Job done. Fucking have it.
adamski He's new, he's not overly offensive and I've not much more to say than that. It's always nice when we get new people on the board, as it's much more of a rarity these days. Stick around, son.
Adramelch I write the same shit about Adra every single year and nothing will ever change. He's Greek, he's a decent chap and that's about it. I promised myself that this list would be fun to write, but we're off to a poor start.
AE Alb! It sucks that Colorado didn't work out for him. But that's the nature of football and I hope it doesn't see him dip out of the game, when he's clearly a very good player. Find another club and make it there. Good luck!
Alan Shearer The 2nd I know he posts, but I can't really remember anything of substance. You can take it either way, it means that you're not doing much wrong, but then again, I'd struggle to think of anything to say about him, if he died suddenly. 'Newcastle fan, liked BMW's, erm, yeah.'
Alex Probably the best 'part-timer' that we currently have on the board. He has a music collection bigger than the whole of TTH put together and he seems to have heard of everybody that's ever stepped into a studio and recorded something. It's mightily impressive. I remember him mentioning that he'd love to open a record store someday, so I hope that comes to fruition.
Andy See Shearer. Lovely chap, but not all that interesting.
Apples Got married recently, iirc? A victim of the dreaded TIMEZONE DIFFERENCE, Apples would probably be more of a fixture if he didn't live on the other side of the planet. He's always seemed alright though.
Bamster Bam's facking boring, bruv. I don't av a facking thing to say 'ere, awright?
Benny Benny is clearly awesome. You'd think you'd get tired of the Lofty photoshops after a while, but it turns out that that's not true. They remain as fresh as the did on the day he posted that infamous rollercoaster picture. The switch between being a Blackburn fan to a Spurs one has been interesting. Normally you could simply put it down to being a GLORY SUPPORTER, but Blackburn have probably won more than Spurs over the last 20 years, so who knows what it's really all about? By the way, what is it that you do for a living? I want to say something that involves graphics, but I'm really not sure. I don't think anyone really knows, to be honest. You're like the Chandler of TTH. Does your girlfriend look like Courteney Cox?
Boydy Has a shit job, apparently. Which is a shame, because he's obviously very intelligent. I remember something about a masters degree in the works, so hopefully that works out and you go into a career that you actually want to be in, what that may be.
Byron Lovely chap. I can't think of too much to say about Byron, as he doesn't
really seem to push to boat out too much with regards to his own opinions. Either that, or he does and they're all completely inoffensive and standard, that I haven't noticed. Apologies if that's the case. Maybe become a bit more like Saint. Ram it down people's throat. The people will love you for that.
Captain Trips He cares, really. He likes to pretend that he doesn't have the foggiest who any of us are, but deep down he knows us all deeply and desperately wants to be involved in some form of TTH meet. I know it, you know it, we all know it. Just embrace it and become a happy chappy. Posting wise, he's not as bad as he once was. He's toned down all of that I AM A REAL AMERICAN (just wanted an excuse to quote that Hulk Hogan song) shit and has become much better for it. Take note, mert.
chaodck He seems like a really, really happy guy. I love that. We have too many negative people on TTH and chaodck breaks the mould a little bit with his beaming smile and his extravagant cooking skills. What's it like to live in Chile? Is it much different to living in other parts of South America, or more of the same? The whole continent intrigues me, and I'd love to visit there one day.
Charlie Charlie is fantastic. His dog seems like the best dog ever (sorry Sama and Frank) even though it completely destroyed his sofa. And living in Taiwan must be incredibly awesome/interesting. I'm not sure I'd be buying weed in the country for the sheer fear of spending the next 20 years in a Taiwanese prison, but props nevertheless. How long are you planning on staying out there for?
Chinny Hill To be honest, it is pretty funny when he comes onto TTH completely steaming and berates anybody who he doesn't like. In fact, apart from that, I don't think he really posts all that much anymore. So at least when we do see him, it's thoroughly entertaining. Oh, and I should mention he's really helpful in the Computer thread when he's sober. I like that version of Chinny as well.
