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View Poll Results: What will Christian Horner whinge about the most?

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  • Something French

    1 14.29%
  • Someone French

    0 0%
  • Robert Kubica's weird hairline

    1 14.29%
  • Martin Brundle's tiny legs

    0 0%
  • His awful wife

    1 14.29%
  • Being asked a question

    4 57.14%
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Thread: Formula 1 2018 - No Women Edition

  1. #1
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Formula 1 2018 - No Women Edition



    Grid Penalties: The Sport returns to our screens next month, here's all the shit you have to memorise to enjoy it correctly. But who will win, and how will Ferrari hand it to them?


    Teams & Drivers:

    Mercedes (Mercedes)
    - Lewis Hamilton (c)
    - Valtteri Bottas

    Ferrari (Ferrari)
    - Sebastian Vettel
    - Kimi Raikkonen

    Red Bull (Renault)
    - Daniel Ricciardo
    - Max Verstappen

    Force India (Mercedes)
    - Sergio Perez
    - Esteban Ocon

    Williams (Mercedes)
    - Lance Stroll
    - Sergey Sirotkin

    Renault (Renault)
    - Nico Hulkenberg
    - Carlos Sainz

    Toro Rosso (Honda)
    - Pierre Gasly
    - Brendon Hartley

    Haas (Ferrari)
    - Romain Grosjean
    - Kevin Magnussen

    McLaren (Renault)
    - Fernando Alonso
    - Stoffel Vandoorne

    Sauber (Ferrari)
    - Marcus Ericsson
    Charles Leclerc


    Race Schedule:

    25 March - Melbourne, Australia
    8 April - Sakhir, Bahrain
    15 April - Shanghai, China
    29 April - Baku, Azerbaijan
    13 May - Barcelona, Spain
    27 May - Monaco, Monaco
    10 June - Montreal, Canada
    24 June - Le Castellet, France
    1 July - Spielberg, Austria
    8 July - Silverstone, Great Britain
    22 July - Hockenheim, Germany
    29 July - Budapest, Hungary
    26 August - Spa-Francorchamps, Belgium
    2 September - Monza, Italy
    16 September - Singapore, Singapore
    30 September - Sochi, Russia
    7 October - Suzuka, Japan
    21 October - Austin, USA
    28 October - Mexico City, Mexico
    11 November - Sao Paulo, Brazil
    25 November - Yas Marina, Abu Dhabi


    Liveries:

    Mercedes
    Toggle Spoiler


    Ferrari
    Toggle Spoiler


    Red Bull
    Toggle Spoiler


    Force India
    Toggle Spoiler


    Williams
    Toggle Spoiler


    Renault
    Toggle Spoiler


    Toro Rosso
    Toggle Spoiler


    Haas
    Toggle Spoiler


    McLaren
    Toggle Spoiler


    Sauber
    Toggle Spoiler
    Last edited by Disco; 24-03-2018 at 01:59 PM.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Nice job, but your pictures don't work.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Yes they do.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    I'm getting grey rectangles for all except Mansell. Might be an ISP thing blocking the site from my end.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Three engines, unlucky Red Bull.

    Predictions:
    Hamilton easy title (maybe his last, he'll ceebs it in the end)
    Ocon to smash 'Checo' and get the Merc drive
    Alonso to come implausibly high in the championship (let's say 5th) and win Le Mans
    Williams to waste a probably decent car with shit drivers
    Leclerc to bodybag Ericsson
    Kimi to have a mare and get dropped for Luca Badoer

  6. #6
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    What happens after the 3 engines? Public flogging and disqualification?

  7. #7
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    No no, a blanket of grey rectangles is what you should (and will) be seeing.

  8. #8
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Don't forget the 1PM races now start at 2PM.
    I'm a twit

  9. #9
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Then they're not the 1PM races.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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  11. #11
    I used to be funny.
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    McLaren Renault sounds like a match made in an unlicensed videogame.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    As long as it's not as shit as McLaren Peugeot from 1994 they'll be alright.

  13. #13
    Senior Member Pleb's Avatar
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    What's up with the 2pm starts then?

  14. #14
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    You have to love that photo selection.


  15. #15
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Is this the moment when sportscars finally realises that it is a boring load of old toss? Only time will tell.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    They're the ultimate proof that motorsport needs to be relevant for manufacturers (ie shut about quiet engines you dickheads) because nobody is doing WEC for the publicity or viewing figures.

