The Missing Dog Walker

And for anyone wondering it's Bobi (30) from Portugal.

https://i.imgur.com/vobcJwt.png

Look at his little face.

How do they verify that?

It's Guinness. They don't. Records are bought.

Yeah but where's a dog getting that money?

If you go on the Wikipedia page relating to her disappearance, one of the related articles is “List of fatal dog attacks in the United Kingdom” :sherlock:

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Originally Posted by Spikey M

Nowhere near enough has been made of this. Either the police know but were keeping it quiet, or they've dropped a major bollock.

She's done a runner or he's killed her.

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As soon as I saw she was self employed last night I started rifling through companies house to find a failing business. I couldn't find the right Nicola Bulley though. :face:

The self employed angle also completely fucks with the notion that she was only needed on the Teams call to listen and not say anything. I've worked with a lot of self employed people who've gone on to sell their businesses and there's no way any of them would have said nothing on a half an hour call related to their business. Not a fucking chance. So I'd love to know the context of this Teams call.

The whole self-employed person on a Teams call with her employer thing baffled me too.

What industry is she in?

Mortgage advising, but I still haven't found her on companies house. She's not an officer of her partner's business.

And on that, the business is hardly failing when you look at the accounts. They're abridged, but it looks like one that just never took off and it hasn't left a whole load of creditors behind it. Certainly not to level of this all being worth while.

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Originally Posted by Yevrah

Mortgage advising, but I still haven't found her on companies house. She's not an officer of her partner's business.

And on that, the business is hardly failing when you look at the accounts. They're abridged, but it looks like one that just never took off and it hasn't left a whole load of creditors behind it. Certainly not to level of this all being worth while.

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She works for a company called 'Just Mortgages' would be my guess hence the Teams call it's a halfway house between being self-employed and employed. I'd imagine she's also set up as a sole-trader as you don't need to be a limited company to set up.

Im starting to think Yev killed her.

Opening scene on the moon, the flag the US placed can be seen and in the distance is earth, we zoom in through Google Maps to a river bank. A middle aged (mid 40s) mortgage advisor is trying to walk her dog. The year is 2023 but all the audience can tell is it's modern day-ish.

‘This berry vape juice tastes off. Shambles’

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Originally Posted by phonics

Im starting to think Yev killed her.

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Yev would be the worst serial killer on the board. He'd get found out by keeping too close an eye on the investigation.

Jimmy is the obvious pick for the best, as demonstrated by his theory last night. Some nice lateral thinking. But I think the real winner would be Boydy. Intelligent enough to go to Oxbridge, but disorganised enough to miss a flight. The crimes would sway from genius to retarded. They'd never pin down an MO.

The broom did it.

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Originally Posted by Spikey M

Yev would be the worst serial killer on the board. He'd get found out by keeping too close an eye on the investigation.

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Isn't that how Huntley or whatever his name was got done for those kids. Did a SkyNews interview and all.

Louise Letby's definitely one of those types as well. Following the parents around and being all, "GREAT NEWS! DEAD CHILDREN!"

Quote:

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Originally Posted by phonics

Isn't that how Huntley or whatever his name was got done for those kids. Did a SkyNews interview and all.

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He did, but he was a genuine psychopath with delusions of grandeur. Anyone who has watched any Colombo at all knows you need to keep well away.

Yev's clearly thought about it.

Probably has a disposal method too.

An inept local police force + a two feet deep river for the win.

didn't need the word local or an.

I have James as my third best serial killer. Methodical and analytical, but ultimately brought down by a detailed spreadsheet titled xbodies, foolishly stored via cloudstorage.

There might be a thread in this.

Giggles, on the road a lot, access to a van, disposes of things by digging holes in his back yard.

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Originally Posted by niko_cee

Giggles, on the road a lot, access to a van, disposes of things by digging holes in his back yard.

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Not to mention his two masks. Must help with the smell loads.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Spikey M

I have James as my third best serial killer. Methodical and analytical, but ultimately brought down by a detailed spreadsheet titled xbodies, foolishly stored via cloudstorage.

There might be a thread in this.

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You just sell a body to kebab shops, easy as.

I've always had a mental image of him looking like Levi Bellfield as well

Quote:

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Originally Posted by niko_cee

Giggles, on the road a lot, access to a van, disposes of things by digging holes in his back yard.

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I’d just kill someone in a fit of rage without ever thinking about hiding it. There’s many better serial killer candidates here but I don’t think anyone tops Yev. Always obsessive types.

I'd imagine the first step to being a serial killer would be realising the capacity to actually kill someone.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Giggles

I’d just kill someone in a fit of rage

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:sherlock:

Nice try, but admitting you’d remorselessly kill someone breaking into your house or similar (I’d hope most would) isn’t even close to your levels of obsessive craziness. Own it, you’ve shown it time and time again.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Giggles

Nice try, but admitting you’d remorselessly kill someone breaking into your house or similar (I’d hope most would) isn’t even close to your levels of obsessive craziness. Own it, you’ve shown it time and time again.

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Yeah, I'm not doing this again. Goodbye Giggles.

Well done, Giggles. Another lass is going missing tonight now.

Wetter than Bulley's body.

It's pointless getting into a debate with a professional wind-up merchant/yeast infection. All his cheerleaders turn up and it's just awful squared.

So ... errr... when are we archiving the Covid thread?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Dquincy

Well done, Giggles. Another lass is going missing tonight now.

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:D

I understand Yev not wanting to engage with Giggles but the idea that he has an army of cheerleaders which is what makes it not worthwhile is very funny.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Dquincy

Well done, Giggles. Another lass is going missing tonight now.

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https://i.gifer.com/KOC9.gif

The main drawback to killing an intruder in your house I'd imagine is all their pikey mates camping outside your house saying what a good lad they were after.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by phonics

I understand Yev not wanting to engage with Giggles but the idea that he has an army of cheerleaders which is what makes it not worthwhile is very funny.

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Like a lot of you he doesn’t want to engage because he likes to dish it out but expects not to get it back.

The cheerleader one is funny though, as I’d be the last person to have them here. It’s like he’s working off a ‘how to argue on the internet’ guide from 2003.

He’ll be rickrolling you next.

Looks like that chap on the GB News link that was posted upthread is bringing his sonar to the river imminently, which supposedly has a very high hit rate.

If she's not there this gets blown wide open.

Ah well if the crank off GB News can’t find her then that’s that.

Why's he a crank?

He's a forensic search and reacue expert they had on as a guest. Not one of their crank hosts.

I've heard Eamonn Holmes is due down there with his metal detector tomorrow.

Then Gazza with a KFC.

You mean to tell me Eamonn Holmes that isn't wading into the river in a wet suit?

Edit: Fuck off Spikey

What are the fucking chances? :D

:D

:D

Keep up Phonics.