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Thread: The All New Jobs Thread

  1. #3651
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    No, but he has a long history of being a naughty boy (including a stint in prison for fraud) so would imagine some continuation of that.

    He will live long in my heart for, at the company conference last autumn, beginning his speech with: 'Women do not make reliable employees, some say, but I have seen differently at this company' in a room containing at least 20 women. Nearly shat myself there and then.

  2. #3652
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The remaining MD came in this morning, told me how well I was doing and to expect to be 'rewarded' at the end of the year. Fucking believe that when I see it. Or maybe he'll give me one of the free company baseball caps.

  3. #3653
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    Put it in an email and make sure they respond so it’s captured in writing.

    Also, document in the email exactly what you’ve been doing above and beyond.

    Did you get a sense of satisfaction? Or are you still stressed to high heaven beyond caring?

  4. #3654
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Don't give a fuck, as I am well aware of what I'm achieving, and he isn't the one who decides such things anyway, though he could probably recommend it to the chairman.

    I would get laughed out of town if I put that in an email. Remember this is a company employing 50/60 people but which doesn't have an HR function. It's cowboy central. Most of the tension in management seems to be this guy trying to modernise things as MD, while being pushed back by the 81 year old chairman who says 'Well we didn't do this in 1965, so why should we change now?'

  5. #3655
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Are you on commission, Jim?

    Maybe you'll get the new MD spot.
    Last edited by Boydy; 07-05-2020 at 09:47 AM.

  6. #3656
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post

    I would get laughed out of town if I put that in an email. Remember this is a company employing 50/60 people but which doesn't have an HR function. It's cowboy central. Most of the tension in management seems to be this guy trying to modernise things as MD, while being pushed back by the 81 year old chairman who says 'Well we didn't do this in 1965, so why should we change now?'
    In one of my previous jobs I worked for a fairly large insurance broker which was very much like this. No HR department nowhere for staff to go when they have an issue with management. When I started they had around staff it's now up to around 1000 if not a bit bigger and they still have no HR department my missus still works there and it will never change. Because they have made a success of the business over the past 20 years then the way they do things is the best. For example they only promote managers from within so no new ideas ever come into the company but they don't see that as an issue.

  7. #3657
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Are you commission, Jim?
    lol, no. I have a field manager (one of my 4 separate bosses) who is. He is my biggest ally and always goes into bat for me with the big dogs, which is probably why I'm still here and not on furlough.

    I won't get a promotion any time soon but I do have my eye on maybe getting my own office, as there should be one coming up vacant pretty soon and I'm the only fucker here.

  8. #3658
    The Airport King Magic's Avatar
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    I have to say wall-to-wall video calls is absolutely draining...I didn't appreciate how horrific remote onboarding would be. Fuck this.

  9. #3659
    I used to be funny.
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    You're getting a tractor. That short week got even better. Early finish today and off on Monday. Despite the government's lockdown announcement, we're sticking with working from home for the time being.

  10. #3660
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Jimmy on tour


  11. #3661
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    About right apart from the part where it insinuates I'm a key worker.

  12. #3662
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Cars have keys.

  13. #3663
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I don't deal with cars. I do however deal with crankshafts and they have keys, so you're spot on I guess. I'm basically one of those dead nurses, except I'm still alive and no one has chalked anything about me on the pavement.

  14. #3664
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I hope you’re out lapping it up when they clap for you.

  15. #3665
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    And you're not getting free takeaways.

  16. #3666
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Everyone around here has 'Thank you bin men ' and so on chalked on their front drive by bored children, but do those children stop to think what would happen if there wasn't a ready supply of spare parts for those bin lorries' engines? Ungrateful little shits, and the parents are worse.

  17. #3667
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lofty View Post
    Wife is keen on emigrating to Canada, a mate of mine did similar last year and now lives in a fucking mansion compared to the average UK house and I know he isn't making a mint. I would be up for it but the only person I know in my industry contracting over there is massive mates with my boss so can't really ask. Been searching about on some sites but not seen much relevant to my current job.
    where are you looking

  18. #3668
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    Quote Originally Posted by Panda Bear View Post
    where are you looking
    To be honest I was more looking at what was available and working around that, British Columbia sounds nice but my mate lives in Halifax, NS and that also appeals. I think if we did move it would be for the bigger house, more country style living than metropolitan lifestyle so likely feature me commuting in from wherever.

