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Thread: The All New, All Shit, Relationship Thread

  1. #5001
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Of course, she wont be done with him for another year before needing to find a new victim. /JusticeforMagic.

  2. #5002
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    I just downloaded Tinder, set it all up and my first card or whatever it is was a 22 year old model porn star. Or she looked like one. Uninstalled straight away.
    There's far more respectable ones out there so you've no need to use that shit show. You don't seem to be ready for that stage regardless though, there's no rush.

  3. #5003
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Remember when people on here were arsing about with Plenty of Fish for that thread and nickfootie found his own sister?

  4. #5004
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Wasn't DS luring some weirdos too, and nickfootie had to implore him not to target his sister?

  5. #5005
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    As I recall the thread was on the wind-up with fake accounts and as they were enjoying all the bants Nick found his sister on there.

    I think somebody said they'd found her but I dunno if they actually had or if he just had the fear enough to entertain the notion.

  6. #5006
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I'm really addicted to bumble.

    Lol at the shit chat up lines. You can tell who is experienced.

  7. #5007
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    No luck with matching really so I got fed up of being notified I'd BEEN LIKED without knowing anymore...so I signed up to premium at £12 a month, for 6 months.

    And it was all horrific fat ugly birds.



    I've been conned, lads.

  8. #5008
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    No luck with matching really so I got fed up of being notified I'd BEEN LIKED without knowing anymore...so I signed up to premium at £12 a month, for 6 months.

    And it was all horrific fat ugly birds.



    I've been conned, lads.
    That's how they get you.

    Just saw someone on tinder whose bio had in it "Expecting my first child. Sadly things didn't work out so doing it alone."

    Fucking hell.

  9. #5009
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I've avoided Tinder thus far but might go back. Desperately need convincing I'm not an ugly troll now.

  10. #5010
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    £12 a month to approach women?
    I'm a twit

  11. #5011
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Well, he met his last one at school and he'd go on a register if he tried that now.

  12. #5012
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    £12 a month to approach women?
    Sounds like a great deal.

  13. #5013
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    £12 a month to approach women?
    Pretty much. I think it's good. Can't imagine doing it IRL.

  14. #5014
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Im starting to get shook now. Im going drop-in clinic this afternoon.

  15. #5015
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    No point in signing up for the 6 month subscription for you then.

  16. #5016
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    He's posting in the wrong thread now. Definitely syphilitic.

  17. #5017
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    Pretty much. I think it's good. Can't imagine doing it IRL.
    Why not?
    I'm a twit

  18. #5018
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Expand your social circle to silly levels. Attend events, join clubs, catch up with old friends. You never know what hidden gems lie in the potential aquaitances.

  19. #5019
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Cut the BS and go snorkeling with Sincere.

  20. #5020
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    Why not?
    Because its awkward.

  21. #5021
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    "Just be more confident!" in 3.... 2.....

  22. #5022
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Play it cool.

  23. #5023
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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  24. #5024
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    You're probably nowhere near ready the stage for anyone else at all, unless you're just looking for a ride. In which case Tinder is exactly the spot.

  25. #5025
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I need experience. Not going to get that in a basement.

    How quickly can you suggest meeting? This texting stuff is doing my head in.

  26. #5026
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    As soon as possible imo, there's nothing worse than trying to maneuver romantically over text.

    Of course, I say that as someone who's never been on a Tinder date or anything, Okay Amigo notwithstanding.

  27. #5027
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Tell her to meet you in a Tesco parking lot when the moon has reached its zenith

  28. #5028
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    If you're just out for banging some sloooooots, then crack on, but a new relationship would be a disaster right now.

  29. #5029
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Yeah fuck that, just something casual but more than a one night stand. Defo not a relationship.

  30. #5030
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    Yeah fuck that, just something casual but more than a one night stand. Defo not a relationship.
    Thats a slippery ass slope. I suggest committing to one night stands for a while. Or at the very least preserve utmost emotional distance from anyone you're seeing. Sounds whack but true.

  31. #5031
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Get a sugar baby.

  32. #5032
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Get an atomic kitten.

  33. #5033
    I used to be funny.
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    Kerry Katona might still be in Iceland.

  34. #5034
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mugbull View Post
    Thats a slippery ass slope. I suggest committing to one night stands for a while. Or at the very least preserve utmost emotional distance from anyone you're seeing. Sounds whack but true.
    How is that slippier than quick wins?

  35. #5035
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    How is that slippier than quick wins?
    “Something casual but not a one night stand” quickly turns into “i’ve been seeing this girl for a month and i’m so emotionally vulnerable that i’ve fallen deeply in love already” and then “she’s stopped texting me”

  36. #5036
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Take a few pages out of Igors book and Facebook live the suicide when it all goes wrong.

  37. #5037
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mugbull View Post
    “Something casual but not a one night stand” quickly turns into “i’ve been seeing this girl for a month and i’m so emotionally vulnerable that i’ve fallen deeply in love already” and then “she’s stopped texting me”
    It really doesn't.

  38. #5038
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    For you, it will

  39. #5039
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mugbull View Post
    For you, it will
    Maybe 7 months ago. Not now.

  40. #5040
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    FYI the bitch asked me for money today to cover a summer club. I told her to do one on the basis I pay maintenance already and more, plus I can't see her anywhere near as much I'd like.

  41. #5041
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Pay on the basis you take her?

  42. #5042
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manc View Post
    Take a few pages out of Igors book and Facebook live the suicide when it all goes wrong.
    cunt

  43. #5043
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manc View Post
    Pay on the basis you take her?
    He's already paid.

  44. #5044
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I have... A DATE.

  45. #5045
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Don't end up blocking her or anything stupid like that.

  46. #5046
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    What you mean?

  47. #5047
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Sowing a seed.

  48. #5048
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Do it for the thread.

    Igor has been bullied into silence by Shinners and Waff is lodged firmly under thumb, so we need this shit.

  49. #5049
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Snogged a sexy girl in a nightclub last night lads waaaay

  50. #5050
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Had some fucking wicked donner meat and chips afterwards too. Here I am taking in the ambiance of Norwich kebab and pizza :

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