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Thread: The Cricket Thread

  1. #9301
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    "Woeful England" in the first headline I saw. Thank God I was in bed. Thank you time zones.

    Lol at that first wicket.

  2. #9302
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Just watching the "highlights", and why did we choose to bat? That doesn't look like a batting pitch to me.

  3. #9303
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    Thank fuck I didn’t sit up till midnight to watch that.

  4. #9304
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    "Ashes Daily" on BT sport is abominable.

  5. #9305
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Watching Burns fall live was a truly special moment.

    I switched off in disgust when Stokes was out, so 147 isn't a bad effort from there. England well on top.

  6. #9306
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    What time did you (make the mistake of) staying up to?

  7. #9307
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    1am perhaps? The wickets fell thick and fast so my sleep wasn't too badly damaged.

  8. #9308
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Oh that could be worse, then.

    Still an hour more than I was prepared to commit to. Lockdown has made me a sleepy boy and I'm not spoiling that to watch us get ground into paste.

  9. #9309
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    "Ashes Daily" on BT sport is abominable.
    Aye their coverage reeks of doing it on the cheap. At least with Sky even if they are holed up in Isleworth they have their own commentary team. I mean Matt Smith was fronting the coverage last night what the fuck is that all about.

  10. #9310
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    Watching Burns fall live was a truly special moment.

    I switched off in disgust when Stokes was out, so 147 isn't a bad effort from there. England well on top.
    You never know the true state of the pitch until both teams have batted.... I actually heard that trotted out on SSN this morning.

  11. #9311
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I've turned on to hear the Aussie commentators suggesting that while Australia have batted well we've also bowled well and been a bit unlucky not to take some of those wickets earlier.

    This wouldn't be too dreadful a score to wake up to had we not totally surrendered it yesterday.

  12. #9312
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Sounds like Stokes was trying to set some sort of record for no balls as well.

  13. #9313
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Wood bowled very well.

  14. #9314
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    I've turned on to hear the Aussie commentators suggesting that while Australia have batted well we've also bowled well and been a bit unlucky not to take some of those wickets earlier.

    This wouldn't be too dreadful a score to wake up to had we not totally surrendered it yesterday.
    I fully expected to wake up with us 3 or 4 down for not many so whatever happens it’s not as bad as it could have been.

  15. #9315
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I guessed 311/4 before I opened my eyes this morning, so I guess I'll take it, but also, we've lost. Heavily.

    Absolutely classic result for an away spinner in Australia. You basically can't take them there, it's too macho a country to attempt guile and deception. An Australian batsman at any level all the way down to grade level sees a finger spinner, he sees a weak man with a small penis who needs to go out of the park. It's just how they think. Took me a while to suss.

    Leg spinners are kind of allowed because they're ATTACKING.
    Last edited by Jimmy Floyd; 09-12-2021 at 08:38 AM.

  16. #9316
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    We always let some useless middle order mook run riot against us down there. It's like clockwork. Haddin and Marsh immediately spring to mind.

    Wait, Leach went at 9s?

    How do you stick with him for that long whilst that is happening?

  17. #9317
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    Stokes didn't bowl after lunch really, so we had to use Leach, even though he was being tonked.

  18. #9318
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    Haddin’s streaky innings after we’ve managed to chisel them to 220-5 haunt my dreams.

    Watched the first 90 minutes and we did bowl quite well but after the no ball you just knew it was gonna end up being a day of pain. As ever in Australia you just have to bat big first innings and pre series anyone with a brain knew we simply don’t have the batting line up to do so. Their number 3 and 4 both average over 60 ffs.

  19. #9319
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    Also apparently Stokes overstepped every ball in his first over but it wasn’t called until the wicket - very poor.

  20. #9320
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    How does he even manage that though? Is that just a combination of being out of practice and, because the umpire hadn't told him, he didn't adjust his mark / run-up?

  21. #9321
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Bowlers don't practise bowling behind the line. They hate it, they all want to bowl off 19 yards and get their confidence high. I've tried to enforce it in our club sessions but you might as well be talking to a concrete wall, bowlers just don't and won't do it.

    He'll have probably had little bowling as well which won't have helped his rhythm.

