Looks like the old one was a fatality of the switchover. I'll see if I can restore it, but we might have to start again.
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Looks like the old one was a fatality of the switchover. I'll see if I can restore it, but we might have to start again.
All the Korean stories :(
The Koreans hacked it. Jimmy never existed :cool:
I quit my job yesterday in honour.
All my revenge stories. :(
You should be glad there's no longer evidence of your shit.
:D
Fair point.
Can we delete the relationship thread too plz kthx.
Usually my jobs by email alerts get me some admin roles in the North East of England.
Today, a company recommended me an Assistant Manager role in South Carolina. At a Burger King Drive-Thru.
I got a new laptop today which would be nice (rendering times cut by 50% :drool:) but the fan on it is immense and never shuts up.
Sounds much like Arsenal Fan TV.
For the third time in four years there's a re-org of the company structure and job cuts imminent.
There's no chance I'm getting turfed less than a month after they threw shares at me to keep me, but it's really fucking annoying to keep having to deal with uncertainty in job roles, functions and what the company is doing.
There's a town hall tomorrow with some pretty senior folks in town (by no coincidence) and it's going to be a sight to behold. 3 months ago we were told me were right sized, now we're not. Lies, lies, lies!
Omg we might be getting rid of the sales idiots.
Remember I said they were going to employ GENERIC sales people with no industry experience and train them up? Well that's been cancelled because of 3 of us internally (3 very highly thought of employees) to potentially make a sales SUPER TEAM, from point of sale to installation.
This could spell the end of the sales team as we know it. :drool:
The MD and owner both couldn't believe they hadn't thought of this before (which is lol).
Anyway...£70k p/a plus?
It’s just a bollocks business term for a meeting where the board talk at the minions about the company
As if anyone is going to give a mong £75k :D
They'd be out of business in a week with decisions like that. From the stuff you say here you sound like one of the worst and most trouble making employees imaginable.
That sounds like management speak for cost cutting.
I don't get any commission for my sales work, but my field manager is commission only. It makes it a fun relationship, with him constantly screaming GET IT OUT THE DOOR and me not caring because my figures aren't measured.
How so? I won't be doing just sales so I'll get on a good basic. I'll be selling, and delivering the service. Only thing I won't be doing is supporting. I will also be handing over post-sale to other engineers.
They could get rid of at least 3 idiot sales people, that's potentially up to 6. And they won't be employing the 4 sales people they are advertising for just now.
And most importantly their overall payroll will be cut.
When Magic realizes he will now have to do twice the work for the same money. :drool:
This is like when my dog reckons she'll get a walk and breakfast, but actually I'm just going to work.
On this day, in 2019, I will post a picture of my payslip. Quote me.
If work can sort a transfer, it looks like I'm moving to Falmouth. Something to do ennit.
About 300 miles, lol. My mate is living there, and his flatmate is moving out in a few months. I've visited and it's really nice, my walk to work would be 0.3 miles, literally along the seafront. It's quite twee and hoity toity but that's alright cus so am I. It's pretty small, but it's a student town with good pubs and restaurants and something of a night life, so I'm sold.
The flat is nowt special, but it's in a lovely, well located area. You can see the sea from the front door! Rent is just under 400/month inc bills for a room which is affordable if not cheap.
We're still thinking of that whole area for summer hols as it's about the only place the Mrs hasn't been yet. If we do, then that place is on the list after a quick skim on Google.
Igor could give you a tour.
RIP Igor, lost to darkest Cornwall.
:lol:
I dunno, I don't really do stuff anyway. There's nice pubs and nice places to eat and I matched with pretty art student girls on tinder when I visited before and my flatmate-to-be likes watching football and getting rat arsed on booze and occasionally other stuff every few weekends or so, so that's already a significant improvement on my current situation.
It beats having to feign interest in my mum's anecdotes about the thermostat or whatever.
If you're still living at home then move anywhere to move out.
If you like cold wind and long grass, it's pretty good I suppose.
Well, quite. I really don't want to be stuck in Rugby long term, so I'm absolutely not going to waste rent on a shithole flat here, especially as my mum is incredibly easy to live with by parent standards, but I'm up for taking a gamble on anywhere half-decent. My basic plan is to move around from flat-share to flat-share with various pals around the UK until I find somewhere I want to settle, moving back home during the gaps between them.
Manchester mate and Sheffield mate are always moving from flat to flat on a nearly yearly basis, so that'll be the next move if I don't want to live in Cornwall forever.
Does that SW bit not get proper weather in the summer?
You can just learn the accordion or something you twee, hoity-toity faggot.
Thought you were gonna come to Belfast? :(
Are you in Belfast now?
Yeah.
So it went great and I've got another meeting with the MD next week to shore things up. Me and another guy will be 'super BDM/Consultants'. Our boss will be raging at losing two of his best engineers but he has to understand no more shite sales. We're getting the best partners to work with as well. :drool:
Padlock on the gate in 6 months.
It doesn't sound good to me - sounds like a desperate cost-cutting measure.
I like how Magic, who moans every time he is asked to do a basic function, thinks being given someone elses job to do as well is going to make him happier.
Running out of work at 6:30pm. This is my life now.
Came in to work yesterday and my computer wouldn’t start. Managed to get into safe mode and gather all my files into one place for IT to grab off it.
They came, took it and reimaged it, upgrading to Windows 10. They also added 4gb of RAM. Since I got it back yesterday afternoon + some time this morning in think it’s spent more time at 100% CPU utilization and frozen than it has working. Think it’s a hard push for a new one today.
So will you be doing sales on top of what you do now?
He'll be seething within the first few days at the extra work.
He'll be flying straight into the upper middle class. You can quote me on that.
More than doubling his salary within a month, you bet he is.
I have to write all the rejection letters to the design agencies we've interviewed over the past few days.
This is miserable.
No. I have 4 years' experience, 10 in total of doing engineering. I know exactly what I would expect to be put in to me (instead of the absolute shite we get just now). It's more a consultant role but getting the sale too. Initially I will have a hand in bringing it through to install and maybe post-install but that's very much transitional.
Me and my very close friend and fellow hot shot in work will be taking this on (he has very similar experience to me). We're initially thinking of a 'team commission' structure as a lot of our ventures will be joint. Every job is done off a spreadsheet that is so dumbed down even quince could do it. Which means a shit load of mis-selling and us losing money, or massively ripping off customers. We will spec jobs up on a per job basis with the exact engineering costs and the right hardware.
Also this is a huge change, our current sales team consist of:
4 people with NO technical knowledge whatsoever.
3 internal sales admins with NO technical knowledge whatsoever.
I made the point of the market changing, and if we don't evolve we'll be left behind which is already happening because these clowns have no idea what to sell clients. With two consultant ex-engineers that's going to change, and change big time. They haven't even met half-target this year. Their initial plan was to hire 4 more sales people with no knowledge to make up those numbers.
In my experience cutting back on staff often leads to less work for those remaining.
This has to be an even biggest delusion than GS believing he was going to quit.
It seems a great way to get people who don't give a shit normally to care immensely, at the very least.
Same reason why everyone is a 'manager' nowadays.
Executive Vice President Magic :drool:
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Who wants to touch me?
Didn't it turn out to be no-one, there's a whole thread about that somewhere.
I think we lost that in the hacking scandal.
That was left too easy.
I've just seen a really good friend from my first year at Uni at the hospital. She's doing an F3 year - normally you only do two foundation years but a lot of people are deciding to do a third one as they don't know why specialty to train in. Basically as far as I can work out you pick up locum shifts and stuff and then have a jolly old time.
I didn't have chance to quiz her on the logistics but she's living in Vienna and just flies back for the few shifts she decides to do :cab: I can only assume she/her partner are loaded because I can't believe that's financially viable but if it is, then fucking hell I'll have a bit.
Aren't locums paid like £2,000 for 8 hours work?
Locum consultants maybe, not a locum foundation doctor.
Friend said the highest paying locum shifts going for F2s were ~£500 for a weekend night shift. Still a lot obviously, although most shifts aren't weekend night shifts and pay less (not sure how much less).
EDIT: I guess the area of the country probably makes a difference as well, this is all based on East Anglia.
She probably spends her days off sharing NHS crisis memes.
My work laptop is doing my fucking head in today trying to convert files.
Mine was doing my head in with Excel, dealing with a big one with lots of formulas seemed to use 100% of my CPU which is infuriating because every click destroyed my machine.
2nd attempt, 40 minutes in and it's doing fuck all bar telling me it's importing.
It's going out the window next.
Yep. Since mine died Monday and I got it back it has been horrible. Constant 100% CPU useage even when doing nothing. Still a year away from being able to upgrade too. Hoping the IT guy is a LAD and will help me get around that. Not looking good though
Just checked my holiday thinking I'd used quite a bit and wanted to see how much I have left.
42 days... I forgot that we get extra holiday when we have to travel for work. So now I'm considering just leaving for a month and seeing if the place is still standing when I get back.
Is that saved up or do you get that in a year? 42 days is incredible.
I think I had 8 days left over from last year. I've just had to travel quite a bit. Oh and Christmas/New Year fell on weekends so you get an extra 3 days there.
Would they allow you to take it all in one go?
Would they notice your absence?
They can’t just let the guy that draws the pictures swan off willy-nilly.
If my job ever involved drawing I'd be fired immediately.
I'm currently searching for a stock photo because the one I used caused issues. Not a big fan of black people in Japan apparently.
I've had a really weird couple of days. Banana and me decided that enough was enough and it was time for a change.[\NotaNugget]
Anyways, we handed in two weeks notice. Snapped up a job in Oxfordshire then was asked yesterday to change mind by the GM. I said we'd think about it as it's Bananas decision. Spent the break trying to convince her then another manager from the company text to offer a job for us both.
In the end we decide we're staying and I'm going on an apprentice cpd course whilst the Mrs is being sat down with the higher ups so they can map our a career plan for her.
Pretty happy at the moment.
Who the fuck is Banana?
The Mrs. 😎
Isn't that Jord?
I'd be more inclined to believe it is an actual banana.
What kind @randomlegend though is important.
Bananas are rank. They can all fuck off.
Astonishing. Bit harsh considering you've never met Smiffy's one.
The cunts withheld my bonus. My boss went on holiday yesterday so I won't even pretend I'm working anymore.
I gave up a due Korean bonus to come here. Worth it though.
Companies can pretty much do what they like.
I literally saved someone’s life and got a £20 New Look voucher and a handshake from someone that could clear my mortgage once a year. Fuck your bonus’, fat cats.
I've been offered a 10k raise and a promotion if I keep my house in order for the next 5 months. Turns out the big-big boss was at some place I was at and saw 'untoward behavior' around the same time that I made a couple of monumental fuck-ups at work. I have to prove that was a temporary blip and then I'm basically running the show from then on. Bit weird so I went out to the pub and plan not to do any coke in the toilet.
@Smiffy tells me this time it's for real, he even wrote a song about her
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb2Yw3QwgZA
Bit of an embellishment but yeah it's pretty much all there.
It read like he did the coke.
It reads like the big boss wants him out the door and they've given him a carrot to chase so he doesn't meff things up too much while they look for a replacement.
Probably.
Since I now qualify as a student again, I am able to apply for student jobs. I know two principals at a national-size architecture firm, and I know the hiring manager for the Edmonton office. One of the principals told me to apply. So it's basically a shoe-in, but I'm still second-guessing everything. For example, do I include an Interests section in my resume? Do I take anything out?
» architecture (e.g. works by Max Dudler, Terunobu Fujimori, Kengo Kuma, C.F. Moller, John Pawson, Peter Zumthor)
» art (e.g. pieces by Franz Kline, Richard Serra, Marjan Teeuwen, Canan Tolon)
» bad jokes (e.g. paraprosdokians, puns, shaggy dog stories)
» community development (e.g. affordable housing, community arts programming)
» neuroscience
» political and social theory
» politics (municipal, provincial, national)
» soccer (coaching, playing)
» urban development issues (e.g. regional farmland management, transit-oriented development
Super cringe.
Remember the mixology.
Tell me more about these shaggy dog stories.
You should take 'paraprosdokians' out so you can surprise them when you turn up completely absent a sense of humour.
who's shagging dogs?
Don't include interests on your CV, anyone that can bullet point their personality is someone to watch out for. Work them into your cover letter where they make you look good like the local politics/urban/community development stuff. I couldn't give less of a shit of your opinion on Dadaism unless you're going to force me to listen to it, in which case I will hate it.
Well the changes that saw a bunch of people get made redundant at work mean that for April, when we're apparently in a month between people leaving or (like me and another girl) having our secondments ended early and new people coming in to fill the gaps from elsewhere as part of the reshuffle, there'll be less people to do the management-y stuff than they have people to do it.
Can already hear me being asked to basically keep doing my secondment even though they're ending it early.
What do you do @Ian?