  19. #3669
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lofty View Post
    To be honest I was more looking at what was available and working around that, British Columbia sounds nice but my mate lives in Halifax, NS and that also appeals. I think if we did move it would be for the bigger house, more country style living than metropolitan lifestyle so likely feature me commuting in from wherever.
    if you're looking at BC and want a house without dying from international speculation, you should look at these three: Langley, Abbotsford, and Chilliwack. you're close enough to drive in to Vancouver whenever you want. if you don't want to drive and rely on metro lines instead, you'd have to go to Coquitlam or Surrey. Coquitlam is right by water, tho, so that's a bonus.


    if Vancouver/the ocean isn't that important to you, I believe CP Rail runs through Kamloops (I'm assuming you need a rail job), which is some hillock in the Okanagan Valley that's pretty gorgeous.


    Halifax is a gorgeous, old-for-Canada city (although technically it is now a county that includes Dartmouth and Bedford). the Maritimes are well known for how relaxed and chill they are, and you'd be right by the water.

    you can also try out Moncton in New Brunswick. three hour drive from Halifax. Moncton will be even cheaper. the knocks against the Maritimes are 1) their depressed economy and 2) Atlantic snow, so a snowstorm can sometimes hit for 2-3 feet.


    if you're willing to put up with a disgusting winter in exchange for a glorious summer full of boating and fishing, you could also check out Kenora in Ontario, which is two hours east of Winnipeg (the nearest big city).
    Last edited by Panda Bear; 11-05-2020 at 07:02 AM.

  20. #3670
    I used to be funny.
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    Ah, Halifax. Once home of the world's largest man-made explosion.

  21. #3671
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    Entering the last rotation around my law firm before (hopefully) qualifying in September and just found out that my final 4 months will be in the department I want to qualify into. Phew.

    Should know by end of the month whether they'll be keeping me on from September but so far so good.

  22. #3672
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Are you working from home?

    MC?

  23. #3673
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    @mo @ScousePig

    Have you teachers been told when you’re expected to be back?

    My wife (teaches year 6) has just been told she’s back full time from June 1st, and the school will be completely closed to kids and staff the week prior while it is “deep cleaned.” It’s outrageous they’re actually going ahead with it.

    Childcare is gonna be a problem. I’ll probably end up doing my work in the evenings and just looking after my daughter through the day. Obviously not ideal!
    I'm a twit

  24. #3674
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    @mo @ScousePig

    Have you teachers been told when you’re expected to be back?

    My wife (teaches year 6) has just been told she’s back full time from June 1st, and the school will be completely closed to kids and staff the week prior while it is “deep cleaned.” It’s outrageous they’re actually going ahead with it.

    Childcare is gonna be a problem. I’ll probably end up doing my work in the evenings and just looking after my daughter through the day. Obviously not ideal!
    Does she not go to nursery yet? We're facing the prospect of my wife (primary TA) having to go back to work sooner than me (secondary teacher), but we have the option of childminder/nursery at least, although not sure how to feel about that as from what I've read it seems fairly evenly split between people saying kids spread it/kids aren't affected.

    We've not had anything about a return to work date, but an email from the head today to say their seeking clarification on the situation with Y10s and 12s.

    Unfortunately I think the unions trying to protect school staff are going to get swallowed up by the right wing media and it'll become 'lazy selfish teachers refuse to work like our NHS heroes'. It's already underway.

  25. #3675
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baz View Post
    @mo @ScousePig

    Have you teachers been told when you’re expected to be back?

    My wife (teaches year 6) has just been told she’s back full time from June 1st, and the school will be completely closed to kids and staff the week prior while it is “deep cleaned.” It’s outrageous they’re actually going ahead with it.

    Childcare is gonna be a problem. I’ll probably end up doing my work in the evenings and just looking after my daughter through the day. Obviously not ideal!
    Take that, Mike.

