That's the most 2023 post of the year.
That's the most 2023 post of the year.
No one wants the full conversation.
39 people do, apparently.
Is this a relapse?
I read it. It was good in a way, since I could receive all the benefits of mind-altering drugs without the expense or need for seedy underworld contacts.
We are 365 24/7 so 6 unlucky souls have to share the 6am-10pm in mini shifts. I'm doing the 7.20-10 one which is fine, just turn my laptop on and take the literal one or two calls we're likely to get.
IT bloke assured me I had definitely set my laptop up to work from home with the authenticator thing. Apparently not, lol. So I'm heading to the office. Fuck sake.
We do get paid for a full shift so it's effectively triple pay so I'm more than happy to do it. Spose at least this means I avoid any surprise visits from aunts and uncles.
My first trip of 2024 will be next week, we're doing a day trip to St Quentin in France. Me, the boss, and another boss. They've booked the shuttle for a time that requires me to reach Folkestone at 6am. Magic darts.
I thought I'd been on some daft timed trips in my time, but 6am at Folkestone and no sign of a hotel on expenses the night before (I'm assuming?) takes some beating.
In fairness, probably the best time of day to be taking on the M20.
Nope. Meet at the office at 4.30am and the boss is driving me down. It's then 2 hours from Calais to destination. Will be a top day with some excellent professionalism on show.
Still beats getting into Asuncion airport at 3.30am before an all-day customer meeting at 9am, mind. That was an all-time low.
Yeah, your South America trip must have violated the Geneva convention...
I actually look back on it fondly, as one of the most insane things that it's possible to do with what is basically an office job, not least for the fact that my travelling companion was 79 years old. They're finally getting rid of him this year and having been turned down by me, they're now replacing him with his son. Good to see that primogeniture still has a place in the 21st century.
Does his son even work for the company?I may have missed a key detail here...
His son is probably a shiftless layabout but has the crucial qualification of being his son.
"What? No of course he doesn't have any experience, but he did tumble out of my wife's vagina and you can't put a price on that sort of qualification."
"Don't worry. I'll keep an eye on him. He's only 53."
"He fucking loves going to South America too, he'd do it for peanuts."
Genuine lol at that line.Originally Posted by Ian
His son is about 40 and previously worked for Walmart. I understand that was in the HQ offices rather than behind the till or stacking shelves, but he left them a couple of years ago to take some time off work following a messy divorce (all of this is happening in Mexico City). Nevertheless, owing to the hereditary principle he was as Ian states the obvious choice to succeed his father as Latam sales manager responsible for around £1.5 million of business per year.
So he’s never had a customer facing role? Outstanding. Assuming the pe vultures aren’t aware of the full extent of what’s happening here? Does it lap mean you get to dovetail around the favelas with someone even less equipped for the role than the incumbent?
No, it means he gets to do it on his own and I'm lined up for Europe instead (I'm confirmed as taking France from April as my first country all of my own).
Poland, Germany, Belgium and the Netherlands are my next targets for expansion after that, if the European field manager can be ousted, who is also now 73. Spain and Portugal should also be gettable but could be harder as he is moving to Spain for good and it sounds like he intends to work those markets until he dies.
All of the above represent a much better deal both financially and lifestyle wise than dodging around kidnap hotspots for chicken feed commission. Meanwhile I've had the Arab offering me Lebanon because the customers there are Christian and won't talk to him. 100% amped for knobbing around Beirut.
Can't wait to read Jim's posts in 2030 moaning about the man in Europe retaining his corpse-like grip on those markets as his 80th birthday approaches.
After which he retires and they give Europe to his son.
But hey, he once had a lemonade stand so he knows sales.
Last edited by Adramelch; 03-01-2024 at 12:32 AM.
Billy Britain dealing with the French
Half a year into that job that bumped me 70% pay wise, and I'm seriously starting to question my decision. It's not a lot of work, I can basically manage it easy on 2 days in the office + attending meetings for the rest of the week, but my god the place is soul sucking. I know it's generally a joke when companies sell theirs as something positive, but there is no "culture" at all. I know personal things about maybe 2 colleagues (all the devs in my team are contractors so while they are nice, they generally don't give much of a shit in terms of building connections), and it's filled with middle-aged clock-in/clock-out types.
