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Thread: News of the day

  1. #8751
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yevrah View Post
    We do really need an eccentric multi billionaire. The current crop are all so dull.
    I’d happily take that gig.
    I'm a twit

  2. #8752
    I used to be funny.
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    "St. Helens amazon-affiliate magnate to fund Garden Soccer Super League."

  3. #8753
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    'Haydock man builds personal covid test station.'

  4. #8754
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    This is either the sneakiest anti-tramp measure ever or an Irish joke brought to life.

  5. #8755
    I used to be funny.
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    Someone should tell them wheelchairs come in all shapes and sizes.

  6. #8756
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Surely they can just park beside a normal bench
    I'm a twit

  7. #8757
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    It's anti homeless. 100%

  8. #8758
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Yeah, she's Fine Gael. It's deffo anti-homeless despite how much they love creating homeless people.

  9. #8759
    I used to be funny.
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    I can't remember the last time I saw any homeless person picking a park bench. It's always a shop entrance or somewhere with an overhang.

  10. #8760
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Top or Bottom

  11. #8761
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Bottom.

  12. #8762
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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  13. #8763
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    A West Midlands Trains spokesperson said: “We take cybersecurity very seriously. We run regular training and it’s important to test your resilience.

    “The design of the email was just the sort of thing a criminal organisation would use – and thankfully it was an exercise without the consequences of a real attack.
    Yeah, Putin is definitely hacking the 9.17 to Stourbridge.

  14. #8764
    I used to be funny.
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    "It says Kremlin on the front, mate."

  15. #8765
    Senior Member Alex's Avatar
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    They do that at our place. Never anything as cruel as that, but they once sent a fake email about the pension scheme with a dodgy looking link on it that you were supposed to be on the ball and report.

    The result has since been that whenever anything gets emailed legitimately about the pension scheme it's becomes this running joke to report it as a scam en-masse, to the extent where subsequent emails get sent out saying "please stop doing this", which then obviously also get reported as a scam.

  16. #8766
    I used to be funny.
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    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-57050690

    "Our goal is to make money and not creating problems for society," DarkSide wrote on its website.
    "My business is murder but I'm not out to hurt anyone."

  17. #8767
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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  18. #8768
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    That 4 year old has done well.

  19. #8769
    I used to be funny.
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    Might be time to consider David Hockney for next year's death pool.

  20. #8770
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    It's the dropped s that makes it truly shit.

  21. #8771
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    David Hockney has #MeToo Hall of Famer written all over him, but the art market might have to collapse first.

  22. #8772
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    All art is shit.

  23. #8773
    I used to be funny.
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    Big statues, though!

  24. #8774
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Eid Mubarak to one and all. The vids coming out are literally reliving Nazi Germany but with camera phones I reckon. Some absolute savagery going on. Might head down to London this weekend given the clubs are still shut to shout Allahuakbar a few times and piss on a holocaust memorial for some bants.

  25. #8775
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Me, Boydy, John and Jimmy should start a Barbershop Quartet.

  26. #8776
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Not sure whether to feel like the title of that list is a laughable typo or if maybe there just aren't any sexy British accents.

    Glaswegian isn't even the sexiest Scottish accent so God knows how it's on there as third and Essex is about as sexy as a DIY vasectomy.

  27. #8777
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    At this point I have no idea what my accent actually is.

  28. #8778
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    If this was a proper Tory government they'd have started clamping down on things like the Geordie accent by now. We shouldn't have to live on the same island as that load of made up rubbish.

  29. #8779
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    I could more easily believe that was a list of the top ten most grating accents.

  30. #8780
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    These surveys are always done on a best case scenario. Thick accents anywhere are brutal.

  31. #8781
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Third Akehurst brother popped up.


  32. #8782
    Isn't he banned? Baz's Avatar
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    Our Luke.
    I'm a twit

  33. #8783
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    that's incredible

  34. #8784
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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  35. #8785
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    That anti-Semitism convoy through wherever it was looked like a decent day out. Elsewhere, gutted for Jeremy Corbyn, the world's unluckiest anti-racism campaigner, giving his speech next to a fifteen foot inflatable with horns and a massive nose. Where do you get those from, and, assuming it wasn't made this week, who has one ready to go?

  36. #8786
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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  37. #8787
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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  38. #8788
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I wonder how much you'd have to sit speaking to your baby about their grandma for those to be the first words (which they obviously weren't.)

  39. #8789
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    We should start a poll to vote on what Pepe should try and get his newborn to say first.

  40. #8790
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I will accept the results of the poll.

  41. #8791
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    'B-B-B-B... Bui... Bui... Build the... W-W-W-W...'

  42. #8792
    I used to be funny.
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    Build's a shit first word. Narcos. Go with that.

  43. #8793
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch

  44. #8794
    The Artist Formerly Known as Taz
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    Lol at this Primrose Hill closure story. Glad to have played my part in the war against these priveleged cunts by taking their child's bike.

  45. #8795
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    I wonder how long it'll take little Archie to utter "Dodi Al Fayed."

  46. #8796
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    "Uncle" James Hewitt.

  47. #8797
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    "Aw, his first air quotes!"

  48. #8798
    Senior Member -james-'s Avatar
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    That cable car story is proper nightmare fuel.

  49. #8799
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    I went in a cable car once (well, twice including coming back down) and I won't be in a massive rush to do it again.

  50. #8800
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    We did the one across the Thames once and that was bad enough.

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