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Thread: Thread about nothing.

  1. #1
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    Thread about nothing.

    Idk just random thoughts.

    ---

    "There are currently 583 users online. 56 members and 527 guests"

    Holy shit that seems excessive, obviously not real humans but how does 527 even appear lol

  2. #2
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Bots and Harold.

  3. #3
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    But what would the purpose of 527 bots be that's what I'm trying to understand if that makes any sense.

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    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I'm more surprised there's 56 members.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Nearly everyone who eats chocolate digestives eats them upside down.

  6. #6
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    At first I thought you meant like ex-lax and I was extraordinarily confused.

    Having googled, is the chocolate side meant to be the bottom? Sounds suspiciously RACIST to me! :P

  7. #7
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    It makes sense. You're less likely to get crumbs everywhere if you hold it properly. Plus, why would the 'right' way to hold it change just because you added chocolate to one side?

  8. #8
    I used to be funny.
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    It's a chocolate topping, not a chocolate bottoming.

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    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    It's a chocolate topping, not a chocolate bottoming.
    You sir could not be more wrong.

  10. #10
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    Recently I've been really into some weirdo behavior.

    Ever take a paperclip and stretch out the one of the ends and then clean your ear with it?

    Oh fuck it feels so good, guys.

  11. #11
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Enjoy your perforated eardrums

  12. #12
    Fuck like you cook.
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    It's still no Stefan Postma.

  13. #13
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    Recently I've been really into some weirdo behavior.

    Ever take a paperclip and stretch out the one of the ends and then clean your ear with it?

    Oh fuck it feels so good, guys.
    Have you recently started taking meth?

  14. #14
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    Dude try it. If that's how sex feels for women but just in their crotch I mean holy shit we missed the boat fellas.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    See how far in you can get it.

  16. #16
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    Why the fuck do ya'll get up every single day?

    Like what keeps you doing this shit day after day after day?

    I have generally no will to live I just keep floating along and I honestly can't figure it out.

    Is it like.... you've got families and things like that? Would you still do this shit if you weren't attached to other people who depend on you for their emotional and potentially financial wellbeing?

    Or is there like a genuine "Ah fuck ya let's do this life thing" regardless of your attachments?

  17. #17
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Magic's divorce updates.

  18. #18
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    That's actually a good shout.

  19. #19
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    I wanna see what happens.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Yeah, you might as well see it out. You won't get to the end of your life and regret not killing yourself. If your environment isn't particularly good, you have the power to change it. It might take a long time, possibly years, but you'll reap dividends in the future. Just decide what will make you happy then go out and get it. Thinking about life in terms of experiences, both good and bad, instead of happiness will actually make you happier. There's also humour to be found in everything, but I'm not sure that's worth explaining to a yank.

  21. #21
    I used to be funny.
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    Because it's easy and there's a lot of scope to it. You can fall way short of your childhood ambitions and still come out feeling you've done alright. As for suicide, you die at the end by default. There's no reason to put the effort in.

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    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    What's the alternative? Sounds boring(er).

  23. #23
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Life is great, if you work hard you get to learn new things every day, meet new people, have good times with friends, all the classics. There’s so much that wakes me up in the morning but it’s all dependent on me not being a lazy slob. If you were to work on that, the quality of your life would shoot up dramatically, i think

  24. #24
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    The Tesco man looking after the self service checkouts has just sidled up to me to tell me that Morrisons are going to start charging thirty pence for their plastic bags. He stood about a foot away from me while I scanned my items and whispered it at me like he was conducting some proper corporate espionage.

  25. #25
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    On my last trip to the UK I found out it's illegal/now allowed to just buy one can of beer in Tesco? You have to buy the 4-pack. This is mental to me, I presume they're angling it as a health thing so people don't just casually buy a beer instead of a soft drink but surely it just encourages someone to drink 4 cans instead of the 1 or 2 they planned on?

  26. #26
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Rip Tesco man.

  27. #27
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    On my last trip to the UK I found out it's illegal/now allowed to just buy one can of beer in Tesco? You have to buy the 4-pack. This is mental to me, I presume they're angling it as a health thing so people don't just casually buy a beer instead of a soft drink but surely it just encourages someone to drink 4 cans instead of the 1 or 2 they planned on?
    Do you mean just peeling one off/out of a 4-pack?

    There's really no place for that sort of hobo behaviour.

  28. #28
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by niko_cee View Post
    Do you mean just peeling one off/out of a 4-pack?

    There's really no place for that sort of hobo behaviour.
    Please let it be this.

  29. #29
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Yes it was. That's the done thing over here. The bar-code on the item is for 1x and then you have a bar-code for the combi-pack.

