Printable View
So I used to make random words based on Dothraki and Arabic to entertain kids I was looking after (fuck you Magic). However it's become more Scandinavian now, in particular Finnish, and I'm talking to myself in this completely gibberish non-language. It's actually a little hard to stop myself doing it and I genuinely think I'm broken now.
So to make this more threadworthy and not just 'lol look at the freak' what weird shit do you do?
:sick:
When I was about 14 I made a CM01/02 database with a team called 'The Smiths', with every player a 200 CA player named after a Smiths song. Not entirely sure what my rationale was.
Strip naked to take a shite.
Obviously when I played a lot of FM i'd daydream myself doing press conferences when having a shit, which changed into doing heel promos when I got bored of FM and was watching too much wrestling.
?Quote:
Originally Posted by 7om
Nothing wrong with a good nudey poo.
Didn't everyone?Quote:
Originally Posted by igor_balis
Yeah, this is you going full mental. Sure.
As strange as everything else I've done is, I think rambling to myself in a fictional language based on Dothraki, Arabic and fucking Finnish is a little worse.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
I was a member in another forum years ago where someone admitted to doing this in a confession thread. However, he added that he squatted with his feet up on the seat. Fucking weirdo.Quote:
Originally Posted by 7om
Isn't that the right way to do it? To keep your shite pipe straight and all.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bernanke
I used to wonder how I would act if I was really the manager of a side who had ruined football by winning literally everything with all the best players, and the answer was 'like a complete twat'.Quote:
Originally Posted by igor_balis
Gibberish.Quote:
Originally Posted by leedsrevolution
It sounds like it could be a language but there are no set words.
In case you've forgotten, you almost flew into a warzone for a whiff of internet clopper.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
I actually did.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
I used the out that the board gave me because Kiko found my Twitter which led him to her, plus I felt that I 'could make it work'.
Ukraine is a MASSIVE shit hole and I genuinely thought I was going to die on the roads.
Anyway, she was cold towards me which pissed me off so I started speaking to her less and less. She then said she was going to the hospital because she had a heart problem but actually met up with Mert's cousin for a week. Then she came back, said she was going to marry him and fucked off. She came back a couple of months ago and I told her to leave me alone when she wanted to talk to me.
What a clusterfuck everything was.
What
Wait. Rewind a bit?
I never bought your retreat, because Amigo found your Twitter and your webcam profile the day you first posted about it, but as if you actually went. Fair play.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
http://i.imgur.com/aROuDp3.pngQuote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
I've also never been so cold. I was an idiot who forgot to pack a coat/jumper/anything with long sleeves and in Ukraine the government only turns on the heating during November-February.
She was a sort as well. :cool:
What sort of rapey little stalker is Amigo?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Mahow! You absolute pokulgin-shasha.
I can't believe you fucking went:D
So did she not even get her tits out for you in person?
Who knew that the opening post wouldn't be the most terrifying in the thread.
I can't believe you went without a jumper, that's the least believable part of the whole affair.
Nope :(Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Follies of man. Keep doing you.
I don't even know what to say.
Mahow. :cool:
Well...just well. Fuck.
This has just pulled me out of retirement. Jesus Christ.
:D brilliant
I bet his admiration for us (the only ones who said do it) convinced him to go through with it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
You flew to a war zone for some webcam thot?
No, I flew to an area pretty far from a war zone.Quote:
Originally Posted by Manc
I then got into a taxi and drove a lot closer to the war zone. I think I was still like 4 or 5 hours away by car.
I was more likely to die from the shitty air from nearby power stations.
It sounds mental, and it is, but most wouldn't have the balls to do it. It was worth a try. So nothing came out of it and his balls got frozen. Oh well, back to the regular schedule.
Fuck me, almost a year ago...
Also, if I had not gone and she had not been so cold towards me I'd have been absolutely fucking devastated when she chose Mert's cousin.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
So did Amigo know what was going on the whole time but just didn't tell us?
Is the van still available? We should pay mert's cousin a visit.
Kiko knew I was lying when I retreated too.Quote:
Originally Posted by 7om
Him following me on Twitter is what made me shit myself.
So you posted about all this on Twitter? :D
Fair play, lad. I thought you were insane at the time, but you can chalk it down to experience. You avoided being scammed, which was the main worry.
Who the fuck follows you on Twitter?
The group took a collective decision. We all love banter, but this was real life and nobody wanted you to get into actual shit. It seemed a sensible way of letting you know others could find out, without highlighting it to the world.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
Anyway, I'm glad it 'worked out' in the sense you're a) not dead and b) not scammed.
We found the chat as well. She was pretty attractive, to be fair to Mahow.
