The Cricket Thread

[thommo]

I can only imagine the satisfaction in winning that game against the dickheads. Now you need the other club to have the game of their season and win (or have a huge bonus point haul) to subject the dickheads to relegation; much chance of that?

Our league season finished this weekend just gone (I was back in the 2s; didn't play particularly well as we lost by 8 wickets), and the 1s ended up with the equivalent of a final for their last game of the season. 1st v 2nd at our home ground; we had a 6 point advantage going into the weekend so any inclement weather or tie and we'd get promotion (only 1 goes up to the Prem).

We lost the toss and were put in on a really sticky wicket; once again we've had lots of overnight rain over the last week and it was a poor surface for batting. Our captain made 35 but other than that, not many contributions as we were bowled out for 109 in the 47th over. 3 early wickets gave us hope but the opposition really dug in to build a partnership. At 75/3 off 36 overs, it was in their hands but 3 quick wickets brought it back in the balance.

At this point, we've finished our game, had showers, changed and are sitting with a beer waiting for the bus home, ALL checking our phones for the score updates. We end up ringing the captain of the 3s who proceeds to provide TMS-esque coverage down the phone and booming out of a Bluetooth speaker. The balls ticked by to the point where they needed 12 runs off the last 3 overs; our captain proceeds to take a hat-trick in the 48th over, leaving them 9 down. But the last pair continue to get runs, 10 off 12 becomes 6 off 6. They were running everything at this point. 5 off 5.... 3 off 4.... 2 off 3.... 1 off 2....

And then...

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Bus home was bouncing, and many drinks were had back at the club in celebration.

[Ben]

England have signed McCullum to be the white-ball coach too. Whilst I think it will be a fun ride, I can't help but think it shortens his lifespan as Test coach.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's signed up to 2027 which is as long a lifespan as you could hope for. I'm not against it really. We have some horses coming up before then.

[Ben]

Didn't see that. Yeah if he sticks it out until then we've had a good spell from him.

[Danny]

In Div 2 too

Guess who is playing Friday.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Josh Hull bloke is ridiculous. Looks like some absolute carthorse target man that comes off the bench for BATE Borisov. Either it works, or it's Darren Pattinson mk 2.

[Ben]

Baz's take on Josh Hull:

Six foot heaps, left arm, bowls 90

Genuine this.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Six foot heaps of manure. All I can say is that if 'Baz' had had to grow up in our climate and light conditions he wouldn't be quite so fucking chipper about life.

[niko_cee]

The fact that bad light is an absolute threshold rather than an offered thing was such a bad change to the rules. Don't give me any of that danger to the fielder shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've always been a bad light denier. One of my more controversial takes. Yes, it's dangerous. If they die, they die.

[Ben]

Bad light cost us the league last year. Loads of games rained off so we found ourselves 2nd going into the last game despite only losing once. 1.30pm start in mid-September for some unknown reason, came off for bad light needing about 40 to win because our number five almost decapitated the standing umpire. The opposition even offered to toss up some dross for us to get them in a couple of overs because everyone hated the team that ended up winning the league. Surprisingly, the umpires didn't agree to this match fixing offer and called it a draw.

We got promoted anyway but who doesn't love a bad light anecdote on a Friday evening.

[Dquincy]

Sounds like you lost too many games tbf.

[Ben]

We beat top home and away.

[Ben]

Late season drama in our league as the league chairman’s club have been caught RED-HANDED playing someone who is registered in another league too (usually not an issue at lower levels but strictly forbidden in ECB leagues). They’ve had their points from last week stripped and really the only fair punishment if they’ve gone down this route is to take the points in all games this guy has played, which will almost certainly relegate them.

Lol.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Last game of the league today. Absolutely nervous as hell for my lot who have the above mentioned relegation scenario. Meanwhile the cricket gods have determined that my third ever Premier League game is going to be the last one for our big local derby rivals as they are relegated for the first time in 16 years.

Such a silly game.

[Gray Fox]

It'd be nice if one of these could stick with Pope here while he cracks on.

EDIT: Taking full responsibility for that one.

[thommo]

Last game of the league today. Absolutely nervous as hell for my lot who have the above mentioned relegation scenario. Meanwhile the cricket gods have determined that my third ever Premier League game is going to be the last one for our big local derby rivals as they are relegated for the first time in 16 years.

Such a silly game.

