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Thread: The Cricket Thread

  1. #6851
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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  2. #6852
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    Don't understand all the ticker tape stuff when you've just drawn the series. You'd have to 'retain the urn' quietly, pack your things and go home.

  3. #6853
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Yep, it shouldn't even come out. Handshakes all round, a pint of bitter and on the next ship from Southampton.

  4. #6854
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Aggers:
    Make the Championship one division
    I want as much focus and energy to go into Championship cricket as has gone into one-day cricket and driven us to a first World Cup win.

    I've always been against two divisions in the Championship; it's always been wrong.

    It means that when there are good overseas players signed - for example, when Glenn McGrath and Shane Warne came to play for Worcestershire and Hampshire - only half our players play against them.

    I think players in the second division are largely unselectable for Test cricket because the standard simply isn't good enough. County members can shout at me all they like, but we see the evidence when they get picked for England.

    Inevitably, any good player will go and play for a first division club, because they know they won't get picked in the second division, and that then creates a further imbalance.

    If we are looking to go forward, and we have these new, centralised teams, it may be that we have to build a structure around that.

    Maybe we do have 12 teams, which are really, very carefully geographically located. You have one division, everyone plays each other and you have fewer, better, players.

    That would be something I would really strongly consider doing - but it'll never happen!
    I don't watch any county cricket so I'm interested to hear what those of you who do reckon to what Aggers is saying.

  5. #6855
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I'm an 18 counties man. The problem with the less teams = higher quality argument is where do all the players come from if you only have 10 or 12 first class counties? And what about the late developers? And what incentive is there for people in the dwindling number of non first class counties to try and play professional cricket?

    How many people, if there are only 110 first XI places in pro cricket, will give up at an earlier age and get a real job?

    Where does Jos Buttler get his first 100 professional games to become the player he is if Somerset isn't a county?

    If you were going to do something like what Aggers says, you would have to also completely reform the entire system so that every region/county has a pathway and lots of cricket. Shrinking the game is a bad idea, albeit those (like Aggers) who earn a living from international cricket may often be blind to this point.

  6. #6856
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    When England won in 2010-11, they batted for 150 overs, or five sessions, in four of the seven innings. Under Joe Root’s captaincy they have failed to do so in 62 attempts.
    Yikes.

  7. #6857
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    Barring Perth, that was just an unbelievable batting performance throughout.

    260 all out (Siddle's hat trick), 517-1 dec, 620-5 dec, 513 all out, 644 all out.

  8. #6858
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Chin up Clunge, my boys are rolling over like seals in a spirited attempt to prevent the title going to Somerset. James Vince doing his bit as well.

  9. #6859
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    It's all over the place. Think we've fucked it.

  10. #6860
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Gotta feel for Stokes atm. How do these people sleep at night?

  11. #6861
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I am quite surprised given the nature of the story that this hadn't already come out.

  12. #6862
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Amazing, even for the Sun, that the editor thought that would make a good front page splash.

    Surrey bringing a tear to the eye here, 7 overs of Borthwick leg spin throwdowns, keep the cider out of that trophy. Zummerset chasing 281 on a minefield to stay alive.

  13. #6863
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Similarly I've just seen that apparently Gareth Thomas' parents found out about his HIV from a journalist before he told them. Classy bunch.

    On the subject of County Cricket I was very pleased to learn recently that there is a player called "Felix Organ."

  14. #6864
    Respect the point. Byron's Avatar
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    Yeah they were covering that in the Private Eye.

    Of course it's a complete coincidence that about two weeks prior, The Sun ran a story claiming that a major sportsman was going to come out as HIV positive.

  15. #6865
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Jimmy'll be rockin' at that result. How have Notts thrown that one away?

  16. #6866
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Christ, what a final.

    T20 finals day must be just about the most English (British) thing going. Glorious madness.

  17. #6867
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    (Soon to be) England’s Harmer running riot

  18. #6868
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I can put up with a lot of fancy dress bullshit around me for a full day of watching Brother Mo. That they got anywhere near in either game was entirely down to his captaincy. Best captain in England.

    The only bad thing about going is all the northerners who want to talk to you. That isn't what we do down south.

  19. #6869
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Bairstow dropped.

    Matthew Parkinson looks like a Wallace and Gromit character.

  20. #6870
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I like the Test squad a lot, although Ed Smith proclaiming Ollie Pope to be the backup keeper whilst Foakes remains on the sidelines suggests he is on some kind of acid trip.

  21. #6871
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Is Ben Foakes from a council estate or something?

    Good average so far, good keeper. What's the problem? Is it too obvious for Ed to proclaim is a maverick bit of selection?

  22. #6872
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Everything we've seen in the Ed Smith era so far suggests they don't give a monkey's about glovework except possibly when we are fielding multiple spinners in the subcontinent. Foakes didn't have an amazing 2019 with the bat ergo no pick.

