Important work being done, get out of the fucking way.
Important work being done, get out of the fucking way.
If only the same approach applied after arriving at said work.
My cunt neighbour ordering shit online when she's never fucking home and my wife continuing to take them in for her. 4 packages are sat in my porch for her. 4. Four. FOUR! it's starting to resemble a pissing sorting office.
Steal the best looking one. They're never going to suspect you're a thief if you hand over the other three.
I’ll say it again, never answer your door unless you’re expecting someone or something.
The joys of a front porch means I don't even need to answer for my own deliveries, unless I'm expecting something expensive.
The diamond for my wife's engagement ring was delivered early morning when I was still asleep but she was up. She didn't answer because she "didn't know who it would be" so it sat in Londis post-office for a week before I could collect it. That was a fun wait.
My PC is 7 stops away. Ho Ho Hurry the fuck up.
According to the tracker it's literally round the corner.
A few weeks ago I had an Amazon delivery which had a delivery window of 11:45am-1pm.Originally Posted by Shindig
My PC is 7 stops away. Ho Ho Hurry the fuck up.
According to the tracker it's literally round the corner.
At 11:15 it was 3 stops away but it was about an hour away.
It was delivered at 8pm and I believe it wasn't until 7:30 that it went to 2 stops away.
Your man stopped to have a little play on it before delivering.
Just being thankful it was that he decided to try out and not your fleshlight.
Well, mines been here for 45 minutes. Logged into my Microsoft Account to be greeted with another person's name.
Spikey is such a cuck.
For coming home to parcels in the porch?
Parcel in the porch does make a good double entendre, admittedly.
Last edited by Spikey M; 10-12-2024 at 10:52 PM.
How much do shops earn for taking Amazon parcels in for collection? I ask because I get most things sent to the Co-op at the bottom of the street, and you always end up with a queue forming behind you whilst they fumble around trying to find it, so unless each parcel comes with a good few pence attached I always wonder whether it's worth their time and effort. The less said about accepting returns the better.
There's nothing more infuriating than seeing the number of stops away tick down 5, 4, 3, 2 and then getting a "sorry, we couldn't deliver your parcel today". Or even a "we tried to deliver your parcel but you weren't in".
A decent amount, that's why they have starting plastering delivery lockers all over train stations as a source of passive revenue.
It varies. I know a guy who runs a corner shop and he gets 35p per parcel from Yodel. Apparently bigger places can get double that.
Funny to see shops go from the place you bought stuff from to the place you pick up the stuff you bought from elsewhere. Might work out better for everyone in the end.
£1.40 basically sat waiting in my porch. Money in the bank baby.
Passive income.
I had a call from a UK mobile number earlier today. A woman with a thick Indian accent stated my name, said she was from dukdukduk Ltd and told me that the call was being recorded. Then she asked me if I'd like to hear about 'investment options in the stock market'. I said that I wouldn't. She said well, you may not be interested now but it could be interesting in the future. I rang off.
What sort of a scam is that? Was it going to be like a Mellin situation where I give her a grand over the phone? Novel stuff.
Next time she calls give her a link to the site. You might not want to become rich but some of us do.
Reminded me of the video below but basically it's a numbers game.
She's been reading here and knows you have the Kit Kat windfall burning a hole in your pocket.
Does the neighbour expect you to go round and drop them off?My cunt neighbour ordering shit online when she's never fucking home and my wife continuing to take them in for her. 4 packages are sat in my porch for her. 4. Four. FOUR! it's starting to resemble a pissing sorting office.
I had a parcel on the stairs for two days for next door. I lost the battle and dropped it off this morning.
I'm a twit
Cuck.
Cadbury heroes. What a pointless affair.
My Mrs finished work for Christmas yesterday and brought home the last of the tub they had at reception for visitors. Jackpot, you might think. Nope. Nothing but Fudge and Éclairs. Atleast with Celebrations it doesn't get worse than a bounty.
Still, atleast it's not a load of toffee coins.
I think I've come to accept that most of the big chocolate assortments are shit. There's always too many of the shit ones.
Just looking at the Heroes selection and they have Wispa, Dairy Milk and Twirl. Those are all just chocolate with nothing else. Pointless. And the creme egg ones are shite. The fudge is shit and although I don't mind the odd eclair, there's always more of them than anything else.
Just give me some ferrero rocher or a box of the red lindt ones.
I got my kids one of these Tiny Tony’s Chocolonely boxes:
I imagine there won't be any left, unlike the dreaded tub of eclairs that's usually around towards New Year.
I'm a twit
I'm yet to try Tony's. I'm worried it might be a gateway chocolate to RL's level of chocnoncery.
I wouldn't worry.
If I'm selling my body for bars of 80% free-trade Colombian in 6 months, that's on you.
I bought some naughty percent chocolate the other day to go into a chilli con carne (try it, it's amazing). Had a square off the side and it went down beautifully. Definitely a slippery slope from there to Bridget Jones territory.
If I'm getting some 80% Colombian, it better not be chocolate.
Cocaine is higher in purity than it's ever been. Yet people are still using ket cos it's cheaper.
Looking forward to a generation of people with no bladder.
I'm a twit
https://www.chocolatetradingco.com/b...-chocolate-bar
This remains the best chocolate I've ever had, but £10 for a small bar is I accept ludicrous.
Willie's chocolate is really good and UK based, which is nice. Price less bonkers.
https://www.williescacao.com/product...v=7885444af42e
The guy also seems like a complete legend and was the inspiration for the best ever story on Off Menu.
There's your gateway drug, Spikey.
"The Porcelana cocoa variety is extremely rare and therefore Amedei only produce a limited amount of Porcelana chocolate each year. The Porcelana is so special that each of the boxes is individually numbered."
Lol.
I've only ordered it once when I was having an exam prep meltdown, but it's so fucking good.
Why are you so weird?
Who knows, but I embraced it a long time ago.
I'm doomed. Cubicles only plz.
Tony's is from the Netherlands, and it's everywhere here. I like the salted caramel one but it's nothing amazingly special overall. The shape of the bars is also a bit annoying as it's in non-cube form, meaning the bits are all random sizes. Really inefficient to eat [/markcorrigan]
The shape of the bars is the only reason it sells so well. People are thick.
Tony's is a terrible name for Dutch chocolate. Cultural Appropriation.
I presume the things I bought will be uniform in shape.
I'm a twit
Yeah that would annoy me. She at least best be attractive next door.
Fudge and éclairs are decent no?
Bounty's are the real crime.
I actually like Bounty now.
Fudge is the pits and Eclairs are just too much hassle and take too much time to enjoy. All that wasted time you could have been shoving other ones into your fat face.
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