Jesus fuck I was half expecting this to be your mum saying you were no longer with us.
Jesus fuck I was half expecting this to be your mum saying you were no longer with us.
It'd be my brother if anyone. My mum can barely use email and still goes through the program guide on sky to change from BBC1 to BBC2.
The younger one or the mental one?
I think the mental one would fit in well here.
That's a plus. I never felt that way inclined either. Life is the longest (and only?) thing you'll go through and you might as well stick it out because it always ends in death. Persevere. Something positive will come of it. The further away I get from my depressive spell, the more I start thinking I'll never hit that point again.
Brains are weird.
Can you get your brother on here? If you don't feel comfortable just off yourself and leave one of Baz's calling cards in your pocket.
Also why didn't you reply to my supportive PM? I was genuinely worried.
If you were my doctor I'd probably get a second opinion.
Good to have you back kidda.
Didn't realize you weren't doing so well RL, hope you feel better as meaningless as this post is
We are a community at the end of the day. TTH has got me through a lot over the years (however much I haven't discussed it).
Is it migraines that are your problem, RL? I'm assuming the medications you're on don't work?
I think the fact I have the migraines has really not helped, but whether I'd be enjoying medicine without them I really don't know.
I've just had so many years now of health problems stopping me doing what I want to do and being what I want to be and achieving what I'm capable of and it's EXHAUSTING. The migraines started at sixth form which was a nightmare - my attendance was barely 50% through my A-levels - but they were pretty decently controlled for the first couple of years of Uni. Then I had chronic fatigue and had a year out with that.
Since then migraines have been a varying but constant problem. I'll have a good spell but then it'll all go to shit and I'll have 5 days off in 2 weeks and feel shit and under pressure to catch up and I don't know...it just takes so much effort to pick yourself back up after every shit run with it. It's affected how well I've done - particularly on the clinical side - and given me a bit of a mental block with clinical exams. I have really crippling anxiety for them now (written ones are alright) whereas when I was 15 my self-belief in my ability to perform in exams/academically knew no bounds to be honest. I still know I'm capable, but I constantly get knocked down and have it taken away from me by something I don't have a lot of control over and it's really, really hard to deal with.
It's just stupid things as well, like I really love sport and in particular I've really got into playing badminton to a higher level in the last year or so. If all things were well I could get to a decent county standard I think. But then I get arthritis in my toes. And then I get diagnosed with chronic exertional compartment syndrome and I've got to have surgery for that, and it's just another thing I love that I can't get to my potential in and it's so frustrating. And I can't exercise much because of it (and I comfort eat) so I've put on weight.
On the topic of migraines and medications and stuff, I've tried everything anyone's ever heard of and ten things they haven't. I've seen GPs, neurologists, headache and facial pain clinics and been to the national migraine centre in London. The advice and treatment I'm on now helps massively - without it I have 2 or 3 migraines a week, every week and each one is a full day out with the headache and then another day being useless from the 'hangover' - but it doesn't take them away, and I still have really shitty spells as I said. Stress/tiredness is a big trigger for me and medicine is stressful and makes you tired - I'm just not sure I'm ever going to be able to sufficiently manage them whilst I'm doing it and to be able to do it.
So as I started off saying, whether I would have come to feel like this about medicine had it all been relatively smooth sailing, I don't know. Probably not, since it wouldn't have been anywhere near as stressful and I'd have had more opportunity to find the enjoyment in it (I did enjoy it in the dim and distant past). But I do have them, and this is how it's happened and this is how I now feel.
It's so hard to know what the right thing to do is. Every option has a million "Yeah, but...."s attached and I just don't know. I don't know whether I'll feel better about medicine if I'm on a whacking great dose on sertraline. I don't know if my migraines will ever be manageable enough to do it, even if I want to. I don't know if if I quit, I'll just hate something else just as much because the same issues will affect me. I don't know if I even can push on to the end....I've seriously felt like I was going to just fucking lose it at points over the last month or so. Maybe I'll fail anyway.
Really what I need is a break, but I've now got a 4 week elective on a forensic psychiatric ward. Perhaps one of them will do me in and make my decision for me.
Lyme disease, mate.
There was a girl in my school who was never well and it was always to do with some migraine bullshit. We just assumed she was a needy lesbian. I guess that's also the case here.
I was about to post something for you in the babes thread but you can go fuck yourself.
I'm not sure whether that just sounds creepier than it's meant to, or whether it really, really is.
It was Benny who was madly in love with her, was it not?
Really? I could have sworn it was magic.
Lyme disease, yeah?
I'll get tested, mate, thanks.
Has it ever been suggested? I am actually being serious. John Caudwell was bealing all over the radio about it last year because his son spent years doing what you have described, moping around like a mimsy and thinking he was depressed, and it turned out to be that.
It's never been suggested, no. I think it's pretty unlikely for a number of reasons, but I'll mention it next time I see the GP.
If it is I expect a hamper full of bakery things.
If Greggs don't do gift baskets, they fucking should.
Lyme disease is something we have to be wary of here. That certain tick is rife around here. I did a bit of gardening s few weeks back and when I was getting into the shower I noticed one of the little bastards digging into my arm. Got him out pronto.
On the subject of headaches, I've started developing them often. Usually on the right side of my head going into my neck and shoulder and there is always a bit of vertigo thrown in for good measure as well. I'm not sure if it can be classed as migraine though because I don't get photophobia or nausea. I don't even know what the trigger is either, if there is one. I saw a doctor last year and had an MRI and CT scan and found nothing so kind of fucked it off and tried to forget about except it's persistent. Dot really know what to do about it.
Don't even bother with "grow up" either, Lewis, you pleb.
Maybe you didn't get the tick out quickly enough.
It's all that squinting at family gatherings.
These CBT sessions really are making me realise just how fucking mental I am.
Go on, give us an example.
We could have told you that for free.
I know you're not paying for them you parasite. It is the hard working Brits I worry for.
Don't worry, Chinny will have me shipped out soon enough
Stop attention seeking Moam. Just cheer up and stop dwelling on things.
Prescribed some antidepressants today with some cbt to follow. Fucking brilliant.
Everyone in my immediate family has at some point or another. Them genes.
.....
I love the word mimsy. I'm gonna call my flatmate one when I get a chance.
.....
It was good advice as well, given what a state he is.
I'm just wondering why smiffy hasn't sold his magic cure to the NHS yet.
Maybe he has. He's a mental health nurse, isn't he?