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Thread: Depression

  1. #551
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    He might have been an actual doctorate-having doctor. We should have better titles really to reflect our contribution to human understanding. Letting any medical graduate with a certificate in Googling use the title diminishes us.

  2. #552
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Psychiatrists are doctors.

  3. #553
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Psychiatrists are doctors.
    That dropped out of becoming proper doctors.

  4. #554
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    No, they're literally medically qualified doctors.

  5. #555
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    This is what I mean. We need some hierarchy. I remember some lass Palestinian Jeff was messing about telling me she wanted to specialise in skin because it was the hardest field. Really love?

  6. #556
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    The NHS sounds grim.

  7. #557
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    No, they're literally medically qualified doctors.
    Yeah on paper but they're not really. Being a doctor of mental stuff is like saying a bricklayer is a doctor of cement.

  8. #558
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    They are qualified GP's that do more study...

  9. #559
    Senior Member igor_balis's Avatar
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    Never change, Giggles.

  10. #560
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    Yeah on paper but they're not really. Being a doctor of mental stuff is like saying a bricklayer is a doctor of cement.
    What?

  11. #561
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    lolling out loud at that FACT.

  12. #562
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    lolling out loud at that FACT.
    Pile on!

  13. #563
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Nurses are the divvy ones who direct traffic around the roadworks.

  14. #564
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    Nurses chain smoke and get diagnosed with mentall illnesses.

  15. #565
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Dr of the sads.

  16. #566
    Senior Member dino's Avatar
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    Change Giggles' username to doctor of cement please.

  17. #567
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Nurses are just flight attendants of the land.

  18. #568
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    They're more like indoor Traffic Wardens, the miserable cunts.

  19. #569
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dino View Post
    Change Giggles' username to doctor of cement please.
    He's a Doctor of deliveries, so he's basically a Midwife.

  20. #570
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Pleb is a doctor of trolleys.

  21. #571
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    I believe if you have a medical degree and a PhD you're officially Dr Dr.

  22. #572
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queenslander View Post
    They are qualified GP's that do more study...
    Both are qualified doctors who've done additional but different further study. I'm not a GP just cus I've finished med school.

  23. #573
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    He's a Doctor of deliveries, so he's basically a Midwife.
    I deliver Amazon packages rather than children so I'm clearly more important.

    But really how much does it take to say 'straighten yourself up and get to fuck on with things' in a nice way, and throw some tablets at someone. Though you'd probably need a doctorate to weed out all the cunts these days who have "mental health issues" as a fashion statement.



    .
    Last edited by Giggles; 26-01-2019 at 04:30 PM.

  24. #574
    I used to be funny.
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    Give it a couple of years and they'll deliver children as well.

  25. #575
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by randomlegend View Post
    Both are qualified doctors who've done additional but different further study. I'm not a GP just cus I've finished med school.
    You should Google how to be a GP.

  26. #576
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Toon View Post
    Pleb is a doctor of trolleys.
    More like a doctor of trolling.

  27. #577
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    Quote Originally Posted by randomlegend View Post
    Both are qualified doctors who've done additional but different further study. I'm not a GP just cus I've finished med school.

  28. #578
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I know posts like this generally attract nothing but jokes, but fuck it, I need to process.

    My wife is currently up at the hospital with our 5 month old, he's been admitted because he's not gaining anywhere near enough weight, and they're worried there's a more sinister explanation than just 'reflux'. He was born weighing 8.5lb, he's now just over 13lb. Even factoring in his genetic predisposition to having a tiny head, that is a worrying growth rate.

    So now I'm sat at home, 3 year old in bed after sobbing her heart out because she's missing her mum, and I don't actually know what to do with myself. I feel completely empty. I should probably be sad or angry at the world, but I'm just, well, empty.

    The inevitable Google searches I shouldn't be doing have chucked out everything from Leukaemia to Crohn's disease, and as selfish as this is, I don't know that I could deal with anything like that, and the prospect of doing so has just left me staring blankly at the wall for about 20 minutes.