  22. #9322
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    How does he even manage that though? Is that just a combination of being out of practice and, because the umpire hadn't told him, he didn't adjust his mark / run-up?
    Apparently the umpires don't look when the cameras are checking front foot no balls.

  23. #9323
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    Bowlers don't practise bowling behind the line. They hate it, they all want to bowl off 19 yards and get their confidence high. I've tried to enforce it in our club sessions but you might as well be talking to a concrete wall, bowlers just don't and won't do it.
    That is madness.

  24. #9324
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    When we end up getting whitewashed will this be the end of Silverwood? He makes Peter Moores look competent.

  25. #9325
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I'm not sure the coach has much effect either way, to be honest. It's not like there are 10 brilliant players left at home that he should have selected.

    I do think Root is a bad captain.

  26. #9326
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I wish that stepping down as the captain wasn't this shameful thing to do or that removing somebody wasn't seen as a total indictment of them. He's not right, fine, let him bat and give somebody else a try.

  27. #9327
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    So, what are the odds that this is all over in the morning?

  28. #9328
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    We'll probably let Australia's tail bat until tea. Then we'll get in and be 23-4 at stumps.

  29. #9329
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Why's the score the wrong way round on every highlight I see?
    I'm a twit

  30. #9330
    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    This thread is peak english cricket. Drowning in negativity. I love it.

  31. #9331
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    That last wicket just looked like he was tired of batting for so long, just gave Wood free range to york him.

  32. #9332
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hfswjyr View Post
    This thread is peak english cricket. Drowning in negativity. I love it.

  33. #9333
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Strewth Hayden is a bit of a fat fuck ATM

    Same as Botham oof.

  34. #9334
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    Tbf to Botham, he is an OAP with a mangled back.

  35. #9335
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    My mistake to Botham.

    Hayden is definitely a fat fuck from booze and food.

  36. #9336
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Hameed isn't up to it at all.

  37. #9337
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queenslander View Post
    My mistake to Botham.

    Hayden is definitely a fat fuck from booze and food.


    Mad how some people just do that. Though Hayden was always a unit.

  38. #9338
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Yeah massive bloke.


    My letter box is currently 54* according to my temp gun.

  39. #9339
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Nice. Half an hour for everything to go tits up now that I've seen the score.

  40. #9340
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queenslander View Post
    Yeah massive bloke.


    My letter box is currently 54* according to my temp gun.
    Queens weather gun is a tth staple.

  41. #9341
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Reasonably decent second innings so far... Shame we ballsed it first time out.

  42. #9342
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Well this doesn't seem to have been too dreadful but there's still zero chance we're winning.

    Quote Originally Posted by hfswjyr View Post
    This thread is peak english cricket. Drowning in negativity. I love it.
    Negativity is the one thing we're consistent at.

  43. #9343
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The Australians absolutely hate Hameed don't they. Pathological opposition to thin, cautious men.

  44. #9344
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    How worryingly high up the list of recent English openers in Australia would Hameed be if he keeps averaging mid-20s (i.e. Vince-ing it)? I've not looked but I'd be prepared to guess it'd be one of our better shows since Cook monstered it down there.

  45. #9345
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kikó View Post
    Queens weather gun is a tth staple.
    I must look like a loon when I check the footpath and the road.

  46. #9346
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    "Muuuuuum he's pointing it at the road again!"
    "Just stay inside until he goes back in, honey."

  47. #9347
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    "Muuuuuum he's pointing it at the road again!"
    "Just stay inside until he goes back in, honey."


    This has to have been said at least once.

  48. #9348
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Andre Russell is playing in the Big Bash tonight after only being in the country for 72 hours but the catch is he has to practice social distancing from his team, he cant touch anyone or be touched and he cant celebrate with the team. He was sitting on the boundary with an Afgahn player doing the same with only Marcus Stoinis talking to them from time to time.

    LOL
    Last edited by Queenslander; 10-12-2021 at 10:01 AM.

  49. #9349
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    If he's batting and the 'keeper stands up to the stumps does he have to socially distance himself out?

  50. #9350
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Good point I have no idea Im only going off what the commentators were telling us.

    Really absurd.
    Last edited by Queenslander; 10-12-2021 at 01:54 PM.

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