Chrissy Fucking hell, the shitting the bed story is up there with my all time favourite TTH stories. I just find it wonderful in every single way. Good luck with the comedy stuff though. I've not watched any of the Youtube videos, mainly because my Scotch isn't up to scratch, but you seem like a pretty funny guy. Don't give up on it.
CJ I used to enjoy the World Football thread when it was Sama on his own, madly following the Colombian title race or whatever. These days the CJ/Taz love in over Irish football just causes me to skip reading the thread. Irish football ain't got shit on South America. CJ is cool though. Pretty part time these days, but he still chimes in with interesting stuff once in a while.
Corduroy I guess he fell off. I remember the days when people were talking about Cord taking over Wullie's role of 'the funny one' on TTH. He always seemed reluctant to take up that role and has since then faded into the background. He occasionally comes out of his shell and posts something, but it's barely noticeable anymore, and that sucks. Think he's gone through a fair bit of IRL stuff iirc, so it's understandable.
Danny Think he still posts, but not much. Decent guy.
Dark Soldier It's awesome to hear that he's now well on his way to getting his life in order. For a long time I think that a lot of people (myself included) believed DS to be this extravagant enigma of a poster, who didn't give much of a fuck about anything. But I think recently people have started to appreciate him a lot more and realise that he's done a lot of good stuff on the board and is always willing to help people out. He's a top man really, even if he is only a part-timer on the board these days.
Davgooner Occasionaly very funny and the rest of the time he's pretty decent. I think he's been around for donkey's years and has probably seen it all about three times over, which explains his posting style fairly well, I think. Not much more to say than that, really.
Demerit Demerit is an estate agent, right? He's decent in the Werewolf games but is pretty much only background noise around the rest of the forum. I don't have anything bad to say, really.
diljeet He's still around, so you have to give him some credit for that. Better men than him have left the board because of the abuse they've been subjected to. Although I think that's subsided over recent years, as I think everyone has got tired of telling him that he's shit. So it seems everybody has taken to ignoring him instead, which I think is better for everyone.
Dj_Luca Baller. Should post more. I'd love to meet Luca IRL, as he comes across as a very interesting person. So yeah.
Foe It's strange that out of most the posters on here, Foe probably has one of the highest paying jobs. He's taken a lot of stick over the years, but that's quite brilliant. If I'm right, that is. But he must be up there. Anyway, I've always been a fan of our tiger-onesie wearing friend and would happily meet up for a drink if he's ever anywhere near to me.
FrancisWalsh He still depresses me. Think I wrote something similar last time around, but his general disdain for everything isn't even entertaining. Like when GS rants about how shit his job is, at least it's an entertaining read. Giggles' posts aren't even that, so what's the fucking point? Be happy!
Fry Crayola I'm very tempted to write something sexist in here, just to get him riled up.
Hammerstein Hammerstein is an interesting fellow. I can't really make him out and I'm not sure whether he's just a bit eccentric or a full on mental. He's good for the board though as he posts some very interesting stuff and is always trying to initiate discussion. Which is something TTH desperately needs at times, because the majority of us are lazy fucks, who cannot be arsed to even type a few things on a keyboard. Right now the WDYTOE thread is undergoing a seethe about how I've not yet followed through with a list. I'm upto this point now and I'd just like to say that you're all lazy cunts. I'll also be intrigued to see if any fucker pulls this part of Hammerstein's entry up, instead of skipping the whole fucking list and only reading their own name. If I'm taking this much effort to write the first list, you better fucking read it. Jesus, I'm seeting. Anyway.
Harold Bishop That rant would probably have sat better under Harold's entry. Time and time again he manages to sucker people into arguments and goes on to proclaim e-victories because he keeps arguing until the other person dies of complete boredom. Offy said a few months back that IRL Harold is probably the most normal person going. He's probably right.
