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Thread: The little things in life that fuck you off

  1. #2551
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Custard with some chopped banana chucked into it is

  2. #2552
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    Quote Originally Posted by SincereTheRebel View Post
    The custard powder that comes in the tin. Just add milk it says. There has to be a another missing ingredient like nivea cream to smooth out the bumps

  3. #2553
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Got some spring rolls today from my local Chinese, they're usually pretty good. Today they were filled with nothing but beansprouts.

    Fucking charlatans.

  4. #2554
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Custard is for nonces.

  5. #2555
    I used to be funny.
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    This cat's going to die on my watch.

    Put some food down for him and he just can't be fucked with it.

  6. #2556
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Have it put down if it's that bad, just letting it fall to bits is horrible.

  7. #2557
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    I disagree. Man are always quick to 'put down animal'. Let him go, in his own time.

  8. #2558
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    In the wild it would have been eaten by now. You should do this to teach it a lesson not to be such a pussy.

  9. #2559
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    'In its own time' might involve weeks of agony, which is rather irresponsible don't you think?

  10. #2560
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Just tell it to man up.

  11. #2561
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    Maybe take it to the fucking vet?

  12. #2562
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    I get back sweat when driving in hot weather but my shirts cover it up well.

    Today I wore something that I recently bought and have just taken it off. It looks like Lee Evans has raped my shirt, it's fucking drenched.

  13. #2563
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Don't you have air conditioning in your car?

  14. #2564
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    It'll be all that revolting pube like back hair you fat fuck.

  15. #2565
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Don't you have air conditioning in your car?
    I do but it doesn't help.

  16. #2566
    I used to be funny.
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    Maybe take it to the fucking vet?
    My folks already did that last weeks. Found a stomach tumor and they're treating it with steroids. He's eating, though. Thank fuck.

  17. #2567
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    My folks already did that last weeks. Found a stomach tumor and they're treating it with steroids. He's eating, though. Thank fuck.
    Whoops, sorry bub.

  18. #2568
    Administrator SvN's Avatar
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    My 38 year old sister, who has lived in Wales for about 4 years, has posted a photo of her wearing Wales facepaint in preparation for the match tonight. He statuses throughout the competition have been a bit eye roll inducing, but this takes the biscuit.

  19. #2569
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    .....

  20. #2570
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Gesundheit.

  21. #2571
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Water sprinklers on when it's raining.

  22. #2572
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    Oh God that drives me crazy.

  23. #2573
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    i share an office space with the registration department here at the hospital

    this girl has now moved onto sending voice messages back and forth to her flavor of the month because he's "driving" and it's not safe to text and drive

    so now, instead of just having to listen to this Babysitter's Club fuckery all day, now I get the live audio supplement experience!

    fuck am I so lucky.

  24. #2574
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    Join her in behaving like a fifteen year old and start shouting 'what are you doing? come back to bed' in the background of all her messages.

  25. #2575
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    i share an office space with the registration department here at the hospital

    this girl has now moved onto sending voice messages back and forth to her flavor of the month because he's "driving" and it's not safe to text and drive

    so now, instead of just having to listen to this Babysitter's Club fuckery all day, now I get the live audio supplement experience!

    fuck am I so lucky.
    You should 100% say something, that is absolutely not okay to do.

  26. #2576
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    Considered it but then she'd just re-record said message and I'd have to listen to her mushy gushy nonsense again and again.

    It's bad enough she's recording, listening to herself, then sending. Receiving, sharing with other girl in office, and replying.

    I have to take half the day to cover at another facility later on. About a 60 mile drive, normally I'd be massively regretting the idea but I cherish the opportunity for the silent solitude of the road for once this afternoon I can tell you that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mert View Post
    You should 100% say something, that is absolutely not okay to do.
    Oh it's absolute madness. Mind you, this is the culmination of a relationship that started over texts while Boyfriend was in The Army. They finally met in person two weeks ago and are s0o0o0o0o0o0o in love.

    It's utterly sickening and cringeworthy. Especially considering I've listened to these girls talk about this and I generally get the sense that she just wants to tie him down because of his Army pension/benefits and long-term stability rather than actually being so0o0o0o0o in love.

    And I mean I'm happy for people being happy but the fact that she honestly thinks anyone and everyone wants to hear this shit is absurd to me.

