Paul Ince.
His every touch of the ball brings a tremble to my nethers
I like him a healthy amount and think his career is worth a World Cup win
I like him but sod Argentina winning
He's great, obviously, but I don't care if he succeeds or fails
He's great, obviously, but pundits need to settle down
I'm a racist and that's why I hate him
I'm an idiot and will argue he's actually not all that good
Paul Ince.