nah mate what ya doing.

    Davgooner - The Guv. As others have said, only thing I've seen from him of late is the word cunt chucked about. But his cunt has weight. Like ya mam's.

    Disco - Posts a lot, keeps the place going. Not hit the peaks of earlier years but another staple legend.

    Don - I don't get it. What do you actually do or offer. Its like spunk is your religion and you have fucking stigmata. Weirdly obsessed with gash, BBC and cocks into arseholes. See a psychologist ya weird cunt. Likes DnB though, good lad.

    Dquincy - Hahahahaha Christ

    five time - Can't find him on the member list. Another made up poster.

    Foe - Ya still hench bro? Peaked with the onesie years ago. Completely harmless.

    Giggles - My kinda dude these days. Unrepentant in his hatred for almost everything. I'm reaching that point of life so can relate. I estimate he's about five stone overweight and his idea of a date is a cheeky Wetherspoons 2 for a tenner and a quick nosh in a BnB. Don't change, please.

    Gray Fox - Fuck off for WWE. Kudos on the gaming. Its the wrong games but it'll do. Nearly 10k posts bro. Bang it on the CV.

    Guybrush - Another fake poster.

    hfswjyr - You're not even trying now lads.

    Ian - Distinctly not beige these days. Similar to Seven, a top boy but its a result of circumstance. I read everything you post. Print 'em out and put 'em in the journal. One day, pal.

    igor_balis - Seems to like cricket. Mate. Aside from that is a good lad.

    ItalAussie - Did he/she/they have that realignment surgery in the end? Always liked Ital, actually intelligent and one of the few mods who gave me leeway when I was a fucking mess. You still over there mate?

    Jimmy Floyd - I have a lot of respect for Jimmy. Its fair to say me and him didn't get on/give a shit for a long, long time but he's morphed into this languid, awesome poster over the past few years. One of the big four on here imo. Its rare I change my tune about anyone so take it as a compliment. Or don't, but I like you alright. Fuck's sake. Cricket wanker.

    John - Seems a load kinda hated him but another poster I had and have a lot of love for. Apparently he's dead, so I just hope he's up in heaven somewhere pointing at Mahow and laughing.

    John Arne - No posts in three months, but he's been around since the early 00s I believe. Good lad for that.

    Josh - Dunno. Top avatar.

    Kikó - If it wasn't for him I'd have had to retire back in 2009. Never had an issue with Kiko, handsome motherfucker,. jawline to melt ya heart. Sort ya hair out though bro. Also you're a Manc, calm down the middle class wank.

    Lewis - Tries way too hard for such a small community. Mate you're a fucking bright guy. Calm down with the humour every post. You can and probably have donned every fucker here. Another I didn't see eye to eye with for a good while. You're fucking weird, but then most geniuses are.

    Limoutsonik - Fake poster.

    Lofty - Myth. Mental. Legend. Seven foot of perversion. Still bosses the trains I believe, still wearing women like a glove. I'd be the least surprised if a member on here appeared in the press for having a nipple belt and thigh tuxedo, and it was him. Helped me out the other month (didn't come to owt, sos mate).

    Luca - Ah mate you've gotta be 18 now right? Suave.

    Luke Emia - Background noise, ion the nicest way possible.

    Magic - Why are you such a hateful cunt, mate? You used to be chill. Its 2021 ffs, trolling at such a subhuman, incapable level ain't the thing. I know your life is basically Hiroshima, but its okay, you're still young (I think). Give ya skull a wobble and sort it out.

    Manc - Best username.

    Max Power - Likes cricket. Not a cricket wanker. Good content. Would subscribe.

    Mazuuurk - Mainly posts about games. But its Maz ffs. Legend of the board.

    Mellberg - Analytical God. Stocks supremo. Probably richer than all of us and fully deserved. Always had the utmost respect for ya since ya first appeared (me, you and R1 used to don the fucking place). Accent keeps me up at night, chills.

    Mike - Completely sane Baz - seems to be stunted in mental growth but I like you.

    mikem - No posts in seven months. Why the fuck you on here

    mo - Is this OG mo? If so probably been around longer than me. No idea what you post, like.

    mugbull - see Quincy.

    niko_cee - see Igor.

    Offshore Toon - Top boy round here, for me. Our hate/respect for each other through the years is more fucking volatile than a crypto chart, but he's aged well. Found his feet, slippers on. Old before his years at times. Still in touch with youth culture from what I can tell. Give it five years lad.

    Panda Bear - You still an oddly pretentious weirdo? I like you, anyway.

    Pen - Pen still posts? Geez. Basically Maz, but from a shitter country.

    Pepe - I still have memories of what an absolute wasteman you were time ago. Hyperactive fucking lunatic. But mate, how you've grown. Its like a teacher watching a lad go on and play for England, whilst getting fuck all of the reward. a five second segment on the News then a new class bullying ya, calling ya 'Pepe Wanker', 'Did ya suck him off in the showers sir?'. Worth it though. Proud of you son.

    phonics - I follow him on Twitter. I don't agree with most, if anything he says, and seemed very unstable for a long time. But has seemingly mellowed and keeps his ownage style posts to Twitter. None of them own but its the effort, right.

    Pleb - Football, F1 and pissing his money away on bets. Its a life, I guess.

    P_3 - Another old timer iirc. Haven't noticed a single post.

    Queenslander - One of the few I see bother with Rugby. Good lad. Makes some very solid posts.

    randomlegend - You the Doctor, yeah? Very good in the Corona thread. Probably other threads too. Well done.

    Raoul Duke - Another Fifa mental. We're at the point in the list where everyone is just solid really.

    Reg - Again, solid. Sorry for not having more to say.

