https://i.imgur.com/2FvDLwv.jpg
http://youtu.be/UcaMw4aCz4c
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Fantastic. I've been waiting for ages for someone to make a nude, invisible-baby fishing simulator with hovering space gods. Looking forward to this one!
It already sounds like overblown guff.
What a load of wank. I hate Sony, this game is barely out of pre-production. What's the point?
Hype.
The Last Guardian, though. That's a thing.
New trailer last night.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iadt58pIU7o
:cool2:
I'm not excited by this. Just very confused.
What a load of cock
But can you talk to the monsters?
Is "shit happening for the sake of it" a genre?
If you were looking to sum up Kojimas career in a single sentence that's how you'd do it.
There was a trailer for this on loop on the official Playstation Twitch channel. However it was covered in oily handprints so you couldn't see it properly. After x amount of time or viewers it removed the oil and played an extended trailer. I'll post it in here when it gets uploaded.
We also have a release date. November 8th 2019.
EDIT: It's started again. https://www.twitch.tv/playstation
Six months out. Good. I'd hate that to drag on into the next consoles. Still not sure I want to play it, though. The countryside just reminds me of Avalanche's last game, Generation Zero. Wide-open spaces with not a lot to do.
Kojima releasing a 9 minute long trailer featuring a character unironically introduced as DIE HARDMAN is pure Kojima. There's a guy who takes off a mask to reveal another mask. Genuinely impressive how much these actors look like they're actors though. It should be peak uncanny valley but it's not.
That song is perfect too.
All in for this
The actual game part looks average as fuck.
https://imgur.com/Cu9EtKX[imghttps://imgur.com/Cu9EtKX.gifhttps://imgur.com/Cu9EtKXhttps://imgur.com/Cu9EtKX
https://imgur.com/Cu9EtKX
I suppose after Metal Gear 5, a very good game bollocksed by Kojimaness, it makes sense to now have the actual games be a bit rubbish as well.
Logical conclusion and all that.
Watching Giant Bomb talk over the TGS stuff. This is not a game I want to play. It's a literal walking simulator where you manage weight, condition of packages, stamina, etc. And the social aspect makes it look like you're very reliant on other people. On top of that, the world is just empty.
And childcare.
I could scarcely be less interested. I'm largely turned off by Kojima stuff anyway and what I've seen of the game does nothing to dissuade me of that.
I was really enjoying MGS5 until Kojimaness started happening.
It just looks like a load of twaddle to appeal to perverts and games reviewers wearing fedoras.
You know Youtube just chucked up Zero Punctuation's Phantom Pain review at me there and it made me think that I really didn't do full justice to how annoyed I was when MGSV went all Kojima-y. I fucking love an open world and I fucking love stealth. After the worst start a video game has ever had, I think, I was genuinely starting to go "gosh is this going to be one of my favourite ever games?" as I was mooching about on my horse and scoping out bases before breaking mens necks with unusual ease so I could kit out a helicopter with Bonnie Tyler tunes or whatever.
And then all the bullshit started and I couldn't even bring myself to finish it.
But guys, YOU CAN MAKE YOUR REEDUS PISS ON THINGS.
He made Lindsay Wagner look young in it because that's the Lindsay Wagner he wants to fuck.
I'm intrigued (not enough to buy the game) to see if he can come up with something more bullshit than vocal chord parasites this time around.
This looks interesting, but im not sure if i should buy it or not. I still have played Red Dead for longer than 2 hours yet...
Reviews are through the roof but in a, "It plays like a shitbox but LOOK!" kinda way. IGN have been less kind.
https://youtu.be/ujcC1_Ur9RY
Not less kind than Edge, presumably.
I've read a few reviews that seem like they're trying to find ways not to say that it's a bit wank.
"But after fifteen hours it does start to hook you". Fifteen hours? Fuck off, I've given up by then.
Just glancing through the positive reviews and the majority come from the other IGN territories, print newspapers and indie websites. Gamespot and Destructoid dig it but their summary offers nothing.
Quote:
Death Stranding is not the overly-strange inaccessible walled garden the marketing campaign has made it out to be.
It looks absolutely batshit from what I've seen, and barely a "game". Seems like reviewers are mostly holding back against coming out and just saying it's totally bobbins because they want access to the next game from him.
Kojima has spent years ruining his otherwise good games with utter guff and rank misogyny, I'm lost as to why he's given the time of day anymore.
He needs a leash. He had one at Konami. Seemingly, he doesn't have one here. He's made a walking simulator with an emphasis on the simulating of walking. And meter management. And encumbrance. And vapid social media interaction. And celebrity cameos.
Someone needs to steal the Kojima Productions UI designer. It's such perfect design and so clean, no matter how much nonsense they're being asked to display.
Okay, I've watched a terrible streamer play the first couple of hours. It's bollocks. Kojima's writing is bloated wank and, with it being new fiction for him, there's a lot of explaining he feels the need to do. Rain is not just rain. You'd think rain damaging packages would be self-explanatory but in Kojima's mind it has to be super-rain that ages people and brings out dead ghost people. Characters all have terrible, on the nose names. "I'm Die-Hardman because it's hard for me to die." "I'm Sam Porter Bridges because I'm a Porter who makes bridges, both physical and metaphorical." There's a point where Amelie Strand (President and backwards ageing Lindsay Wagner) explains what a strand is in excruciating detail.
One of the characters is called Bridget because bridge. Fuck. Gulliermo del Toro's face is used but not his voice which is off-putting.
Worst of all, the pacing is bad. I remember people complaining about MGS V's walk n' tape attitudes. In its stead, Death Stranding opts for a walk followed by a 30-45 cutscene. At best, you get a Low Roar or Chvrches song kicking in whilst Sam wobbles about down a hillside and the camera tries to pick something to look at. Also, Sam Porter Bridges (because he rarely refers to himself as Sam) has 'allergies' that make him cry solitary tears. BECAUSE THIS IS PROFOUND, GUYS. He cried four times in the first hour. Kojima thinks he's making something grand here but the reviews I've seen never point to any pay-off.
The only thing that might interest me in this game is the walking but it's all the same rocky hills and rivers. Combat looks too simple to really get my attention.
I'd say a good half of the positive reviews I've seen have critiqued it for stuff you're actually seeing/ doing and the praise comes essentially down to "'Cause Kojima!!!!!!" and then they slap 9/10 on it.
You see it in the youtube comments, to be honest. A lot of people coming out and saying this game has genuine depth to its story without elaborating on it. It's all fucking surface level to me, though. You know how MGSV opens with that quote about language? This game opens with one about strands and ropes. You can't have a deep narrative when the first seconds hit you over the head with the theme.
Why are there ghost people? Why is Reedus a reluctant hero? Why is Mads Mikkelson turning up every hour to sing? Why is the rain so harmful to us when you've got a vibrant, young forested version of the United States? Why is it, with this game about connecting people, you've seen all the people you're going to come into contact with inside the first hour? Everyone else is a hologram.
Bought this on pc yesterday, downloaded it over night and shall be jumping in today.
No clue what to expect other than nonsense and walking.
I bought it yesterday yoo. Its fucking stupid but its actually fun and not half bad. Looks fucking amazing on PC too
This is basically every Kojima game ever.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dark Soldier
I take it all back, this game must be good if PC Gamer are prepared to take a load of money to repeatedly write about it being good.
https://twitter.com/botherer/status/1287797149913104385