    For 5 months we've been battling this and for 5 months he's just been getting worse. I don't know that I'm depressed, but I feel like I've just given up.

  29. #579
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    You might want to consult a doctor of cement before you Google yourself into a panic.

  30. #580
    Lost the old board bruhnaldo's Avatar
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    @Spikey M my boy i know you're feeling down and out but I promise you once they figure out what's going on your natural instinct will kick in and you'll just say "fuck it, this is just something we gotta do" and you're gonna be there for the little guy to the absolute fullest.

    You guys will get through this. The problem is you just don't know what's going on so you obviously feel helpless cause there's literally nothing you can do right now.

    I'm sure you're very stressed out but I promise you guys will get through this. Just gotta figure out what avenue to take. Once they diagnose the problem, you'll spring to action and it'll be fine xx

  31. #581
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    That's how I tend to handle stress too, Spike. It's great for pushing on and getting things done, but is almost certainly depression.

  32. #582
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    This is probably going to highlight my complete lack of knowledge on Mental Heath Issues, but I thought 'depression' was for when you have no legitimate reason for feeling how you do, it's just your bodies chemistry being a cunt?

  33. #583
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Depression is a diagnosis based on symptoms. It can have an obvious cause, no cause at all or anything in between.

    This is the description from the international classification of diseases, which is one of the two main bibles for mental health diagnostic criteria:

    the patient suffers from lowering of mood, reduction of energy, and decrease in activity. Capacity for enjoyment, interest, and concentration is reduced, and marked tiredness after even minimum effort is common. Sleep is usually disturbed and appetite diminished. Self-esteem and self-confidence are almost always reduced and, even in the mild form, some ideas of guilt or worthlessness are often present. The lowered mood varies little from day to day, is unresponsive to circumstances and may be accompanied by so-called "somatic" symptoms, such as loss of interest and pleasurable feelings, waking in the morning several hours before the usual time, depression worst in the morning, marked psychomotor retardation, agitation, loss of appetite, weight loss, and loss of libido. Depending upon the number and severity of the symptoms, a depressive episode may be specified as mild, moderate or severe

  34. #584
    I used to be funny.
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    I always figured depression always comes from a reason. The guys I see that claim for it have usually had long-term unemployment or some kind of trauma in their life. From personal experience, I knew why I was depressed and managed to sort my situation out. That can be hard to do if you've lost the motivation for it. Thankfully, I did get to the point where, like Bruh says, "Fuck it. I need to do this."

    Chin up, Spikey. There's nothing unusual about how you're feeling and plenty of other parents have gone through the same thing. Persevere and you'll get through it.

  35. #585
    Senior Member igor_balis's Avatar
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    Alright, gang. Anyone have issues with OCD/generally obsessive thought processes? I'm not at washing my hands until the skin falls off levels, but some mornings I end up checking all the hobs on the oven are turned off about 5 times. That kind of stuff doesn't really bother me cus it's not massively intrusive, though it's probably the most cliche OCD symptoms I have.

    However I have a tendency to get fixated on some fairly insignificant thing and it totally takes over my brain and gets me down despite knowing it's fucking trivial.

    A typical thing is CLOTHES, which seems to recur every few years or so. I realised the other day I basically don't have enough clothes, and need a few new t shirts and jeans and stuff. Rational response would be to figure out roughly what I want, go on some websites, buy those things, great.

    Instead I can't help but spiralling into overthinking and analysis paralysis with about 29 tabs open on google chrome, panicking that oh if I buy THAT pair of jeans, I'm not sure what trainers it will go with? Hmm, maybe I need to get some new trainers, but what be something to go with the other stuff I have? Oh and I keep buying stuff off asos, I should probably try to diversify, don't want to be the kind of person who just buys everything from the same shop. Then there's about 8 blogs about independent clothing websites open, a cursory 4 hour check of ebay listings etc etc.

    Inevitably this mania ends with me getting incredible agitated and just closing down the laptop without buying anything, or worse panic buying about £100 worth of stuff that I end up hating, and I'm still wearing the same tatty clothes I've had for years.