    ScousePig - Another legend. Hasn't really changed tack in posting style. Dennis Irwin of the board.

    Serj - No idea. I'm sure he's good?

    Shindig - Had the peak moment of TTH. Still elbow deep into games. Smashes out the odd self-deprecating banger of a post. The stuff with your flatmate was second most peak, tied with Al0n's freakout. Stalwart. Twitch streams are good but up the quality, its like watching games in pissy rain.

    SincereTheRebel - Mate you're a fucking idiot but somehow I think you know and embrace it. No doubt a relative success in life and I love you for it.

    Sir Andy Mahowry - Mate ffs. Too long to type out so I did a word cloud of your major posts:




    Smjffy - Shame you've calmed down on the FM. Those were good posts. Also good that you've seemingly calmed down and settled in life and have put your fidgety energy into bettering yourself. Legend.

    Spammer - what

    Spikey M - Another of the big four. Ties the board together. Humour, can dish out the serious shit. Another who's matured beautifully.

    Spoonsky - Another that we had mututal dislike/wtf with for ages. Serious posts. They make sense. Will always be a serious man. Go you, you're sound.

    SvN - Top avatar. Dishes out shit where appropriate. One of the best mods/admins the board has had throughout the years.

    TG09 - No posts in 8 months again why is he here

    The Merse - Another of the Fifa cult. Alright lad. Used to do my nut in in the past, but not anymore. That's something.

    thommo - Another solid if unspectacular entity.

    Trancemeister - Only time I've ever communicated with him was about obscure European hardcore/techno. Top lad.

    Vercetti - If you dislike him you need to go and fucking eviscerate yourself. Shameful behaviour. I'll always love ya.

    Waffdon - A lad's lad's lad. Absolute madman. Banter out the cunt. Fucking wanks himself off into a cone. 16 pints in and he'll fuck up the bouncer. Topless in a garden punching a 14yo. Legend.

    wullie - FM only these days. Funniest fucker to ever appear on here. I miss you, personally wullie. Insane comedic mind.

    Yeldoow - The fuck is this

    Yevrah - I respect the grind, Yev. The fucking sound of Fifa tabs being opened and closed, rifling through cards and discarding while barely ever playing a match is stuck on a fucking loop in my head. Fallout obsessed, move on. You're like an AI amalgamation of the entire board. Almost frightening. Legend.

  10. #110
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Mahow's word cloud.

  11. #111
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    Fantastic list.

  12. #112
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    What a list that is. Legit lols.

  13. #113
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Ukraine Sepsis

  14. #114
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    That list is superb.

  15. #115
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Aye, that's set the bar incredibly high.

  16. #116
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Bam's entry also great.

  17. #117
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Some sensational lists in the last few pages. Great stuff.

  18. #118
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    The Baz entry is quite something. It felt like Baz had gotten weirder recently, but in reality he's probably at his calmest and just sharing all the little weird things he does.

    I really wish somebody had fully recorded the Baz-Henry feud from back in the day. That would be an amazing read right now.

  19. #119
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    That list. Poor Mahow. For some reason "Is alopecia sexy" is the one that got the biggest lol out of me there.

  20. #120
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    Mostly for Lewis this, but I've just rattled off 8 names so it has started and there will be a list from me.

  21. #121
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Even bigger BBC ffs

  22. #122
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The Baz pizza story, true or not, has me in tears of hysterics.

  23. #123
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Of course it’s not true. I really got on well with DM.
    I'm a twit

  24. #124
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    Its just what he wants you to think

  25. #125
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    Were you a bit mad back in the day then, @Baz? I’ve heard about the rivalry with Henry but it was before my time.

  26. #126
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    It was brilliant. Henry was on a high on the back of his "the British Army have just landed a chopper in my back garden" thread, but Baz took him down with Garden Soccer.

  27. #127
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    I wouldn't say Baz was mad, just very young, hyperactive and annoying. Henry acted a right cunt, tbf. No worse than some of us have though. I remember a guy posting about how worried he was as it was 2am and his girlfriend was walking home alone from town. I replied with "she'll be fine, most rapists have standards".

    Different time.

  28. #128
    Senior Member Bernanke's Avatar
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    The word cloud, my god.

    @7om, I got called an upmarket diljeet in one of the older versions, and I'm happy with that position. I don't need to bring the lols.

  29. #129
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Weren't Baz and Henry going after each others private lives at the time in all that?

  30. #130
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    Henry was posting on his pissabout Garden Soccer site telling him to die etc.

  31. #131
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 7om View Post
    Were you a bit mad back in the day then, @Baz? I’ve heard about the rivalry with Henry but it was before my time.
    I guess? I think it was more me having no filter and just wanting people to be entertained by me.

    Henry telling me to kill myself every week aside, I think I was mostly known for posting daft photos of whatever was going on in my life, which was mostly my cat Frank (RIP 2001-2020) and Garden Soccer which eventually progressed into photos of me pointing at drunk people who looked amusing.
    I'm a twit

  32. #132
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    I bet your neighbours loved that.

  33. #133
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Was preferable to whatever teenagers get upto now.
    I'm a twit

  34. #134
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    That's definitely true.

  35. #135
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Garden Soccer 100% would have been on tiktok.

  36. #136
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    -james- - A John Peel for our times, except instead of playing the Undertones 40 times in a row, he exhibits instead a quite magnificently hit-and-miss array of diverse tonal (and sometimes atonal) wares. Nevertheless, I have him to thank for getting me into Richard... what's his name? Richard Brown? No. Richard Ashcroft? No, he's the twat from the Verve. If I don't know the bloke's name, am I actually into him at all? If a bloke bleats in a Geordie accent for a full several albums' worth and I can't remember his surname, did I really listen? It's not Richard Thompson, either. I'm Googling it now. Richard Dawson. I have that name reserved in my mind for the disappointing 2000s Gloucestershire and Yorkshire off-spinner. I'm sorry. 'We park up by the derelict primary school, tie bags for life around our ankles'.

