Benny is a spastic, I agree.Originally Posted by Yevrah
Benny is a spastic, I agree.
+1
I meant borked there,.
Door-to-door salespeople. Are they thick? I realise it's their job but since when did becoming a fucking cunt help a sale?
"Is there any scope for you to get your roof renewed sir?"
*thinks brilliant, can fuck him off ASAP*
" (smugly) Well yes, it's just been done literally 2 months ago so..."
"Ah brilliant sir, we offer coating on new roofs"
*FUCKING HELL LOL, got me there*
"Ok, I'm not really interested I've spent enough money"
"Are you in tomorrow?"
"What? No I'm out"
"In at all this week?"
"No I've got appointments, look I'm not really interested"
"What about the weekends?"
"I don't want to spend any more money"
"The quotation is free though!"
"...yeah I'm really not interested, I'll keep the booklet to read if it humours you"
"Nah, I need it back"
"Oh...lol"
*shuts door slowly*
I thought there was one more KitKat left in the fridge.
I hate cunts trying to be nice on the road. If it's your right of way and I clearly haven't been waiting ages to turn out then don't let me out and think I'm expecting you to do so, then get the arse when I don't fuck off straightaway. Follow the rules you fucking cunts.
Especially don't be nice less than a couple of minutes afterwards by stopping in front of me on the main road to let four (fucking four!) lorries out of the Tesco warehouse which can then only get over the controlled roundabout a mile down the road one at a time. Bastards.
Some cunt in front of me turning right today decided to let a tractor out from the right in front of me
And I don't even think he knew why I was roaring at him out the window as he turned as he just thought he was the soundest fucker in the world for his good deed.
One week after informing me my electricity for my 1 bedroom flat is £10 a month, they now decide it's £244. Fuck npower.
Websites that have something between the username and password boxes on the login bit so you can't just tab from the username box to the password box. Ended up on the forgotten username page because I wasn't looking.
I had this with them last month, they recalculated my bill to be over double what it normally is, took my money, then the next month recalculated again back down to what it had been for months and have just kept my account in credit.
So they just fucking stole my money out of my bank account to sit in their account instead.
Energy companies are totally incompetent.
What's the deal with hankies? My mum's partner uses one and I've never really understood blowing a load of snot into a bit of cloth to then put in your pocket.
Arseholes that fuck about in the outside lane, then have the nerve to flash or gesture as you drive past. The only way to get these cunts to move is to almost rear end them out of the way. Love sticking my middle finger up as I soar past.
As a former door-to-door salesman for nPower, this is exactly what we were instructed to do and would get a 20% commission for doing so. I refused to turn up after the first day where a single mother with 2 kids just got screwed into signing something she had little clue about long term. (at the time the offer was for 3 months but I can imagine they've moved down to get more sales. It was an absolute race to the bottom with British Gas and friends pulling the same shit) Utilities in the UK are so, so bent.
I'm never entirely sure what people mean by inside and outside lanes.
Inside is left outside is right.
My journey to work is plagued by people who seem to think it's perfectly acceptable to wander about in the road.
To me it seems like it should be the other way around since the right has the other direction next to it so it's really at the centre of the road and therefore on the inside.
I used to think that when I was a woman.
It's not. Though this reinforces my point that most outside lane hogs probably don't even realise they are wrong.
I don't hog it. I know I'm meant to stay in the left and use the right one for overtaking. I just don't know which one is labelled inside and which one is outside.
Worst part is being made to look like an "outside lane hog." Like if you do 80 to get past someone doing 65 but don't wanna take the piss and fly by, then some bellend comes up your arse trying to get past and as soon as you go back into the middle lane s/he rips past you.
When that happens I make a point of singing along to the radio to show I JUST DON'T GIVE A FUCK.
I'm a twit
No I mean the cretins that do 61 overtaking a lorry.
Didn't mean you specifically. Just that a lot of times people think other drivers are being pricks on the motorway, a lot of them don't actually know any better. The quantity and standard of lessons and testing for motorway driving here and in the UK is horrendous.
Commision-driven sales environments are terrifying Thatcherite nightmares. I mean, its cool you have an office and that but it's really just four walls and a bell. A space you utilise for 10 minutes a day to do a huddle and then fuck off to today's patch. 8 hours door-to-door bothering for 2-3 of them to pity you.
My mother is a laughably nervous passenger, so when it rains a bit I like to fly down the outside lane pretending I can't see properly.
Inner city duals or bypasses are the worst. Oh, you're turning right in 5 miles? Cool, just you go in the outside lane now and do 40. Cunt.
Calling them inside and outside lanes when you can just call them left and right is a bit dumb isn't it?
No. Inside, middle, outside.
What is stupid is nearside and offside in terms of describing the left/right side of a car.
Yes. Very.
Inside and outside could still be swapped around there. It doesn't make any sense.
No they can't. The inside lane is the default.
Reminds me of a friend who would use up and down instead of left and right. It made zero fucking sense. His parents caught him smoking weed and also found out that he would ask the maid to jack him off. He blamed it all on us so he was banned from hanging out with us, the prick.
Did the maid oblige?
Left, middle, right. You're correct, there is no way that would work.
She did.
Was she fit?
They couldn't be though. Anyone who does is simply wrong.
I've seen (and played) World's Wildest Police Chases. Don't tell me about lane discipline you cunt.
That's fucked up, am I right or left?
Yeah, they would be wrong if they did it on their own now against the convention of what they are. But the convention is arbitrary. Unlike left and right which has a meaning outside the context of roads.
Inside/outside is used because you could drive to another country who drive on the opposite lane.
You're still using the outside lane to overtake.
Fuck no, she was an old midget.
But how often does that actually happen? Balls to other countries.
Try telling a mechanic or tyre fitter you're left tyre needs replacing. They'll use that as the butt of their homophobia for weeks.
Outside.
Indeed. It holds weight even if you're driving on the upside or downside.
See in that scenario, 'inside' should mean on the driver's side. That's where I'd be sitting in the car so inside should be closer to me.
It's inside, middle and outside in comparison to the lane opposite you rather than the wheel of the car, no? That doesn't change wherever you're driving.
Does your car only have two tires?
But we don't use inside/outside in that context, it's nearside/offside.
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