  17. #17
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    The Toyotas blowing up at Le Mans again would be the lollest thing in motorsport since... Blank. Probably when they got busted with that cheat turbo in rally.

  18. #18
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    It would be better if they binned off the prototypes and made some sort of super GT formula. I'm amazed even Toyota are fussed about running LMP1s.

  19. #19
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Isn't that basically touring cars?

  20. #20
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I mean more like the things that tool around in the 3rd highest class at Le Mans.

  21. #21
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    The baffle paint job.


  22. #22
    Senior Member Gray Fox's Avatar
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    I'm glad they've done that. There was far too much colour on the previous one.

  23. #23
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It's not the real livery, it's designed to stop other teams copying parts of the design.

  24. #24
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    It should be the real one.

  25. #25
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Cars with scramble paint jobs tend to be absolute dogs, I find.

  26. #26
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The Sauber-Alfa looks nice, which I suppose was inevitable.

  27. #27
    I used to be funny.
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    It almost looks like a Super Agurri which is all I can hope for.

  28. #28
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    McLaren are progressing in their quest to become Minardi by the looks of their new car.

    Opening post is updated with pics of the released cars.

  29. #29
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Wtf is that McLaren?

  30. #30
    Senior Member Gray Fox's Avatar
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    It looks a different colour in every picture I see.

    They at least have to be commended for not doing the boring white/black/silver crap the rest of the field seem to have done.

  31. #31
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    I'm pleased that the numbers (and I think there will be names/initials too) are more prominent this year, but equally displeased with all the shit everyone seems to be dumping onto the sidepods. Reminds me of this horrible thing:


  32. #32
    Senior Member Pleb's Avatar
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    Is this the nineties again?

  33. #33
    Senior Member Serj's Avatar
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    I like the new McLaren. I'd probably have preferred a slightly darker hue of orange, but it's still one of the better liveries of the last couple of years.




  34. #34
    Senior Member dino's Avatar
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    God the 'halo' is awful. There won't ever be an attractive F1 car again if they stick about.

  35. #35
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It doesn't look great but I struggle to muster much of an argument against them on looks alone.

  36. #36
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    I didn't even notice it on that car til it was mentioned. It's fine.

  37. #37
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    It doesn't look like it could stand up to the sort of impacts that you might want protection there for, such as slamming into the bottom of a tractor at eighty miles an hour, so what is the case for it?

  38. #38
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    I didn't even notice it on that car til it was mentioned. It's fine.
    For something which should be so obvious it's amazing how many pictures I look at and don't even notice it.

  39. #39
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    It doesn't look like it could stand up to the sort of impacts that you might want protection there for, such as slamming into the bottom of a tractor at eighty miles an hour, so what is the case for it?
    Things like what happened Massa I presume.

  40. #40
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Was that the spring? A partial windscreen would make more sense for that sort of thing.

  41. #41
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    It's a bit odd, it seems to be a protection against problems in other formula. Henry Surtees (wheel) and Justin Wilson (discarded big mac presumably) were both killed by being lumped in the head by something. But you're not wrong, it wouldn't have helped Massa or Senna or any of the other people (mainly marshalls) who've been hit by stuff recently.

  42. #42
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I like those little scales on the McLaren. I bet they provide all sorts of MARGINAL GAINS to be rendered irrelevant by shite internals.

  43. #43
    I used to be funny.
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    BBC seemed to make a big deal out the car being orange. Ignoring the fact it was orange last year.

  44. #44
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    If the Renault goes then I'd expect podiums for McLaren. There's no intrinsic reason, Adrian Newey aside, why they should have a worse package than the Red Bull.

  45. #45
    Senior Member Giggles's Avatar
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    Podiums is severely pushing it.

  46. #46
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    If the Renault goes then I'd expect podiums for McLaren. There's no intrinsic reason, Adrian Newey aside, why they should have a worse package than the Red Bull.
    The thought of Alonso stuffing it up some Red Bulls is

    How times change.

  47. #47
    The Airport King Magic's Avatar
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    WSBK Philip Island in the AM on Sat.

  48. #48
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco View Post
    The thought of Alonso stuffing it up some Red Bulls is

    How times change.
    He is such a great driver that if he can qualify it even top 8 regularly he will surely troll his way to podiums.

  49. #49
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    They should just go for a cockpit and be done with it.

  50. #50
    The Airport King Magic's Avatar
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