    7om - Comes across as refreshed and renewed after whatever it was that kept him from posting for ages. 'Glad that the beatings have stopped', as Steve Flemming would put it.

    Adamski - Choose a three piece hire suit, in a range of fucking fabrics.

    Adramelch - Greece was the cradle of all we hold dear in western civilisation: democracy, the scientific method, bumming boys on the sly. To think that they are now reduced to a cultural output of Vangelis, Stavros Flatley and the sparse posts of Adramelch makes one feel a little despondent to what depths our own culture may one day plunge. Of course, I'm being harsh on Adra, he's fine, even if I do hear the unnerving organ strain of this in my head whenever he graces us with his presence.

    Alan Shearer The 2nd - He posted a picture of his garden a while back. I don't understand how anyone has the energy to be that much of an adult. I go to work on a Monday, come home and I'm already fucked, and that's just from sitting down in a chair all day telling Frenchmen to fuck off. I think boredom tires you out, you know? The failure to live commands a higher tax on the mind than does a life well-lived. I think that's why I involuntarily fall asleep on the sofa at 6pm most nights, while Alan Shearer the 2nd is out feeding his hydrangeas.

    Alex - I think it was Alex who encouraged me to listen to more Dylan last year. I'm glad, because although I find his 60s stuff a bit crap (Dylan's, not Alex's), the 70s stuff is a glorious thing, as is some of the later stuff. During lockdown (the OG lockdown) I got properly into Blood on the Tracks, and doing so got me through some of the lonelier April weeks when the evening sun was seeping through the window, the trees were leafless silhouettes, bereft against the orange sky, and I hadn't seen a friendly human for 70 days or whatever it ended up being. What times they were, the romantic days of OG lockdown. Now, after three lockdowns, I just have a stack of yoghurt pots that need to go in the recycling, and I haven't dusted the skirting boards since November. Time is a jet plane, it moves too fast.

    Andrew - There will be more and more Andrews, out there, as time progresses and more and more people realise that everything Tony Blair said between 1990 and 2010 was a load of utter tripe. That is to say there will be more and more people who, with nothing else to do, reject the soppy consensus that has built up in public discourse over time, and decide to be performatively right wing despite not necessarily having a vast fortune to, well, conserve. I'm not judging him. Well, maybe I am judging him, but you see, like Tony, I can see things from both points of view. There is no right, dude, and there is no wrong; there's equality, the Third Way, and jobs for June Sarpong.

    Andy - St Mary's was the first place I ever experienced the phenomenon of parking up for a football match, only to be approached by a couple of kids asking for money to 'look after' your car. My mate, who had the local knowledge, told them to fuck off, and they did; his car survived the day intact, too. Since Southampton is clearly not the sort of place where kids are brought up to run extortion rackets properly, I also assume that Andy must be coining it in to build their newel posts, and paid on time too. Good on him, a solid ever-present poster here.

    AyDee - Precocity is a curse, because from there the only way is down, even if you do pretty well for yourself. I wish him all the best in overcoming this state of affairs.

    Bam - If the scaffolding racket ever dries up, there are options. Take pornography, for example. There are specialist genres (I understand) in which large blokes wander bare-chested into rooms and say things like 'Here we are, love, cor, it's a bit fuckin' 'ot in 'ere, innit? Let me 'elp you outta that skimpy fuckin' leotard'. OK, as you can see I'm never going to be a script writer for porn, but you know the sort of thing I mean. You'll have time to learn your craft - not much time, mind, as once the back hair starts going grey you'll be restricted to 'Horny Grandad Bangs Next Door Neighbour' type affairs - but whatever happens, you can always be sure that there'll be a middle aged man in Manchester, Mike Summerbee shirt pinned to his bedroom wall, cock in hand, enjoying your work for what it is.

    Baz - He's been born into the wrong decade, really. In another era he would have been a good, old-fashioned con artist, a bit like Steve Martin in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. Is that a spoiler? I don't think it is. As it is, he is left having to try the grift online. Seems to have quite esoteric taste. I imagine his living room decor is a bit of a bomb scare, unless his wife sorts all that out. I have a mate like that. There is quite literally a three-foot metallic structure on the window sill that spells out LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE. I thought he was winding me up, when I saw it, but oh no. He earns the money, she makes the decisions. I hope it's like that in the Baz household.

    Bernanke - Posts somewhat from the shadows. Pulls it off.

    Boydy - I'm glad he's found his calling and seems to have done well at it. I think a successful life suits him much better than being the miserable bastard of old. I'd like to say that applies to everyone, but it probably doesn't. Some people thrive on failure. I might be one of them, to be honest. If I was one of my old school mates on a hundred grand living in a glass flat with a Thames vista, I reckon I'd be an insufferable prick. As it is, I may still be an insufferable prick but at least I have some perspective. Boydy, on the other hand, benefits from less perspective, at least if his posts are anything to go by. The angst of old has given way to a sense of humour. Give him a few years and he'll be hanging out in Monte Carlo harbour; in the Abramovich sense, I hope, rather than in the Ascari sense.