  26. #3676
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Today it sounded like our company chairman (an 81 year old man in self quarantine) is pushing for those working from home to return to the office asap. Not sure what part of the government guidelines he has been reading.

    The arrogance of rich men is breathtaking sometimes.

  27. #3677
    Just Luca, but still a DJ Luca's Avatar
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    The state of recommending fucking Kenora, Ontario as a reasonable place to live.

    You okay, Panda?

    Northern Ontario is the fucking pits. I spent 3 months in Sudbury (that's only an hour flight form Toronto) on a client engagement and wanted to hang myself, and that was only M-Th.

  28. #3678
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    I have a work call on Teams every morning at 9:15. They’d only booked them all the way until this week, presumably hoping everything would be back to normal by now, so the questions gone out whether they ought to be less frequent. Looks like they’re only gonna be twice a week from now on.

    Moar skiving
    I'm a twit

  29. #3679
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Our daily Teams call is the guaranteed skive.

    This morning we were looking at z-list celebrities on Cameo.

  30. #3680
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    Our daily Teams call is the guaranteed skive.

    This morning we were looking at z-list celebrities on Cameo.
    That’d just piss me off. They’re my colleagues not my mates.

    If work isn’t discussed, why am I wasting my time? I can realistically do my work in 2 hours everyday, but sometimes have to spend another hour making small talk with them. I tend to just minimise it and work away, with the camera and mic off, but I’m there and officially at work and can’t get told off.
    I'm a twit

  31. #3681
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Sounds like a positive working atmosphere.

  32. #3682
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Baz has a proper Jekyll and Hyde situation going on between arch banterlord and miserable shite who has a tantrum about desk moves.

    There are days on our call where I don't get involved much because I'm not in the mood but it's basically time set aside for sanctioned skiving.

  33. #3683
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The Chairman has apparently relented on bringing back people from working from home, after it was pointed out to him that if the 2 remaining people in each department both gave each other CV the company wouldn't be able to function, but he still had a massive tantrum about it. Such an entitled tossbag.

  34. #3684
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    He sounds like a sitcom character that, on screen, would seem like a caricature.

  35. #3685
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    He is a self-made rich man, and in my limited experience they tend to be the most arrogant people on earth, genuinely believing that the fact they have made money and employ people puts them above the law.

    He's also 81 and self-quarantining in his palace in Virginia Water, so lol.

  36. #3686
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    Quote Originally Posted by Panda Bear View Post
    if you're looking at BC and want a house without dying from international speculation, you should look at these three: Langley, Abbotsford, and Chilliwack. you're close enough to drive in to Vancouver whenever you want. if you don't want to drive and rely on metro lines instead, you'd have to go to Coquitlam or Surrey. Coquitlam is right by water, tho, so that's a bonus.


    if Vancouver/the ocean isn't that important to you, I believe CP Rail runs through Kamloops (I'm assuming you need a rail job), which is some hillock in the Okanagan Valley that's pretty gorgeous.


    Halifax is a gorgeous, old-for-Canada city (although technically it is now a county that includes Dartmouth and Bedford). the Maritimes are well known for how relaxed and chill they are, and you'd be right by the water.

    you can also try out Moncton in New Brunswick. three hour drive from Halifax. Moncton will be even cheaper. the knocks against the Maritimes are 1) their depressed economy and 2) Atlantic snow, so a snowstorm can sometimes hit for 2-3 feet.


    if you're willing to put up with a disgusting winter in exchange for a glorious summer full of boating and fishing, you could also check out Kenora in Ontario, which is two hours east of Winnipeg (the nearest big city).
    Thanks for the indepth guide! The water would be nice but not essential. The wife prefers rural areas with woodland as that is where she grew up. Travelling on the metro would be decent especially if I could get a job with them as it would eliminate one cost, I have been commuting to work for free for nearly 15 years so would be a bonus to avoid paying now. All comes to down to the right jobs opening up though which I can't see at the moment.

  37. #3687
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian View Post
    Baz has a proper Jekyll and Hyde situation going on between arch banterlord and miserable shite who has a tantrum about desk moves.
    I'm a twit

  38. #3688
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Are you working from home?

    MC?
    Yeah, I've been working from home for 8 weeks now and quite enjoyed it tbh.