  27. #2577
    I used to be funny.
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    I don't like people who take two or three personal calls a day during work. Especially when all of the usually end with the phrase, "I'll talk to you later."

  28. #2578
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    You deserve it for 'so0o0o0o0o', Bruh.

    You deserve more than an irritating coworker for that, actually, but it'll do for now.

  29. #2579
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Some dickhead neighbour is out in his garden with shitty dance music blasting out on his speakers. It's right outside my bedroom window. It's actually giving me a headache.

  30. #2580
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    I was reminded why I don't like attempting to trim my beard. Sadly it came after I finished trimming it.

    It's probably the best job I've done and it's got a much better shape but I've lost parts that I didn't want to lose. Greatest loss is the length from my chin, I went in a little close and I lost far too fucking much (2-3 inches I'd imagine). Can't even do a proper beard stroke with it.

  31. #2581
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Cunts standing too close behind you when queueing. Had some bitch this morning near in my back pocket until I walked back onto her foot.

  32. #2582
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Is that where you been all this time?

  33. #2583
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco View Post
    Is that where you been all this time?
    Spar?

  34. #2584
    mischamischaracterisation Dquincy's Avatar
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    Welcome back @Giggles

    You've been missed.

  35. #2585
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dquincy View Post
    Welcome back @Giggles

    You've been missed.
    I'd doubt that.

    Still 2nd highest poster after Magic too. What a shambles

  36. #2586
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I think I'd have to go missing for a few years to lose my spot. Still, quantity and quality unlike How on the old board.

  37. #2587
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    Quote Originally Posted by John View Post
    You deserve it for 'so0o0o0o0o', Bruh.

    You deserve more than an irritating coworker for that, actually, but it'll do for now.
    Fair, by the way.

  38. #2588
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    This is proper first world problems stuff but this hotel has far too many staff. I think the idea is that you never have to do anything yourself and it's a service but I just thanked three people for pressing the elevator button for me.

  39. #2589
    I used to be funny.
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    Because you're on your phone playing Pokemon Go or something? Pokemon Go, Fuck that. This is already swamping my facebook and twitter feeds.

  40. #2590
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    Because you're on your phone playing Pokemon Go or something? Pokemon Go, Fuck that. This is already swamping my facebook and twitter feeds.
    http://www.idigitaltimes.com/pokemon...nternet-545577

  41. #2591
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Pokemon Go is amazing you mong.

    Everyone will be playing soon.

  42. #2592
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mahow View Post
    Pokemon Go is amazing you mong.

    Everyone will be playing soon.
    It's for fucking mongs. Hopefully most of them walk off a cliff or into a lake playing it. Natural selection.

  43. #2593
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    The real beasts still refuse to walk.

    Level 12 for me

  44. #2594
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    Because you're on your phone playing Pokemon Go or something? Pokemon Go, Fuck that. This is already swamping my facebook and twitter feeds.
    Me?

    No, one sees you coming round the corner who tells someone else to press the button and then there's someone in the elevator to press your floor number for you.

  45. #2595
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    Me?

    No, one sees you coming round the corner who tells someone else to press the button and then there's someone in the elevator to press your floor number for you.
    I take it they're all expecting tipped too.

  46. #2596
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    No thank god, although I did get stuck for 100 rand by this 'porter' at the airport who grabbed me and said 'Where you go? D3? I take you' and proceeded to take me to Terminal B and then told me D was 'over there'.

    I went for 50 and he said 'no give me 100' and given that he's definitely not being paid by the airport and it's pennies difference I just gave it to him.

    I keep giving ridiculous tips because I don't have small bills though. You're apparently supposed to give the guy who carries your bags up 10 rand. I gave him 50 as I didn't have anything smaller.

  47. #2597
    I used to be funny.
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    You're a terrifying contradiction with your accidental high-roller escapades and tiny bank account.

  48. #2598
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shindig View Post
    You're a terrifying contradiction with your accidental high-roller escapades and tiny bank account.
    Per diem. Gotta use it or I don't get it. Not my fault the system sucks. But yeah, I'm fucking awful with money and stuff like this goes a long way to explaining why I'm broke all the time..

  49. #2599
    I used to be funny.
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    I'm also going to put this up in advance: Tonight me and a few work colleagues are going to a comedy night in town. The person whose idea it was has the worst laugh in human existence. It might just do me in.


  50. #2600
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    It's her birthday on Sunday and literally nothing has turned up yet.
    I'm a twit

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