    Browning - In 2002, there was a new kid in my class called Stuart Browning. He was faced with a number of challenges, not least that 2002 was far beyond the point when one could, as a 14 year old, be taken seriously while being named 'Stuart'. Another was that new kids never really stop being new kids, in the minds of the old kids. You have the established lot, the ones who are there in the first September, and even if there is a bit of attrition via things like family moving away, exclusion, ill health or accidental death, those are basically the ones who make it through to the end together. The new kids? Fuck you, you rocked up halfway through, you didn't see what we saw. Browning, unlike my man Stuart, will be one of the old kids of the board, even if we can't quite remember what he's done along the way.

    bruhnaldo - The best thing about being English is that we don't have to pronounce our Rs. Think about it - father, mother, tinker, tailor. If you're English and not from the west country, you're not pronouncing the last letter there. Now try and do it. Feel how you have to use so much more of your mouth (the bottom front part, particularly). At some point around the 18th century, most people in England stopped pronouncing their Rs. The Scots, the Irish, and by extension the Americans, continued. This is the fissure between our cultures. We don't use all of our mouths, because we're above that. We don't have craic. We don't call you 'buddy'. We certainly don't offer 'famously warm hospitality'. We sneer at you from across the tube carriage and wish you would go away. bruhnaldo is the opposite of this. bruhnaldo is an American in excelsis, and it's no surprise he has regular meltdowns when in our company. Good on him. But good on us, too.

    Byron - He used to (perhaps still does, for all I know) work for Aviva, which for regional snobs like me is a useful way to pigeon hole him. Everyone in Norwich should work for Aviva. Everyone in Stoke should work for bet365. Everyone in Luton should make hats. Everyone in Sheffield should traipse into the steel works, of a morning, with the stench of last night's tripe and onions still wafting from their breath. Everyone in Newcastle should work at Sports Direct (sorry, that's what you are, now). And everyone in Wales should be unemployed.

    CJay - I picture him as the bloke from Normal People. I liked the book of that (I enjoy reading her way of reporting speech) but the TV version left me cold, even when the bloke got his knob out. It felt like a poor excuse to make the girl get her muff out. Books do that sort of thing much better in terms of the spiritual and sometimes metaphysical description of what's going on and what it means to the characters, rather than TV's: Oh look, that man has a penis, and - you'll never believe this - the girl's got two breasts, and now they're going to rub against each other for a bit and grunt.

    Clunge - I've never known what 'clunge' is, though I think I can guess. It brings to mind a drunken man lying under shop awnings in Glasgow as scantily-clad women pass by at night. 'Goodness!', he might shout after one, in a public school English accent, because this man has fallen far. 'I can see right up your clunge!'

    Cord - Tosser, for almost never posting when he clearly has nothing better to be doing.

    Danny - I've always wondered whether, in order to survive in America, you have to turn into an American. I am really doubtful that my brand of scowling superiority complex would cut the mustard, over there. It's a country where everyone seems to wear their heart on their sleeve. Danny seems to have bridged the divide well enough, so good luck to him.

    Dark Soldier - Has one of the best usernames. Rarely pops in these days but seems to be doing rather better than ten years ago, which is nice.

    Dave. - This is Martin, isn't it? Rarely seen in the wild.

    Davgooner - There are two types of people in life: those who would drive the TTH van, and those who would sit in the passenger seat, help load it up with tools or goods, and stand outside it waving their arms to help back it in through gates and into parking spaces. I would be the latter. Dave would be the former. I remember him once saying on here, years ago: 'Sex is all about the man'. How right he was.

    Disco - The only thing I'm never quite sure about with the Sergeant is how he ended up here in the first place, since he seems to have absolutely zero interest in association football. Great in the threads where he and I coincide. Presumably good in the others too, who could say.

    Don - Our fella here seems to have been experiencing three or four different meltdowns all at once. I am never quite sure which ones are sincere and which tongue-in-cheek. I was going to do a racist gag about tongue-in-cheek being a Persian delicacy but that in fact brings me on to the next curious point which is that, in the British context, and by some measures at least, Taz is in fact the custodian of his very own black life - and far be it from me, a gammon (honey-glazed), to dictate whether or not it matters. The wit of old remains but it seems a troubled wit, these days; the kind you find on the tip of your tongue at 3am when everyone has gone home and it is only the dead pot plants and the night air which are still there to receive your bon mots. They never laugh, and yet they never roll their eyes or frown, either; they just acknowledge, without judgement, if you are patient with them.

    Dquincy - He brings normie humour to the board. You know, when you're sitting in a pub, or at a legal outdoor gathering compliant to current restrictions in your area, and someone says 'Yeah, I bet she takes it up the arse!!!' or similar, with a complete lack of guile or irony, and you smile or perhaps titter politely so as to keep up appearances among your parrot-brained companions, but really you're thinking oh for fuck's sake this wasn't funny in 2004 and it sure as hell isn't funny now? Dquincy does that, but on the board, which makes it even worse, because this place is full of sharp people - like, sharp people. He also sounds like the sort of boss you would cross the road to avoid bumping into a decade later, after leaving an otherwise satisfactory job purely so you never had to hear his voice again.

    five time - It's amazing the sort of people record companies were pumping up in the mid 90s. Nowadays, if you want a top 20 chart hit, you'd best be black, and if you're not black, you'd best be fucking trying. There is not the slightest prayer than Ann Lee would be pushed cross-territory these days. Number one in Flanders, apparently. I didn't know that was a thing. Five times (do do doo-do doo-do). Six times. Five times.

    Foe - Many moons ago, I used to spend a lot of time around the sorts of places he would have grown up in and seen while growing up. You know. The names that pepper the Highland League. Inverness. Nairn. Elgin. The Black Isle. Cromarty. Buckie. Forres. Findhorn. Tomintoul. Dufftown! The lot. Anyway, what all of these places have in common is that the bricks in the buildings are all the same colour, and that colour is grey. We're not talking a standard slate grey, either. This is a grey that permeates your soul. This is a grey that, when it rains, which it always does, makes the walls reflect your own face back at you screaming 'Fuck off!'. This is a grey that turns Death to the bottle. There are very few people who emerge intact from a childhood spent around this constant grey. Most of them become drunks, or farm hands, or drunken farm hands. To that end, Foe has done pretty well. Pretty well indeed.

