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View Poll Results: Who will receive your vote?

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  • Theresa May's Conservatives

    10 22.73%
  • Jeremy Corbyn's Labour

    23 52.27%
  • Tim Farron's Liberal Democrats

    3 6.82%
  • Paul Nuttall's UKIP

    0 0%
  • 2 people's Greens

    1 2.27%
  • Nicholas Durgeon's Scottish Nationalists

    1 2.27%
  • Satan's Sinn Fein

    0 0%
  • Dr Ian Paisley's DUP

    0 0%
  • Some other bunch of nonces

    2 4.55%
  • I'm foreign, but I wish I were an Englishman

    4 9.09%
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Thread: UK General Election 2017 - 8 June

  1. #7251
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    If they didn't blame Trump/Putin/Bannon/Cummings/racism/white people/old people/the fact that we had a referendum called in the first place/David Cameron/the biased BBC/Rupert Murdoch/the uneducated/those from an inferior gene pool/Cambridge Analytica/Jacob Rees-Mogg's stock options/George Soros/Thatcher, then they might just have to blame themselves, and that just wouldn't do.
    I mean I'm not sure why you should blame any of that on them considering they also have absolutely no power as seen by the last two years.

  2. #7252
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Byron View Post
    Because two leaders works out well for the Greens.

    All Labour need to do is ensure they don't have a terrorist supporting cunt in charge.
    Why do only Labour need to change on that front?

  3. #7253
    I used to be funny.
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    Diane Abbott, Labour Leader. Think on that.

  4. #7254
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Keith Vaz is off as well. It's a proper clear out of the twats.

  5. #7255
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Gone but not forgotten.

    I can now spend the next thirty years focusing all my hate on Laura Pidcock.

  6. #7256
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    I'm staggered he'd managed to hang around for this long after what he was caught doing.

  7. #7257
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    We're back on the 'Corbyn refuses to start a thermonuclear war THE PUSSY' storyline?

  8. #7258
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    It is an odd one. Firstly because we have never used a nuke in anger, secondly because most of them would bottle ever actually using them and thirdly because he should just say he would if he had to. it really is a tedious line of questioning.

  9. #7259
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    We retain the option to inflict low-level twattings on loser countries so it wouldn't necessarily start a nuclear war if we moved first.

  10. #7260
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Lol

  11. #7261
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Careful what you say or Switzerland goes boom.

  12. #7262
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Getting in a huff and nuking the one country that actually has tactical nuke preparation would be a good summary of the Conservative strategy over the last decade.

  13. #7263
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    In some breaking news, Farage has said the Brexit Party won't stand in seats won by the Tories in 2017.

    Has he given up?

  14. #7264
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    That will make no difference to anything. It's the Labour-held leave marginals where they need to fuck off.

  15. #7265
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    It's the best news the Lib Dems have had in years.

  16. #7266
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    They wouldn't bomb Switzerland, that's where their money is.

  17. #7267
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Switzerland is not a tough opponent. As per the opening sequence of Tomorrow Never Dies we have strong ski-warfare capabilities, and for more general mountainous combat we have good experience from the First Afghan War. The nuclear weapons are just the icing on the cake. Plus the best bit is Switzerland is neutral, so its troops wouldn't be able to fight back.

  18. #7268
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    They wouldn't bomb Switzerland, that's where their money is.
    Nah, English stuff is all done through Caymans/Barbados.

  19. #7269
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    That's what they want you to think.

  20. #7270
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    In before phonics is actually a Swiss banker.

  21. #7271
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    In before phonics is actually a Swiss banker.
    Nah, I just live with them. The cunts.

  22. #7272
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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  23. #7273
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Such bants.

  24. #7274
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    They must have drafted dela and ginner in for the big offensive.

  25. #7275
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Some Lib Dem has resigned for his liberal use of the n word on Twitter. Elections are miserable but I do enjoy these stories.

  26. #7276
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I walked past a house near here the other day. Large, detached, a child's tricycle on the porch, a 4x4 parked outside and a Lib Dems Winning Here diamond on the front garden wall. My first thought was to whether the man of the house is into scatology or rentboys.

  27. #7277
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Huge respect for the tactical Asian. Get him a safe seat.

  28. #7278
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Oh God, this is shit, where the fuck is Ram... RAMESH? YEAH? RAMESH? CAN YOU WALK DOWN THAT CORRIDOR PLEASE? NO, NOW, IT HAS TO BE NOW... YES, I KNOW, JUST DO IT, IT'S A FAVOUR

  29. #7279
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Meanwhile...

  30. #7280
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    It looks like an intervention.

  31. #7281
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post


    Huge respect for the tactical Asian. Get him a safe seat.
    Is that real? I seen it this morning and thought it was one of those bad lip reading parody things.

  32. #7282
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    It's quite funny the amount of seething that is happening on Prominent Remain Twitter about Lib Dems and Labour's failure to stand aside for one another.

    1. You do know that Labour don't really want to remain?
    2. Are you sure you want to turn this into a second referendum by proxy? What happens if you lose?

  33. #7283
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    I don't bet on politics much and was wondering what's the best place to bet on it? I think the Tories could well get a 30 - 50 seat majority this time around.

  34. #7284
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    Politicians really need to stop using the law for ridiculous things.

