I'm so shit at football I'm hyper aware of the all the gear no idea risk, but i figured turning up in skinny jeans and a striped cotton t shirt might be a step too far.
I'm so shit at football I'm hyper aware of the all the gear no idea risk, but i figured turning up in skinny jeans and a striped cotton t shirt might be a step too far.
thank youOriginally Posted by bam
who cares what he was buying.
Full kit wanker.
You would normally.Who cares what he was buying.
To briefly change the subject from my 5 a side gear, I've already been reminded of how frustrating internet dating can be
will bore you all with the details later, but flakiness and unpredictability is very irritating when you're properly into someone
Aw noTo briefly change the subject from my 5 a side gear, I've already been reminded of how frustrating internet dating can be
will bore you all with the details later, but flakiness and unpredictability is very irritating when you're properly into someone
No I would not, I've no interest in what people buy from Sports Direct. Stop making things up.
You do realise that you've all been going on about it for over 24hrs?
I have?No I would not, I've no interest in what people buy from Sports Direct. Stop making things up.
You do realise that you've all been going on about it for over 24hrs?
If we applied the "who really cares" initiative to everything on this website there would never be any new posts.
How’s your office crush going?
I'm a twit
Who really cares?
Who really cares?
Bru really, really cares.
I care.
Why?
I care.
You're all my friends.
I'm a twit
I care about Kiko's carbon footprint.
She has vanished, presumably to go work at another office.
I overheard one of the managers here telling her to "well keep and touch and tell Cheryl we say hello!" and ever since, nada.
Give me £500. I need to buy a few PS4 Pro's and ship them off to Jamaica.
You sound like a great friend Sincere.
Friendship ended with Norfolk tinder girl #1
Now Norfolk tinder girl #2 is my best friend
(31) Days of Norwich.
He'll always have her stench on his fingers.
Or the taste of her arse.
That escalated and deescalated quickly. Sorry iggy.
After 6 years of being single I feel like I'm getting close to #offical relationship status. Wowzers.
Aren't you all supposed to be drowning in clunge with the advent of Tinder? Never really got to grips with that as I met the wife on PoF pretty quickly after leaving a psycho long term gf and ditching a nice girl who could deepthroat for England but had too much associated baggage. My mate is a former shut in who is shagging like a trooper on Tinder in Leeds now though.
Not exactly an endless supply of fanny with standards that don't match my face, but I've had a few tinder shags. Tbf I wasnt looking for anything serious but, like, she's really cool yeah.
I think there's also probably a high correlation between deep throating ability and baggage, sadly.
Last edited by igor_balis; 22-11-2019 at 11:56 AM. Reason: Nice freudian autocorrect there
o hai gice
Lads. The Gremlin is very good at doing what she does. Im lying next to her with scratches on my face after an unprotected session. Ive been seduced. Her species has a different type of energy.
Disclaimer: I know it's also hard to give advice given you have no context, and as such will give advice based on your own experiences. In hindsight, this is probably the worst place I could have asked this.
Just got this message lads after I dropped her off. Dunno if I was going overboard with affection and compliments? Maybe I was, don't really have anything to compare with as my previous one was just insults lololol. Maybe hers was too? I did think 'smothered' was a bit harsh though. We only see each other like once or twice a week and we've only been seeing each other for 6 weeks.
Sorry I sometimes get overwhelmed with so much affection, compliments etc, it's not your fault but I just feel a wee bit smothered sometimes. I know you mean well and I appreciate all your gestures. ❤ xxxxxxx ps dont apologise I just want to be honest. I've been on my own for a while. And please feel free to tell me fuck off as I sound so ungrateful ��
My initial standard reaction was 'go fuck yourself' but on reflection that's a pointless, damaging reaction to a genuine concern someone has been honest enough to raise. I did also initially read it as a break up text but again that might be me over-reacting. I just gave a generic reply back:
I completely understand, I did pick up on it & that's my bad for going overboard again! Always be honest! No way you're not ungrateful, not at all! There's nothing to be grateful for! I appreciate your honesty big time . ��
Hope you're ok in the meantime xxx
Edited for GDPR. That'll buy me some time to think. Do I really want to be having to navigate what appears to be significant emotional problems so soon after a horrible marriage? Do I have significant problems that I need to address now or forever have a viscous cycle? Do I walk away from what seemed to me a pretty amazing girl and beginnings of a really positive relationship? How do I address that concern, a concern I wasn't aware of (I lied with my 'picked up on it' comment). Appreciate the usual 'fag, bury under patio, marry her' feedback, as well as any constructive that anyone has.
Last edited by Magic; 25-11-2019 at 02:29 PM.
Play it cool.
Was my reply playing it cool? I deleted a big long spiel about myself being shit at everything.
edit: She replied saying she was in a shite relationship (I knew that anyway) and she had a freakout because she doesn't know how to handle it, sorry for dampener, sometimes just need space thanks for understanding etc etc etc.