    The only singles they were selling were small cans of IPA with some shit pun for a name and the rest were combi-packs.

  30. #30
    I used to be funny.
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    Guide dogs will lead their owners through dog shit. That is all.

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    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Presumably it’s similar to the tube of Coke I’m drinking at the moment, there’s no barcode on it as the outer pack has one. Plus it says not to be sold separately on it. Are you sure the inner can had a code on it?

  32. #32
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    On my last trip to the UK I found out it's illegal/now allowed to just buy one can of beer in Tesco? You have to buy the 4-pack. This is mental to me, I presume they're angling it as a health thing so people don't just casually buy a beer instead of a soft drink but surely it just encourages someone to drink 4 cans instead of the 1 or 2 they planned on?
    'I ripped open the andrex m8. Only needed 4 sheets. How much?'

  33. #33
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I don't think I've ever felt this Brexit. They should have campaigned on this. There'd be no debate.

    Fuck it, we could reunite Ireland and have it included in the UK with this shit going on over there. @Giggles, you can either have the Queen or people breaking up 4 packs willy nilly, what's it to be?
    Last edited by Spikey M; 26-08-2019 at 08:14 PM.

  34. #34
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    Presumably it’s similar to the tube of Coke I’m drinking at the moment, there’s no barcode on it as the outer pack has one. Plus it says not to be sold separately on it. Are you sure the inner can had a code on it?
    No I'm saying Switzerland has that system. But yes, if you buy a 4-pack of Stella you can scan 1 can and it'll price it as 4.

    I just went to the off-license down the road.

    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    'I ripped open the andrex m8. Only needed 4 sheets. How much?'
    They literally have a shelf that sells damaged goods for cheaper which you'd never get away with here. It's just an odd system.

  35. #35
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Most of those shelfs are only there because there's Italians taking pocket fulls of Penne to the till.

  36. #36
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    I don't think I've ever felt this Brexit. They should have campaigned on this. There'd be no debate.

    Fuck it, we could reunite Ireland and have it included in the UK with this shit going on over there. @Giggles, you can either have the Queen or people breaking up 4 packs willy nilly, what's it to be?
    I’ll let phonics buy it by the mouthful.

  37. #37
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Stick it up your backstop then lad.

  38. #38
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by John View Post
    The Tesco man looking after the self-service checkouts has just sidled up to me to tell me that Morrisons are going to start charging thirty pence for their plastic bags. He stood about a foot away from me while I scanned my items and whispered it at me like he was conducting some proper corporate espionage.
    I don't use the self-checkout anymore. I like to think that me not using it, is saving someone's jobs down the line somehow. Eventually, they will look to cut everyone off and replace them with the machine.

    Maybe im just being an idiot and thinking too much.

  39. #39
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SincereTheRebel View Post
    I don't use the self-checkout anymore. I like to think that me not using it, is saving someone's jobs down the line somehow. Eventually, they will look to cut everyone off and replace them with the machine.

    Maybe im just being an idiot and thinking too much.
    What about the lad that fixes the self service machine, the one that bothered finishing school?

  40. #40
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    Stick it up your backstop then lad.
    You lost me at joining up with the nordies.

  41. #41
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    You lost me at joining up with the nordies.
    The one flaw in an otherwise perfect plan.

  42. #42
    I used to be funny.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    What about the lad that fixes the self service machine, the one that bothered finishing school?
    Or the people having to go to the back to check stock. It was a shitshow when I last went to Sainsburys for anything other than groceries. "Go to checkout 20 for those." <points at empty checkout> 10 minute wait for an actual person to show up and then another 15 to run to back for the thing I was after.

    Reinstate the electronics / clothes desk, you shitheads.

  43. #43
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SincereTheRebel View Post
    I don't use the self-checkout anymore. I like to think that me not using it, is saving someone's jobs down the line somehow. Eventually, they will look to cut everyone off and replace them with the machine.

    Maybe im just being an idiot and thinking too much.
    I do the same unless it’s a huge line. A bit more face to face interaction in the day never hurts.

  44. #44
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    Ya but you live in Utah. I imagine people are pleasant.

  45. #45
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    All face to face interaction in the US is over-forced fake anyway.

  46. #46
    Senior Member Gray Fox's Avatar
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    Avoiding face-to-face interaction at all costs should be a sport over here.

  47. #47
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    So you guys aren't even like remotely pleasant with other humans?

    I fuckin despise humans but strive on being pleasant and minding my own business.

  48. #48
    Senior Member Gray Fox's Avatar
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    If you go to London and say hi to a person, they'll run in fear.

  49. #49
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Or mug you.

  50. #50
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    “How are you?”
    ”Grand, yourself?”
    ”Not too bad.”

    End of conversation.

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