    Giggles - A propos of nothing, I was in Franco Manca's in Guildford the other night and on the specials board they were doing roast potatoes as a pizza topping. I could only speculate as to what had led to this desperate state of affairs. Perhaps the chippy next door had over-ordered. Perhaps one of the bored-looking waitresses had brought a doggy bag over from Sunday lunch at grandma's. Perhaps Sir Walter Raleigh had travelled 400 years forward in time and had nowhere else to put them. Either way, it really didn't work - unlike Giggles, who seems to do nothing but work. I think of him, driving his van around Ireland, passing all those puddles and cattle, stopping in a grey deserted moonscape for lunch - a Scotch egg wrapped in greaseproof paper, with a bottle of home brew to wash it down. I think of all the insincere cheery greetings he must have to offer to half-faced men in grey caps as he goes about his work. I think about how he must use the phrase 'Not a bother' to mean either yes, no, or fuck you, depending on his mood. I then conclude that it's no wonder he is such a miserable old twat. His best post ever was: 'Friends? You're supposed to be a grown man'. He is what Roy Keane thinks he is.

    Gray Fox - I suppose this is better than being a 'silver fox', a phrase I associate exclusively with forty-something sexual predation.

    Guybrush - I don't know who this is. Guy Brush? Guy B. Rush? Why would you brush a guy? I suppose you would, if you wanted him to look neater. Maybe it's just his name. Guy Brush. That sounds like a dire local radio DJ if ever there was one. Thanks for the travel, my sweetheart. You're listening to the Guy Brush Breakfast on Corpse FM, loud and proud across North Staffordshire and the Potteries. Here's one for you: what do you call Lenny Henry when he dresses up smart to pick up his citizenship in Bangkok? That's right, a black Thai. Boom! That was the tux biz - now here are Bucks Fizz, with mmmmakin' your mind up.

    hfswjyr - I found it very interesting how, when we won the World Cup over New Zealand by the barest of margins, the Kiwis were down but sort of alright about it, while the Indians were absolutely fucking furious. I tried to work out if it speaks to New Zealand being a lovely friendly side that neutrals want to win, or to England being the big bad bullies who neutrals want to lose. The answer is of course both. I feel in this country we need to be better at playing the heel. We think we're the good guys. We're not - our job is to crush the likes of New Zealand, and to do so with no mercy and a Dick Dastardly smile on our face. To enjoy their pain. If we ever have any likeability it comes from our comedic failure to win. I think the Kiwis get this and have built it in, but the Indians don't.

    Ian - Ian is the conscience of the board. As time goes on, he reminds me more and more of John Gielgud in Arthur. People might be having a pointless argument, or exchanging a series of crap posts, or sharing a ridiculous personal habit. Ian will appear, like Hobson, silver plate in hand. 'Oh, yes, sir, brilliant,' he will say, thin smile, polite manner, obvious sarcasm. 'What a fantastic post that was'. Then off he will slip again until the next transgression. This description is probably underselling him, but never mind. 'You feel unloved, Arthur? Welcome to the world. Everyone is unloved. Now stop feeling sorry for yourself. And incidentally, I love you.'

    igor_balis - This is where I diverge somewhat from mainstream opinion, something I am often reluctant to do. I don't buy at all the idea that Igor's anecdotes are deliberately zany or goofy or in some way worthy of disdain, which people seem to think. Others still seem to think they are made up, which is clearly absurd. They don't rub me up the wrong way at all, not even the one about someone's vagina smelling of poo, or whatever it was (perhaps I have conflated a few stories into one there). Instead I treat igor's posts in the way I (in my thirties) might sit in a city centre McDonalds at 1am, hear the tales of heroism and derring-do from the kids at the next table, and think: 'Good on you'.

    ItalAussie - Ital was never really made for the call-your-adversary-a-cunt era, was he. Too polite and respectful. With the way uni campuses are these days, he has probably been cancelled by now, for platforming a non-intersectional theorem or something. God that makes me sound old and gammony. We may have years, we may have hours, but sooner or later, we push up flowers.

    John - Choose leisure wear and matching luggage.

    John Arne - The latter stages of his posting seemed like a rather strange shill for the Vietnamese military government. When I say heads have gone, I fear in his case it might mean literally, and his skull is now being used by some people traffickers to sup their morning beetle juice.

    Kikó - During the Euros the other day I was about to make a mean-spirited post about my contempt for all the plastic azzurri fans in this country called Mark Johnson who develop a sudden Italian family connection during major tournaments. Then I realised that Kiko's name is hardly Luigi Pastapizza either, so I didn't post it in case he was offended. Such is the respect that the blue-eyed capo dei tutti capi of TTH commands. Whilst preparing my monthly gift box for him the other day, I had to remind myself to include the nice chocolates this time. My previous offering had prompted a rather curt PM from the man himself. Apparently, Viennese toffee sticks to his gums. There's a tip for you all to bear in mind whilst composing your own tribute hampers. The embarrassment kept me in bed for two days.

