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Thread: The All New Jobs Thread

  1. #4701
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    I remember at Morgan Stanley one guy they had on file who basically sent in a south african passport and then as his picture, basically a sketched version of what he would look like (a drawing). It was laughably bad. Some other guy called a few times saying he had been attacked and now needed a money transfer from his account to a new one, sure mate.

  2. #4702
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I worked at BHS (Rip) for a bit when I was about 19 and one of the old biddies got done over by one of those Change Swapping Scams about 10 times.

    She ended up having to be baby sat by a baby faced, 19 year old me, which seeded a hatred that she probably still holds from her grave.

  3. #4703
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    I worked at BHS (Rip) for a bit when I was about 19 and one of the old biddies got done over by one of those Change Swapping Scams about 10 times.
    Someone tried that on me once and I was adamant I had given them the correct change, because I’m Baz, so printed off the till report for the day and started counting out the money to prove myself to the wannabe thief and my colleagues. About 45 seconds into it he miraculously found the other £20 on the floor beside his feet. Dickhead.
    I'm a twit

  4. #4704
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    I worked at BHS (Rip) for a bit when I was about 19 and one of the old biddies got done over by one of those Change Swapping Scams about 10 times.

    She ended up having to be baby sat by a baby faced, 19 year old me, which seeded a hatred that she probably still holds from her grave.
    Baby headed.

  5. #4705
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    I tried to read that explanation and got a brain aneurysm. Clearly written by someone liable to falling for the scam.

  6. #4706
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Basically they just keep asking for different denominations and piling on waves of confusion.

    So they get a £20 note as change, then ask for 4 5's, oh actually I need a trolley, can I have some pound coins? This notes a bit damaged can I have a fresh one? Sorry love you've only given me 2 fivers you still owe me a tenner.

    It must have a low success rate.

  7. #4707
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Yeah, if you don't show the authority to always revert to square 1 before meeting the new request you're fucked.

  8. #4708
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Back to being the only one in the office (from my department) and finding that the main constraint is being sent Teams messages by the homeworkers asking me what it's like in the office.

    What do you reckon, pal? There are desks, chairs, a ceiling, lights. No people.

  9. #4709
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    First day back today. Hundreds of emails, got a plasterer in all day for two days and no childcare for three days. Not good.
    I'm a twit

  10. #4710
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Having loads of fun and games with Brexit today as the reality sets in for business. Most things will be ironed out within a couple of weeks once everyone gets used to it, but the main takeaway so far is that whole swathes of Europe appear to be completely unprepared for it, including more than a handful who have never heard of Brexit and didn't know that the UK had left the EU until I told them.

    Whoever is in the customs clearance business will be making an absolute bomb out of this, on both sides of the fence.

  11. #4711
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Our lot seem to be sticking it out this time around, not that they actually closed during the summer. As a result I have pretty much nothing to do, I've run through all the little jobs that always get put off and am now seriously considering bringing a book in to pass the time. I reckon my entire output for this week could have been knocked out in a day, probably less.

  12. #4712
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    Job is continuing remotely in the same way as it was working face to face. I'm offering the same service to people as before but just online instead of in person.

    My colleague, who is the person I've moaned about on here previously, is offering a much reduced service. So where people were offered 4-5 hours each week, they're now getting 1 hour. I'm meanwhile doing the full service as before.

    She's recently tried talking to me about how I should be offering less too, because her lot will be annoyed if they hear that my lot are getting so much more than her lot. We need to be offering the same thing, she says, because otherwise it's not fair.

    The nerve. Just do your fucking job? How about that?

    I'm happy with what I'm offering, the service users are happy...I'm carrying on as before. She should do the same, I'm not colluding in this. Fucking stupid.

    Our manager was in the video call too but didn't say anything. She's claiming she's too busy to offer more, though she's not gone into any detail about what she actually needs to do and why it isn't possible. I like this job but a bit confused at the management of the place sometimes. On the bright side, I do have relative freedom to do what I want. Just so happens that 'what I want' is to go home feeling like I've done a decent job and done justice to the clients. If 'what I want' was to fuck about then it seems like I could get away with it.

    Don't give a shit if other people arse about, whatever. I can't control it, it's their business. But asking me to reduce my contact time to make them look better? Nah mate, fuck that.

  13. #4713
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Man takes ewhoring serious
    I'm a twit

  14. #4714
    I used to be funny.
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    I'm still in the same mode I was in last year. Once we get caught up with the backlog (we're three weeks back at the minute but our output's ramped up. And one of those weeks is Christmas so we might as well be up its arse.), I don't know what work they'll have for us.

    At least working from home makes it go quicker. Roll on March.

  15. #4715
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Flash being end of life is proper end of days stuff. I figured it would carry on working, but you'd have to bypass some warning first, but it seems completely dead with no way to get it to work on any browser. One of the services my work commissions uses flash for their website and pre-covid (and presumably when things are normal again) I use it most days to check the number of health checks, among other things, done by local GP practices. We pay a lot of money for this service. And now I can't access anything. I emailed tech support and got this response:

    We were under the impression that browsers were going to stop new downloads but existing ones remained however on checking my Chrome, IE and Edge it looks like the plugin links to the Adobe Flash page which is EOL.
    Fucked it.
    I'm a twit

  16. #4716
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    What sort of spastic do you have to be to just do nothing about the Flash EOL when your website runs on it.