@phonics: apparently it's good to pair typefaces by serif for titles and non-serif for text, so I'm going with Bank Gothic and Trajan. :cool:
Seriously? I would heartily recommend not doing that.
I assume you mean Trajan for your title and then Bank Gothic as body text? Trajan is a headline font that you use for the front of a book cover, not for a resume title, you look like a Greek restaurant. And then for your body text you're going to force people to read a font in all capital letters? They'll zone out within 10 words. I must admit that I hate 99.9999999% of Serifs so I'm slightly biased but I'm still correct.
Go for DIN throughout. It's versatile enough that you can use it multiple different ways in the same block of text and it all works together. You can find a pirated copy in about 15 seconds of googling.
https://cdn.myfonts.net/s/aw/720x360/212/0/108779.png
What type of product?
K, I'm bored of my resume charade now. There is no interests section anymore. There used to be one, but it never included bad jokes. The typefaces used are Aileron for the headings (Light, Regular, and Semibold) and Garamond for the body.
But I do have one real question: should I include in my education section that I will be attending UBC's Master of Architecture program this fall if I am going to be applying for student internships? Or do I mention that in my cover letter and exclude it from my resume given that I haven't technically started?
I do like DIN as a typeface, though. I'm pretty into Neutraface 2 (https://houseind.com/hi/neutraface_no2) right now too.
Pro tip for piracy using a famous search engine: "site:github.com typeface". Add ttf or otf to narrow down if necessary.
Times New Roman for everything and be done with it. "Typefaces." :sick:
I'm a Calibri man.
Arial. Calibri is acceptable though.
Calibri is comic sans for people who want to be taken seriously.
Is it fuck, that's Arial's job.
I'm a Courier New fan. Achieves that redacted Cold War memo vibe that is otherwise hard to nail.
Cambria.
Left alignment or fully justified?
Anyone who uses left alignment is a wrong un.
It depends how clever the software you're using is when it comes to justifying the text. InDesign, for instance, is very good at analysing bit blocks of text rather than individual lines, and as a result, the text is a lot easier to read.
Justified is for Newspapers and Annual Reports. That's it.
And essays.
An old designer here used to justify EVERYTHING, despite repeated feedback that it just didn't work on the web. In the end I told the devs to just ignore any justified text and left align it, because he simply couldn't stop doing it.
Oh no its all fallen apart. :D
A shocking and unexpected development.
Not totally. But they wanted us to take a 10k! Paycut and be be on a better commission package, have the same targets as the other clowns, and still leave the headless sales manager in charge of major decisions that could greatly affect our income. The clown was asking me for a proposition email to send to a customer today, for example.
Not the role I had in mind. At all. They are hiring two generic salespeople who will be on exactly the same package as well. Insulting at worst, missing the point at best.
Not happy.
The first thing to say about this is it's definitely not cost-cutting.
Couldn't agree more, the one thing they aren't trying to do here is slash outgoings and con their own employees.
Still going to publish your payslip next year, Magic?
£70k a year was what you were claiming, lol.
What should I do? Bearing in mind this was my idea.
Meanwhile, they're asking for volunteers to train people on our work at another site. Not many takers given that's how most of the workforce lost their last job.
I can't believe none of us saw that coming. Magic. :(
:(
Are they still hiring the two new engineers?
They're hiring a mirror to compliment their existing engineer headcount.
Let's get back to fonts.
I'm a Verdana man.
I remember deciding gardensoccer.com should all be in Verdana, including the forum, as a momentous day. What a life I've lived. :cool:
Tell them that. If they've missed the point then they've missed the point. Why would you sign up to something that isn't what was discussed, particularly given it's a pay cut. "No thanks".
On a side note, our gaff is doing another reorganisation which means another head cut reduction. That's the third time in 4 years and a distraction of a seven thousand strong organisation.
Told us in a webcast out the blue and even the individual team leaders had no warning or further info. Smashing. Sweeping changes I suspect, but not much in the way of job losses. Annoying.
I was winding down Friday nicely and the fucking phone rang. 550km later and I'm just home and missed 1½ of the two live games tonight :moop:
Definitely taking up the holiday option next week.
In the midst of trying to watch an England game this development at Magic's work has really brightened up my evening.
You're a positive fellow, I'll give you that. Absolutely blindly and insanely positive, but positive all the same.
You should have left when you had the chance.
Nobody quoted me on the doubling salary thing right?
I'd need to earn 80k p/a to double my take home salary lol.
Gies a swatch o' yer payslip, big man.
Using my newfound clout, I have applied for a mighty student intership at a national-sized architecture firm.
That sounds like something mert would say.
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Mmm Banana.
The last couple of days has been interesting. I think once the emotion was taken out the decision to stick around was an easy one. I never thought working in a kitchen would be so stressful and it's not even the cooking side that makes it so.
That third picture is how Magic's marriage ends.
You look healthy mate. Nice to see.
Agreed, but lose the goatee Smiff.
Working in a kitchen was probably the most stressful job I've ever had, but I did enjoy it in a weird way.
Buy an iron.
I quite like the goatee. Is she ok with it when you feast on her cunt?
So Smiff threatened to leave before bottling it and sticking around anyway. This place really does predict everything doesn't it.
I was meant to be in work at 830 today. Got pissed up last night and woke up at 930, woops. Also sent a facebook message at 3am to a random nerdy lad I went to school with berating him for not accepting my friend request. Fuck sake.
Just rolled out of bed. Had an impromptu all day drinking session yesterday and feel absolutely dreadful. Really bad timing too, I've got so much I need to get done today.
I'm in the last week of my notice and it's glorious. Just had my haircut and going to some talk now. It's glorious outside as well.
Meanwhile:
https://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/showt...567#post260567
:D
Yeah, the day ended up being rather unproductive in the end :D
I did finally start work at about half 2 and got the proposal I needed to finish completed, so not a total loss of a day.
Pfft. The case I pulled out of the fire on Thursday was for nothing as the report failed the audit in every single possible way. Also, our HPs appear to be going through the naming conventions you get when Champ Man decides to run out of English names.
Fair play to you Shindig for having so much passion for what I can only assume is data entry work.
I, on the other hand, ruptured my third bursting disk in 10 months today.
Producing zero oil. :cool:
Today the director rolled in barking DOES ANYONE HERE PLAY GOLF, which can only mean he is short of players for a ghastly corporate golf event so I stayed fucking quiet... or tried to, but my cover was blown when the logistics woman screamed JIMMY PLAYS (obv not my real name) and I realised I must have mentioned playing on holiday the other day.
I then had to make a load of noises about how I was really shit and would embarrass him, and made him go away. Truly horrible five minutes of my life.
You should just never speak in the office again, Jim.
That's the saddest story ever on so many levels.
They'd believe you were train spotting.
You'd never have to talk to them again.
Isn't he working on an 'engines' company now? They'll be all over that shit.
Bird watching then.
Again, definitely believable.
Neither of those would be remotely believable based on his posts here.
The holiday he was referring to was his last job.
@Foe: It's not passion. I simply like troubleshooting. If there was none of that, I'd be off.
Desk bound for the last couple of days and I'm losing my fucking mind. Dunno how people do it.
I'm a career desker and I've always had pipedreams about jobs that involve going out and doing things. Once in a previous job I had to go and look around a hotel or something, best day of my life.
So I asked my boss whether there was any chance I was going to get told today what I'm actually doing next week with my secondment ending, both in terms of what hours I'm moving back to and what I'll actually be doing.
"Well I'm off so there's a good chance you'll just be covering for me." Excellent. First week after my secondment as a team leader gets ended early.... do team leader work for a week. They're good at this shit.
Tell them you'll only do it if you're paid whatever he would be for that week's work.
Having initially been given UK, Ireland, Benelux and Poland to deal with at work, I've now settled in nicely and they've decided it's time to add me another large market. Naturally they've gone for the big one, the one no one wants, the one we love to hate. It's France.
At some point in our lives we must all face up to our one true foe, and for me that moment has arrived. Bring on the garlic-eating cunts.
I applied for 2 jobs last night. One I have a chance of getting.
The other one I have fuck all chance of getting, but my application is so brave that they may give me an interview just to lol at me. But, whilst they lol, my foot is firmly in the door.
Jimmy, eventually you're going to be sent on a trip to France where they expect you to meet lots of French people and be nice to them.
You must film the entire thing. For TTH.
Worse than French people. French farmers.
Do you sell tyres? Got a lot of use for tyres does your average French farmer.
Aberdeenshire farmers are the worst.
I don't really deal with the end users, I deal with the corrupt middle man stockists and apparently in France these pricks are rampant.
Yo this shit sucks.
Just had someone throw an amazing spaz out in the office. Security matched them out in the end whilst the unhinged individual told everyone in sight which form of genitalia they were. I’m a ‘smirking cunt’ which sounds nice and tight.
I still have another day off before starting my new job on Thursday. Even longer Easter :cool:
I got an absolute full barrel pelting from some Brummie cunt earlier. Got called a 'fucking know nothing spastic' (pretty accurate apart from the spastic), and then an hour later he phoned back to order another grand's worth of kit. Who's the mug here, I ask you.
It must be international abuse-a-TTHer-at-work day.
Did he apologize?
No. The customer is always right.
Was a fairly sudden and spectacular loss of temper, he must have problems in his life.
Living in Birmingham being the main one
Everyone's chimping out because they're back at work.
Do people actually care about their job (if they’re not the big boss)? My working day consists of finishing as quickly as possible cos I can go home when I’m done.
Last week they changed the bonus structure so it is practically unattainable so I honestly no longer care what I do. I don’t work weekends, I get a car and I finish between 3 and 4 most days - regardless of what I do, how much money I make the company or how hard I work. There’s literally no incentive to perform.
I’ll either have this job for the next 20 years and kill myself when I turn 50, or somehow stumble into an actual challenging job and consider trying to do well. :arry: There is room for progression here so hopefully I get lucky on a big bet or something.
Lol so everything has taken a tragic turn for the worse. On friday, we got an email from the HR director saying she was about to tell our boss about the upcoming restructuring and us leaving the team having applied for sales jobs (< NOT what happened).
We were together and both just looked in disbelief. Technically we haven't signed or agreed to anything, and we most certainly didn't apply for any positions.
So that's it. It seems to be set in stone. But if I can't agree personal terms (of which I have no idea what they will be, I've seen no commission plan, wages, anything), then I'm fucked. The board will dislike me for having stopped their recruitment and thinking they'd sorted the new roles, my boss will hate me because he thinks I'm a sneaky weasel that went behind his back, and the team will hate me for abandoning ship.
I'll be ostracised and become a pariah, and my position will no longer be tenable. I'll have destroyed my career at this company at least, 4 years of hard work down the drain.
I can't believe the wheels have been put in motion by the executives without us having agreed anything. Fuck sake.
Amazing start to the week.
Had to push a website update live for an important client. I told the devs well in advance and they made a total pigs ear of it for some reason. It was meant to go live at 9am and the client had social media posts all automatically firing out promoting the update. It's now 9:29 and it's JUST gone live.
Now I await the excuse, because I can't think of any that would be reasonable.
"It's 9AM on a Monday, the fuck was the client thinking?"
It's not uncommon. We knew well in advance and all of the prep work was meant to be done on Friday so it could be toggled on in an instant. It's now being revealed that my favourite pleb made a pigs ear of it, but it's not even his fault - the work should never have been delegated to him.
I refuse to launch anything first thing Monday because if/when it goes tits up, you've ruined your whole week.
Just emailed the MD asking for crunch talks sooner rather than later.
Might need to start reducing my internet package to dial up soon.
I have my 2 interviews this week. One of which I have to drive to fucking Ashford for, despite the job being in Dagenham. The other in Dartford. Fantastic time to come down with a cold. I’ll still be a snotty mess for Wednesdays ordeal, but I should be getting better for Fridays and that would be my preference anyway.
I was working in Ashford today. Probably a different one though.
I've had it with Cork accents now. They could be ordering their dinner for all I know.
The person I like working with best is pregnant. :cry: She’s due in November and having a whole goddamn year off. I need a new job by November at the very latest. Not good.
It wouldn’t be so bad because a lot of the locums are okay and we get early finishes, but the other full-time employed person I work with is the worst person in the world. I can’t bear more days with her. Oh god.
In today's episode, Baz impregnates a teenage colleague and immediately feels the need to leave.
Dunno, just anyone whose address ends with Co Cork, Kerry or Limerick seems to talk like they're straight off the back of 30 pints. Most of them probably are.
There's also a cluster of accents somewhere in NI that sound like they're in the middle of having a stroke.
What I will say for Ireland, and this is a fact that not enough people know, is that you have the best postmen in the world and it's not even close. Streets ahead of anyone. If you sent a parcel to Ireland with 'you know, that guy' on it, it would probably get there by 7am the next morning.
You should just have them call you Jimmy in the office, Floyd. Doesn't seem like a tough sell.
If only there was some way to talk things through and clarify misunderstandings. Bear in mind until your contract is changed then you're doing the job you were hired to do...
