This is me. My manager keeps banging on about be going on courses and taking on responsibilities because she won't be around forever and someone will have to step up blah blah blah.Originally Posted by Ian
All well and good love, but I don't want your job. There's little I can imagine worse than being a manager and an extra 5 or 6 grand a year isn't going to make it appealing to me. I'd only spend it on shiny shit I don't need anyway.
I got asked by my manager last week why I didn't apply for a sort of intermediary manager role between his and my current one that came up.
I explained that actual management I can deal with but he seems to spend all his time on calls arguing with other people at our firm about the shite they're foisting on our team. Which I could imagine at least leading to some satisfying days when you managed to actually improve anything but given the shit we get just gets worse I'm not really seeing the incentive of progressing down that route here.
Yeah, I'm shying away from the team leader stuff now. I just don't have the drive for it or need. I'm pretty sure I'm being trained on some phone stuff for my days in the office so I'll get reintroduced to giving the Great British Public a slight inconvenience.
Last night we were given the task of communicating the company's new bank details to our respective customers. We were sent a PDF which contains three sets of details (sterling, euro and dollar accounts) so obviously only one applies to each customer depending on their location. I did a big bcc email to each category making sure to triple check the right emails had the right details in them.
The guy who sits next to me decided that this was all too much hassle, and said 'I'm just going to send them all the pdf'. I did my best Sgt Wilson impression (as I often do with him) and asked if he really thought this was wise, as it would give the customers ample opportunity to read the wrong details and pay into the wrong currency account. He said no, of course it won't. I said well, it probably will. One of the sales managers heard the conversation, came over and agreed with me in quite strong terms. The guy ignored us and sent them the pdf anyway.
This morning we've already had I think 4 calls from confused customers asking in which currency they are supposed to pay. My man is now in the managing director's office taking an absolutely massive hairdryer. Haven't felt this smug in ages, but that's lazy idiots for you.
You'll be running the place Jim, mark my words.
Giz a job Jim. WFH obviously.
All I have to do is somehow eliminate the 14 or so people above me in the structure and this could well come true.
The Grim Reaper should assist with about 3 of them.
If you're going to be a manager then you need to learn to delegate. Sounds like Spikey has his first task in his new role as the Smithers to your Burns
If Spikey can commit untraceable murders from home, then he's in.
Just stage it as an eviction gone wrong. Simples.
I'm sure nobody would question 14 of those happening in the space of a week.
There's not a CCTV camera in existence that could get a clear picture of my head. I'm in.
Monday morning joy following a Friday annual leave backlog and a heavy weekend. The peace of death can't come soon enough.
I’m off today and tomorrow.
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I'm a twit
I'm off today as well. Meant to be a TD day but it's been split up into after school sessions instead. Had to keep hold of my son until lunch time, but dropped him off now and I'm on my own until 6
14 working days remaining of this year
Had an incredibly sensible weekend, lots of sleep, no booze since a pint of john smiths on monday, and yet i've had the most cack-brained idiot day in ages
Kept making stupid mistakes and could barely concentrate by about 3pm. Might as well have just got pissed anyway.
I, on the other hand, had my heaviest weekend since Halloween and I still feel awful today. Might just give it up. I can't handle hangovers any more.
You should have slept it off outside the venue.
My hangovers don't seem to follow much rhyme or reason, though draught beer seems to fuck me up worse than anything else. I have had a lot of stinkers after 3 or 4 pints of beer recentlyish, but have had nights having 2 bottles of wine and a few spirit and mixers etc and have been absolutely fine the next day.
I was on a stag down in Glasgow and drank more on Friday than he have in the last 2 years combined. Saturday at Queens Park vs. Kilmarnock hospitality was not fun.
On the plus side:
1. There is zero to none care for covid amongst the teen and twenties population in Glasgow. Also a very high proportion of attractive birds in the places I frequented.
2. I’m off this week, so have spent most of today festering.
3. Took my first ever lateral flow test and confirmed negative.
Think I’ll basically be in coast mode when I go back in next week.