Also, I have never been in a big organization that manages things through projects before, and it's terrifying. The amount of meetings I need to sit in on where 10-15 people just sit and stare while two people have a conversation is absurd. Coming from slightly more mature start-up environments, I didn't think the contrast would be this big.
I am in early stages for a role that would be pretty much my ideal step back to the track I want to be on, but it would mean a 20% gross/15% net hit to my salary (their recruiter basically gated the conversation on me pre-negotiating and saying I was ok with the "range" which was really just a specific number). I really don't know if I value my sanity that much, although I think I will turn into a shell of myself if I stay at the current one for years.
Last edited by Bernanke; 03-01-2024 at 11:36 PM.
That sounds like an appallingly run company. 15 people in a meeting where only two are talking is a waste of 15 people's time, so fuck only knows what other examples of this shit are strewn throughout the organisation.
It's a huge company and profitable by some margin, and I'm within IT so there's very little pressure to actually be efficient.
The civil service is this but with many, many more people having their time wasted.
My dad's first reaction when I described how the first couple of weeks were was "that almost sounds like a state job".
Sack it off and get a job you like. You’ll get used to having less money.
I'm a twit
Jut tell yourself you got a 36% pay rise last year.
If you're working in tech (as something like a PM, it sounds like) then there's a million jobs out there. Just start applying for companies you actually want to work at
God, being back at work is shit.
I actually feel quite ready to go back, but I’ve still got four more days off.
I'm a twit
I've had a week full of problems. Starting up sites again after a shutdown never goes well and this is no exception. Looked at holidays last night because the slog to Easter is killing me already.
Overpaid, underworked, soul-sucking environment surrounded by old zombies, "projects", pointless meetings...safe to say I felt incredibly attacked by that Bernanke post initially.
Having thought about it though, do I want it any other way? Do I want to be constantly challenged? Do I want daily table-tennis games with the Finance lot? Do I want to build meaningul personal connections? Do I want to partake in some precious cultural phenomenon overmarketed by Swedish nonces like taking it in turns to penetrate a warm pastry every day, giving it a name like Sknöbbingen and pretending it's all leading to a fantastic improvement in my Men's Mental Health?
Best not to get ideas above one's station at this pivotal time in the world, ChatGPT 5.5 is about to make us so obsolete we'll be communicating in monkey calls and buulding figurines out of our own excrement to pretend to maintain a semblance of control/power/relevance.
I felt like that on Wednesday. The feeling quickly dissipated yesterday.
My colleague is currently preparing for a Finland sales trip.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/weather/643492
And then it's going to be positive celsius by Tuesday. That's a hell of a swing. Surely not normal?
I'd still prefer those clear skies and (harsh)cold to the deluge of rain we've had for a month straight.
From RollOnFriday:
Partners at the London office of Simpson Thacher & Bartlett have cancelled holiday cover and binned the ability to carry over unused vacation days, telling junior lawyers how irritated they are with them. Merry Christmas, one and all!
In emails which achieve impressive levels of humbuggery, Tom Lloyd, a partner in the firm’s real estate finance team, and Jason Glover, the firm’s London Managing Partner, showed just how much yellow snow lawyers at STB are expected to eat in return for their supersized salaries (£158k for NQs).
“I wanted to drop a note around Christmas working and holiday cover”, opened Lloyd on Wednesday afternoon.
His message started well enough, albeit in a begrudging tone. “Firstly I'm happy for everyone to work from home tomorrow as I appreciate many of you will be seeking to travel tomorrow evening ahead of Christmas. This applies to associates, paralegals and assistants.”
But then he kicked out Tiny Tim's crutches.
“Secondly: there will be no cover for holiday leave 27-29 December. It will likely be very quiet but everyone is expected to pick up things that come in on their transactions that are urgent in that time. Everyone is expected to have their laptop with them wherever they are (this is a general expectation when on holiday not just for this).”