Why don't you have some alpha/beta deployment pipeline sorted to ensure that the change is tested in dev beforehand?
;-)
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I've had a good week this week. I've managed to try my hand at a few new things and the current acting head chef is pretty decent in putting up with my mistakes which has stopped me flapping from time to time.
I really wish I continued writing about it all to be honest. It's fascinating at times watching how others work. I find the 'calmer' chefs more to my liking. 9-12 will always be the most important time of the day. No more will I think I can make something to order without seeking confirmation either. :moop:
Have that tooth crushing phone call about my PERSONAL TERMS later today. Tears.
I hope you didn't spend your 100% raise already.
LOL this is ridiculous. Keeping a good basic was a no goer which is disappointing, but I'll be keeping my basic and commission until there's a big overlap then it;ll begin to reduce. I however will be in a good bargaining position because I can argue I do what I do and also do what they wanted me to do, therefore proving I'm more valuable.
There's no limit on commission either.
There's a target of X amount of new customers, and this is a multiplier to see if you get 100% (or less/more) of the kickers if you come under or go over that.
I'm unclear from reading that, but does that mean your take-home will at least stay the same?
So not a total disaster then, but not the massive payrise you were expecting. Could be worse. If I were you, I'd seriously start looking at other jobs.
I was rooting for you Magic.
So when your commission is consistently greater than the potential reduction in your wage, they'll reduce your wage? That sounds like a bad deal.
"Oh you're performing well? Congratulations, have a pay cut as a reward."
Yeah, absolutely fuck that.
This is it, and I think it's open for discussion at that point when I can prove I can do both the technical piece and the sales piece. Hard to justify at the moment because I haven't sold anything and it could be a disaster.
I'd even take a commission reduction to keep my basic.
Are there many other opportunities in your field in your area? Because I would be seriously looking elsewhere. Sounds like an absolute shitshow.
@SvN, you have PM.
No. It was strange to hear 'you have the full backing of the board and me and the old man (owner and MD) think it's the best idea we've never had'...but lol 25k.
As I said, I think once I can prove I can do it I'll be in a better position. That also said, if I'm bringing in 70k will I care?
That said, I did say I will double my wage in a year, if it drops then it's easier. :eyemouth:
Not sure I like the idea of losing an engineer to a salesperson. Sort it out.
At least you're not going into accounting.
Leave it to a Scotsman to sell a pay cut as a reward. Outstanding.
I got a promotion yesterday which means a pay rise of about 10%. I mean I'm still not exactly raking it in but a lot of the stuff I'll be doing is stuff I've been doing anyway so it's nice to get some more for it
They clearly don't value me highly enough for that.
Had my interview today (fucked off the one on Wednesday) and it went well. The interviewer wanted me to meet someone today but he was in a meeting so chances are I will have to go back for another one. Annoying to say the least, with their current gaff an hour and a half drive away.
GPDR is doing my nut.
I love sending off things to our copy editor and getting back design ideas. Stay in your lane fuck boy. Correct the typos and get back in your box.
We did some logo concepts for a client we have on retainer a few weeks ago. We sent them over as a PDF presentation and he said he liked the one on the cover. There wasn't one on the cover, so I was a bit confused, and asked if he meant the first one.
No, he literally meant the company named spelled out in a font on the title page.
:D how much is that costing them?
They pay us £3k per month so it just comes out of that.
‘Kin ‘ell
I hope it was Comic Sans.
2nd interview tomorrow at 2pm. Another 4 hour round trip. /o\
Sweet. You can get two practice runs in.
Are you going to do a 4 hour round trip every day if you get it?
That's better than the interviews I had with Tesco Bank that were conducted in a hotel because their office wasn't finished.
One of our marketing team told me the other day that rounded corners were "better".
They same guy also asked me to get our devs to make a fresh deployment because we had hyperlinked too much of a sentence. I literally just sent this back as my reply.
Marketing people are cunts but if done well it's invaluable.
You should write a book with pearls like that, m8.
#thoughtleader
#bluesky
Rounded corners are better tbf.
Called in sick and I've spent the last half an hour watching clips of Pete Burns on celebrity big brother. What a fucking guy.
Is there anything better than when you're worried about hitting a deadline and the boss walks in and goes 'I've got an off-site meeting, can we move that to tomorrow?'
Got the job and pretty sure I’m going to have to turn it down. It was advertised as shifts between 8-8 but they told me today it’s actually 9-5, which leaves me hitting rush hour in both directions every day, so I’d have to leave before she got up and get home after she went to bed.
I’m not being a weekend dad, so unless they can be flexible they can stick it and my feedback will be pretty shitty. If you don’t advertise your correct working hours, how can you expect people to make an informed decision when applying.
My car is being rebranded tomorrow and was asked what time I’d like to go in so only getting there for 9, and then the [pregnant] person I’m working with has an appointment at 9:45 so not really gonna start Work will about 10:30 tomorrow. And we always call it a day at 4:30, so tomorrow’s a proper skive.
And then working on my own on Wednesday so can get home nice and early and start to get excited about the game.
My job is completely fucked and there is nothing that can fix it.
I'm currently trying to understand what the fuck fracking is all about.
Probs find out if I still have a job this week too. Third time I've had that conversation in 4 years. Sweet job security.
I mean, we probably both blame David Cameron to some degree ...
Bit underwhelmed by my CAREER CHANGE at the moment. Nothing has changed, we still have no info and the cunt head of sales, apart from offering an initial meeting (which we couldn't attend due to existing commitments) hasn't even acknowledged it, apart from a pathetic two sentence 'ANNOUNCEMENT' on YAMMER that was quite frankly embarrassing and produced a ton of questions.
So...that was 10 working days ago...and here we are. The good news is I guess they are now recruiting for our replacements. Sigh.
EDIT: It wasn't even an announcement because the dim, selfish cunt doesn't know how to use it, he merely posted it as a comment under Sales. TWAT.
Oh Jesus, fucking Yammer. The latest in our conveyor belt of Lync, Skype for Business, Slack, Pidgin and all the other bollocks the department have pushed in the hope it will get IT people synergising up the social flagpole.
I get an email every Sunday from Yammer but I’ve no idea what it is. Some corporate bullshit? I’m so far down the ladder I swear it’s not intended for me.
We've had yammer for about 18 months maybe. I've ignored it for 18 months.
I tried to get us using Slack or the G Suite version of Hangouts in work but they're still woefully old fashioned. Three of the eight of them can't even get their email syncing on their phones.
I lied about not being able to sync my email to my phone for 18 months.
We have a fake facebook nobody uses. Second day on the phones has gone alright. Being on the late shift, we only do it for a few hours before .... y'know, doing the stuff we're actually paid for. And most of the time nobody picks up.
The Koreans had their own one of those things called tok tok or something. Absolutely dire. Head office wanted you to use it, in the same way 20 years ago they wanted fridges to know when you were low on bread, but it didn't catch on.
Anyway, some nice DRAMA at work of late. When I was hired in February, I replaced (and initially shadowed) a guy (let's call him Derek) who had more specialist engine knowledge, but had been planted in Sales for a few months until an opening came up in R&D. So this happens, he swans off to the other side of the building to join R&D, I replace him in Sales, and everyone's happy. Or are they? Two weeks ago, he starts a prolonged bout of absence, first of all with his daughter supposedly being sick, and then with he himself being sick for the whole of last week. On Friday, whispers begin around my colleagues, I tag that something is going on regarding my predecessor, and then on the way out of work I spot him lurking in the car park in his Clio.
Sure enough, this morning an email comes round from the boss saying simply 'Please note that Derek is no longer employed by the company.' One sentence. No one says anything, so I just shrug and carry on, before on the way out at 5, my nearest colleague says 'Did you know what was going on with Derek?' I said no, and he says 'I'm not at liberty to say, but he was pushed.'
Can't get my head around how you start a new job internally, go off sick for 10 days, and then seemingly get fired.
Potentially exciting development, Jimmy. One of the guys I know over in another corner of the internet had a bizarre, hastily arranged interview with a Korean woman. I'm crossing my fingers that it's for your old haunt.
The ASDA/Sainsburys merge has everyone seething in the store where I work.
Work is great the moment. Got my trainee taking a load of my lessons, so I either sit in the room and mark books or formally observe (once a week) or go and sit in the office across the corridor and work. I'm so productive at the moment that I don't feel like a constant bag of stress. Which is nice.
So, Jimmy’s getting murdered then. Chin up Magic, could be worse.
Some recruiter gimp was trying to sell me a job in Newbury yesterday. The company actually sounded alright and quite interesting but when I actually looked into the possible commute from London I realised it would be a fucking nightmare. I emailed him today to tell him not to bother (in a very civil and apologetic manner) and he never bothered replying. Huffy little twat.
A recruiter once refused to put me forward for a job with a company who do unexploded ordnance surveys because the job advert listed a 'degree in History (preferably Military History)' as one of the requirements.
Yeah, most of them are pretty thick too.
Hateful day today in my absolute least favourite customer. Already drove 2 hours to be here for their induction that has to be done every 2 months and I guarantee with all the other red tape and bullshit I won't do anything resembling the actual job til at least 11am.
Booked today and tomorrow off :drool:
It was every bit as shit as I expected, and a whole lot more. They've a new upstart.
Had an eleven year old tell my trainee that she 'had aids' and should 'go and fucking kill herself' yesterday. Kids got problems but fuck me. Another kid - "are you going to cry, miss?". Jokes on him though as he fucking bawled his eyes out when his head of year bollocked him. Aids kid has a days exclusion. I might live in a bubble but I've never had a kid speak to me like that before.
Recruitment as an industry is on borrowed time, I reckon. Surely there's a better way?
I have never had a positive encounter with an agency. Seemingly the only skills required for the job are being self confident whilst also being a bit thick.
On the contrary, I'd probably have been unemployed a lot longer (Christ!) if it wasn't for agencies. All but one of my jobs have come from them.
One week down on the phones. It's not as bad as I was expecting. Most of the people that do pick up take the appointments we offer and, at the end of it all, we're not pushing them to accept it. Meanwhile, our backlog has exploded. :moop:
Got some phone interview tomorrow. No idea what to expect other than it'll last about half an hour.
Already sick of pulling double duty. Such a stupid call by management to pull dozens off our work to handle phone calls all day. And then to apparently solve our backlog with a bunch of already overworked guys in Glasgow. Restructuring the benefits system is the worst legacy this government will have.
Got the new John Deere parts catalogue today. Best day of my professional life.
Nightmare few days. I made the mistake of checking emails over the long weekend which had me feeling suicidal yesterday.
I've to go to Bulgaria next month for 2 days but the bossman paying for the Mrs and an extra 3 days. Tidy.
I spent a whole day video editing and then at 17:45 it crashed and corrupted the project. Now I have to go in on my day off.
I feel like a tit if I lose an hour's progress in a game due to not having saved. You must feel like a howling arsehole.
I'm going to assume if it's been a whole day then the program didn't have a save button. Hopefully that's the reason at least.
In my final year at Uni I emailed myself an essay I’d been working on at home, so I could work on it at the Library. 3 hours work. Hit save, rather than save as and lost the fucking lot. I could have Columbined the place.
I didn't realize 'corrupted the project' was such a high level term. A bunch of updates for CC went out recently so I guess I'll have to turn rolling saves back on which is a bit tedious.
I've had a PSD corrupt once when Photoshop crashed when it was saving. Lost about 6 hours of design work that had to be done by the end of the day.
I now work within a Dropbox folder so I can restore older versions if needed.
He emailed me ten minutes before saying he was stuck in a meeting and asked to reschedule. :moop:
That recruiter that tried to sell me the job in Newbury came back to me yesterday with something actually in London. It's consulting though, not sure I'm keen on the idea.
I don't know how you could put up with London. Stick to Newbury.
At least I know some people in London. I'd probably just develop an in-person gambling addiction if I lived in Newbury.
You could come on a meet then.
I deployed an enterprise WiFi solution at work, replacing some ancient Apple Airports.
Now it's transpired the guest network has kept disconnecting clients and not one cunt said a thing to me, but have been bitching about it not working. Arseholes.
I received a phone call in work yesterday which sounded iffy at first. Someone from Gabon wanted to speak to me. Not knowing anyone from Gabon I assumed it was a cold call and prepared to unleash a volley of abuse for calling me at work....
Until it turned out to be nothing of the sort. The new lass just mispronounced our head office. Anyways...much to my surprise, I've been recognised as a "Star of the future" and offered a place on a course to complete an Apprentice Standard Chef de Partie Level 3 (equivalent 2 x A Levels). The whole thing has overwhelmed me if I'm honest, just the pdf telling me what to expect has given me nightmares.
We meet in Monday at 9am and I'm nervous to fuck.
It's a good thing they never saw your 'Cooking with Tim' video.
I thought that was a Giggles post at first and was about to claim that there was no fucking way he would ever be declared the Chef De Party Star Of The Future without knocking someone out.