    This (albeit gargantuan) article is good on the subject: http://www.thecricketmonthly.com/sto...%20could%20bat.

    That said, that article is a couple of years old and cites in-form 50-averaging Bairstow vs Foakes. 35-averaging Buttler vs Foakes is a different fish entirely, so I would guess that either they are using Ed Smith's mysterious 'weighted averages' again, or they are using a qualitative calculation that Buttler's odd explosive knock outweighs the difference between his keeping and Foakes (which, I would suggest, is pretty large).

  23. #6873
    Senior Member Pleb's Avatar
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    Looks like the Somerset-Essex match is going to be washed off if the weather forecast is anything to go by.

  24. #6874
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Jack Leach at it again.

  25. #6875
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    This pitch is a joke. Having it spin is one thing, but this is exploding everywhere to all types of bowling within the first day's play.

  26. #6876
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Result pitch mate.

  27. #6877
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Never fear, Sir Alastair Cook is equal to the task.

  28. #6878
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The Hundred is being launched at the moment and someone's just sent me a picture of various male and female England players lined up in what looks like a police lineup wearing all the different kits, and I kid you not, each one has a different crisp as a sponsor. One has Tyrrell's, Jofra Archer has Pom Bears, a kidnapped-looking Chris Woakes has Butterkist.

    Fucking love the Hundred.

  29. #6879
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Fucking Pombears.

  30. #6880
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The pictures are nothing, the brand identity for each team has just been released, I'm gasping for air.

  31. #6881
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Got a link? My Google-fu has failed me.

  32. #6882
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  33. #6883
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Ali Martin's twitter has them all in a thread. It's amazing.

  34. #6884
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    the Oval Invincibles logo

    the Manchester one is actually pretty neat. The rest, shit.


  35. #6885
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    The "Manchester Originals"? The fuck is that?

  36. #6886
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Right, here is the gold. This stuff is not only 100% real, but is currently the only thing on each team page.

    Toggle Spoiler


    SPARK THE WELSH FIRE

  37. #6887
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    That is atrocious. Manufactured identities.

  38. #6888
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    It’s almost like American sport. I hate it.

  39. #6889
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Every aspect of it is more brilliant than the last.

    Loving the crisp sponsorships.

  40. #6890
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Fucking hell.

  41. #6891
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    The "Manchester Originals"? The fuck is that?
    Pioneers. Revolutionaries. Celebrating a global city of firsts. Laughing in the face of limits. Raising the bar forever higher.

    I'd have thought that was pretty obvious.

  42. #6892
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The best bit is still to come when they all have to draft a 'non-playing player'.

  43. #6893
    I used to be funny.
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    Why is the North all lumped together like that? This is geographic nonsense.

  44. #6894
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Step aside for Northern Superchargers, a team whose drive and determination is matched only by their desire to win. Powered by positivity and people who get stuff done when every ball counts.

    Northern people, cold up there, never been, never will, they are dirt poor BUT THEY'RE HAPPY. All that working, in the mining pits and the pitting mines, and steelworks made out of coal, and coalworks made out of steel, they work hard, beat their wives, and keep posing for photos with the fucking canary because they may be poor, BUT THEY'RE HAPPY. Working people work on their work and work hard to GET STUFF DONE, not work, but STUFF, which is far more important to the northern powered up tragic mining disaster shipyard SUPERCHARGERS.

  45. #6895
    I used to be funny.
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    All to the Hovis theme.

  46. #6896
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Rise with Birmingham Phoenix, and thrive together as one. Bigger, brighter and better united, this team is a celebration of the strength in diversity. Because different is good.

    You see, yeah, in Birmingham you get these people with brown skin and beards, right, and they eat this funny spicy food and some of them don't drink alcohol, yeah, but they like bat and ball games (don't mention the c-word) so we need to monetise them, yeah, I mean, not the women, sorry not the mums, yeah, because they have to cover their faces in public, but the men, yeah, so what we need to do, yeah, is give their team really bright colours, yeah, like the exotic orient, yeah, and use twenty year old catchphrases which went out with Robin Cook's heart, right, because if we can attract the Asian market, yeah, there'll be, like, more wallets at our disposal, yeah, and JUST TELL THEM THEY'RE DIFFERENT, SUSAN. THEY'RE DIFFERENT AND THEY'RE FUCKING BROWN AND THAT'S GOOD FOR BUSINESS

  47. #6897
    I used to be funny.
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    Set that one to Red Red Wine.

  48. #6898
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    Chris Silverwood has been promoted from bowling coach to be the new England head coach.

  49. #6899
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Definitely 100% heard of him.

  50. #6900
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    A decent bowler in his day.

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