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Thread: The Cricket Thread

  1. #5151
    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    Jesus, we're 2nd in the Test rankings. Have NZ ever been as high as 3rd?
    Not since I've been alive (30 years).

    Too shit with Cricinfo to check.

  2. #5152
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Well if the recent teams weren't then I very much doubt that the assortment of bank clerks and medium pacers named John and Jeremy that represented them prior to 1990 would have been.

    They actually have everything as a team. They could (and have) even do well in Asia with Ish Sodhi and this Somerville on the scene.

  3. #5153
    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    I'm not sure if Sir Richard Hadlee had managed to single handily lift the team into the top 3 or not.

    Sodhi, Patel, Santner, Somerville. It's not the most fearsome lineup, but it just about matches Vettori.

  4. #5154
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I regret to inform you that Monty Panesar has been on Celebrity Mastermind.

    https://twitter.com/AndyHa_/status/1083832017979142144

  5. #5155
    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    That is incredible.




    How?

  6. #5156
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    In which season........

    Oliver Twist.

    Fucking hell.

  7. #5157
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    That's even worse than his Celebrity Masterchef. Incredible.

    Was he always such an oddball?

  8. #5158
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    What a childhood.

  9. #5159
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    That's even worse than his Celebrity Masterchef. Incredible.

    Was he always such an oddball?
    I think he has a few mental health problems unfortunately and rather than tackling them head on is being encouraged to go on every reality show on TV. It's a bit unfortunate. You shouldn't exploit someone like that by making them do Mastermind.

    He played Essex league last year and bowled everyone out, so he's still got it, at least for that cricket, he should just carry on and live the quiet life. I'm sure there are more than enough people in Luton willing to sort him out with a job if he needs one.

  10. #5160
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    That was painful

  11. #5161
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    For those so inclined there is a very good new Cricket Sadist Hour out, in which they conclusively debunk the myth that T20 is ruining Test cricket.

  12. #5162
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I've never listened to that yet, I may give it a bash with that one.

    Lol at the story I read that some mugs are spending £12k on tickets for England vs. Australia at the World Cup.

  13. #5163
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Every time I look down the World Cup schedule I sigh because of every game starting at 10.30am for the Indian TV market.

    Logically though one of the only day-nighters is Afghanistan v New Zealand at Taunton, get me involved in that.

  14. #5164
    Romulus Augustulus ItalAussie's Avatar
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    Watching us play is brutal. Fortunately the ODIs aren't on free-to-air television, so nobody is.

    I'm interested to see how Pucovski pans out. Everyone seems to reckon he's something really special, so there's that.

  15. #5165
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    I've never listened to that yet, I may give it a bash with that one.
    Yeah, it's really good. I've seen people online slate Kimber, and generally I think Zaltzman is the worst kind of comfortable middle-class liberal whose desire to smash the system with cutting satire extends about as far as finding rude words to rhyme with the surnames of Tory front-benchers, but it's a really fucking good podcast. They both love and know shit loads about cricket, and have a great dynamic. Kimber is the Bryan Alvarez to Zaltzman's Meltzer ya know?
    Last edited by igor_balis; 19-01-2019 at 01:32 AM.

  16. #5166
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I've never listened to Alvarez and Meltzer but I know who they are, obvs.

  17. #5167
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ItalAussie View Post
    Watching us play is brutal. Fortunately the ODIs aren't on free-to-air television, so nobody is.

    I'm interested to see how Pucovski pans out. Everyone seems to reckon he's something really special, so there's that.
    While watching his highlights the other day (looks really good on the back foot) I was struck that the crowd at Shield games appears to be literally zero. County championship games here are said to be badly attended but the average attendance is actually 3,562 per game, whereas for the Shield it genuinely sounds like the only people there are the two teams (on century applause etc).

  18. #5168
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    Apart from finals they have always been close to zero.

  19. #5169
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    Yeah, it's really good. I've seen people online slate Kimber, and generally I think Zaltzman is the worst kind of comfortable middle-class liberal whose desire to smash the system with cutting satire extends about as far as finding rude words to rhyme with the surnames of Tory front-benchers, but it's a really fucking good podcast. They both love and know shit loads about cricket, and have a great dynamic. Kimber is the Bryan Alvarez to Zaltzman's Meltzer ya know?
    I really like Jarrod Kimber because he's one of those people where the love of the sport is just all-consuming and blows everything else away. I read his book about Test cricket and to be honest it was a bit of a mess, riddled with errors and not brilliantly structured - but that's exactly what he is, a hyperactive stream of consciousness.

    Zaltzman weirdly I find completely unfunny except when it comes to cricket. That's what cricket is to me though, everything is great when you filter it through cricket.

  20. #5170
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    Seems we really are seeing the phasing out of Stuart Broad. Probably got one more classic Ashes spell in him this summer but seems we are moving on.

    Could be another fun series. England so entertaining but still can see a few fuck ups against this West Indies pace attack.

  21. #5171
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Although West Indies have had a decent start, I really love this England team selection. Has all kinds of batsmen and all kinds of bowlers for all situations, AND the best gloveman with the gloves. We'd better win or else they'll change it.

  22. #5172
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Hetmyer batting like Clive Lloyd in a floppy, I have time for this.

  23. #5173
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    Shimron Hetmyer also a far better West Indian cricket name than the other lad I haven’t seen play before... John Campbell.

  24. #5174
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Jimmy Anderson since he turned 33 has 156 wickets at 20.15. In history only five bowlers (three of them spinners, all of them from pre 1960) have taken theirs at a better average after that birthday.