You say that but one of the people tomorrow has seen it already and he's a chef/director. He helped out over a tricky Christmas period.
I am legit worried though because I don't really know what I'm meant to say or why it warrants meeting up.
If it's in work time, go for it.
Don't believe them if they say there's a pidgeon in your bank account.
Ps congrats.
No word as yet whether I'm getting made redundant or not. About 20 folk have already been pulled into some project so there's chaos as team leads try to understand what's going on and how to manage without what they have.
I can't really process it and in my mind it seems too much too soon given where I feel I'm at personally. At this stage of my 'career'. I've barely even learned the basics.
Genuinely good luck. :)
Where's your head office, Smiff?
Ghana
Should have got a WiFi extender. It’s a great WiFi Solution.
Most people won't need one, just need to fix their existing shitty wifi, adding an extender in to a bad mix just exacerbates the issues. RIP.
Fix how? Just sorting out the channel selection?
Power ratios bands etc.
Also the wifi is working perfectly but only iphones keep dropping. Lawl.
I was going through my galary on my phone.
:-D
Toggle Spoiler
I'm still bricking Monday mornings meeting. I haven't got a clue what I'm meant to say.
Top job, Baz.
Mobile is shit for this site.
I think 13 seconds to 17 seconds could go viral. Properly hypnotic.
I absolutely smashed the interview/meeting yesterday. :eek:
There are 4 positions to fill and 6 of us have been selected so we'll see in the next few days. I definitely surprised the one I didn't know which was nice.
Anyone ever made a completely different career change?
I'm in a workshop for an oil company repairing rig equipment, been there ten years and I'm really getting sick of the actual physical work now. Wouldn't want to go to another workshop but then that leaves options thin on the ground given it's all I've done.
Just sick of the shit and want to escape it, the derisory £900 pay rise after a 4 year pay freeze is just the cherry on the cake- although that wasn't as bad as the 1% quite a few got, ~£300.
Go into buying/selling for the same stuff. You can sit down all day, and I never realised flogging camshaft bushing to desperate mariners would be so much fun.
:harold:
Spent yesterday afternoon checking out our leaving process. I'm going to be stuck doing calls for most of my day so I'm out.
Handing in my notice tomorrow :groove:
I've made the decision today that shithead has to go. I've been closely monitoring his work this week and he's basically done fuck all. He's given vague excuses about how he's been working on other things, but I know for a fact he's full of shit. I asked my guy in the office and he said he seems to have spent most of the day texting on his phone.
I'm going to wait few weeks to get an existing project completed and then give him the boot.
We find out on Tuesday what the company re org is going to look like. A good 7,000 people finding out what roles there are and then a couple of weeks of uncertainty wondering whether you're a dot on the org chart or locked out the office with your badge deactivated.
Is he a dev or a designer? @SvN
He's a front end developer.
Walking out of work knowing you're not back in for two weeks is just the best.
A head of year job has come up, which I might go for.
A whole day of GDPR training this week, can't wait.
It's rancid. We only had to watch an hour long video.
We've got a 113-slide presentation/lecture, with an exam to follow although it's not clear whether we actually need to pass it or what it's for. Worst part is the first slide which reads 'introductions'
Bloody hell. We have a ten-minute phone conference and then a nightmare training module.
Not the "Hey, here's a very obvious thing that's happening. Is that against data protection?" but more, "Here's some bollocks about legislation. Use said bollocks to match bollocks to other bollocks."
Go a couple of job interviews coming up - one this week and one next week. For 'proper' jobs that I'd actually like to get. Shitting meself.
What are they?
Software development jobs.
Perhaps I'll stream it live on TTH.
First interview down. I think it went alright.
They've offered me the job.
Well done, how do you feel about the job itself?
It seems alright. I feel like I can't really afford to be all that picky about my first dev job though. I dunno.
They want me to start ASAP and defer my final MSc project to part time and will give me study leave to complete it. I kinda wanted to get it over and done with and start in September but it's nice they're offering study leave.
My mate (also a developer but self taught) is telling me I should push for more money too.
Boyd. :cool:
The job title is 'Junior Java Engineer'.
Hi, team.
Yeah, nice one :)
And an engineering position no less. Holy hell.
Nice one, Boyd. Where is it?
Congrats Boyd.
On a more disappointing note I'm getting a letter tomorrow telling me I'm in scope for a re-organisation and more than likely will have a new job, or none at all. Two months after getting first told a re-organisation was happening we had a 'townhall' today which raised more questions than answers and didn't actually tell us what the organisation will look like.
Terrible day. A career limiting day too, more than likely. Everything I've heard sounds like I'm in the wrong part of the business.
Lol Irish me here but is that Laaandan or is there actually a place called Lahdahn?
It's London.
:D
Just checking.
It’s Londonderry, they just shorten it to London because they love it.
Nice one Boydy. Are you going to accept or hold on to have the other interview?
The cuntish thing to do would to be accept and attend the other interview anyway.
After thinking I'd turned a corner with the call centre stuff, my new manager in waiting has decided I can desk share with someone who works 12 hour shifts. I work full time. He looked at that, smiled and left for two weeks. :moop:
Nice one Boyd :thbup:
Feel free to PM me if you want some info on London salaries/locations etc.
I’m off today and it’s the first of six, then I’m in for three days and then off for two weeks. :drool:
Yeah I'd be careful about the wage thing, establish yourself first. If they don't recognise move on you'll be in a much stronger position to negotiate if you're in a decent job already (You can lie about your current basic).
Probably won't do that as I hate interviews. The fewer I have to go to the better.
I want to know how much the other one pays though. Its advert just said 'competitive' when I applied. Hate that.
Might just email them and ask.
Did an MSc Software Development at Queen's in Belfast. Well, still doing. Haven't done my final project yet.
Cheers.
In my experience, "competitive" means "as little as we think we can get away with".
Develop a solution to it big man.
Do you want me to phonics the board?
Make us phonics-proof for your final project.
The guy from next week's place replied. He says it's dependent on experience and gave me their range. The salary offered in the one from yesterday is near the top of that range and the amount I was gonna ask for is the top of that range.
I should just take the one I've been offered already, shouldn't I?
Probably. As your professional experience is close to zero (from what I can gather), it sounds like you won't get near the salary you want.
Yeah, that's what I imagine. They'd just say I've got no experience and stick me on the bottom end of their scale. Which is fair enough but I'd be stupid to take that if I've got a better offer elsewhere.
Got them to up the money so I've accepted it.
Woo, big boy job.
Boyd's clear alpha in these last two pages is making me suicidal.
Well in Boydy
Learned all about GDPR in a course today and did the exam in 20 minutes, now I can barely remember what the G stands for.
Boydy are you doing any RPA?
Will I be in this job? I don't think so, no.
To be sure.
Edit: anything you're looking to learn?
Well in Boydy.
Yeah just wanted to say congrats Boydy. I feel this weird sort of pride that you've found something, taught it to yourself and made a career from it :cool: Seriously, well done. Stick it out, after a few months it'll start to seem like an absolute chore but the learning on the job nature of it will be invaluable. Now you're in this world, never give up, just move somewhere else if it gets bad. You're in an area that has more good jobs than good people. Take advantage of it.
Nice one Boyd :youpi:
Corporate Boyd :cool:
Thanks everyone. :)
Absolute chaos today. Dozens of clients suddenly realising they need to make changes to be GDPR compliant and panicking that it needs to be done today. There's pretty much zero chance they're all going to get done today, which no doubt will piss them off - but fuck me, this deadline has been known for over a year, and we've emailed everyone about it 3 times.
We were told that you don't even have to have everything in place by tomorrow, just be able to show that you're taking steps. Everyone's going mad with it.
This was like that MIFID2, been announced for like 3 years and not one cunt did a thing about it.
After the initial excitement of the job offer, I'm starting to have second thoughts about moving to London. :worried:
Don't blow all this goodwill you've built up, dickhead. If you don't like London you look elsewhere later on.
:D
That's what I was expecting.
Just feel like I need to put my thoughts down to help me sort it out in my mind though.
Would it be your first time moving that far? And if so is the concern that it's London or just moving in general?
Just go for it Steve for fuck's sake. Bite the bullet for once in your pathetic life.
He's just pulling out because they've asked for his email address and he doesn't want to embarrass himself.
Imagine graduating from Oxbridge only to go on to bottle every opportunity you encounter.
He doesn't want to leave GS in the lurch with bills and having to find a new housemate.
Not moving to London is always a very good idea.
I can’t think of a time that you’d ever have to live in London. Unless it’s a job where you need to be able to report in within 30 minutes of an emergency or something. In the likely event that Boyd isn’t joining the emergency services; just live somewhere nice and commute.
What Spikey said.
London is a shithole.
Ballymena’s lovely.
And we can invite him to the group.
If you do have any London questions, feel free to drop me a PM @Boydy.
My best mate and his wife (also a good friend) are having a kid soon so not sure how much I'd actually see them. Another mate currently has a spare room in his flat but when I asked him about moving in, he got a bit weird about it. He can be a bit weird at times anyway and first mate said he seems to like his privacy or whatever. I did tell him he could say no and I wouldn't be offended anyway. But I'll probably end up living with randomers. Another couple of friends are a couple and having a kid soon too so probably won't see them much. And then another good friend who's got a software development job recently too and will be working quite near me so I can probably see him pretty often.
Mate with the spare room always seems a bit miserable and lonely though and I kinda fear ending up like him.
The expense is a bit of a concern too. I'll be getting paid enough to have a decent standard of living but if I was to get a similar job in Belfast at the wage levels here, my standard of living wouldn't really be that different. And getting my own place/buying somewhere would actually be a possibility here in the near future.
Also commuting in and out of central London is gonna be a bitch.
And as an only child, I always worry a bit about if something happens one of my parents and how the other one would cope. One way round, they'd be okay, the other way round, not so much.
I think that's all of my worries.
In respect to your mates that are having kids - you could move in next door and barely see them.
:D
I don't know what that means.
Also, I had a dream the other night where I went to start the job and some guy who looked like Jurgen Klopp seemed to run the place and made everyone dance some sort of weird company dance. And part of the office was the old set of the Teletubbies.
Don't worry Boyd you can get MDMA just as easily in London.
Coke. You do coke in London.
Its probably because I’ve never lived anywhere busy, but I’d love to live in London.
My mate did it for a bit cos his fiancé was on work placement and he managed to transfer branches of foot asylum he manages so it all worked great, and he seemed to go for drinks most nights of the week - but somehow didn’t enjoy it and was glad to come back and live in warrington. :cab:
To be fair there were at least two major terrier (edit: lol) attacks while he was there, but surely that’s all part of the excitement.
London is awful and getting worse. Baz would last about ten minutes there with that sincerity of his. You have to be a vile cunt to prosper.
I live outside rather than in it, which is a key distinction. Here we have people who work with their hands, trees/grass, and public transport is shit. It's a happy medium.
I lived there between about 9 and 4 years ago, and it's probably twice as crowded/awful now as it was in that era.
Yeah, 'suburban St Helens', distinct from its the bustling central metropolis.
I live in it and it's fine. I mean what is living in it anyway? Working day eg being around Bank is busy but fine. Evening I'm near Finsbury Park and jihad hasn't happened yet - it's quiet most of the time but you're a stones throw from civilisation.
You don't stay lonely in London long.
Well if you want to be you can.
Also south London is better than north, something most don't realise until it's too late.
I just like regular people and you and Raoul as examples doesn't paint a wonderful picture.
Uh, ok - welcome to your 30s. Everyone who's settled down is married/pregnant/has kids. In terms of finding new people to hang out wit, like most people in London you'll start with house/workmates, meet people via friends-of-friends/tech meet ups etc. and build your social circle that way. I wouldn't live with someone you already know - the point is to meet new people.
If you want to earn some decent money, stick it out for a few years then move back to Norn Iron then that's totally feasible too, and you can always move further out of London and commute in if you want more space/greenery. Commuting really isn't that much of a bother. Most tech places are fairly flexible about working from home occasionally too.
Personally I think you're a lunatic if you consider passing on an opportunity to move somewhere awesome and get into an industry which offers great opportunities for developing skills and earning a significant wage. Get into some stuff like AI/ML/Data Science/FinTech and you can earn bonkers money.
Is it not the same situation with people you know back home? It’s just what happens when you’re late 20’s.
Do they not tell them about the birds and the bees over there? First GS, now this.
Okay, I hate this job again. We're not trained to deal with when a claimant goes dark. Likewise if a lad your ringing is constantly stimming or being attacked by imaginary bees during the call.
Commuting :sick:
Tech meetups :sick:
Oh, no doubt you should go there. I moaned earlier but it's better than Ballykissangel.
Yeah. Allowing Mexicans in polite society. :nono:
@Boydy you absolute lad. i'll come and have a pint with you ya lil scamp
oh you're bottling it, shoulda remembered to read the whole thread, no pint for you dickhead
The longer people continue to think that (public transport is overrated), the longer proper people can have the south to themselves. I'm going to south Croydon tomorrow and I can't wait.
