The NFL Thread

[Dan]

I’m thinking about watching some 2024 guys this evening while I’m still interested so I’ll keep you posted.

Having just looked at a few lists of eligible players we’re set for a loaded QB class - Caleb Williams is the favourite to be the man but Drake Maye has put himself in the conversation & Quinn Ewers was the number one player in that recruiting class, then we have Cameron Ward who’s the traits guy, some reclamation projects in DJ Uiagalelei & Spencer Rattler, Deion’s kid Shedur Sanders & about 8000 super seniors who could get drafted with a good season.

[Foe]

Caleb Williams will be the top pick, to someone like Washington or the Raiders. Ewers is super talented too but he needs to stay healthy this year, he’s missing too many games.

[Dan]

Yeah, I’ve started with Caleb & you can immediately see why he’s the top guy early on, he’s a five tool player. He’s not perfect, obviously, but everything is there for him to become a dude.

[Dan]

Who could ever have predicted the Steelers taking Joey Porter Jr?

Will Levis to the Titans at 33. Who’s the common comp for him? Yep, Ryan Tannehill. Cardinals continuing to stack 2024 picks that they’re definitely not going to use on a QB Kyler, don’t worry…

[Dan]

Quick thoughts on the notable classes so far:

- Giants & Steelers have been very good, I like all their picks although that Giants WR room still looks extremely weird. In general most teams are putting together at least a decent class

- Despite stealing Brian Branch the Lions are still on a strange one, as are the Jags & 49ers, and I’m not a huge fan of the Saints’ day two picks either.

- The Dolphins shouldn’t be allowed to have Devon Achane, and the Seahawks need to calm down with running backs.

- We got a kicker Sounds like we might get a few punters today & maybe a long snapper too if we’re lucky.

[Dan]

A few round four notes:

- Eagles going back to the Georgia defense bargain store that seemingly only they are allowed to shop at.

- Colts stacking up freaks with Adetomiwa Adeboware.

- Saints, Rams & Raiders getting good backup QBs in Jake Haener, Stetson Bennett & Aidan O’Connell respectively.

- Browns drafting 365lb OT Dawand Jones to go with 340lb DT Siaki Ika.

- Patriots just drafting straight from the Bill Belichick handbook with a bunch of small school dudes & a kicker then trading back.

- Steelers having a great draft by just picking people that are related to guys already in the building.

[phonics]

Looks like the Eagles GM is desperate to answer the ‘could a college team win in the NFL’ hypothetical.

[Gray Fox]

You didn't say DAWG enough.

[Ian]

I think DeMarvion Overshown is getting my Name of the Draft award this year.

[Foe]

I like bumper pool out of Arkansas.

[Ian]

Sadly I had to discount Bumper for not being his birth name, like some of the Juices and Sauces we've had in recent years.

[Dan]

You’ve also got the likes of SirVocea Dennis, Habakkuk Baldonado, Israel Abanikanda (all three are from Pitt, who also had Calijah Kancey & Deslin Alexandre), Xazavian Valladay, Nesta Jade Silvera, Malaesala Aumavae-Laulu, Jovaughn Gwyn and, last but not least, Jacky Chen.

Next years early favourite is Alabama CB Kool-Aid McKinstry, which obviously isn’t his real name but he still makes the list as his actual name is Ga’Quincy McKinstry.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://nypost.com/2023/05/10/bo-jac..._medium=social

Good to see that Bo has tried all the usual remedies in his fight against hiccups.

[Gray Fox]

The Cardinals just cut DeAndre Hopkins knowing they'll be stuck with near $23m in dead cap for the season.

Brain dead management.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Please sign him EDC.

[Ben]

He just wanted to play with a QB who is dedicated to football, and they sided with the Call of Duty addict.

[Foe]

Well that went well on banner party day.

The chiefs just don’t have a weapon when Kelce is out. Don’t think I’ve seen so many fuck ups from a single player as Toney last night in a game. If he wasn’t so good he’d be binned for that.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jawaan Taylor also had a bad night.

He was lined up too deep and false started on pretty much every play. Although the refs kept letting him get away with it.

[Ian]

The best previews you're gonna get:
https://www.theonion.com/2023-nfl-se...nfc-1850806239
https://www.theonion.com/2023-nfl-se...afc-1850808622

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've missed NFL Sunday's so much.

Scott Hanson

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bijan Robinson is very damn good.

The moves he put on for that TD were lovely.

[Foe]

He just belongs.

That’s why I love college football. It was so unbelievably obvious that he was an NFL stud, yet there he was, lining up in Austin against future accountants for a year more than he really needed.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Zay Flowers also belongs. He is so damn shifty.

He already looks like what we wanted from Hollywood but he was never able to do it.

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[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Dobbins apparently has torn his Achilles

My sweet boy is dead.

Edit: Confirmed, fuck.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

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[thommo]

49ers absolutely took the air out of the Steelers balloon. I still think we'll have a good season but that was a bump back down to earth against probably the best team in the NFC.

Still, it could be worse. The Giants for instance...

[Gray Fox]

Tough to digest opener for the Eagles. Went into the week thinking we were up with San Fran and Dallas as best in the NFC, but this was not pretty.

The defence looked about the same and got us out to a grand 16-0 lead, but the offence just seemed to falter over and over. Now it was hammering it down for most of the game, so it's not quite as bad as it might be, but to let Mac fucking Jones have multiple attempts at pulling off the late win is criminal.

I'm hopeful it's just week 1 cobwebs being blown off combined with some bad weather. Going to have to be on it quickly if we wish to keep pace with what looks like a sharp pair in 49ers and Cowboys.

[Ben]

Aaron Rodgers Jets' career lasted four snaps.

[Ian]

Pah, nothing sitting in a dark room with some crystals won't fix.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I do believe in crystal skulls.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

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Bonkers.

[niko_cee]

Brilliant game management by Gino Smith there.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fuck the Bengals

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Seahawks were so lucky, that holding on the final play was mental.

[Ben]

Some awful refereeing in that game. The intentional grounding call was terrible.

[Baz]

Nice to see Lamar Jackson has finally woken up

[thommo]

Chubb out for the season and maybe more. Knee completely fucked, genuinely felt sick seeing a replay. That's one of the worst I've ever seen.

[Ben]

Someone in our fantasy football WhatsApp posted a still photo of it. Horrible.

[Gray Fox]

Same knee he obliterated in 2015. Would have had a monster year again too.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

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So good.

Also there's this in the replies:

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The very same guy ran onto the field to block someone on an interception return last year.

Clearly he's not the brightest lad.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

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Superb.

[Foe]

The Texans looking almost capable.

The broncos still sucking after all the faff with trades is great.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I really like the Texans this year.

They've got the potential to be good on offence.

Nico Collins and Tank Dell look very good.

[Foe]

I assumed putting up a fight against the ravens in game 1 meant they were decent. Didn’t realise the ravens were not that good. Struggling at home here against the colts minus Taylor and Richardson.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fullback for the Texans with a kick return TD

[Ben]

I can’t recall a FB returning a kickoff or punt for a TD ever. I mean, obviously it would have happened years ago back in the day of dual and triple threat players but surely not in recent times?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

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So good.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I assumed putting up a fight against the ravens in game 1 meant they were decent. Didn’t realise the ravens were not that good. Struggling at home here against the colts minus Taylor and Richardson.

Have you seen our injury list?

RB 1 & 2 out, WR 3 out, LT out, C out, OLB 1 out, FS 1 out and CB 1 out.

[Ian]

This is the first time I've been able to watch Denver this season. I am not enjoying it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Gus Williams, RB 3 now down.