Henry He's hardly around these days. He's probably one of the people that Harold has quite literally bored to death. Chalk up another e-victory for the man of the people.
hydrocephalus James is cool. I think he's probably a Greek Van Wilder but that's not a bad thing in any way. He ends up with a fit Tara Reid, after all.
Ian I never really understood the 'fuss' about Ian. As in, I think a lot of people had him down as one of the best posters on the board, which is a little bizarre from my point of view. That's not to say that I don't like him, I think he's a sound chap. But he's maybe a little overrated.
ItalAussie He rarely posts all that often these days, but it's generally interesting enough when he does.
Jimmy Floyd Jimmy is an interesting character. I actually find him pretty hilarious, all things considered. I don't think that he actually truly believes most of the stuff that he posts (mainly the foreigner stuff) but then again, who actually knows? He has some very odd views on football and other things, but it's entertaining nonetheless. And he does offer a good amount of insight on many different topics when he's got his serious hat on.
John John is awesome. His posting has taken a back seat over the last 12 months, but he still brings the tunes regularly into the Dropbox folder we have setup. I'm massively grateful, as I'm pretty rubbish at downloading anything house related. I tend to just Youtube various mixes and then forget about them as the weeks go by. He should post more on the board again.
John_Arne One of the slightly mental Liverpool fans iirc. They're always fun to have around, so yeah.
Kikσ Kiko is another one of my favourite posters on the board. He keeps everything light-hearted and has a very dry sense of humour. Has a good taste in music as well, so I'd imagine some serious shapes are going to be pulled at the Kickabout afterparty.
kizmarlo I don't think Kiz fully understands how TTH 'works' yet. He's been extremely prone to going off on one and having a proper seethe over some quite nothing comments in various threads. He's often ended up backtracking once he's been mocked for seething, which is never a good thing. If you're going to have a seethe, fully commit to it. It's better for everyone, that way. Anyway, he seems like a nice chap in general and I'm sure he'll be a very good poster in a year or two.
Laurent Robert Sama is like a dog with three legs, who you can't help but love. But then he will often gain much sympathy, because it sounds like he has a genuinely shit time of it sometimes. Would love to meet him IRL and I'm sure he's a wonderful man.
LeeCovFox Lee is fucking hilarious. He rants about his job in a similar way to GS, only he adds a wonderfully pervy edge to everything which makes his posts that much more brilliant. If he hasn't been locked up in the next five years, he could easily be on Yev levels of stature with regards to the board. I must say, I don't like Nigel Pearson though. He strikes me as a proper chancer, even though he's done very well to get Leicester promoted.
LeedsRevolution A bit of a tard, really. Think he's been through a fair amount of real life shit, so I can excuse it, but yeah. Although he's been much better over the last six months than he was during his early days.
Lewis Lewis is an all round top, top, top man really. I know he finds my life decisions completely baffling (and arguably stupid) but I like to think he respects me a little because I've decided to fully commit to them. He's one of those posters who you can tell are exactly the same away from the board as they are on TTH. Which must be incredibly interesting, as I can imagine a lot of people reacting to him in peculiar ways. I think that's probably why he doesn't have many proper friends IRL. Not because he's socially retarded like I once believed, but more because he will literally say exactly what goes on in his head. And it will run people up the wrong way and then they won't take the time to actually get to know him. I think that's one of the reasons why he's so liked on TTH. Because he's been around long enough that we all know him better than pretty much everyone does IRL and we realise that he's a fantastic bloke.
Lofty He's still utterly disgusting but equally hilarious at the same time. The rollercoaster picture is immortal and will forever be used as a way to sum up Lofty's personality more than anything words ever could. Although the infamous 'tea incident' of a few years back does a pretty good job of it. That remains one of the strangest and funniest stories that I've ever read.