  17. #4717
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Even I could have told them that was going to happen, there's a reason that particular sites have been compiling old Flash based things.

  18. #4718
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    The first result on Google is pretty unequivocal:

    Since Adobe will no longer be supporting Flash Player after 31 December 2020 and Adobe will block Flash content from running in Flash Player beginning 12 January 2021, Adobe strongly recommends all users immediately uninstall Flash Player to help protect their systems.
    Cretins

  19. #4719
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    We sent out emails to all our customers, some of whom are of course now claiming they never got them.

  20. #4720
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    We pay them £48k a year for their service too. Gonna throw this into my longstanding “bin them off” campaign and push a spreadsheet I made into the picture, in an audacious attempt to get an unscheduled payrise.
    I'm a twit

  21. #4721
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    for £48k a year just hire someone with a few years experience who could build it out properly

  22. #4722
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    It doesn’t work like that in local government.
    I'm a twit

  23. #4723
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Despite only being in my new role for 10 weeks, I've somehow pushed through a transfer to a far more convenient site. Big, big win.

  24. #4724
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    Moved from the dining room table to a desk at a spare room?

    Solid upgrade.

  25. #4725
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    Wanted to share a couple of websites with my tutor group this morning via Teams - checked to make sure all the tabs open were appropriate, shared the websites with them, then realised this place is bookmarked in the bookmarks bar. So if we've had a a flurry of sign ups today, that could be why (it's entirely unlikely as the edge lords weren't present and the rest don't give enough of a shit).

  26. #4726
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Any hotties in the class?

  27. #4727
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Taz aiming to lure a child in with the offer of a sweet bike.

  28. #4728
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    We all knew the destination, I'm just glad Taz has now reached it.

  29. #4729
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    I'd have to leave it to Baz to determine any 'chernos'.

  30. #4730
    I used to be funny.
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    I'll always read that as "Chemo."

  31. #4731
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Whatever does it for you.

  32. #4732
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Just got a notification reminding me that my E-Learning needs to be completed today. 11 of the bastards. From 'Equality & Diversity" to "DriveWize".

    Fuck off.

  33. #4733
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Give me strength.

  34. #4734
    Senior Member CJay's Avatar
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    Post-it with ‘remember to blink’ on your monitor.

  35. #4735
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Just had an email from someone called Helen with (she/her) in her email signature. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the need for this kind of clarification.
    I'm a twit

  36. #4736
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    It's a good practice and that's coming from a geezer who ain't got no time for those LGBTQ+ mentalists.

    The amount of times someone has a dirty ethnic name you can't distinguish the gender of and without this you're left with normalising some names based on subjectivity and that will invariably lead to inequality and all that other melty shit. Don't let the trannies own this, it has its own value.

  37. #4737
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    There was a classic case in one of my previous jobs of a lady having the Indian surname 'Dave' (pronounced Da-veh) and the whole time she just got emails saying 'Hi Dave, alright mate, how you getting on'. Even a she/her wouldn't have prevented that but it might have flattened the curve a bit.

  38. #4738
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Just put Miss/Mrs/Mr in front of your name.

  39. #4739
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    Just put Miss/Mrs/Mr in front of your name.
    That's basically what is being done but in a less egotistical manner.

  40. #4740
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    And twice the sense of superiority.

  41. #4741
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    I’ve always used they/their 99% of the time anyway, due to communicating with plenty of “Asians” for my entire working life. But cmon, if your names Helen...
    I'm a twit

  42. #4742
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Yeah so it saves us having to reword our correspondence. If Helen doesn't make it clear that there is a need for her to do it, Rumbidzai/Alex may be left to feel a bit different. And we can't have that, obvs.

  43. #4743
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    https://www.babynameshub.com/boy-names/Helen.html

    Helen has been used for males.

  44. #4744
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    The yanks also have birds called Andy. Them/they the lot of them.

  45. #4745
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    I think it's an inclusion thing as well. Like it or not, we live in an age now where some people are in a position where they need to clarify their preferred pronouns. There are people who don't need to do this (like the ubiquitous Helen) but do so as a symbol of allyship, to try and lessen the sense of 'otherness' that might be felt.

    On the flipside, in EduTwitter terms, someone with pronouns in their bio is usually a bit of a whopper/a nasty piece of work.

  46. #4746
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry View Post
    The (presumably) bloke commenting on that being chuffed that he’s the only person called Helen.
    I'm a twit

  47. #4747
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    I/we (depending on if Manc also shares the same employer) have been offered the most outrageous of pay rises on top of 5 days extra AL and 2 days per week wfh written into contracts. God bless the fucking unions.

    You just know there will still be a bitter minority who complain because their lunches have been cut short by 35 seconds or some shit and if they lead to the rejection of this offer, rest assured, I'l cut something else of theirs.

  48. #4748
    Senior Member Manc's Avatar
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    Major coup.

  49. #4749
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    It will be a sop for when they cut your numbers by twenty per cent next year.

  50. #4750
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Can public sector even get rid of anyone without their agreement? Not in my experience. If they want to reduce numbers they'll just let the natural churn deal with it.

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