Having established that there shall be no escape from work, ever, anywhere, Lloyd expressed his annoyance with his team.
“Unfortunately we have had a huge amount of very late holiday requests due to people not using their full allowance during the year.”
“This has been quite disappointing and, being honest, irritating.”
“You all need to manage your holiday allowance better next year and everyone has had plenty of opportunity to take their holidays", he groused.
“What this means is that we will not be offering cover for anyone during the first week of January, much like 27-29 December, for holiday leave.”
Lloyd explained that he wasn’t cancelling cover out of spite, but “so everyone is treated the same and we can approve the holiday requested and not have to have people losing their holiday allowance.”
In fact the partners were lovely people: “We (as a partner group) try to always be understanding of holiday requests and provide cover as much as possible - however what we have seen this year has put us in difficult positions, and put time pressures on us unnecessarily due to a lack of planning by requesters regarding cover and holiday leave and so we will need to be more stringent on this.”
And so, for the lawyers’ own good, from next year they will no longer be permitted to carry over their unused holiday: “Unless we cancel someone’s pre-approved holiday, we will not be approving any carryover of holiday from 2024 to 2025”, said Lloyd.
“People need to plan ahead better”, he concluded. And if that isn’t a lovely Christmas message to your team, ROF doesn’t know what is.
Luckily Glover was on hand to, erm, lend his support to Lloyd’s approach. In a similarly festive email to the entire office on Monday, the London Managing Partner reminded staff that “With the Christmas holiday period fast approaching, I wanted to” – thank staff? Wish them Merry Christmas? – “clarify working arrangements between Christmas and the New Year as there appears to be a degree of confusion.” Oh.
“Each of Wednesday 27th, Thursday 28th and Friday 29th are working days with the Wednesday and Thursday being core office days where attendance is expected”, he said.
“Friday is a day when you are permitted to work from home”, he allowed, “although the office will be open for those who wish to come in. Cheers.” It brings a tear to the eye, so it does.
Lawyers at the firm who've been working more hours than Santa's elves in crunch time and cancelled holiday plans throughout the year were irked. “Some Christmas cheer from STB”, said one insider. “Not even K&E is this overtly outrageous or offensive”.
“Delivering a firm message to associates whilst simultaneously expecting them to work >2000 hours per year and sacrifice every weekend, evening and holiday… and their mental and physical health”, said a source.
ROF emailed Glover for comment, but he wasn't around: "I am away from the office returning Tuesday 2nd January. I will be picking up e-mails infrequently". If only his associates could say the same.
Fair enough, what's the issue?
It's a US law firm in London paying top dollar. It's hardly something you go into expecting an easy life.
I'm not exactly Corbyn but I reckon if I'm on £158k in a non-managerial position I know that they're not just paying me that because of how great a legal talent I am.
Love ROF.
I luckily managed to get Christmas to New Year's off at my firm but made the error of working the final Friday before Christmas instead. Was a touch grim having to work late into the evening to cover other people's matters that simply "had to" conclude before Christmas.
I don't know many firms that won't let you carry holiday over but I, same as others, struggle to have too much sympathy for those at US firms. Just accept that you've given up your life until you leave.
Was hoping Mert was going to pop up somewhere in the article.
Always thought working for a US firm was a point blank stupid thing to do. If that's what you want just go straight to Goldmans or wherever.
Sacked the pensioner on Wednesday. It wasn't too bad, he was very gracious and understanding about it. By far my favourite sacking so far, even though I hated it.
I can't get my head around the idea that there are people out there my dad's age who are graphic designers. He can barely adjust the brightness on his PC.
Sounds like he isn’t one anymore to be fair.
Have you had much contact with your lady colleague over Christmas?
Edit: Re Kikó post, I completely agree with the directors re late AL bookings. It's fucking annoying.
My France trip next week is off because the Frenchman concerned has broken his foot and has to lie in bed for six weeks. Perhaps the Frenchest cancellation in the history of France.
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote