He was.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
He used to buy houses under various different names to cut down on tax and shit. He'd over order as a builder, then taken the materials home for free etc.
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He was.Quote:
Originally Posted by phonics
He used to buy houses under various different names to cut down on tax and shit. He'd over order as a builder, then taken the materials home for free etc.
So he was a successful conman that then got conned by a fucking hooker? Get this movie going.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Andy Mahowry
Just went down for diesel and some headscarf wearing suicide bomber wench in a jeep decided to wait for a pump (4 others were free) by stopping and waiting right across the gate while 3 of us had to sit indicating on the road to try get in.
That's worth the points. Fair play.
Fuck that. If I said she was a baguette toting french surrender monkey an eyelid wouldn't be batted. Same for countless other types too.Quote:
Originally Posted by Offshore Toon
Yeah, but those stereotypes are true. Not all headscarf wearing wenches are suicide bombers.
How old's your step-mum now, Mahow?
Early 40s I believe.
She still fit?
You're far too poor.
Would you sign the lot over for a bit of motorboating?
Take that as a yes, Boyd.
Post some revenge porn, Mahow.
Suddenly Mahow makes so much sense.
Poor cunt never stood a chance.
The radio is infested with horse racing this week, the very shittest of sports.
Just hire a fucking Hitman Mahow. Get a Ukranian one and then blame it on her dodgey life before she fled to Cyprus.
Yeah, does anybody appreciate horse racing as an actual sport? I thought it was purely for gambling.Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco
About the only point to it really.
It would die without bookmakers so no.
Would be awesome if they bigged up the horses like prizefighters but they'd rather slap the trainers on the back.
The internet at my folks is awful. What am I meant to do with 1.8MB down?
Why has my phone undergone some sort of update whereby the way you used to answer it instead now rejects the call? Is someone having a fucking laugh?
Actors who refuse to age. Coronation Street's gone super weird. Sarah Lou's back in at the ripe old age of whatever side of 40 Tina O'Brien is on and she's going out with grown-up Chesney who was about 7 when she left the first time around. They both look 18. Meanwhile David Platt is still acting like a 15 year old.
Age, you cunts. Or act better.
Tina O'Brien's daughter looks older than her. Considerably older.
Had a tooth ache for a day or so, been popping Senna tablets four hourly ever since because they look identical to Ibuprofen and I'm a fucking idiot. Still, the coming arse piss should help with the weight loss.
When you forget about your cup of tea and it goes cold.
Cold tea :s
Get another one.
Microwave it.
We're currently staying at Centre Parcs and the boedroom is so fucking hot its ridiculous. No idea how my wife and baby are sleeping in it. The thing on the wall says it's 27c in there. Would be great if said 'thing on the wall' controlled some Air-con, but no, it just controls the heating which is set to 18c.
I've been stuck in the local Tesco car park for about an hour now. Fucking Mother's Day bullshit.
In the car like?Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
On foot. Won't admit he's got lost.
How can Mother's Day cause traffic? Is there only one card shop in Ireland?
Repeal the 6th.
I know you're only trolling but I still feel obliged to correct you and tell you he probably didn't venture from Ballymena to Ireland for the card.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Yeah, there were plenty of spaces but just a massive queue of traffic all around the car park waiting to get out which was holding up people getting in too. Took about half an hour to get around to where there were spaces and get into one then about half an hour to get out of the car park again after I'd been in the shop for five minutes.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Shit small town with a couple of big supermarkets on the outskirts of it. I was in the town centre earlier but there are only two card shops left these days. Had a look in them both but they were shit. Also wanted to get some chocolates and Tesco was probably the best place to do that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
It's not because of mother's day, it's because it's a standard Saturday and women are fucking obsessed with parking as close to the door as possible. You'd swear a 30 yard walk would kill them.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Nah, I don't think it was that. Saturdays are always pretty busy there and it seemed worse today. It's a terribly designed car park too. Traffic doesn't flow in and out of it well at all.
He could, if needed, have driven to anywhere on the island of Ireland. He didn't mention any marine transport so it's unlikely he'd have been somewhere else.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Good weather too (if it's anything like here) so every cunt has the need to buy a tray of Tennents and a disposable barbeque.Quote:
Originally Posted by Boydy
Yeah still, it'd be like constantly referring to Spain and Portugal as Iberia. Which you don't. So like I said, trolling.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
Your national rugby/cricket teams must be trolling as well. From now on I will always refer to the rock as 'Ireland', and the nation state as 'the Irish Republic', to avoid confusion.
Ha, there were quite a few fellas with crates of beer. I think Fosters was on offer.Quote:
Originally Posted by Giggles
Calm down, the pair of you. Martin McGuinness didn't die for this.
My mother parks miles away from the mass because she thinks everybody is out to open doors into or scrape trolleys against her car. This isn't that annoying in itself, but when you combine it with her being the worst and least considerate driver in existence you have to wonder what sort of world she lives in.
That's fine, even though you're completely wrong. Never underestimate a British education though.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd
What is this?
Toggle Spoiler
For the sake of clarity, what is the island called then? Great Ireland?