Wow.Originally Posted by Magic
Wow.
Unfortunately that is verbatim.
Quite frankly you showed some saintly levels of restraint not setting her on fire after reading that.
That sounds pretty rough, not that there's a nice way to find out. Still, doesn't sound like she was trying very hard to save the relationship so good riddance. Try and keep it amicable is my only advice, everything else will be 1000% easier if you both be (semi)rational about it.
And I'm not telling people the real reason why, just saying we decided it was best for all.
Absolutely. Life is too short.
Hope everything works out alright for you, Magic. I echo everyone's sentiments about you being better off.
I don't know anything about divorce law in Scotland but hopefully it can be an amicable enough divorce for you.
Fucking hell that's rough.
That's impressive magnanimity on your part. It must be tough but well done, it's the best thing to do.
Ordinarily I'd be all for destroying her but yeah, she's your childs mother still so fair play taking the higher road with the info.
Horrible situation but I am sure it will work out for the best in the long run.
Ya the only reason to be cool with this bitch is so she doesn't try to poison your daughter against you while you're not around.
I fucking hate this person and I don't even know either of you.
This sucks Magic but, it was always gonna happen sooner or later I guess. May as well plow through the shite now and come out better for it in the end.
Hopefully you'll end up playing this nicely (the way it seems you do), living the single life for a while (at which point she'll attempt to 'get you back' - mark my words), and then eventually meet someone who actually makes you happy most of the time
Obvious to say but we're here for you Magic, no matter how shitty it gets \o
Let's not forget I'm a fucking bastard as well.
I'm going to try and as I said maintain my dignity and self respect throughout and rebuild myself that way.
I'm a total mess now though lads, feel like I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown.
Apart from us, who are obviously here as your main men, do you have any kind of other support-net you can turn to to go out and get pissed and have a rant with?
Should do a band reunion.
How old is the kid?
That's true, lets not.
He's not called tragic custard for nothing.
This really is such solid advice.
We had a heart to heart last night. I accepted everything, no hard feelings. I get why she was 'looking for a buzz' no idea if she'd have followed through with it but things really sucked. Also our kid knows now too but not sure if it's sinking in. Tried to explain we're on the same team now, and there will be no more upsetting shouting or arguing.
I am in total disarray. I cry every time I set foot in 'my' house. It's like the STOP button has been pressed instantly, I can't sleep in my bed, I can't hear my daughter snoring, I can't cozy up to my wife, or watch stupid programmes with her. Devastating.
I might vent on here quite a lot so I apologise for that in advance. I need (NEED) to get my shit together with work but I'm really worried I won't be able to. I just cannot be arsed and feel like telling everyone to just fuck off.
EDIT: What is really strange is I can't tell now if the Prozac is working or not, I want to come off them but it might not be the best idea. Fuck sake.
Probably worth seeing a doctor before making any changes to your medicine mate. Hope it all works out for you.
I don't think anyone would blame you if you took some time off work mate, given the situation. I'm sure that would be relatively easy to sort out with a doctor. But, saying that, I imagine sitting around the house all day with little else to occupy your mind probably isn't a particularly appealing thought either at the minute.
Let’s get a flat together, MJ.
It would be like Andy Carroll moving in with Kevin Noland but there's just two Andy Carrolls.
Don't you fucking dare go off your medication right now. If anything, you might benefit from upping your dosage during this spell.
As for work, you're allowed to request time off in the event of personal emergency. This qualifies.
If they don't give you the respect you deserve for this, then definitely get a new job.
Err, yeah, I don't think we should be coming off or increasing medication without speaking to a Dr first.
Well, yes.
If there was ever a time to dabble surely it's these carefree early separation days.
Get the gear in with Waffles.
Single dads are cool these days magic. Assuming you've still got some hair and a bit of talent on an instrument you'll be fine.
Embrace it and enjoy when you're around your kid. Great opportunity to go out and do shit when you have her, rather than just amble about the house in your pants.
Chin up and keep on rolling. She sounds shit anyway.
Ah fuck, if that's the score then I'd be really fucked if me and my lady split.
Why is this? I know you say you’re a bastard but surely you’ve not been caught doing anything as bad as texting someone saying you’d desperately like an affair? If it was the other way around, would she not throw you under the bus so all your joint-friends would side with her?
I'm a twit
Because he needs to maintain a civil relationship with her, for the good of the child. It's not about scoring points or doing what she would do.
Listen it isn't like this was a glorious, loving relationship. We both neglected each other terribly and that was the last straw. Unfortunately I was ok to remain status quo until my hospital appointment (today, funnily enough) where I was hoping to get an ADHD diagnosis and re-start my life.
I didn't want to go private as I thought what harm could it be waiting another 5 months. Well, there you go.
Absolutely this. No time for scoring points when there's a kid in the mixer.
If it gets nasty the kid suffers the most.
Magic is playing it right thus far.
It won't get nasty.
I really can't comprehend my life at the moment. One minute totally safe and secure, now I'm living in my dad's basement, can't eat, heavily depressed, fucking my work up, can't see my daughter because every time I do I fall apart. Fuck sake.
I don't want to put the boot in, but it hasn't been safe and secure in years based on your posts here.
I know, I was probably sleepwaking and/or deluded. However, it was all I knew. Now I have nothing.
You've got me.
At least now you can hopefully focus on actually having a happy life.
Well I pretty much got my ADHD diag, going back tomorrow to start meds.
Having had an almost 2hr therapy session the guy thought there might be other issues waiting to rear their head when I told him my life from childhood to now (lol).
I can't say I feel suicidal, but it can't be far off it. I have never, ever felt as low as I do now.
Touche.
Kickboxer 6: Gubbed.
Have you made any steps towards formalising your arrangement Magic? How are you getting on?
Hope it all works out for you, Magic.
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