    Lewis - I always say that to be a top, top bloke, you need three things: a head, a heart, and a pair of balls. I categorise most men I know based on which of the three they possess (women are a bit different, and I have no need to work them out). I am a head/heart man, with no balls. A lot of my old schoolmates were head/balls, with no heart, and they went on to enjoy careers in the City and earn squillions. 2 out of 3 makes you a proper person, I think. I know a lot of heart/balls people and they are great fun, but get themselves into so much trouble. Then you get the ones with 1/3. Heart only types are those wimps who write shit poetry and praise the NHS on twitter. Balls only drive vans into bollards. Head only all work for think tanks or in IT. You get the odd 0/3, too. You know the ones I mean. Empty vessels. 3/3s are pretty rare. I know one or two. Lewis is a two and a half. The head tends to lead, with the balls not far behind. He's at his best when the heart gets a word in edgeways.

    Limoutsonik - Foolishly, I Google-searched his username, thinking that it might offer a window into the soul of a man I have never knowingly seen post. Naively, I imagined it might have been inspired by a video game character, or by a dance or trance bop act, or something of that ilk. Instead, I was confronted only by this same chap's array of accounts on various forums. The second result was: 'The Free Sex Forum'. Now, I don't know if the sex in question is free (as opposed to paid-for), or free (as opposed to being bound by convention and social norms). Either way, I hope he uses every opportunity to get his Lim out and is able to give it a good, wholesome sonik whenever he sees fit.

    Lofty - I don't know why this comes to mind, but I thought out of all the crap that they included in the last few series of Game of Thrones, one of the better done parts was the giant (can't remember his name. Yum Yum or something). Unlike giants generally are in fiction, this depiction was really sensitive, with you getting a sense of what it might actually be like to being this fifty foot lumbering freak who is doomed by the fact he is so conspicuous. Nonetheless, he does his bit in trying to save them all from ol' blue eyes, and Lofty does his bit on the board, too.

    Luca - Whenever he posts now I just hear the Succession theme music and the image alongside it is Danny DeVito gesturing angrily at his underlings in a brown 90s suit with a very wide tie.

    Magic - Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself.

    Manc - Brings some welcome edge to what is increasingly a board choosing fixed term mortgage repayments.

    Max Power - One of the things I like to do from time to time is to look back at old football matches I went to, and revisit them with added historical context. One such game was QPR 3-1 Leicester on 1 January 2008. A mate and I used to go to QPR sometimes despite neither of us being fans, as it was only twenty quid and you could get in on the gate. I don't remember it being New Year's Day, but I do remember it being freezing cold, and I also remember Leicester being absolutely awful, lucky to escape with this scoreline. At this time they had not long been managed by Ian 'Olly' Holloway, and two new centre forwards made their debuts in this game as he desperately threw everything at an ailing season. 'Barry Hayles really showed what he's all about', said Holloway afterwards of one of his new charges, a man who would go on to score 2 in 28 for the club before being farmed out to Cheltenham. Sadly their form continued this way and at the end of the season they were relegated to League One, with Holloway sacked days later. Eight years after that, they won the Premier League title. It's amazing how quickly things can change, in life. Max, for example, could post more.

    Mellberg - When I think of 'the Villa', I can only think of the Joachim-Vassell era. You know the cast list. Bosnich. Yorke. Stone. Wright. Taylor. Milosevic. Ehiogu. All the boys. I think this is a function of how memory works. First impressions count for a lot. The funny thing about Mellin is that whenever he posts (which isn't that often) he doesn't seem to have mellowed much, with age. If anything he is even more strident when it comes to sticking up for his brummie boys. Obviously being a veteran of the fuck you, pay me era has put him permanently on a war footing, much like the old Confederate soldiers used to meet up and do the rebel yell. All that bloodshed, all that misery, over Gareth Barry.

    mikem - I don't get it. There are so many places you could post exclusively about American politics. Why here? It's like me going onto a NASCAR forum to give in-depth takes on the Chesham & Amersham by-election. Once accused me of being an anti-semite after I said that Daniel Levy would cry salt tears if he dropped 50p down a stairwell.

    mo - I enjoy (if that's the right word) his tales from the world of teaching. It sounds like an unbelievable amount of faff and red tape, so I hope it's worth it in some way.

    mugbull - It's weird to feel like you miss someone you're not even sure you know.

    niko_cee - I did find it pretty hilarious that the spudmaster general sees him as a Little Englander. I guess Guernsey is little England (a very little England). Niko remains one of the better posters around, even if there is the occasional jarring moment like when he reveals he paints/used to paint Warhammer. I try never to be snobbish or dismissive of other people's interests - as mine aren't exactly too cool for school - but when it comes to Warhammer I'm afraid the genial façade crumbles. Never mind. A rare example of someone who likes more different sports than I do.

    Offshore Toon - I wish I had an island home. Well, I guess I do, but it's way too big and full of northerners. Offshore seems relatively content with whatever it is he does, shuttling between the mainland and Tracey Island at regular intervals.

    Panda Bear - Use of upper case is inversely proportional to level of education, so I can only presume Panda is a professor emeritus by now.

    Pen - I can't do a Finnish accent. It's somewhere in the weird void between Welsh and Indian. You know, when you're on a nice quiet walk in the forest, suicidal thoughts warded off for another nine-month winter, and all of a sudden you're attacked by Jiffy Davies on one side and Javagal Srinath on the other.

    Pepe - Seems to spend most of his time ing his away around the board's more erroneous posts. It's a life, I suppose. Loves his sim racing which is a tick from me.

    phonics - Coming home. I hope he enjoys the absolute pile of rubble he is going to find. He might get busted in his pubic beard returning through Folkestone with a belt of marijuana for Dalston. But he'll be fine.