Luke Emia The hip story and the cyst thing must have been properly horrible. Good luck with your recovery.
m1j1browning Good in the Werewolf games, kind of unnoticed everywhere else. See Demerit really.
Mahow It's cool to see him pursue teaching (I think?) and get his shit together. Obviously that has taken its toll on his posting quite a bit, but I don't feel like we're missing much. A big criticism of Mahow was that there was a shitload of posts without any of them really saying anything. So now that the volume of posts have faded, nobody really cares. Especially as it's for the greater good, as I'm sure his actual life is better because of it.
MartinSAFC Played some poker with him on Pokerstars a few months back, which was pretty cool. Very sound bloke.
mert Very part-time these days, which most will have absolutely no problem with. Maybe he's starting to outgrow this place? Who knows. Either way, the record became boring and repetitive a long time ago.
mf_phonics I don't really have much of an opinion either way. He seems to annoy some people, but I've never really had that problem with him.
Multi Has a tendency to go all alpha-male and start sounding like Mert if you get him on the topic of women. Which sucks, because apart from that, he's alright. Multi strikes me as the kind of person that really doesn't fit in to the stereotype of the board, in that he's very different as a person to most of us. But he makes it work fairly well and it's always cool to have people that are different.
nickfootie5 Deleting names for fun now. Come at me. Nick's photoshop skills are better than Benny's. There, I said it. The North Korea photo was an utter masterpiece and there should be some sort of award given out for that alone. Apart from that, he's a solid poster. Good on all things Chelsea and decent everywhere really.
niko_cee I disagree with a lot of niko's opinions on football and I'm of the belief he's the same about mine. He comes across as a sound person though and he's good to have around.
Offshore Toon I've always gone through stages of liking and disliking Offy. At the moment, I'm pretty neutral. He's not been around for a little while due to uni exams, I believe, but when he is around it's always decent for the board. He creates activity, he knows how to make a good thread and is one of those people that you do miss a little bit when they stop posting.
Panda Bear Panda's Facebook is more of a news website than a profile about him these days, which is kinda weird, but he makes it work. He flits in and out of TTH as and when he pleases, but it's always good when he's around. Would happily go for a drink with him if I ever visit Canada or whatever. Plus he seems to be a bit of a boss with women, so it couldn't be bad to hang around with him for a few days and leech off the leftovers.
Pen Benny's entry on Pen had me genuinely lolling and I'll struggle to ever top that. Pen is obviously awesome and whenever he's England again, we should go for a drink again.
Pepe Pepe has grown on me a lot recently. For a long time I never really understood the 'hype' surrounding him, but recently I've decided that I love the type of poster he is. Never serious, here for the BANTER and just generally pretty funny.
Randomlegend RAAAAAAAAAANDREW. He's alright, really.
Raoul Duke Raoul is around a lot, so I feel like I should have more to write here than I do. It's not like Demerit or Browning where he's background noise, because I don't think he is. But I'm just struggling to write anything decent. Maybe he doesn't share all that much about his personal life? I dunno. Seems like a lovely chap, anyway.
Regista Reminds me of a young me. So puritan, so heated on my views on football and generally a bit of a 'good football, mate' warrior. I've calmed down since those days because it just gets tiring banging the same drum over and over again. You'll probably get to that point soon as well, Regista. But yeah, in general I think he's one of the best newbies we've had here in a while. Post more about other things than football (if you already do, then sorry) and you'll be one of my favourites in no times.
Rocchi Can't say too much, but he's a decent newcomer.
ScousePig A bit of a baller, if his exploits in the regular football thread are anything close to the truth. It's a shame he's not going to be at the kickabout, because we could've formed quite the partnership. Now I'm stuck with Benny, who's footballing skills I seriously doubt.
Serpent Gazeux I've said it before, but GS is one of my all time favourite posters. He has a way with words that I just find brilliant and his general disdain for most things is pretty amusing. He's recently transitioned into one of the LADS, which is something I wholeheartedly welcome. Now we've just got to get you drinking and you'll be a fully fledged member of the TTHLADMATES community.