Am off work but am receiving delicious updates from the weekly whole company zoom from my mate.
Head of IT announced the new lad starting in the entry level position, and some woman muttered "another bloke" very audibly. The v senior department head running the meeting tried to play it off as "background noise", but the it guy wasn't having it and said "no, I heard what was said, and no women ever apply for jobs like this."
People reckon the person who said it was this super senior woman on about 70k, so very easy for her to moan from her privileged position. Like, yeah, there should be more women in IT and other traditional male jobs probably, but it's not really fair to expect the IT guy to instigate societal change by employing a hypothetical woman that hasn't even applied. I imagine she's contributed roughly fuck all to getting more women in IT jobs, but probably once shared something on LinkedIn and commented "wow really inspiring guys!" which is basically the same as doing something right?
Ok Gammon. Bet you wouldn't have employed Sol Campbell or Paul Ince for the position either.
Can you work in IT if all you know is social media stories? No? Then shut up, women.
I'm a twit
Does she have 'she/her' in her signature? If not, pile in.
My company is amazing in that literally every job is done by the expected gender. The board and directors are all male. The sales department is all male. The single marketing person is a woman. All the technical team are male (except the secretary), and all logistical/admin jobs are done by women. All expect one - the new chief engineer, who is a 23 year old blonde woman who every man in the company secretly fancies. Well, all but me.
Of course they all fancy her, she's about a quarter of most of your firm's age and they probably all still think seeing a bit of ankle is pretty racy.
You've missed a perfectly good chance to have a phwoar there. This is exactly what Quincy was talking about.
Sorry, good point, what I meant was DOES SHE HAVE BIG TITS, JIMMY?
Why should it be a bird anyway? Best candidate.
Recieved this email today:
What’s £85 plus VAT (I don’t know what VAT rate is anymore)?
Kindest Regards,
I replied saying VAT is 20% so it's £102, to which she replied:
To repeat a famous quote from my mate after our Mike jumped into a swimming pool and splashed water on his new sunglasses, THINK BEFORE YOU DO THINGS!Sorry to bother you and thanks I did recall the message as I’ve just googled it.
You are probably really busy having just returned from leave.
Also someone who emails me regularly has this on every email, in massive blue writing before her name:
I'm not cut out for interraction.If I don’t send a reply saying thank you or if you have cc’d me into an email for information and I don’t respond, it doesn’t mean I am not grateful for your email, I am trying to be efficient and reduce our inboxes.
I'm a twit
He's getting the bullet today. I've only ever had to sack someone once, and it was awful, mostly because the guy was just devestated. I'm expecting a similar reaction from this guy today.
In fairness he was given feedback and didn’t buck up so he can’t have any complaints. A lot of places would just do you in the background with no warning you were underperforming.
Godspeed. Dropping your second body must be easier than the first.
Just in time for Christmas.
If I was going to be sacked, I reckon now would be about the best time, assuming I had the financial means to get through 4-6 weeks or so. No better time for a new life than January.
Homeless by Boxing Day.
No better day to be living in one.
What kid hasn't dreamed of living in a box castle in the park?
I'm paying him his December salary still, I couldn't bring myself to leave him jobless and penniless over Christmas.
A true man of the people.
Fuck that, that’s no life lesson.
Some firm in whatever country it was at the time my dad worked for years ago decided the day to tell all their expat workers they were binning off their contracts was Christmas Eve.
By fax.
That really injected the Christmas spirit into the household.
Oooff. That's how you do it SVN.
I bet he regretted unwrapping his fax machine a day early.
I'm a twit
I once had a month's paid gardening leave over the summer when the World Cup was on. Genuine high point that
Fucking hell, he just mentioned that he's proposing to his girlfriend at Christmas.
Is that before he comes into the abbatoir, or during?
Lordy.
It hasn't happened yet. The plan is to call him into the meeting room just as we finish. Means he doesn't have to pack up his shit in front of everyone.
So tomorrow morning everyone gets the email 'Please note that Mr Jacob Marley is no longer employed by SvN Enterprises' and he is never seen again?
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