EDIT: Like GS said, we kept it within ourselves to ensure that real-life issues wouldn't arise.
It's fucking voyeurish behaviour in the extreme. Not a chance anyone gave a fuck about his 'welfare'.Quote:
Originally Posted by GS
Kiko and Amigo are rats.
Maybe you don't, but not everybody is a cunt.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Yeah, but Mahow could hardly compete with some of the members she was being sent.Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca
I'd give enough of a fuck not to get some perverse glee from him in his own life. Jesus, keep it on here .Quote:
Originally Posted by GS
I actually did care about his welfare.
Care that it got destroyed, that is.
Right, give us some linkage of her then.
I was posting her chat room on Twitter, she asked me to advertise.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
Seconded.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Ah, I see.
With the million of views I'm sure you get everyday business must've been bustling.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Cam4, Mary_cute2.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bernanke
I had a few hundred followers including some webcam twitter advertising accounts who each had around 10k followers.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
You have a few hundred followers? Why aren't you getting us new members then? :face:
I'm not a rat considering this is the first you've really heard about any of this since it happened.
What a dime peice. Well played, How.
Tee-heeing in a little private coven while you stalk his life isn't a whole pile better really.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
You'll recall that mahow offered all of the information publicly.
When the group realised that you could track it down quite easily, there was a discussion and a view was taken that he needed to know that was the case.
You shouldn't be attempting to misrepresent it as you are. Neither Kiko, nor anybody else for that matter, was a 'rat' given it was never mentioned again and allowed to quietly disappear into forum lore.
Secret messages about some poor cunt losing the plot and deciding to oar into his private life for jollies? "The Group" are nothing but rats.Quote:
Originally Posted by GS
Nobody messes with The Group, mate.
http://www.learnawesome.com/wp-conte...onecutters.jpgQuote:
Originally Posted by Pepe
We didn't tee hee any more than people did in the actual thread. It was more a pointer that he was doing all of these things in public and probably shouldn't.
You're a saint, mate.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
I see that Giggles is still a cunt.
Fucking right I am.
And if we hadn't, he'd never have gone.
And I see you still think you're above anything. Hardly surprising you crawled out from under your rock to be involved here, at least some of the others behaviour would raise an eyebrow.Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca
I am, actually.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
What does Giggles get out of this forum? I don't understand.
Mahow admits he went to Ukraine to see the cam girl and yet the thread still gets ruined. Fuck's sake, guys.
Starting to see what you do now anyway.Quote:
Originally Posted by GS
And in fairness, up to now I found a few of you rather annoying which wasn't really a big deal as it passed the time and I was around long enough to know what threads to stay out of. But I honestly hadn't realised just what sort of cunts a few of you really are.
Let's talk shit about him in the group guys. Time for some tee hee.
Why was she cold towards you when you got there if she had been asking you to go over?Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
Coming from the person who's happy to kill innocent people for being Muslim.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
She's a cam girl. They don't really love you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
I think he expected her to be all over Mahow for money rather than being apathetic that he'd come over.
Obviously but I was more wondering whether she had asked for money and he told her to fuck off or if she just never actually thought he would come but then surely she would have given a fake address.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
Never said that once, and keep it in the right thread geebag.Quote:
Originally Posted by randomlegend
Yeah, let's have a full holiday report.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
I think it's the least we deserve. Did you take the chair?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
What qualities is The Group looking for when accepting new members?
A commitment to racial purity. Soz.
Out the way, Lewis. I'm serious here.
A few days before she told me her boss had found out that I was coming over as he had read her Skype and was demanding half of whatever I spent during the trip. She used this to still work whilst I was there and tell her boss that I had cancelled the trip.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
She was just pretty aloof during the few days I was there. I'm not entirely sure why she invited me over, it worked against her because I don't think I actually went back to her room on the website (she kept asking me to come back but that I shouldn't spend any money) and I was becoming distant during our Skype chats as I knew nothing would ever happen. Whereas before I went I was dreaming that I'd use the money that I'm hoping to get to bring her over here, which would have been a HUGE mistake.
Kiko's out then.
How was Kiev? When we went it was full on mental and full of crooks. Can't imagine it having improved?
The place dying on it's arse for posts too and this shower chatting among themselves instead on it. What's the point?
Just leave then you massive cunt.
Pipe down you pointless little boy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
So you gave her money before you went out for her boss? Or have I read it wrong?Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
Was always going to end in tears but glad you didn't get bummed.