East is where it's at. It's actually living in London, rather than just sorta near it.
Oh god, don't start me on the east. Come back north, all is forgiven.
I get to see Tarquin and Dave go to the Arsenal every week. It's proper.
You could just have no friends Boyd.
He has us.
Just been in the chips thread and been reminded of another argument against London - no fucking gravy.
You know you have to go. The moaning opportunities that place will give you can't be beat.
Dave as one of those 'straight acting' gays who wears football like a beard. It all makes sense.
It's nice to see it opening up now, can't be long until all the works are done.
You're mind is fucked. I'm talking about Dundee.
Disgustingly quiet day, so after my carpets were fitted I powerwashed the decking and went to the skip a few times. Treating it like a real public holiday. :drool:
Now sunbathing down at me dads.
Did some calculations the other day and after rent, bills and travel, I'd have £100 more a month in Belfast on 20k than in London on 30k.
Still can't make my mind up.
Which city do you prefer? Would you miss that £100pm?
In 5 years time you'd still be on £20k in Belfast, but £50k in London
If you don't take it, you're a disgrace. Rather moan about life than do something about it. You'll be coming in on the bottom of the rung, you can get a raise ffs.
Not entirely sure. I actually quite like Belfast these days so not as desperate to leave NI as I used to be. Dunno if I'd miss it but I just thought it was interesting as the idea of London is usually jobs and money.
Also, I was being conservative with the 20k job comparison. Would hope to be on slightly more here.
What?
30,000 is 10,000 more than 20,000 so nearly £1000 more per month. If you don’t take tax and living expenses in to account like a massive idiot, that is.
This self destruction is making me more positive by the minute. He'll bottle it and his mum will have to sue him so he moves out.
You should take a punt on it. You can always go home or find something else if it's shit or someone chucks acid at you.
Yeah as much as I'd say avoid London, you always regret stuff you didn't do more than things you did do even if they turn out shit.
For what it’s worth (probably not a lot) I think you should go for it.
I had to turn down a higher paying job because of my responsibilities at home not long ago. It was a better job, but the commute meant that I’d be fuck all help at home and as a consequence I’m feeling pretty stuck where I am.
You’re single with pretty much nothing holding you back. Go to London, give it a year. If you don’t like it, leave and move back home with a years experience in ‘that London’ to your name.
Can you enhance your skills in Belfast that would give you a better punt at what you want to do long term in London? Or is the £100/month sacrifice in the short term a lever to bigger and better opportunities in London, Belfast or anywhere?
I'd personally love to leave Aberdeen but if I moved to London I'd be taking a pay cut and it wouldn't necessarily help what I'm looking to do.
Do you want to chase a career? Or you happy to be comfortable? Sounds like that's your battle.
Another thing I've been thinking is I would really rather finish my project and get the MSc over and done with by September and then start work rather than having to do it on a part time basis for next April. Coding all week at work then coming home to do more for my project on evenings/weekends. If I was to turn this down now, even if I couldn't manage to get a job in Belfast after I've finished, what's to stop me getting a different job in London then? I've got one already, it shouldn't be that hard to get another.
Don't want to sound like a big-headed twat but I'm pretty sure I smashed that interview. They told me I was the first person they'd seen that was able to answer one of their theory questions and they offered me the job about an hour after the interview.
Also, the guys who interviewed me seemed slightly weird and the office was really quiet.
He’s bottled it lads. No going back now.
Someone tell GS the good news.
Yeah, stay and finish your project. Tell GS to start posting again as well.
An MSc project should take like five hours to finish you waster.
It is a bit of a joke, to be honest. But it got me a job so that's all that matters.
I passed all the checks for a job I was offered in November, and they e-mailed me today asking when I wanted to start. I could move tomorrow if I really had to, but what would you normally allow someone to move across the country?
:cool:
Will you be an engineer too?
I'd give yourself a month or so to find a place and stuff.
If you're working for GCHQ, will you be Snowden to my Greenwald?
It's nothing like that. And yes of course I'll be an engineer.
You have no responsibility at all so I'd give you 2 weeks.
Engineering Team:
In
- Boydy
- Lewis
Out
- Magic
What a transfer window we've had so far. :drool:
In:
Sigurdson
Rooney
Out:
Lukaku
Anyway who else is in #TEAMSALES?
Also I will accept technical consultants, pre-sales consultat and sales engineers™.
*crickets*
Jimmy yes, telesales but I'll give you that and it's a good free transfer for us.
On paper we're not a great side but I think with good tactics and organisation we can get good results.
I must clarify though that I am not in fucking telesales.
What the fuck is a sales engineer? :D
We had one at the Koreans. It's basically a nerd who spends his life getting pissed in cheap hotels.
Customer Service Technician, it is.
I think I've got Maz and Adamski in my crew.
We're like an early 2000's West Ham team stuffed full of weird regens :cool:
Me and Shinners repping team demoralised Civil Servant.
In news that will undoubtedly make people seethe: as I'm on my notice period and have finished my handover stuff, my place has put me on gardening leave, which combined with my remaining holiday means I essentially have the whole of June off, paid.
:drool:
Similar role (bit of a step up) but different industry.
Am I the only student left?
Engineer.
And it's in Portsmouth.
Isn't Mahow also a student of sorts?
Spoons and 'how donning it together in a frat party. :drool:
Spoon. :D
I'm still waiting to see if I passed the interview. I got an email saying it'll be early this week but I had nothing so I texted to ask if I missed out. I haven't and I'm still 'very much in our thoughts'.
I don't really know what I'm meant to do other than wait.
Just a few hours to go and then off for two weeks. :alan:
That's blinding from Spoon :D
Still can't believe you guys deleted my Jobs thread like this.
Another three been sacked. Manager and two of her staff. :drool:
Our ‘modernisation’ is on hold because of ‘budget constraints’. They haven’t even awarded the contract to develop this newfangled system they promised yet, and that was meant to be sorted in January. Ideally this all drags on until my next kid goes to school, then I can work normal hours again and leave for a better job. As things stand I’m stuck because no other cunts will honour my hours.
I'm off today and bored off my hole already.
I've no computer games except The Golf Club 2 and PES2018 which are both shite, or Virtual Pool 4 which I'd need to set myself up at the desk to play with the mouse. Don't think I could bring myself to sitting at a desk on my day off.
Going to service the lawnmower now which should kill half an hour.
I'm working. Plan to paint the decking today.
I'm done but can't mow yet as the air filter is taking an age to dry.
I fucking hate decking.
Even managed to get the car washed and return something to screwfix on the way home from the doctors. What a day I’m having.
Fuck it. Off licence and a chicken fillet roll.
LOL so we've just replaced all the fuel cards. But instead of having them overrun by 2 weeks or whatever they've let them expire and there has been a delay in the new ones.
So that means we're all paying with our own money and having to claim it back.
Not only that, we can only fill up at Tesco with the new ones or Texaco. Hint: there's no TEXACO's in Scotland.
Again, we're definitely not cost-cutting.
Here.
http://www.erouteonline.com/v7/fastfueluk/
UK Fuels also accept it as far as I can see from this, and the website also says Tesco and Morrisons.
There's a search of a 40km radius of Dundee.
http://i65.tinypic.com/2s8mds5.png
I don't know if it's a FastFuel one or not. Will find out when I get it hopefully this year.
That's what Texaco brand theirs as anyway as far as I've seen.
I still wouldn't drive as much as a mile if it was coming out of my pocket. Claiming back or not.
I’m going on a 2 day course next week and have to claim my petrol money back after the fact. 40p per mile though. :drool:
Internet is down again. At least it's Friday.
I have to pay and claim back. :thbdn: 9p a mile
I don't even have to log the reg or mileage on mine when I use it. Get to go all over the country to more matches than ever because I don't ever have to buy fuel and it'll be coming with me on holidays to England too.
Bloody glorious in Aberdeen today and I'm off. Climbed a hill this morning and now cutting about town just getting some sun.
Really need to buy a house with a garden, assuming I don't get punted in this re org.
I'll give you one of mine.
http://i65.tinypic.com/30i7q4y.jpg
Trampoline.
I bet you have a fish tank as well.
No.
And FFS there's a fucking thunderstorm on it's way.
I thought there was meant to be DANGER TO LIFE STORMS over the last couple of days? It's been mid 20s here with 65+ humidity.
It looked like it was darn sarf and THE WEST that were getting it and now this cunt super storm appears out of nowhere? Fuck off.
I’ve just pegged a load of towels out so it better not rain.
#dadmin
EDIT pissed it down, they're in the tumble dryer.
It's missed us. :drool:
Just got my rota through for my first 4 months (provided I pass my resits...). No nights :drool: Being a special case has it's advantages occasionally.
Also get paid more than I expected.
I start my engineer job on the eighteenth, and I don't know what the pay is (or what the hours are, or exactly what I'm doing). I'm going to live in my brother's empty house until I find somewhere to live though, so I will finally be living alone. :drool:
Don’t do a Harold on us.
He seriously must have died.
He’s either snuffed it or he’s doing a life stretch inside. We’ll find out in 15 years for certain.
Every workplace needs at least one.
Those sappy sales cunts couldn’t fit a WiFi Range Extender.
Pretty sure Harold was Tommy Robinson, so he's probably in the slammer getting felt up by nonces now.
I'm telling you, he's been dead for at least a year.
:lol:
Still in Hull?
Harold pre-empted the gammon thing by years with his meat posts.
So has Boydy bottled it?
http://i64.tinypic.com/2f03biv.png
Oh shit. :|
I checked in a while ago and he hadn't touched his fantasy football team after that date either.
We haven't had a davidbr-style message from his grieving family, so there's hope.
In all seriousness he must have died.
And the cunts that wanted him banned are probably responsible.
Unban him. It’s the only true test.
Laid in to the business with the IIP milf today. Therapy.
My wife got told she’s either got to take redundancy or a role in a lower paying job today. We’ve got to find out if they will honour her maternity pay if she takes redundancy, as she’ll not end up with much extra if they don’t. Fuck sake.
It's been pretty intense the past week at work. Project is supposed to be delivering automation and because it's brand new to most people, it's been a constant slog.
The worst may be over but we hit some issues at the end of the day trying to run the thing unattended. Constant kick in the nuts trying to get this right.
Im still off. Today I painted the conservatory ceiling twice and sunbathed a bit.
Hollywood.
He is a fanny but I don’t imaging him to be bald as well.
Well, I like to imagine you leave your jobs 'in the big city' and drive out to the country blaring "Castle on the Hill" the entire way so I'm just going to keep dreaming that if that's okay with everyone.
Like this, basically:
https://i.imgur.com/r4vB3Gb.png
I eat potatoes and drink Guinness every day and own a horse.
Toggle Spoiler
That's because it's a donkey.
They taste the same.
End of terrace.
End of civilisation
So, I laughed at someone's tale of self-harm today. I was reading about a claimant who committed self harm by pouring boiling fat on her feet. I blame TTH for this.
It was entirely down to DavGooner's post prior to Liverpool's triumph in Istanbul. Without knowledge of that specific post, I wouldn't have batted an eyelid.
Maternity will be paid in full in one lump sum so a fairly tidy amount on the way (about 2 years pay). That also frees me up to work normal hours now, so I am starting to apply for jobs again. Only downside is I am having to consider London as I could easily get what we both earn working there. That would mean she wouldn’t have to work until the kids go to school and we could keep her redundancy to do whatever with.
Do it for England.
On the London note, why do employers just put ‘London’ on their job adverts? I’m not going to fucking Fulham every day. I need East London to even think about it.
The same reason West Ham United decided to put 'London' on their badge.
I get that, but ‘East London’ doesn’t detract from that, and it stops Tarquin from Berkshire wasting their time.
My mate sent me his CV. This is the very last part:
:sick:Quote:
Interests
International Travel, Wigan Warriors Season ticket holder, Family Adventures, Fire Breathing, City Breaks, Gaming and Cinema.
Interests should be forbidden from CVs. It's utterly irrelevant.
If it's relevant, it's only for interview ice breaking and small talk.
You can have it on there if it says something relevant about you. I have on mine that I run a cricket club, but not that I enjoy Indian food and the poems of Philip Larkin.
Most people see it as a section to fill out rather than actually having something worthwhile to say. 90% of CVs with it included just list the usual "Socialising with friends, eating out, cinema" crap.
I'm doing an 'informal' talk to a bunch of business owners that form a FEDERATION on Wed. It's supposed to be a high-level informative afterwork chat. It's about telephony. I'm doomed.
I work with a JIRA ticketing system for their requests and I absolutely love when people do this because I allow them the rights to change that status so they can close their own tickets.:
https://i.imgur.com/8Vi1k1W.png
Considering I'm not even going to look at what this request is for another 3 weeks, it is most definitely not in progress.