    It's not just for clothes, it can be anything. Realised I hadn't gotten into much new music recently and it ended up with me doing some sort of insane data analysis of about 50 BEST ALBUMS OF X/ALL TIME lists, then getting pissed off and listening to The Colour of Spring by Talk Talk 8 times in a row instead. Great album, tbf.

    It sorta links in with all my substance abuse issues, in the sense that deep down I've always been drawn towards getting pissed/fucked up as a way to make these intrusive thought processes fuck off basically, yet obviously the aftermath is that I'm ill, rundown and miserable which makes the symptoms much worse.

    I'm about a week off the piss, and two weeks without putting any shit up my nose (aside from accidental spillage from scuba diving, natch), which is a start, but I must admit I'm feeling pretty...fragile.


    The only plan I've got is to basically force myself to stay sober for a good couple of months, and see how mental I am then. As such I'll be able to roughly separate what issues are directly caused by my dreadful lifestyle choices from stuff that's just there. Then get proper professional help (counselling probably, maybe see a GP if I think some sort of legal chemical intervention might help) to attempt to sort it out.

    Anyone suffer from anything similar, and have any advice on how to feel less shit?

  36. #586
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    The clothes thing, just buy em in an actual shop. I donít understand people who do clothes shopping online, youíll never be satisfied unless you try them on before you buy them.

    The album thing, I (used to) do basically the same thing, and I think itís because weíre both mildly autistic.

    Youíre fine

  37. #587
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Yeah grow up lad.

  38. #588
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Is everything a mental health issue these days? You're struggling to pick a t-shirt, lad.

  39. #589
    Senior Member igor_balis's Avatar
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    Blow me

  40. #590
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I bought a job lot of 25 cheap t-shirts online for about 48 quid a few weeks ago. Never have to worry about upper half clothing again.

  41. #591
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    Checking your oven five times before leaving is a compulsion. Researching everything in minutiae for hours on end with no productivity attached to do it would be an example of obsessing.

    But an OCD diagnosis requires it to actively intrude upon your life and/or impede your function on a day-to-day basis.

    Intrusive thoughts are irrational, distressful, and can't be shaked.

    For two examples, I take medication so that I don't have
    to:
    1) wonder every five to ten minutes if I actually love the woman who is now my wife; and
    2) have a vivid image of me violently squashing my dog's skull with my foot flash through my mind whenever I walk by.

    Anxiety and stress both tend to exacerbate symptoms. I imagine the former is what is driving that obsessive behaviour you're showing.

  42. #592
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I bought a job lot of 25 cheap t-shirts online for about 48 quid a few weeks ago. Never have to worry about upper half clothing again.


    Where from?
    I'm a twit

  43. #593
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Some wholesale site. I won't say they're the highest quality, but I can always do it all again next year and who cares what clothes men wear anyway?

  44. #594
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    Some wholesale site. I won't say they're the highest quality, but I can always do it all again next year and who cares what clothes men wear anyway?
    Everyone innit

  45. #595
    Administrator John's Avatar
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    One of my closest childhood friends died yesterday morning, having taken a load of valium and gabapentin. When his mum went into his phone to get some of his mate's numbers to let them know what had happened, she found a load of texts, written but not sent, basically saying goodbye to people and thanking them for help they'd given him over the years.

    I saw him on Saturday and again on Monday and wouldn't have guessed anything was wrong. It's fucked me right up.

  46. #596
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    it's most often exactly the case that no1 can see it coming because those that have their suicide already planned are calm and cheerful (their misery is coming to an end, and they know the end-date) it's very hard for those around the person, however, in the end, it's a personal choice.

  47. #597
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    @phonics ????

  48. #598
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    What a good bot.

  49. #599
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Insights.

  50. #600
    The Airport King Magic's Avatar
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    Fuck this, I'm going back to counselling. My anxiety is through the roof, I'm desperately lonely, I feel totally out of control of everything in my life. I am at 90% of my pressure bar constantly and it occasionally spills over. More often than I'd like. I'm struggling to sleep without waking 40 times a night as well.

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