Thing is what do I do now? Purposely not pass compliments? Don't make her a cuppa? Not suggest doing things because of 'space'? Or just forget it happened and carry on 'as normal'. But I don't want to do that if it's going to smother her. Damn my horrific childhood and understanding of relationships.
How do I reply?
Last edited by Magic; 25-11-2019 at 02:43 PM.
Once again Magic it's very simple, you need to get the fuck outta your own head again.
"There's nothing to be grateful for" brooooo shuuut uuuup. Stop trying to bring yourself down because you were nice to a girl and treated her with respect. She does have plenty to be grateful for. Knowing that you were a perfect gentleman and did your best to make her feel good about herself she quite very likely isn't used to that sort of affection and attention from someone.
What it sounds like to me is that she's realized she's met a terrific fella who actually was raised with sense and manners and it's scared her. She realizes there's nowhere to go but up but given she said she's been alone for awhile she probably suffers from the same type of self-esteem issues that you're currently expressing in this very thread.
"What is happening? Surely this is a mistake. Something is going to go wrong." etc. etc.
She feels herself becoming genuinely invested and vulnerable and while it's an exciting feeling it's a new feeling or, one she hasn't felt in awhile.
She'll want to take some time to sort those emotions out and see if she, herself, is ready for that next level of commitment. That's a perfectly natural and fine response especially for someone who has built so many levels of walls to keep herself from getting hurt.
Personally? As hard as it may be I would at give it a day or two to see if she initiates and small talk or anything in the meantime and then go from there but do not initiate. Give her the space she needs to figure it out. If a few days go by, I don't think there'd be anything wrong with reaching out and saying something kinda corny to the effect of
or you know something like that. Which doesn't mean you sit around waiting forever but girls love romantic bullshit so maybe that would do the trick for you."Hey (xxxxx), I hope everything's going well on your end. I just want to say I really did enjoy our time together and hope that it's only space you need to sort out your feelings for me because I certainly still have very real feelings for you. I know these different emotions can be overwhelming, especially since we've both gone on such winding roads before meeting each other, but I just want you to know how much I do care about you and want to support you in that regardless. Hope to speak soon but if it's only time that you need I'll wait as long as it takes xx."
Regardless, you're a top lad and there'll be others if not her.
Remember, this actually has nothing to do with you because you're only being a good person and a good man who is showing her respect and genuine affection.
Don't start second guessing yourself because she's not used to being so charmed by a gentleman.
buuut that's just like my opinion, man.
My God. I've taken your advice.
Just throw the odd backhander into your normal approach.
Negs worked on all the 'sloots' that Mert was bagging...
Thanks Bruh. Can hold my head high if this is it done. Great news is my Bumble subscription is premium until December.
I’d say she wants to leg it. They normally roll out all this crap instead of just saying because it makes them feel better about themselves.
That said, no harm in giving the Bruh method a go first and see.
Your response was pretty needy tbh. Each exclamation mark was unnecessary. If somebody is overwhelmed, it's best not to shout at them.
Are you afraid of being single or are you genuinely mad for her? Did you ever come to terms with being single and truly comfortable in yourself? Might be too much too soon, maybe you're out of practice, or maybe she's not used to somebody being nice.
Last edited by Offshore Toon; 25-11-2019 at 06:45 PM.
I get that feeling too, despite everything appearing to the contrary. Like I said that message was completely out of the blue after a really nice weekend so...but I can only act with decorum and if I take everything as a personal sleight I'm at fucking square one again. So thanks all.
She sounds like damaged goods. Run a mile.
No, I'm afraid of not picking up what some might deem as obvious signs or red flags or whatever. I'm not mad at her at all, I just want to be myself without having to wind anything in or put a mask on. It's confusing for me because one minute she'll be saying adoring things the next I'm being told I'm smothering. Mixed messages, but I get letting yourself be open and genuine might be hard if you've been torn down before.
My initial reaction was definitely in my head, though.
Anyway she hasn't text me back so I'm expecting a "can you drop off my coat" message tomorrow evening, especially if she doesn't message tonight.
Hmm I'd be hesitant moving forward then, but no harm in carrying things on to find out for sure. Might as well get back on Bumble too.
Maybe I'm the damaged goods. Someone raises a concern and my first thought is a personal attack? I've failed the first hurdle?
I didn't consider it Offy as I was so sure I was ready, but maybe I'm not, and more worryingly maybe I just don't know how to maintain a meaningful relationship without going too far in any direction.
She's challenged your behaviour in a way that's always going to force some deep consideration. Whether it's fair is really difficult to judge without a transcript of your dates, though.
You need to be comfortable acting however you see fit, but you also need to be sure that your behaviour is good for all involved. If you want a loving relationship and you're comfortable acting the way you have, then I'd say you should seek a relationship where that's possible.
I thought I did have that to some extent...up until now. That's why I can't really understand or reflect appropriately. Or was I just lying to myself? She did tell she felt uncomfortable with pace when I asked her to come out for a couple of drinks with my friends. That was after a month. But I didn't read that as a negative on my part. My sister knows context so I'll run calling it off by her tonight so hopefully I can maintain some semblance of control of my own future.
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