My last week of dole scummery. Is working shit lads?
Yes.
You will hate it, Lewis.
Lewis will be sacked within weeks after telling his boss how he should actually be doing his job.
You lose time, joy and energy. Gain money and self-respect.
I fail to see how a poxy job will do more for my self-respect than six Best Poster awards.
Work. :sick:
Just got a 5% raise and a snazzy new Job Title. I’ll be carrying on in my current role but will be in and out of the office all day, which will put some noses right out of joint. :drool:
In recent months we've somehow managed to appoint two new Deputy Heads (was one before like most schools, wanted to add one more and just employed both applicants) which left us with no assistant heads (one leaving, other two became deputies). Now bearing in mind we can't afford to employ enough TAs to actually go to lessons to support children who need it (kids have to go to the 6 TAs or whatever we have in the 'Learning Zone') or to pay teachers properly, today they appointed three new assistant heads. Pointless. We're a smaller school than most yet have the biggest Senior Leadership Team.
Still, if I do get an interview for Head of Year, the newly appointed Assistant Head on the panel may sway things in my favour at least.
I have a friend who was a deputy head over here (recently moved to the UK to take a job as a head teacher) and I had absolutely no idea of the layers of bureaucracy that the education system is blighted with.
So much money must be wasted on all that oversight.
It's worse now with academisation - you have executive principals of Multi Academy Trusts (MATs) giving themselves obscene salaries because they can. I work in what seems to be one of the few remaining state schools and it seems to be less greed, but equally as wasteful.
Yeah, he's just gone to some failing school that has been eaten up by a nearby academy with a financial plan to implement.
At the high school he was at over here (probably what would still really be called a secondary modern) there were three assistant heads, one or two deputies, and then a head teacher. This model was largely replicated over the other 3 state schools I believe. Then you have the executive head teacher to oversee them all, and other non-teaching management bods as well. It just seems totally bananas for a place so small.
Insanely busy here. A designer has just been off for 2 weeks on holiday and has a huge amount of work scheduled for today. So of course they've phoned in to say their granddad has died and need the day off.
Hope you gave them a proper yelling.
A guy at our work who was personally very nice but as a colleague was an insufferable, lazy know it all left and has been sacked for telling his new employer who to do their jobs/ run their company inside about six weeks. He also chose to leave on such a date that if he'd hung about an extra week he'd have been looking at about a £600 bonus.
He's the gift that keeps on giving.
I've had seven hours of it, and living alone is the best thing ever. I'm almost in tears, like when Webly realised how much biscuit and milk action he had missed out on over the years. It's too hot here though fucking hell. I've pretty much been living in shorts since 2011, so I'm going to die at work. I'll give it a couple of days until they crack on that I'm indispensable and then see how flexible they are with their smart casual bullshit.
My presentation was applauded. Is that normal?
Living mate. LIVING.
I meant in your job.
The job seems good, but I'm the youngest engineer there by at least twenty years. :moop:
What sort of engineering is it anyway? Real or plugging in things?
Exactly what Magic does, but without the loser non-engineering sales component.
That's a win anyway.
Why didn't I book the morning after England games off. I'm an idiot.
It's happening at the end of today. Just drawing up the termination letter.
I'm going to miss him although he should have gone ages ago.
What was the final straw?
The impending lawsuit. :drool:
Well my plan had been to get through the next project and then let him go. But in truth, that project isn't time sensitive, and the clients have said they're okay waiting for up to a year.
He's been an absolute disgrace over the past month. A catalogue of fuckups, some of which could have been very bad for us if we didn't have someone checking every single thing he did. And today he asked me for a chat, and said he was feeling unmotivated because he hadn't had a review in a while, and he wasn't sure where he stood with the company. Said he'd been a junior developer "for ages" and there didn't seem to be any signs of progression. The sense I got was that he's been after a review to try and negotiate a payrise, hilariously enough. In truth, I'd been intentionally avoiding a review because he was on borrowed time anyway - and couldn't see the point in putting in the effort for someone who was only weeks away from the chop.
Afterwards I sat and realised that it was benefitting noone to string him along any more. If he's not feeling motivated, and I'm unhappy with his performance, we may as well just call it a day. So at half 5, I called him in for a private meeting and did the deed. He took it very well - said he was gutted, he'd loved working here and thanked me. Couldn't have gone better, really.
He has something better lined up already.
Chancers gonna chance.
What are you working on that's going to take up to a year?
You read that wrong. The project won't take a year - it's only about a month's worth of work. But their deadline for going live is in a year, so the pressure's off us, basically.
You won't be hiring Boydy anyway.
https://i.imgur.com/O29gY2e.png
Jimmy thought he had it bad with the Koreans.
I got done for coming in at 8.32 for an 8.30 start three times in a month, I think it was.
Never mind that in the same month I came in earlier than 8.15 about 10-12 times.
Poor bastard only wanted to skip the queue.
From what I can gather here in civil service land you just round things up/down to the nearest hour.
Round down? Civil service?
Yeah, you get in 9:20, you round down to 9:00.
Get in at 825?
Got in at 800. Lovely.
We had 2 minutes grace 3 times a month in my last clocking number. You had to stay an extra 15 mins at the end for the 2 mins though.
I got told off today for cancelling the last call. They can get lost if they think I’m getting home after 5. Boss gave me the “you’re paid til 5:30” spiel but I don’t get a dinner and I left at 8:15. Fuck you.
I do get home most days before 4, but that’s cos I’m efficient. Today they stuck me miles away from home with a really slow person. Frustrating. :yop:
Why would you get a dinner when you finish at half five? :confused:
Went for two internal jobs this week - first one was head of year, where I aced the tasks but fucked the interview, so didn't get it. Today went for a much more junior position though and got that. It's only an extra £50 a month (approx) but it'll hopefully be good experience for when a head of year job comes up again.
I don't because I don't like STEALING FROM THE TAXPAYER.
I'm important mate.
Started getting some stuff through for my new job, including invites to my induction and some IT training shit where they're gonna teach me how to use Office 365 :type:
I'm putting together this photo montage of a Womans HIV Support Group as it's their 25th anniversary or something. The photos are from 1992, there's like 150 people in these photos and only 9 still alive. Feels well morbid.
I thought HIV was (pretty easily) manageable these days?
It is, but that's probably not that useful to people who had it in 1992.
Actually, doesn't that make them a year late? You should do something that shows them who could have come had they done it on time.
3 hour meeting followed by a 2 hour gap into another 2 hour meeting.
Love not getting anything done.
But you still have time to post on here.
I spent 2 hours checking Apple Serial numbers in a cluttered comms room earlier. Fuck you Apple.
Lady coworker: So how do they play the games at the same time? Are they like in different stadiums?
Me with a straight face: Well actually they do it all at once *grabs a piece of paper* basically you have two teams playing this way (draws a normal pitch) and then (draws another pitch making a "+") but the way they film horizontally you don't really notice as much, that's why they're on different channels. You have one camera filming "this way" (first pitch) and one filming "this way" (second pitch)"
Lady coworker: ooooommmggg that makes so much sense
I went on with this bit for another 2-3 minutes before I said:
Me: So you're joking right, you're just going along with the bit because I'm still going along with it, right?
Her: Shut up, are you serious?
[Spoiler: She actually frequents Orlando City MLS games.]
I had a twenty minute kip at my desk today. If I wasn't on such shit money (relatively speaking) I would turn up on GS' doorstep and lol out loud right in his face.
Time thief.
If everyone can toss off for a coffee four times a day then I can have a quick POWER NAP to perk myself up.
You're getting sacked so quickly.
They tried to recruit somebody for my job a year ago (why did I miss that?) but all the candidates were shit. :cool:
You'll be the boss in no time.
3 more people leaving and the projects guy made redundant too. :lol:
Is there anyone left?
Last one out unplug the phones.
Got a 5% pay increase 2 weeks ago, now a 1.5% increase in August.
Making it rain.
Remember that London job that I turned down? (Bottled it, yeah yeah).
I've got two job offers in Belfast now. I feel like the prettiest girl at the dance.
Started interviewing people to replace the pleb I sacked. Had the first one yesterday and it was a waste of time. Absolutely no experience or skills, despite apparently being "really passionate" about the industry and job. A more promising candidate this evening - I hope they're good, the entire process of hiring is so soul destroyingly dull.
90% (maybe more) of people who apply for things seem to be total wastes of time. Not even 'hmm, ok he lacks experience but could be worth a punt'. Just complete irrelevant shite.
That’s people like me though, who would be good if given a chance!
Give me a job
Yeah, I didn't post that I had because it would've been all the usual "BOTTLED IT!" shit.
So here's a new one - a promising applicant has said they live too far away to come in for an interview (1.5 hours) and want a phone interview instead. Is that normal and/or reasonable?
Are they proposing to then commute to the same office every day, or would they move to take the job?
They'd relocate to take the job. If they were based 6 hours away I could understand their reluctance, but it's an hour and a half - some people commute that daily. She's requested the interview by phone due to "train and hotel expenses".
Hotel expenses? You don't need a hotel for a three hour round trip ffs.
I'd tell her she can have an initial interview on skype or whatever but if that goes well she'd need to come in for a proper one in person.
90 minutes is nowt unless they have completely bollocks transport.
She doesn’t want to get the job Just cos she’s flames.
Hire her now, guaranteed babe
I'd say if someone wanted a job they'd travel 1.5 hours to an interview. I certainly would without thinking about it.
I wouldn't go for a job that I had to waste 3 hours of my own time travelling to/from, but if I was I don't think an initial phone interview would be an unreasonable request. It's just as likely that an interview is a waste of time for the candidate as it is for the employer and all you're doing is talking so there's no real difference to doing it on the phone or in person.
Presumably if it's an evening interview they've worked all day and can't hack a 3 hour commute with interview on the back end of it.
Boydys suggestion isn't a bad one. If she's a promising candidate is it worth the hassle of two interviews?
Plenty of people out there. Skip her and on to the next.
Just have the chat over the phone. If she's a knob then you've lost nothing.
Skype it so she can use her webcam.
Speaking of, does the one with the massive tits still work for you? If not, pics.
Had a chat with her and on reflection, I think that perhaps I was perhaps being a bit unfair in my original post. She doesn't drive, and despite it being an hour and 20 minutes away by car, it's almost 4 hours by train with 2 changes. So I get why she was a bit reluctant - who wants to do 8 hours of travelling for a job interview? She's also a recent graduate, and might simply be skint.
I've agreed to meet her for an interview in London, as that's about an hour of travelling for both of us. On paper she's an excellent candidate, probably the best I've had by some distance. So she'll probably turn out to be a nutter or something.
Had an interview yesterday with someone that was fairly good, so I've got a good fallback if this one doesn't work out. I might even hire both and have them battle for the job for 3 months.
Yeah, that’s a bit of a dick move.
It's extremely smart.
He’s just said that the girl is willing to relocate for the job, now he wants to play her off against someone for 3 months to see if she’s worthy. If I were her I’d decline the offer with a flaming bag of shite.
If they both perform well, I'll keep them both on. But it puts me in the position of strength knowing that if one of them isn't pulling their weight, I can let them go without worrying about how long it will take to replace them.
As for relocation, I try and be sympathetic in that regard. The guy I just sacked relocated for the job as well, and I went against my instinct and kept him on for 6-8 months more than I should have hoping he'd turn it around.
Fair enough then. That’s not how it read.
Yeah, if you're willing to keep them both on if they're both good, that's fine. I thought you meant you would definitely be getting rid of one.
I would hire them both, let them battle for the job, make their lives a misery then let them both go the day before their probation. That's what we do. Works well.
So I use this website to verify medical benefits for patients provided by the state government as a part of my job. The website is "home.blahblah.com" for example.
I got a Skype msg from one of the girls I work with asking to verify a patient's benefit.
Normally, I'd open Google Chrome and type "h" "o" and then hit enter as it brings up the website automatically from there.
This time I forgot to click on the actual website, was still in the Skype box, and promptly sent:
Co-Worker: Can you verify this account for me?
Me: Ho
Needless to say I've now panicked and tried explaining the same thing that I just did but haven't received response yet lolol
Ho
Accepted one of the jobs today and let the other one know I was turning them down. They replied saying it was a shame as they really liked me and asked if there was 'anything else we could look at for you?' What does this mean? Can I just ask for a shitload more money or something?
I don't really want to work for them at all. The other one had a far better vibe about it (they even had projector set up in the office for the World Cup games). On the other hand, the one I'm turning down has a pretty bad reputation as a company to work for. To be fair, they're massive and have loads of different departments. But I've heard from actual IRL people who've had relatives/friends etc work there that they don't treat the staff well. And their Glassdoor reviews are terrible. I even brought that up with both the hiring manager and the HR guy. They both tried to explain it away that it's not like that as much any more/it's not like that in the department they're in/those are all just disgruntled former employees etc etc. But it's concerning given how many bad reviews there are. Location-wise it's also terrible - it's in the middle of nowhere whereas the other one is right in Belfast city centre.
