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Thread: The little things in life that fuck you off

  1. #6051
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mazuuurk View Post
    Lew I love how you never ever miss any kind of opportunity to bring War History onto the stage.

    Still, it's fascinating, so do tell? Genuinely interested in what makes a military genius (in your view I suppose) and why they stopped being around in the 20th century...?
    Basically, there was no room for it. In the Second World War for example, between the size (and nature) of the armies, the power (and abundance) of the weaponry, and the political accountability, there was very little scope for individuals and/or small groups to come up with and implement extraordinary wheezes as previous battlefield commanders had. There were isolated and smaller scale examples of it, most notably on both sides in North Africa and the Mediterranean, where half the time they didn't have enough equipment and were given a relatively free hand to make the best of it, but nothing comparable in terms of individual input to something like Frederick the Great taking on the rest of Europe or Gustavus Adolphus tearing through Germany. As far as the twentieth century goes your best bets for military genius would be people fighting insurgent campaigns, and doing so with massive scope for personal command, like Christiaan de Wet and Paul von Lettow-Vorbeck.

  2. #6052
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    You forgot Gerry Adams and Martin McGuinness.

  3. #6053
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    The product description of this toaster:



    https://www.johnlewis.com/dualit-new...aster/p2843289

  4. #6054
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    How is it doing an odd number of slices an hour with two slots?

    Scroll right to the bottom of that and you can download their '2017/2018 Modern Slavery statement.' That seems like something worth reading.

  5. #6055
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It's about as interesting as you'd imagine.

  6. #6056
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    I would like to go to Japan, but having to take cases full of normal food seems like a bit of a ballache.
    The local food is pretty horrid, but there's enough Western stuff around to get by.

  7. #6057
    I used to be funny.
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    I feel like you have to deal with the food as part of the experience, to be fair.

  8. #6058
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    Tried it for a bit, it's genuinely shit so why would one continue?

  9. #6059
    I used to be funny.
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    Fair enough. Thinking about it, I'm not sure what about Japanese cuisine I'd be into.

  10. #6060
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I've seen what you eat in the UK, no way Japanese food is worse.

  11. #6061
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Japanese food (like all Asian food) looks quality.

    Bar the mental shit obviously.

  12. #6062
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Isn’t Japanese just Fish and Rice in different configurations?

  13. #6063
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    I mean it's obviously better for you, hence why the life expectancy over there is what it is, but there's absolutely nothing to it.

    Went out with my ex's brother and his Japanese girlfriend and by the time I was eating a horse's hoof in (what I can only describe as) flavoured water masquerading as soup, I was gagging for a burger and coronary heart disease.

  14. #6064
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    I've seen what you eat in the UK, no way Japanese food is worse.
    I've always thought we and the Japanese should have the opposite cuisines. Raw fish and bollocks vegetables in salty sauce should be the fare of a grey island in the north Atlantic, whereas the Japanese pervert/psychopath tendency would be very much at home with boiled offal and potato smileys.

  15. #6065
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    My friend just came back from Japan and she said the food was amazing.

    She said the ramen they have there is unbelievable.

  16. #6066
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Is there actually anything in our 'bland' food owing itself to being rich enough to have just had quality ingredients worth roasting on their own, whilst the French (and all the other poverty countries from Italy to India) had to disguise their weeds and famine-racked cattle with all manner of culinary invention, or is that just the stuff of long eighteenth century cartoons?

  17. #6067
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    As a child of the 80s who grew up in the 90s, you should have the COLLECTIVE MEMORY that British food is utter shite and we rely heavily on overseas imports. A bit like our football league.

  18. #6068
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    British food is class. I'd take it over French or Japanese any day.

  19. #6069
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by randomlegend View Post
    Sushi is amazing.
    As above.

  20. #6070
    I used to be funny.
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    Not sure where to put this but I did witness a fist-fight outside of Greggs on my lunch. One of the regular homeless(?), mental blokes was being pinned down by a workman. Apparently some shit kicked off in the queue. Anyways, the mentalist got up, got knocked down three times by solitary punches and just kept getting up. Like he was looking for a hospital bed.

    Fuck all of that. Although I respect the ability to lay a guy out from a punch they're expecting. The fucking state of this town.

  21. #6071
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Application forms that ask for exactly what’s on your CV.

    ‘What Education do you have?’
    It’s on my CV, mate.

    ‘Work History?’
    Cv.

    ‘References?’
    .........