    Pleb - When I played junior cricket there was a lad called Paul Reynolds who used to play in our team (these being the dying days of when kids could still be called Paul). One match we played, under 14, a catch went up towards Paul. I remember watching the ball zip into the air, about ten feet above his head, and then begin its predictable arc back towards the earth, a planet with which it then made unencumbered contact a couple of seconds later. You see, this was a windy day in June, and big white clumps of pollen had been blowing across the pitch from the row of trees by the railway line, on the other side of the ground. Paul, rather than paying attention to the match or the cricket ball coming towards him, had instead been excitedly leaping to and fro, trying to catch the pollen in his hand. I imagine Pleb and Paul to be of a mind.

    Queenslander - I sometimes need to put his posts through Google translate but apart from that he's cool as.

    randomlegend - Everyone needs a thing. Lord knows I've had a few. RL's is football transfer gossip and its veracity. It's great to have a thing. It makes the mind happy to have a thing. The key is to recognise that your thing is not everybody else's thing, so when others wade naked and innocent onto the territory of your thing, it does not make anyone happy to bark at them like a dog, confused as to why these strange and stupid people have wandered into its garden. It is better to educate them at their own pace with a gentle tongue. I'm done feuding with him, tbh. Life's too short.

    Raoul Duke - So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in London and look East, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark - that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back.

    Reg - Good poster, though not as good as his namesake from the old board. Enjoy his takes on football.

    ScousePig - I seem to remember this name being a nickname he had at school. Must be odd to carry that deep into adult life. It's aged quite well, so he must have done, too.

    Serj - Hmm. The hills are alive. I know nothing about him so I'm going to presume that he strolls the streets of Salzburg, like Max, fixing for the Baroness.

    Shindig - The way he segues from the post he is following, into the topic that he actually wants to post about, can be quite abrupt. The problem with setting up US Opens in the modern era is that with the additional distance afforded by technology, there is a very fine balance to be struck between growing up the rough and keeping the course fair in terms of firmness. If you grow the rough up too high you are actually only giving the long hitters an even greater advantage, as they can wedge it onto the green from the thick stuff, but the shorter hitters further back having to drill out of the cabbage with mid-irons have no chance. In my view the best defence of these courses is to keep the greens as firm as you can, and if that isn't possible due to weather, make sure the pin positions are as evil as possible. That way you reward quality and not quantity.

    SincereTheRebel - Other than a fondness for eating high on the hog, I doubt we have much in common, but I still enjoy every one of his posts without fail.

    Sir Andy Mahowry - Clearly had a difficult time in many ways but still finds lots to enjoy. Good on him.

    Smjffy - The complete opposite of me. Lives a life of impulsive chaos. And why not? Hopefully the next few years will be good ones.

    Spammer - Other than his record of storming off the board at the drop of a hat, his penchant for extravagant sexual practices, and his decision to walk from Leeds to Sheffield and strike up conversations with strangers along the way, I would say that Hammer is perfectly suited to a career as a counsellor.

    Spikey M - Spikey's story is in many ways the story of many of us on TTH. He joins in the 2000s, presumably as a teenager who has time to play loads of FM (this being before social media has really taken off). Life isn't all that. He does crazy shit. He gets a board gimmick (the small head stuff). He posts a picture of himself in a pink skirt that is still burned into my brain like something from Vietnam. He goes to uni. He disappears for a while. Quite some while, I think, in his case. Then he comes back and it's all a bit different. The FM is on the sidelines, and our starry eyes have all glazed over now. He's made something of himself. There's the wife, there are kids, there's a job. It's all fine, just fine. Isn't it? Then covid comes, and heads start to go. Where this story ends, who can predict. I think Spikey will handle it better than most of us, just like he's handled the last 20 years better than most of us. It probably doesn't feel like that, to him, but then it never does.

    Spoonsky - I have spent a day in Utah. The two things I primarily remember about it were having to eat native American food (awful), and this being all over the local news: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Lori_Hacking. It was quite early on in the case, i.e. she had just disappeared and the search was on. The next day I moved on to Nevada, and forgot all about it - until now. I see it turned out to be the husband. It usually is. I don't really know what Spoons is up to these days but he is a nice kid (probably about 28 by now, but you'll always be a kid to me) so good luck to him. I sense he is unlikely to murder his wife.

    SvN - Reading his posts in the jobs thread makes me never want to be anyone's boss. In my head I'd be the perfect boss: calm, firm but fair, understanding, and a brilliant motivator. I'd create an atmosphere where I'm a friend first, boss second. Perhaps an entertainer third. In reality, of course, I would be a quivering mess who melted into gloop on the floor as soon as anyone tried pulling a fast one. SvN seems to have the minerals to deal with that sort of thing. I always go back to that scene in Moneyball when Brad Pitt teaches Jonah Hill how to fire people. Even then, though, it's baseball players. You can't pull some wet fish into your office as a boss in the real world and just say: 'Carlos, you've been traded to the Tigers'. Unless he got a job at Frosties, I suppose.

    TG09 - Is this a glitch in the matrix? It sounds like the chassis number of something with a Yamaha engine which blew up under Martin Brundle in the early 90s.

    The Merse - Would make a good addition to Arsenal Fan TV, if it ever wanted to lose thousands of viewers.

    thommo - The Cottage always feels to me a bit like the Globe, and probably with a similar clientele. You know the ones. Cunts with binoculars. Ruddy-cheeked tossers who just want to see a damn good game of footie. Pricks who remember Guy Goma but not Alain Goma. People who bring picnics. It's bad enough at the cricket, but you simply shouldn't be allowed to visit a football ground if you've been to Waitrose or M&S on the same day. Football is about working class pride, or, in my case, being uncomfortably adjacent to other people's working class pride and sort of going along with it. Football doesn't work at Fulham. They should be relocated to Uxbridge.

    Vercetti - Assuming he changed his username away from 'Pards' around the time that the man himself was relieved of his duties at West Ham United London, that's fifteen years he's been phoning in an existence on here. Pull your fucking finger out before I start referring to you as 'Verc'.

