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Thread: Coronavirus Death Thread

  1. #11701
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    He did that dementia test.
    He could probably do with having one. Something's cracked up there.

  2. #11702
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Hands, face, space, put a donk on it.

  3. #11703
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I can see 'wash your face' causing a lot of problems without more precise instructions.

  4. #11704
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    I get home and there's no fucking power.

    The end is nigh.

  5. #11705
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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  6. #11706
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Person, man, woman, camera, dog.

  7. #11707
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Live, laugh, sesh.

  8. #11708
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kikó View Post
    Person, man, woman, camera, dog.
    This just turns into Daft Punk every time I read it.

  9. #11709
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Another great example of people complaining about people doing things they themselves are currently doing on the news this evening with people getting off the train in Brighton complaining about how busy the train was.

  10. #11710
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    People have so little imagination. Hot day = go to the beach. Why? Are there not places inland you can sunbathe?

  11. #11711
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Toggle Spoiler


    JFC. For context, the pop is 86% white and 7% Asian.

  12. #11712
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    People have so little imagination. Hot day = go to the beach. Why? Are there not places inland you can sunbathe?
    It tends to be cooler by the coast.

    I suppose you could go to some sort of reservoir and have a nice Stand By Me type experience.

  13. #11713
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Flight update: flying in a mask is shit. Also turbulence is shit.

  14. #11714
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Did you change it after 2 hours?
    I'm a twit

  15. #11715
    I used to be funny.
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    He said a domestic flight. You'd not get near 2 hours on the plane.

  16. #11716
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    He said a domestic flight. You'd not get near 2 hours on the plane.
    + time spent in the airport.
    I'm a twit

  17. #11717
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Why is flying in a mask shit? Does it get in the way of the champagne and canapes?

  18. #11718
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    It stops him spitting on the dregs of society when they look at him.

  19. #11719
    I used to be funny.
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    I have a serious question: Did all your luggage have to be checked in now or is hand luggage still ok to take onboard?

  20. #11720
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-53612230

    Onya lad. I saw about a hundred of them crowded outside the mosque this morning, so we'll probably be next.

  21. #11721
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    It is a crazy world we live in where you get lambasted for seemingly simply pointing out a fact (EDIT: while also seemingly trying to help), but there we are.
    Last edited by Yevrah; 31-07-2020 at 09:39 PM.

  22. #11722
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yevrah View Post
    It is a crazy world we live in where you get lambasted for seemingly simply pointing out a fact, but there we are.
    The world now is all about who you can criticise and who is untouchable.

  23. #11723
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    You're telling me. I told them all to go home and they got a bit shirty about it.

  24. #11724
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Im stocking up on masks now for the first time. Gonna go all out and get some New Japan ones because Im a child.

  25. #11725
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Twitter shilling desperately hard for it being pubs and beaches with all the nasty white people. 40% Asian, lads. 40% Asian. Mind-blowing stuff.

  26. #11726
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    It gives you some idea of how/why all the grooming stuff was ignored.

  27. #11727
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    If it's pubs, why isn't there a uniform uptick across the whole country?

    Are drinkers in Bradford, Leicester, Rochdale, Blackburn etc the only ones who get pissed enough not to socially distance?

  28. #11728
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Was out in London all day and had a crackimg day until it got to 10pm onwards and I had to search through the corpses of all form of nightlife that was slaughtered.

    What's this Asian angle to this, 40% of all cases are Asian? I need to be clearly informed before I start blasting out friendly fire.

  29. #11729
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    The general consensus is that they generally work high risk jobs. Be it rich Asian dr's or shop owners or poor Asian workers in factories and 'sweat shops'. Plus, they are a far more social society then other races and often live in larger family units.

  30. #11730
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Don View Post
    Was out in London all day and had a crackimg day until it got to 10pm onwards and I had to search through the corpses of all form of nightlife that was slaughtered.

    What's this Asian angle to this, 40% of all cases are Asian? I need to be clearly informed before I start blasting out friendly fire.
    I posted the recent weekly positive case stats higher up on this page. Basically the white (and black) number has been decreasing steadily and the Asian number isn't going anywhere, which is what is driving this set of northern lockdowns but no one can say it.

    One can draw one's own conclusions as to why this is, sympathetically or otherwise, but it's a fact.

  31. #11731
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by niko_cee View Post
    Why is flying in a mask shit? Does it get in the way of the champagne and canapes?
    Best you can get is a Tunnocks on a Logan air.

    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    I have a serious question: Did all your luggage have to be checked in now or is hand luggage still ok to take onboard?
    Nope. Can still bring hand luggage on.

  32. #11732
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I’d travel myself for a Tunnocks.

  33. #11733
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Tea Cake or Caramel?

  34. #11734
    I used to be funny.
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    I think it's the Caramels. <books flight to Aberdeen immediately>

  35. #11735
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I’d meant tea cake but now that you mention it the bars are fairly epic too.

  36. #11736
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I was needing to choose a suitable set of chocolatey/biscuity things this morning to cover a couple of days' cricket, had a good long look at the Tunnocks Caramel but ended up choosing Nature Valley oats and honey. Already in my bottom 5 worst life decisions.

  37. #11737
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    You’ve a had a mare there.

  38. #11738
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Do they still lie about how many they sell on the packet, or are there people tucked away in the highlands eating 1000 a day?

  39. #11739
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I was needing to choose a suitable set of chocolatey/biscuity things this morning to cover a couple of days' cricket, had a good long look at the Tunnocks Caramel but ended up choosing Nature Valley oats and honey. Already in my bottom 5 worst life decisions.
    This is genuinely tragic. There's literally not a worse bar on the shelf.

    Maybe Alpen. Fuck Alpen.

  40. #11740
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    The dark chocolate tunnocks are top effort too.

  41. #11741
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    No. Harvest bars. Lunch box ruiners they were.

  42. #11742
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    I think it's the Caramels. <books flight to Aberdeen immediately>


    Join us.

  43. #11743
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    Caramel wafers and tea cakes are my go to snack to take offshore so that the operators tolerate having me there.

    Chuck a tea cake in the fridge if you want to improve it’s taste

    The caramel log splits opinion though. I’m in the “totally average” camp.

    Still better than a nature valley bar though you absolute mentalist. Would’ve been better with a packet of rich tea.

  44. #11744
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Never seen the caramel log before.

  45. #11745
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I think some logic ran through my brain about health and the fact they wouldn't melt in the car, and somehow this warped thinking became an actual purchase. Nature Valley Oats and Honey: a Tunnocks Caramel designed by committee.

  46. #11746
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I posted the recent weekly positive case stats higher up on this page. Basically the white (and black) number has been decreasing steadily and the Asian number isn't going anywhere, which is what is driving this set of northern lockdowns but no one can say it.

    One can draw one's own conclusions as to why this is, sympathetically or otherwise, but it's a fact.
    As Spikey says, it sounds like a fairly straightforward result of Asians doing actual jobs whilst whites hide behind a laptop doing shit that could have been automated 20 years ago. It's not like any one is actually following any social distancing.

  47. #11747
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    There are a lot of whites that do shit jobs too, which makes me think it is indeed all down to these sweatshop type workplaces where everyone's packed in and paid Ł2 an hour in a way chalky wouldn't accept.

  48. #11748
    I used to be funny.
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    Yesterday saw us process 200,000 tests for the first time ever.

  49. #11749
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    66,666.

  50. #11750
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    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-53621613

    Seriously? What on earth are we doing? What is the end game here?

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