  22. #6072
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Fuck that shit. Then there's those companies that have software that tries to auto-fill those fields from your attached CV so you'll have to go delete "911 Elsinore Drive, Palo Alto, CA 94303" from your work experiences and "30/06/96" from your educational background

  23. #6073
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    1996?
    I'm a twit

  24. #6074
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    American suburban living.

    My wife was in front of the house this morning and some old cunt approached her and told her that she should cut the grass. How about you do it yourself? Next year I will either move somewhere with no fucking garden or to a place in the middle of nowhere where I don't have any neighbors.

  25. #6075
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Move to the block, Esse.

  26. #6076
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    American suburban living.

    My wife was in front of the house this morning and some old cunt approached her and told her that she should cut the grass. How about you do it yourself? Next year I will either move somewhere with no fucking garden or to a place in the middle of nowhere where I don't have any neighbors.
    Aren't some conned into paying to be in some gay neighbourhood community wankathon too?

  27. #6077
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I think Zom was in a place with a neighbor association. They told him how tall his bushes should be.

  28. #6078
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Yeah remember 7om (faggot) being donned on a weekly basis by the Ned Flanders massive. I would set my front garden on fire.

  29. #6079
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    For all their proclaimed love for FREEDOMZ, they sure love meddling in other people's business. Maybe I should get myself a gun after all, fire some warning shots next time I see the cunt.

  30. #6080
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    For all their proclaimed love for FREEDOMZ, they sure love meddling in other people's business. Maybe I should get myself a gun after all, fire some warning shots next time I see the cunt.
    Just turn up one day in a lowrider blasting some rap with some other immigrants.

    They'll shit their paints.

  31. #6081
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I've neighbours like that so I cut hedges and lawns less often to annoy them more.

  32. #6082
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Yeah remember 7om (faggot) being donned on a weekly basis by the Ned Flanders massive. I would set my front garden on fire.
    Imagine the donning he must be getting in China. Shame that they don't allow him to post here.

  33. #6083
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    lol I forgot about him going to China. What a wanker.

  34. #6084
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    My strimmer had a paddy earlier. A chunk of plastic flew off and then one of the two bits of wire that stick out decided to go back into the hole and I couldn't find it for love nor money, so had to take it all apart. Repacking all the wire back into the spool definitely took a few years off my life expectancy.
    I'm a twit

  35. #6085
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    They usually spring out with a button in the middle don't they?

  36. #6086
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    They usually spring out with a button in the middle don't they?
    Yeah.

    I've never had a problem putting wire back in a strimmer. The wire constantly breaking is annoying though.

  37. #6087
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    Even if you don't live in a HOA they'll try to get you for your grass.

    They call these folks "Code enforcement". They generally drive around in Ford Ranger's with fancy little yellow lights on the top and pull up to your house and give you citations for things like your grass not being cut.

    Buddy of mine let his grow for months and they gave him a $300 citation for it. He was practicing his "FREEDOMZ". They didn't care.

  38. #6088
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Our ED is leaving and part of it is each department has to buy him a book and leave a reason why. I spent like 30 minutes writing a paragraph so i didn't come across as a total mong before reading everyone elses submissions which included finely drafted messages such as "have not read it but I heard it is excellent. Enjoy it!"

  39. #6089
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    Even if you don't live in a HOA they'll try to get you for your grass.

    They call these folks "Code enforcement". They generally drive around in Ford Ranger's with fancy little yellow lights on the top and pull up to your house and give you citations for things like your grass not being cut.

    Buddy of mine let his grow for months and they gave him a $300 citation for it. He was practicing his "FREEDOMZ". They didn't care.
    The weak fuck probably paid up.

    I'd have burned it.

  40. #6090
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    You'd have apologised it and paid then moaned about it on here.

  41. #6091
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Fine, I'd have apologised but like fuck I'd have paid.

    I'd probably agree to cut them to the length they wanted

  42. #6092
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Hired someone to take care of the fucking grass. $50/week.

  43. #6093
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pepe View Post
    Hired someone to take care of the fucking grass. $50/week.
    I thought Mexican labour was cheap?

  44. #6094
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    No Mexicans here. I have to pay American labor rate.

  45. #6095
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    What a shithole.

  46. #6096
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Agreed.

  47. #6097
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    Feel like when we were kids it was more commonplace for us youngsters to go 'round with a mower trying to get an odd $10-20 off your neighbors for a fresh cut.

    I feel like kids are never doing anything outside now.

  48. #6098
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    They'd all get shot these days.

  49. #6099
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Or nonced.

  50. #6100
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco View Post
    They'd all get shot these days.
    They'd be fine if they're white.

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