Then either say ‘no thanks’ or chance your arm with a massive pay increase.
Hard to believe it's a near 40 year old man writing these posts and not some autistic 19 year old intern.
Who the fuck are you calling nearly 40 you cheeky cunt?
Had a check on my emails as I'm always worried I'll walk into bother after a week off. Shockingly, they're trialing new, reasonable shifts. Still no word on the pay rise. :moop: Doing this after the World Cup seems to be a pisstake as well.
I got lolled at today asking for help sending a fax. Do I look like Gordon Gekko? If we ever get off Windows 7 (which we won't) I'll be the one lolling.
No one should ever get off Windows 7.
One of my French customers always faxes me his purchase orders, scrawled on lined paper. It really is a confusing way of doing things.
We receive faxes too. Can never understand why in this day and age.
Not a thing wrong with Windows 10 either.
We had handy instructions on our fax machines. Very, very rarely used them.
Windows 10 is far superior if you actually know how to use it.
A new guy has started today in another department; we've just had the manager come round and warn us that because he's a practising Muslim, he won't shake hands with women.
Top bombing.
Literally.
That’s not being a Muslim, that’s just being a prick.
New Illustrator update crashes everytime you lock your computer. Good update. Adobe knocking it out of the park as usual.
Just had to come home due to my back being fucked. Asked for painkillers but couldn't give me any due to potential allergies. Cheers, lads, I've got none ya cunts.
Anyone in here live in Birmingham fancy a pint on Tuesday?
I'm normally just heading out now but holidays begin today :)
I'm two nights into a 14 night offshore trip and I'm currently 1 pair of boxers down. Put them in to get washed with the rest of my clothes, they did not return.
Ffs. What kind of shit is that.
First sentence had me assuming you'd shat yourself.
I can't think of anything worse than having to do 14 day stints on an oil rig, even for £850,000 or whatever your salary is.
5 interviews and nowhere further forward. Reposting the job advert today. What a fucking pain in the arse.
Did you not offer the decent pair the job to fight it out? If so, did they see through your plan and reject?
They both fell through for different reasons. The one who is relocating has since revealed that her boyfriend (that she's moving with) has found a job 60 miles away, which is where they're going to relocate to. And she also revealed she has an interview in the same city next week. So there's no way I'm hiring her - she'll clearly be looking to get a job closer to home ASAP, so I'm not going to waste my time.
The other one is just being difficult. I wanted her to do a trial day with us (paid, of course) so she can get an idea of the commute (she lives about an hour away) and we can see how she fits in. She agreed to do it, but couldn't do any of the 8 dates I suggested. She was also taking 2 days to reply to any email, which tells me she's just not that bothered. In the end I just told her to get fucked (in nicer words).
I thought I was working in a pretty happy, laid-back workplace (although I am insulated from much of it), but a few people have been filling me in on the 'poisonous' atmosphere between the management tiers these past couple of days and lol how have people even got the energy?
It really is amazing what wankers worry about.
I love the savagery of it. Office politics are the best.
They're a group of people who spend a lot of time around each other. Factions and grudges are going to develop.
His life and work are basically the same playing field, so it is 'understandable' with him. Plus I don't think these people are necessarily twats away from work. I find it weird anyway.
Just wait till someone steals your milk from the fridge.
I've just applied to be a postman. :cab:
office politics are hilarious at my place, everyone is insane. one of my colleagues went behind my managers back and cornered our manger's manager when she was visiting and told her that one of our colleagues was "fucking incompetent" and that she should have her job instead. incredible. said big boss basically just went wtf and immediately told our manager. ace.
There are worse jobs. I was a postie when I was 19 (13 years ago) and it was a pretty sweet gig. You delivered your round as fast as you could, the rest of the day was yours - if someone was sick you might take out another half a round but get paid overtime for a full round. They've stopped that since and you have a fixed finishing time now (2pm I think) but if you live near your round, nothing to stop you going home for a bit to kill some time (not that I need to tell you how to work as little as possible).
Plus you could pick up extra money by doing collections in the afternoon.
Pro tip: fill out your ‘you weren’t in’ cards in advance so you don’t have to bother knocking and waiting. My local Postie must save about a week a year pulling that shit.
En route to Ipswich and there’s some disgusting fuckers about. How is it possible to be dripping with sweat and stinking of BO at 8:30am. Should have gone by car. :face:
First day. Done nothing so far.
:cool:
I really am fed up with my Irish customers now. It's just a daily Ted and Ralph sketch.
'Are you ever going to pay for this stuff?'
'Oi wouldn't know about daht, sir.'
Well, the trinity of staying put is complete.
- Not doing the thing I don't like.
- More favourable hours next week.
- Payrise worth over a grand.
Unions are great.
Jesus Christ someone who I worked with has topped themselves. Mid 30s two little girls.
^Me in six years if I’m still doing this job.
After my 5% raise for taking on a new role and 1.5% raise due next month, they’re now offering a 3% raise every year for the next 3 years. BUT anyone accepting it will need to sign a new contract. I expect this is an attempt to get at the Pension / reduce holiday / get rid of sick pay / reduce redundancy amounts / all of the above. We shall see.
My last day today before I fly out to the US for a wedding. Absolute mayhem, so much left to get done, phone is ringing off the hook. I doubt I'll actually get any sleep before my flight at 9am tomorrow.
Where's the wedding?
In the US.
Ah ok sorry, should have picked up on that.
It's a small country too.
It's on the East Coast
Of the US.
Thanks, I'll see you there SvN.
Thank you for applying for the role of 93512 - Postman/Postwoman with Driving - Newton Le Willows Delivery Office (WA12 9AA) .
Unfortunately on this particular occasion your application has not been successful.
:yop:
They were after a Transgender. Mike should give it a go.
They just assume that Sue Perkins had finally run out of work.
Neither of those comments make any sense.
Hurrrrrrrr
My seventy-five year old predecessor came in today to explain all the crap he had left me. Seems like a bit of a legend.
Our IT lot in Malaysia just gave me access to a namesake's email inbox. He hasn't left or anything, they just didn't check to see if it was actually in use.
Been a good week, lads.
Reminds of when the wba forum I went on accidentally gave me access to the mod's subforum and I spent an hour reading them calling people cunts and stuff :D
I've been getting emails of meeting minutes from a hotel (health and safety team) in Cyprus for years now.
You should probably inform them. Of their poor health and safety.
I was going to screenshot and post all the best stuff from the old Office when we moved to this place, but it died completely before I finished checking it all out to see what was worth bothering with.
There was some quality stuff in there too. Henry and R-One did not like eachother.
It used to be absolutely class in there. Pure bitching at all times and I'm not ashamed to say I got involved occasionally. Didn't Mark fire Lewis after a while because he was off brand? I can't remember.
I can't even remember what the points of contention were that caused all the in-fighting either. Defining racism was a favourite topic, but it wasn't the only thing.
One of the things I never did as a mod was look in there. Really, really wish I did now.
I think Lewis jumped before he was pushed, but it was down to him questioning Admin decisions 'in public'. Mark didn't like that.
The best of the R-One vs Henry episodes was the former fucking around with people's profiles and the latter saying 'We must be adult at all times, we are the example.' I pissed myself laughing at that.
Yeah, I was against the 'homophobia' warnings, but I could have kept on had I just not warned anybody. It was the public criticism (lol) wot did me in the end. The best threads were all the Harold (RIP) ones. For a while it was only me and Yevrah who were against permabanning him, so fuck knows how he avoided it really.
Just had a customer scream at me down the phone (including calling me 'fucking useless') because his parts went to the wrong place - maybe 25% my error because I didn't double check, but 75% his because he didn't fucking tell me where he wanted them.
Nerves properly shredded. Should I have to endure that over £35.92 of push rods? I don't know.
10 days offshore had potential to become 21 so I'm off today.
Getting sent back on Tuesday or Thursday though :moop:
Do they have tv’s and stuff? What does ‘going offshore’ actually mean in terms of day in and day out?
The training on this job is absolutely shit.
It's like being in a hotel except you don't have your own room,
Stay In a bunk and have unlimited free food. Each bunk has sky and a wee tv and there's areas with comfy chairs and massive tv or projector. Rec area has like arcade games and PS4s and that.
Downside being it's 12 hour shifts, tiring as fuck and miles away from civilisation.
It's not that bad as a short trip. Fuck doing 21 or 28 days though.
Hi guys idk if I've mentioned but I graduated yesterday and I'm starting work next week as a doctor.
Had a call about a job today. I can’t even remember the job title but she described it as “lead generation from an extensive database.” When I said if she meant cold calling, ‘well yeah....... extensive database!’ Haha wtf. No thanks mate. Plus it’s 50 mins drive away and I’d only finish at 5:30, and would need to buy my own car.
This [ludicrously shite] job of mine has spoiled me. :(
Well, the email saga just went up a notch. My old email address was closed overnight. My only way of contacting the namesake was to phone his mobile in his signature. Left a voicemail although I'd imagine he'd be well aware that, for the last three days, he's been unable to access his emails.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig
In the off-chance we were sharing the inbox, I sent an email to myself for the other fella to look at. There's been no response. I've won. This email address is mine. :D They sent a survey out to ask how they did, too. Unfortunately, our firewall blocks it so I can't explain to them in detail how much of a fuck-up they've managed. Maybe they'll reverse it (moral good) but, chances are they'll just give the namesake a new inbox (chaotic good) because that's less work for them.
I have the same name as another doctor who works as a GP but is also a tutor for the medical school. I was sent various pretty sensitive documents on a number of occasions, including exam results for students in his tutor group and a certificate awarded to him for some training. Lol.
EDIT: This one really wasn't me trying to jam "I'm a doctor lol" into every post...
So far, all I've gotten is meeting minutes, an update on an ADSL line and a couple of invoices picked up by our spam filter.
I can’t remember exactly how it happened but I was once sent another persons Facebook login details. Assuming it wouldn’t work I tried it and it worked, logging me in as a girl from Birmingham. I checked her photos (not fit) and noticed all the recent ‘not allowed on timeline’ pics were her smoking at a party. I allowed them on her timeline and logged out. I presume I caused some lasting damage. :baz:
:lol:
:D
dots
Proper thundercunt behaviour, that. What a surprise.
No it was me who did it, not you.
If I was ever friends with Baz, I'd seriously wonder what level of distance I'd need to avoid being caught by something like that. :D
I'm on day six of a 9 day conference and I'm 99% of the way to quitting and leaving these fuckers to wallow in it. I've been called every name under the sun to my face by people who earn twice as much as me for concentrating on the job I'm paid to do rather than covering for their own fuckups.
I'm coming home. Unless several people come to me once their stress levels drop and personally apologise I'm abandoning the quitting in 2020 plan and just get a job at a Premier League club doing wank social media videos announcing transfers.
Got a job interview on Monday. Never really had one. Any tips?
Pulling a sickie to attend.
Offer them a blowjob/muffmunch.
My interview to get this job was weird as hell. The guy just talked about himself for an hour, promised me an answer by the end of the week (it was a Monday), and told me I was hired three hours later.
Practice making towers with marshmallows and raw spaghetti.
I need to do a few too so as to keep in practice. Awful going for one after years of not doing them.
I will hopefully have some interviews soon as I've finally had enough where I am. I got home on whatever day it was and applied for a load of stuff. There's one in another department doing stuff not dissimilar to stuff I'm already doing and the money's ace but it would involve night shifts and I dunno how I'd get on with that.
Did it for years and it has its advantages, but really nights is a young mans game.
First day of school holidays. Feels fucking great, even if did still get woken at 5.30 by toddler.
Put your feet on the desk and tell them you don't work Fridays.
Get a damn haircut.
Don’t be yourself.
Yeah, be Mike.
Go to the interview high on the marijuana so that when you get the job they just think that's how you normally are so you can get high every day before work and no one will ever suspect a thing!
Ha. I’ve never been high in my life tho.
Real talk: shall I lie about pulling a sickie?
Depends how you spin it. You won't be the first person to do that and you might really, really want that job.
I would like the job or else I wouldn’t go for an interview but I feel like “do your current employers know where you are today?” is likely to be asked, and saying no dey fink I’m sick lol could reflect badly on me. And god knows if it’ll affect my reference, should they end up needing one.
That will not be asked. They won't care. And even if they do, then the answer is I said I had a dentist appointment.
‘No, it’s my off day’.
Back offshore. :moop:
Didn't get my extra pay in this months payslip either :(
This morning in my 'training' I fixed one small thing that didn't work on Friday then spent the rest of the day doing nothing as the other guy in training with me faffed about doing his task for ages.
My boss is away tomorrow for 3 weeks so it's going to be a cunt of a time. At least it's a holiday weekend coming up.
I was in today, am in tomorrow then not back until Monday after next :drool: :drool:
Longest time I've been off work since I got this stupid job 2 years ago.