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotla...itics-50410790

  35. #7285
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Imagine taking someone to court for not letting you on the telly. Get a grip love.

  36. #7286
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    According to the last election just two years ago, it's more a two party state than ever before. Add in the fact that they are only standing in 59 of the 650 constituencies and their irrelevance should be well-established. The Greens and Brexit Party have better claims.

  37. #7287
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    I can kinda see Jo Swinson's angle because they at least had a spot at it in 2010. Still, she'd just be there for the illusion of choice rather than an actual option.

  38. #7288
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Having studied everything very carefully I've just placed my first election bet. Medium-sized wedge on NOM at 2.8 on Betfair. Mainly a trading position but if we see what I expect to happen and the entire north and midlands are repelled by Boris Johnson, then I might leave it in there.

    Lab maj is basically impossible but is available at 32, for the true believers.

  39. #7289
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Can we, whoever wins, agree that the PM should become a mostly ceremonial decision and their job is to go to various places they're widely unliked and get called an arsehole for months on end?

    I've really enjoyed Boris walking around in wellies being called a twat.

  40. #7290
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    I hate that any Labour policy is called 'Free Stuff' while exactly the same Tory policy will be hailed as small c Conservatism a la



    but this is just absolute bollocks and a bare faced lie.


  41. #7291
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    He literally says 'Free broadband for the country' at the start.

    I don't get it, does this mean I won't have to pay £34.95 to Sky anymore, or does it just mean that they'll put fibreoptic down in shitholes?

  42. #7292
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    This Brexit twerp on QT is appalling.

  43. #7293
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    He literally says 'Free broadband for the country' at the start.

    I don't get it, does this mean I won't have to pay £34.95 to Sky anymore, or does it just mean that they'll put fibreoptic down in shitholes?
    Technically all the fibreoptic/copper-wire etc. that was laid down for your connection was already paid for by the state just like it was done under (actual) British Telecom, they just contracted out the installation. It's a better case for nationalisation than the trains.

    England is only 30,000km bigger than South Korea where 95% of the entire country had 3mb connections in 1999. Today a 1GB per second connection costs less than 20 quid.

    The West failed because we became absolutely useless at infrastructure for absolutely no gain.

  44. #7294
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    The nationalised telecoms were a joke, and this idea of universal mega broadband is stupid. As far as I'm aware nobody has asked these idiots what they think the state shouldn't provide/balls up, which somebody really should before we end up with all the wacky shit in their 1950 manifesto.

  45. #7295
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    The nationalised telecoms were a joke.
    Can i ask what this means? Like, I had a landline in that era that I can never remember ever not working and there wasn't any other technology. What was the issue?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    As far as I'm aware nobody has asked these idiots what they think the state shouldn't provide/balls up, which somebody really should before we end up with all the wacky shit in their 1950 manifesto.
    You didn't ask but imo it's:

    utilities (electric,gas,water)
    national and local transport
    some form of public banking system (i.e. through the post office)
    speaking of post office, that
    and internet technically counts as necessary communication nowadays so that too.

  46. #7296
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    It's basically the other side of the coin from Trump and his wall in terms of batshit politicians making ludicrous promises.

    This has distracted from the real lol of the day which is loads of Remainers and Corbynistas piling onto twitter, pleading with Lord Buckethead to withdraw his candidacy in Uxbridge as they fear he will split the anti-Johnson vote.

  47. #7297
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    This has distracted from the real lol of the day which is loads of Remainers and Corbynistas piling onto twitter, pleading with Lord Buckethead to withdraw his candidacy in Uxbridge as they fear he will split the anti-Johnson vote.
    Sadly I have to correct you. Because we live in a distopian nightmare world, they are pleading with Count Binface because the Monster Raving etc. party filed a copyright injunction against the candidate formerly known as Lord Buckethead.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    It's basically the other side of the coin from Trump and his wall in terms of batshit politicians making ludicrous promises.
    Apart from it being far cheaper and much more useful, it's exactly the same I agree.

  48. #7298
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    British Telecom (or Post Office Telecommunications) - like every other nationalised industry, including previous attempts at the ones you mention - was notoriously inefficient and unresponsive. They used to take weeks to install phone lines, despite, as you say, there being nothing else for them to actually do. We've had thirty years of this stuff getting better and cheaper year after year. What the absolute fuck do they think that they have to offer?

  49. #7299
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    British Telecom (or Post Office Telecommunications) - like every other nationalised industry, including previous attempts at the ones you mention - was notoriously inefficient and unresponsive. They used to take weeks to install phone lines, despite, as you say, there being nothing else for them to actually do. We've had thirty years of this stuff getting better and cheaper year after year. What the absolute fuck do they think that they have to offer?
    Have you tried to get a phoneline installed recently? It takes the same amount of time and you pay for the privilege.

    Of course it gets cheaper year after year. They're not fucking doing anything that costs any money and anything they do is being paid for by the fucking government.

  50. #7300
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Cheaper than the wall but did you see the way he just dropped a casual £15 billion of extra spending in there without batting an eyelid? Even if you subscribe to their theory of unlimited borrowing funding everything, that holds that every single such 'investment' they are going to make is going to be a success and pay for itself in spades, which if you look over the history of governments worldwide spending money is not a particularly likely scenario.

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