SincereTheRebel His general wonder and curiosity for the most trivial of things is awesome. It's like Sincere is an alien who's landed on Earth and is just trying to figure the world out. His written English has improved tenfold since posting on here (something I think most of us could say) and he seems like he's learned an awful lot in general over the last few years. He's just a proper champion all round, really.
Smiff I sympathise a lot with Smiffy because he takes a massive amount of stick for simply pouring his heart out on the board. I think a lot of people are quite guarded with what they post on here and I think it's very refreshing to see someone post exactly what's going on in their lives, no matter how shit it might be. I can sort of relate to some of the stuff that he's gone through (obviously on nowhere near the same scale) because I think that I'm prone to making the same mistakes over and over again, much like Smiffy. I think that if he became more guarded and more aware of what he posts on here, it wouldn't be the same, so I hope he doesn't change. Although I have to say, the Liverpool stuff was absolutely hilarious and I can't leave that out of this entry.
Snapman More than a little bit weird/mental, but pretty fucking funny when he wants to be. Post more.
Snazz It is Baz, there's just no chance it's not. He's still cool though, I don't think I really disliked Baz all that much.
Spoonsky It's been interesting to see how Spoonsky, Vim and Waffelz have grown up over the last few years. I think Spoonsky has been influenced by the board the most out of the three and I think he's consciously tried to model his personality on a couple of the older lot from here. There's splashes of Lewis, Toby and Panda all in there, which becomes very strange when I say that I find him pretty fucking annoying. He's not done anything offensive to me and I don't believe he's a cunt or anything like that, there's just something there which I find irritable. I apologise that I can't pinpoint exactly what it is.
SvN SvN is a decent, all rounder. Can't say much more than that.
Taz Taz is a proper champion. His posts on football are pretty boring these days (unless he's being serious, when they actually become very good) but he's still a complete boss on every other section of the board. I just hope he doesn't bottle booking this pitch for the 14th, otherwise he'll have the whole board seething. I'm actually pretty glad the responsibility is no longer mine, as I'd have been fucked.
7om Fuck working 80 hours a week in a lab. Fuck that so much. I would also like to echo Benny's question about your wife. Is she actually fit? Are we talking Asa Akira levels of Asian beauty, or does her vagina resemble a dead animal like most of the Asian porn that's on the internet?
Toby Like 7om, I also wonder what Toby's girlfriend is like. Maybe she's the controlling, trouser-wearing type because he's practically disappeared since he's been with her.
Townsend I'm not sure what's happened, but he's descended into full mental recently. He seemed so normal as well. What the fuck has happened?
Trancemeister The gimp mask.
Hahahahahaha.
Vim Vim seems to have undergone a transformation much similar to my own, where a once athletic, fit individual with so much potential has become overweight and ruined everything. We should try and diet together, or something. Vim is cool though, I like him.
Waffelz I get the feeling that Waff has gone through an awful lot of personal stuff over the past few years and that's kind of made him into the person he is now. He seems a little bit damaged and insecure and has taken up a bit of a narcisstic, cocky persona as a sort of cover up. I may be out of line and comepletely wrong with that, but that's the impression I get. Be more like the old Waff. He was naive, but positive and full of potential. This version just rubs me up the wrong way and I'm sure I'm not alone in that.
Yevrah He remains a complete collusus. His posts often read like a tabloid newspaper article, but they're every bit as entertaining. Like a tabloid newspaper, he's wrong a good percentage of the time, but who really cares? He got Moyes watch very right and Taz has not been the same since. That's a proper e-victory. Take note, Harold.
Originally Posted by Hammerstein
Knocked this together in half an hour. There's a surprising number of people who I've definitely seen a fair bit of but who don't seem to bring up distinctive memories. I think it's to do with me viewing this place without avatars or signatures and I often just read posts without looking at who people are.. Good lad though.
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