April Football: Men Getting Hit By Football

[Ian]

Even by my own increasingly low standards I really couldn't think of anything first-post-of-the-thread-worthy for this month. City / Arsenal yawning out a draw as City pretend that at some point they're not just going into Tedium Overdrive to win the title again. The Champions League probably being pretty much decided before the quarters are out. All the other main leagues pretty much sewn up already. The FA Cup could be fun unless City boot Chelsea out. From a United perspective we might make a late run for a Champions League spot or may well fall out of the European places altogether. Still impossible to muster any enthusiasm for watching the useless bastards.

So basically I reckon this is all just filler until the blessed relief of international tournament goodness in the summer.

As such, here's a video of a Hibs player twatting a free kick off the heads of two of his team mates, courtesy of Hans Moleman Productions:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/av/football/68704147

[Shindig]

Well, Gateshead are playing this afternoon as they continue their play-off push. That push will determine whether they enter at the eliminator stage or the semi-finals. Or none if the results really go sideways. Meanwhile, Newcastle's lasses are one win away from promotion to the Championship. They've absolutely smashed it but I have no idea what the level in the Championship is like.

[John Arne]

Emma Hayes shoved and pushed another (male) coach at the weekend, and The Guardian are blaming him #woke #hetoo

[Gray Fox]

She's getting ready for USWNT early it seems.

Turned over to that game as City v Arsenal was an embarrassment. I saw no 'male aggression.'

Just a guy happy his team won the cup, with extra meaning because of one of his players actually nearly dying in front of him at the end of normal time. She's got some serious main character syndrome.

[Don]

Turned over to that game as City v Arsenal was an embarrassment. I saw no 'male aggression.'

Jesus, the sway of the wokerati and their media.

[Lofty]

If the roles are reversed at the end of that game he'd already be sacked.

[Gray Fox]

I also see Evertons' finances in the news again.

They're due their next deduction in the coming week, but even so I think they stay up. Even if you take out their tougher games, they still have to play Burnley, Notts Forest, Brentford and Sheffield Utd at home, with Chelsea and Luton away.

If they lost to Burnley it would liven it all up as it would give them an actual chance to survive. We could well have a situation were Notts Forest go down, but then the appeal reduces their point deduction and they stay up.

[Lofty]

What the fuck are Crewe doing.

[Shindig]

Gateshead match postponed due to waterlogged pitch.

[Gray Fox]

De Zerbi being lined up by Bayern apparently.

I hope so as I'd like to dodge that bullet.

[niko_cee]

Can't imagine a worse fit, I'd heard he was keen to go to Napoli, which sounds much more, well, not sensible but suitable.

[Luke Emia]

Plus one for not wanting De Zerbi. His teams are far too prone to getting pasted by random mid-table rubbish. It looks like Amorim from the mood music of the news I would maybe be interested in Nagelsmann but I think the biggest difficulty with him is knowing if he actually is a good manager or not.

[John Arne]

Yeah, certainly Amorin over De Zerbi. I don't know much about this Amorin guy, but he has a decent record. The only downside is that he prefers 3 or 5 at the back.

[Kikó]

If de Zerbi was called Jose DeZerberim you'd be all over him.

[Luke Emia]

I'm not sure about the Portuguese either. But, as Alonso has said no and he is probably the outstanding candidate I think it's a real struggle like I said I would most likely plump for Nagelsmann if it was me choosing but you don't know if he is more Tuchel than Klopp at this stage.

[Lewis]

View Tweet

The referee wants demoting for getting involved.

[Shindig]

I appreciate that's he's constantly checking his watch.

[Luke Emia]

West Ham need to get Phillips on.

[Luke Emia]

Fuck me Newcastle. Is someone taking the piss by telling me Paul fucking Dummett is still at the club?

[Shindig]

We really should've taken three points from that. One of those games where you really miss Gordon's ability to trip over.

[Ian]

Fuck me Newcastle. Is someone taking the piss by telling me Paul fucking Dummett is still at the club?

I've said this before but between stuff like that and still playing Dan Burn they really feel like when your FM team is nearly read to actually challenge for stuff but you've still got a few of your stalwarts from midtable hanging about.

[niko_cee]

I'll take Bob De Zerbi over some random Portuguese nobody or Julian wearing it for a bet Nagelsman thanks very much.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's not wearing it for a bet, they just have a proud history of those in flashy outfits rising to the top of their field.

[phonics]

He's not wearing it for a bet, they just have a proud history of those in flashy outfits rising to the top of their field.

LSU basketball coach about to take over the game?

[phonics]

I know it's a old man take but I think this new no ballboy rule they've implemented sucks. #NotMyGame

[phonics]

TNT Sports have decided they want to direct this game like a Dutch Arthouse movie and I do not like it.

[Don]

Is this new, yeah? It's fucking hard to get used to but it's a massive improvement, especially if it's high pressing teams and all 20 players are in view.

[Don]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Osama_Vinladen

'Personal life' to fully appreciate the dad's work.

[Disco]

Didn't have the balls to finish the trilogy though did he, unless the daughter is called Thatcher or something.

[Baz]

Toni Vlair

[phonics]

Didn't have the balls to finish the trilogy though did he, unless the daughter is called Thatcher or something.

The sister is called Georgia Bush. (Not joking)

edit: The wikipedia has since been edited. I don't think any of this is true.

[Gray Fox]

That's possibly the worst goal Sheffield United will concede this season.

[Ben]

Plenty of contenders.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bald men v combs on sky sports 7.

[Jimmy Floyd]

A bold move by Ten Hag to select no goalkeeper tonight, but innovation is what drives football forward.

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool doing way too much pissing about with it and not running up the score so far. Could really use some goal difference improvements for after the obvious dropped points on Sunday.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Antony is a mong.

[phonics]

What an amazing game. Chelsea can’t play against anyone who puts basic pressure on people. Meanwhile Ten Hags quality is to let them have 8 yards between any opposition player.

[phonics]

That’s not a penalty.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've never known a player that co-comms are as keen to lay into as Antony. He has the perfect combination of being foreign, flashy and ineffectual.

This could end 9-6 either way.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Palmer is so far above anyone else on this pitch. We'll do well not to lose him to Barcelona or whoever you lose players to these days.

[Luke Emia]

That’s not a penalty.

High bar and all that. If it’s not given as a pen then it doesn’t get overturned. Does look soft as shite though.

[Don]

We really need to get Gomez that goal today because I don't want to see anymore of this charity game bullshit.

[Gray Fox]

Come on lads, for fucks sake.

[Danny]

Bruno with the calculated shank into the air knowing Chelsea are idiots.

[randomlegend]

Chelsea are literally - and I mean literally - the only team we've looked better than when we've played them this season.

[Ben]

You'd be winning on xG.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Both teams are just absolutely embarrassingly shite, and have spent about £1.5 billion between them to achieve it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was quality.

Get fucked Chelsea.

Class by Hojlund to leave it.

[Waffdon]

Pochettino is bloody dreadful but my god Chelsea love an individual howler to give a goal away. Never beat Man U so this will finish 4-4