Going Edinburgh on Sunday for a week, but I'm almost more excited for four days of doing nothing except wanking, sleeping and watching England India test.
Both of our managers have been away all week, and then when the line manager had a day off as well it was like the last day of term.
So having lived in Southampton for 4 years, I'm now coming round to the idea that I need to move back closer to the business. 2 or 3 days a week simply isn't enough time to spend in the office. I feel like as things have been getting busier the last 6 months, work has suffered because of my proximity, and that has never happened before. I've had to reschedule meetings, skip some entirely because we couldn't arrange it on a day I was in, and in at least once instance, lost potentially lucrative work because I had to delegate a meeting to someone who wasn't really equipped to deal with it.
I'm thinking that it's probably a year away, but I guess I need to start planting the seeds now. My wife won't be too happy, but has always said she'll be supportive if I decide that I need to move back up. At least a pint will be a bit cheaper.
Looks like they're pushing for people to work from home again. I'm up for it now that I haven't got a permanent spot in the office.
One of the new girls at work just said “You should do mentoring or something, you’re wise and the youth would really relate to you”.
I’ve just been called old. :moop:
:lol:
Add her on Faceparty.
Start properly tomorrow. Terrified.
I'm also supposed to start tomorrow, but my work authorization has not arrived yet. :harold:
Jesus, what a day. It is meant to be me, another first year doctor and two second year doctors covering the ward. We had no F2s today - on our first day - for some reason (someone said they had inductions but surely nobody would be retarded enough to arrange it like that, right?). Also ALL our bloods which were taken yesterday got lost and we had to do them all again. It was brutal.
A friend in London was the only doctor on her ward today. No consultant, no registrar, no F2. She had to do her own ward round on her first day.
But nah mate, Lee says it doesn't happen.
Admins having no clue? Unpossible.
Someone keeps creating new accounts going across everything we've done posting 'Bill Clinton The Rapist' and YouTube doesn't allow you to backdate turning comments off. It's a good time.
I've also had to spend several days sucking up to that Eurovision song contest winner who's a woman with a beard or whatever. It's been a great couple of weeks.
My boss has been on total arsehole mode for the last month, to the point that a double-digit amount of people who barely have to interact with my team came up to me at the post-conference Staff Party and called her a bitch. A couple of the team are on holiday now and if she come's at them like she has me over the last week then I think our Comms team will serve notice and go from a team of 5 to a team of 2 and I'm not sticking around to rebuild it. Could be interesting times.
I was too tired to do updates from the Conference. I shook Prince Harry's hand and he came across as a much nicer person than 50-60% of the other people I interviewed. Warm blooded handshake too so I'm pretty sure he's not a lizard. Fuckin' massive bald spot though.
Not getting sacked, if anyone cares.
Also had 3 different types of cake for tea last night because the mains were shit and I suspect undercooked. Felt poisoned today.
Arrived into work today to find out my boss has decided to go on holiday. I already had very little to do and now I've got nothing. I'm leaving at like 3.
I have fuck all to do either. Europe is a disgrace - Italy seems to be closed for the next three weeks. I've only done £11,500 in two days, most of it to Poland. Nightmare.
The problem with the death of the traditional website is now I just spend my time refreshing this place and Twitter instead of the several I used to be able to rotate though. I'm so bored.
Fucking sunday night dread. :(
I've actually quite enjoyed my job after the first insane couple of days.
Having said that the hospital is ridiculously understaffed (and from friends it's the same throughout the NHS) and all the stuff you hear about it only surviving because of the good will of the staff is 100% true. Literally every day people are staying hours after their shifts end because otherwise there's nobody to look after patients. It's not sustainable.
It's terrifying to imagine what percentage of GDP would be needed to provide a sustainable service.
I suppose the trick is gypping your defence spending obligations, but maybe that's not so sustainable anymore either.
That or increasing the role of private provision like every other developed country.
Or stop pretending that the deficit matters.
When we first got our rotas I submitted a leave request on the online rota system because we are going to book a holiday for October half-term (girlfriend is a teacher). It showed on the rota as being accepted.
Then got told at induction all leave requests were done on paper forms which required a consultant signature, so I went and spoke to the rota coordinator. She said that because I'd submitted it online before the rota had been finalised it was all fine and I didn't have to do anything else.
Just had an email from someone else (2 weeks later) telling me actually I do need to do a form :) Why are people so fucking useless?
Because there's no incentive for them not to be.
They're just covering their arses with a paper trail. Today I made a person cry. Her anxiety kicked in because the call was going a bit long or something.
I work for the Ministry of Defence, and it's a standing joke that nothing works properly. Two days in I asked why, if everybody knows that nothing works, why nothing works. That was the answer. Things can apparently be made to work, but only if the right people with the right credentials go around kicking people up the arse; but then they spend all day doing that, when they should be doing other stuff, so... Deadly Dominic Cummings wrote a lol blog about it years ago:
[W]hat is really happening in Whitehall: most of everybody’s day is spent just battling entropy – it is not pursuing priorities and building valuable things... Priorities slip unless you remain dementedly focused and demented focus is an alien concept in Westminster. Because ministers can never explain the truth about 'crises', and the official story is that any glitches are occasional aberrations for 'a Rolls Royce machine', there is a tendency for the baffled public to infer ministerial conspiracies, rather than chronic dysfunction, everywhere.
Nice to think I wrote a book about a geezer encountering this sixty years ago and now I am too.
This is exactly why the UN is both the most powerful and the most useless organization in the world. My friends boss managed to bring enough budget into his team to hire 6 database engineers where they took the ONE EXCEL FILE THAT CONTAINS EVERY REFUGEE THE UNHCR HAS ON RECORD IN THE WORLD into a searchable database with the camp they were in, the contact details for said camp, their medical records etc. etc. . He moved onto a more important position 4/5ths of the way through the project, the next guy didn't want anything the previous guy had done to come to fruition so fired them all. They needed two months to finish it for a total of 120k. They'd spent 1.3 million on it up to that point.
Take note of that next time you see an official list of refugees from the UN. It is one excel file.
Anyone that has worked Corporate Communications knows that this is exactly how everything private or public works though. It's just when easier to spin to shareholders.
I have had decent stints in both the public and private sectors and can tell you right now that any similarities between them are purely cosmetic.
There's one simple difference which is that in the private sector, if everything goes to pot above you then by definition you are out of a job - which creates the constant incentive to continue performing your particular cog well, because everyone involved needs the edifice to stay upright. In the public sector, if everything goes to pot above you then some cunt resigns and some other load of cunts come in to take their place, but the building never crumbles (except literally) and you are never in danger.
Asian private sector and American private sector are completely different. The amount of zombies we had on ginormous contracts at DuPont was insane. To hit our stock prices, the various regions would get together and you would ship 30 crates of paint from EMEA to South America, 50 crates of Teflon from South America to Asia. etc. etc. Because anything in transit isn't declared as on the books, meaning you would hit your stock declaration and everyone would keep their job for another 3 months. It's the same game it just involves better accountants and zero people ever having to take responsibility. Whereas with the public sector, someone always finds out and you can't pay them off.
We did that and then performed a stock buyback every quarter for 18 months. It was fraud, the entire company was a shell. And that's a NASDAQ Top 100 company that's over 200 years old. That actually makes stuff and real things that actually exist. Stuff that genuinely effects the world for the better (alongside a load of hanus shit). But that's not what matters. It's all a game.
GM made 2.4 billion in profits last quarter and hires 180,000 people. It's share price is 39 dollars. Tesla lost half a billion last quarter and hires less than 40,000. Stock price, 395. None of it is real. It is a game being played over and over and over by the people who have so much money they can afford to play.
Yeah, this could be my job for life or one decision up top could end it all. It always feels that way when you're working in businesses that cannot stop.
Say you had a choice between company A where the work isn't very interesting and probably not giving you the experience you wanted/hope for but has a pretty laid-back and relaxed atmosphere or company B where the work would likely be a lot more interesting but the company has a bad rep for how they treat staff, what would you pick?
Company B, but lay somebody out on your first day.
Sold my first item without clarifying my commission plan.
back to work after a fortnight off, i'm not delighted
B always.
C. Take both jobs like a hard working Protestant LAD.
I have an interview tomorrow for a job that has "engineer" in the title. Beyond pushing an Ethernet cable into the back of a phone what else do I need to know? I'd hate to miss out on the promised land through sheer ignorance.
You might also have to sell things for no commission.
I threatened to leave unless I could drop the selling part :drool:
It still needs considerable strengthening.
How are those commissions going?
Fine, if I was actually unemployed I'd have doubled my salary by now. So take that.
Our office alcoholic came in shitfaced today and got aggressive when she was sent home. Bleak.
Currently doing subtitles in Malawi but they haven't given me timestamps so I'm just looking at when they stop for a breath and guessing.
I'm not going to have "engineer" in my job title in the immediate future. The dream of being more like Pepe is over. :(
My employers are really dragging their feet with my reference. Is that allowed?
New HR rang me on 1st August saying they were sending for references. I said to send the request for personal one but hold on sending the one to my current boss because I haven't told them yet. Never got round to telling them and a request for a reference was sent on Wednesday 8th August and new HR still haven't heard anything back. I pestered my boss on Friday who then claimed to have sent it on Saturday. I've been on holiday until today so rang new HR checking everything was as it should be and if they could give me a start date (so I can officially hand my notice in) and they said they hadn't received anything. :mad: I messaged my boss telling her to send it. "Will do :thbup:" was all I got back. I'll ring them again tomorrow and they have better bloody received it.
How long can they delay it for legally?
Do jobs actually care about references? I've got them but I've never been asked to present them.
Engineering is wank anyway. Avoid.
Sales is where it's at.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Oil-Platfor.../dp/B005IWCCYC
Better yourself yo.
Did my first on-call yesterday.
So ridiculous. So out of my depth, far too much to cover for one person, asked to do so many dangerous things. Just absolutely horrible.
I don't think I'll be staying in clinical medicine long-term. I don't have the risk tolerance required - when the thing at risk is someone else's health - to work in the NHS in it's current state. Looking at medical writing, since it will use some of the skills/knowledge I already have whilst also giving a bit of a creative outlet which I definitely need.
You could start a medical and blancmange crossover Instagram account.
I'll give you a non-paying credit for the idea when I'm a millionaire.
Sounds to me like you can't handle the pressure. Kids these days...
Yeah, IDK, maybe I'm just a pussy. Either way.
‘Maybe I’m just a pussy’ says the Chocolatier.
First day of classes today. Donned it.
First actual vacation that isn't just taking off the time between christmas and new year in 3 years. :drool:
Spent half of today watching video tutorials by some Australian wanking on about some business analytics software. It was like psychological torture.
Yeah Youtube culture has made learning awful. The amount of things that I have to watch an 8 minute video where the first 4 minutes are burnt giving shoutouts to his subscribers and asking for likes is infuriating. Back in the day when they just gave you a 1 through 8 steps in text from made it easy to breeze through.
I quite like video tutorials (it was on Udemy where I've bought a few courses for myself before), it was more just the grating accent (sorry Ital) and the boring subject that isn't anything like what I expected to be doing when I signed up for the job.
Results are in, and my class have done surprisingly well - one lad was predicted a 5 and got an 8 (that's B to an A* in old money). The other class however have dragged us right down. They weren't intentionally split by ability but they really were. Think I'll go into school though to see them, maybe try and recruit a few more for A-Level.
What are you trying to get out of using it?
Seven days to go. :jayjay:
Until?
I’m done with my job and all the horrible people associated with it.
Yeah. I don't like it very much. Also, I took this job thinking I'd be doing some fucking coding and I've done fuck all so far. This Qlik Sense crap is new as some clients want some shit made with it and I'm the first one learning it so I'll end up getting pigeon holed in it.
Good job I'm leaving in a few weeks for the other job that I was offered at the same time. :baz:
It's just SQL which isn't coding per se. It's interesting if you want to go further into data stuff but frankly learning basic SQL and getting into something like Python is going to be more generally applicable.
Yeah, I know SQL. You don't even need it to use Qlik Sense though.
I took the job under the impression it was a Java development job (my job title is 'Developer'). The online test I did for it had Java and SQL (and Unix although I didn't know any of that at the time) and was the hardest job application test I've taken (3 interviews, 3 jobs, 100% strike rate :cool: ) but there's really not very much code involved in the actual job at all. There's not even that much for the more senior guys. So I'm off to the other place to work on C# stuff. It's an actual software engineering (go team!) job so hopefully it'll give me better experience.
Fuck yeah. :cool:
Is this the one in London?
Was transferring cash onto my credit card and noticed my balance was massive. I'd forgot my bonus was coming in. It's the most I've ever had in my account so it's blackjack and hookers this week.
So having still not clarified a commission plan (we have raised it multiple times but got nothing back), and having both sold products...the end result is this month's pay having no commission. Ha. Who'd have thought!
Imagine if they backpay that.