    Magic circle? If so then nah, not my bag. Working for a national firm in Cambridge and it's been a really nice place to work for the past two years so I'm happy with my non-London decision. Saying that, I imagine my partner will want to move back to Kent one day though so I'd probably switch to our London office if/when that happens.

  39. #3689
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AyDee View Post
    Yeah, I've been working from home for 8 weeks now and quite enjoyed it tbh.

    Magic circle? If so then nah, not my bag. Working for a national firm in Cambridge and it's been a really nice place to work for the past two years so I'm happy with my non-London decision. Saying that, I imagine my partner will want to move back to Kent one day though so I'd probably switch to our London office if/when that happens.
    Fair play, thought you might have ended up following that well trodden path.

  40. #3690
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luca View Post
    The state of recommending fucking Kenora, Ontario as a reasonable place to live.

    You okay, Panda?

    Northern Ontario is the fucking pits. I spent 3 months in Sudbury (that's only an hour flight form Toronto) on a client engagement and wanted to hang myself, and that was only M-Th.
    it's gorgeous in the summer!! they could live in a cabin on a lake island and boat to town in the summer or drive on the ice roads in the winter!!



    (my wife's from there)

  41. #3691
    Just Luca, but still a DJ Luca's Avatar
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    The proximity to the thriving metropolis of Winnipeg must also be seen as an absolute win.

  42. #3692
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luca View Post
    The proximity to the thriving metropolis of Winnipeg must also be seen as an absolute win.
    Winnipeg is mad cute, you hater

  43. #3693
    I used to be funny.
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    Describing a city as cute sounds like the words of a deviant.

  44. #3694
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Just had our daily Teams call there and one of the guys who is a notorious bullshitter was sitting in a normal but slightly different room to what he normally is. Didn't think anything of it until he lifted his arm to grab a drink or something and it flickered like mad as the Teams custom background thing does.

    Had a closer look and he was obviously using the Teams background function just to be in a slightly nicer room. If you're going to pretend your house is nicer than it is have a bit of ambition, man.

  45. #3695
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    I'm so bored of getting 150 emails a week from KS3 kids with their work (some of which is brilliant, some of which is laughably shit, like no effort has been made whatsoever) and just giving the same old response thanking them for sending it and their effort. Just counting my lucky stars that out of the thirteen classes that I teach, only around half are bothering.

    I've got to host an 'online lesson' in a bit with my year 12 class who are so apathetic it is painful. One's dropped off the face of the planet, one's doing really well and the other two are so lazy it's unreal. They can't even be arsed to get out of bed for 11am (when I normally do my lessons).

    I need a change of school and to be back in the classroom.

  46. #3696
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ian View Post
    just had our daily teams call there and one of the guys who is a notorious bullshitter was sitting in a normal but slightly different room to what he normally is. Didn't think anything of it until he lifted his arm to grab a drink or something and it flickered like mad as the teams custom background thing does.

    Had a closer look and he was obviously using the teams background function just to be in a slightly nicer room. if you're going to pretend your house is nicer than it is have a bit of ambition, man.
    I'm a twit

  47. #3697
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    How does “secondment” work? Been sent a “secondment opportunity” basically doing the same job in the same building, but for a different employer (ikr ) who happen to pay a fair bit more for the same roles at my place.

    Their staff member “has taken a different 12 month secondment position” leaving this one open. It’s for an initial 3 month period, with the possibility for further extension. Presumably to test you’re not useless before committing to the full 12 months.

    How is that different from the standard “temporary contract” stuff? Can I expect to just waltz back into my current job after the 12 months is up? If not, why do people risk their current job to go do something else (or EXACTLY THE SAME, in my case) only to lose their actual job when the person whose seat you’ve kept warm returns?

    My idea is I’d be so good they’d keep me on and I’d basically be giving myself a payrise, but obviously that might not happen.
    I'm a twit

  48. #3698
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    It's as you say. You 'temp' in a role, then return to your original post upon completion.

    Although quite often Secondments get made permanent.

  49. #3699
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    What if my current bosses are like ‘nah’ though?
    I'm a twit

  50. #3700
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    They could theoretically make you redundant.

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