    Overrated etc. We should keep him going well into his 40s if possible.

  25. #5175
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    This seems to be going well.

  26. #5176
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The problem with this is that the clueless cricket blob will draw all the wrong conclusions. PACE AND BOUNCE, NO RUNS FROM THE OPENERS, etc etc. This is the best team we can pick, believe me, although I feel Woakes could get in somewhere, perhaps for Rashid. We're just not at it and getting outplayed by an inspired lineup.

    As if fucking Stuart Broad 2019 would have improved this shambolic match situation. We need all those batsmen because, well, check the scorecard.

  27. #5177
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    77 all out. Fucking hell.

  28. #5178
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I caught the last few wickets, it was as close to the good old days as I have witnessed since the actual good old days. Shame the crowd is all rich Brits, needed a proper jumping old Caribbean ground like Sabina Park. And Tony Cozier on commentary.

  29. #5179
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    My dad said the same thing. If this had been happening 20 or 30 years ago it would have been rocking to the sounds of steel drums, but it was more like spot the local in the crowd. The ball to get Butler and then the one for Foakes (I think) were seriously good balls.

  30. #5180
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    They're 25/1 for the World Cup you know. TWENTY FIVE TO ONE. Outrageous value.

  31. #5181
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    West Indies lead by 615 runs. What times we live in.

  32. #5182
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    The target is under 600 now. Just chip away at it in blocks of 200 lads.

  33. #5183
    Romulus Augustulus ItalAussie's Avatar
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    Jason Holder getting a 200 is amazing. Love the guy.

  34. #5184
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Looking through a few of the results, I know Afghanistan are the kings of dubious age claims among their players but Nepal seem to be keen on giving them a run for their money.

    http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/conte...r/1072488.html

  35. #5185
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    He must have had a bloody hard paper round.

  36. #5186
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    The Sunday supplements in the Daily Yeti are a killer.

  37. #5187
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I've seen more of Burns probably than every major commentator and pundit combined, especially Simon Hughes. The reason they haven't picked him until now is a) Cook has been there, and they've only ever wanted one natural stodger (even with Hameed they tried Duckett first) and b) Burns has a funny trigger movement, a monster backlift and tends to plant the front dog in front of all three, so the theory probably goes that in TEST MATCH CRICKET, at THE HIGHEST LEVEL someone like Mitchell Starc could exocet them in at 94mph and get him lbw.
    I posted this in September about Burns, before his dayboo. Listening to the Sky commentators out on a sun-kissed jolly discover it all for themselves has been quality.

  38. #5188
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    This innings getting run through by Roston Chase has been way, way worse than the first innings.

  39. #5189
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    How many record defeats have we suffered in the past twelve months or so? It feels like a few.

  40. #5190
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    We'd won six in a row before this game as well. We are absolutely mental and I for one am all for it.

    I think the thing about these players is when they get down they just get thrashed. There is so much talent but not a lot of fight. Paul Collingwood has been disintegrating with each studio appearance and with good reason. He nearly melted earlier when Rob Key was saying Ben Stokes needs to play his natural game.

    Best West Indies team for well over 20 years though.

  41. #5191
    Senior Member hfswjyr's Avatar
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    What does a team have to do to beat this Indian side? They're looking unstoppable at the moment. Basically every batsman in the team averages over 50.

  42. #5192
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Early wickets, especially that of Rohit Sharma. They have lost five ODIs in the last year and Rohit's scores in those five have been 5, 15, 2, 8, and admittedly 133 (but they were 4/3 in that game with others departing). If you let them be 60/0 with Rohit having his eye in and Kohli still to come it's game over.

    I actually think they won't win the World Cup for that reason, all the games are 10.30 starts over here and it will do bits in the morning dew. Kohli is smart enough to know that though so will probably chase every time he has the option. They best pray for a June heatwave.

  43. #5193
    Romulus Augustulus ItalAussie's Avatar
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    I will say, they're much more dangerous now than they've ever been in the past, and it's nothing to do with the batsmen.

    India have assembled a legitimately fearsome fast bowling attack. They were the real stars of the Australia series. Even when they've been near the top, India have never quite had reliable fast bowlers. But now, with the ones they've got, I honestly don't think they have a weakness.

  44. #5194
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    In more prosaic news, Tim Bresnan has selected his best XI of players he has played with.

    Cook
    Lyth
    Root
    Lehmann
    Ballance (capt + wk)
    Bresnan
    Rashid
    Broad
    M.Johnson
    Anderson
    Harmison

    He has managed to leave out from that lineup: Pietersen, Trott, Strauss, Kane Williamson, Pujara, Younis Khan, Bairstow and Prior among others. But Gary Ballance keeper-captain definitely the obvious choice.

  45. #5195
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    A lot of confidence in the top order there.

    I love that he bats himself 6. Probably saw that as quite self-deprecating.

  46. #5196
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Joe Denly in for Jennings.

    If that's the direction of travel they really ought to just stick Roy in, or go back to Hales.

  47. #5197
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Joe Denly is there because Ed Smith knows him, there is literally no other explanation.

  48. #5198
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    So we've called up an "opener" who doesn't open for his county team. Am I reading this article right?

    Does he open at all?

  49. #5199
    Senior Member Max Power's Avatar
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    It’s a stop gap until some randomer scores a couple hundreds in the Championship early next summer and is parachuted in for the Ashes.

  50. #5200
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    There are still people on twitter wanting Hameed in. It's almost as if England are the only cricket team in existence and the players are kept in some sort of cryogenic freezer awaiting selection.

    I can guarantee you right now that the runaway county runs leader in April/May will be AN Cook.

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