    Waffdon - I umpire cricket now, and each week I get sent to do a game wherever in the league, and am paired up with another umpire. The other week I was paired with a man called Bruce. Bruce, like me, is a Chelsea fan. He has followed them home and away and not missed a game for 25 years. He was in Stockholm, in Moscow, in Munich, he's been everywhere following the Blues. Even luckier for him was that he lives in Aldershot, so for many years, he was able to go to every single reserve and youth game as well (which they played at Aldershot Town, prior to Cobham and then the more recent move to Kingstonian). Bruce was rattling off full XIs from reserve team games 20 years ago. He remembers Mickey Droy. He swears blind that Charly Musonda was the best ever to come through the Chelsea youth system. He said that Mason Mount was always gonna make it - you could just tell. If you cut Bruce, he would bleed blue, and when he bled to death, his dying words would be 'Oh Dennis Wise, scored a fucking great goal, with ten minutes to go, in the San Siro'. Even then, I doubt Bruce loves Chelsea as much as Waff does.

    wullie - I think he has a huge case to answer as far as starting the pandemic is concerned. Hear me out on this. First of all, he only posts to talk about things like selling a house, buying a house, moving house, and bringing up children. Onerous, life-dominating tasks. Alibi, if anyone accused him of having had the time to plan and execute a deadly global pandemic? Sorted. Next - and this is where you'll gasp - think about it. Coronavirus, otherwise known as SARS-CoV-2. That's right. SARS: Sisu Are Really Shit. CoV: need I say more. 2: that's the number of MILLENNIA he will spend in jail if this gets out. Now, you may say innocent until proven guilty, but I haven't seen him deny it once. Something must be done.

    Yeldoow - Is this Black Country for 'You'll do?' Got nothing else.

    Yevrah - You know what should really be a sitcom? His life. The sitcom would be called 'Yevrah', obviously. The premise is that a man in his early 40s has a successful career but is slowly becoming more and more deranged as the world goes to pot around him. Every episode starts with him ranting at his broom at night, glass of something in hand. Each series has a side arc of his house becoming infested with a different animal: rats, then bats, then frogs, cockroaches, dolphins etc until we get decommissioned. There will have to be a love interest, of course; Amy next door seems a worthy recipient of this title. I think the full on ranting maniac character, slowly losing his grip on reality, like a nouveau Basil Fawlty without the snobbery, would do big numbers on Channel 4 or maybe even BBC2, and find an even better home on Dave thereafter. A period piece about heads having gone. I don't know how to write screenplays, but I'm sure someone on TTH can do the honours.

  37. #137
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    Write a book, Jimmy. I mean that, not some pithy commentary on the list.

  38. #138
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Shit lists.

  39. #139
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Firstly, that Yevrah entry got a proper lol. Brilliant and DS is the man to make it happen.

    Secondly, I fear my head may already be too far gone Jim. Not least because your reference to Arthur in Ians entry had me immediately thinking of the Aardvark of CBBC fame, and I was desperately trying to work out which character John Gielgud was and why he had a surname but Arthur didn't.

    Send help.

  40. #140
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I also read Boydys entry as "I'm glad he's found his ceiling" and thought that was particularly harsh.

    It's too hot.

  41. #141
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    That’s not a million miles off the idea I had for a sitcom Jim.

    The thing I’ll never do that’s on my mind at the moment though is stand up.

  42. #142
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    That Waff entry is superb.

  43. #143
    heavy like led Dark Soldier's Avatar
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    I'll write an episode tomorrow.

  44. #144
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Excellent list, Jimmy. I think you're bestowing a subtlety on me I don't actually have (or use on here, at least) and I haven't seen Arthur but I'll take it all as a compliment.

    I'll put the air of world-weary melancholy in some of those entries down to the general state of things rather than assuming you've been on the afternoon sherries.

  45. #145
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Thought that said Public beard not Pubic beard and thought Jimmy was trying to out me.

  46. #146
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    Good lists, lads.

    I escaped Brum, 7om. Live in a village in Warwickshire. It's nice. Not enough chavs though.

  47. #147
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mellberg View Post
    Good lists, lads.

    I escaped Brum, 7om. Live in a village in Warwickshire. It's nice. Not enough chavs though.
    Good to hear. I drove through the city centre a few days ago and it’s a wreck.

  48. #148
    Just Luca, but still a DJ Luca's Avatar
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    That’s a fantastic list, but he has me all wrong. I’m a skinny-to-regular-sized man.

    Apropos of nothing, Floyd strikes me as the kind of guy who, if he one day decided to bin off hawking greasy engines to even greasier Frenchmen and lolled his way through an MBA (you’re already in sales mate, your soul is sold), would double the squillions earned by his mates in the City. It may not be what he wants to do, but he’s a brilliant communicator (we see that here, but I recall him being very sharp when we met) and a logical thinker, and that’s pretty much all you need in THE BUSINESS WORLD (and #2 is really optional if you’re good at #1).

    The cricket and golf stuff will solidify your appeal (not that kind) to the old white men in power as well.
    Last edited by Luca; 22-07-2021 at 04:43 PM.

  49. #149
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    When I was going to have to Google the second word of my entry I got no further into it but some of the other ones are good. I’m going to presume/hope it was insulting anyway.

  50. #150
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Red face

    Quote Originally Posted by Mellberg View Post
    Good lists, lads.

    I escaped Brum, 7om. Live in a village in Warwickshire. It's nice. Not enough chavs though.
    Get out of my county you dirty villa cunt.

    Nah, cool, good for you. Whereabouts, roughly? I feel I've asked this before, in which case I'm sorry.

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