If I'm reading it right, the dickheads are down?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yeah. We pissed our game and then it was down to whether one of the other two would lose. Because of rain the games were quite staggered so one of them finished well before the other, and the other club lost, which left the dickheads needing to defend 190 in 27 overs or take 7 wickets in trying which would have kept them up. Instead they lost and went down by a point, cue hilarity.

The real fun part was the previous week they had us 70/4 and in our league you get the first bowling bonus point for taking 5 wickets. Big swirling catch went up with a bloke on 9, their captain dropped it and our guy went on to make 80* and no more wickets were taken in the innings. So it turned out that in that moment he literally dropped them out of the league.

[Danny]

Baz's take on Josh Hull
Genuine this.

Don’t think he has touched 90. The spell I watched yesterday he looked SLOOOOOW.

Edit to echos Thommos at that relegation

[Gray Fox]

Well this seems to have quickly gotten away.

[Ben]

Jamie Smith is the real deal isn't he.

EDIT: Sorry mate. I went to the kitchen the ball before thinking that was tea.

[Danny]

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State of that wicket.

Incredible Coad has never got a look in for England.

[igor_balis]

Ridiculous from Head so far

[Danny]

Rashid

[Danny]

If the ump cant give that run out as in, he might as well go home.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think they send literally every appeal up for that now. Wouldn't want to umpire at that level. Glorified butler.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Jesus mate you've got a finger, use it.

[Danny]

As you said, expecting the tech to take care of it but those were stone dead in real time.

Livingston having his one good game a year to earn his next contract.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Jofra is a fucking joke. If he was always fit we'd piss everything.

[Danny]

Was just coming to post something similar. Such a shame.

[Ben]

Jesus mate you've got a finger, use it.

Awful umpiring.

[Dquincy]

Jesus mate you've got a finger, use it.

What my wife said to me last night.

[Clunge]

Somerset have just won one of the greatest County Championship games of all time. At 4pm, the game was petering out, talks of handshakes. We then bullied Surrey from 95/4 to 109 all out to keep the CC open going into the last two games. Absolute scenes.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/scorecard/e-218972

Archie Vaughan with 11 wickets in the match, and all 20 Surrey wickets falling to spin. Bananas.

[thommo]

Why on earth are Surrey blocking out a chase of 221 in 80 overs? Play normally and they surely win that at a canter.

[Ben]

Pathetic from Surrey, deserved all they got.

The Taunton ground is receptive to runs even when the pitch spins like it did, so it’s insane that they didn’t even give it a go needing less than three an over. Cameron Steel batting 9, with a first class double ton.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They have 8 players away on international duty (Pope, Smith, Overton, Topley, Gus, Lawrence, Jacks, Sam C). That they even got anywhere in the game against Leach on a turning deck shows how utterly out in front of the rest of county cricket they are. That said, they need to get a front line spinner in the squad. Cam Steel is a club cricketer.

[Ben]

Travis Head absolutely obliterating us here.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He is on the point of unplayability in white ball. Not really sure how that's happened.

[niko_cee]

At some point we'll hopefully start playing against Australia before going two down in a series.

[Luke Emia]

Strailia obviously don’t like it up them on a wet and windy Friday night in London. Imagine what they’d be like if we had a stadium in Stoke?

In all seriousness though in a non-Ashes year why the fuck are we playing an ODI series against them in what is basically the winter? And I know the answer is money.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Crocked Cam Green for their season though, so it's been a worthwhile endeavour.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Race to the bottom this morning as a hopeless England side take on a dreadful Pakistan. We seem to have gone back to Chris Woakes taking the new ball abroad, which is certainly an option I suppose. Nice to have TMS early morning anyway.

[Ben]

I watched the first ten overs or so before leaving for work and Woakes is certainly toothless in these conditions, surprisingly.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Willing to eat my words on this but I don't get their obsession with Carse. Never rated him whatsoever and if I'm being ultra-critical it smacks of Stokes picking him because he knows him.

[Ben]

Bashir ain't it either.

[thommo]

This is tough sledding out there. I can't function properly playing 50 over cricket on a hot day in Wales, can't imagine what it feels like to be in the field today in Multan.

[Max Power]

Cannot wait to see how stupidly hard they go in response to 750-6dec

[thommo]

To be fair, batting like that served us well the last time we toured Pakistan.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Leach so important in these games, much more so than he is at home.

Trying to imagine what Babar Azam lbw b Woakes 30 looks like in these conditions. What a wastrel he is.

[Jimmy Floyd]

556 for Pakistan, which is 400 under par and scored at a pathetic 3.73 an over. England well on top.