Landed, she greeted me with her friend who also works on the website and we got into the taxi. I was in and out of sleep as I hadn't slept the night before with most of the time I was awake being thrown across the car due to the wank roads. The taxi had no seatbelts in the back and I smashed my head on the roof a couple of times. The taxi driver also went balls deep into a pothole around 2am Ukraine time so we had to sit outside in the freezing cold for 30 minutes or so whilst he changed it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Arrived at her town, went to a shop to buy some shit and then to get keys for an apartment where we would stay. I wasn't happy but they wanted either my passport or driving licence to hold onto so I opted for the lesser of two evils and handed over my driving licence. Got there and then went to bed.
Then it was pretty much the same each day/night. She'd go to the studio where she did her camming, make me also use my tablet to visit her room, then she'd come back with her friend, we'd all talk for a little bit and then sleep until she would go back to the studio.
On the last night we went to a restaurant, had some food and she made me drink a few cocktails (2 or 3) and promised to give me a kiss if I did it. When the taxi came to take me back to the airport she gave me a half hearted hug and a peck on the cheek.
It was such a waste of money and 4 days.
I've already tried, mate. Let's be honest if i can't get in you've got no chance.Quote:
Originally Posted by 7om
Pipe up you pensioner on a forum full of 'little boys'Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Take me to the burn unit.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
No, he wanted 50% of everything that I spent during the time in Ukraine if I was to go is what she told me. Including all taxi money (I paid $400 total for the 6 hours to her town and back to Kiev), any presents etc etc. So she told him I wasn't coming and we got an apartment so he wouldn't know I was staying there.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adamski
No idea, instantly got into a taxi and went.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kikó
The roads in the Ukraine were a fucking abomination though.
:cool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
Did you sniff her clothes or anything?
No but I almost died not farting or taking a shit whilst she was there.
It was torture holding all those gasses in.
This is amazing. Did you create this thread knowing somebody would give you the opportunity to tell us about it?
Once it looked like it wasn't on, you should've just let rip. Give her something to remember you by. I've recently discovered a line I can't cross. I reviewed a game called Rally Copters this week and I really, really wanted to give it a Colin McRae tagline. I couldn't do it. I had five different options all swimming in my head and I just couldn't convince myself they were great to put down for public consumption.
This comes hours after being temporarily banned from Giant Bomb's forums for suggesting a Swedish skier dying whilst filming for Ubisoft's Steep was 'one way to get your name on the box.'
Nope but I had been thinking of creating a thread for a few months. A little happy that it's turned out this way.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
So hold on, while you were in Ukraine you were still visiting her chat room via your tablet? Am I reading that right?
Mahow is happy at the way this has turned out. Fucking oyft.
I loved the high-ways close to Kiev, they where like 2 times as wide as anything we have in Sweden.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mahow
Yeah, she told me to do so.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
A couple of months before I actually went out there I genuinely hated it all. I could only be in there for a maximum of 20 minutes at a time, it was fucking awful.
I'm happy that it's all come out.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic
Yeah just outside Kiev they were fine, I thought my Dad was being too harsh on the roads or they had improved since he had last been. Just outside of Kiev though and you couldn't call them roads, they were about 90% potholes.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bernanke
So the entire thing was a waste of time, really then. Did she ask for any money while you were over there? This entire "my boss wants half" thing reeks of a scam, because it just makes no sense at all.
Nope.Quote:
Originally Posted by SvN
I know, that set alarm bells going off and yet nothing really came of it.
Did you try your new language out on her?
I didn't have it then, I was actually attempting to learn Russian at that time.Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco
You should just go the whole hog, learn elvish and buy a fedora.
Sadly hats just don't work on me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco
Wow. Can't believe that happened.
And yet still no pictures.
Of her? Google it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammer
No, selfies and that that you took out there.
Did you try it on at all with her, Mahow?
Don't tell me you went all that way just to sit off camera and mod her chat room?
I deleted them all.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
By trying it all you mean hoping she made the first move? If so, yes.Quote:
Originally Posted by 7om
Going out there was me doing the most that I could do, I physically couldn't attempt to try anything. I was far too scared.
Oh my days.
Honestly beyond anything I've ever heard in my life. Incredible. I didn't know people like Mahow existed.
Remember when you used to post as a twenty-four year old tennis player whose bird finished with him after having an abortion?
Crippling social anxiety around hot females and a complete lack of self confidence will do this.Quote:
Originally Posted by mokbull
It's why I didn't talk on the cam site until last year as I always knew that I could get sucked in like this.
True, but I was 13 years old then. Plus my thing was pretty low risk / low involvement.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Remember Hulls Tiger?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lewis
Disappointed I wasn't part of The Group. We all know I'm good at internet stalking.
This is up there with the guy who started a thread on him believing he had become involved with a load of mafia types and then just disappeared when he said he was going to the police.
I didn't realise the initial story was on the old board, gutted that's lost.
Yeah it's a shame the old board seems fully dead now.