It's the only thing passing by the sounds of it.
It's the only thing passing by the sounds of it.
4 shits today.
I don't see another coming, so if it does I've probably shat myself.
How many pizzas?
I've had quite a lot recently but none in the last few days. Last night had leeks, potatoes and sugarsnaps. Don't eat breakfast because staying in bed longer is better. Cheese and mayo sandwich for lunch and jacket potato with cheese and beans for dinner tonight.
Tomorrow could be good.
Adding to this subject, I love a good fart.
For obvious reasons my farts always smell worse when I need a shit. Also, they always smell far worse when I'm ill. So much so, I can predict when I'm going to be ill by the smell of my farts. Quite odd.
A day after drinking ale is always a dangerous one re that subject area.
I had 4 litres of stout and a lamb madras last weekend. The next day I nearly had to pull the van over and get out a few times. Never smelled rank like it.
Anyone sharted before? Be honest.
I did, twice.
I absolutely destroyed myself in my sleep after an all day session once. Had all dried by the time I woke and I was that hung over I went back asleep for 3 hours after realising what I'd done.
Several times. One morning a few months ago Lauren thought I'd done a rancid fart so I kept up the lie until she got up to go to work. I'd shat myself really but she'd have killed me. That's just the most recent example.
I reckon that's the most grim thing I've ever read.Originally Posted by Giggles
Farts are the least trustworthy bodily function.
Giggles has posted that story before and it was just as disgraceful then as it is now. Every part of it is inconceivable to me.
I had nearly 20 pints of stout and some of a chicken ball supper from the remains of one on my table. Was in a house share at the time so getting to the shower had to be timed well anyway, though nothing was getting me up first time round.
I don't get the inconceivable bit though. I did a massive shit in my sleep/unconsciousness and once it's out and I wasn't awake then it's out of my hands.
If I had twenty pints of anything in a sitting I'm pretty sure I'd die. I'm not exaggerating either, I really don't think my body could cope with that.
I only did it a few times in my much younger days. 8 now and I'm in bits.
If I hit 6 pints there will be vomit before bed. I just can't do it. I used to be able to but those days are long gone.
It depends on the duration, really. I've hit 20 pints in a day before, but that's been an all day affair. I rarely feel sick from beer, but 3 or 4 vodkas has me all over the place.
I didn't shit myself but attempted to take a dump after an all dayer. Never again, ended up nearly launching shit everywhere as I faceplanted the floor.
Test.
One of you clowns must have displaced a chicken foot because it appears now, i have pliers.
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